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1
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,317
Dads is recorded in front
of a live studio audience.
2
00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:23,220
Edna...
3
00:00:23,255 --> 00:00:24,955
do you know, uh,
where my receipts are?
4
00:00:24,990 --> 00:00:26,724
?Que?
Receipts.
5
00:00:26,758 --> 00:00:28,125
The little slips
of paper you get
6
00:00:28,126 --> 00:00:30,427
when you buy things
in a store?
7
00:00:30,462 --> 00:00:32,897
?Que?
8
00:00:32,931 --> 00:00:34,331
Receipts.
9
00:00:34,332 --> 00:00:36,066
You know, you need 'em
for when you file your taxes.
10
00:00:36,101 --> 00:00:38,335
Taxes...
Yeah.
11
00:00:39,871 --> 00:00:42,339
(laughing)
12
00:00:43,808 --> 00:00:46,477
You funny, Mr. Eli.
13
00:00:46,511 --> 00:00:48,279
Taxes...
14
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,281
(toilet flushes)
15
00:00:53,451 --> 00:00:55,019
Dad, what were you
doing in there?
16
00:00:55,020 --> 00:00:57,988
Short-track
speed-skating.
17
00:00:57,989 --> 00:00:59,823
What do you think
I was doing?
18
00:00:59,824 --> 00:01:01,158
Hey...
19
00:01:01,159 --> 00:01:02,326
where did you
get that?
20
00:01:02,327 --> 00:01:03,928
From one of those
boxes upstairs.
21
00:01:03,929 --> 00:01:05,396
Don't worry, you
got tons of these.
22
00:01:05,397 --> 00:01:06,630
No, no, no,
no, no, no.
23
00:01:06,631 --> 00:01:08,632
This is Freedom League
number 21.
24
00:01:08,667 --> 00:01:11,835
(mocking):
Ooh, it is?
25
00:01:11,870 --> 00:01:13,404
Yes.
This is the first team-up
26
00:01:13,405 --> 00:01:14,738
between the Golden Age
Freedom League
27
00:01:14,739 --> 00:01:16,740
and the Silver Age Freedom
Society of Earth Beta.
28
00:01:16,741 --> 00:01:18,409
Do you have any idea
how much this is worth?
29
00:01:18,443 --> 00:01:20,678
Four years of
high school virginity.
30
00:01:24,182 --> 00:01:26,450
Dad, you cannot bring my comic
books into the bathroom, okay?
31
00:01:26,451 --> 00:01:27,785
They mean a lot to me.
32
00:01:28,820 --> 00:01:30,621
More than I mean to you?
33
00:01:34,793 --> 00:01:36,460
Look, the point is,
if you're going to live here,
34
00:01:36,461 --> 00:01:37,695
you have to
respect my things.
35
00:01:37,729 --> 00:01:40,397
Well, you've got to
respect my things, buddy.
36
00:01:40,432 --> 00:01:41,709
Buddy?
37
00:01:41,733 --> 00:01:44,201
I blanked on your name
for a minute.
38
00:01:46,738 --> 00:01:48,739
Sorry, Chief.
39
00:01:51,910 --> 00:01:55,346
Daddy took me to the zoo
40
00:01:55,380 --> 00:01:57,381
Na, na, na, na
41
00:01:57,415 --> 00:02:01,385
Just to see
something brand-new
42
00:02:01,419 --> 00:02:03,420
Na, na, na
43
00:02:03,455 --> 00:02:07,658
So many stars up in the sky
44
00:02:07,659 --> 00:02:12,129
So many questions have I
45
00:02:12,130 --> 00:02:14,231
Na, na, na, na
46
00:02:14,232 --> 00:02:15,756
Daddy took me for a ride.
47
00:02:15,757 --> 00:02:19,609
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
48
00:02:19,925 --> 00:02:21,438
Um, Warner,
I'm not sure about
49
00:02:21,439 --> 00:02:22,606
some of these
write-offs.
50
00:02:22,641 --> 00:02:24,842
Uh, what's this receipt
for a $600 suit?
51
00:02:24,876 --> 00:02:27,711
That was, uh, a business meeting
with a potential investor.
52
00:02:27,746 --> 00:02:28,745
Did he invest?
53
00:02:28,747 --> 00:02:30,581
No, but he, uh...
54
00:02:30,582 --> 00:02:33,017
he said "nice suit."
55
00:02:33,051 --> 00:02:35,486
Well, why would a suit
for you cost that much?
56
00:02:35,487 --> 00:02:38,656
You have the body of
a Price is Right microphone.
57
00:02:38,690 --> 00:02:40,457
I'm not that skinny.
