All language subtitles for Hot Flashes (2013)

?? See the people
walking down the street ??

?? Fall in line
Just watching all their feet ?

?? They don't know
where they want to go ??

?? But they're walking in time ?

?? They got the beat. They got the beat ??
Oh, my God!

All right.
Come on, Armadillos!

?? They got the beat, yeah ??
Come on, Lady Armadillos!

-?? They got the beat ??
- Oh, oh, oh. Go, go, go, go!

Go, number 11!

?? All the kids
just getting out of school ??

?? They can't wait
to hang out and be cool ??

Good job, Millie!

?? They got the beat ??

- Millie, great.
- Ooh-whoo! That is my baby!

?? Yeah, we've got the beat ??

That Kayla Rash
is a bitch.

Beth.

Jocelyn needs to get along with Millie Rash
on the court,

so keep your comments
about her mom down a decibel, all right?

Block out! We gotta play better defense!
We can do that!

We gotta block out.
Ladies, we have been the state champions.

- Are we gonna let them take that from us?
- No!

I didn't think so.
Let's bring it on in!

Armadillos on three!
One, two, three.

Armadillos!

?? Go-go music
really makes us dance ??

?? Do the pony
Puts us in a trance ??

Come on, defense!
Get them!

?? Do the watusi
Just give us a chance ??

?? That's when we fall in line ?

?? 'Cause we got the beat
We got the beat ??

Nice pass, Jocelyn!

?? Yeah, we got it ??

?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??

?? Everybody, get on your feet ?

All right, guys,
get 'em!

?? We know you can dance
to the beat ??

-?? We got the beat ??

-?? Round and round and round ??
- Yes!

?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??
?? We got the beat ??

Watch the clock!
Watch the clock!

- Come on. Just one more.
-?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??
?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??
?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat
We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??
?? We got the beat ??

?? We got the beat ??
?? We got the beat ??

-?? We got the beat ????

Whoa!

Yeah!

Whoa! We smoked 'em!
We smeared 'em! They suck!

Yeah!

Armadillos!

The best of the best!

Yeah!

Mwah!

?? My granddaddy fought
in the great war ??

?? He told us stories
about how it was ??

I'm not supposed to be goin' through this
for a few more years.

Baby, close that door.
It's freezin' outside.

I'm thinkin' of
takin' up a new hobby.

Maybe pottery.

Or a blog.

Everyone says my Facebook posts
are really clever.

I'm still waitin' for you
to finish up your last hobby.

I'm done with the paper,
if you want to take up papier-m��ch?.

- Oh, no.
- What?

They are closing Tess's
breast cancer screening unit.

Tess's Traveling
Titty Tester.

Have a little respect.
She was my best friend.

Wow. It says they are...

"discontinuing services
due to a lack of funding."

Well, how can that be? Tess left them all that money.
I filed the paperwork myself.

It wasn't that much money,

and it's been three years
since she died.

But the state
was gonna match the money.

It should've lasted
longer than this.

Well, call her husband
and see if he knows anything about it.

He's too busy movin' his new bride out of her
sorority house to care about this.

You know,
this is Tess's legacy.

I cannot just sit by and do nothin',
like a lazy eye.

Are you closin'?

I can stay
if you need a screening.

No. I'm just
a concerned citizen.

I read in the paper
that y'all are closing for good?

Shame about the mix-up
with our state funding.

What mix-up?

Well, her money could've
lasted a lot longer...

'cause whoever filed the paperwork
didn't read that you have to reapply every year.

Too bad. I might be
out of a job myself.

I've gotten so attached
to Burning Bush.

I belong to the square
dancing group here.

Oh, speaking of which,
I would love to stay and visit,

but if I don't leave now,
I'll end up having to do-si-do with a girl...

'cause all the men'll
be taken.

I hate that. Bye.

Anyone who says...

that menopause isn't
the most divine time in a woman's life...

is a pessimist.

I carry a cattle prod
from my husband's ranch...

in my purse at all times,

so when a pessimistic thought about menopause
comes into my head,

I give myself a teensy zap.

This is the time
of your life...

when your inner goddess
emerges.

Mm-hmm.

And I'm not talkin' about some New Age pagan
kind of goddess.

I am talking about
a Judeo-Christian goddess.

And you no longer have to worry
about getting pregnant...

or getting whistled at by those handsome,
young ranch hands.

Menstruation is overrated.

Hot flash, missy?

Hot flashes.

Mood swings.

Achy joints.

Oh, yes.
Frequent urination.

It's all good.

Hello?

May I speak with Beth Humphrey?
This is Beth.

This is Liz Hulsey from the State Department
of Health.

I got your message about
Tess Muldoon Mobile Unit.

I am thrilled
when a generous donor like you calls,

especially with
our budget cuts.

Donor?
Oh, no, no, no, no. I just, um--

How much money would it cost
to get the mobile unit back in operation?

Let's see. 25,000 would cover the costs
for the rest of the year...

if you reapplied for state-matchin' funds
right away.

25,000?

Oh, Lord! I can't--
I can't afford 2,500.

Well, darlin', if you figure
out how to raise the money, you let us know.

We'd need it no later
than two months from tomorrow.

Call me if you have
any questions.

Bye-bye.

Bye.

Passes it quickly over
to the right.

Dribbling up to the side corner.
No, no.

No, no!

Ah. Mmm.

Beautiful pass!

Hmm.

Yes!

Go. No, no! Oh, come on.

Ah! The free throw line.
The first one was good.

Laurence?

Go, go, go, go, go!
No, no! Oh!

Where are your old Burning Bush High School
yearbooks?

They're in the hall closet,
I think. Why?

Just curious.

Ah-- Go on! Yeah!
Oh, I love this team.

Tess.

I stumbled across
Laurence's old yearbook,

and I saw that you were
on the basketball team in 1980.

That's when God
was still a boy.

I played some
in high school.

We didn't make state
like y'all, but I made first team all-district.

Did ya?
Mm-hmm.

You must still
really love basketball.

You haven't missed a game all year.
Mm-mmm.

You can't keep me away
from a Lady Armadillos game.

Well, next time I see you
sittin' by your lonesome,

I'm gonna make you
come sit by me.

Well, that'd be sweet.

I try to get my roommate
to come, but she's not into basketball.

I cannot believe
I have not met her yet.

Jewel, right?
Yeah.

She's not here much.
She works over in Jewett.

We're just... roommates.

You know, two single gals sharing expenses
until we meet the right man.

How long y'all
been roommates now?

Well, 16 years.

Whoa. That's a lot
of shared expenses.

There's nothing weird
about that.

Of course not.

Oh, Ginger, you are the least weird person
I know.

Yee-haw! Howdy, folks!

Come on down!

Hi there! Ginger Peabody.
Nice to meet ya.

Hi. Nice to meet you.

Wait-- J-- Just let me
get this straight.

You want us to play
a full-court game...

against the Lady Armadillos,
the state champs,

who are 30 years
younger than us?

Three games.
What?

