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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,374 --> 00:00:10,410 Captioning made possible by a&e television networks 2 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:18,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 3 00:01:00,293 --> 00:01:02,462 can you get this on record? 4 00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:04,197 Yeah. 5 00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:06,366 Okay, good... any progress on getting the interview 6 00:01:06,366 --> 00:01:07,667 with the man himself? 7 00:01:07,667 --> 00:01:08,968 Ahem, the ambassador? 8 00:01:08,968 --> 00:01:10,703 No, Nero Wolfe, Nero Wolfe. 9 00:01:10,703 --> 00:01:12,005 Yeah, that would be a real feather in my hat. 10 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,740 Nero Wolfe, man, i'll tell ya, i'd have a by-line 11 00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,475 on the front page of every newspaper in the country. 12 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,210 (Leeson) Okay, kid, listen here. 13 00:01:17,644 --> 00:01:21,114 This is an experiment on how being in nature 14 00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:24,150 away from the secretaries 15 00:01:24,150 --> 00:01:26,319 the pens and paper, long tables 16 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,488 the formal diplomacy. 17 00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:30,223 How, perhaps, being in nature 18 00:01:30,223 --> 00:01:33,259 may actually, be able to change people's minds. 19 00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:37,163 You know, president eisenhower is actually considering using 20 00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:39,332 camp David as such a place. 21 00:01:41,067 --> 00:01:44,537 When i invited kelefy to come fish at my lodge, it, ah, 22 00:01:44,537 --> 00:01:46,706 never occurred to me i was gonna instigate 23 00:01:46,706 --> 00:01:48,441 some kind of an international incident. 24 00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:50,610 Then the state department got into it 25 00:01:51,044 --> 00:01:53,213 and the conglomerate lodged a complaint. 26 00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:57,550 My, my... a complaint! 27 00:01:57,550 --> 00:01:59,285 (kelefy) These people know 28 00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:01,888 that we have a very rich cache of oil in our country. 29 00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:04,057 Now, you know that oil is big money. 30 00:02:04,057 --> 00:02:07,093 You mine it cheaply, you sell it high. 31 00:02:07,527 --> 00:02:09,262 The only way to do that is to take it to other countries. 32 00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:10,997 (ferris) It's always brutal 33 00:02:10,997 --> 00:02:12,732 when you're talking about fuel. 34 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:16,636 A resource, oil, black gold. 35 00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:18,805 Everybody wants it. 36 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:21,407 (papps) In this country, the government meddles more 37 00:02:21,841 --> 00:02:24,010 in the affairs of, of businessmen. 38 00:02:24,010 --> 00:02:25,745 Whereas, ah, where we are, 39 00:02:25,745 --> 00:02:30,083 it is left up to the businessmen to really set things straight. 40 00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:13,408 (Archie goodwin) The new ambassador from vezenhuego 41 00:03:13,408 --> 00:03:16,062 and wanted to taste his famous brook trout. 42 00:03:16,062 --> 00:03:19,098 The state department wanted vezenhuego's oil 43 00:03:19,098 --> 00:03:20,833 and asked Wolfe for the favor. 44 00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:23,436 (man) Mr. Goodwin, i presume? 45 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:25,171 (Archie) Yes, yes, yes. 46 00:03:25,171 --> 00:03:26,039 (Archie) Yes, yes, yes. Do you do? 47 00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:27,774 Very good, thank you, very nice to meet you. 48 00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:29,943 (Wolfe) This is an abomination! 49 00:03:29,943 --> 00:03:31,678 Ah, mr. Wolfe... 50 00:03:31,678 --> 00:03:33,413 mr. Secretary, Leeson. 51 00:03:33,413 --> 00:03:34,714 I'm... 52 00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:38,184 Archie, i have lumbago and i will not... 53 00:03:38,618 --> 00:03:39,919 i will be dining in my room. 54 00:03:39,919 --> 00:03:41,654 That's a hell of a way to serve your country. 55 00:03:41,654 --> 00:03:43,823 You don't have lumbago, what it is, 56 00:03:43,823 --> 00:03:47,293 is we've driven 328 miles, your back is sore. 57 00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:49,462 From 35th street to the adirondacks, 58 00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:50,330 what do you expect... 59 00:03:50,763 --> 00:03:52,065 confound it, it's lumbago! 60 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:53,366 No, it's acute grumpiness... 61 00:03:53,366 --> 00:03:54,667 lumbago! 62 00:03:54,667 --> 00:03:56,836 20 years ago, Nero Wolfe got the papers 63 00:03:57,270 --> 00:03:58,571 that made him a u.s. Citizen. 64 00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:00,306 Who is this vezenhuego idiot? 65 00:04:00,306 --> 00:04:01,608 He'd always been grateful, 66 00:04:02,041 --> 00:04:03,343 so he agreed to cook for the ambassador 67 00:04:03,343 --> 00:04:05,078 and various american oil interests 68 00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:07,247 vying for the large oil contract. 69 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,548 Uh, hello. 70 00:04:08,548 --> 00:04:10,283 (Bragan) Ah, thank god, here they are. 71 00:04:10,283 --> 00:04:12,885 Come on in, mr. Wolfe, welcome to my humble abode! 72 00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:15,922 Very pleased to meet you, sir. 73 00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,091 I'd like you to meet the ambassador from vezenhuego, 74 00:04:18,524 --> 00:04:19,826 mr. Kelefy and his wife. 75 00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:21,127 It's a pleasure to meet you. 76 00:04:21,127 --> 00:04:22,428 I'm a great admirer of yours. 77 00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:24,163 (laughs) 78 00:04:24,163 --> 00:04:25,898 Dinner will be at 6:30. 79 00:04:25,898 --> 00:04:27,200 Where is my room? 80 00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:28,935 Your room's right along there. 81 00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,670 (clamoring) 82 00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:36,309 I have lumbago... i have it. 83 00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:39,345 And, now, i must eat at a strange table 84 00:04:39,345 --> 00:04:41,514 with a jumble of strangers 85 00:04:41,514 --> 00:04:45,852 in a nightmare, dime-store, frontier theme park 86 00:04:45,852 --> 00:04:50,623 filled with... bacteria-infested animals! 87 00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:55,395 So why don't you giddyup on down to the mess hall and tell them 88 00:04:55,395 --> 00:04:58,865 that i will not be chowing down with you this evening! 89 00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:01,034 Wolfe's real problem was aggravated laziness. 90 00:05:04,070 --> 00:05:06,239 Wolfe's real problem was aggravated laziness. & c hatter) 91 00:05:08,408 --> 00:05:09,275 When does it stop? 92 00:05:12,745 --> 00:05:14,480 Perhaps a little later on, after another cocktail. 93 00:05:17,083 --> 00:05:18,818 My wife is r 94 00:05:20,119 --> 00:05:22,288 (Archie) Why is that unfortunate? 95 00:05:22,288 --> 00:05:24,457 Because the ambassador, yesterday, caught only two. 96 00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:27,493 Tomorrow, i'm going to have a migraine not go fishing. 97 00:05:27,493 --> 00:05:30,096 David, we are getting a townhouse on jay street. 98 00:05:30,096 --> 00:05:31,831 My name is spiros papps. 99 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:34,000 I am here as advisor to my good friend, 100 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,169 cy, i am here as advisor theodore kelefyriend, en 101 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:39,639 who is the ambassador of vezenhuego. 