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1
00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:14,300
- Pressure's all right, Gary?\N- It's perfect.
2
00:02:17,630 --> 00:02:22,510
- And the oil is not too warm?\N- It feels nice.
3
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:31,560
Is there any area in particular\Nyou want me to focus on today?
4
00:02:44,740 --> 00:02:45,910
You could...
5
00:02:49,579 --> 00:02:50,960
You could go...
6
00:02:54,170 --> 00:02:55,000
Lower?
7
00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:35,630
Oh, my God.
8
00:03:37,670 --> 00:03:40,050
I'm sorry, this music is triggering me.
9
00:03:40,930 --> 00:03:43,300
Can I change it\Nto something less traumatic?
10
00:03:44,510 --> 00:03:45,290
Sure.
11
00:03:45,490 --> 00:03:48,350
Kind of feels like\NI was getting you off at a funeral.
12
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,260
- You have a dope house, by the way.\N- Thank you.
13
00:03:55,460 --> 00:03:56,520
It's, like, sexy.
14
00:04:03,780 --> 00:04:04,780
Oh, God.
15
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:18,320
{\i1}Lick, lick, lick, lick{\i0}\N{\i1}I wanna eat your dick{\i0}
16
00:04:18,519 --> 00:04:20,920
{\i1}But I can't fuck up my nails{\i0}
17
00:04:24,090 --> 00:04:28,460
- I'm so sorry. Cory, is it?\N- Yeah, Kory. With a K.
18
00:04:28,660 --> 00:04:31,390
Could we just keep\Nthe distractions to a minimum?
19
00:04:32,060 --> 00:04:35,420
I'm sorry.\NI stopped taking my Vyvanse, and I have--
20
00:04:35,620 --> 00:04:36,940
It's okay. I'm just...
21
00:04:38,110 --> 00:04:40,320
- So the music, off?\N- Please?
22
00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:41,860
Yeah.
23
00:04:58,750 --> 00:05:02,300
I'm so sorry. Is there any way\Nthat you could not chew gum?
24
00:05:03,130 --> 00:05:04,590
Bitch, am I not allowed to breathe?
25
00:05:09,390 --> 00:05:12,210
- Gum's gone. Are we good?\N- Yeah. I'm sorry.
26
00:05:12,410 --> 00:05:15,270
- It's fine. Can I proceed?\N- Please. Thank you.
27
00:05:25,860 --> 00:05:29,120
So you have, like, a really big house.
28
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:32,290
Who all lives here?
29
00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:37,110
Just me.
30
00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:38,690
Damn!
31
00:05:38,890 --> 00:05:40,750
No husband? No wife?
32
00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:49,909
- Wife. I had a wife.\N- Word.
33
00:05:50,110 --> 00:05:53,850
I used to fuck girls too, and then\NI realised I sucked at eating pussy.
34
00:05:55,270 --> 00:05:57,500
She left. She took the kids, and--
35
00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:59,650
What a bitch. Boys or girls?
36
00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:02,130
Boys. Well, men now, really.
37
00:06:02,330 --> 00:06:03,380
Are they hot?
38
00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,320
- What?\N- Your two sons, are they hot?
39
00:06:06,070 --> 00:06:07,010
I don't know.
40
00:06:07,210 --> 00:06:10,560
Come on, Gary. You're clearly a fairy.\NOr at least now you are.
41
00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:11,850
They're my children!
42
00:06:12,050 --> 00:06:15,830
It's not perverted.\NMy cousins are so fucking hot.
43
00:06:16,750 --> 00:06:18,670
I mean, they're good-looking young men.
44
00:06:19,710 --> 00:06:20,710
Okay.
45
00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,800
Jesus!
46
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:29,930
Gary? How many guys\Nhave you done this with?
47
00:06:35,390 --> 00:06:36,170
One?
48
00:06:36,370 --> 00:06:38,880
- One, like...\N- Like, you're my first.
49
00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,520
- I'm your first massage?\N- No. I mean, yes, but...
50
00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:46,690
You're the first guy\Nthat I've ever been intimate with.
51
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:56,020
- Gary, shut up.\N- It's not a big deal.
52
00:06:56,220 --> 00:06:57,900
Gary, this is a big fucking deal.
53
00:06:58,100 --> 00:07:01,480
I need a drink. I need a drink.\NCome on. Come on! Holy shit.
54
00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:02,880
Where are you going?
55
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:06,210
So you've never touched a dick before?\NLike, even as a kid?
56
00:07:08,050 --> 00:07:08,820
No.
57
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:11,040
Oh, my God, Gary, that is so gay.
58
00:07:11,230 --> 00:07:12,450
I'm not supposed to drink, so--
59
00:07:12,650 --> 00:07:15,710
That is the most repressed Catholic-ass\Nbullshit I've ever heard in my life.
60
00:07:15,910 --> 00:07:18,250
I did jerk off once\Nin a steam room at our country club.
61
00:07:18,450 --> 00:07:20,670
Not even an Equinox? Jesus Christ, Gary.
62
00:07:20,870 --> 00:07:22,960
It was a long time ago.\NThe world's different now.
63
00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:25,470
Bitch, please.\NThe ancient Greeks were gay as shit.
64
00:07:25,670 --> 00:07:27,550
Zeus ate dick\Nfor breakfast, lunch, and dinner!
65
00:07:27,750 --> 00:07:29,100
That's why he was so strong.
66
00:07:29,290 --> 00:07:30,240
All the cum.
67
00:07:32,110 --> 00:07:34,530
- What?\N- You're a very spirited young man.
68
00:07:35,030 --> 00:07:36,140
You know what is so funny?
69
00:07:36,340 --> 00:07:39,540
People say shit like that all the time,\Nand I never know what it means.
70
00:07:45,170 --> 00:07:49,010
But this isn't about me.\NThis is about you.
71
00:07:49,630 --> 00:07:51,630
I wanna know, why now?
72
00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,370
I can't believe I'm telling you this.
73
00:07:54,570 --> 00:07:58,460
I got married so young, had kids so young\Nthat I never gave myself an opportunity--
74
00:07:58,659 --> 00:08:02,250
Holy shit! I didn't even think about that.\NYour kids are so lucky.
75
00:08:02,450 --> 00:08:03,590
- Why?\N- They have a gay dad.
76
00:08:03,790 --> 00:08:07,470
- What's better than that?\N- I doubt they see it that way, Kory.
77
00:08:07,670 --> 00:08:09,050
Please, call me Cameron.
78
00:08:09,250 --> 00:08:11,550
Kory's the work name,\Nit helps me get into character.
79
00:08:11,750 --> 00:08:13,160
But you and I are friends now.
80
00:08:14,620 --> 00:08:15,450
Okay.
81
00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:21,690
Well, Cameron,\Nmy kids don't talk to me, so...
82
00:08:21,890 --> 00:08:25,610
What? Sorry, you're telling me\Nthat your family won't talk to you
83
00:08:25,810 --> 00:08:28,200
because you prefer bussy over pussy?
84
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:29,320
What the actual fuck?
85
00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:32,490
Patty had her reasons. She took the kids--
86
00:08:32,690 --> 00:08:36,700
God! Patty? Oh, Patty!\NPatty's a very, very cunty name, Gary.
87
00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:40,669
- Cameron.\N- No! I'm sorry, Gary, that is bullshit.
88
00:08:40,870 --> 00:08:42,630
Bullshit.
89
00:08:42,830 --> 00:08:45,920
You were honest, and they turn their back\Non you 'cause of your sexuality?
90
00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:48,760
I'll talk to that bitch.\NI'm a people person. Give me your phone.
91
00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:50,130
No. You don't have to--
92
00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:52,180
The only thing better\Nthan my dad being gay
93
00:08:52,380 --> 00:08:54,470
would have been him being\Nlike a reiki master.
94
00:08:54,670 --> 00:08:57,160
I would have killed\Nto have a dad like you.
95
00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:00,990
I'm dying.
96
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,900
Oh, baby, I'm dying too.\NI mean, every night I fall asleep--
97
00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:06,580
I'm actually dying.
98
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,630
I have an inoperable brain tumour.
99
00:09:14,170 --> 00:09:15,180
Oh, shit.
100
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:30,300
I'm sorry.\NI really don't know what to say.
101
00:09:30,500 --> 00:09:32,380
Words of affirmation\Nis not my love language.
102
00:09:32,580 --> 00:09:33,820
It's more like...
103
00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:40,230
Okay. You don't have to worry about\Nnot knowing how to respond.
104
00:09:40,430 --> 00:09:43,150
Nobody's reacted that well thus far,\Nmyself included.
105
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,690
Oh, Gary. Are you okay?
106
00:09:45,890 --> 00:09:48,290
I mean, I know you're not okay, obviously.\NBut I mean...
107
00:09:49,250 --> 00:09:53,450
It's like I just realised that\NI've been alive for nearly half a century
108
00:09:53,650 --> 00:09:56,430
and I haven't actually lived\Neven a second of it.
109
00:09:58,220 --> 00:10:02,250
Okay. Okay, Gary.\NGary, I'm gonna help you.
110
00:10:02,450 --> 00:10:04,880
- What?\N- Let's find someone for you.
111
00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:07,920
Someone you've always wanted\Nwho will put what you want first.
112
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:11,090
Honestly, can't you just finish\Nthe hand job and go?
113
00:10:11,290 --> 00:10:15,550
Oh, shut up.\NShut up, Gary. We're doing this.
114
00:10:15,750 --> 00:10:17,240
You are gonna do this.
115
00:10:17,740 --> 00:10:21,140
Now, have you heard of Plungr?
116
00:10:21,340 --> 00:10:22,350
No.
117
00:10:22,550 --> 00:10:23,480
It's a sex app.
118
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:27,160
Why do I need a sex app?\NI literally paid for you.
119
00:10:27,790 --> 00:10:30,730
Because you're not gay\Nuntil you've hooked up
120
00:10:30,930 --> 00:10:34,210
with a complete stranger on an app,\Nwho looks nothing like their pictures.
121
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,240
- Okay.\N- Okay, so crash course.
122
00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:39,870
Basically, once you set up your profile,\Nthen you put in your stats.
123
00:10:40,070 --> 00:10:40,950
That's the basics.
124
00:10:41,150 --> 00:10:44,500
Your height, your body type,\Nyour pronouns, your positions.
125
00:10:44,700 --> 00:10:47,170
- Top, bottom. We'll figure it out later.\N- Jesus.
126
00:10:47,370 --> 00:10:50,750
Your relationship status,\Ndate last tested, et cetera.
127
00:10:50,950 --> 00:10:54,130
And boom! You're getting your hole licked,\Nyour salad tossed,
128
00:10:54,330 --> 00:10:56,550
your carpet munched\Nby your closeted neighbour--
129
00:10:56,750 --> 00:10:58,510
I'm sorry, this is a lot to take in.
130
00:10:58,710 --> 00:11:01,530
It's a lot, Gary.\NI wish they had a gay Duolingo.
131
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,120
You know what?
132
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,210
Why don't you see for yourself?
133
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:10,960
Go on.
134
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,310
Oh, my God. There's so many hot guys.
135
00:11:26,890 --> 00:11:28,040
Yes, there are.
136
00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:31,190
But if you wanna talk to any of them,\Nyou're gonna need an avatar.
137
00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:34,900
Profile picture. You're gonna need it,\Nor no one's gonna answer.
138
00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:39,090
Do you know what lighting in your house\Nmakes you the most dewy?
139
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:42,430
- Can we just use a picture of you?\N- Seriously?
140
00:11:42,630 --> 00:11:45,640
Look at you.\NI'm not gonna get very many responses.
141
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,600
Not with that attitude.\NDo you know your angles?
142
00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:50,810
- My angles?\N- Oh, for fuck's sake, Gary.
143
00:11:51,010 --> 00:11:53,290
Come on,\NI can't just teach you everything.
144
00:11:57,380 --> 00:11:58,210
Hot?
145
00:11:59,050 --> 00:12:01,410
Yeah, that's very hot.
146
00:12:01,610 --> 00:12:02,380
I know.
147
00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:08,180
I'll just call us "Lad and Dad."
148
00:12:09,390 --> 00:12:10,230
Okay.
149
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:16,770
How about this guy?
150
00:12:17,900 --> 00:12:19,470
{\an8}Two miles away.
151
00:12:19,670 --> 00:12:23,220
{\an8}"Dom Top, DL, Masc4masc, I love to suck."
152
00:12:23,420 --> 00:12:25,600
- What's DL?\N- That's down-low, just like you.
153
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,830
Well, I like his hat.
154
00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:31,500
Okay.
155
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:35,460
"I like your hat, bro. You're hot."
156
00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,240
- "You too."\N- Wait, he already wrote back to you?
157
00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:45,010
Yep. "Come over and drain me."
158
00:12:45,510 --> 00:12:49,000
Okay, I'm sorry. No, Cameron,\NI think this might be too much.
159
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,920
- Too late. He's on his way.\N- Wait. What?
160
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:51,830
I dropped a pin.