If we sell out
three games,

we can make 15 grand on concession stand
and admission proceeds.

I figure we can raise the rest with
a bettin' pool.

Hell, men around here
write you off after 40,

so I know they'll
bet against us.

All we have to do
is bet on ourselves to win the pool.

That, and win two
out of the three games.

I have not stepped foot
on a basketball court in over 30 years.

So we'll practice.

When people hear that it's for charity,
the whole town will pay to come watch us.

Maybe I don't want the whole town watching me
make a fool of myself playing basketball.

No, I can't do it.
I'm sorry.

I know. Listen, listen.

Just come shoot baskets
with us Thursday night and then decide.

Who's "us"?

Florine.
She's committed.

Absolutely not!
No way, Jose!

Florine, you said you'd
do anything for Tess.

That's just
a figure of speech...

like "Break a leg"
or "I'm all ears" or "Have a nice day."

Nobody means those things
literally.

I'm too old
to play basketball.

We're all too old to play basketball.
Ginger's committed.

Well, bless Ginger's heart,
but Ginger's not the mayor.

Do you know how hard it is for a black woman
in these parts to get elected mayor?

This town's 90% white.

I'm not saying people here
are behind the times,

but some are still trying
to adjust to Bill Cosby being a doctor.

Are you saying
playing basketball's too black for you?

I'm saying I have
different priorities.

People think just because I took over
this job when J.C. died...

that I don't have what it takes
to get reelected.

Well, I'll prove them wrong by becoming
the first elected black mayor of Burning Bush.

I hate to burst your
civil rights bubble,

but any idiot in this town
who wouldn't vote for you...

'cause you act too black
or come on too strong...

isn't gonna vote for you,
period.

Why do you want
this job anyway?

You don't even get
a proper office.

What do you call this?

J.C. was a damn good mayor
for 10 years.

I intend to honor that
and keep his memory alive.

I understand you wantin'
to honor him and all, but--

Oh, and you'd understand
about losing a husband, would you?

Oh.

Florine, I'm sorry.

Look, I think that you are
the most capable person in this town,

but lately, you've been pretendin'
to be all proper.

But I can see, you need to
get your game on again.

I said no.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have important work to do.

I have to call the paper and let them know
the Little Miss Burning Bush Pageant...

has been postponed
due to lice.

Well, we're practicing Thursday night
if you change your mind.

What are you lookin' at,
white boy?

You know I am too old
to play basketball.

?? She's an all-American girl ??

?? An all-American girl ??

?? She will live-- ????

Beth?
Hey, Roxie.

Hey.

I haven't seen you
in ages.

What are you doin'
around here?

I came here to ask you to be a part
of somethin' important.

At least,
it's important to me.

Look, I'm real flattered
that you asked me,

but my basketball days
are over.

Mmm. Mmm.

Wow. This is good.

That's Mary Jane Mud Cake.

Mmm. Come on, Roxie.

You were on a championship team
in high school.

As soon as you get back on the court, it's all
gonna come back to you.

You don't get it, Beth.
I didn't have these babies back then.

I think you look
just fine.

Well, thank you,
but you're full of shit.

I do.

And I know that Tito still
thinks you're beautiful.

The only time
Tito notices me...

is when I'm blockin' the TV set
when Jennifer Lopez is on.

He'd rather see her big ass
than mine.

You want some more coffee?

Oh, please.
All right.

So I assume you were a post
and Florine a guard.

Now, who was
your other startin' forward?

It was Clemmy Baker.

She's Clementine Winks now.

Coach Slaughter's ex-wife?

Oh, yeah. She's a lot
of people's ex-wife.

Clementine Winks, huh?

I did not recognize her
in the photo.

Well, that's because now
she looks like 40 miles of bad road.

Bad karma, if you ask me.

I think she looks
pretty good.

Trust me, Beth. You don't want her
on your team.

Why not?
Let's put it this way.

When she hears
the word "hoedown," she hits the floor.

Okay.

I best be goin'.
Oh.

You didn't like the cake?
No, it was delicious.

I am just-- I gotta
save room for dinner.

Oh. You got such
a nice figure, Beth.

Well, maybe us practicin'
together, gettin' in shape for the games...

would be a good way for you
to get your figure back.

I'm sorry, Beth.
I just can't.

Well, we are practicin'
Thursday night...

if you change your mind.

Basketball.

That's a great idea, raising money
for Tess's memory.

You know, she was the only one who didn't
turn on me in high school.

When my fourth marriage
ended,

she showed up at my house
with a U-Haul to help me move.

And she was going through
radiation and chemo at the same time.

Bald as a baby's bottom.

Well, I had no idea.

Yeah.

She was really somethin'.

I hope this goes well
for y'all.

Well, we want you
to be on the team.

I can't.
Why not?

Well, a certain high school girls'
basketball coach.

I heard it was messy.

Oh, honey, you don't know
the half of it.

That skank humiliated me
in divorce court.

Took the house and didn't have to pay
a dime in alimony.

27.50.

No, I'm not gonna lose
to him again.

Who says
we're gonna lose?

Has your elevator stopped
going to the top floor?

Thanks, but no, thanks.

Well, we're practicin' Thursday night at 7:30
if you change your mind.

And remember,
this is for Tess.

Bye.

Shannon, will you quit readin' that thing
and get back to work.

It's not like
this job is hard.

Well, I'm goin'
for a smoke break.

Okay.
They're your lungs.

They are.

Mom?

Mom?
What are you doing here?

I'm meeting with Coach Slaughter
to schedule the games.

Oh, God. I can't believe you're
really serious about this.

I mean, personally, Mrs. H.,
I just wanna say...

I think it is so brave that y'all are gettin'
back out on the court...

after all these years.

Well, thank you, Millie.

Mom, have you thought about
the physical shape you need to be in to do this?

Of course. I'm givin' us
time to train.

Well, I mean, I know we're all really
looking forward to it.

So are we.
See ya on the court.

Oh, my God.

I cannot believe that your mom is actually
gonna do that!

I'm so embarrassed.
I mean, I would die.

I actually would just die.

It would benefit
the mobile unit.

Tess's Traveling
Titty Tester?

Mrs. Humphrey,
I have my reputation to think about.

It took me years to whip
my girls into winners.

They may be girls,
but they're still champs.

And you don't follow up a state championship
with a touchy-feely game like this--

even if it is
for a good cause.

Mind if I dip?

No.

Yeah. Clementine said you'd be afraid she
might beat you again.

What does my ex-wife
have to do with this?

Oh. Didn't I mention?
She's on our team.

All the more reason
to steer clear.

That woman's trouble.

Wait a minute. What do you mean I'd be
afraid she'd beat me again?

You know, with the divorce trial
and all.

I won that one...

in the eyes of the court
and of the Lord.

You know how people gossip.

Somend to believe her and think
that you won't play us...

'cause you're afraid
you might lose.

Afraid of losing to her?

That lazy tramp smokes
a pack a day!