58
00:02:40,492 --> 00:02:41,959
CRAWFORD:
Oh, come on, son.
59
00:02:41,993 --> 00:02:43,394
You were so skinny
60
00:02:43,395 --> 00:02:45,729
your mother didn't know
she was in labor.
61
00:02:45,730 --> 00:02:48,565
She just got up off
the couch and there you were.
62
00:02:48,566 --> 00:02:51,035
Thank God for
plastic slipcovers.
63
00:02:51,069 --> 00:02:53,070
(chuckles)
64
00:02:55,273 --> 00:02:56,473
Hey.
65
00:02:56,474 --> 00:02:57,675
Sorry I'm late, guys.
66
00:02:57,709 --> 00:02:59,376
I had to get all my comics
out of my apartment
67
00:02:59,377 --> 00:03:00,412
and put 'em in a storage unit.
68
00:03:00,445 --> 00:03:01,512
Why would you do that?
69
00:03:01,546 --> 00:03:02,579
I caught my dad
70
00:03:02,580 --> 00:03:03,714
coming out of
the bathroom
71
00:03:03,715 --> 00:03:05,716
reading Freedom League 21.
72
00:03:06,918 --> 00:03:08,018
Wait, that's the first crossover
73
00:03:08,019 --> 00:03:09,720
between the Silver Age
Freedom League
74
00:03:09,754 --> 00:03:11,055
and the Golden Age Freedom Society...
Golden Age Freedom Society, yeah.
75
00:03:11,089 --> 00:03:12,056
You had to get them out of there.
Of course.
76
00:03:12,090 --> 00:03:13,624
You know who'd love working here
77
00:03:13,625 --> 00:03:15,426
is a schoolyard bully.
78
00:03:17,162 --> 00:03:18,829
I love those comics. Yeah.
79
00:03:18,830 --> 00:03:20,197
What I would do
to that collection
80
00:03:20,198 --> 00:03:21,498
if I got my hands on it...
81
00:03:21,533 --> 00:03:22,900
Hey, hey, easy.
82
00:03:22,934 --> 00:03:24,635
The first hour,
I'd spread it out
83
00:03:24,636 --> 00:03:26,937
and just stare at it
like a psychopath.
84
00:03:26,971 --> 00:03:28,605
And then I'd
85
00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,841
slowly start reading it
and reading it,
86
00:03:30,842 --> 00:03:32,509
and I'd read it harder...
87
00:03:32,544 --> 00:03:34,446
front to back,
88
00:03:34,479 --> 00:03:36,814
back to front...
89
00:03:36,848 --> 00:03:39,717
up against a wall.
90
00:03:39,751 --> 00:03:41,018
No way.
91
00:03:41,019 --> 00:03:42,352
You'd-you'd read it
in two minutes,
92
00:03:42,353 --> 00:03:44,688
apologize, and
just fall asleep.
93
00:03:44,723 --> 00:03:46,256
CRAWFORD:
You're right.
94
00:03:46,291 --> 00:03:47,391
He used to fall asleep
95
00:03:47,392 --> 00:03:48,625
on the couch with his comics
96
00:03:48,626 --> 00:03:50,060
while his mother and I
97
00:03:50,061 --> 00:03:51,361
watched The Cosby Show.
98
00:03:51,362 --> 00:03:52,830
(laughs)
99
00:03:52,864 --> 00:03:55,165
You and your wife watch
a lot of TV together?
100
00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:56,867
Yeah, she told me
she was leaving me
101
00:03:56,868 --> 00:03:58,068
while the Huxtables flushed
102
00:03:58,069 --> 00:03:59,837
Rudy's goldfish down the toilet.
103
00:04:03,408 --> 00:04:04,407
Hey, Warner,
104
00:04:04,409 --> 00:04:05,849
you had a comic book
collection, too?
105
00:04:05,877 --> 00:04:08,212
Yeah, I had...
I had quite the collection.
106
00:04:08,213 --> 00:04:11,648
I had 3,752.
107
00:04:11,683 --> 00:04:13,117
What happened to it?
108
00:04:13,151 --> 00:04:14,653
My dad sold it. CRAWFORD: No.
109
00:04:14,686 --> 00:04:16,520
I swapped them.
110
00:04:16,521 --> 00:04:19,823
Remember, those Indians gave us
all those blankets?
111
00:04:19,858 --> 00:04:21,725
We got so sick?
112
00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:22,960
CRAWFORD:
I tried to go back
113
00:04:22,994 --> 00:04:24,995
to the trading post
to reverse the deal,
114
00:04:24,996 --> 00:04:26,864
and it was nothing but
an empty parking lot
115
00:04:26,865 --> 00:04:29,633
and nobody had any idea
what I was talking about.