102 00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:41,808 I am an expert and a financier. 103 00:05:42,241 --> 00:05:43,543 Tell me a little something about these people 104 00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:48,748 because the introductions, they were skimpy. 105 00:05:48,748 --> 00:05:51,784 David m. Leeson, assistant secretary of state. 106 00:05:51,784 --> 00:05:53,086 Oh, yeah, he called Wolfe. 107 00:05:53,086 --> 00:05:54,821 His influence with the ambassador 108 00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:56,989 makes him a linchpin to any deal. 109 00:05:56,989 --> 00:05:58,291 He's very close to the ambassador. 110 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,460 Oh, okay, what about her? 111 00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:03,062 Mrs. Sally Leeson, she is an asset to any career diplomat. 112 00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:05,231 She doesn't look like she's having a good time, 113 00:06:05,665 --> 00:06:06,966 i'll tell you that. 114 00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:09,135 She's a woman of many moods. 115 00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:10,436 What about that one over there? 116 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:12,171 That is adria kelefy, 117 00:06:12,171 --> 00:06:14,774 wife of the ambassador, a woman full of life. 118 00:06:14,774 --> 00:06:17,810 Sitting across from you there, james arthur ferris. 119 00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:19,545 He's gotta be somebody's lackey 120 00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:21,280 'cause he's sitting next to the fire, too, 121 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:22,582 he's burning up in the frying pan. 122 00:06:23,015 --> 00:06:24,317 No, as a matter of fact, he's a billionaire. 123 00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:26,486 This guy over here is a billionaire? 124 00:06:26,486 --> 00:06:29,522 They stick him next to the fire like me. 125 00:06:29,522 --> 00:06:31,257 He's the head of five oil syndicates. 126 00:06:31,691 --> 00:06:32,992 Wait a minute, wait a minute. 127 00:06:32,992 --> 00:06:35,161 Bragan invited the competition to go fishing? 128 00:06:35,161 --> 00:06:36,384 It was my idea to invite him. 129 00:06:36,384 --> 00:06:39,065 It was Bragan's idea to make him uncomfortable. 130 00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:42,969 I'm a man of malice, mr. Goodwin. 131 00:06:44,704 --> 00:06:46,873 I am a man of guile. 132 00:06:46,873 --> 00:06:49,475 (hysterical laughter) 133 00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,319 You're what? 134 00:07:02,054 --> 00:07:03,790 Ah, your excellency! 135 00:07:03,790 --> 00:07:07,260 Madame kelefy, as the host, 136 00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:10,730 it's my honor to propose the first toast. 137 00:07:10,730 --> 00:07:14,634 So, i would like to welcome our honored friends 138 00:07:15,067 --> 00:07:17,236 to the united states of america, 139 00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:18,971 the land of plenty. 140 00:07:19,405 --> 00:07:21,574 We are a marvelous machine, 141 00:07:21,574 --> 00:07:24,610 a machine that can feed the world. 142 00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:28,514 But, a machine that needs fuel to feed herself. 143 00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:30,683 And, so, we turn 144 00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:33,719 to the little countries, the backwaters, 145 00:07:33,719 --> 00:07:35,455 who have the resources 146 00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,190 but don't know what to do with them. 147 00:07:37,623 --> 00:07:39,358 And, to them, we offer a hand. 148 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:41,093 A hand, of course, 149 00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:45,431 that is filled with the benefits of civilization. 150 00:07:45,431 --> 00:07:49,335 Our technology, our medicine, our... 151 00:07:49,769 --> 00:07:51,938 jets, your planes, your tanks... 152 00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:54,540 and our indoor plumbing, mr. Ambassador, 153 00:07:54,540 --> 00:07:56,275 don't forget that. 154 00:07:56,275 --> 00:07:59,312 (all laughing) 155 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:03,216 (continues) But this exchange has but one goal: 156 00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:06,686 That you never forget that texas, 157 00:08:06,686 --> 00:08:10,590 united states of america, is your friend. 158 00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:14,494 So, ladies and gentlemen, my toast for this evening 159 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:20,132 is to a long and prosperous friendship, mr. Ambassador. 160 00:08:20,132 --> 00:08:21,868 (applause) 161 00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:23,603 I would like to say 162 00:08:23,603 --> 00:08:27,073 how beautiful my wife looks this evening. 163 00:08:27,073 --> 00:08:30,109 (applause) 164 00:08:30,543 --> 00:08:32,712 Absolutely, mr. Ambassador. 165 00:08:32,712 --> 00:08:34,013 Mr. Wolfe? 166 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,616 Oh, yes, beautiful. 167 00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:40,086 First, i would like to thank mr. O.v. Bragan 168 00:08:40,086 --> 00:08:43,556 for providing us with this haven, this oasis 169 00:08:43,556 --> 00:08:47,894 far away from my "backwater" country. 170 00:08:48,327 --> 00:08:49,629 (Bragan) My pleasure, sir. 171 00:08:49,629 --> 00:08:52,665 And far away from the chitchat of Washington. 172 00:08:52,665 --> 00:08:56,569 I would also like to thank my dearest David Leeson, 173 00:08:56,569 --> 00:09:00,907 for providing this magnificent adventure. 174 00:09:00,907 --> 00:09:02,642 And, without whom, 175 00:09:02,642 --> 00:09:06,112 i would never have fallen so in love with fly fishing. 176 00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:10,016 We are a people of beauty and passion and great love. 177 00:09:10,016 --> 00:09:14,787 And we pledge friendship, steadfast loyalty 178 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:18,257 and the pursuit of the american dream. 179 00:09:18,257 --> 00:09:19,992 (Bragan) Hear, hear! 180 00:09:19,992 --> 00:09:21,294 Well said, mr. Ambassador. 181 00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:23,896 Ferris, you can toast another time, when you host, maybe. 182 00:09:24,330 --> 00:09:28,234 (papps) I revel in it, seeing big men sharing bad blood. 183 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,969 Look at them. 184 00:09:29,969 --> 00:09:32,138 Too damn much hot air! 185 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:39,078 You know, there is nothing as petty as a big man. 186 00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:42,548 Little men are rarely as petty as big men... 187 00:09:42,982 --> 00:09:43,849 look at him. 188 00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:46,018 I mean, hot air! 189 00:09:49,488 --> 00:09:52,959 About your... your behavior during dinner. 190 00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:55,995 You know how i feel about disturbances at a meal. 191 00:09:55,995 --> 00:09:58,164 Yes, it was either that or i fry, so... 192 00:09:58,164 --> 00:10:00,333 i concede that this was an exception. 193 00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:02,935 This Bragan is either a dunce or a ruffian. 194 00:10:03,369 --> 00:10:05,538 So, are you going fishing tomorrow? 195 00:10:05,538 --> 00:10:06,839 No, i'm not going fishing. 196 00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,574 See any reason why i shouldn't? 197 00:10:09,008 --> 00:10:11,177 No, none that i caother than common sense. 198 00:10:11,177 --> 00:10:12,478 All right, well, good night. 199 00:10:12,478 --> 00:10:14,213 All right, well, good ndid you see these? 200 00:10:14,647 --> 00:10:19,418 Look, it's some sort of tribute to the myth of the frontier. 