Let's hope the school board doesn't
think that you're afraid...

to play a lazy tramp
who smokes a pack a day.

Beth?

You and yourladies--

And I use that term loosely
considering Clementine's involved--

are gonna have to stay
within 20 points of me and my girls...

in this first game.

Otherwise, there won't be
a second or a third.

Thank you.
It's a deal.

?? Stack of letters
lyin' by the phone ??

?? You don't call me back
'cause I ain't alone ??

I know you mean well,
but it's a crazy idea.

Look, Beth.

I don't want you to embarrass yourself
or your daughter.

Well, may the best girl win.

Mom, you're not a girl!

No matter how immature
you're actin' lately.

What are you talkin' about?
Are you embarrassed?

Mortified
is more like it.

Why can't you
just support me?

When Hillary Clinton ran for president,
Chelsea was right there.

The wind beneath
her wings.

Hillary didn't run
against Chelsea.

And she lost.

Beth, look.
We know you, baby.

You'll talk, talk,
talk this all over town.

And then, when you see
how hard it is...

or how not enough people
show up for the first game,

you'll lose interest and quit, like you quit
all your other hobbies.

What makes you think
not enough people will show up?

Baby. Well, you aren't exactly
leading ladies anymore.

Hey, y'all.
Hey, Mill.

Good mornin'.

When we get in there,
don't sit behind her hair.

We won't be able
to see the preacher.

Hey!

Am I too late?

Of course not.

The others must be
runnin' late too.

Hey, Ginger,
thanks for comin'.

Ah. My roommate Jewel's
mammogram at the mobile unit...

may have saved her life.

I'm sorry, Ginger.
I didn't know.

Ah, it's okay.
They caught it early.

Hey. Sorry I'm late.

You got room for these
saddlebags in here?

Howdy.

Hey, Ginger. How you doin'?
Pretty good.

P.S. I'm not wearin'
no gym shorts.

Okay. Oh!

God! Damn!

Excuse me.
Is this the WNBA tryout?

Ladies, y'all know Clementine.
Sure do.

Okay. We're gonna
take it slow.

Oh.

Looks like someone remembers
how to handle a ball.

Honey, I always remember
how to handle balls.

- Slut.
- Lard ass

Line up.

Hey, where's Florine?

- I thought you said she was committed.
- Yeah.

She is.

?? Round ya go
Circle 'em all up ??

?? Around the ring and all the way around
to get back home ??

?? Circle up forward
Break out into two lines ?

?? And a Ferris wheel
Around you go and center this ??

Whoo!

Whoa, right there!

Thank... you!

Yee-haw!
Thank you.

I'm Florine Clarkston.
I'm runnin' for mayor.

I hope I can count
on your vote for mayor.

What?

I'm running for mayor!
I prefer mustard.

Don't forget to vote.
Vote for Flo.

Beth. I didn't know
you square danced.

I didn't know that this was a stop
on the campaign trail.

Well, I just want the retired folks
in town to know...

that I will have their best interests
at heart as mayor.

What about the interests
of the women in town?

You know, if you joined our team,
you might actually have fun.

I'm sure y'all only remember the fun of
high school basketball.

What are you talking about?

During the play-offs
against Jasper,

the fans called me "Jumpin' Jigaboo"
throughout the entire game.

Well, most of those folks
wouldn't know shit from Shinola.

And I bet none of them
are running for mayor now.

I just wanted to let you know
we're practicing again tomorrow, 3:00.

I'll think about it.

Yippee! Ha-cha! Ha! Ha!

Oh, honey, nobody wants
to see your do-si-do.

Bless her heart.

Hi. Remember me?

I couldn't help
but overhear.

If you need a team manager,
I'm here to help.

All right, y'all.
Let's start practice.

- Here you go.
- Oh, thank you.

Hey, y'all.
Sorry I'm late.

Whoo! Whoo.

What the hell is that?

It's chocolate cheesecake,
so we don't all get low blood sugar.

That's not your, uh, special cannabis
chocolate cheesecake, is it?

No. It's just regular
old chocolate cheesecake.

It's fit for a Baptist.

Ginger!
Whoo!

Hey! Whoop.

Hey! Ha-ha!

Our fifth player is here.

I'm not here to play.

I'm here to talk you out
of this harebrained idea.

Look, we're all smart women.

I'm sure we can think of
another way to raise money.

How 'bout a bake sale,
or one of those silent auctions?

Take off those ridiculous shoes
and get out here with us.

You're not here
to play, huh, Florine?

You could've phoned in
your half-baked sale idea.

Well, if you're not gonna play,
I can call Charlotte Smoot.

I think she may be runnin'
for mayor this year.

Charlotte Smoot.
You gotta be kiddin' me.

I could run circles around Charlotte Smoot
on the court.

Bless her heart.
Oh, yeah?

Whoa! Ho-ho!

- Yeah!
- You still got it!

Ha-ha! Ladies, I believe
we have our startin' lineup.

Whoo! What are we gonna
call our team?

Oh, man. I never even
thought of a name.

Hey. Can you
throw me a towel?

Whoo!
Got a warm front rollin' in, Roxie?

- Uh-huh.
- Your own personal tropical splendor?

Hey. That's it.
That's the name of our team.

Tropical Splendor?

The Hot Flashes.

Personally, I have never
experienced a hot flash.

- You're such a liar!
- Oh, really?

Get outta here
with your bullshit.

Hey, Kayla.

Hi, Beth.

Millie told me
about this,

and I think it's great
you ladies will be taking on the Armadillos.

You do?
Oh. Uh-huh.

I was always too delicate
for sports myself.

Mmm.

I wanted to ask how you're gonna be handlin'
the concession proceeds.

I assume the church will be splittin' 'em
with the band, like with all the games.

You know,
as church secretary,

I just want to make sure
we're singin' from the same hymnal.

Sorry, Kayla. All the proceeds are goin'
to the mobile unit.

I have to find my husband.
No problem.

I have a package.

Honey.

Hello, Laurence!

Afternoon, ladies.

Honey, I hung up two posters,
but I thought it'd be okay...

since I am sleeping
with the postmaster.

Uh--

Well, since it's for
a good cause, all right.

There is more
than one good cause...

that could benefit here.

I would love to stay
and shoot the bull,

but then I'd be a widow.

I wanna finish hanging
the posters in town so I can get to practice.

Later, y'all.
See you at home.

Toodle-oo!

What can I do for you?

Hello?

Hello?

You know, I'm no longer licensed
by the state of Texas.

I'm not here about a pet.

You want me
to coach basketball?

I think you'd be perfect
for our team.

And why exactly
did you choose me?

My acumen
for slam-dunkin'?

You love basketball.
I've seen you at lots of the games.

And like I said,
this is for Tess.

She said you were amazing
when she had to put Reba down.

Yeah? Well, did she also
tell you why I lost my license?

If it's any consolation,
I think you were brave...

to kidnap those dogs
just to brush their teeth.

Well, aren't I
a lucky little bastard?

I must be the only one in town
who likes basketball and got along with Tess.