161
00:12:52,030 --> 00:12:53,290
- You gave him my address?\N- Yeah.
162
00:12:53,490 --> 00:12:55,210
But I might not be ready for this.
163
00:12:55,410 --> 00:12:57,670
It took me a week\Nto work up the courage to call you.
164
00:12:57,870 --> 00:13:01,590
And now you've invited\Nsome complete stranger to my home.
165
00:13:01,790 --> 00:13:03,800
- Gary.\N- I don't even know this person.
166
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,760
- How am I supposed to react?\N- Loosen up.
167
00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:07,220
- How?\N- You're with me.
168
00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:12,860
I'm like human poppers. I open anyone up.\NAll you have to do is sit back and relax.
169
00:13:13,050 --> 00:13:14,040
Relax.
170
00:13:14,540 --> 00:13:16,630
You're gonna be okay, I prom.
171
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:18,540
Prom?
172
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:20,240
Half a promise.
173
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:23,320
- Did you just make that up?\N- Oh, my God. It's New York, Gary.
174
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:26,260
The reality star.\NOh, you have so much to learn.
175
00:13:26,930 --> 00:13:28,350
I'm going to your kitchen.
176
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,900
Gary, it's so harsh in here.\NYou need to liven it up.
177
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:48,200
{\i1}Spoon, spoon, spoon...{\i0}
178
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:52,160
Shit. You really are dying, aren't you?
179
00:14:04,670 --> 00:14:06,580
{\an8}"Gary and Patricia had\Na beautiful marriage,
180
00:14:06,770 --> 00:14:08,080
{\an8}filled with blessing and love.
181
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:11,710
The life they shared was harmonious\Nand fulfilling, raising the boys.
182
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:16,640
However, Gary has now left the marriage\Nto finally pursue his life as a gay man.
183
00:14:18,060 --> 00:14:20,920
There are no words to describe\Nthe shock and heartache Patricia feels
184
00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:22,690
{\an8}regarding Gary's new path."
185
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,190
Yikademente.
186
00:14:26,570 --> 00:14:28,360
Gary! Oh, my God.
187
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:33,020
Okay, can we please talk about this?\NBecause what the actual fuck?
188
00:14:33,220 --> 00:14:35,330
- Where did you get that?\N- I went through your shit.
189
00:14:35,950 --> 00:14:36,790
Of course.
190
00:14:39,580 --> 00:14:44,660
After the split, Patty lashed out\Nin interesting and craft-based ways.
191
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:47,030
It's on, like, weighted paper.
192
00:14:47,230 --> 00:14:50,080
You're telling me she went to Kinko's\Nand printed how many copies?
193
00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:53,290
She sent them\Nto quite a number of people in our lives.
194
00:14:53,490 --> 00:14:57,270
Gary, it's like a eulogy for straight you.\NRest in peace.
195
00:14:57,770 --> 00:15:00,440
- Well...\N- At least you got to keep the house.
196
00:15:00,940 --> 00:15:05,090
When I came out of the closet, I lost\Nthe closet and the room the closet was in.
197
00:15:05,290 --> 00:15:07,010
Is that why you ended up doing this?
198
00:15:07,210 --> 00:15:09,050
The fuck do you mean by that?
199
00:15:09,250 --> 00:15:13,020
Your line of work is not exactly\Nmany people's first choice.
200
00:15:13,220 --> 00:15:15,060
A little fucking judgemental,\Ndon't you think?
201
00:15:15,260 --> 00:15:19,160
I'm just saying,\Nkids wanna be astronauts, firemen.
202
00:15:19,660 --> 00:15:21,750
They don't pick sex worker\Nat the job fair.
203
00:15:22,710 --> 00:15:26,840
They would if they were tossed around\Nas an 8-year-old, like I was.
204
00:15:29,420 --> 00:15:33,200
I'm fucking joking. Are you serious?\NThat's what you actually think?
205
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,250
That something terrible must have happened\Nto me to lead me to this?
206
00:15:36,450 --> 00:15:39,630
God forbid I found something\Nthat I'm good at, and I monetised it.
207
00:15:39,830 --> 00:15:42,670
But you can't do this forever.\NWhen you're my age, what will you do?
208
00:15:42,870 --> 00:15:47,050
I don't know. I guess I'll repress\Nevery desire that comes naturally,
209
00:15:47,250 --> 00:15:49,680
marry an unsuspecting woman,\Nhave two sons,
210
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,850
live a lie\Nuntil I find out I'm dying of cancer.
211
00:15:52,050 --> 00:15:55,560
- Hey, whoa.\N- No! No, you are on thin ice, sweetie.
212
00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,150
I'm sorry. You're right.
213
00:15:58,340 --> 00:16:03,040
I guess that\Nthat was my poor attempt at helping you.
214
00:16:04,790 --> 00:16:07,590
Well, write this down\Nand remember it fondly:
215
00:16:08,340 --> 00:16:10,260
I don't need your fucking help.
216
00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:14,390
God!
217
00:16:26,020 --> 00:16:28,630
My God, if that was my best stab\Nat fatherly advice,
218
00:16:28,830 --> 00:16:31,010
it's no wonder\Nmy own kids don't wanna speak to me.
219
00:16:31,210 --> 00:16:33,740
Okay, enough of this whole pity party.
220
00:16:34,740 --> 00:16:35,620
What is that?
221
00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:38,640
It's called pre-workout.
222
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:41,310
- Like meth for people with goals.\N- Why are you taking it now?
223
00:16:41,510 --> 00:16:44,820
You didn't have Red Bull.\NWhich, by the way, big mistake.
224
00:16:45,020 --> 00:16:47,150
- Big. Huge.\N{\i1}- Pretty Woman.{\i0}
225
00:16:47,350 --> 00:16:49,610
Finally, a fucking reference you know.
226
00:16:49,810 --> 00:16:51,820
{\i1}Pretty Woman{\i0} is one of my favourite films.
227
00:16:52,020 --> 00:16:54,240
That would explain\Nyour attitude towards sex work.
228
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:57,950
- Well, you're the one who just quoted it.\N- Touché, bitch.
229
00:16:58,150 --> 00:17:01,790
- Yeah.\N- Oh, fuck. He's here. He's here!
230
00:17:01,990 --> 00:17:03,130
Oh, my God, what do I do?
231
00:17:03,330 --> 00:17:06,760
Hey. Go upstairs,\Nwear something sexy, I got this covered.
232
00:17:06,950 --> 00:17:08,900
- Go! Go!\N- Okay.
233
00:17:14,069 --> 00:17:15,109
Sexy.
234
00:17:18,660 --> 00:17:20,700
- Hello.\N- 'Sup, bro?
235
00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:24,980
- Fist me already!\N- I'm Sammy.
236
00:17:25,180 --> 00:17:29,090
I'm Kory, with a K. The lost Kardashian.\NNice truck.
237
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,740
You parked so far.
238
00:17:31,940 --> 00:17:35,090
- Just wanna get in and get out.\N- Oh. You can get in, all right.
239
00:17:39,300 --> 00:17:40,140
Come on.
240
00:17:42,430 --> 00:17:46,020
This place is dope, man.\NDo you live here alone?
241
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:51,520
Well, if you noticed on Plungr,\NI am Lad...
242
00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:56,650
and this is Dad.
243
00:17:58,570 --> 00:17:59,640
Hi.
244
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:03,100
Who the fuck is\Nthis Mister Rogers-looking-ass dude?
245
00:18:03,300 --> 00:18:05,810
I thought I told you\Nto wear something sexy.
246
00:18:06,010 --> 00:18:07,480
I feel very sexy in this.
247
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:10,650
The profile said "Lad and Dad."
248
00:18:10,850 --> 00:18:13,360
You didn't say\Nnothing about a threesome, so...
249
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:15,870
And you didn't say anything\Nabout being a whiny bottom.
250
00:18:16,070 --> 00:18:18,370
- But here we are.\N- I'm no bottom! I'm all top.
251
00:18:18,570 --> 00:18:21,710
- Yeah, sure, you self-hating little bitch.\N- Cameron.
252
00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:23,040
Shut the fuck up, please.
253
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:28,310
We both know you're just a gaping hole,\Nso pipe down and service this cock!
254
00:18:32,730 --> 00:18:34,300
Fuck, you're sexy.
255
00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:36,850
You know you don't deserve\Nto suck this cock, though, right?
256
00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:37,820
I know.
257
00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:43,030
I'm sorry, sir.\NI'll suck it so good, though.
258
00:18:43,870 --> 00:18:44,700
Do it.
259
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:49,920
- Thank you, sir.\N- Thank you.
260
00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:59,680
Oh, yeah. Fuck, yeah.
261
00:19:03,470 --> 00:19:06,000
You shut your fucking mouth\Nwhen you're sucking this dick.
262
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,210
- Please, sir, I want some more.\N- Yeah, you do.
263
00:19:09,410 --> 00:19:13,300
Yeah, you like that dick,\Nyou little Oliver Twist-ass bitch?
264
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:17,030
Oh, God. It's like a juicy bratwurst.
265
00:19:18,150 --> 00:19:22,450
You make me...\NYou make me sick, you little orphan boy.
266
00:19:23,450 --> 00:19:24,780
I'm an orphan.
267
00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:27,730
Fucking deeper, bitch.
268
00:19:27,930 --> 00:19:29,360
You little street urchin.
269
00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:33,040
You little begging bitch\Nwith your little purple-ass shorts.
270
00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:36,670
I'm your fucking street urchin,\Nmotherfucker.
271
00:19:39,550 --> 00:19:40,550
Come on, Dad.
272
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:42,510
Come on.
273
00:19:44,050 --> 00:19:45,260
- Fuck me.\N- It's okay.
274
00:19:47,140 --> 00:19:50,770
Oh, yes. You gotta\Nput it fucking deep in there.
275
00:19:55,860 --> 00:19:57,510
Wait. Why are you stopping?
276
00:19:57,710 --> 00:19:59,550
- I can't do this.\N- Can't do what?
277
00:19:59,750 --> 00:20:01,600
Suck a dick\Nwhen your username's Looking2Succ?
278
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,810
Not with this\Naccountant-looking motherfucker.
279
00:20:04,010 --> 00:20:06,350
- I'm sorry.\N- Gary is a beautiful man
280
00:20:06,550 --> 00:20:09,020
who deserves anonymous blowjobs,\Njust like the rest of us.
281
00:20:09,220 --> 00:20:10,310
He looks like shit.
282
00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:15,400
- You look like shit, little pencil dick!\N- What? I'm not even fully hard, bro.
283
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:16,490
Oh, really?
284
00:20:16,690 --> 00:20:19,570
Plus, I didn't get\Nto showcase my personality.
285
00:20:19,770 --> 00:20:20,820
Oh, my God!
286
00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:24,950
Looking2Succ, I've given you plenty\Nof time to showcase your personality.
287
00:20:25,150 --> 00:20:29,080
Fuck you. I'm better one-on-one.\NAnd it was just you in the picture.
288
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:32,790
Not your {\i1}Flowers in the Attic{\i0}\Nfucking sidepiece daddy.
289
00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:34,550
I'm not even gay, anyway.
290
00:20:34,750 --> 00:20:37,470
You just casually referenced\N{\i1}Flowers in the Attic.{\i0}
291
00:20:37,670 --> 00:20:40,590
- You are an absolute faggot!\N- I got a wife.
292
00:20:40,790 --> 00:20:42,260
- So does he!\N- Ex-wife.
293
00:20:42,460 --> 00:20:46,430
And you'll be adding ex to the title\Nwhen she finds out you're a bottom!
294
00:20:46,630 --> 00:20:48,640
Watch your fucking mouth, bro!
295
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,100
I'm warning you, I will knock you out.
296
00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:56,650
Oh, no. He's gonna knock me out, Gary,\Nhit me with his {\i1}Flowers in the Attic.{\i0}
297
00:20:56,850 --> 00:20:57,650
Okay. Boys. Boys.
298
00:20:57,850 --> 00:21:04,450
- You are a F-A-double G-O-T, faggot!\N- This is your last fucking warning, bro!
299
00:21:04,650 --> 00:21:06,510
- You're a faggot!\N- Fuck you!
300
00:21:53,390 --> 00:21:54,730
It was a gorgeous landing.
301
00:22:02,360 --> 00:22:05,850
- Why would you do that?\N- Do what?
302
00:22:06,050 --> 00:22:08,350
You instigated him. You riled him up.
303
00:22:08,550 --> 00:22:09,810
Hey, hold on, hold on.
304
00:22:10,010 --> 00:22:12,560
He literally charged at me\Nand you pushed me out of the way.
305
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:14,040
How is this my fault?
306
00:22:14,830 --> 00:22:17,960
If you had shut up,\Nhe wouldn't have done the charging.
307
00:22:18,830 --> 00:22:20,780
Of course, you're gonna take his side.
308
00:22:20,980 --> 00:22:23,820
Two repressed queers blaming\Ntheir shame and misery on me,
309
00:22:24,020 --> 00:22:26,280
- a secure, stable homosexual.\N- Stable?