116
00:04:29,634 --> 00:04:30,901
Of course, at that point,
117
00:04:30,902 --> 00:04:34,304
I was living on Reggie bars
and angel dust.
118
00:04:40,712 --> 00:04:41,745
The kids
are asleep.
119
00:04:41,780 --> 00:04:43,147
Oh, thanks, honey.
120
00:04:43,148 --> 00:04:44,148
(giggles)
121
00:04:44,149 --> 00:04:45,517
What are you wearing?
122
00:04:45,550 --> 00:04:47,684
Oh, I thought I'd just slip into
123
00:04:47,685 --> 00:04:50,254
something a little
more comfortable.
124
00:04:50,288 --> 00:04:52,900
Those are my pants.
125
00:04:55,093 --> 00:04:56,226
Read the label.
126
00:04:58,329 --> 00:05:00,964
"Abigail Landress."
127
00:05:00,999 --> 00:05:02,599
The zipper's on
the hip, there, buddy.
128
00:05:02,634 --> 00:05:05,102
Just like 007.
129
00:05:05,103 --> 00:05:06,336
Okay, well,
why don't you just
130
00:05:06,371 --> 00:05:07,805
take your jeans out of
the laundry basket
131
00:05:07,806 --> 00:05:08,906
and we'll never
speak of this again.
132
00:05:08,940 --> 00:05:10,083
Yep.
133
00:05:10,108 --> 00:05:11,942
Whoa.
134
00:05:11,943 --> 00:05:13,921
Camila, introduce me
to your friend.
135
00:05:16,748 --> 00:05:19,416
Oh...
136
00:05:19,450 --> 00:05:21,553
Hi, son.
I'm sorry.
137
00:05:21,586 --> 00:05:24,054
I'm-I'm just a sucker
for a Landress backside.
138
00:05:24,055 --> 00:05:25,222
(chuckles)
139
00:05:25,223 --> 00:05:26,222
Here, these are for you.
140
00:05:26,224 --> 00:05:27,758
What do you
got there?
141
00:05:27,759 --> 00:05:30,027
Well, take a look.
142
00:05:30,028 --> 00:05:31,695
Oh, my God, Dad,
143
00:05:31,696 --> 00:05:33,463
these are filled with comics.
Mm-hmm.
144
00:05:33,498 --> 00:05:34,832
Look at this.
145
00:05:34,833 --> 00:05:35,999
X-Men...
146
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,067
Yep.
147
00:05:37,068 --> 00:05:38,067
Superman...
148
00:05:38,069 --> 00:05:39,803
The head cheese.
149
00:05:39,838 --> 00:05:41,271
Batman and Robin...
150
00:05:41,306 --> 00:05:44,374
Top and bottom.
151
00:05:44,409 --> 00:05:47,811
Okay, now you're starting to
suck all the fun out of it.
152
00:05:47,846 --> 00:05:49,847
Oh, that's a job for Robin.
153
00:05:54,853 --> 00:05:58,288
Yeah, I just felt so bad
that I swapped your comics
154
00:05:58,289 --> 00:06:01,959
with those people who
might be ghosts, and, uh...
155
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,027
I decided to get you
some new ones.
156
00:06:04,062 --> 00:06:05,229
Dad...
157
00:06:05,263 --> 00:06:06,263
this is amazing!
Thank you.
158
00:06:06,264 --> 00:06:07,231
Wh-Where did you
get these?
159
00:06:07,265 --> 00:06:08,866
I computered 'em.
160
00:06:08,867 --> 00:06:11,468
Turns out there is
this guy named Craig
161
00:06:11,469 --> 00:06:13,313
who has this list of
all sorts of stuff
162
00:06:13,338 --> 00:06:14,571
that he sells.
163
00:06:14,572 --> 00:06:15,606
From comics to...
164
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,741
to old furniture, to cars...
Yeah.
165
00:06:17,742 --> 00:06:21,678
And I think he may be
some kind of pimp.
166
00:06:25,183 --> 00:06:27,995
$4,000 for a home
security system?
167
00:06:28,019 --> 00:06:29,620
That's totally a write-off.
168
00:06:29,621 --> 00:06:32,089
I have all kinds of valuable
company assets at home.
169
00:06:32,123 --> 00:06:32,990
Like what?
170
00:06:32,991 --> 00:06:34,992
Like me.
171
00:06:36,027 --> 00:06:37,561
Yeah, ever since he saw Taken,
172
00:06:37,562 --> 00:06:38,695
he's been worried
someone's gonna
173
00:06:38,696 --> 00:06:39,963
drag him out from under his bed
174
00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:41,431
and sell him into
sexual slavery.
