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1
00:00:11,500 --> 00:00:13,669
( mooing )
2
00:00:13,669 --> 00:00:15,404
( nervous chatter )
3
00:00:16,272 --> 00:00:17,573
( mooing )
4
00:00:20,610 --> 00:00:21,911
DON'T WORRY, EVERYONE.
5
00:00:21,911 --> 00:00:24,947
I'LL SHOOT 'ER DOWN
WITH MY ASSAULT RIFLE.
6
00:00:27,116 --> 00:00:28,851
MOVE OVER !
7
00:00:28,851 --> 00:00:29,719
I'LL HANDLE THIS.
8
00:00:30,152 --> 00:00:33,189
DANG, I REALLY WANTED
TO SHOOT SOMETHIN'.
9
00:00:33,189 --> 00:00:34,924
( grunting )
10
00:00:40,129 --> 00:00:41,430
LOOK OUT !
11
00:00:41,430 --> 00:00:43,599
COW IN DANGER.
12
00:00:53,576 --> 00:00:54,877
HUH ?
13
00:00:54,877 --> 00:00:57,480
YOU'RE NOT
A REAL COW.
14
00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:58,347
( beeping )
15
00:00:58,347 --> 00:01:00,082
"SURPRISE STRIPPERELLA.
16
00:01:00,082 --> 00:01:02,685
"YOU'RE DEAD" ?
17
00:01:02,685 --> 00:01:05,288
( beeping )
18
00:01:11,794 --> 00:01:14,830
STUNTMAN SUPPLIES,
CRASHPADS.
19
00:01:16,999 --> 00:01:18,734
STUNTMANSUPPLIES ?
20
00:01:18,734 --> 00:01:22,204
SHOULDN'T IT BE
"STUNTPERSON" SUPPLIES ?
21
00:01:26,108 --> 00:01:28,711
( mooing )
22
00:01:49,098 --> 00:01:52,134
♪ Stripperella ♪
23
00:01:53,436 --> 00:01:56,472
♪ Stripperella ♪♪
24
00:02:11,654 --> 00:02:12,955
I HAD THE WORST NIGHTMARE.
25
00:02:12,955 --> 00:02:15,124
I WAS GIVING A SPEECH
IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE
26
00:02:15,124 --> 00:02:17,727
AND THEN I REALIZED
I WAS IN MY UNDIES !
27
00:02:17,727 --> 00:02:19,895
IT WAS SO EMBARRASSING !
28
00:02:19,895 --> 00:02:21,197
HEY, EROTICA I--
29
00:02:21,630 --> 00:02:23,366
( gasps )
30
00:02:23,366 --> 00:02:24,667
UGH !
31
00:02:24,667 --> 00:02:26,402
OH, KEVIN,
I'M SO SORRY.
32
00:02:26,402 --> 00:02:27,703
I'M JUST REAL JUMPY.
33
00:02:28,137 --> 00:02:30,306
SOMEONE KEEPS TRYING TO KILL ME
AND IT'S MAKING ME ON EDGE.
34
00:02:30,306 --> 00:02:31,607
SOMEONE'S TRYING
TO KILL YOU ?
35
00:02:32,041 --> 00:02:32,908
NO-- NOT ME.
36
00:02:32,908 --> 00:02:35,077
SOMEONE'S TRYING TO
KILL... SOMEONE ELSE
37
00:02:35,077 --> 00:02:37,680
AND IT'S JUST REALLY
STRESSING ME OUT.
38
00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:39,415
HEY, EROTICA,
YOU GOT A SECOND ?
39
00:02:39,415 --> 00:02:40,716
SURE.
40
00:02:40,716 --> 00:02:44,186
A SECOND... A MINUTE..
A LIFETIME...
41
00:02:44,620 --> 00:02:46,789
NOW, WHY DIDN'T
SHE KICK HIS PRIVATES ?
42
00:02:47,223 --> 00:02:48,958
UM, I WAS WONDERING,
43
00:02:48,958 --> 00:02:51,560
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT
DATING SOMEONE YOU WORK WITH ?
44
00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:53,295
UM, I DON'T HAVE
A PROBLEM WITH THAT.
45
00:02:53,729 --> 00:02:55,898
YOU DON'T THINK
IT'S INAPPROPRIATE,
46
00:02:56,332 --> 00:02:57,633
THAT IT COULD
GET COMPLICATED ?
47
00:02:57,633 --> 00:03:01,103
NO, IF TWO PEOPLE WANT TO
BE TOGETHER THEY SHOULD--
48
00:03:01,103 --> 00:03:01,971
GUN !
49
00:03:01,971 --> 00:03:03,272
HI-YAH !
50
00:03:03,272 --> 00:03:05,441
EROTICA,
WHAT IS WITH YOU ?!
51
00:03:05,875 --> 00:03:08,043
THAT'S ONE OF THEM NEW
NOVELTY CELL PHONES
52
00:03:08,043 --> 00:03:10,212
IT JUST
LOOKS LIKE A GUN !
53
00:03:10,212 --> 00:03:12,815
SEE ?
54
00:03:12,815 --> 00:03:14,550
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO ME.
55
00:03:14,550 --> 00:03:16,719
I JUST KEEP OVERREACTING
TO EVERYTHING--
56
00:03:17,153 --> 00:03:17,586
BOMB !