310
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:29,390
- Yeah.\N- How did I let this happen? My God!
311
00:22:30,090 --> 00:22:32,500
Wait, this whole thing was your idea.\NThe whole thing.
312
00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:34,500
No, no, no! You wanted him to come here.
313
00:22:34,700 --> 00:22:37,000
You practically forced me into this.
314
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:40,130
Oh, I forced you\Nto hook up with two hot dudes.
315
00:22:40,330 --> 00:22:43,020
I'm so evil, Gary. Oh, I'm so sorry.
316
00:22:49,450 --> 00:22:50,810
What are you doing?
317
00:22:51,010 --> 00:22:53,350
- I'm calling 911.\N- For what? He's dead!
318
00:22:53,550 --> 00:22:55,650
Exactly. We have to explain what happened.
319
00:22:55,850 --> 00:23:00,320
You may be okay going to jail 'cause\Nyou're dying, but I'm freshly made.
320
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,030
- I don't care. I'm calling.\N- Gary, no. Accidents happen!
321
00:23:03,230 --> 00:23:05,860
It was your first time being gay.\NYou were gonna make mistakes.
322
00:23:06,060 --> 00:23:08,370
- This is more than a mistake!\N- You're right.
323
00:23:08,570 --> 00:23:10,540
I'm so glad\Nyou're man enough to admit that.
324
00:23:10,730 --> 00:23:12,640
- Admit what?\N- You assaulted me.
325
00:23:14,390 --> 00:23:16,880
- You fucking kidding me?\N- You pushed me, babe.
326
00:23:17,070 --> 00:23:21,270
You pushed me and my lover is dead!\NThat's what I'm gonna tell the cops.
327
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:27,180
I can't believe that you would pin this\Non me when all I did was protect you.
328
00:23:27,380 --> 00:23:28,760
Protect me, really?
329
00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:30,970
He was gonna beat you up.\NI saved your life.
330
00:23:31,170 --> 00:23:32,310
Don't be so dramatic, Gary.
331
00:23:32,510 --> 00:23:34,560
You both would have flown out\Nof that window,
332
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:36,480
which now seems like a missed opportunity!
333
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:38,830
Okay, so don't ever try\Nand save my life again, then!
334
00:23:39,460 --> 00:23:41,370
I pray that I don't have the chance!
335
00:23:42,750 --> 00:23:44,590
No, Cameron,\Nyou can't walk away from this.
336
00:23:45,460 --> 00:23:46,750
It's your fault!
337
00:23:47,550 --> 00:23:51,930
You know what? You say that one more time,\NI swear to God!
338
00:23:52,430 --> 00:23:56,290
When you first told me about your family,\NI felt bad for you. I really did.
339
00:23:56,490 --> 00:23:58,080
But you know what? I feel bad for them,
340
00:23:58,280 --> 00:24:01,750
'cause you're that classic closet case\Nthat loves to look like the hero
341
00:24:01,950 --> 00:24:03,090
while playing the victim.
342
00:24:03,290 --> 00:24:07,090
Maybe accept the fact that\Nyou ruined more lives than you saved.
343
00:24:07,290 --> 00:24:09,780
You don't know a fucking thing\Nabout me and my family.
344
00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:12,160
Oh, thank God for that.
345
00:24:12,820 --> 00:24:15,580
It's your house, Gary. Your window.
346
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:19,000
Every man for himself.\NI'm fucking out of here.
347
00:24:19,790 --> 00:24:22,520
You are a pest! You are a menace!
348
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,070
You are a selfish, spoiled boy,\Nand I have no use for you!
349
00:24:25,270 --> 00:24:28,210
I don't wanna see you or know you!\NGet out of my house!
350
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:31,220
- Is that from{\i1} Dennis the Menace?{\i0}\N- Go!
351
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:34,390
Fuck you, Gary!
352
00:25:40,740 --> 00:25:41,910
Oh, God.
353
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:43,830
Okay.
354
00:25:44,410 --> 00:25:45,250
Okay.
355
00:26:09,860 --> 00:26:10,900
Fuck.
356
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:20,950
So where are we taking him?
357
00:26:22,030 --> 00:26:23,520
- Why?\N- Don't look at me like that.
358
00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:27,710
You're weak, I feel sorry for you,\Nand thank you for saving my life.
359
00:26:28,670 --> 00:26:31,960
I think he shit himself.\NJust grab his hands, come on.
360
00:26:34,550 --> 00:26:35,630
Fuck!
361
00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:40,290
Okay. So should we drag him to the shore,
362
00:26:40,490 --> 00:26:42,870
fill his pockets with rocks,\Nand then throw him in the lake?
363
00:26:43,070 --> 00:26:46,130
What? Did you just come up with that?
364
00:26:46,330 --> 00:26:47,420
Yeah. Why?
365
00:26:47,620 --> 00:26:49,750
Because that's almost exactly\Nwhat we did with Duke.
366
00:26:49,950 --> 00:26:52,720
- Who the fuck is Duke?\N- My only real friend.
367
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:56,680
- Who the fuck are you, Robert Durst?\N- Jesus Christ, Cameron!
368
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,760
Duke was a Weimaraner,\Nwho I loved very, very much.
369
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:02,680
- A who?\N- A dog. Duke was a dog.
370
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,480
He loved the water.\NIt was a fitting send-off.
371
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:07,810
But dogs don't wear pants.
372
00:27:08,010 --> 00:27:09,790
Oh, God. Cameron, pick him up.
373
00:27:11,670 --> 00:27:15,570
We're dealing with a human body,\Na human dead body.
374
00:27:15,770 --> 00:27:18,990
He's gonna smell. He's gonna rot.
375
00:27:19,190 --> 00:27:23,500
He's got a family, a wife who probably\Nhates him but doesn't want him dead.
376
00:27:23,700 --> 00:27:25,970
Are we talking about the body or you?
377
00:27:42,990 --> 00:27:44,740
I should just take the fall.
378
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:49,150
No. I don't want Patty\Nto have to make another calling card.
379
00:27:49,350 --> 00:27:54,280
"After a few months as a homosexual man,\NGary decided to lead a life of crime."
380
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:57,090
With a wilted rose\Nas the background this time?
381
00:27:57,670 --> 00:27:58,960
Stunning.
382
00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,310
I'm really glad you came back.
383
00:28:16,690 --> 00:28:17,860
Me too.
384
00:28:23,660 --> 00:28:25,850
Oh, fuck! He bled through the tarp!
385
00:28:26,050 --> 00:28:28,730
That's mountain ash wood,\Nit's really porous.
386
00:28:28,930 --> 00:28:32,500
Oh, my God, you're so gay.\NHow did nobody know?
387
00:28:33,670 --> 00:28:35,880
Shut up and help me move this thing.
388
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:12,020
Oh, my God.\NDid you invite somebody else over?
389
00:29:12,220 --> 00:29:14,360
- You think I double-booked you?\N- Well, did you?
390
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:15,270
Of course I didn't.
391
00:29:15,470 --> 00:29:17,490
- Answer it.\N- I don't wanna answer it.
392
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:19,750
We can't answer the door.\NI have no idea who it is.
393
00:29:21,210 --> 00:29:22,370
Oh, fuck.
394
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:24,180
Avon lady calling!
395
00:29:25,510 --> 00:29:26,450
It's Sandy.
396
00:29:26,650 --> 00:29:28,620
- Who the fuck is Sandy?\N- My neighbour.
397
00:29:28,820 --> 00:29:29,890
Oh, shit.
398
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:31,500
Gary!
399
00:29:31,700 --> 00:29:35,060
What am I supposed to do?\NI'm completely covered in blood.
400
00:29:35,810 --> 00:29:36,940
I know what to do.
401
00:29:37,810 --> 00:29:39,170
Where are you going?
402
00:29:39,370 --> 00:29:42,180
Gary? Is that you?
403
00:29:42,380 --> 00:29:44,180
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
404
00:29:44,380 --> 00:29:46,930
Hello? Gary?
405
00:29:47,130 --> 00:29:49,230
- That's Patty's apron.\N- Not anymore.
406
00:29:49,420 --> 00:29:51,310
- What are you gonna do?\N- Answer the door.
407
00:29:51,510 --> 00:29:56,670
- No, no, you can't answer the door.\N- I'm gonna answer the fucking door.
408
00:30:00,420 --> 00:30:01,200
Hi.
409
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:02,780
You're not Gary.
410
00:30:02,980 --> 00:30:06,740
No. No, no, no.\NI'm cute, and you must be pretty.
411
00:30:06,940 --> 00:30:09,510
So together that means we're pretty cute.
412
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:18,840
You're a hoot! I'm Sandy.
413
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:22,940
Oh, Sandy, what brings you over here\Nthis beautiful night?
414
00:30:23,780 --> 00:30:26,610
I should be asking you the same question.
415
00:30:29,910 --> 00:30:32,350
That's so like Gary. A man of few words.
416
00:30:32,550 --> 00:30:36,730
I'm his real estate agent, Kory.\NKory Haim.
417
00:30:36,930 --> 00:30:39,940
- Like the actor?\N- No, you're thinking of Feldman.
418
00:30:40,140 --> 00:30:41,780
No, there was two Coreys.
419
00:30:41,980 --> 00:30:45,760
- There was Corey Feldman and Corey Haim.\N- No, there's just one.
420
00:30:46,550 --> 00:30:49,240
- Thank you for coming.\N- Gary!
421
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:54,120
Hey, you're not in that gorgeous\Nlittle palazzo across the way, are you?
422
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:57,710
Where is Gary?\NAnd why are you here so late at night?
423
00:30:57,910 --> 00:31:01,510
Oh, I'm doing an inspection. Smog.
424
00:31:01,710 --> 00:31:05,840
You know, I thought I heard\Nthe faint sounds of screaming earlier,
425
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:08,010
and I thought, well, Gary's home,
426
00:31:08,210 --> 00:31:12,770
so naturally I thought I would come on by\Non my way to the store.
427
00:31:12,970 --> 00:31:16,600
But I gotta hit the road\Nbefore the Ambien kicks in.
428
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:20,780
- I think it already kicked in.\N- Stat! Like they say on {\i1}Grey's.{\i0}
429
00:31:20,970 --> 00:31:23,460
Oh! Are you a McDreamy girl?
430
00:31:24,300 --> 00:31:25,860
All the way.
431
00:31:26,060 --> 00:31:28,170
I could see it in your eyes, Sandy.
432
00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:35,560
I just need some flour...
433
00:31:36,350 --> 00:31:40,170
to make my chocolate chip banana bread\Nfor my church group in the morning.
434
00:31:40,370 --> 00:31:43,710
Sure, yeah. Not keto, but very Christian.
435
00:31:43,910 --> 00:31:48,190
We just pray so hard\Nthat the carbs don't stick to our hips.
436
00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:56,230
You know what? I just realised something.
437
00:31:56,430 --> 00:31:58,520
- I know where Gary keeps the flour.\N- Wow.
438
00:31:58,720 --> 00:32:02,020
Yeah.\NSo why don't you just wait right here?
439
00:32:02,220 --> 00:32:05,740
- Right here. Sit, stay.\N- Right there. Sit, stay. Sit, stay.
440
00:32:05,940 --> 00:32:09,920
Don't move. Good girl. Good girl.\NI'll be right back. Yeah, okay.
441
00:32:14,180 --> 00:32:15,800
He's wearing an apron.
442
00:32:19,980 --> 00:32:21,520
One more won't hurt.
443
00:32:25,980 --> 00:32:27,650
Shit, shit, shit.
444
00:32:30,030 --> 00:32:32,400
Where is the flour? Fuck, fuck, fuck!
445
00:32:32,990 --> 00:32:35,410
- I know.\N- What?
446
00:32:36,530 --> 00:32:40,230
You don't have to hide it.\NI caught you red-handed.
447
00:32:40,430 --> 00:32:44,940
Okay. Look, it was a whole mistake,\Nand one thing lead to another--
448
00:32:45,140 --> 00:32:48,420
The heart wants what the heart wants.
449
00:32:49,550 --> 00:32:52,490
- What?\N- I got Patty's card.
450
00:32:52,690 --> 00:32:54,340
The whole neighbourhood did.
451
00:32:54,930 --> 00:32:57,370
You don't have to be ashamed\Nof loving him.
452
00:32:57,570 --> 00:33:00,390
Gary's a wonderful man.
453
00:33:03,310 --> 00:33:05,000
I'm so close to Patty still.
454
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:07,970
She's just sick over the whole thing.
455
00:33:08,170 --> 00:33:10,590
She feels terribly about what she did\Nand how she reacted.
456
00:33:10,790 --> 00:33:13,140
But now he won't talk to her or the boys.
457
00:33:13,340 --> 00:33:14,810
And I know he's hurt,
458
00:33:15,010 --> 00:33:18,390
but she really worries about him,\Nespecially now all by himself--
459
00:33:18,590 --> 00:33:21,870
I'm sorry. Patty...\NPatty wants to talk to Gary?