201 00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:20,720 Yeah, yeah... 202 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:24,624 Archie, you were right to oppose this expedition. 203 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,226 These people are engaged in bitter combat. 204 00:10:27,226 --> 00:10:29,829 In his present humor, 205 00:10:29,829 --> 00:10:32,431 i doubt if the ambassador could distinguish between 206 00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:35,468 truite bleu and carp fried in lard. 207 00:10:36,769 --> 00:10:38,504 Archie... 208 00:10:38,504 --> 00:10:41,107 if, uh... if we left tomorrow right after lunch, 209 00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:43,275 would we be home by bedtime? 210 00:10:43,275 --> 00:10:45,878 Ah, yeah, sure, sure... good night. 211 00:10:45,878 --> 00:10:47,179 Good night... Archie! 212 00:10:47,613 --> 00:10:48,914 What is this? 213 00:10:48,914 --> 00:10:51,083 Apinata. 214 00:10:53,252 --> 00:10:56,288 Archie, this, uh, other creature on my bed, 215 00:10:56,288 --> 00:10:57,590 could you remove this? 216 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:59,325 I doubt i could sleep with it. 217 00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,398 Are you going to sleep? 218 00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:07,133 Yes, i'll sleep, normally, i do. 219 00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:11,470 I'm gonna play a little pool first, though. 220 00:11:13,205 --> 00:11:14,507 You must keep your mind on business. 221 00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,242 You were talking entirely too much at dinner. 222 00:11:16,242 --> 00:11:17,977 Now, we have things to do here. 223 00:11:17,977 --> 00:11:19,712 We must do them quickly and efficiently. 224 00:11:20,146 --> 00:11:21,881 I will not have you embarrass me one more time, 225 00:11:21,881 --> 00:11:23,182 you understand me? 226 00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:24,917 As i came down the stairs, i noticed papps 227 00:11:24,917 --> 00:11:27,520 had left a few details out of his introductions. 228 00:11:27,953 --> 00:11:30,122 Last night, he saw the light. 229 00:11:30,122 --> 00:11:32,291 Let me tely home 230 00:11:32,291 --> 00:11:34,460 and you, sir, are my guest. 231 00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:37,930 Oh, for god's sake, don't pull that great man act on me. 232 00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:39,665 If i were you, i'd be worried about papps. 233 00:11:39,665 --> 00:11:41,834 He's not the kind of man who stays bought. 234 00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:43,569 Hey, you waiting for your cue? 235 00:11:43,569 --> 00:11:44,870 What a fool. 236 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,605 Who, uh, ferris? 237 00:11:46,605 --> 00:11:48,340 I honestly thought the americans would pull together. 238 00:11:48,340 --> 00:11:50,509 Instead, they could sink the negotiations. 239 00:11:50,509 --> 00:11:52,244 There's other people that want that oil, y'know. 240 00:11:52,244 --> 00:11:53,979 Well, listen, tomorrow's another day 241 00:11:53,979 --> 00:11:56,148 and you'll be tasting Wolfe's cooking. 242 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,390 All right, everybody, gather round. 243 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,125 Ladies and gentlemen, 244 00:12:06,125 --> 00:12:08,728 boys and girls, come on, kids, come on. 245 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,896 Put that cue down, come on over here! 246 00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:12,631 Come on, you ladies, ladies, come on in! 247 00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:13,933 Now, then. 248 00:12:16,969 --> 00:12:19,138 (mariachi music) 249 00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:20,873 Let's hear it, come on! 250 00:12:20,873 --> 00:12:23,042 (cheering) 251 00:12:23,042 --> 00:12:25,211 Bring on the dancing girls! 252 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:27,379 (cheering & yelling) 253 00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:14,660 (cheering) 254 00:14:36,208 --> 00:14:38,377 (chatter) 255 00:14:50,956 --> 00:14:52,691 (Archie) There were a lot of twists and turns 256 00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:55,294 in the three miles of river that Bragan owned. 257 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:59,198 Bragan and kelefy had the two sections north of the lodge 258 00:14:59,198 --> 00:15:01,800 and Leeson and ferris were working the two south bends. 259 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,837 If papps developed the headache he was planning on, 260 00:15:04,837 --> 00:15:07,439 i planned to take his stretch in the middle. 261 00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,237 Good day, everyone. 262 00:15:38,237 --> 00:15:40,839 Ah, yes. 263 00:15:40,839 --> 00:15:42,574 Feeling better today? 264 00:15:42,574 --> 00:15:44,310 No, the pain, the pain. 265 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,045 His promise of a migraine 266 00:15:46,045 --> 00:15:47,780 so his boss could catch a few more fish. 267 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,081 Wish me luck! 268 00:16:02,094 --> 00:16:03,829 Do you see the sheen? Yes. 269 00:16:03,829 --> 00:16:06,432 Wolfe kept his mind off lumbago by prepping for the trout. 270 00:16:06,865 --> 00:16:11,203 Where all of the essences form to make this genius dish. 271 00:16:14,239 --> 00:16:15,541 Here, taste. 272 00:16:21,613 --> 00:16:22,915 Salt. 273 00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:25,084 It needs salt, ha-ha! 274 00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:27,252 Wh... what did you say? 275 00:16:27,252 --> 00:16:28,988 And a bit of onion, where's the onion? 276 00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:30,723 Onion! 277 00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:32,458 Wh... what... you would destroy 278 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:34,626 th... the delicate taste of trout with onion! 279 00:16:34,626 --> 00:16:35,928 It's a joke, it's a joke... 280 00:16:35,928 --> 00:16:37,229 ! 281 00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:38,964 It's absolutely perfect, it's a joke. 282 00:16:38,964 --> 00:16:40,265 You call yourself a chef? 283 00:16:40,699 --> 00:16:42,868 You make a joke in the middle of proofing a sauce! 284 00:16:42,868 --> 00:16:45,471 You know w witling. 285 00:16:45,471 --> 00:16:48,073 Bragan told me, not very cordially, 286 00:16:48,073 --> 00:16:49,375 to help myself to supplies. 287 00:16:49,808 --> 00:16:52,845 Well, i ended up with a walton special three-piece rod, 288 00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,146 a poughqueag reel, 289 00:16:54,146 --> 00:16:55,881 a fly box with two dozen assorted flies. 290 00:16:55,881 --> 00:16:59,351 I estimated that i was about $400 on the hoof. 291 00:16:59,351 --> 00:17:01,520 It was 10:30 wher. 292 00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:04,556 I wanted to work the section set aside for papps 293 00:17:04,556 --> 00:17:05,858 until the rest came back. 294 00:17:06,291 --> 00:17:08,384 Then i'd have the river all to myself. 295 00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:15,360 Will you catch one for lunch, a fish? 296 00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:17,136 If it's big enough to keep, i will. 297 00:17:17,569 --> 00:17:19,738 What is the biggest fish you ever caught? 298 00:17:19,738 --> 00:17:21,473 The biggest fish i ever caught? 299 00:17:21,473 --> 00:17:24,510 That'd have to be frankie "the shark" d'angelo. 300 00:17:24,510 --> 00:17:27,112 Was he difficult to catch? 301 00:17:27,112 --> 00:17:28,847 Yes, he put up quite a struggle. 302 00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:31,450 Now let me try, i want to... 303 00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:33,619 ah, no no no, no no. 304 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:35,354 It'd be fun to watch you catch a fish 305 00:17:35,354 --> 00:17:37,956 but, see, Bragan lent this to me and, ah, 306 00:17:37,956 --> 00:17:39,258 but, see, Bragan lent i can't give it to you. 307 00:17:39,258 --> 00:17:40,559 Now, you still smoke? 