57
00:03:17,586 --> 00:03:20,189
EVERYBODY DOWN !
58
00:03:20,189 --> 00:03:21,490
HUH ?
59
00:03:21,490 --> 00:03:23,225
WHAT DID YOU
DO THAT FOR ?
60
00:03:23,225 --> 00:03:25,828
THAT WAS A CAKE FOR
MY DAD'S RETIREMENT !
61
00:03:26,262 --> 00:03:27,129
I'M SO SORRY--
62
00:03:27,563 --> 00:03:28,864
WELL, YOU SHOULD
BE SORRY !
63
00:03:28,864 --> 00:03:29,732
MY MOTHER
BAKED THAT CAKE
64
00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:32,768
RIGHT BEFORE
SHE PASSED AWAY !
65
00:03:34,937 --> 00:03:35,805
SO, WHERE WERE WE ?
66
00:03:36,238 --> 00:03:38,407
UM, MAYBE NOW'S
NOT A GOOD TIME.
67
00:03:38,407 --> 00:03:40,142
I SHOULD GET BACK
TO THE TUNES.
68
00:03:40,576 --> 00:03:42,311
I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.
69
00:03:42,311 --> 00:03:43,612
OKAY.
70
00:03:43,612 --> 00:03:44,914
BUT IF IT MEANS ANYTHING,
71
00:03:45,347 --> 00:03:49,251
I DEFINITELY THINK TWO PEOPLE
THAT WORK TOGETHER CAN DATE.
72
00:03:49,251 --> 00:03:49,685
UH, EROTICA,
MAYBE--
73
00:03:50,119 --> 00:03:52,288
UHH !
74
00:03:52,288 --> 00:03:53,589
AHH !
75
00:03:57,927 --> 00:04:00,095
THE PRESSURE OF LIVING THIS
DOUBLE LIFE IS GETTING TO ME.
76
00:04:00,095 --> 00:04:01,397
I FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR
THE ENTIRE WORLD
77
00:04:01,831 --> 00:04:02,698
AND THERE'S
A GUY AT WORK I LIKE
78
00:04:03,132 --> 00:04:04,433
AND IT'S IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME
TO GET CLOSE TO ANYBODY
79
00:04:04,433 --> 00:04:06,602
BECAUSE I ALWAYS HAVE TO
LIE ABOUT WHO I REALLY AM.
80
00:04:06,602 --> 00:04:07,903
I'M NOT A GOOD LIAR.
81
00:04:07,903 --> 00:04:09,205
THERE ARE
ANTS IN MY KITCHEN,
82
00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:11,373
MY TOILET'S MAKING
A FUNNY NOISE,
83
00:04:11,373 --> 00:04:15,277
AND ON TOP OF ALL THAT...
SOMEONE'S TRYING TO KILL ME.
84
00:04:15,277 --> 00:04:17,012
YOU'RE HOLDING BACK.
85
00:04:17,012 --> 00:04:18,747
IT'S JUST HARD
TO GET CLOSE TO SOMEONE.
86
00:04:18,747 --> 00:04:20,483
I WANT TO FALL IN LOVE
BUT I FEEL SO GUARDED
87
00:04:20,483 --> 00:04:22,651
BECAUSE OF MY SECRET LIFE.
88
00:04:22,651 --> 00:04:26,555
STRIPPERELLA, I WANT YOU
TO SQUEEZE MY BALLS.
89
00:04:26,555 --> 00:04:28,290
EXCUSE ME ?
90
00:04:28,290 --> 00:04:30,893
MY STRESS BALLS.
91
00:04:30,893 --> 00:04:32,194
I'M THINKING OF
MARKETING THEM,
92
00:04:32,194 --> 00:04:33,929
BUT I'M STILL
TESTING THEM OUT.
93
00:04:33,929 --> 00:04:36,966
HERE, YOU CAN HAVE
SOME OF MY "TESTIES".
94
00:04:38,267 --> 00:04:39,568
WHENEVER YOU'RE STRESSED,
95
00:04:39,568 --> 00:04:42,171
I WANT YOU TO CLOSE YOUR EYES
TAKE A DEEP BREATH,
96
00:04:42,171 --> 00:04:46,075
AND CHANNEL ALL OF YOUR
NEGATIVE ENERGY INTO MY BALLS.
97
00:04:46,509 --> 00:04:49,545
( panting & grunting )
98
00:05:08,631 --> 00:05:11,233
WOW, YOU KNOW,
I FEEL BETTER ALREADY.
99
00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:12,968
UH, YES...
100
00:05:12,968 --> 00:05:15,571
I'LL GET YOU SOME MORE.
101
00:05:15,571 --> 00:05:19,475
LET ME GRAB SOME MORE TESTIES
OUT OF MY BALL SACK.
102
00:05:19,909 --> 00:05:21,210
( splash )
103
00:05:21,210 --> 00:05:24,246
OH MY, LOOK AT THAT,
A NAKED LADY.
104
00:05:26,415 --> 00:05:28,150
I'M NOT SEEING IT.
105
00:05:28,150 --> 00:05:29,451
( phone ringing )
106
00:05:29,451 --> 00:05:31,186
EXCUSE ME, THAT'S MY
BIRTH CONTROL PILL PHONE.
107
00:05:31,620 --> 00:05:32,488
I GOTTA TAKE THIS.