460
00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:26,780
Oh, more than anything.
461
00:33:26,980 --> 00:33:31,510
She's been begging him\Nto at least just clear the air before he--
462
00:33:32,510 --> 00:33:33,800
You know, just...
463
00:33:35,510 --> 00:33:36,890
Right. That's...
464
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:39,870
I didn't know that.
465
00:33:40,070 --> 00:33:41,460
I did not know that.
466
00:33:41,660 --> 00:33:44,850
Well, must be awkward.
467
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:47,840
- For Gary.\N- Yeah.
468
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:52,480
He must not tell you things about the ex.
469
00:33:53,740 --> 00:33:54,930
- Yeah.\N- Yeah.
470
00:33:55,130 --> 00:34:01,950
So all that's to say,\Nno more sneaking around, Mr Estate Agent.
471
00:34:02,450 --> 00:34:06,190
I'm a cool Christian.\NI'm down with the gays.
472
00:34:06,390 --> 00:34:09,590
I may just not bake a cake\Nfor your wedding.
473
00:34:10,540 --> 00:34:13,489
Yeah, well, you already established\Nyou don't have any flour.
474
00:34:13,690 --> 00:34:15,870
Yeah! You got me there!
475
00:34:16,070 --> 00:34:20,120
Oh, where's Gary?\NI wanna see you two sinners in action.
476
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:21,500
Gary!
477
00:34:21,699 --> 00:34:24,020
What the fuck?
478
00:34:27,139 --> 00:34:29,480
- Gary.\N- Sandy!
479
00:34:30,860 --> 00:34:34,860
Honey! You did not spill all those cosmos!
480
00:34:35,739 --> 00:34:36,570
Cosmos?
481
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:41,770
Yes! You got the whole pitcher\Nright down the front of you.
482
00:34:41,969 --> 00:34:43,639
- Cosmos?\N- Yes.
483
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:47,310
Yes, we were having\N{\i1}Sex and the City {\i0}role-play night.
484
00:34:47,510 --> 00:34:48,460
Yes.
485
00:34:56,300 --> 00:34:59,290
Well, let's get another pitcher going,
486
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:05,180
because I'm Samantha, and I love fucking.
487
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:10,800
Yes, you do, you little scamp.
488
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:14,190
Church girls know how to kneel.
489
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:19,640
I'm gonna just make\Nsome more cosmos, then.
490
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:22,520
- You are such a fucking Charlotte.\N- This is so exciting!
491
00:35:22,720 --> 00:35:26,830
It's been ages\Nsince I've had a girls' night like this.
492
00:35:28,830 --> 00:35:30,440
Where's the bathroom again?
493
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:35,240
I... When I get excited,\NI get a little loose down there.
494
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:36,820
Oh, Jesus.
495
00:35:37,020 --> 00:35:39,620
Okay, I'm gonna just cue up\Nthe second movie.
496
00:35:39,820 --> 00:35:41,240
Everyone's favourite.
497
00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:43,140
Bathroom's right to the left.
498
00:35:46,720 --> 00:35:48,680
Right to the left.
499
00:35:52,940 --> 00:35:54,150
Right to the left.
500
00:35:57,480 --> 00:35:59,260
Why are we watching {\i1}Sex and the City 2?{\i0}
501
00:35:59,460 --> 00:36:01,760
You are being such an Aidan.\NI need you to be a Mr Big.
502
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:05,410
- I have no idea what that even means.\N- At least I tell the truth, you bitch.
503
00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:07,160
- What?\N- Shut up!
504
00:36:07,790 --> 00:36:08,620
Right...
505
00:36:10,210 --> 00:36:11,710
to the left.
506
00:36:12,420 --> 00:36:15,920
We can dump the body\Nafter {\i1}Sex and the City, {\i0}but now, chill.
507
00:36:19,090 --> 00:36:23,910
- Oh, my God! Oh, God! Oh, God!\N- Sandy, this is not what it looks like.
508
00:36:24,110 --> 00:36:26,510
- It's not?\N- No, it's not.
509
00:36:27,100 --> 00:36:28,890
Okay.
510
00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:31,460
You're right, it's not.
511
00:36:31,660 --> 00:36:33,900
- Sandy...\N- You know what? Just...
512
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:41,140
Let's just 86 the request on the flour,
513
00:36:41,340 --> 00:36:48,200
because I just remembered\Nthat I have some in my pool.
514
00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:53,440
And I would just like to add here,
515
00:36:53,640 --> 00:36:58,400
in no way do I believe\Nthat you are going to hell,
516
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:02,660
at least not just for being gay.
517
00:37:02,860 --> 00:37:08,870
So I'm just gonna find my way to the door\Nand then I'm gonna be out of here!
518
00:37:09,070 --> 00:37:10,290
Sandy, wait!
519
00:37:10,490 --> 00:37:12,670
You're gay,\Nyou're supposed to be nice people!
520
00:37:12,870 --> 00:37:13,640
Please.
521
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:15,420
Sandy.
522
00:37:15,620 --> 00:37:16,760
You locked me in!
523
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:18,220
No. No, no. Sandy.
524
00:37:18,420 --> 00:37:20,010
You're trying to kill me!
525
00:37:20,210 --> 00:37:23,320
- We're not. It's unlocked, actually.\N- Pull, don't push, hon.
526
00:37:25,110 --> 00:37:26,990
Sandy! Sandy!
527
00:37:28,530 --> 00:37:29,950
Sandy! Sandy!
528
00:37:30,660 --> 00:37:32,400
- Sandy!\N- Sandykins!
529
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:33,790
Sandy?
530
00:37:34,670 --> 00:37:35,710
Sandy?
531
00:37:38,750 --> 00:37:40,070
We're not gonna hurt you, babe!
532
00:37:40,270 --> 00:37:42,590
Is she astral-projecting?\NWhere the fuck did she go?
533
00:37:49,180 --> 00:37:49,960
Sandy?
534
00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:51,290
Sandy.
535
00:37:51,490 --> 00:37:52,430
Sandy!
536
00:37:52,930 --> 00:37:53,880
Come out, babe.
537
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:54,850
Sandy!
538
00:38:01,730 --> 00:38:02,730
Sandy!
539
00:38:06,950 --> 00:38:07,950
Gary?
540
00:38:08,910 --> 00:38:12,690
I have just taken a fistful of drugs,
541
00:38:12,890 --> 00:38:16,520
and I will be sedated or dead\Nwithin minutes,
542
00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:21,650
feeling none of the sick,\Ntwisted, homosexual depravity
543
00:38:21,850 --> 00:38:25,970
you subject my Christ-like body to!
544
00:38:27,130 --> 00:38:27,970
Pills!
545
00:38:30,100 --> 00:38:31,410
- Sandy!\N- Sandy!
546
00:38:31,610 --> 00:38:32,390
Sandy!
547
00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:43,440
Sandy?
548
00:38:44,650 --> 00:38:45,780
Sandy?
549
00:38:46,490 --> 00:38:49,600
- What in the {\i1}Hoarders {\i0}hell?\N- Welcome to my old life.
550
00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:53,190
Sandy, listen. I'm really concerned\Nabout the amount of pills you've taken.
551
00:38:53,380 --> 00:38:57,250
And if you have more,\NI would absolutely buy them off of you.
552
00:38:59,920 --> 00:39:00,750
Where is she?
553
00:39:02,590 --> 00:39:04,450
- She's not here.\N- Of course she's not here.
554
00:39:04,650 --> 00:39:06,820
Why do you even have a dog cage?
555
00:39:07,020 --> 00:39:08,160
It was Duke's.
556
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:10,950
Right, the dog you Nicole Kidman'd\Ninto the lake.
557
00:39:11,150 --> 00:39:13,000
Virginia Woolf'd, and yes.
558
00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:15,620
- And you still keep his cage?\N- To remember him by!
559
00:39:15,820 --> 00:39:17,920
You need to learn to let things go.\NIt's not healthy.
560
00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,590
You mean, you're in a position\Nto tell me what's healthy?
561
00:39:20,790 --> 00:39:23,150
You hear that? The closet. The closet!
562
00:39:34,870 --> 00:39:35,870
Sandy?
563
00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:40,460
- It's jammed.\N- Move, move, move.
564
00:39:44,590 --> 00:39:47,910
- All right, it's obviously locked.\N- You can't lock a closet from the inside.
565
00:39:48,110 --> 00:39:51,220
- Says the expert on being in the closet.\N- You know what, shut up.
566
00:39:52,180 --> 00:39:53,330
I can let go of things.
567
00:39:53,530 --> 00:39:56,120
I prefer to have the physical evidence\Nthat I was actually here.
568
00:39:56,320 --> 00:39:59,130
Okay, I don't really know if a dog crate\Nis the best example of that.
569
00:39:59,330 --> 00:40:01,710
- Is everything a joke to you?\N- That wasn't a joke.
570
00:40:01,910 --> 00:40:04,730
You ever stop\Nto consider anybody else's feelings ever?
571
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:08,010
You wanna talk about\Nother people's feelings?
572
00:40:08,210 --> 00:40:11,950
Let's talk about how you don't have\Nthe balls to call your own family back.
573
00:40:13,620 --> 00:40:14,950
How do you know that?
574
00:40:16,990 --> 00:40:17,770
Yeah.
575
00:40:17,970 --> 00:40:20,440
She said Patty wants to talk to you,\Nbut you just refuse.
576
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:23,000
- You wouldn't understand.\N- So you're gay.
577
00:40:23,630 --> 00:40:26,030
So they reacted badly. Call them back.
578
00:40:26,230 --> 00:40:31,260
Okay, let me take some advice from a kid\Nwho gives happy endings for a living.
579
00:40:32,340 --> 00:40:35,330
The operative word there is "happy,"\Nyou sad fuck.
580
00:40:35,530 --> 00:40:37,220
- Oh, I'm sad?\N- Yeah.
581
00:40:37,810 --> 00:40:41,770
Why don't you examine your own\Nuneducated existence, you Jezebel!
582
00:40:44,020 --> 00:40:45,440
Jezebel?
583
00:40:46,020 --> 00:40:49,340
When I find out who Jezebel is,\NI assume I'm gonna be so mad at you!
584
00:40:49,540 --> 00:40:50,470
Don't follow me!
585
00:40:50,670 --> 00:40:51,890
Hey, you know what?
586
00:40:52,090 --> 00:40:55,270
Your life isn't the only one that changed\Nwhen you decided to come out.
587
00:40:55,470 --> 00:40:57,890
I had to be someone I hated for them!
588
00:40:58,090 --> 00:41:00,950
- And that's not their fault.\N- And you think I don't know that?
589
00:41:01,790 --> 00:41:04,290
Gary. Gary, where are you going?
590
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:06,710
Fuck!
591
00:41:33,490 --> 00:41:35,950
I always did what I was supposed to do.
592
00:41:38,330 --> 00:41:39,700
I went to church.
593
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:45,440
I married young.
594
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,860
I had kids\Nwhen I was younger than you are!
595
00:41:48,060 --> 00:41:50,530
Imagine if I had a kid right now.\NThat'd be so toxic.
596
00:41:50,730 --> 00:41:52,760
I followed all the rules!
597
00:41:54,970 --> 00:41:57,970
I didn't smoke. I drank in moderation.
598
00:41:59,930 --> 00:42:01,870
I cut fat out of my diet in the '90s
599
00:42:02,070 --> 00:42:04,890
and put it back in 2013\Nwhen avocados got big!
600
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:08,100
- Okay.\N- My whole life, I've been good!
601
00:42:09,940 --> 00:42:11,520
A good husband.
602
00:42:13,860 --> 00:42:15,030
A good father.
603
00:42:15,820 --> 00:42:18,160
Okay. That was a little bit hard.
604
00:42:18,870 --> 00:42:20,160
A good man!
605
00:42:22,240 --> 00:42:25,120
I didn't enjoy any of it!
606
00:42:27,580 --> 00:42:29,610
Gary, seriously,\Nyou just hit my fucking head.
607
00:42:29,810 --> 00:42:30,840
And you know what?
608
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,740
There is a part of me,
609
00:42:33,940 --> 00:42:37,490
some terrible part of me,\Nthat blames them. But it's my fault!
610
00:42:37,690 --> 00:42:40,550
It's all my fault! It's my fault!
611
00:42:43,220 --> 00:42:44,060
Oh, my God.
612
00:42:44,640 --> 00:42:45,790
It's my fault.
613
00:42:45,990 --> 00:42:48,650
Gary? Gary, Gary!
614
00:42:49,270 --> 00:42:52,930
- Gary. Hey, just breathe. Come on.\N- I can't breathe.
615
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:55,150
Come on. Come on.
616
00:42:55,990 --> 00:42:59,010
- You're okay. I know.\N- I can't breathe. I can't breathe.
617
00:42:59,210 --> 00:43:01,070
- Breathe. Breathe.\N- I can't breathe.
618
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,950
I can't breathe. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
619
00:43:07,540 --> 00:43:10,540
I'm sorry for calling you Jezebel.