308 00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,728 I do, occasionally, not... oh, pink! 309 00:17:43,162 --> 00:17:44,463 Pink, yes. 310 00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:45,696 Pink, my favorite color. 311 00:17:45,696 --> 00:17:47,066 How could i forget pink? 312 00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:48,801 I just want to catch a fish, why is that wrong? 313 00:17:48,801 --> 00:17:50,969 This is not my gear, all right? 314 00:17:50,969 --> 00:17:52,271 Bragan, he lent it to me 315 00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:53,572 so there's certain rule. 316 00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:55,307 Now, listen, i'm sorry. 317 00:17:55,307 --> 00:17:57,042 And i'll show you how sorry i am. 318 00:17:57,042 --> 00:18:00,079 I will tell you my first thought when i saw you last evening... 319 00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,115 if you'd care to hear it, would you? 320 00:18:03,115 --> 00:18:03,982 I'm not sure. 321 00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:07,019 Oh, look at her, she's at it again. 322 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:09,188 Unbelievable. 323 00:18:09,188 --> 00:18:11,790 You know, she will never change. 324 00:18:12,224 --> 00:18:14,393 Come, you still play backgammon? 325 00:18:14,393 --> 00:18:17,429 That big ring on your husband's left hand, is it an emerald? 326 00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:18,730 Se. Our 327 00:18:18,730 --> 00:18:20,466 so this is what i was thinking, i was thinking that 328 00:18:20,899 --> 00:18:22,201 your husband, he ought to display his assets 329 00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:23,502 a little bit more effectively. 330 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:25,237 Oh, yeah? How? 331 00:18:25,237 --> 00:18:27,840 Well, by combining his assets you and the emerald, you see. 332 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,008 See, what i would do is, i would take the emerald 333 00:18:30,008 --> 00:18:31,310 and i would turn it into an earring 334 00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:32,611 and i would put it in your right ear. 335 00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:34,780 Your left ear... 336 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:36,515 what would i do with 337 00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:38,684 i'm not sure. 338 00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:42,154 Anyway, that's what i would do with your right ear. 339 00:18:42,154 --> 00:18:45,190 Like it, i like pearls. 340 00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:50,395 Now give me that rod. 341 00:18:50,395 --> 00:18:52,131 Good morning, mrs. Kelefy. 342 00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:54,299 Hard at work, mr. Goodwin? 343 00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,601 Indeed. 344 00:18:55,601 --> 00:18:57,336 I just wanted to catch a fish 345 00:18:57,336 --> 00:18:59,505 and this man won't give me his rod, let me use your rod. 346 00:18:59,505 --> 00:19:01,240 Do you know how to use it? 347 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:02,975 It takes a certain expertise. 348 00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:04,710 It's all in the wrist, when you cast. 349 00:19:04,710 --> 00:19:06,879 Now, how can i help you today, mr. Ferris? 350 00:19:06,879 --> 00:19:08,180 I'm not sure. 351 00:19:08,614 --> 00:19:09,915 I don't know what you're doing in this kitchen! 352 00:19:10,349 --> 00:19:11,650 (yelling) 353 00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:13,312 It's full of bacteria! 354 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:18,157 How dare you say a thing like that! 355 00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:21,627 Diiingg, diiingg, diiingg! 356 00:19:22,060 --> 00:19:23,362 Diiingg! 357 00:19:23,362 --> 00:19:24,663 Don't terrify my people here! 358 00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:26,398 I asked you to julienne these! 359 00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:28,133 That is julienne! 360 00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:29,001 It is not julienne! 361 00:19:29,434 --> 00:19:30,736 It is julienne according to the french! 362 00:19:30,736 --> 00:19:32,471 I don't care what the french think! 363 00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:45,918 Ahh... mr. Goodwin. 364 00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:47,653 You're fishing, too. 365 00:19:50,255 --> 00:19:51,557 Eight trout. 366 00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:53,292 Ah, very nice. 367 00:19:53,292 --> 00:19:56,328 I ran into Bragan, he has had the audacity to catch 12. 368 00:19:56,328 --> 00:19:59,364 That is no way to win an oil contract. 369 00:19:59,364 --> 00:20:01,533 I mu?? Get back and show my wife. 370 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,268 She's out fishing right now. 371 00:20:03,268 --> 00:20:06,738 You think she's caught something? 372 00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:08,473 She had hook in a big one. 373 00:20:08,473 --> 00:20:11,076 I must go and show my fish. 374 00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:16,281 I'll see you at lunch! 375 00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:33,198 Hoit, hoit. 376 00:20:33,632 --> 00:20:34,933 Let's go, gentlemen, 377 00:20:34,933 --> 00:20:36,668 every second affects the texture of the flesh. 378 00:20:37,102 --> 00:20:39,271 I'd only caught three fish when i started Leeson's stretch. 379 00:20:39,705 --> 00:20:41,440 Then i got a hit that almost pulled me over. 380 00:20:41,873 --> 00:20:43,175 I couldn't believe it. 381 00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:45,344 This was the grandpa of all trout. 382 00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:50,115 (papps) Look at, beautiful! 383 00:20:50,115 --> 00:20:52,718 That is magnificent! 384 00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:07,466 Mr. Wolfe! 385 00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:10,502 We wish to offer you the praise that you so lavish... 386 00:21:10,502 --> 00:21:11,803 where is he? 387 00:21:12,096 --> 00:21:13,972 He's gone to pack. 388 00:21:14,406 --> 00:21:16,141 Good god! 389 00:21:16,141 --> 00:21:18,744 Thankgod. 390 00:22:08,627 --> 00:22:10,796 (Bragan) Goodwin, did you see secretary Leeson? 391 00:22:10,796 --> 00:22:11,663 No, sir. 392 00:22:12,097 --> 00:22:13,398 So unlike him. 393 00:22:13,398 --> 00:22:15,567 He probably just wanted to fill up his creel. 394 00:22:15,567 --> 00:22:18,603 You always exaggerate about how many fish you catch. 395 00:22:19,037 --> 00:22:20,339 I got to give you a little report here. 396 00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,074 See, i want you to know before the others. 397 00:22:22,074 --> 00:22:25,110 I just found secretary Leeson downstream, clobbered. 398 00:22:25,110 --> 00:22:26,411 Good heavens. 399 00:22:26,411 --> 00:22:28,146 His skull is... are you listening? 400 00:22:28,146 --> 00:22:30,315 His skull is bashed in above the temple. 401 00:22:30,315 --> 00:22:32,484 His armpits are cold as can be. 402 00:22:32,484 --> 00:22:34,219 Maybe we should go. He's dead. 403 00:22:34,653 --> 00:22:35,954 Perhaps we should leave. 404 00:22:35,954 --> 00:22:38,123 We wouldn't get past albany. 405 00:22:45,931 --> 00:22:48,100 Why the devil did you have to go fishing! 406 00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:50,702 I decided that more proper attire 407 00:22:50,702 --> 00:22:52,437 would be needed to break the news. 408 00:22:54,172 --> 00:22:55,474 Mrs. Leeson, i regret to inform you 409 00:22:55,907 --> 00:22:57,642 that secretary Leeson has been found down... 410 00:22:57,642 --> 00:23:00,245 (screaming) 411 00:23:00,245 --> 00:23:02,414 If you have to, i will take you there. 412 00:23:02,414 --> 00:23:05,884 Mr. Bragan, i need you to call the police and a doctor now. 413 00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:11,957 (man) You put a handkerchief under the dead man's head? 414 00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:13,258 Yes, i did. 415 00:23:13,258 --> 00:23:14,559 Very sensible. 