108
00:05:32,922 --> 00:05:35,524
I MISSED IT ONCE
AND I GOT IN BIG TROUBLE.
109
00:05:35,524 --> 00:05:38,561
CHIEF STROGANOFF,
AGENT 69 HERE.
110
00:05:38,561 --> 00:05:40,296
( Stroganoff )
Stripperella, I need you
to meet me
111
00:05:40,296 --> 00:05:42,031
at the old corn field
right away,
112
00:05:42,031 --> 00:05:43,332
it's an emergency.
113
00:05:43,766 --> 00:05:45,067
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.
114
00:05:46,802 --> 00:05:48,971
( crows cawing )
115
00:06:02,851 --> 00:06:04,587
( phone ringing )
116
00:06:05,454 --> 00:06:06,322
CHIEF HERE.
117
00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:08,057
CHIEF,
I'M AT THE CORNFIELD.
118
00:06:08,057 --> 00:06:09,358
WHERE ARE YOU ?
119
00:06:09,358 --> 00:06:10,659
WHAT CORNFIELD ?
120
00:06:10,659 --> 00:06:11,961
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT ?
121
00:06:11,961 --> 00:06:13,696
YOU CALLED ME AND TOLD ME
TO MEET YOU HERE.
122
00:06:13,696 --> 00:06:15,431
NOPE, WASN'T ME.
123
00:06:15,431 --> 00:06:16,732
I'M GUESSING
SOMEONE HACKED INTO
124
00:06:16,732 --> 00:06:18,467
OUR SECRET ORGANIZATION'S
SYSTEM TO CALL YOU
125
00:06:18,901 --> 00:06:21,503
AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE IT
WAS COMING FROM MY NUMBER.
126
00:06:21,503 --> 00:06:22,805
then they probably
used a computer
127
00:06:23,238 --> 00:06:25,841
to match my voice print and
fool you into going down there.
128
00:06:25,841 --> 00:06:28,444
IT'S PROBABLY THE PERSON
WHO'S BEEN TRYING TO KILL YOU.
129
00:06:28,444 --> 00:06:30,179
Well, I gotta run.
130
00:06:30,179 --> 00:06:32,348
TIME FOR MY
BOTOX INJECTIONS.
131
00:06:50,566 --> 00:06:54,036
INVISIBLE BULLETPROOF UMBRELLA,
DON'T FAIL ME NOW !
132
00:07:00,542 --> 00:07:02,711
DAMN INVISIBLE
BULLETPROOF UMBRELLA.
133
00:07:02,711 --> 00:07:05,314
I'LL KILL YOU YET !
134
00:07:07,916 --> 00:07:09,218
"I'M GONNA KILL YOU,
STRIPPERELLA.
135
00:07:09,652 --> 00:07:12,688
"YOU REALLY
GOT LUCKY THIS TIME,
136
00:07:12,688 --> 00:07:13,989
"BUT YOU CAN'T ESCAPE FOREVER.
137
00:07:13,989 --> 00:07:16,592
"SERIOUSLY,
YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED.
138
00:07:16,592 --> 00:07:19,628
"I WON'T STOP UNTIL
YOU'RE DEED...
139
00:07:19,628 --> 00:07:22,665
OOPS, THAT WAS
SUPPOSED TO SAY 'DEAD'."
140
00:07:22,665 --> 00:07:24,400
( gasps )
141
00:07:31,806 --> 00:07:33,108
GENTLEMEN, PUT YOUR
HANDS TOGETHER
142
00:07:33,108 --> 00:07:35,710
FOR THE ENCHANTING,
EXHILARATING, EXQUISITE,
143
00:07:35,710 --> 00:07:39,181
EROTICA !
144
00:07:40,916 --> 00:07:42,217
( wolf whistles )
145
00:07:47,856 --> 00:07:49,157
( glass shattering )
146
00:07:49,157 --> 00:07:50,458
AHH !
147
00:07:52,627 --> 00:07:54,362
HUH ?
148
00:07:56,531 --> 00:07:57,832
UH...
149
00:07:57,832 --> 00:08:02,170
LET'S HAVE ANOTHER ROUND
OF APPLAUSE FOR EROTICA !
150
00:08:02,170 --> 00:08:03,905
NOW, GET READY FOR GISELLE
151
00:08:03,905 --> 00:08:07,375
AND HER SPICY TRIBUTE
TO ICE HOCKEY.
152
00:08:07,375 --> 00:08:10,845
OOH,
I'VE GOT A ZAMBONI...
153
00:08:16,918 --> 00:08:18,220
THANKS FOR
COVERING FOR ME.
154
00:08:18,220 --> 00:08:19,955
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S
GOTTEN INTO ME LATELY.
155
00:08:19,955 --> 00:08:21,256
OH, NO PROBLEM.
156
00:08:21,256 --> 00:08:22,991
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN THINKING
ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE SAYING
157
00:08:22,991 --> 00:08:24,292
ABOUT TWO PEOPLE
AT WORK DATING...
158
00:08:24,726 --> 00:08:25,594
REALLY ?
159
00:08:25,594 --> 00:08:27,762
HEY, YOU KNOW THERE'S AN
OLD HORROR MOVIE FESTIVAL
160
00:08:27,762 --> 00:08:29,064
THIS WEEKEND,
DOWNTOWN.
161
00:08:29,497 --> 00:08:30,799
I LOVE HORROR MOVIES.