620
00:43:11,040 --> 00:43:13,280
I don't even know who Jezebel is.
621
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:17,840
But if she's anything like me, we stan.\NIs she hot?
622
00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:28,340
You know, I actually envy you, Gary.
623
00:43:28,530 --> 00:43:31,480
- Oh, please.\N- No, seriously, I do.
624
00:43:32,150 --> 00:43:35,680
You spent your whole life\Nlying to everyone about everything,
625
00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:37,860
but you still have a lot to show for it.
626
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:42,450
You do. You're having a panic attack\Non your own damn tennis court!
627
00:43:52,170 --> 00:43:55,380
My dad didn't even acknowledge\Nwhen I told him I was gay.
628
00:43:58,050 --> 00:44:00,090
He just said, "Not to me, you're not."
629
00:44:01,590 --> 00:44:05,140
And then he went back to watching TV\Nlike it never happened.
630
00:44:08,350 --> 00:44:13,650
Next day, I left a note on my bed,\Ndrove away, never to return.
631
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:17,860
What did the note say?
632
00:44:20,740 --> 00:44:22,220
"Fuck you, you bigoted fat fuck.
633
00:44:22,420 --> 00:44:24,740
Your son's a sissy whore faggot\Nwho loves it in the ass."
634
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:29,700
Or something to that effect.\NI can't really remember, but...
635
00:44:31,460 --> 00:44:33,170
He actually meant well, I think.
636
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:37,630
In his own weird, demented way, he...
637
00:44:40,300 --> 00:44:42,930
He thought that if I was gay,\Nhe had to stop loving me.
638
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:48,310
So he chose to ignore it\Nbecause he wanted to keep loving his son.
639
00:44:49,930 --> 00:44:52,640
But loving someone with conditions\Nisn't love, it's...
640
00:44:55,020 --> 00:44:55,860
prison.
641
00:45:01,610 --> 00:45:03,240
You're a good man, Cam.
642
00:45:08,370 --> 00:45:12,690
Yeah, based on tonight, I don't think\Neither one of us is technically that good,
643
00:45:12,890 --> 00:45:14,370
but I appreciate that.
644
00:45:19,340 --> 00:45:23,160
Well, at least it's some relief\Nknowing there are people out there
645
00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:25,300
being worse than us in the world.
646
00:45:27,260 --> 00:45:28,100
Yeah.
647
00:45:29,470 --> 00:45:30,310
Yeah.
648
00:45:32,850 --> 00:45:34,190
What did you just say?
649
00:45:36,190 --> 00:45:38,110
There are worse people in the world?
650
00:45:40,190 --> 00:45:43,100
Gary. Gary, you're a fucking genius.
651
00:45:43,290 --> 00:45:45,060
- I am?\N- Yes! Yes!
652
00:45:45,250 --> 00:45:48,560
We just have\Nto find somebody worse than us.
653
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:53,440
Someone that is so insane and deranged,\Nthey'll get us out of this whole mess.
654
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:56,250
- All we have to do is--\N- Get back on Plungr.
655
00:45:57,000 --> 00:45:59,590
The beginning and the end\Nof all of life's problems.
656
00:46:01,630 --> 00:46:03,950
You have got to work\Non your internalised homophobia.
657
00:46:04,150 --> 00:46:05,590
It is seriously shocking.
658
00:46:07,180 --> 00:46:08,800
Let's go, Gary!
659
00:46:11,760 --> 00:46:13,140
"Let's go, Gary."
660
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:23,030
- What are you doing?\N- The dark web, Gary.
661
00:46:24,690 --> 00:46:28,220
- On Looking2Succ's phone?\N- You want it traced back to yours?
662
00:46:28,420 --> 00:46:29,370
Hold this.
663
00:46:30,490 --> 00:46:32,690
- Do the facial recognition!\N- Jesus Christ.
664
00:46:32,890 --> 00:46:33,660
Do it!
665
00:46:39,750 --> 00:46:41,320
- What happens now?\N- I'm doing it, Gary.
666
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,210
- Doing what?\N- The dark web.
667
00:46:48,010 --> 00:46:49,910
- Is it hard to do?\N- Honey!
668
00:46:50,110 --> 00:46:52,060
Why don't you make us\Nsome coffee or something?
669
00:46:55,270 --> 00:46:57,630
Okay. "Church organist,\Ncan play with or without pipes."
670
00:46:57,830 --> 00:47:00,760
Why would a church organist advertise\Non the dark web?
671
00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:03,470
- It's code.\N- For what? Sex stuff?
672
00:47:03,670 --> 00:47:05,240
Organ harvesting, duh.
673
00:47:07,530 --> 00:47:10,110
"Circus, Circus, Tigers,\Nand Bears, Oh, Die."
674
00:47:10,910 --> 00:47:12,020
I don't think I wanna know.
675
00:47:12,220 --> 00:47:14,330
They're either into bestiality\Nor an arms dealer.
676
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:17,400
Those are two very different things.
677
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:19,040
One would think.
678
00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:23,040
Okay, this one says, "Shit on my chest."
679
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:27,970
Shit. Okay, so shit's brown.\NBrown is also the colour of dirt.
680
00:47:29,130 --> 00:47:33,710
Chest, like burying a chest?\NLike treasure? Like pirates?
681
00:47:33,900 --> 00:47:36,770
They literally just want someone\Nto shit on their chest, Gary.
682
00:47:38,270 --> 00:47:41,980
Right? It's like, "Go back to Plungr\Nwhere you belong, scat queen."
683
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,510
Gary. Gary, this is our guy.
684
00:47:45,710 --> 00:47:48,890
"Fleshpuppet.\NCollecting lifeless lamb chops for play,
685
00:47:49,090 --> 00:47:52,100
with no strings to hold me down,\Nor attached."
686
00:47:52,300 --> 00:47:55,310
- "Fleshpuppet"?\N- Geppetto would never.
687
00:47:55,510 --> 00:47:58,900
"Collecting lifeless lamb chops for play"?
688
00:47:59,100 --> 00:48:01,320
- I don't like the sound of that.\N- I do.
689
00:48:01,520 --> 00:48:03,900
Let him take this literal 6'2" lamb chop\Noff our hands.
690
00:48:04,100 --> 00:48:06,320
What does he want with dead bodies?
691
00:48:06,520 --> 00:48:08,530
Fuck them, eat them,\Nfuck them and eat them,
692
00:48:08,730 --> 00:48:09,910
fuck them while eating them,
693
00:48:10,110 --> 00:48:12,080
make a skin suit out of them,\Nsell them for parts,
694
00:48:12,280 --> 00:48:13,330
dress them up like his mom.
695
00:48:13,530 --> 00:48:16,120
The list goes on and on.\NHaven't you ever seen a movie before?
696
00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:19,250
Anyway, that's none of our business, okay?\NWe are just the supplier.
697
00:48:19,450 --> 00:48:22,000
Do not go getting\Na moral compass on me again.
698
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:24,590
We should probably clean ourselves up\Nbefore he comes over.
699
00:48:24,790 --> 00:48:26,420
Does that really matter at this point?
700
00:48:26,620 --> 00:48:28,470
Gary, just because you're dying\Ndoes not mean
701
00:48:28,670 --> 00:48:30,140
you shouldn't always look your best.
702
00:48:30,340 --> 00:48:33,140
I was not talking about my appearance.\NI was talking about the blood.
703
00:48:33,340 --> 00:48:36,770
Oh, my God, Gary, you're right.\NWe need to give you a makeover!
704
00:48:36,970 --> 00:48:38,910
- Cameron, no.\N- Yes!
705
00:49:33,760 --> 00:49:36,550
Ta-da!
706
00:49:38,390 --> 00:49:39,510
Okay.
707
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:42,830
I look like me, but in blue.
708
00:49:43,030 --> 00:49:43,980
Yeah.
709
00:49:44,980 --> 00:49:48,940
You are a total zaddy, Gary.
710
00:49:50,780 --> 00:49:54,220
Okay. I am a cool...
711
00:49:54,420 --> 00:49:56,950
hot zaddy.
712
00:49:58,160 --> 00:50:01,020
- Can you please not smoke inside?\N- It's not smoke, it's vaping.
713
00:50:01,220 --> 00:50:02,150
Just don't do it inside.
714
00:50:02,340 --> 00:50:04,520
We killed a man two hours ago,\Nbut I can't vape inside?
715
00:50:04,720 --> 00:50:06,150
Accidentally killed a man.
716
00:50:06,350 --> 00:50:08,570
Isn't weed supposed to be good for you,\Nwith the cancer?
717
00:50:08,770 --> 00:50:11,710
- I prefer edibles.\N- No, too many carbs.
718
00:50:12,590 --> 00:50:13,630
Screw it.
719
00:50:15,170 --> 00:50:17,660
- How do I work it?\N- You just press the button.
720
00:50:17,860 --> 00:50:19,620
- Hold it? Press it?\N- And inhale.
721
00:50:19,820 --> 00:50:20,760
And then what?
722
00:50:22,010 --> 00:50:23,350
- Fleshpuppet.\N- Fleshpuppet.
723
00:50:27,940 --> 00:50:30,310
- Oh, my God.\N- Buck.
724
00:50:33,860 --> 00:50:35,450
I'm Gary.
725
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:38,140
All right, Gary.\NYou gonna let me in or what?
726
00:50:38,340 --> 00:50:39,370
Oh, yeah.
727
00:50:41,410 --> 00:50:42,240
Cool.
728
00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:49,420
Oh, my God.
729
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:53,380
Who are you?
730
00:50:54,710 --> 00:50:57,470
Cameron, this is Buck.
731
00:50:58,380 --> 00:50:59,640
Fleshpuppet?
732
00:51:01,850 --> 00:51:02,680
Buck.
733
00:51:05,060 --> 00:51:08,290
- You're, like, hot.\N- Yeah, I know. Life ain't fair.
734
00:51:08,490 --> 00:51:10,100
So where's the body?
735
00:51:10,690 --> 00:51:12,880
Quick question before we begin.
736
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:14,340
- Are you a cop?\N- A cop?
737
00:51:14,540 --> 00:51:17,470
- Yes.\N- What? No! Wait, are you?
738
00:51:17,670 --> 00:51:18,890
No.
739
00:51:19,090 --> 00:51:21,680
Are you? You kind of look like a cop.
740
00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:25,190
- Oh, thank you.\N- That's not a compliment.
741
00:51:25,390 --> 00:51:28,580
No, I'm not a cop at all.\NOf course not, I'm not a cop.
742
00:51:29,250 --> 00:51:32,570
Good. 'Cause the dark web's\Nbuilt on trust.
743
00:51:32,770 --> 00:51:34,250
Stitch that into a pillow.
744
00:51:36,460 --> 00:51:41,750
Where are my manners, Buck?\NCan I offer you something to drink?
745
00:51:41,940 --> 00:51:42,750
Y'all got Red Bull?
746
00:51:42,950 --> 00:51:45,390
- Oh, my God. I wish.\N- That's the one thing I don't have.
747
00:51:46,060 --> 00:51:47,180
Fuck!
748
00:51:47,770 --> 00:51:50,300
I don't know exactly\Nhow to get this thing started,
749
00:51:50,490 --> 00:51:53,880
so why don't I just tell you a little bit\Nabout how we got into this pickle?
750
00:51:54,080 --> 00:51:56,930
Cameron and I invited over\Nthis gentleman--
751
00:51:57,130 --> 00:51:58,280
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
752
00:51:58,860 --> 00:52:01,430
- The body's a man?\N- Yes.
753
00:52:01,630 --> 00:52:02,570
Is that okay?
754
00:52:03,910 --> 00:52:06,980
- Body's a body.\N- Oh, my God. Progressive. You're hot.
755
00:52:07,180 --> 00:52:10,570
Okay. So we invited over\Nthis lovely gentleman.
756
00:52:10,760 --> 00:52:13,610
Well, we thought he was lovely.\NIt turns out that he was really angry--
757
00:52:13,810 --> 00:52:16,710
This closeted fuck came over\Nand fell out the window, all right?
758
00:52:17,300 --> 00:52:19,490
- That sounds ambiguous.\N- No, no.
759
00:52:19,690 --> 00:52:23,120
We assure you that everything\Nthat happened was an accident.
760
00:52:23,320 --> 00:52:25,540
- Where did you kill him?\N- Right outside.
761
00:52:25,740 --> 00:52:27,460
- You moved the body?\N- It's in the closet.
762
00:52:27,660 --> 00:52:30,710
That makes your cleanup much trickier.\NYou guys ever seen {\i1}Gone Girl?{\i0}
763
00:52:30,910 --> 00:52:32,800
Just the part with Ben Affleck's dick.
764
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:34,210
- Gary.\N- What?
765
00:52:34,410 --> 00:52:37,900
So you guys have never dealt\Nwith a crime scene cleanup before.
766
00:52:39,110 --> 00:52:40,350
- No.\N- No. No.
767
00:52:40,540 --> 00:52:41,350
Well...