175
00:06:42,901 --> 00:06:44,301
Ever since I saw Taken 2,
176
00:06:44,302 --> 00:06:46,270
I've been worried that
it was gonna happen again.
177
00:06:47,639 --> 00:06:49,907
So, are you loving your comics?
178
00:06:49,941 --> 00:06:51,508
Oh, my God, they're so good.
179
00:06:51,542 --> 00:06:52,976
Yeah.
180
00:06:53,011 --> 00:06:54,244
I mean,
I can't wait to show you.
181
00:06:54,245 --> 00:06:55,746
I-I... they're as good as yours.
182
00:06:55,780 --> 00:06:58,282
(laughing):
Okay, come on.
183
00:06:58,316 --> 00:06:59,616
I mean...
184
00:06:59,651 --> 00:07:01,551
slow down there, Tex.
185
00:07:01,586 --> 00:07:02,654
What?
186
00:07:02,687 --> 00:07:03,820
Your dad buys
187
00:07:03,821 --> 00:07:05,155
some cheapo collection
off the Internet
188
00:07:05,156 --> 00:07:06,423
and it's as good as mine?
189
00:07:06,424 --> 00:07:07,658
Come on.
190
00:07:07,659 --> 00:07:09,760
That is some pretty bold talk,
there, fella.
191
00:07:09,794 --> 00:07:11,762
Oh, it's not just talk, partner.
192
00:07:11,796 --> 00:07:13,373
Oh! Oh, is that right?
193
00:07:13,398 --> 00:07:14,531
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
194
00:07:14,565 --> 00:07:15,732
Well, I'll tell you what...
195
00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:17,567
you show me yours,
I'll show you mine.
196
00:07:18,937 --> 00:07:21,305
Wow, this is what it
must've been like
197
00:07:21,306 --> 00:07:23,675
in the Old Gay West.
198
00:07:25,643 --> 00:07:28,312
So we get all my X-Men
from the '70s,
199
00:07:28,313 --> 00:07:29,880
and I'll get all
my Fantastic Fours...
200
00:07:29,881 --> 00:07:31,248
Ugh, storage units
creep me out.
201
00:07:31,249 --> 00:07:32,382
Why?
202
00:07:32,383 --> 00:07:34,584
Our whole family lived
in one till I was four.
203
00:07:34,585 --> 00:07:37,187
Well, as long as you were happy.
204
00:07:37,188 --> 00:07:38,855
I wasn't.
205
00:07:38,890 --> 00:07:42,027
Gosh, I'm so glad I don't
come from other places.
206
00:07:43,594 --> 00:07:46,031
(grunting)
207
00:07:47,065 --> 00:07:48,565
(screams)
208
00:07:50,001 --> 00:07:51,401
My comics are gone!
209
00:07:52,437 --> 00:07:53,870
Quiet down!
210
00:07:53,905 --> 00:07:55,505
Yeah!
People trying to sleep!
211
00:08:03,300 --> 00:08:04,500
Now... (sighs)
212
00:08:04,501 --> 00:08:05,868
...were you storing
anything else
213
00:08:05,869 --> 00:08:07,770
besides your cartoons?
214
00:08:07,771 --> 00:08:09,305
Uh, they're comic books.
215
00:08:09,306 --> 00:08:10,373
What did I say?
216
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:11,741
Oh, you called them cartoons.
217
00:08:11,775 --> 00:08:13,109
God!
218
00:08:13,110 --> 00:08:15,478
I hope they don't take
my badge away for that.
219
00:08:15,512 --> 00:08:17,346
How about you, miss?
220
00:08:17,347 --> 00:08:18,346
Are you his...
221
00:08:18,348 --> 00:08:19,348
(laughs)
222
00:08:19,349 --> 00:08:20,516
No.
223
00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:24,287
Good for you.
224
00:08:24,321 --> 00:08:26,422
Now, aside from
your cartoons,
225
00:08:26,456 --> 00:08:28,924
you say you're missing
several Star Trek lasers?
226
00:08:28,959 --> 00:08:31,494
Uh... phasers.
227
00:08:31,528 --> 00:08:32,662
What's the difference?
228
00:08:32,696 --> 00:08:34,997
Well, a laser is
a focused beam of light,
229
00:08:34,998 --> 00:08:38,134
whereas a phaser is
a directed-energy weapon.
230
00:08:38,168 --> 00:08:39,235
Mm-hmm.
231
00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:40,770
Well, are you gonna
232
00:08:40,771 --> 00:08:42,305
get a forensics team down here
233
00:08:42,306 --> 00:08:44,440
and fingerprint everything
and then get some DNA samples?
234
00:08:44,474 --> 00:08:45,741
Oh, sure.