I chose you because you're
a little person and a felon.

And lots of people are scared of you
for one of those reasons.

And I chose you 'cause Tess said
you were compassionate.

And I chose you 'cause I didn't think
anybody else would do it.

I accept
your little coachin' job.

By the way,
you had me at "felon."

Ahh!

Ah!

All right. Now, Ginger, you stepped in
and you had great position,

but you gotta
box out strong.

Gotta put your butt
in it good.

And, Florine, stop worrying
about your hair.

I have to go
all the way to Waco for my hair.

Those little girls over
at Maybelle's Beauty Parlor,

they have no idea
what to do with this hair.

All right.
Let's do this again.

And, Roxie, try to hit
the rim this time.

Well, I had no idea
you were an expert at reboundin', Coach.

Roxie Adams,
you are so effin' rude!

Excuse me! It's Roxie Rosales
for the past 27 years!

And what's rude is sleepin'
with other people's husbands!

It was 30 years ago,
and you weren't married.

I had a ring
on my friggin' finger!

A class ring.

Oh, no, wait. Actually, it looked a little bit
more like a Cracker Jack ring.

Well, if you weren't
out all night parked with my Tito...

the night before
our big game at Elkhart,

we might've gone undefeated
senior year.

And maybe if you were eating more Mr. Rosales
and less Mr. Goodbar,

he wouldn't have
looked elsewhere.

I am gonna rip those worn-out nipples
right off of you!

Bring it on!

Hey, hey, hey!
, girl!

Hey! Stop it!

Stop it right now!

Everybody! Sideline! Now!

Get off!

Bitch!
Hey!

I feel like
it's my responsibility
as your coach...

to tell you this.

You'll never win if you keep beatin' the hell
out of each other!

There's only room
for one enemy now,

and that's the Armadillos.

Those girls--
they are younger and they are faster.

That's a fact of life.

So we need to use
our innate abilities.

- Like what?
- I-- I don't know.

It could be--
It could be anything.

What do y'all have
that they don't?

Lazy husbands?

Okay. Uh, it's a start.

- A cynical attitude.
- Now we're talkin'.

A weldin' license.

What?

I got it after
Flashdancecame out.

Everybody
was gettin' 'em.

A higher tolerance
for alcohol.

Tattoo coverin'
a C-section scar.

Nonexistent gag reflex.

Okay, okay. We just need
to figure out...

how to take full advantage
of these assets.

Sure, we gotta abide
by what the ref says,

but other than that,

there are no rules here.

What are you suggestin'?

Sayin',
if mama wants to win,

mama might
have to get her hands a little dirty.

Here you go.
Thank you. Good luck.

Hey, hey, hey, Roy!

Wow. Roxie.

What's the occasion?

No occasion.

Since you had to sell your Harley,
you don't ride with us anymore.

I just don't get
to see you that much.

If I remember correctly,

my Purple Haze Pecan Pie
was your favorite.

Oh, you got that right.

Hey, how's business
goin', Roy?

Oh, not so good. I gotta put in twice the number
of hours just to get by.

Yeah. I heard you had to take on a second job
just to help pay the bills.

What was that?

I referee
basketball games.

That's right.

Yeah.

Oh, well. Here ya go, Roy.

You enjoy that now. Okay?

Oh, hello, old friend.

Thank you, Roxie!

All right. I want to see some tough
broads out here today!

Let's go!

Come on, Clementine!

Let's go.

Go. Boom, boom!
Get those hips moving.

Get that ball around that hip.

Lift 'em!

To the left! To the left!
Shotgun!

To the right!
To the right! Shotgun!

Go! Get 'em up there!
Get those knees up!

?? Shake that body ??

Let's go!

Quick! Quick! Quick!
Quick! Quick! Quick!

Quick! Quick!

Bitch!

?? Many different flavors ??

Come on! Let me see you
flow with me!

?? Get into the hot stuff
Let me pour a little song ??

Come on! Finger shift.
Finger shift.

?? How to do this
You've gotta move this ??

-?? You're doin' fine ??
- Come on!

?? Ain't nothin' to it. You gotta groove it ??
Let's go!

?? Come on and move this ??

?? Shake that body ??

?? Shake that body for me ??

?? Shake it, shake it ????

?? Well, I never did think
that I did him no wrong ??

Hey, y'all.
Hi.

No one is bettin'
in the bettin' pool.

We have less
than 200 bucks.

- No.
- Maybe, if we just kick ass in the first game,

more people will show up
for the second one.

Well, our uniformsners.

Look what Roxie designed
and Ginger had printed up.

Oh, Roxie!
You're so talented!

I know.

Oh, it's funny. I've spent half my life
as a housewife...

and totally suck
at sewin' and cookin'.

What have I been doin'
all these years?

Beth, you've been
raisin' a daughter.

And taking care
of a husband.

Well, I'm not too sure
about that.

Beth, everything okay
with you and Laurence?

I don't know.

But I should be grateful
that he puts up with me.

I don't know what I'd do
if he didn't.

Oh, God. Don't
be grateful for that.

You know what you do if a husband walks out
on you? Lock the door.

I wouldn't take relationship advice
from her.

Oh, shut up.
Uh-uh-uh.

I look at Jocelyn,
and I know we at least did one thing right.

Mmm. Count your blessings,
Beth.

Not all of 'em
turn out that good.

Hey, Mrs. H.
Hey, y'all.

Oh, my goodness.
Your uniforms are so cute.

You know, it was real smart of y'all to get
T-shirts that cover the back of your arms.

Watch your mouth,
Millie Rash.

I mean, they all probably wanna cover up
as much as they can...

just to make sure one of their teammates
doesn't check them out.

Whoo! Look at the time.
I have gotta go let the dogs out.

My roommate's still at work.
So I'll see y'all later.

Bye, Ginger.
Bye, Ginger.

Take care, Ginger.

By the way, have y'all met
her roommate Jewel?

I've never once
laid eyes on her.

It's kinda like she's embarrassed by her
or somethin'.

Maybe she's got
a wonky eye.

Come on, y'all.
It's obvious.

We haven't met her
because Ginger's not ready to come out.

I mean, Burning Bush isn't exactly
Brokeback Mountain.

Do a jab step,
one fake, one triple

Execute a full fake...

and take one hard dribble
in the opposite direction.

That supposed to be
a jab step, pump fake?

I didn't hear you come in.

Give me the Butterball.
I'll show you.

See, the trick
is in your waist, not your feet.

Yeah.

Works best when a player's made a bunch
of points from a particular spot on the court.

Defense won't be
expecting the fake.

I don't think we should
be discussing the game.

Coach says that I'm
supposed to look at y'all like the enemy.

Oh, okay. Well, I guess the enemy doesn't
need to help with dinner.

Hmm.

?? Baby, baby ??

?? Baby, baby ??

?? Baby, baby
Ba-Baby, baby ??

Is that rap music
you're listening to?

It's vintage
Salt-N-Pepa.

It's notraprap.