768
00:52:41,550 --> 00:52:43,360
Lucky for you guys, I come prepared.
769
00:52:44,070 --> 00:52:46,020
All right. A little bit about me.
770
00:52:46,220 --> 00:52:49,020
I'm a Capricorn with Cancer rising.
771
00:52:49,220 --> 00:52:51,060
I love long-distance running,
772
00:52:51,260 --> 00:52:53,690
old science textbooks,\Nand fucking dead bodies.
773
00:52:53,890 --> 00:52:56,490
Oh, my God. I am such a sucker\Nfor Capricorns, Gary.
774
00:52:56,690 --> 00:52:59,200
Because I'm a Christian,\NI'll walk you through the deep clean,
775
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:01,570
but you're gonna have to do\Nthe legwork yourself.
776
00:53:01,770 --> 00:53:05,550
All I need in return is the body,\Nno questions asked.
777
00:53:06,350 --> 00:53:11,330
I'm sorry, just the one question\Nabout "fucking dead bodies"?
778
00:53:11,530 --> 00:53:12,590
No questions asked.
779
00:53:12,790 --> 00:53:14,170
Right, but just the one question
780
00:53:14,370 --> 00:53:15,670
- before no questions.\N- No, no, no.
781
00:53:15,870 --> 00:53:19,970
That's all, that's all, that's all.\NThank you so much, Mr Fleshpuppet.
782
00:53:20,170 --> 00:53:21,800
- I'm having second thoughts.\N- Too late.
783
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:23,260
What do you care what he does to the body?
784
00:53:23,460 --> 00:53:25,850
- I care.\N- Wanna keep it? Put it in the freezer?
785
00:53:26,050 --> 00:53:27,640
- I don't wanna keep it.\N- Ut-shay up-yay!
786
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:29,700
Get me out of here!
787
00:53:33,210 --> 00:53:35,900
Sounds like you got more than one problem\Non your hands, boys.
788
00:53:36,100 --> 00:53:39,700
- No, just {\i1}Sex and the City.{\i0}\N- No, that's {\i1}Real Housewives of...{\i0}
789
00:53:39,900 --> 00:53:40,990
{\i1}- Reno.{\i0}\N{\i1}- Reno.{\i0}
790
00:53:41,190 --> 00:53:42,420
Marathon.
791
00:53:43,380 --> 00:53:46,300
- We're Bravoheads.\N- Bravo.
792
00:53:48,260 --> 00:53:50,790
All right. Y'all got oxygen-based bleach?
793
00:53:50,990 --> 00:53:52,060
I'll go check.
794
00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:00,270
Banging fucking house, Gary.
795
00:54:01,820 --> 00:54:04,240
- Thank you.\N- What's this?
796
00:54:07,530 --> 00:54:09,950
Put that down. Please.
797
00:54:11,540 --> 00:54:13,200
It's just very delicate.
798
00:54:21,380 --> 00:54:22,380
Thank you.
799
00:54:29,640 --> 00:54:32,420
You guys are making\Nvery quick work of this.
800
00:54:32,610 --> 00:54:34,980
I'm impressed.\NI might have to hire you guys.
801
00:54:36,850 --> 00:54:40,090
Yeah. Thank you for all of your help.
802
00:54:40,290 --> 00:54:43,610
Yeah. I mean, crime-scene cleaning\Ncan be so exhausting.
803
00:54:45,650 --> 00:54:47,600
You guys mind if I take a smoke break?
804
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:49,820
- I think we should keep working through--\N- Gary.
805
00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:52,890
Fine. Patio's just--
806
00:54:53,090 --> 00:54:55,360
We already vaped inside.\NWho cares if he smokes?
807
00:54:55,550 --> 00:54:57,160
Yeah, you're the guest.
808
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:11,180
Oh, did you want some?
809
00:55:12,220 --> 00:55:14,020
I thought you would never ask.
810
00:55:14,890 --> 00:55:17,920
Oh, sorry.\NGary, did you wanna hit it first?
811
00:55:18,120 --> 00:55:20,520
Oh, yes, for the host with the most.
812
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:23,110
- Go on.\N- No, I'm fine.
813
00:55:23,690 --> 00:55:24,840
Suit yourself, narc.
814
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:27,610
Would you just excuse us\Nfor one second, please?
815
00:55:28,150 --> 00:55:29,570
You're trying to embarrass me?
816
00:55:35,700 --> 00:55:38,690
- Get in here.\N- Crack is where I draw the line.
817
00:55:38,890 --> 00:55:39,820
Gary--
818
00:55:40,020 --> 00:55:43,360
- Oh, my God, this powder room.\N- Well...
819
00:55:43,560 --> 00:55:46,410
This was Patty's design.\NI would take a more minimalist approach.
820
00:55:46,610 --> 00:55:49,470
Wow, you gave her one room to decorate.\NYou are an oppressor.
821
00:55:54,640 --> 00:55:57,250
Okay, speaking of,\Ncan you please be cool out there?
822
00:55:57,450 --> 00:55:59,000
There is nothing cool about crack!
823
00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:01,800
Do you know how hard it is\Nto get crack offered to you guilt-free?
824
00:56:02,000 --> 00:56:03,090
- "Guilt-free"?\N- Yeah.
825
00:56:03,290 --> 00:56:05,720
This isn't a fucking\Ncauliflower-crust pizza, Cameron.
826
00:56:05,920 --> 00:56:06,880
It's a Class A narcotic!
827
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:10,570
Gary, do you know how much crack\NI'd be smoking if I was dying right now?
828
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:12,930
- A lot.\N- Yes, that is correct. A lot.
829
00:56:13,130 --> 00:56:14,600
A lot of fucking crack!
830
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:16,980
How does that song go?\N"Smoke crack like you're dying."
831
00:56:17,180 --> 00:56:19,440
I've never heard it,\Nbut I'm sure that's not how it goes.
832
00:56:19,640 --> 00:56:20,520
Whatever. It's a remix.
833
00:56:20,720 --> 00:56:23,400
We are gonna go out there\Nand smoke a shit-ton of crack
834
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:25,400
with the guy who's gonna get\Nthis dead body off our hands.
835
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,110
- And you'll be cool about it!\N- Cameron.
836
00:56:27,310 --> 00:56:28,090
- No!\N- Yes!
837
00:56:33,050 --> 00:56:35,710
Nicely done, papa.
838
00:56:35,900 --> 00:56:37,670
- Not too much, Cam.\N- Get fucked.
839
00:56:37,870 --> 00:56:40,540
We just killed a man and there's\Na sweet church lady in the closet.
840
00:56:40,740 --> 00:56:43,300
I knew there was a lady upstairs.\NI love you guys.
841
00:56:43,500 --> 00:56:45,090
I'm gonna smoke as much crack as I want,
842
00:56:45,290 --> 00:56:47,880
because it's been a lot of firsts\Nfor me too tonight, Gary.
843
00:56:48,080 --> 00:56:49,280
Where are you going?
844
00:56:57,410 --> 00:56:58,540
Holy shit.
845
00:57:00,330 --> 00:57:01,660
Fuck! I feel...
846
00:57:03,580 --> 00:57:04,750
I feel like...
847
00:57:06,130 --> 00:57:08,150
I remember my first light.
848
00:57:08,350 --> 00:57:12,420
It's like I took a flight,\Na pleasure in your mind.
849
00:57:13,050 --> 00:57:14,740
It feels just right.
850
00:57:14,940 --> 00:57:17,010
Whoa! Did that just rhyme?
851
00:57:18,470 --> 00:57:21,270
- Did you hear that?\N- No, I didn't hear anything.
852
00:57:21,980 --> 00:57:25,130
It's your subconscious, Gary.\NGuilt's creeping in.
853
00:57:25,330 --> 00:57:27,310
Just ignore it. That's what I do.
854
00:57:32,280 --> 00:57:33,890
Did you hear that?
855
00:57:34,090 --> 00:57:36,990
That sound in your head,\Nit's like a popping sound.
856
00:57:43,370 --> 00:57:46,730
Totally normal.\NIt's your mind expanding, my friends.
857
00:57:46,930 --> 00:57:50,170
Just ignore the demons\Nand focus on the feeling.
858
00:57:51,260 --> 00:57:52,260
The feeling.
859
00:57:53,300 --> 00:57:54,590
I feel...
860
00:58:01,720 --> 00:58:02,770
{\i1}I feel...{\i0}
861
00:58:05,520 --> 00:58:06,670
Good.
862
00:58:06,870 --> 00:58:12,590
{\i1}Where have{\i0}\N{\i1}Where have you been all my life and{\i0}
863
00:58:12,790 --> 00:58:15,390
{\i1}Boy don't stop taking me{\i0}\N{\i1}High{\i0}
864
00:58:15,590 --> 00:58:19,390
{\i1}Midnight in Brooklyn{\i0}\N{\i1}You leaned in first{\i0}
865
00:58:19,590 --> 00:58:23,190
{\i1}I wasn't looking{\i0}\N{\i1}But there you were{\i0}
866
00:58:23,390 --> 00:58:26,900
{\i1}My fallen angel{\i0}\N{\i1}Calling my name, calling my name{\i0}
867
00:58:27,100 --> 00:58:31,110
{\i1}My fallen angel{\i0}\N{\i1}Calling my name, calling my name{\i0}
868
00:58:31,310 --> 00:58:34,820
{\i1}Lost in a dark room{\i0}\N{\i1}Walking on air{\i0}
869
00:58:35,020 --> 00:58:38,540
{\i1}Don't have to see you{\i0}\N{\i1}To know you're there{\i0}
870
00:58:38,740 --> 00:58:42,580
{\i1}- Die for the way you're{\i0}\N{\i1}- Dancing on me, dancing on me{\i0}
871
00:58:42,780 --> 00:58:46,230
{\i1}- Die for the way you're{\i0}\N{\i1}- Dancing on me, dancing on me{\i0}
872
00:58:47,350 --> 00:58:50,420
{\i1}The way you make me feel{\i0}\N{\i1}I swear you take me higher{\i0}
873
00:58:50,620 --> 00:58:54,720
{\i1}Yes, I'm your every desire{\i0}\N{\i1}Take me home, but take me higher{\i0}
874
00:58:54,920 --> 00:58:58,100
{\i1}The way you make me feel{\i0}\N{\i1}I swear you take me higher{\i0}
875
00:58:58,300 --> 00:59:02,480
{\i1}Yes, I'm your every desire{\i0}\N{\i1}When you take me higher{\i0}
876
00:59:02,680 --> 00:59:07,980
{\i1}Where have{\i0}\N{\i1}Where have you been all my life and{\i0}
877
00:59:08,180 --> 00:59:11,030
{\i1}Boy don't stop taking me{\i0}\N{\i1}High{\i0}
878
00:59:11,230 --> 00:59:14,780
{\i1}Higher than I've ever been{\i0}\N{\i1}High{\i0}
879
00:59:14,980 --> 00:59:17,090
{\i1}Higher than the heavens is{\i0}
880
00:59:18,130 --> 00:59:23,710
{\i1}No lie{\i0}\N{\i1}No lie, your hands keep my hands tied{\i0}
881
00:59:23,910 --> 00:59:26,170
{\i1}Boy don't stop taking me{\i0}\N{\i1}High{\i0}
882
00:59:26,370 --> 00:59:30,000
{\i1}Higher than I've ever been{\i0}\N{\i1}High{\i0}
883
00:59:30,200 --> 00:59:33,010
{\i1}Higher than the heavens is{\i0}
884
00:59:33,210 --> 00:59:36,260
{\i1}Jump into diamonds{\i0}\N{\i1}A thousand eyes{\i0}
885
00:59:36,460 --> 00:59:40,930
{\i1}Watching the silence{\i0}\N{\i1}As we get higher{\i0}
886
00:59:41,130 --> 00:59:42,660
Is this what it's like?
887
00:59:44,620 --> 00:59:45,620
What's like?
888
00:59:52,420 --> 00:59:55,590
Yeah, this is what it's like.
889
00:59:59,760 --> 01:00:00,760
Come on.
890
01:01:35,600 --> 01:01:38,130
Crack is so bad for you.
891
01:01:38,330 --> 01:01:40,030
Really, really bad.
892
01:01:40,900 --> 01:01:44,450
Very, very, very bad.
893
01:01:45,700 --> 01:01:46,700
For sure.
894
01:01:50,410 --> 01:01:52,910
You guys doing anything for the Rapture?
895
01:01:54,750 --> 01:01:56,920
- What?\N- The Rapture.
896
01:01:57,580 --> 01:02:00,130
Doomsday. End times.
897
01:02:01,550 --> 01:02:04,620
I just finished building my bomb shelter.
898
01:02:04,820 --> 01:02:06,760
I got a full kit and everything.
899
01:02:07,390 --> 01:02:09,220
I put all my regalia in there.
900
01:02:10,390 --> 01:02:12,310
You guys are welcome to join me.
901
01:02:13,390 --> 01:02:14,770
Thanks, Fleshpuppet.
902
01:02:15,390 --> 01:02:16,900
What about you, narc?