235
00:08:45,742 --> 00:08:48,444
The Bones lady is
on her way over.
236
00:08:48,478 --> 00:08:51,147
It sounds like
you're being sarcastic.
237
00:08:51,181 --> 00:08:52,415
Not at all.
238
00:08:52,416 --> 00:08:53,816
Well, great. Good.
239
00:08:53,817 --> 00:08:56,185
How... so how long until you
track down these criminals?
240
00:08:56,186 --> 00:08:59,355
Well, once we get
the Bat-Signal in the sky,
241
00:08:59,356 --> 00:09:02,425
things move along
pretty quickly.
242
00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:03,959
See, that...
243
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,329
sounds like you're
being sarcastic again.
244
00:09:06,363 --> 00:09:08,364
But it's not.
245
00:09:12,369 --> 00:09:13,369
This is all
246
00:09:13,370 --> 00:09:16,539
your fault!
247
00:09:16,573 --> 00:09:18,908
Is it me or does he say that
248
00:09:18,909 --> 00:09:21,377
every time he walks in here?
249
00:09:21,411 --> 00:09:23,346
Don't talk to me
like we friends.
250
00:09:27,184 --> 00:09:28,951
All of my comics are gone!
251
00:09:28,952 --> 00:09:30,353
All of them
are gone!
252
00:09:30,387 --> 00:09:33,055
Stolen from the storage unit
that I had to put them in
253
00:09:33,056 --> 00:09:34,490
to keep them from you!
254
00:09:34,524 --> 00:09:36,459
Well, like
I always say,
255
00:09:36,460 --> 00:09:40,296
never put anything
anywhere.
256
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:42,498
Dad, those comics were
257
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:44,834
the one happy memory
I had from childhood.
258
00:09:44,835 --> 00:09:46,402
But you had to move in here
259
00:09:46,403 --> 00:09:48,504
and make sure that
even that was ruined, too.
260
00:09:48,538 --> 00:09:50,573
Ask Elizabeth Smart
about her childhood.
261
00:09:50,574 --> 00:09:51,574
See what she says.
262
00:09:55,712 --> 00:09:56,779
EDNA:
Mijo...
263
00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:59,548
I bring for you...
264
00:09:59,549 --> 00:10:02,451
because you lose
your Mickey Mice books.
265
00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:16,232
Is Xbox of Mexico.
266
00:10:20,470 --> 00:10:22,071
So they were just gone? Mm-hmm.
267
00:10:22,072 --> 00:10:24,173
God, Eli must be crushed.
Yeah.
268
00:10:24,207 --> 00:10:25,875
He cried.
269
00:10:25,909 --> 00:10:27,510
He did?
270
00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:28,677
Yeah.
271
00:10:28,678 --> 00:10:30,012
The first two minutes
were kind of cute,
272
00:10:30,013 --> 00:10:32,348
Then he got that
snot bubble thing...
273
00:10:33,583 --> 00:10:35,184
WARNER:
Oh, my God, Eli.
274
00:10:35,218 --> 00:10:36,452
I-I can't believe it.
275
00:10:36,453 --> 00:10:37,453
How are you dealing?
276
00:10:37,454 --> 00:10:39,455
I'm day to day.
277
00:10:42,292 --> 00:10:43,926
You know, I never really
cared about crime
278
00:10:43,927 --> 00:10:45,961
until it happened to me.
279
00:10:47,464 --> 00:10:50,866
Well, you-you know,
you're welcome to read my comics
280
00:10:50,867 --> 00:10:52,201
until they find yours.
281
00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:54,570
Really?
Yeah.
282
00:10:54,604 --> 00:10:55,938
Yeah, come on.
Okay.
283
00:10:55,939 --> 00:10:57,673
(grunts) Wow, you got a lot.
284
00:10:57,674 --> 00:10:59,241
Yeah.
That's a big box.
285
00:10:59,242 --> 00:11:00,509
(laughing)
286
00:11:00,510 --> 00:11:01,710
Oh. This is pretty good. Yeah.
287
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,279
Oh, I had this one.
288
00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:04,447
And this one.
289
00:11:04,448 --> 00:11:05,981
And this one...
290
00:11:05,982 --> 00:11:07,283
and this one...
291
00:11:07,284 --> 00:11:08,417
and this one.
292
00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:13,923
Warner...
293
00:11:13,924 --> 00:11:17,393
I think these might
be my comics.
294
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:20,062
(laughs)
295
00:11:21,398 --> 00:11:23,032
Wait, wait.
296
00:11:23,033 --> 00:11:27,336
My dad snuck into your storage
space and stole your comics?
297
00:11:27,370 --> 00:11:28,571
I don't...