162
00:08:31,233 --> 00:08:32,968
OH, AWESOME, I LOVE
HORROR MOVIES TOO.
163
00:08:32,968 --> 00:08:35,136
WOW, WE HAVE
SO MUCH IN--
164
00:08:35,136 --> 00:08:36,871
( beeping & vibrating )
165
00:08:36,871 --> 00:08:38,607
OOH...
I GOTTA GO.
166
00:08:38,607 --> 00:08:39,908
AAAGH !
167
00:08:39,908 --> 00:08:42,077
DON'T HURT ME,
DON'T HURT ME !
168
00:08:43,378 --> 00:08:45,113
WHEW-- AAH !
169
00:08:47,282 --> 00:08:49,884
OOPSIE...
170
00:08:50,752 --> 00:08:52,487
CHIEF STROGANOFF, AGENT 69
REPORTING FOR DUTY.
171
00:08:52,487 --> 00:08:53,355
( chainsaw buzzing )
172
00:08:53,355 --> 00:08:54,656
WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?!
173
00:08:54,656 --> 00:08:55,957
I'M PERFORMING A BRIS.
174
00:08:55,957 --> 00:08:57,259
WAIT !
175
00:08:57,259 --> 00:08:58,994
YOU CAN'T PERFORM
A CIRCUMCISION
WITH A CHAINSAW !
176
00:08:58,994 --> 00:09:00,295
RIGHT !
177
00:09:00,295 --> 00:09:02,464
THANK GOD
I'M NOT RELIGIOUS.
178
00:09:02,464 --> 00:09:05,500
SORRY, WIENSTEINS,
MAZELTOV.
179
00:09:08,103 --> 00:09:09,838
SO, WHY'D YOU
CALL ME DOWN HERE ?
180
00:09:10,272 --> 00:09:12,440
WE KNOW WHO'S
TRYING TO KILL YOU.
181
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:13,308
WHO ?
182
00:09:13,742 --> 00:09:15,477
SPECIAL AGENT 14
WILL FILL YOU IN.
183
00:09:15,477 --> 00:09:18,079
SEND IN SPECIAL AGENT 14.
184
00:09:20,248 --> 00:09:22,417
CHIEF...
STRIPPERELLA.
185
00:09:22,851 --> 00:09:28,490
I WAS ABLE TO DO A HANDWRITING
ANALYSIS ON THE SKYWRITING.
186
00:09:31,092 --> 00:09:32,827
WOULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN EASIER
TO DO A HAND-WRITING ANALYSIS
187
00:09:32,827 --> 00:09:34,996
FROM ONE OF THOSE
HAND-WRITTEN DEATH THREATS ?
188
00:09:34,996 --> 00:09:37,165
YES, BUT THIS
WAS FUNNIER.
189
00:09:37,599 --> 00:09:41,069
ANYHOW, I FOUND THAT THE
SKYWRITING IS A DIRECT MATCH
190
00:09:41,503 --> 00:09:43,672
WITH THE
SIGNATURE OF...
191
00:09:43,672 --> 00:09:45,407
QUEEN CLITORIS.
192
00:09:45,407 --> 00:09:48,877
NOTICE THE FANCY
LOOPS ON THE "E"s.
193
00:09:49,311 --> 00:09:50,612
QUEEN CLITORIS ?!
194
00:09:50,612 --> 00:09:52,781
THAT WAS CLITORIS
UNDER THAT HOOD ?
195
00:09:52,781 --> 00:09:54,082
SHE MUST STILL BE ANGRY
196
00:09:54,082 --> 00:09:55,817
BECAUSE I THWARTED HER PLANS
TO BLOW UP THE WORLD.
197
00:09:55,817 --> 00:09:57,552
YOU'VE OBVIOUSLY
STIMULATED CLITORIS
198
00:09:57,552 --> 00:09:59,721
AND GOT HER
ALL WORKED UP.
199
00:09:59,721 --> 00:10:01,456
I THINK YOU NEED TO
FINISH HER OFF.
200
00:10:01,456 --> 00:10:02,757
YOU'RE RIGHT, I CAN'T JUST
WAIT AROUND FOR HER
201
00:10:02,757 --> 00:10:04,926
TO TRY TO KILL ME... AGAIN.
202
00:10:04,926 --> 00:10:05,794
I'M GONNA
BRING HER TO ME.
203
00:10:06,227 --> 00:10:07,529
HOW ?
204
00:10:07,529 --> 00:10:10,565
I'M GONNA LURE HER WITH THE ONE
THING I KNOW SHE CAN'T RESIST.
205
00:10:10,565 --> 00:10:13,601
THE WORLD'S GREATEST
LATIN LOVER, ARMANDO.
206
00:10:14,035 --> 00:10:18,373
I THINK I KNOW SOMEONE ELSE
WHO CANNOT RESIST ARMANDO...
207
00:10:18,373 --> 00:10:20,542
STRIPPERELLA.
208
00:10:20,975 --> 00:10:22,711
WELL, I GUESS
HE'S KIND OF CUTE.
209
00:10:30,085 --> 00:10:32,687
OH, I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE--
OH, THANK YOU.
210
00:10:32,687 --> 00:10:35,290
AHHH...
211
00:10:35,290 --> 00:10:37,459
STRIPPERELLA ?