903
01:02:20,230 --> 01:02:22,650
I don't think I'll be seeing\Nthe end of the world.
904
01:02:23,860 --> 01:02:25,780
- Don't be such a pessimist.\N- Hey.
905
01:02:26,320 --> 01:02:27,410
He's dying.
906
01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:32,490
- That's hot.\N- Keep it in your pants.
907
01:02:33,830 --> 01:02:34,900
How much longer you got?
908
01:02:35,100 --> 01:02:37,120
Okay, that's so rude.\NYou don't ask people that.
909
01:02:40,540 --> 01:02:42,170
Wait, how much longer do you got?
910
01:02:43,590 --> 01:02:44,590
A month.
911
01:02:46,050 --> 01:02:48,430
- A month?\N- Give or take.
912
01:02:54,640 --> 01:02:55,640
I'm gonna...
913
01:02:56,350 --> 01:02:57,630
I'm gonna let you guys
914
01:02:57,830 --> 01:03:00,880
{\i1}Terms of Endearment{\i0} it up together\Nfor a little bit.
915
01:03:01,080 --> 01:03:04,440
Gary, I'm gonna go jack off\Nin one of your many bathrooms.
916
01:03:07,400 --> 01:03:09,280
That's okay. I think...
917
01:03:11,030 --> 01:03:12,910
we should all go inside now.
918
01:03:29,050 --> 01:03:30,680
Gary, I had no idea.
919
01:03:32,930 --> 01:03:34,430
I didn't tell you, so...
920
01:03:35,060 --> 01:03:36,520
I wish you would have.
921
01:03:38,440 --> 01:03:39,440
Cameron.
922
01:03:44,150 --> 01:03:45,610
Where's my egg?
923
01:03:50,070 --> 01:03:53,780
Well, gentlemen, that was fun.
924
01:03:54,370 --> 01:03:56,770
But I should probably collect my corpse
925
01:03:56,970 --> 01:03:59,230
and skedaddle\Nbefore the rest of the world wakes up.
926
01:03:59,430 --> 01:04:02,780
You know, can't be seen\Ndragging a dead body around
927
01:04:02,980 --> 01:04:04,590
in broad daylight, now, can we?
928
01:04:07,460 --> 01:04:08,880
Gary. Gary!
929
01:04:09,880 --> 01:04:12,540
- Give me my egg.\N- What the fuck are you talking about?
930
01:04:12,740 --> 01:04:15,560
- Did you put it down your pants?\N- No, that's my dick.
931
01:04:16,310 --> 01:04:17,960
We both saw your dick in the lake, Buck,
932
01:04:18,160 --> 01:04:20,420
and we can all agree\Nit doesn't look anything like that.
933
01:04:20,620 --> 01:04:23,420
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's be a little bit\Nempathetic to shrinkage, boys.
934
01:04:23,620 --> 01:04:25,550
That is my great-great-grandmother's\Nfucking egg,
935
01:04:25,750 --> 01:04:27,320
and you better fucking give it back.
936
01:04:31,030 --> 01:04:32,160
Or what?
937
01:04:35,700 --> 01:04:37,370
Boys. Boys.
938
01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:40,910
Come on, there's a better way\Nwe can work this out, right?
939
01:04:41,750 --> 01:04:42,580
Right?
940
01:04:43,580 --> 01:04:46,610
All right. You're right. You're right.
941
01:04:46,810 --> 01:04:49,660
You caught me. Let's make a deal, okay?
942
01:04:49,860 --> 01:04:53,050
I will give you\Nyour great-grandmother's egg back...
943
01:04:54,470 --> 01:04:56,680
if I can have your body after you go.
944
01:04:58,930 --> 01:05:02,090
Oh, my God. You sick fuck!
945
01:05:02,290 --> 01:05:03,550
Okay, okay. You wanna trade?
946
01:05:03,750 --> 01:05:05,630
Give him his egg back\Nand you can get your body.
947
01:05:05,830 --> 01:05:08,610
- Oh, that body's already mine.\N- Well, that egg is fucking mine!
948
01:05:09,940 --> 01:05:12,510
Worms are gonna be eating\Nyour dead gay ass in a month.
949
01:05:12,710 --> 01:05:13,970
What does it even matter?
950
01:05:14,170 --> 01:05:14,950
Jesus.
951
01:05:16,370 --> 01:05:17,200
Yeah.
952
01:05:19,370 --> 01:05:21,730
What does anything fucking matter?
953
01:05:21,930 --> 01:05:23,020
Yeah.
954
01:05:23,220 --> 01:05:25,320
What, did I say something insensitive?\NWhy is he--?
955
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:29,800
- Okay, you know what? Fuck you.\N- It's cute you care about your friend.
956
01:05:30,760 --> 01:05:32,050
All right, fine. What do you want?
957
01:05:33,380 --> 01:05:35,950
- I get the dead guy's truck.\N- Why do you want a truck?
958
01:05:36,150 --> 01:05:38,120
I Uber'd here.\NI lost everything in the divorce.
959
01:05:38,320 --> 01:05:40,890
All right. Whatever. Sure. Deal.
960
01:05:45,940 --> 01:05:47,310
My dick isn't tiny.
961
01:05:48,150 --> 01:05:49,720
No, I need you to verbalise it for me.
962
01:05:49,920 --> 01:05:51,150
- Tell me.\N- Seriously?
963
01:05:51,900 --> 01:05:54,010
- Okay, your dick is not tiny.\N- Thank you.
964
01:05:54,210 --> 01:05:58,060
Okay. All right.\NNow let's go get you your dead body.
965
01:05:58,260 --> 01:05:59,830
Finally. Jesus.
966
01:06:00,740 --> 01:06:03,980
So he has a habit of falling out,\Nso just keep that in mind.
967
01:06:04,180 --> 01:06:06,540
- This ain't my first rodeo, pal.\N- Hey.
968
01:06:07,790 --> 01:06:11,070
- I don't want Buck to have the body.\N- Gary, it's practically rush hour.
969
01:06:11,270 --> 01:06:13,470
No, we cannot give the body to this...
970
01:06:14,220 --> 01:06:16,340
twisted, dark-sided psychopath.
971
01:06:16,930 --> 01:06:20,410
Okay, I'm starting to feel judged,\Nand I'm about to get mad.
972
01:06:20,610 --> 01:06:22,880
No, no, don't get mad.\NWe're gonna give you your body.
973
01:06:23,070 --> 01:06:25,880
- He deserves a proper burial.\N- Jesus Christ, I'm not an animal.
974
01:06:26,080 --> 01:06:28,420
I'm gonna bury him\Nafter I'm done fucking him. Jesus.
975
01:06:28,620 --> 01:06:30,670
- Open the door and give me the body.\N- Don't open the door.
976
01:06:30,870 --> 01:06:32,640
Open the door. Open the door.
977
01:06:32,830 --> 01:06:35,010
- Do not open the door.\N- Shut up! Open the fucking door!
978
01:06:35,210 --> 01:06:37,110
- I'm opening the fucking door!\N- Thank you.
979
01:06:39,950 --> 01:06:41,740
- What the fuck?\N- What the fuck?
980
01:06:44,250 --> 01:06:45,370
Shit.
981
01:06:55,130 --> 01:06:58,580
What the fuck?\NHe's still alive, you fucking idiots.
982
01:06:58,780 --> 01:06:59,970
We're in the clear!
983
01:07:00,800 --> 01:07:02,330
- I'm not gay!\N- Babe, what?
984
01:07:02,530 --> 01:07:04,500
I'm not gay! I'm not gay!
985
01:07:04,700 --> 01:07:07,920
Now, sir, you've been seriously injured.
986
01:07:08,120 --> 01:07:11,420
I'm afraid that if you don't get\Nmedical attention, you could die.
987
01:07:11,620 --> 01:07:15,010
I can't have my family knowing I was here.\NDon't call the cops, please.
988
01:07:15,210 --> 01:07:17,970
Please, please, just let me go.
989
01:07:18,170 --> 01:07:21,660
I swear to God I'll never suck cock again.
990
01:07:22,280 --> 01:07:25,450
You'd rather die\Nthan have your family know you're gay?
991
01:07:26,040 --> 01:07:28,540
I'm not fucking gay!
992
01:07:36,920 --> 01:07:38,840
I'm not...
993
01:07:41,510 --> 01:07:42,510
gay.
994
01:07:49,350 --> 01:07:50,520
Got him.
995
01:07:54,320 --> 01:07:57,930
Oh, my God.\NYou fucking murdered him again!
996
01:07:58,130 --> 01:08:01,110
- Hey. It's my body.\N- He wasn't dead!
997
01:08:02,700 --> 01:08:04,030
He's dead now.
998
01:08:08,330 --> 01:08:11,540
You know, I'm a little upset, guys.
999
01:08:12,130 --> 01:08:13,750
Seeing you try to help him.
1000
01:08:15,340 --> 01:08:16,710
Thought we had a deal.
1001
01:08:17,300 --> 01:08:18,590
Put him down.
1002
01:08:24,600 --> 01:08:26,140
What are you gonna do about it?
1003
01:08:26,720 --> 01:08:27,930
Gary!
1004
01:08:33,020 --> 01:08:34,560
Gary! Gary!
1005
01:08:35,479 --> 01:08:38,740
I told you not to make me angry, narc!
1006
01:08:41,569 --> 01:08:42,910
Get off of him!
1007
01:08:49,500 --> 01:08:52,620
I can't wait to fuck the death into you.
1008
01:08:54,500 --> 01:08:57,840
That's so gross.
1009
01:09:21,359 --> 01:09:23,109
That was so hot.
1010
01:09:25,200 --> 01:09:26,029
Yeah.
1011
01:09:28,990 --> 01:09:30,000
I know.
1012
01:09:37,250 --> 01:09:39,210
Where did you get a scooter from?
1013
01:09:40,340 --> 01:09:41,590
It's my sons'.
1014
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:51,180
I know you said never\Nto save your life again, but...
1015
01:09:53,560 --> 01:09:55,100
I'll allow it this once.
1016
01:10:00,230 --> 01:10:02,440
Remember when we only had one body\Nto worry about?
1017
01:10:03,990 --> 01:10:07,020
Get in. I know a place.
1018
01:10:07,220 --> 01:10:08,450
Now you tell me.
1019
01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:34,560
Ever think about\Nwhere you wanna be buried?
1020
01:10:37,270 --> 01:10:40,150
Sorry. That's so fucked up to ask.
1021
01:10:42,030 --> 01:10:44,430
They're probably just gonna give me\Nsome kind of religious burial,
1022
01:10:44,630 --> 01:10:45,900
no matter what I want.
1023
01:10:46,950 --> 01:10:48,280
So who cares?
1024
01:10:53,240 --> 01:10:54,290
I care.
1025
01:11:00,290 --> 01:11:03,340
I don't know. Just Nicole Kidman me\Nin a lake with my dog.
1026
01:11:06,510 --> 01:11:07,800
That's a good choice.
1027
01:11:10,430 --> 01:11:11,430
Oscar-worthy.
1028
01:12:03,060 --> 01:12:05,190
- Sandy?\N- Oh, hi.
1029
01:12:05,820 --> 01:12:07,510
- Hi.\N- Hi.
1030
01:12:07,710 --> 01:12:09,990
Oh, my. Have you been gardening?
1031
01:12:14,490 --> 01:12:18,250
- A little bit.\N- Good for you!
1032
01:12:20,040 --> 01:12:22,960
Look at me,\Njust making myself right at home.
1033
01:12:23,590 --> 01:12:27,010
Listen, about last night...
1034
01:12:29,220 --> 01:12:30,680
I'm so embarrassed.
1035
01:12:31,340 --> 01:12:33,050
I don't remember a thing.
1036
01:12:33,760 --> 01:12:35,100
You don't?
1037
01:12:36,600 --> 01:12:39,980
Oh, Sandy, you did seem...
1038
01:12:40,940 --> 01:12:42,900
very inebriated.
1039
01:12:43,560 --> 01:12:44,510
Oh, Gary.
1040
01:12:44,710 --> 01:12:45,800
It was right as we--
1041
01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:48,640
I was about to watch {\i1}Sex and the City 2,{\i0}
1042
01:12:48,840 --> 01:12:50,990
and something about...
1043
01:12:52,240 --> 01:12:54,680
- Cynthia...\N- Nixon.
1044
01:12:54,880 --> 01:12:57,740
Nixon really set you off.
1045
01:12:58,790 --> 01:13:00,690
She really does bother me.
1046
01:13:00,890 --> 01:13:04,250
- But not as much as Charlotte.\N- Exactly.
1047
01:13:04,920 --> 01:13:06,650
You were threatening self-harm,
1048
01:13:06,850 --> 01:13:08,950
and then you locked yourself in the closet
1049
01:13:09,150 --> 01:13:12,090
before we-- I could help you.
1050
01:13:13,550 --> 01:13:14,870
Well, I'll tell you one thing,
1051
01:13:15,070 --> 01:13:17,960
not the first time\NI've woken up in a closet.