298
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,606
He can't even get through
a revolving door
299
00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:32,141
without help from somebody.
(laughs)
300
00:11:35,812 --> 00:11:36,846
Dad...
Yeah?
301
00:11:36,847 --> 00:11:38,514
...what was the name
of the guy
302
00:11:38,515 --> 00:11:39,815
you bought these
from online?
303
00:11:39,816 --> 00:11:44,253
Oh, that was SlobberSausageNine@
lipsmacking.gov
304
00:11:44,287 --> 00:11:46,288
Yeah, he had those
in his trunk,
305
00:11:46,323 --> 00:11:49,492
along with cartons
of cigarettes and sneakers.
306
00:11:49,493 --> 00:11:52,428
In fact,
he sold me these.
307
00:11:52,429 --> 00:11:53,529
Adidos.
308
00:11:56,666 --> 00:11:59,201
Maybe they do belong to you.
309
00:11:59,236 --> 00:12:01,604
Thank you.
310
00:12:01,605 --> 00:12:02,638
Okay,
311
00:12:02,672 --> 00:12:08,844
if you are 100% sure
that these are yours...
312
00:12:08,845 --> 00:12:11,814
I-I can't take them.
I mean, they're...
313
00:12:11,848 --> 00:12:14,049
Well, I mean, I'm not 100%.
314
00:12:14,050 --> 00:12:18,020
They're in a different box
and they're out of order, so...
315
00:12:19,222 --> 00:12:20,656
Well, I can't take them
316
00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:22,124
if you're pretty sure
they're yours, so...
317
00:12:22,125 --> 00:12:23,125
Oh, well...
318
00:12:23,126 --> 00:12:24,393
I'm not...
319
00:12:25,428 --> 00:12:27,363
(laughs)
320
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,065
No, no, no, you don't.
321
00:12:30,066 --> 00:12:31,700
This is Jenna Lacy
all over again.
322
00:12:31,735 --> 00:12:34,370
Jenna Lacy? What does she have
to do with this?
323
00:12:34,404 --> 00:12:37,206
Oh, you don't remember?
Well, I wanted to ask her out,
324
00:12:37,207 --> 00:12:38,807
but I thought that you might
like her,
325
00:12:38,842 --> 00:12:40,209
and so I said,
"Hey, dude, are you
326
00:12:40,243 --> 00:12:41,744
gonna ask her out?"
327
00:12:41,745 --> 00:12:44,547
And you were like,
"No, I don't even like her."
328
00:12:44,581 --> 00:12:46,048
And so I asked her out,
329
00:12:46,049 --> 00:12:48,017
and it turned out
you did like her,
330
00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:50,252
and then you were all, like,
"Hey, I liked her.
331
00:12:50,253 --> 00:12:52,388
Why you asking her out?"
332
00:12:52,422 --> 00:12:54,823
Okay, I'm not gonna take 'em.
Just take 'em.
333
00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:56,191
No, no, I'm not gonna take 'em.
334
00:12:56,226 --> 00:12:57,493
No, I'm not gonna take 'em.
335
00:12:57,494 --> 00:12:58,827
Look, Warner, we've been friends
for 25 years.
336
00:12:58,862 --> 00:13:00,496
I want you to have them.
No, I can't do that.
337
00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:01,964
I'm not gonna take 'em.
338
00:13:01,965 --> 00:13:03,866
Yeah, oh, yeah.
No, don't. No.
339
00:13:04,968 --> 00:13:06,835
Take it. Take it.
340
00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:09,338
Take these.
Take these.
341
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:15,277
I hope you didn't handle
Jenna Lacy's box that way.
342
00:13:15,278 --> 00:13:18,213
I'll take 'em. If it'll make
you happy, I'll take 'em.
343
00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:22,851
I have those pants.
344
00:13:25,922 --> 00:13:28,424
I can't believe
he took them.
345
00:13:28,425 --> 00:13:31,627
Well, he did offer
them to you.
346
00:13:31,628 --> 00:13:33,362
Like I always say,
347
00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:35,130
always take everything.
348
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:38,534
Yeah, well, at least
349
00:13:38,568 --> 00:13:39,868
I didn't learn the difference
350
00:13:39,869 --> 00:13:41,236
between right and wrong
from you.
351
00:13:41,271 --> 00:13:43,806
Oh, yeah? Who'd you learn
it from, Superman?
352
00:13:44,841 --> 00:13:47,943
Yes. And Batman.
353
00:13:47,944 --> 00:13:49,044
And Wonder Woman.
354
00:13:49,045 --> 00:13:50,746
And Aquaman taught me
how to swim,
355
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,648
which is why I cannot swim.