416 00:23:14,559 --> 00:23:16,728 I'll get a better look at him in the hospital. 417 00:23:18,463 --> 00:23:20,198 David! 418 00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:21,933 You, smart guy. 419 00:23:21,933 --> 00:23:23,235 Inside. 420 00:23:33,211 --> 00:23:34,946 I understand that the ambassador 421 00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:37,983 and mrs. Kelefy and mr. Papps have diplomatic immunity 422 00:23:37,983 --> 00:23:39,718 and therefore don't have to... 423 00:23:39,718 --> 00:23:42,320 no, no, we would be very happy to cooperate. 424 00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:44,489 I mean, even diplomats can be human on occasion. 425 00:23:44,923 --> 00:23:47,526 On behalf of the people of the state of new york, 426 00:23:47,526 --> 00:23:48,827 i thank you, sir. 427 00:23:48,827 --> 00:23:51,430 Now, according to your statements, 428 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:53,088 you all have alibis. 429 00:23:53,088 --> 00:23:55,767 Those of you who were here in the lodge have witnesses. 430 00:23:56,201 --> 00:23:58,804 Those of you who were down in the river have fish... 431 00:23:58,804 --> 00:24:00,972 i caught 12 trout! 432 00:24:01,406 --> 00:24:04,876 That takes time, even if they're biting. 433 00:24:04,876 --> 00:24:07,045 Yes, and mr. Ferris caught 10 434 00:24:07,045 --> 00:24:08,780 and ambassador kelefy caught eight. 435 00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:10,949 I mentioned i've been bothered by poachers 436 00:24:10,949 --> 00:24:12,684 have you investigated that angle? 437 00:24:12,684 --> 00:24:14,419 Well, l... why not?! 438 00:24:14,419 --> 00:24:17,889 Because i guess we... oh, nate, just bring it here. 439 00:24:20,926 --> 00:24:23,094 I, uh, i wrapped it in newspaper. 440 00:24:25,263 --> 00:24:27,866 Now, this was found 500 feet downstream from the bend, 441 00:24:27,866 --> 00:24:29,601 wedged between two rocks. 442 00:24:29,601 --> 00:24:30,902 (screaming) 443 00:24:30,902 --> 00:24:32,204 No, no, don't look, don't look. 444 00:24:32,637 --> 00:24:35,240 I'm sorry, but this was necessary. 445 00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,843 As you can see, it's been sawed off at both ends 446 00:24:37,843 --> 00:24:39,578 and it wasn't in the water long enough 447 00:24:39,578 --> 00:24:40,879 to wash away the blood stains. 448 00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:42,180 (Bragan) Of course! 449 00:24:42,180 --> 00:24:45,217 Poacher picked up a branch and... crrk! 450 00:24:45,217 --> 00:24:47,385 There's pieces of wood like that in the wood pile. 451 00:24:47,819 --> 00:24:49,554 If this was sawed off at both ends 452 00:24:49,554 --> 00:24:50,856 it means it was premeditated. 453 00:24:50,856 --> 00:24:52,157 I'd have to agree. 454 00:24:52,591 --> 00:24:54,326 (Bragan) Find the poacher, man! 455 00:24:54,326 --> 00:24:55,627 What are you wasting our time for? 456 00:24:55,627 --> 00:24:58,230 Well, sir, because we've come to a conclusion. 457 00:24:58,663 --> 00:25:02,133 We don't like it, we don't like it at all, but... 458 00:25:02,133 --> 00:25:04,736 a duty is a duty, no matter how painful. 459 00:25:04,736 --> 00:25:06,037 What conclusion? 460 00:25:06,471 --> 00:25:09,074 The perpetrator of the murder is somebody in this lodge. 461 00:25:09,074 --> 00:25:10,375 Now listen here, 462 00:25:10,809 --> 00:25:12,978 my little good captain colvin! 463 00:25:12,978 --> 00:25:15,580 Do you know who my guests are? 464 00:25:15,580 --> 00:25:17,315 I certainly do. 465 00:25:17,315 --> 00:25:19,484 There was an article in the newspaper yesterday 466 00:25:19,484 --> 00:25:22,087 and a dispatch at headquarters from washington. 467 00:25:22,087 --> 00:25:25,557 Might help to know what state the negotiations have reached. 468 00:25:25,991 --> 00:25:27,726 You're out of your depth, colvin. 469 00:25:27,726 --> 00:25:29,027 You certainly are. 470 00:25:29,461 --> 00:25:31,196 The article mentioned there was a rivalry 471 00:25:31,196 --> 00:25:32,497 between you and mr. Ferris, 472 00:25:32,931 --> 00:25:34,666 they said it was intense and bitter. 473 00:25:35,100 --> 00:25:37,702 I assume that's a guess you're making, sergeant. 474 00:25:38,136 --> 00:25:41,606 Americans do not fight with clubs, not for millions. 475 00:25:41,606 --> 00:25:44,209 Anybsneaked through the woods 476 00:25:44,209 --> 00:25:46,378 and cked up a stick from that wood pile. 477 00:25:46,378 --> 00:25:50,282 Yes, yes, but the laws of probability 478 00:25:50,282 --> 00:25:52,450 force us to focus on the people here. 479 00:25:52,450 --> 00:25:54,619 Not just you, gentlemen. 480 00:25:54,619 --> 00:25:58,089 We have Archie goodwin, and Nero Wolfe. 481 00:25:58,089 --> 00:26:02,427 According to the same article, you came here to cook trout? 482 00:26:02,427 --> 00:26:04,596 I was asked to serve my country. 483 00:26:04,596 --> 00:26:07,198 Baloney, what's the real reason? 484 00:26:07,632 --> 00:26:09,801 Oh, don't spoil it, mr. Colvin. 485 00:26:09,801 --> 00:26:11,970 Answer the question, why are you here? 486 00:26:12,404 --> 00:26:15,006 You have hinted delicately at a connection between 487 00:26:15,006 --> 00:26:18,476 the death of secretary Leeson and this contest of oil rights. 488 00:26:18,476 --> 00:26:22,380 The one notable incident i would add to my statement is that 489 00:26:22,814 --> 00:26:25,417 last night mr. Bragan arranged the seating at the table 490 00:26:25,850 --> 00:26:26,718 so that mr. Ferris and mr. Goodwin 491 00:26:27,152 --> 00:26:28,887 were roasted before our eyes. 492 00:26:29,184 --> 00:26:31,923 Their only choice was cremation or discourtesy. 493 00:26:31,923 --> 00:26:33,658 Are you through? Did you listen? 494 00:26:33,658 --> 00:26:35,393 Yes, brilliant, case solved. 495 00:26:35,393 --> 00:26:40,599 Now, at what time did you and mr. Goodwin have breakfast? 496 00:26:40,599 --> 00:26:42,334 I had mine early. 497 00:26:42,767 --> 00:26:44,936 Mr. Goodwin had his at 9:30. 498 00:26:45,370 --> 00:26:46,237 Ah-ha! 499 00:26:46,671 --> 00:26:47,973 Is this significant? 500 00:26:47,973 --> 00:26:50,141 Plenty of time for goodwin to slip down to the river, 501 00:26:50,141 --> 00:26:54,045 kill mr. Leeson and establish himself back on the veranda. 502 00:26:54,045 --> 00:26:57,949 Wild conjectures have their place in an investigation, sir 503 00:26:57,949 --> 00:27:00,118 but it is better not to blab them 504 00:27:00,118 --> 00:27:04,456 until they are supported by at least a slender thread of fact. 505 00:27:04,456 --> 00:27:07,492 Your being here stinks to high heaven. 506 00:27:07,492 --> 00:27:09,152 Now what was the real reason? 507 00:27:09,152 --> 00:27:11,830 And don't give me any guff about trout. 508 00:27:11,830 --> 00:27:14,866 Let us be explicit, do you call me a liar? 509 00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:16,601 I do. 510 00:27:16,601 --> 00:27:18,336 Then there's no point in going on. 511 00:27:18,336 --> 00:27:19,638 I'm not through with you. 512 00:27:19,638 --> 00:27:21,373 Your statement, it's absolutely complete? 513 00:27:21,806 --> 00:27:22,674 Yes. 514 00:27:23,108 --> 00:27:24,843 Theryou didn't mention? 515 00:27:25,276 --> 00:27:26,144 No. 516 00:27:26,144 --> 00:27:28,313 Nothing notable? No. 517 00:27:28,747 --> 00:27:30,915 You don't find it notable that you came here 518 00:27:30,915 --> 00:27:32,651 to cook the ambassador's trout... 519 00:27:33,084 --> 00:27:35,253 that's what you say you came here for, right? 520 00:27:35,253 --> 00:27:36,554 Yes. 521 00:27:36,554 --> 00:27:40,458 And yet, according to the cook, when you did cook the fish, 522 00:27:40,458 --> 00:27:42,193 you didn't include the ambassador's. 523 00:27:42,627 --> 00:27:44,362 You don't find that notable? 524 00:27:44,362 --> 00:27:45,664 Not especially, no. 525 00:27:46,097 --> 00:27:47,399 Well, i do! 526 00:27:47,399 --> 00:27:48,700 I looked at those fish, 527 00:27:49,134 --> 00:27:50,435 there's nothing wrong with them that i can see. 528 00:27:50,435 --> 00:27:53,905 Ambassador kelefy, did you know that he didn't cook your fish? 529 00:27:53,905 --> 00:27:56,508 No, i did not, this is rather a surprise. 