212
00:10:37,459 --> 00:10:39,194
ARMANDO,
I JUST HAD TO SEE YOU.
213
00:10:39,627 --> 00:10:41,796
YOU WANT ME TO SIGN
FOR YOU A COPY OF MY BOOK,
214
00:10:41,796 --> 00:10:44,833
"HOW TO BE MAKING THE LOVE,
ARMANDO TEACH YOU."
215
00:10:45,266 --> 00:10:47,435
NO, WELL, YES,
I WOULD LIKE THAT.
216
00:10:47,435 --> 00:10:48,737
BUT THAT'S NOW
WHY I'M HERE.
217
00:10:48,737 --> 00:10:50,038
I WAITED IN LINE
TWO AND A HALF HOURS
218
00:10:50,038 --> 00:10:52,640
TO TELL YOU THAT MY LIFE IS
IN DANGER AND I NEED YOUR HELP.
219
00:10:53,074 --> 00:10:54,809
THEN MY HELP YOU MUST HAVE.
220
00:10:54,809 --> 00:10:57,846
ARMANDO WILL RETURN TO SIGN YOUR
BOOKS AND YOUR BOOBIES LATER.
221
00:10:57,846 --> 00:10:59,581
BUT, FOR NOW,
ARMANDO MUST GO.
222
00:11:00,014 --> 00:11:03,051
FOR, I AM THE
WORLD'S GREATEST LOVER.
223
00:11:03,485 --> 00:11:06,521
THAT IS MY GIFT,
THAT IS MY CURSE.
224
00:11:06,521 --> 00:11:09,557
AWW...
AWW... AWW...
225
00:11:09,557 --> 00:11:11,292
LET'S GO.
OOH !
226
00:11:11,726 --> 00:11:12,160
LEONARD ?
227
00:11:12,594 --> 00:11:13,895
STRIPPERELLA ?
228
00:11:13,895 --> 00:11:15,196
HOW DID YOU
KNOW MY NAME ?
229
00:11:15,196 --> 00:11:19,100
OH, UH,
I HEARD HER SAY IT.
230
00:11:20,835 --> 00:11:22,137
WAIT A MINUTE...
231
00:11:22,137 --> 00:11:24,739
HOW DOESSHE
KNOW MY NAME ?
232
00:11:29,944 --> 00:11:31,679
( Stroganoff )
BASED ON OUR
PREVIOUS SURVEILLANCE
233
00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:32,981
OF QUEEN CLITORIS,
234
00:11:33,415 --> 00:11:35,583
WE KNOW THAT SHE FREQUENTS
ARMANDO'S WEBSITE.
235
00:11:35,583 --> 00:11:39,921
I AM PLACING A MESSAGE TO
QUEEN CLITORIS ON YOUR SITE,
236
00:11:39,921 --> 00:11:44,259
SAYING THAT YOU WANT TO MAKE
MAD PASSIONATE WHOOPIE TO HER.
237
00:11:44,259 --> 00:11:49,030
NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS
WAIT FOR HER TO RESPOND.
238
00:11:49,030 --> 00:11:51,633
ARMANDO, THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR HELPING US.
239
00:11:51,633 --> 00:11:53,802
IF ANYONE CAN HANDLE
CLITORIS, IT'S ME.
240
00:11:53,802 --> 00:11:55,970
HEY, MAYBE WHEN
I'M DONE HANDLING HER,
241
00:11:55,970 --> 00:11:59,007
I WILL HANDLE YOU,
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN...
242
00:11:59,007 --> 00:12:00,308
OOH...
243
00:12:00,308 --> 00:12:02,477
♪ STRIPPERELLA AND ARMANDO
SITTING IN A TREE ♪
244
00:12:02,911 --> 00:12:05,513
♪ K-I-S-S-I-N-G,
FIRST COMES--
245
00:12:05,513 --> 00:12:06,815
QUIT IT !
246
00:12:06,815 --> 00:12:09,417
K-I-S...
COOKING ?
247
00:12:09,417 --> 00:12:11,586
BINGO !
248
00:12:11,586 --> 00:12:13,755
CLITORIS HAS RESPONDED !
249
00:12:13,755 --> 00:12:16,791
SHE WANTS ARMANDO TO
MEET HER TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT
250
00:12:16,791 --> 00:12:19,394
AT A BAR CALLED
"THE WET SPOT."
251
00:12:19,828 --> 00:12:20,695
THE WET SPOT ?
252
00:12:20,695 --> 00:12:21,996
THE WET SPOT...
253
00:12:22,430 --> 00:12:23,731
IT'S A LITTLE
HOLE IN THE WALL,
254
00:12:23,731 --> 00:12:26,334
AT THE CORNER OF CANAL STREET
AND BUSH DRIVE,
255
00:12:26,334 --> 00:12:28,069
IT'S IN THE
MEAT PACKING DISTRICT.
256
00:12:28,069 --> 00:12:30,238
ARMANDO KNOWS
WHERE THE WET SPOT IS.
257
00:12:30,672 --> 00:12:32,841
I CAN SMELL CLITORIS
RIGHT ON OUR FINGERTIPS.
258
00:12:37,545 --> 00:12:39,280
ALL RIGHT, GENTLEMEN,
FEELING SICK ?
259
00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:42,316
( man )
TAKE TWO ASS-PIRIN AND
CALL HER IN THE MORNING.