Oh, my God!
Well, what's it look like out there?

I have seen more people
in a minivan.

Tito's not even here. And he doesn't have
anywhere else to go.

Well, what's it look like
in the bettin' pool?

There's only
about $400 in there.

Oh!
Maybe Laurence was right.

Maybe nobody wants to see a bunch of
middle-aged women play basketball.

How can we raise any money
if nobody's bettin' against us?

Hey!

We still got a job
to do tonight.

Gotta go out there and show this town
what we're made of.

What town?
Nobody's even here.

Have you all forgotten
what's at stake here?

Our dignity?

Oh, hell. You-- You're forcing me to go
all Lifetime television for women on you now.

My aunt-- Aunt Rowena--

she, uh-- she died
of breast cancer.

She lived in a little Podunk town hours away
from a doctor...

or a decent strip club.

If the town had
a mobile unit,

then maybe they would have caught it early,
and she'd still be here today.

Is that true?

Only a really small man would lie about
somethin' really big like that.

Now, am I the only one
not ready to give up on this mobile unit?

No.
Then what are we all waitin' for?

Gene Hackman to show up?
Let's go!

Hit it.

?? Ooh, baby, baby
Baby, baby ??

?? Ooh, baby, baby
Ba-Baby, baby ??

?? Salt-N-Pepa's here
and we're in effect ??

?? Want you to push it, babe ??

?? Coolin' by day
then at night working up a sweat ??

?? Come on, girls, let's go
Show the guys that we know ??

?? How to become number one
in a hot party show ??

?? Now push it ??

?? Push it ??

?? Push it ??

?? Push it ??

?? P-P-Push it, push it ??

?? Push it, push it ??

?? Push it, push it, push it ???

Where's Roy?
He's supposed to be reffin' this game.

Ate some bad clams.

All right.
Let's go, ladies! Let's go!

Yes!

Air ball.

Airhead!

One.

Whoo!

Come on. Pick it up!

Yeah! Kinda like
shootin' fish in a barrel!

Fight, fight, fight!

That one's mine, girls.

Hey!

Whoa!

Clemmy! Wide open!
Wide open!

What the--

God!

Yeah! Good one! Whoo-hoo!

Who would've thought that?

Oh!

Yes, sir!

There we go!

There we go!
I like that!

Nice pick, Jocelyn.

Good shootin', Millie.
All right. Here we go.

All right, ladies.
No mercy, all right?

Look, I don't wanna
be comin' back here for no game two.

All right. Come on, ladies.
We can do this!

If we don't get within 20 points,
the mobile unit is history.

Come on.
Hot Flashes on three!

One, two, three!

Hot Flashes!
Yeah!

?? Keep pushin' ??

?? Keep pushin' ??
Go, go, go!

?? Keep pushin' ??

Come on! Let's go! Come on!
?? You've got the drive. You've got the push ??

?? Just keep it goin'
Don't stop to look ??

?? Input the drive
Go harder, go harder ??

?? Go-get-it attitude ??

?? Life is like this
Play your position ??

?? It's exactly what
the game is missing ??

Go, Florine!

Roxie! Put it in!

Go ahead! Go ahead!

vote
That'll show 'em who's boss ??

Whoa!

?? You heard it before,
but I'm-a say it again ??

?? It takes two to tango,
only one to win ??

Hit the rope! Come on!

?? Keep pushin' ??

Yeah!

?? Keep pushin' ??

?? Yo ??

?? Keep pushin' ??
Right there! Rebound!

- Yeah!
- Yes!

?? Keep pushin' ??
One more.

Let's go!
Let's go!

Let's go! Let's go!
Let's go, Florine. Come on!

Oh, my God.

Oh!

- Shoot!
-?? Keep pushin' ????

Yeah!

She tried to feel me up!

What'd she say?
What?

That's a lie.
Millie.

Oops.

Why'd you say that?

Chillax.
I was just jokin'.

Good game.

Good game, good game.

Good game, good game,
good game.

Good game.
Good game.

Well, at least you said
somethin' about that heathen.

Did you see her face?

Oh, hi, Beth.

Looks like you get to
continue your little match.

Good game.

Would've been if your daughter hadn't pulled
that stunt with Ginger.

Oh. It was a joke.

Besides, the whole town
knows that Ginger is--

that kind.

If your daughter
can't accept others,

at least you can teach her
some tolerance.

Isn't tolerance just
a fancy way of sayin'...

that we're puttin' up with somethin'
that we know is wrong?

How 'bout
some basic respect?

Millie respects the Bible.

Yeah.
It's real specific.

Oh. Well, as long as
we're talkin' specifics,

I believe the Bible's real clear about what you
and Darryl Lee were doin'...

at the mini golf course
last week.

If you say one more
derogatory thing about Ginger,

I got a real juicy Facebook post
waitin' to go out...

telling everybody in town how our miniature golf
course now has a 19th hole.

See y'all in church.

Don't you threaten
my daughter!

You think you're such hot stuff
around here, don't you?

You and your foulmouthed
team are a bad influence on those girls.

Oh, we'll see who
this community listens to.

Come on, Millie!

Darryl Lee? Young lady,
you are so grounded!

Hey, baby.

Mm-mm-mm.

Why don't you let me
lick those fingers for ya?

We got any more of
that 420 flan, baby?

No.

But I think
I got somethin' real sweet...

you might like
right here.

Where you goin', baby?

Is she still out there?
Yeah.

Thought she'd be tired
of this by now.

I give her another...
week.

I think this is different, Dad.
Hmm?

She's been staying up
every night practicin'.

I think her whole team
is really serious about this.

Yeah?

Okay.

Uh-huh.

- Hey, baby.
- Where you been?

I've been quail-huntin'
with Dan Metcalf.

It's after 8:00.

I don't wanna argue.
I'm tired.

I found a hair clip
in the pickup.

I'm 99% sure
it's not Jocelyn's,

and I'm 100% sure
it's not mine.

What is this,
"Special Victims Hair Clip Unit?"

Those hormones
are messin' with you.

I'm gonna take a shower
and go to bed.

What's wrong?
You are.

What did I do?

Eavesdropping on my phone conversations
and using it to get Millie grounded?

A mother doesn't eavesdrop.
She pays attention.

And that girl deserved it
after what she did to Ginger.

She and the rest of the team are
barely speakin' to me.

I'm gonna have to write
her English term paper to make it up to her.

Since when are you
and Millie Rash best friends?

She's the most popular girl
on my team. And my team is important to me.

Well, maybe my team's
important to me too.

Your team goes away in two weeks.
I'm with mine for the rest of the year.

?? Yeah ??

?? Oh, yeah ??

?? Ooh-ooh ??

?? Yeah ??

?? Yeah, yeah ??

?? Hey! ??
?? Get it on ??

?? Step into the ring
with the hip, hip-hop ??

?? Gotta make it real
when you make it drop ??

?? Groovy, woozy,
wicked, funky ??

?? So delicious
This is chunky ??