530 00:27:56,508 --> 00:27:59,544 Can you think of any reason why not? 531 00:27:59,544 --> 00:28:03,014 I'm afraid not, but no doubt mr. Wolfe can supply one. 532 00:28:03,014 --> 00:28:05,536 Well, what about it, Wolfe... why? 533 00:28:07,786 --> 00:28:09,954 Relate it to the murder, mr. Colvin. 534 00:28:09,954 --> 00:28:11,690 I don't have to. 535 00:28:11,690 --> 00:28:14,726 Well, the trout are here, scrutinize them, 536 00:28:14,726 --> 00:28:16,461 dissect them, send them to the laboratory. 537 00:28:16,895 --> 00:28:19,931 You can conduct a simple examination. 538 00:28:19,931 --> 00:28:22,967 I don't believe your story, Wolfe. 539 00:28:26,004 --> 00:28:29,908 I resent your tone, your diction, 540 00:28:29,908 --> 00:28:32,077 your manners and your methods! 541 00:28:32,510 --> 00:28:36,414 Only a witling would call a man of my conceit a liar. 542 00:28:36,414 --> 00:28:37,716 Come, Archie. 543 00:28:37,716 --> 00:28:39,884 (phone ringing) 544 00:28:39,884 --> 00:28:42,053 Captain colvin. 545 00:28:42,053 --> 00:28:43,680 Very nice, mr. Wolfe. 546 00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:45,523 Yes, sir, how are you... 547 00:28:45,523 --> 00:28:47,692 yes, sir. 548 00:28:47,692 --> 00:28:50,729 Yes, sir, i will, thank you, sir. 549 00:28:53,331 --> 00:28:55,066 That was district attorney howard jessel. 550 00:28:55,500 --> 00:28:57,669 He's arriving here at 5:00. 551 00:28:58,103 --> 00:28:59,838 He doesn't want me to ask any more questions 552 00:28:59,838 --> 00:29:01,573 gets here. He doesn't want me to ask any more questionstil he 553 00:29:01,573 --> 00:29:03,308 (Wolfe) Answer the door. 554 00:29:03,308 --> 00:29:04,175 There's nobody at the door. 555 00:29:04,609 --> 00:29:05,477 There is a shadow. 556 00:29:05,477 --> 00:29:07,212 Wolfe, i want to talk to you about something. 557 00:29:07,645 --> 00:29:09,380 Mr. Bragan, don't stand on ceremony. 558 00:29:09,380 --> 00:29:11,116 Indeed, don't stand at all. 559 00:29:11,116 --> 00:29:13,284 It disconcerts me to look up at people. 560 00:29:13,284 --> 00:29:15,019 Look, i like the way you handled colvin. 561 00:29:15,019 --> 00:29:16,755 I didn't, i want to go home. 562 00:29:17,188 --> 00:29:19,791 Should have toadied him, i didn't, vanity comes high. Home. I 563 00:29:20,225 --> 00:29:21,092 well, he's a fool! 564 00:29:21,092 --> 00:29:24,129 The idea that anyone murdered Leeson is absurd. 565 00:29:24,129 --> 00:29:26,731 Not any more absurd than the idea of a poacher 566 00:29:26,731 --> 00:29:29,334 selecting a log, then... would you please sit down?! 567 00:29:29,768 --> 00:29:32,370 All right, maybe it wasn't a poacher. 568 00:29:32,370 --> 00:29:34,105 Wolfe, i want you to find who killed Leeson 569 00:29:34,105 --> 00:29:35,744 and i want you to do it damn quickly! 570 00:29:36,274 --> 00:29:38,009 I can't emphasize how quickly. 571 00:29:38,009 --> 00:29:39,744 This must be cleared up! 572 00:29:39,744 --> 00:29:42,347 Leeson murdered in my lodge... 573 00:29:42,347 --> 00:29:44,949 the state department might decide to freeze me out. 574 00:29:44,949 --> 00:29:46,251 Name your price. 575 00:29:46,251 --> 00:29:47,552 I think not. 576 00:29:47,552 --> 00:29:49,287 If i have a word with the district attorney, 577 00:29:49,287 --> 00:29:51,022 he'll take your statement and let you go back to new york. 578 00:29:51,456 --> 00:29:52,757 No. Mean, no? U 579 00:29:54,492 --> 00:29:55,794 the hell with appeal 580 00:29:55,794 --> 00:29:57,095 i have a reason. What is it? 581 00:29:57,095 --> 00:29:58,830 I do not wish to disclose it. 582 00:29:58,830 --> 00:30:01,432 Mr. Bragan, you're an overbearing man, 583 00:30:01,432 --> 00:30:02,734 but i am a dogged one. 584 00:30:03,168 --> 00:30:04,903 While i owe you the courtesy of a guest, 585 00:30:05,336 --> 00:30:08,807 i owe you nothing more, i decline the job. 586 00:30:08,807 --> 00:30:10,542 (knocking) 587 00:30:10,542 --> 00:30:11,843 Come in! 588 00:30:11,843 --> 00:30:13,578 What do you want, ferris? 589 00:30:13,578 --> 00:30:15,313 Ho, ho, well, well, Bragan. 590 00:30:15,313 --> 00:30:18,783 I'm glad you're here, i have something i want to say to you 591 00:30:18,783 --> 00:30:20,084 and i want witnesses present. 592 00:30:20,518 --> 00:30:22,253 For god's sakes, ferris, there's been a murder. 593 00:30:22,253 --> 00:30:24,422 Tomorrow, it'll be on the front page of a thousand papers 594 00:30:26,591 --> 00:30:28,326 tomorrow, i'm going to go to the district attorney 595 00:30:28,326 --> 00:30:29,627 and tell him the truth. 596 00:30:29,627 --> 00:30:30,929 Congratulations. 597 00:30:30,929 --> 00:30:33,531 About how you had a man in paris working on kelefy. 598 00:30:33,531 --> 00:30:35,700 And a woman working on mrs. Kelefy. 599 00:30:35,700 --> 00:30:37,869 And how you put the screws to Leeson 600 00:30:37,869 --> 00:30:40,038 with some sort of blackmail. 601 00:30:42,207 --> 00:30:46,110 You better watch what you say, mr. Ferris. 602 00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:50,882 As you say, there are witnesses. 603 00:30:50,882 --> 00:30:56,087 You thought your dirty scheme was all set, didn't you? 604 00:30:56,521 --> 00:30:58,256 You had Leeson eating out of 605 00:30:58,256 --> 00:30:59,991 the palms of your hands, didn't you? 606 00:30:59,991 --> 00:31:03,027 Ha, ha, oh no, he started talking to me 607 00:31:03,027 --> 00:31:05,196 and he began to see the light. 608 00:31:08,233 --> 00:31:09,968 I needed just one more day. 609 00:31:09,968 --> 00:31:14,305 One more day to close but that day's come. 610 00:31:14,305 --> 00:31:17,775 And Leeson's no longer here. 611 00:31:21,679 --> 00:31:26,017 By god, you bought papps back, didn't you? 612 00:31:26,017 --> 00:31:27,318 You got it. 613 00:31:27,318 --> 00:31:29,487 (laughing) 614 00:31:32,523 --> 00:31:34,259 Let go my arm. 615 00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:42,500 Look, sally... spiros, go away. 616 00:31:42,934 --> 00:31:45,536 Can't you just leave me alone? 617 00:31:45,536 --> 00:31:47,272 But, you shouldn't be alone... 618 00:31:47,705 --> 00:31:49,376 and you've come to comfort me? 619 00:31:49,376 --> 00:31:50,742 If i can. 620 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:52,477 Or to save your precious deal? 621 00:31:53,778 --> 00:31:58,116 Look, sally... don't you dare! 622 00:31:58,116 --> 00:31:59,851 He trusted you. 623 00:32:01,586 --> 00:32:03,755 (Wolfe) Pleistocene, saber-toothed hyenas 624 00:32:04,188 --> 00:32:05,924 hungry for each other's flesh. 625 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:07,225 Uh, yeah, yeah, right, i agree. 626 00:32:07,225 --> 00:32:08,526 Listen, i think you missed a bet there, see. 627 00:32:08,526 --> 00:32:10,695 If Bragan had talked the district attorney 628 00:32:10,695 --> 00:32:12,864 into letting us go, we'd be home in seven hours. 629 00:32:12,864 --> 00:32:15,466 Archie, i'm taking another bath. 630 00:32:15,466 --> 00:32:17,635 Yeah, fine, but you know, the fastest way home 631 00:32:18,069 --> 00:32:20,672 is to find the killer and collect the fee from Bragan. 632 00:32:20,672 --> 00:32:23,708 The investigation is in captain colvin's thumbs. 633 00:32:23,708 --> 00:32:25,443 (kelefy) I had hoped, mr. Wolfe, 634 00:32:25,877 --> 00:32:28,479 to thank you for the meal under happier circumstances. 635 00:32:28,479 --> 00:32:31,516 Yes, well, to be chosen as an instrument of hospitality 636 00:32:31,950 --> 00:32:34,986 on behalf of my country is a great honor. 637 00:32:34,986 --> 00:32:38,456 I regret the calamity that spoiled it. 638 00:32:40,191 --> 00:32:41,926 I thought it might amuse you to know 639 00:32:41,926 --> 00:32:45,396 how i came to make the request. 640 00:32:45,396 --> 00:32:48,866 Who knows in advance what will kill him. 641 00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:52,337 His insatiable curiosity. 642 00:32:52,337 --> 00:32:55,807 We are, as you have guessed, still curious about you. 643 00:32:55,807 --> 00:32:57,542 Merely curious? 644 00:32:59,711 --> 00:33:01,879 Why did you not cook the fish my husband caught? 645 00:33:01,879 --> 00:33:04,048 Caprice, i am a confirmed ecceric. 646 00:33:04,482 --> 00:33:07,518 Still, even a caprice must spring from something. 647 00:33:07,518 --> 00:33:10,989 No, no, no, a whim, a freakish dart of the mind. 648 00:33:10,989 --> 00:33:12,290 I see. 649 00:33:12,290 --> 00:33:14,459 I apologize for my persistence 650 00:33:14,459 --> 00:33:16,627 but in any cause celebre 651 00:33:16,627 --> 00:33:19,664 unexplained facts give rise to wild rumors. 