1052
01:13:18,160 --> 01:13:21,630
My husband, God rest his soul,
1053
01:13:21,830 --> 01:13:25,800
he practically had to tie me to the bed\Nto keep me from jumping off the balcony
1054
01:13:26,000 --> 01:13:29,090
in the middle of {\i1}Beaches,{\i0}\Nthat Bette Midler trauma.
1055
01:13:29,290 --> 01:13:30,860
I'm sure that's terrible.
1056
01:13:42,710 --> 01:13:44,960
I'm so lonely.
1057
01:13:47,920 --> 01:13:50,420
Aren't you lonely too, Gary?
1058
01:13:52,220 --> 01:13:53,050
Yeah.
1059
01:13:59,720 --> 01:14:02,930
Well, I better be getting along.
1060
01:14:03,730 --> 01:14:06,190
Gotta hit the road.
1061
01:14:08,150 --> 01:14:09,270
Stat.
1062
01:14:10,730 --> 01:14:12,030
Okay.
1063
01:14:19,490 --> 01:14:23,660
You're a good man, Gary.
1064
01:14:28,330 --> 01:14:30,500
I don't care what anyone else says.
1065
01:14:32,960 --> 01:14:33,800
Okay.
1066
01:14:36,180 --> 01:14:38,330
- Okay, bye. Bye. Bye.\N- Bye. Bye.
1067
01:14:38,530 --> 01:14:40,370
- Bye! Bye-bye!\N- Bye.
1068
01:14:40,570 --> 01:14:41,810
Bye-bye!
1069
01:14:47,350 --> 01:14:49,270
Oh, my God. Gary, you nailed that.
1070
01:14:50,190 --> 01:14:51,800
- Did I?\N- Yes, bitch.
1071
01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:55,640
The {\i1}Sex and the City 2{\i0} of it all?\NYou have really come into your own.
1072
01:14:55,840 --> 01:14:57,010
Am I officially gay now?
1073
01:14:57,210 --> 01:14:59,980
Being gay was inside of you all along,\NScarecrow.
1074
01:15:00,170 --> 01:15:03,560
This is where I make a joke about all\Nthe other gay things I want inside of me.
1075
01:15:03,760 --> 01:15:06,920
The student becomes the teacher. Namaste.
1076
01:15:18,430 --> 01:15:20,550
You wanna know something fucked up?
1077
01:15:22,430 --> 01:15:24,140
Ever since I was a little girl.
1078
01:15:30,400 --> 01:15:33,320
Last night might be the most alive\NI've ever felt.
1079
01:15:36,400 --> 01:15:37,900
That is so fucked up.
1080
01:15:41,820 --> 01:15:43,830
I'm really glad I met you.
1081
01:15:45,830 --> 01:15:48,250
Even if multiple people are dead\Nbecause of it.
1082
01:15:50,540 --> 01:15:53,040
That's the nicest thing\Nanyone's ever said to me.
1083
01:15:57,840 --> 01:15:58,970
Before I forget...
1084
01:16:04,430 --> 01:16:05,930
I put it in my pants.
1085
01:16:15,440 --> 01:16:16,730
You should keep it.
1086
01:16:21,280 --> 01:16:22,950
Something to remember me by.
1087
01:16:25,330 --> 01:16:26,740
It's yours, Gary.
1088
01:16:47,680 --> 01:16:49,670
You don't have to kiss me, Cameron.\NReally.
1089
01:16:49,870 --> 01:16:51,230
I'm not gonna kiss you.
1090
01:16:53,900 --> 01:16:55,520
You're gonna kiss me, Gary.
1091
01:17:52,370 --> 01:17:55,170
Are you sure that was your first time?\NI just fit right in there.
1092
01:17:56,920 --> 01:17:57,920
Oh, God.
1093
01:18:03,550 --> 01:18:05,930
Gary, I really think\Nyou should call your sons.
1094
01:18:07,970 --> 01:18:11,670
I don't love the timing of that statement.
1095
01:18:11,870 --> 01:18:14,270
Yeah. No, I get that, but...
1096
01:18:15,270 --> 01:18:16,270
you should.
1097
01:18:18,770 --> 01:18:20,440
I wouldn't know what to say.
1098
01:18:23,360 --> 01:18:24,900
After all this time.
1099
01:18:28,530 --> 01:18:29,580
You do, though.
1100
01:18:44,510 --> 01:18:47,760
- Thanks for the clothes.\N- Yeah, they look better on you.
1101
01:18:52,220 --> 01:18:53,220
Gary, I just...
1102
01:18:55,020 --> 01:18:56,190
I wanna say...
1103
01:18:59,560 --> 01:19:00,650
you're hot.
1104
01:19:01,900 --> 01:19:04,740
And in case I forget to tell you later...
1105
01:19:06,070 --> 01:19:07,610
I had a really good time tonight.
1106
01:19:11,330 --> 01:19:12,370
{\i1}Pretty Woman.{\i0}
1107
01:19:12,950 --> 01:19:13,790
Yeah.
1108
01:19:21,880 --> 01:19:23,090
Well, if you...
1109
01:19:24,260 --> 01:19:26,760
You wanna call me or get together again...
1110
01:19:27,930 --> 01:19:28,930
Cameron.
1111
01:19:35,770 --> 01:19:36,770
Thank you.
1112
01:19:47,320 --> 01:19:48,150
Okay.
1113
01:20:33,320 --> 01:20:34,990
"Dear friends and family...
1114
01:20:36,290 --> 01:20:38,190
After recently coming out as a gay man,
1115
01:20:38,390 --> 01:20:42,710
Gary O'Connell died on Sunday, May 31st,\Npeacefully in his home."
1116
01:20:45,130 --> 01:20:46,590
Gary.
1117
01:20:47,170 --> 01:20:50,490
"Memorial service will be held\Nat Mary Magdalene Church and Cemetery,
1118
01:20:50,690 --> 01:20:51,410
June 7th.
1119
01:20:51,610 --> 01:20:55,010
Donations in his memory\Nmay be made to the church."
1120
01:20:57,180 --> 01:20:58,600
What the fuck?
1121
01:21:11,530 --> 01:21:14,680
...wondering what if it's been me and--
1122
01:21:14,880 --> 01:21:17,080
- I don't know, I just couldn't get over--\N- Bullshit.
1123
01:21:19,250 --> 01:21:20,580
Hi, Patty.
1124
01:21:21,290 --> 01:21:23,610
I got your fucking invitation,\Nyou Hallmark hussy.
1125
01:21:23,810 --> 01:21:27,700
- That card was beautiful, tasteful--\N- And Gary would have hated it.
1126
01:21:27,900 --> 01:21:29,820
- Listen, man. You got--\N- No, no, no. That's okay.
1127
01:21:30,020 --> 01:21:31,720
I'm here 'cause I cared a lot about Gary.
1128
01:21:32,680 --> 01:21:33,510
A lot.
1129
01:21:34,300 --> 01:21:36,160
And I got to know the real him.
1130
01:21:36,360 --> 01:21:39,170
The him that none of you ever got to see.
1131
01:21:39,370 --> 01:21:40,600
And that Gary...
1132
01:21:42,270 --> 01:21:43,850
that Gary would have hated this.
1133
01:21:44,440 --> 01:21:45,520
And you know that.
1134
01:21:47,190 --> 01:21:48,480
Don't you, Patty?
1135
01:21:52,950 --> 01:21:55,780
- Are you finished?\N- I don't know. Am I finished?
1136
01:22:00,700 --> 01:22:03,910
I know you think you had a good reason\Nfor coming...
1137
01:22:04,830 --> 01:22:06,330
but let me tell you this.
1138
01:22:07,380 --> 01:22:08,920
We all made our choices.
1139
01:22:09,710 --> 01:22:12,450
My husband made his choice.
1140
01:22:12,650 --> 01:22:15,370
And was it the right one for him\Nat the time? Maybe.
1141
01:22:15,570 --> 01:22:17,790
But the truth is, if I had known,
1142
01:22:17,990 --> 01:22:20,920
maybe my choices would have\Nbeen different.
1143
01:22:21,120 --> 01:22:22,220
Because this was...
1144
01:22:22,980 --> 01:22:26,770
never about me standing in the way\Nof what Gary wanted.
1145
01:22:27,900 --> 01:22:29,320
This was about him.
1146
01:22:30,820 --> 01:22:33,760
And the both of us wasted\Nso much of our lives
1147
01:22:33,960 --> 01:22:36,640
trying to be what the other person wanted.
1148
01:22:36,840 --> 01:22:39,780
So much trying, so many years.
1149
01:22:40,490 --> 01:22:42,580
And we never did get to be who we wanted.
1150
01:22:43,250 --> 01:22:45,150
Neither one of us. Ever.
1151
01:22:45,350 --> 01:22:46,290
Until the end.
1152
01:22:47,250 --> 01:22:50,130
He wasn't sorry. He was angry.
1153
01:22:51,050 --> 01:22:53,010
And so I got angry too.
1154
01:22:53,630 --> 01:22:56,760
And we both chose to sit in that anger\Nfor a long time.
1155
01:22:57,390 --> 01:22:58,540
Too long.
1156
01:22:58,740 --> 01:23:01,160
But then we made another choice.
1157
01:23:01,360 --> 01:23:03,540
And we had the courage\Nto put all that aside.
1158
01:23:03,740 --> 01:23:07,520
And that is the man\Nthat I finally got to know.
1159
01:23:09,060 --> 01:23:10,010
So God help me,
1160
01:23:10,210 --> 01:23:13,570
don't you dare stand there\Nand tell me that I didn't know who he was.
1161
01:23:16,200 --> 01:23:17,200
I'm sorry.
1162
01:23:19,410 --> 01:23:20,410
Good.
1163
01:23:24,160 --> 01:23:26,080
Father, I'm so sorry about that.
1164
01:23:36,920 --> 01:23:40,240
Hey. What the hell did you think\Nyou were doing in there?
1165
01:23:40,440 --> 01:23:42,120
Look, I'm not here to cause any trouble.
1166
01:23:42,320 --> 01:23:45,120
Well, you did call my mom\Na "Hallmark hussy."
1167
01:23:45,320 --> 01:23:48,590
Yeah, words just kind of fall\Nout of my mouth sometimes and...
1168
01:23:48,790 --> 01:23:49,500
I don't know.
1169
01:23:49,700 --> 01:23:52,060
- Right. Understood.\N- Yeah.
1170
01:23:52,650 --> 01:23:56,240
My father reached out,\Nand he told us that he met a guy...
1171
01:23:57,030 --> 01:24:00,390
and that that guy said that\Nhe should call his family.
1172
01:24:00,590 --> 01:24:03,180
And I just wanted to say, because of you,
1173
01:24:03,380 --> 01:24:05,120
we got our dad back...
1174
01:24:06,250 --> 01:24:07,770
for a little while longer.
1175
01:24:07,970 --> 01:24:08,910
That's...
1176
01:24:10,120 --> 01:24:11,130
I'm glad.
1177
01:24:12,380 --> 01:24:13,670
And then this.
1178
01:24:15,880 --> 01:24:18,050
He wanted to make sure I gave it to you.
1179
01:24:21,760 --> 01:24:23,970
He said you'd know what to do with it.
1180
01:24:27,560 --> 01:24:28,640
I do.
1181
01:24:29,480 --> 01:24:30,390
Cool.
1182
01:24:48,330 --> 01:24:49,410
Could I just...?
1183
01:25:13,980 --> 01:25:16,020
Can I just get a moment with him?
1184
01:25:16,860 --> 01:25:18,400
Can you turn around, please?
1185
01:25:19,440 --> 01:25:20,280
Sorry.
1186
01:25:26,080 --> 01:25:27,080
Thank you.
1187
01:25:37,750 --> 01:25:38,750
Oh, Gary...
1188
01:25:40,670 --> 01:25:41,760
my lover...
1189
01:25:43,340 --> 01:25:44,340
my friend...
1190
01:25:46,600 --> 01:25:49,370
the day I penetrated your virgin hole...
1191
01:25:49,570 --> 01:25:50,710
Oh, my God.
1192
01:25:50,910 --> 01:25:52,430
...was the best day of my life!
1193
01:25:53,310 --> 01:25:59,220
And we may not be leaving this Earth\Nat the same time,
1194
01:25:59,420 --> 01:26:02,950
but at least we came together!
1195
01:26:09,700 --> 01:26:11,620
What the fuck are you doing?
1196
01:26:13,540 --> 01:26:15,040
Fuck. Fuck.
1197
01:26:21,590 --> 01:26:23,300
Let's do some gay shit, Gary.
1198
01:26:25,760 --> 01:26:29,560
Stop! Yo! Where are you going?
1199
01:26:30,640 --> 01:26:31,640
Are you--?
1200
01:27:30,740 --> 01:27:31,950
He's coming for you, Duke.
1201
01:28:10,280 --> 01:28:11,120
Fuck.
1202
01:28:15,700 --> 01:28:16,790
Fuck!
87831
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