?? Gotta get it good
Get it cranking ??

?? Gotta get it tasty,
sweet and stankin' ??

?? Make it all good
and do your thing ??

?? Step it up
and make it swing ??

?? Yeah, yeah ??
?? Make it, make it swing ??

?? Yeah, yeah ??

?? Make it swing ??
?? Yeah ??

?? Come on,
make it swing ??

?? Oh, yeah ??

Come on, Flo.
Let's go. I-I'll be there.

?? Then you gotta go
and you gotta let it flow ??

?? Yeah ??
?? Make it real and let it show ??

?? Yay ??
?? Make it, make it swing ??

?? Yeah ??
?? Make it swing ??

?? Yeah ??
?? Make it swing ????

There's only $1,500
in the betting pool.

Doesn't look like much more
of a turnout tonight.

We'll come up with somethin'.

All right, ladies.
Gather round.

Where's Florine?

All right. I'm ready.

What?

All right.
The mobile unit is ridin' on us tonight.

If we lose this game,
we're not gonna get a third.

If you gals put on
a good show tonight,

they're gonna tell their friends
to come out next game.

It's called
"word of mouth."

So remember:
mind over matter.

If the refs don't mind,
it don't matter.

Hot Flashes on three.

One, two, three!

Hot Flashes!

?? Are you ready? ??

?? Drop that, drop-drop that
Drop-drop, drop-drop that ??

?? Drop, drop, drop that ??

?? Five, four, three, two, one ?
?? Check 'em out ??

Hips don't lie,
sweetheart.

- That was a foul.
- That's a foul.

It's cool, dude.

What was that?

Get it!

She stepped on her foot.
On her foot!

Yes!

Hey, that's a foul!
Intentional!

Nice hair.

Thank you!

Hello! That was a foul.

What in the Sam Hill?

Oh!

I know how starved
you must be for attention.

I mean, my mama told me how hard it is to get
a husband after a certain age.

Why buy the cow
when you can get the milk for free?

Who needs a husband?

I mean, why buy the pig
when all you need is a little sausage?

Ew.

Score's right.
Cool.

Hot Flashes' ball.
Hey.

I intend to file a complaint
with the referee's association.

And don't pretend you don't know
what I'm talkin' about.

You'll never work
in this state again, dude.

Wow.

Oh, my God!

?? When I think of myself,
I move like this ??

?? If you throw yourself,
then move like this. Now do it ??

- Yeah!
-?? Now do it ??

?? When I think of myself,
I move like this ??

?? If you true to yourself,
then move like this. Now do it ??

?? Just do it ??

Whoo!

Let's go, ladies.

?? Wanna rock like me,
gotta rock like this ??

?? Now do it ??

?? Do it ??

?? Wanna rock like me,
gotta rock like this ??

Rebound!
Rebound!

?? Do it ??

Get back, ladies.
Come on, come on!

One more. Come on, Flo!

Yeah!

Coach! Did you see that?
I know, I know.

We got some celebrating to do.
Drinks on me! ladies!

Whoo! Beautiful shot!

Yeah!
That's the way, Florine!

Whoo!

?? Dialed about
a thousand numbers, baby ??

?? Almost rang the phone
off the wall ??

?? I'm lookin' for some hot stuff,
baby, this evenin' ??

- ?? I want some hot stuff ?
? - ?? Hot stuff ??

?? Baby, tonight ??

?? I'm gonna have a hot flash ??

?? Baby, this evening ??

?? Gotta love a hot flash
Gonna leave the town tonight ?

Whoo!

?? I got a hot flash ??

?? You want a hot flash? ??

?? Hot flash ??

Beth, where's Laurence?
I thought he was comin' by to celebrate?

No, he had to go back
to the post office. Yeah.

Ever since the layoffs,
he has just been workin' overtime every night.

Honey, you look like
a million bucks.

Now, you need to go down to that post office
and tempt him with a special delivery.

I am not tempting
him much lately.

Honey, in that dress, you could tempt most
of the men in this town,

including a couple
of the women.

Okay, ladies.
To the Hot Flashes!

?? Wanna bring a wild man
back home ??

?? I'm lookin' for my hot stuff
Mmm.

Mmm. That was
quite a game tonight.

I'm with the Waco Register.

I've seen your posters all over town. I'm always
lookin' for a good story.

Mind if I take
some photos of your team?

Oh, hell. Nobody wants to see a photo of my big
ass in the newspaper. That's for sure.

My name's Clementine Winks.
W-I-N-K-S.

You need some photos?
I do.

Why don't you come here with me,
and I'll tell you how the team got started.

She's like a gopher
in soft dirt.

We could use the publicity.
Get some people out for the last game.

Next round on me.
I sold the pickup today.

Hey!
Hey, hey, hey!

Good girl!

Hey, none for me.
I'm drivin' home.

Oh, can I get a ride?
The post office is on the way.

I think I might actually surprise Laurence tonight.
Good for you!

See if his tipsy wife
can tempt him now.

Hey, Beth. Don't forget,
you're still in training.

You gotta save some of that energy
for the last game.

Aye, aye, sir.

- Here you go, boss.
-Adios, amiga!

Yeah.

I'm gonna ride you like a pony!
Come on!

Watch out.

Uh-oh.

Butt in the gut. Butt in the gut.
Oh! Hey.

That is not my gut!
Ah!

?? I want some hot stuff,
baby, tonight ??

?? I need a hot flash, baby ??

?? Hot stuff ??

?? Hot stuff ??

?? Hot stuff ????
All right. Wish me luck.

Have a great time!

Thank you.
Great game tonight, girl!

See ya tomorrow!

Seal that envelope.

Where's your stamp?
Look for the stamp.

Track and confirmed.
I like it.

Oh, no,
don't you go express.

Not this time.

Yes!
Put your bulk mail in me.

Go postal on me!

Oh. Oh!

What was that?
What was that?

Beth.

Beth!
Open the door.

I don't wanna wake Jocelyn.
I need to talk to you.

Beth, please.

Open the door.
I can explain.

Beth, please.

Looks like somebody celebrated a little
too hard last night.

Yeah. Guess I'm not
as young as I used to be.

Bacon's supposed to be good
for hangovers.

- I don't wanna be late for school. Bye, Dad.
- Bye-bye, baby.

Good-bye, Jocelyn.

I don't know what to say.
Why her?

Do you love her?

Be honest with me.
I deserve that. Do you love her?

What about her husband?
He's away, workin' on an oil rig.

Oh, isn't that convenient for you both.
Do you love her?

- We'll talk when you calm down.
- You come back here!

Every time you don't wanna hear somethin',
you just walk away or you ignore me.

Beth, what do you
want me to say?

That spark we used to have?
I wanna feel it more than once a year.

I'm too young
to feel this damn old.

When you sink a three-pointer
for the Hot Flashes, you feel 18 again.

That's how I feel with her.

She's not comin'.

Why?

?? If you only knew ??

We know you're in there.

Did y'all know about her?

No. No.
Of course not.