356
00:13:56,086 --> 00:13:57,987
You can't swim?
357
00:13:58,021 --> 00:14:02,291
Boy, your mother really dropped
the ball on that one.
358
00:14:02,325 --> 00:14:06,328
Well, she was busy working
because you weren't around!
359
00:14:06,329 --> 00:14:10,132
God! At least my comic books
were there for me!
360
00:14:10,166 --> 00:14:12,601
At least I could swim!
361
00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:14,603
(door shuts)
362
00:14:19,843 --> 00:14:21,777
What?
363
00:14:24,681 --> 00:14:27,016
Okay, I'm a bad father
364
00:14:29,619 --> 00:14:32,488
And so he had to fill the void
365
00:14:32,489 --> 00:14:35,424
I left in his life
with comic books?
366
00:14:37,661 --> 00:14:39,662
What am I supposed
to do about it?
367
00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:46,201
Go to Warner's
and steal them back?
368
00:14:49,739 --> 00:14:52,408
Well, if you'd shut up
for five seconds,
369
00:14:52,409 --> 00:14:54,476
we could get out of here.
370
00:15:07,700 --> 00:15:09,301
Oh, boy,
371
00:15:09,335 --> 00:15:11,636
Warner's got some
fancy security system.
372
00:15:11,671 --> 00:15:15,407
It's okay, I have password.
373
00:15:22,915 --> 00:15:25,750
Is a good night to die.
374
00:15:29,789 --> 00:15:32,324
Edna, we're just getting
the comic books.
375
00:15:32,358 --> 00:15:34,159
We see how it goes.
376
00:15:49,142 --> 00:15:50,175
Psst!
377
00:15:50,209 --> 00:15:51,543
(hushed):
What are you doing?!
378
00:15:51,577 --> 00:15:53,778
Sorry. Habit!
379
00:15:55,047 --> 00:15:57,115
Edna, let's go upstairs.
380
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:03,488
All right, we got 'em.
Let's go.
381
00:16:03,489 --> 00:16:04,689
He has more.
382
00:16:06,759 --> 00:16:08,426
All right, all right.
383
00:16:17,637 --> 00:16:19,271
Uh!
384
00:16:22,008 --> 00:16:24,943
You do it wrong!
Est?pido, move!
385
00:16:36,122 --> 00:16:38,156
Andale!
386
00:16:42,261 --> 00:16:44,029
Mama...
387
00:16:45,698 --> 00:16:48,633
(sings Spanish lullaby)
388
00:16:58,511 --> 00:16:59,811
Buenas noches, ni?o.
389
00:17:15,861 --> 00:17:17,596
CAMILA:
Crawford?
390
00:17:23,569 --> 00:17:26,004
Anyone down here?
391
00:17:32,378 --> 00:17:34,212
(farts)
392
00:17:42,421 --> 00:17:44,089
(sighs)
393
00:17:47,093 --> 00:17:49,194
Whew! Got it.
394
00:17:53,165 --> 00:17:55,967
Okay, so walk me through
the sequence of events again.
395
00:17:56,002 --> 00:18:00,105
Okay, I heard a noise,
396
00:18:00,106 --> 00:18:03,408
I noticed my comics were gone,
I ran downstairs.
397
00:18:03,409 --> 00:18:05,977
It smelled really bad
right here.
398
00:18:09,215 --> 00:18:11,549
I ran outside and noticed
399
00:18:11,550 --> 00:18:13,551
that the security
system's wires were cut.
400
00:18:13,552 --> 00:18:14,551
(knocking)
401
00:18:14,553 --> 00:18:15,654
Hey.
Hey.
402
00:18:15,655 --> 00:18:16,888
I got your message.
Yeah.
403
00:18:16,922 --> 00:18:18,790
Wait a minute. I know you.
404
00:18:18,791 --> 00:18:21,660
I threw your file away
yesterday.
405
00:18:21,694 --> 00:18:25,230
I can't believe somebody broke
in here and stole my comics.
406
00:18:27,833 --> 00:18:30,201
Well, okay, I don't-I don't mean
to be awkward,
407
00:18:30,202 --> 00:18:33,204
but-but you gave 'em to me.
They're-They're my comics.
408
00:18:33,239 --> 00:18:36,141
Well, I mean,
you took them, yes,
409
00:18:36,142 --> 00:18:39,077
but I think we both know
that they are still mine.
410
00:18:41,314 --> 00:18:42,514
Wait a minute.
411
00:18:42,515 --> 00:18:44,249
I think I'm starting
to figure this out.
412
00:18:44,250 --> 00:18:47,252
My comics were the only thing
that were missing, and you
413
00:18:47,286 --> 00:18:50,021
are the only person
that knew they were here.