260
00:12:42,316 --> 00:12:44,051
HERE'S CAT.
261
00:12:44,051 --> 00:12:46,654
( wolf whistle )
262
00:12:54,462 --> 00:12:56,197
( wolf whistle )
263
00:13:10,945 --> 00:13:12,680
( wolf whistle )
264
00:13:22,223 --> 00:13:24,392
( wolf whistle )
265
00:13:32,633 --> 00:13:34,802
( wolf whistle )
266
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:47,381
AND SO,
WHENEVER I'M STRESSED,
267
00:13:47,381 --> 00:13:49,550
I JUST SQUEEZE THESE BALLS
AND I FEEL BETTER.
268
00:13:49,550 --> 00:13:50,851
THESE TWO
ARE JUST TESTIES.
269
00:13:51,285 --> 00:13:52,587
I HAVE SO MANY
RESPONSES TO THAT
270
00:13:52,587 --> 00:13:54,322
I'M JUST NOT GONNA
SAY ANYTHING.
271
00:13:54,322 --> 00:13:55,623
WELL, EROTICA,
272
00:13:55,623 --> 00:13:57,792
I TOOK YOUR ADVICE ABOUT
ASKING SOMEONE OUT AT WORK.
273
00:13:57,792 --> 00:14:00,828
I ASKED PERSEPHONE TO GO WITH ME
TO THE HORROR FEST ON FRIDAY.
274
00:14:01,262 --> 00:14:02,129
OH...
275
00:14:02,563 --> 00:14:04,298
PERSEPHONE IS THE GIRL YOU
WERE TALKING ABOUT AT WORK.
276
00:14:04,298 --> 00:14:06,901
I KNEW THAT.
277
00:14:06,901 --> 00:14:08,202
SHE SAID NO.
278
00:14:08,636 --> 00:14:12,106
WOW, I DON'T THINK PERSEPHONE'S
EVER SAID NO TO A GUY.
279
00:14:12,106 --> 00:14:13,841
GET THIS, AFTER ALL THAT
280
00:14:13,841 --> 00:14:16,877
SHE SAID SHE DOESN'T BELIEVE
IN DATING PEOPLE AT WORK.
281
00:14:16,877 --> 00:14:17,745
THAT'S GREAT !
282
00:14:18,179 --> 00:14:19,480
IT IS ?
NO...
283
00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,649
I REALLY WANTED
TO GO TO THAT HORROR FEST.
284
00:14:21,649 --> 00:14:25,119
HEY, HEY YOU WANTED TO GO
TO THE HORROR FEST, TOO !
285
00:14:25,119 --> 00:14:26,420
I SURE DO !
286
00:14:26,420 --> 00:14:28,589
EROTICA, WHAT DO YOU SAY
THE TWO OF US...
287
00:14:29,023 --> 00:14:30,324
YEAH...
288
00:14:30,324 --> 00:14:32,927
GET A BUNCH OF PEOPLE TOGETHER
FROM WORK AND WE'LL ALL GO !
289
00:14:32,927 --> 00:14:34,228
I'D LOVE TO !...
290
00:14:34,228 --> 00:14:35,963
GO WITH EVERYONE.
291
00:14:35,963 --> 00:14:37,698
( beeping & vibrating )
292
00:14:37,698 --> 00:14:39,000
OH, IT'S THE CHIEF--
293
00:14:39,433 --> 00:14:41,602
I MEAN,
THE CHEF.
294
00:14:43,337 --> 00:14:44,205
WHAT IS IT, CHIEF ?
295
00:14:44,205 --> 00:14:45,940
THERE'S BEEN A SLIGHT
CHANGE IN PLANS.
296
00:14:46,374 --> 00:14:47,675
CLITORIS SWITCHED
THE MEETING WITH ARMANDO
297
00:14:47,675 --> 00:14:49,410
FROM MIDNIGHT TO 10:00.
298
00:14:49,410 --> 00:14:50,711
10:00 ?
299
00:14:50,711 --> 00:14:52,013
THAT'S ONLY
TWO MINUTES FROM NOW.
300
00:14:52,013 --> 00:14:53,748
I PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE
CALLED YOU SIX HOURS AGO
301
00:14:53,748 --> 00:14:55,049
WHEN I FIRST FOUND OUT,
302
00:14:55,049 --> 00:14:57,652
BUT I WAS WATCHING THE D.V.D.
OF "BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY."
303
00:14:57,652 --> 00:15:00,688
IT'S GOT OVER SIX HOURS
OF DELETED SCENES.
304
00:15:00,688 --> 00:15:02,857
DID YOU KNOW
THAT RENEE ZELLWEGER
305
00:15:02,857 --> 00:15:05,893
GAINED 475 POUNDS TO
PLAY THE PART OF--
306
00:15:18,039 --> 00:15:20,641
QUEEN CLITORIS ?
307
00:15:20,641 --> 00:15:24,545
ARMANDO, MY LOVE...
308
00:15:24,545 --> 00:15:26,714
GEWW...
309
00:15:27,148 --> 00:15:28,015
EWW...
310
00:15:28,449 --> 00:15:32,353
I MEAN-- OH, BABY, YOU ARE
JUST LIKE I REMEMBER YOU.
311
00:15:32,353 --> 00:15:35,823
YOU ARE SO SEXY...ISH.