We didn't know, Beth.

But we know you're gonna
get through this.

Mm-mmm. I think
he's gonna leave me.

Yeah. When Jocelyn goes off to college.
And I'll be totally alone.

You will not be totally alone.
You've got us.

You got a whole
posse now, girl.

I'm afraid my basketball days
are over.

But you can't quit now.

Hey. Listen.
Havin' a pity party isn't gonna help anything.

Believe me, honey,
I know.

I thought takin' on those girls
might help Laurence...

see me the way
he used to.

Whatever happens
between you and Laurence,

he can't take this
away from you.

This was your idea.

Y'all should know that I'm the reason why the
mobile unit ran out of money.

I forgot to reapply
for the matching funds.

I never told you
'cause I was so ashamed.

You don't get it, Beth.

This whole thing is so much bigger
than you are now.

Didn't you read the story
in the Waco paper today?

All right.
Read it to her.

Let me see.
Blah, blah, blah.

"Word has spread like wildfire
across the Internet...

about the Burning Bush
Hot Flashes.

And several similar
basketball teams of middle-aged women...

have sprung up around Texas
to raise money for breast cancer,

including
the Waco Mood Swings,

the Crawford Crying Fits
and the Plano Night Sweats."

You see, Beth. If you quit,
you wouldn't just be quittin' on yourself.

You would be quittin'
on all of us.

Come on, Beth.
Come on, Beth.

- Come on, Beth.
- Beth.

The gym is closed.

You ladies might as well
turn around and go home.

We're fixin' to practice.

Sorry. But you're banned
from playin' on school property.

What?
Who banned us?

The school board.
They said your whole team...

was a bad influence
on the kids of Burning Bush.

They had a page-long list
of improprieties.

What fucking improprieties?

Hey. What about
our final game?

Canceled.
What?

I'm not exactly thrilled to have our last game
of the season be a loss...

to an inferior team,

but the school board
has made up its mind.

The gym is locked.

Ooh.
I hate that man.

We have to let them know
that this is wrong.

And how we gonna do that?
I don't know.

They have their weekly meeting tomorrow night.
I'll think of somethin'.

Miss Humphrey, I'm afraid
you're wasting your time.

We discussed this at length
before we voted.

What did we do
that was so horrible?

Smokin'. Bribing referees.

Promotin' homosexuality.

And excessive profanity.

Okay, so maybe we made
some folks uncomfortable,

but if we promise to be
on our best behavior...

in the last game,
would you take another vote?

These are serious grievances.
Now, we've made our decision. We're sorry.

Now, if you don't mind,
we have a lot of other business to discuss,

and we'd like to get home
to our families before midnight.

Oh, it's funny
you should mention your families.

Your wives, Frida, Fay,
Jodelle, Lanette, Sissy.

They were all
high school cheerleaders.

Yeah. So?

So, don't you think
you ought to consider their feelings...

about canceling their last-ever opportunity
to be a cheerleader?

What are you talkin' about?

Well, I called each of 'em
on my way here.

They were awfully excited
about doin' a half-time performance.

Oh, you're talkin' crazy now.

Well, why don't you
call your wives and ask if it's crazy?

You wouldn't want them findin' out later
that you didn't check in with them...

before cheatin' them
out of this opportunity.

I'll give you gentlemen
a moment of privacy.

Beth.

Do you plan to keep seein' her?
I need to know.

Keep your voice down.
Jocelyn's asleep.

Answer the question.

It's not that simple.

Well, let me simplify it
for you.

I'm playin' my last game
with the Hot Flashes Friday night.

If you plan to keep seein' her,
don't come.

?? Yeah ??

?? Oh, yeah ??

?? Ooh-ooh ??

?? Yeah ??

I'm as nervous
as a long-tailed cat...

in a room full of
rockin' chairs.

I haven't been this nervous since--
State championship game, 1980.

Exactly.
Me neither.

I'm sorry I'm late.
Holy crap, there's a lot of people out there!

Damn. Look at you, hot mama!

Girl. You got it,
you gotta flaunt it.

Ladies! Ladies,
we got a packed house out there tonight.

That bettin' pool is gonna put us over
the $25,000 mark.

Now, we just gotta
go out there and win!

God.

All right. If-If that doesn't crank
your engines--

That little bit
of newspaper publicity we got?

Went viral.

You are not gonna believe
who is out there.

Who?

Good Morning America.

What?
Get out!

Shut up!
Damn.

They wanna shoot
a pregame interview with one of our players.

They're settin' up
right now.

So. Who's it gonna be?

Beth. You thought
of this whole thing.

Yeah. Beth.
Yeah.

Come on. Florine,
you're runnin' for mayor.

Ginger, this could do
wonders for your dealership.

Yeah.

You're lookin'
pretty hot.

I'm just sayin'.

I think
it's gotta be Roxie.

Right?
Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.
Really?

Damn, girl.

Good Morning America!

Go get 'em, Roxie!

Be sure to join us later this week when we'll
show you the Hot Flashes,

a basketball team
comprised of women of a certain age,

who are taking on
the state high school champs,

to raise money to help save their
local mammogram unit.

So tell us why you're doing this.
Well, it's a great cause.

And we just wanna show the world
that women our age--

We still got game!
Whoo!

I'm a breast cancer survivor myself,
so I gotta say thank you, and bless you,

and go on
with your bad self.

Hey, I-- I gotta go.
Um-- Gotta go suit up for the game.

You do that. See ya later.
Thanks for comin'.

You got it.
All right.

She's the real deal.

All right. It's a big turnout, ladies.
Here we go, Florine.

Thanks.
Clementine. Ginger.

Beth. You okay?

I don't think
he's comin'.

Oh. Don't worry.
He'll show.

Hi, y'all.

- Who was that?
- My roommate.

My partner.

- That's Jewel?
- Mm-hmm.

Now, go ahead, Ginger.

All right, ladies.
This is it.

What's more important
than us winning?

Them losin'.
That's right.

Hot Flashes on three.

One, two, three.
Hot Flashes!

Yeah.

Get back. Get back!

Yeah. Now get back.

All right.
Come on, Flo.

Come on.

Come on, Beth.

No, no, no!

Yes!

All right.
Let's go, ladies. Let's go!

Hands up!

All right, Flo.
All right.

Come on, Beth.
You got this.

Go, Clemmy!

Yeah, babe.
You scored, babe!

We'll let Number 7
shoot anytime.

?? Uh! ??

?? Uh, huh, ow ??

?? She's a brick house ??

?? She's mighty, mighty ??

?? Just lettin' it all
hang out ??

?? Ah, she's a brick ??

?? House ??

?? That lady's stacked,
and that's a fact ??

?? Ain't holdin' nothin' back
Ooh! ??

?? She knows
she's got everything ??

?? That a woman needs ??

?? To get a man
Yeah, yeah ??

?? How can she lose
with what she use? ??

Oh, my God!
Ah!

?? 36-24-36 ??

?? Oh, what a winnin' hand
Shake it! ??