414
00:18:50,056 --> 00:18:53,158
You stole my comics.
You stole my comics!
415
00:18:53,159 --> 00:18:54,158
Thief!
416
00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:55,794
Arrest him!
417
00:18:57,430 --> 00:19:01,166
No, you are the one
that purchased stolen goods.
418
00:19:01,167 --> 00:19:02,467
So arrest him!
419
00:19:03,502 --> 00:19:06,171
I don't know.
He asked first.
420
00:19:06,172 --> 00:19:09,708
That's usually how
I decide who to arrest.
421
00:19:09,709 --> 00:19:12,143
I bet if we go over
to your apartment right now,
422
00:19:12,144 --> 00:19:13,478
you'll see the comics
right there.
423
00:19:13,479 --> 00:19:14,312
Oh, you do?
Yeah.
424
00:19:14,347 --> 00:19:15,547
How about that?
Yeah, yeah.
425
00:19:15,548 --> 00:19:16,815
Oh, that's great.
Be my guest.
426
00:19:16,816 --> 00:19:17,916
Okay. Aa!
Here we go.
427
00:19:17,917 --> 00:19:19,250
Uh...!
428
00:19:19,251 --> 00:19:20,952
You know, uh...
429
00:19:20,986 --> 00:19:23,722
that Morgan Freeman is
really terrific, isn't he?
430
00:19:34,300 --> 00:19:37,870
I swear to God, I have no idea
how these got here.
431
00:19:41,975 --> 00:19:43,108
Wait, wait, wait.
432
00:19:43,109 --> 00:19:46,045
He-He-He didn't steal
this nonsense.
433
00:19:46,046 --> 00:19:47,046
We did.
434
00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:49,581
What?
435
00:19:49,582 --> 00:19:51,517
You two care to explain
yourselves?
436
00:19:51,551 --> 00:19:53,719
She farted!
437
00:20:01,494 --> 00:20:04,363
Honey, that-that was you
on the landing?
438
00:20:06,900 --> 00:20:10,035
I, just, I never farted
in front of you before
439
00:20:10,036 --> 00:20:14,540
because I just wanted you
to keep thinking I was perfect.
440
00:20:15,842 --> 00:20:18,410
Well, that's over.
441
00:20:18,445 --> 00:20:20,279
I'm sorry.
442
00:20:20,313 --> 00:20:25,284
I, I never realized how much
you sacrifice for me.
443
00:20:27,921 --> 00:20:30,155
Don't squeeze her
too hard.
444
00:20:32,325 --> 00:20:35,227
Now that the Farty Boys have
solved the case
445
00:20:35,228 --> 00:20:36,662
of the mysterious smell,
446
00:20:36,663 --> 00:20:38,597
can we get back
to the matter at hand?
447
00:20:38,598 --> 00:20:40,933
Whose comics are these?
448
00:20:40,967 --> 00:20:43,735
All right, they're his.
449
00:20:43,770 --> 00:20:46,071
They're ours.
450
00:20:46,106 --> 00:20:47,172
Really?
451
00:20:47,207 --> 00:20:49,441
Yeah. Yeah.
452
00:20:49,442 --> 00:20:51,243
Officer, I'm not gonna press
charges.
453
00:20:51,277 --> 00:20:53,645
That was never
an option for you.
454
00:21:00,153 --> 00:21:02,521
Dad, you stole these for me.
455
00:21:02,522 --> 00:21:03,989
I don't know what to say.
456
00:21:04,023 --> 00:21:06,458
I do.
457
00:21:06,459 --> 00:21:09,628
I didn't realize these
ridiculous men in tights
458
00:21:09,629 --> 00:21:11,130
meant so much to you.
459
00:21:12,465 --> 00:21:16,135
I can see now
why you looked to them
460
00:21:16,136 --> 00:21:17,669
for some kind
of support.
461
00:21:17,670 --> 00:21:21,306
So now that I'm here,
maybe you'll think differently.
462
00:21:21,307 --> 00:21:22,975
I'm sorry, son.
463
00:21:25,044 --> 00:21:27,412
Uh,
464
00:21:27,413 --> 00:21:30,682
it's, like, the first time
I've heard you call me "son".
465
00:21:32,919 --> 00:21:35,821
You blanked on my name again,
didn't you?
466
00:21:41,194 --> 00:21:43,095
Come on. Let's get out of here.
467
00:21:43,096 --> 00:21:45,330
Ma'am, stop right there.
468
00:21:47,066 --> 00:21:48,734
I'm gonna walk ahead of you.
469
00:21:53,309 --> 00:21:59,269
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
470
00:21:59,319 --> 00:22:03,869
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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