652 00:33:19,664 --> 00:33:22,176 While the fact that you did not cook my fish 653 00:33:22,700 --> 00:33:24,435 can't possibly be connected to the murder, 654 00:33:24,435 --> 00:33:27,905 the gossips will do their best to invent one. 655 00:33:28,339 --> 00:33:30,942 You see my dilemma? I do. 656 00:33:30,942 --> 00:33:34,412 What will be thought, what will not be thought. 657 00:33:34,412 --> 00:33:38,750 Well, what if i to say that it amused me 658 00:33:38,750 --> 00:33:43,955 to twist the tales of highly placed persons 659 00:33:43,955 --> 00:33:48,292 and that it provided me with a touch of mockery 660 00:33:48,292 --> 00:33:51,763 not to cook your fish, how would that be? 661 00:33:51,763 --> 00:33:53,498 (chuckling) 662 00:33:53,931 --> 00:33:56,100 Excellent, you will say that? 663 00:33:56,100 --> 00:33:58,269 Yes, i see no objection to it. 664 00:33:58,269 --> 00:34:00,872 Again, my thanks. 665 00:34:00,872 --> 00:34:02,607 At the present, however, 666 00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:07,378 some unforeseen contingency might provide one. 667 00:34:07,378 --> 00:34:10,415 Provide what, an objection? 668 00:34:10,415 --> 00:34:11,716 Yes, perhaps. 669 00:34:12,150 --> 00:34:13,451 I would like to oblige you, 670 00:34:13,451 --> 00:34:15,620 but i cannot make it a commitment. 671 00:34:15,620 --> 00:34:18,222 I would not ask it of you. 672 00:34:20,825 --> 00:34:22,126 My gratitude. 673 00:34:22,126 --> 00:34:23,428 Yes, yes. 674 00:34:23,428 --> 00:34:25,163 I hope that you will permit me 675 00:34:25,536 --> 00:34:29,067 to proffer a token of my gratitude. 676 00:34:29,500 --> 00:34:32,537 Adria, querida, 677 00:34:32,970 --> 00:34:35,139 i think it would be fitting 678 00:34:35,139 --> 00:34:36,874 for you to present this to mr. Wolfe as a token, 679 00:34:36,874 --> 00:34:40,778 a symbol of our appreciation. 680 00:34:51,189 --> 00:34:55,960 I do beg you to accept this as a symbol of our gratitude. 681 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:58,129 Oh, this is most unnecessary. 682 00:34:58,129 --> 00:35:03,334 If it were necessary, it would not be so great a pleasure. 683 00:35:03,334 --> 00:35:04,635 Come, my dear. 684 00:35:11,142 --> 00:35:13,311 You wear it monday to fridays, i wear it weekends. 685 00:35:13,744 --> 00:35:15,480 Well, i'm no art expert. 686 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:17,648 Could be that the brown speck 687 00:35:17,648 --> 00:35:19,383 and the crack at the bottom makes it more valuable 688 00:35:19,817 --> 00:35:21,119 but i'd give it back. 689 00:35:21,119 --> 00:35:22,854 (Archie) I stared at him. 690 00:35:22,854 --> 00:35:25,890 He did this only when his brain was going full tilt 691 00:35:25,890 --> 00:35:28,926 with all the wheels whirling and all the wires singing. 692 00:35:28,926 --> 00:35:31,095 I must make a call. 693 00:35:31,095 --> 00:35:33,698 A phone call, where's the phone? 694 00:35:35,433 --> 00:35:36,300 ? A phone call, where's the phone? Parker 695 00:35:36,734 --> 00:35:38,903 yes, who's this? 696 00:35:38,903 --> 00:35:40,204 Ah, mr. Wolfe. 697 00:35:40,204 --> 00:35:43,241 Yes, i need some information from you. 698 00:35:43,241 --> 00:35:47,145 Mais il faut parler seulement francais... oui. 699 00:35:50,615 --> 00:35:51,916 Does that help you at all? 700 00:35:51,916 --> 00:35:53,651 Merci beaucoup. 701 00:35:55,386 --> 00:35:57,555 District attorney jessel, he'd like to speak with you. 702 00:35:57,555 --> 00:35:59,290 Yes, yes, first things first. 703 00:35:59,724 --> 00:36:02,326 Mr. Jessel, if i am to disclose the identity 704 00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:04,061 of the murderer of mr. Leeson, 705 00:36:04,061 --> 00:36:07,098 i should like to have it done in the presence of everyone. 706 00:36:07,098 --> 00:36:09,700 I wish you to gather them all in the great room. 707 00:36:09,700 --> 00:36:11,869 But before i disclose the murderer, 708 00:36:11,869 --> 00:36:15,773 i wish to speak to the secretary of state. 709 00:36:16,207 --> 00:36:17,508 Of new york? 710 00:36:17,508 --> 00:36:19,677 Of the united states of america, you mid-level moron. 711 00:36:19,677 --> 00:36:20,978 I see, well... 712 00:36:20,978 --> 00:36:23,147 i have a "must" too, mr. Wolfe. 713 00:36:23,147 --> 00:36:24,015 Yes? 714 00:36:24,015 --> 00:36:25,750 You must tell me what you're going to say! 715 00:36:25,750 --> 00:36:27,051 Impossible, i have a score to settle. 716 00:36:27,051 --> 00:36:29,220 And you might interfere with my payment. 717 00:36:29,220 --> 00:36:31,822 The murderer has foolishly offended 718 00:36:31,822 --> 00:36:33,558 my self-esteem... you, go! 719 00:36:33,558 --> 00:36:34,425 I'm not gonna... 720 00:36:34,859 --> 00:36:35,726 jasper... 721 00:36:35,726 --> 00:36:37,028 nate. 722 00:36:37,461 --> 00:36:38,763 Make the call. 723 00:36:38,763 --> 00:36:40,064 Mr. Wolfe. 724 00:36:40,064 --> 00:36:43,968 This man is either drunk, drugged or insane! 725 00:36:43,968 --> 00:36:45,703 (papps) Let him talk. 726 00:36:48,739 --> 00:36:50,474 When i arrived here, i was informed 727 00:36:50,908 --> 00:36:52,210 that all of you had gone fishing the day before. 728 00:36:52,643 --> 00:36:56,547 And so, all had caught a considerable number of fish. 729 00:36:56,547 --> 00:36:59,150 All of you, except the ambassador. 730 00:36:59,150 --> 00:37:00,451 That is correct. 731 00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:04,789 My luck was very bad but, as you know, today, 732 00:37:04,789 --> 00:37:06,524 my luck was good. 733 00:37:06,524 --> 00:37:09,560 Do you know, sir, why i did not cook your fish? 734 00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:12,163 Caprice... as you have told me, 735 00:37:12,163 --> 00:37:13,898 you have a very peculiar sense of humor. 736 00:37:14,332 --> 00:37:15,633 It was at your suggestion 737 00:37:15,633 --> 00:37:18,236 that i concocted that bogus explanation. 738 00:37:20,404 --> 00:37:22,573 Ahh... one of yours, mr. Bragan? 739 00:37:23,007 --> 00:37:23,874 (Bragan) Yes, my... 740 00:37:24,308 --> 00:37:27,345 i did not serve them, sir, because the fish were not fresh. 741 00:37:27,345 --> 00:37:28,646 Not fresh? 742 00:37:28,646 --> 00:37:30,381 You caught them yesterday, tied them together 743 00:37:30,381 --> 00:37:32,116 and left them somewhere in the creek. 744 00:37:32,116 --> 00:37:35,152 Then you came in, pretending to have caught nothing. 745 00:37:36,887 --> 00:37:39,056 Why would i do such a thing? 746 00:37:39,056 --> 00:37:40,791 To establish an alibi, sir. 747 00:37:41,225 --> 00:37:42,526 You brought those fish in this morning 748 00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,129 pretending that you had spent hours catching them 749 00:37:45,129 --> 00:37:47,298 when in fact, you were killing Leeson. 750 00:37:47,298 --> 00:37:49,033 (gasps) 751 00:37:49,033 --> 00:37:50,334 (gasps) 752 00:37:50,334 --> 00:37:53,804 (kelefy) Mr. Wolfe, why would i want to kill my own best friend? 753 00:37:53,804 --> 00:37:56,407 I could not surmise that, sir. 754 00:37:56,407 --> 00:38:00,311 But then, you came to my room to find out if i suspected you. 755 00:38:00,311 --> 00:38:02,046 When i tacitly admitted i did, 756 00:38:02,046 --> 00:38:04,215 you made the mistake of offering me a bribe. 757 00:38:04,215 --> 00:38:06,817 An emerald... this emerald. 758 00:38:06,817 --> 00:38:08,986 See, this, mr. Jessel? 759 00:38:08,986 --> 00:38:12,023 This, mr. Jessel, was the wound to my self-esteem. 760 00:38:12,456 --> 00:38:14,191 A gift from an admirer. 761 00:38:14,625 --> 00:38:17,228 It was a bribe, to silence me. 762 00:38:17,228 --> 00:38:18,963 Had it measured up to my conceits, 763 00:38:18,963 --> 00:38:21,132 had it been the kohinoor diamond, 764 00:38:21,504 --> 00:38:24,168 or even the zabara diamond, 765 00:38:24,168 --> 00:38:26,771 it might have served its purpose, who can say? 766 00:38:26,771 --> 00:38:30,241 But it is merely a large emerald with a noticeable flaw. 767 00:38:31,542 --> 00:38:33,277 This is quite fantastic. 768 00:38:33,277 --> 00:38:35,012 But then, sir, you insisted 769 00:38:35,012 --> 00:38:37,615 that your wife hand me the emerald. 