?? Shake it down
Shake it down. Shake it now, now ??

?? Shake it down
Shake it down. Shake it now, now ??

We are not playin'
a bad game overall.

Even though some of us
aren't hittin' our shots.

Now, no one thought we could keep up
with the state champs.

But this game--

your game--

It's only half over.

Anything can happen
in the second half.

I know this has been hard
on some of ya.

But I also know that you can rise
to the occasion.

Look.

People have been sayin' to me,

you know, those gals of mine,
they're good for their age.

I tell 'em they're wrong.

Those gals of mine,
they are good for any age.

So now, let's get back
out there and-and...

make fun of their acne!

Yeah!

Beth. We can't win this
without ya.

Get your head
in the game.

Ball's in.

Take it to the hole.

You never did much of that
during our marriage, now, did ya?

Yeah, yeah.

Denied. How's that feel, huh?
Was that good for you?

It was good for me.

You got it, Beth.

- Yes!
- Yeah! There you go.

Whoo!

?? We don't cronk
We don't clown ??

?? We do it old school
and break it on down ??

?? Break it on down
Break it on down ??

?? We do it old school
and break it on down ??

?? Break it on down
Break it on down ??

?? Do it old school
Break it on down ??

?? Do it old school
and break it on down ??

?? Do it old school
and break it on down ??

Injury time-out.

Okay.

Mom!

Mom, are you okay?
I'm okay. I'm all right.

You okay?

All right, let's go, ladies.
Come on.

All right.
Everybody take a seat.

You sure you're okay?
Yeah. I'm fine.

We need ya out there.
I'm okay.

Roxie. Okay, ladies, it's comin'
down to the wire.

I'm really proud of y'all.
You're doin' great. We can do this!

Just remember. You gotta rebound, Roxie.
Rebound, rebound, rebound.

Beth, you keep lookin'
for your shot, all right?

Florine, you drive
to that basket.

Clementine. Nice leg warmers.
Thanks, Coach.

- Remember, Ginger. Butt in the gut. Butt in the gut.
- Got it, Coach.

Morrey. How'd you like
to go out to dinner?

I'd like that.
Okay. All right.

All right, here's what we're
gonna do, okay? Ready?

Now what's gonna happen is, Florine's gonna
take the ball in, drive down the lane.

- Ginger, I want you to sit up and post.
- Why did you do that?

Accidents happen.

Daddy!

Millie did the nasty with Glenn at the lake
last week.

The day after
he gave you his ring.

Then she did Bo...

while you were at
the Fun Run Friday.

And I don't even know the correct term for what
she and John Ray did...

while you were teachin'
Bible school.

Oops. Did I say that
out loud?

- Accidents happen.
- Why, you little--

?? Yeah ??

?? Yeah ??

?? Yeah ??

?? Yeah, yeah, yeah ??

Ball.
Give me the ball!

Hey, I'm open!
I'm open!

Go! Go, go, go, go, go!

Get in there, Millie.

Aha! Yes, yes! Yeah.

?? Yeah ??

Yes! You got it.

- Come on, Flashes!
- Go!

Come on, Flashes.
Get back, get back. Get your hands up.

All right.

Go, go, go!

Defense!

Come on!
Pass that ball.

Butterball!

Oh!

?? Never shut up
Never give in ??

?? Never gonna keep
my feet on the ground ??

?? Never back down
Never fit in ??

Whoo! Yeah!

Daddy!

Oh, there she is. Mmm.
You did such a good job. You did.

But we lost.
I know, but he's here.

It doesn't always go
the way we--

He's not going away anymore.
He's gonna be working here now.

- Daddy, really?
- Yeah.

I've missed you so much.

Beth.

Good game.
I'm so proud of you.

How come you didn't come to the game
until the fourth quarter?

You didn't end it with her.

She ended it with you.
What difference does it make who ended it?

It's over.

It's a big difference.

Give me the keys.

Give me the car keys.

You can find
your own way home.

It is over.

Beth, face it.

You can't make it
all alone.

At your age?

You're right.
I can't.

But I'm not alone.

Hey. Looking good.

Hey, Beth.
Thanks. Bye.

?? Hey, you fool,
want a little taste? ??

?? What you used to have? ??

Florine, that is
a great picture.

Next stop, governor.

Now that you're an elected official,
can you do something...

about that annoying pothole
down by the church?

I'm sorry. But Kayla Rash
is here to stay.

Bless her heart.

Beth, how is Jocelyn
doin' off at college?

Oh, good. I miss her.

That's the way
it's supposed to be.

In fact, that's gonna be the title
of my next blog.

"Tools For Goin' It Alone."

You might wanna
rethink that title.

People are gonna think
you're talkin' about vibrators.

And I would listen to her,
'cause she's an expert.

And proud of it.
Mmm.

Y'all believe that my little
Web site is actually turnin' a nice profit?

Well, how could you lose
with that name?

BethWon'tShutUp.com.

Sort of says it all.
Uh-huh.

- Ooh, ooh, ooh, y'all.
- Ah, y'all.

Would you look at that.

Ooh!

Shall we?
Mm-mm-mm!

A reliable source says
they're livin' together.

Guess they decided to eat supper
before they say grace.

You know what they say?
Once you go small--

- You never go tall.
- Mm-hmm.

Who says that?
Nobody says that.

We say it.
Yeah.

- Don't.
- Don't.

?? Ain't life a funny thing ??

?? When everything
is goin' so fine? ??

?? Don't it throw us
for a curve? ??

?? Oh, it happens
all the time ??

?? But that ain't no mystery ??

?? But what's so crazy? ??

?? I don't need to tell you
You don't need to tell me ??

Yee-haw!
Howdy, folks. How you doin'?

?? I keep on goin' forward
to keep from movin' backward ?

?? I have to tell ya,
I got no objection ??

?? It feels so good to be ??

?? Leaning in a new direction ??

?? Don't ya know
with every step ??

?? I'm feelin' more powerful? ??

?? Like I've just got
a little edge ??

?? Maybe unstoppable ??

?? Here comes another day ??

?? Gotta keep the faith ??

?? I don't need to tell you
You don't need to tell me ??

?? I can see what's comin'
and so can you ??

?? Keep on goin' forward
to keep from movin' backward ?

?? I have to tell ya,
I got no objection ??

We all love Tess.

Motherfu--
I trusted that it's not gonna hit her.

?? Yeah, I think
I've finally learned ??

?? How to take the turns ??

Ready. Ready.

Ooh.
A camera with no filter.

I'm worried.

I'm okay.

Oh, my God!

?? I don't need to tell you
You don't need to tell me ??

?? I can see what's comin'
and so can you ??

?? I keep on goin' forward
to keep from movin' backward ?

?? I have to tell ya,
I got no objection ??

?? Hot Flash ??

?? It feels so good to be ??

?? Leaning in a new direction ??

Look, I'm in a box.

Oh, man.
I can't get out.

Whoo!

?? Man, it feels so good ??

?? Feels so good ??