312
00:15:36,257 --> 00:15:38,859
COME, JOIN ME.
313
00:15:47,535 --> 00:15:49,270
CHAMPAGNE, MY LOVE ?
314
00:15:49,270 --> 00:15:51,439
OH GOD, YES.
315
00:15:51,439 --> 00:15:53,174
( chug-a-lugging )
316
00:15:55,776 --> 00:15:58,813
KISS ME,
YOU LATIN HUNK.
317
00:15:58,813 --> 00:16:00,548
UHH...
318
00:16:20,501 --> 00:16:22,236
STRIPPERELLA, MY BABY !
319
00:16:22,236 --> 00:16:26,140
OH, HELP STRIPPERELLA,
MY BABY !
320
00:16:27,875 --> 00:16:30,911
MY BABY IS STUCK
IN THAT MAILBOX !
321
00:16:34,381 --> 00:16:37,418
I MEANT TO MAIL THIS PACKAGE
AND I GOT CONFUSED AND--
322
00:16:37,852 --> 00:16:39,587
OKAY,
I'LL SAVE YOUR BABY.
323
00:16:39,587 --> 00:16:41,756
BUT I'M IN A HURRY.
324
00:16:46,961 --> 00:16:50,431
ARMANDO,
YOU SEEM DISTRACTED.
325
00:16:50,431 --> 00:16:52,600
ONLY BY YOUR, UH...
326
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,769
BEAUTY ?
327
00:16:54,769 --> 00:16:57,805
LET'S GO BACK
TO MY SECRET EVIL LAIR.
328
00:16:58,239 --> 00:17:01,275
MAYBE WE SHOULD LINGER HERE
FOR A LITTLE-- AAH !
329
00:17:04,745 --> 00:17:06,914
( baby chatter )
330
00:17:10,818 --> 00:17:12,553
OH !
331
00:17:12,553 --> 00:17:15,589
OH, HONEY !
332
00:17:17,324 --> 00:17:19,927
ONE OTHER THING,
THERE WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING
333
00:17:19,927 --> 00:17:22,963
AND I WROTE A LETTER TO MY BOSS
CALLING HIM A "BIG, FAT IDIOT"
334
00:17:23,397 --> 00:17:26,000
AND I NEED IT BACK
OR I'LL BE FIRED.
335
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,735
CAN YOU HELP ME
FIND IT IN THERE ?
336
00:17:28,169 --> 00:17:29,904
NO !
337
00:17:31,205 --> 00:17:32,506
WELL,
THANKS FOR NOTHING !
338
00:17:39,546 --> 00:17:40,848
ARMANDO ?
339
00:17:44,318 --> 00:17:46,921
STRIPPERELLA, I GOT HERE
AS SOON AS I COULD.
340
00:17:46,921 --> 00:17:48,656
THEY'RE NOT HERE,
WE MISSED THEM !
341
00:17:48,656 --> 00:17:50,824
ARMANDO'S LATIN,
HUNKY LIFE IS IN DANGER
342
00:17:50,824 --> 00:17:52,559
AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT !
343
00:17:52,559 --> 00:17:53,427
NOT TO WORRY.
344
00:17:53,861 --> 00:17:56,463
WE REPLACED ARMANDO'S KIDNEY
WITH A TRACKING DEVICE.
345
00:17:56,463 --> 00:17:57,765
HIS KIDNEY ?
346
00:17:57,765 --> 00:17:59,500
YOU COULDN'T HAVE JUST
TAPED SOMETHING TO HIS BODY
347
00:17:59,934 --> 00:18:00,801
OR PUT SOMETHING
IN HIS POCKET ?
348
00:18:00,801 --> 00:18:03,404
HE ALREADY HAD STUFF
IN HIS POCKETS.
349
00:18:03,404 --> 00:18:04,705
NOW, QUIT WASTING TIME.
350
00:18:04,705 --> 00:18:08,609
GO SAVE ARMANDO AND LICK
CLITORIS ONCE AND FOR ALL !
351
00:18:15,115 --> 00:18:18,585
( woman on navigator )
Continue in the
straight direction.
352
00:18:19,887 --> 00:18:22,056
Take a left
at the next right.
353
00:18:23,357 --> 00:18:27,261
Ahead, you will find
a bushy hole.
354
00:18:27,261 --> 00:18:30,297
Armando is around
here, somewhere.
355
00:18:30,297 --> 00:18:34,201
ARMANDO'S GOTTA BE
AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.
356
00:18:36,370 --> 00:18:39,406
HE MUST BE INSIDE
THIS BUSHY TUNNEL.
357
00:18:45,479 --> 00:18:47,214
MMM, THAT WAS GREAT.
358
00:18:47,214 --> 00:18:50,250
LET'S DO IT AGAIN.
359
00:18:50,250 --> 00:18:52,853
IS NOT
THREE TIMES ENOUGH ?
360
00:18:52,853 --> 00:18:55,022
I SAID
LET'S DO IT AGAIN !
361
00:18:55,456 --> 00:18:57,191
( Stripperella )
YOU'LL BE DOING
NOTHING AGAIN !
362
00:18:57,191 --> 00:18:58,492
STRIPPERELLA !
363
00:18:58,492 --> 00:19:00,227
STRIPPERELLA
GET ME OUT OF HERE !
364
00:19:00,227 --> 00:19:01,528
GET YOU OUT OF HERE ?