770 00:38:37,615 --> 00:38:39,784 I believe your words were, "i think, my dear, 771 00:38:40,217 --> 00:38:44,121 it would be fitting for you to present it to mr. Wolfe." 772 00:38:44,121 --> 00:38:46,724 Why that choice of words, sir, why was it fitting? 773 00:38:46,724 --> 00:38:48,459 Diplomatic speech is flowery. 774 00:38:48,459 --> 00:38:50,628 But rarely without purpose. 775 00:38:50,628 --> 00:38:52,363 It forced me to consider her. 776 00:38:52,363 --> 00:38:55,399 Did your wife drive you to murder? 777 00:38:55,399 --> 00:38:57,568 Since i have been here, 778 00:38:57,568 --> 00:39:00,171 she has exercised her not-very-subtle charms 779 00:39:00,604 --> 00:39:02,773 on every male guest in this house. 780 00:39:02,773 --> 00:39:06,243 Of all of them, only mr. Leeson refused her. 781 00:39:06,677 --> 00:39:09,280 Did mr. Leeson have an affair with your wife 782 00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,015 when he served in your country? 783 00:39:11,015 --> 00:39:12,750 Oh, don't be absurd! 784 00:39:12,750 --> 00:39:14,051 Preposterous! 785 00:39:14,051 --> 00:39:15,786 David Leeson, he was just a boy scout. 786 00:39:15,786 --> 00:39:17,521 Sir, answer me. 787 00:39:21,859 --> 00:39:23,160 Sir, answer me! 788 00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:29,233 Yes, it was all her fault. 789 00:39:29,233 --> 00:39:34,004 You had an affair with my husband in your own house! 790 00:39:34,004 --> 00:39:35,306 You had your claws... 791 00:39:35,306 --> 00:39:37,908 (Archie) Take it easy, girls. 792 00:39:37,908 --> 00:39:39,643 (speaking foreign language) 793 00:39:39,643 --> 00:39:41,812 You had your claws in him so deep, 794 00:39:42,246 --> 00:39:43,981 i got him called back home. 795 00:39:48,319 --> 00:39:50,488 You went after him again, 796 00:39:50,488 --> 00:39:53,958 as soon as you saw him, didn't you? 797 00:39:53,958 --> 00:39:56,127 But he wouldn't have any of it. 798 00:39:56,127 --> 00:39:59,163 So you told your husband everything, didn't you? 799 00:39:59,163 --> 00:40:00,464 In one of your famous little fits. 800 00:40:00,464 --> 00:40:01,766 You had him kill David! 801 00:40:02,199 --> 00:40:03,501 Madam! 802 00:40:03,934 --> 00:40:06,103 Why in god's name did you not say this before? 803 00:40:06,103 --> 00:40:08,706 Because i didn't want anyone in washington 804 00:40:08,706 --> 00:40:10,875 to know what a fool David had been. 805 00:40:10,875 --> 00:40:14,345 Besides, what difference does it make now? 806 00:40:14,779 --> 00:40:16,947 I mean... the law cannot touch them. 807 00:40:17,381 --> 00:40:19,984 Why not? He's a killer. 808 00:40:19,984 --> 00:40:22,153 There's one advantage to being in the woods, mr. Wolfe. 809 00:40:22,153 --> 00:40:24,755 We can at least book him, hold him until... 810 00:40:24,755 --> 00:40:26,490 hold your tongue, mr. Colvin. 811 00:40:26,490 --> 00:40:28,225 Not another word. 812 00:40:28,225 --> 00:40:31,262 The kelefys are immune to prosecution, but we are not. 813 00:40:31,262 --> 00:40:33,864 Now, i asked my lawyer to read me a statute 814 00:40:33,864 --> 00:40:35,599 on diplomatic im. 815 00:40:36,033 --> 00:40:38,636 Archie, if you will, read the last paragraph. 816 00:40:38,636 --> 00:40:40,371 (Archie) Sure, yes. 817 00:40:40,371 --> 00:40:42,973 Ahem, "anyone who obtains a writ of process 818 00:40:43,407 --> 00:40:44,708 "in violation of this statute 819 00:40:44,708 --> 00:40:46,877 "and every other officer concerned 820 00:40:46,877 --> 00:40:48,179 "in executing a writ or process 821 00:40:48,179 --> 00:40:51,215 "shall be deemed a violator of the law of nations 822 00:40:51,215 --> 00:40:52,950 "a disturber of the public repose 823 00:40:52,950 --> 00:40:55,986 and shall be imprisoned for not more than three years." 824 00:40:55,986 --> 00:40:57,288 (Wolfe) Yes, which is why i insisted 825 00:40:57,721 --> 00:40:59,890 on speaking directly to the secretary of state. 826 00:40:59,890 --> 00:41:01,192 He confirmed it. 827 00:41:01,625 --> 00:41:03,794 I do not wish to spend three years in prison 828 00:41:04,228 --> 00:41:05,963 for exposing a murderer. 829 00:41:07,698 --> 00:41:09,433 Congratulations, mr. Wolfe. 830 00:41:09,433 --> 00:41:11,168 My dear, come. 831 00:41:11,168 --> 00:41:12,903 (kelefy) Spiros... 832 00:41:12,903 --> 00:41:14,638 spiros. 833 00:41:21,145 --> 00:41:23,747 Mr. Kelefy... a personal point. 834 00:41:23,747 --> 00:41:26,350 Was it a also a stab at my self-esteem 835 00:41:26,350 --> 00:41:28,519 that you arranged for me to be here 836 00:41:28,519 --> 00:41:31,121 for the added fillip of gullg me? 837 00:41:31,121 --> 00:41:32,857 No, mr. Wolfe. 838 00:41:32,857 --> 00:41:35,459 When i expressed my desire, i had not yet contemplated 839 00:41:35,459 --> 00:41:39,363 actions that might arouse your prol interests. 840 00:41:39,363 --> 00:41:42,833 Once i had, i thought it would be prudent 841 00:41:42,833 --> 00:41:45,436 not to retract the invitation. 842 00:41:45,870 --> 00:41:48,038 Thank you for lunch. 843 00:41:57,581 --> 00:42:00,184 Nice picture of kelefy, not many details 844 00:42:00,618 --> 00:42:02,786 hot him nice picture of kelefy, coming home from the airport. S 845 00:42:02,786 --> 00:42:04,955 it doesn't say whether it was for the murder 846 00:42:04,955 --> 00:42:07,558 or ruining the oil negotiations. 847 00:42:07,558 --> 00:42:09,293 I doubt if he cared much. 848 00:42:09,293 --> 00:42:11,462 Thank you, Fritz. 849 00:42:12,763 --> 00:42:16,667 "Death is nothing to us. 850 00:42:16,667 --> 00:42:19,703 "That which is dissolved into its elements, 851 00:42:19,703 --> 00:42:22,306 experiences no sensations..." 852 00:42:22,306 --> 00:42:24,041 you're using those eggs? 853 00:42:24,041 --> 00:42:27,511 These eggs were laid fresh this morning. 854 00:42:27,945 --> 00:42:30,548 "And that which has no sensation, 855 00:42:30,548 --> 00:42:32,716 is nothing to us." 856 00:42:32,716 --> 00:42:34,018 So you agree with me? 857 00:42:34,451 --> 00:42:35,319 I shall never forgive him. 858 00:42:35,753 --> 00:42:36,620 For what? 859 00:42:37,054 --> 00:42:38,789 I am fond of trout, and i shall never 860 00:42:39,223 --> 00:42:42,693 be able to savor it in just the same way again. 861 00:42:42,693 --> 00:42:43,994 You'll get over it. 862 00:42:43,994 --> 00:42:45,296 Where are you going? 863 00:42:45,296 --> 00:42:46,597 Me? 864 00:42:46,597 --> 00:42:48,332 Ahem, i'm going to central park zoo... yeah. 865 00:42:48,766 --> 00:42:50,067 I'm taking the widow Leeson. 866 00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:52,236 Showing her the penguins, make her smile. 867 00:42:52,670 --> 00:42:55,706 Yes, it's my mission in life to make her smile. 868 00:42:56,140 --> 00:42:57,441 I need you here. 869 00:42:57,441 --> 00:43:00,477 Oh, i'm sorry, my uh, my country calls... duty. 870 00:43:00,477 --> 00:43:02,212 The orchid list just arrived, i need you. 871 00:43:02,212 --> 00:43:04,381 Oh, well, i wouldn't want to miss that. 872 00:43:04,381 --> 00:43:06,116 When i get back. 873 00:43:06,550 --> 00:43:07,851 (phone ringing) 874 00:43:07,851 --> 00:43:09,153 Oh. 875 00:43:13,924 --> 00:43:17,394 Nero Wolfe's office. Archie good... 876 00:43:17,394 --> 00:43:21,298 uh... yes, sir. 877 00:43:21,298 --> 00:43:25,202 Ye... ye... i'll ask him, sir. 878 00:43:25,202 --> 00:43:26,503 Who is it? 879 00:43:26,937 --> 00:43:28,672 It's the president. 880 00:43:28,672 --> 00:43:30,407 What? 881 00:43:30,407 --> 00:43:31,709 Of the united states. 882 00:43:31,709 --> 00:43:33,877 And he heard about your gourmet trout, 883 00:43:33,877 --> 00:43:36,046 he wants to invite you to camp David for the weekend. 884 00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:38,215 Hold on, sir. 885 00:43:41,685 --> 00:43:42,987 Yes, sir... 886 00:43:42,987 --> 00:43:46,848 no, i am not interested in a subscription 887 00:43:48,626 --> 00:43:51,662 Archie, come back here! 888 00:43:52,096 --> 00:43:53,397 Archie! 889 00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:59,470 Captioning made possible by a&e television networks 890 00:44:00,305 --> 00:44:06,617 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from OpenSubtitles.org 891 00:44:06,667 --> 00:44:11,217 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 65577

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