365
00:19:01,962 --> 00:19:03,697
ARMANDO, I THOUGHT
WE HAD SOMETHING...
366
00:19:03,697 --> 00:19:07,167
NO, IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE TO
BE UP EARLY FOR WORK TOMORROW.
367
00:19:07,167 --> 00:19:08,469
I'LL CALL YOU...
I PROMISE.
368
00:19:08,469 --> 00:19:10,204
YOU'RE JUST LIKE
EVERY OTHER GUY.
369
00:19:10,204 --> 00:19:11,505
YOU JUST WANTED TO
HAVE SEX WITH ME,
370
00:19:11,505 --> 00:19:14,108
AND NOW YOU WANT
NOTHING TO DO WITH ME !
371
00:19:14,108 --> 00:19:16,710
I DID NOT WANT TO HAVE
THE SEX WITH YOU, TRUST ME.
372
00:19:16,710 --> 00:19:18,445
I'LL GIVE YOU
TWO CHOICES, CLITORIS.
373
00:19:18,445 --> 00:19:20,180
YOU CAN EITHER
COME QUIETLY,
374
00:19:20,180 --> 00:19:22,783
OR COME SCREAMING
AFTER I WORK YOU OVER.
375
00:19:22,783 --> 00:19:25,386
I'M NOT COMING AT ALL.
376
00:19:25,386 --> 00:19:27,121
I THINK I'LL CHOOSE
OPTION NUMBER THREE.
377
00:19:27,554 --> 00:19:29,289
THAT'S THE ONE WHERE
I KILL YOU BOTH !
378
00:19:29,723 --> 00:19:31,458
( screams like a woman )
379
00:19:31,458 --> 00:19:33,193
SHE'S GOT A GUN,
SHE'S GOT A GUN !
380
00:19:33,193 --> 00:19:35,362
GET OVER THERE
BY STRIPPERELLA.
381
00:19:35,362 --> 00:19:37,097
( whimpering )
382
00:19:37,097 --> 00:19:40,134
LET'S SEE,
WHO SHOULD I SHOOT FIRST ?
383
00:19:40,134 --> 00:19:42,736
( thinking )
DON'T STRESS, STRIPPERELLA,
JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATH.
384
00:19:43,170 --> 00:19:45,773
OH, I WISH
I HAD MY STRESS BALLS...
385
00:19:47,508 --> 00:19:49,243
SORRY, ARMANDO.
386
00:19:49,243 --> 00:19:50,978
( crunching )
387
00:19:50,978 --> 00:19:52,713
GAAAH !!!
388
00:19:52,713 --> 00:19:54,882
OOHHH !!!
389
00:19:55,749 --> 00:19:57,918
OH, I FEEL MUCH BETTER.
390
00:19:57,918 --> 00:19:59,219
WHAT WAS THAT
ALL ABOUT ?
391
00:19:59,219 --> 00:20:01,388
HAH !
392
00:20:01,388 --> 00:20:04,858
IT WAS ABOUT
CREATING A DIVERSION.
393
00:20:04,858 --> 00:20:07,461
NOW IT'S TIME TO GO
DOWNTOWN, CLITORIS.
394
00:20:07,461 --> 00:20:08,762
( groaning )
395
00:20:08,762 --> 00:20:10,931
( high-pitched voice )
CAN SOMEONE CALL A DOCTOR ?
396
00:20:10,931 --> 00:20:14,401
PREFERABLY
A SEXY FEMALE DOCTOR ?
397
00:20:27,848 --> 00:20:30,884
EXCUSE ME, I KNOW WE'RE
IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE,
398
00:20:31,318 --> 00:20:33,487
BUT DO YOU KNOW IF THERE'S
BATHROOM AROUND HERE ?
399
00:20:33,921 --> 00:20:36,090
UH-HUH...
400
00:20:37,825 --> 00:20:40,427
ISN'T THAT THE ABANDONED
INSANE ASYLUM
401
00:20:40,427 --> 00:20:43,030
WHERE ALL THOSE KIDS
WERE MURDERED 10 YEARS AGO
402
00:20:43,464 --> 00:20:44,331
THIS VERY NIGHT ?
403
00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,500
YEAH...
404
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:49,536
WELL, WHEN YOU GOTTA GO,
YOU GOTTA GO.
405
00:20:56,910 --> 00:20:59,947
LEONARD, PLEASE...
NOT SO TIGHT.
406
00:20:59,947 --> 00:21:04,718
( door creaks open in movie )
407
00:21:04,718 --> 00:21:06,019
OH, DON'T GO
IN THERE !
408
00:21:06,019 --> 00:21:07,321
DON'T GO IN THERE !
409
00:21:07,321 --> 00:21:08,622
( woman in movie )
Ahhh !
410
00:21:08,622 --> 00:21:12,092
OH, SHE WENT IN THERE...
411
00:21:12,092 --> 00:21:14,261
I'M REALLY GLAD
WE DID THIS.
412
00:21:14,261 --> 00:21:15,562
ME, TOO.
413
00:21:15,562 --> 00:21:16,864
Ahhh !
414
00:21:16,864 --> 00:21:19,032
( splat )
415
00:21:42,022 --> 00:21:44,625
♪ Stripperella ♪
416
00:21:45,926 --> 00:21:48,962
♪ Stripperella ♪
28723
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