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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 0 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,000 Downloaded From www.AllSubs.org 1 00:00:43,820 --> 00:00:45,650 Well, we're here. 2 00:00:45,780 --> 00:00:47,740 Yeah, we are. 3 00:00:51,340 --> 00:00:55,490 Oh, you just look so grown-up in that new jacket. You do. 4 00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:57,290 - OK, Bones, take care. - Now... 5 00:00:59,820 --> 00:01:01,860 here is your bus ticket. 6 00:01:01,980 --> 00:01:03,490 - Jonathon! - Argh! 7 00:01:03,620 --> 00:01:06,450 - Take care of yourself. - I will. 8 00:01:06,580 --> 00:01:08,730 Call us when you get there, OK? 9 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:10,420 Dad. 10 00:01:13,580 --> 00:01:17,490 - See you over the holidays. - Oh, I'm so proud of you! 11 00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:19,180 Mom. 12 00:02:03,020 --> 00:02:04,980 Hi. How you doin'? 13 00:02:18,540 --> 00:02:21,900 - Check out that geek. - 14 00:02:22,020 --> 00:02:24,850 - Nice jacket! - How are things on Neptune? 15 00:02:32,980 --> 00:02:34,940 Nice. Real nice. 16 00:02:35,660 --> 00:02:38,700 - How you doin'? - Welcome aboard, stranger. 17 00:02:54,860 --> 00:02:56,820 Great, douche bag. 18 00:02:58,300 --> 00:03:00,020 Yeah. 19 00:03:00,140 --> 00:03:02,290 Another year, another idiot. 20 00:03:03,780 --> 00:03:06,140 21 00:03:07,060 --> 00:03:10,210 You'll be stayin' here with me tonight 22 00:03:12,380 --> 00:03:15,530 You're gonna love me overnight 23 00:03:15,660 --> 00:03:17,220 Entrez. 24 00:03:19,660 --> 00:03:21,410 - Hey! You must be Jonathon! - Yeah. 25 00:03:21,540 --> 00:03:23,930 Squire Franklin Burroughs lV. Call me Skip. 26 00:03:24,060 --> 00:03:26,210 - Hi, Skip. - I'll give you a hand with it. 27 00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:32,130 What the hell you got in here? A dead body? 28 00:03:32,260 --> 00:03:34,490 I got my books, my clothes, that kinda thing. 29 00:03:34,620 --> 00:03:38,370 Last year we had a guy smuggled his girlfriend up here in one of these. 30 00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:40,410 - Yeah? - He lost the key. 31 00:03:40,540 --> 00:03:42,970 By the time he found it, she was dead. 32 00:03:43,660 --> 00:03:44,730 Really? 33 00:03:44,860 --> 00:03:46,370 - Just kidding. - Oh! 34 00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:49,540 - Welcome to Vernon Academy. - Good one. 35 00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:52,090 This is your side of the room. 36 00:03:52,220 --> 00:03:54,730 You only have to wear this rag on duty days. 37 00:03:55,140 --> 00:03:59,420 - Nobody said anything. I thought we... - Make yourself at home. 38 00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:02,610 So, where are you from? Where'd you go to school? 39 00:04:02,740 --> 00:04:07,020 Well... I grew up in Pittsburgh, went to public school there for about... 40 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:09,180 Holy shit, we're late! 41 00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:10,860 Late? 42 00:04:11,860 --> 00:04:14,450 Mm, how about these? Great, huh? 43 00:04:14,580 --> 00:04:17,380 You know, these assholes, they all go to Neiman Marcus, 44 00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:21,330 but I found this outrageous boutique, Henri's. lt's great stuff, huh? 45 00:04:21,460 --> 00:04:22,050 Yeah. 46 00:04:22,180 --> 00:04:25,330 You know, if these things don't win first prize, there is no God! 47 00:04:25,460 --> 00:04:27,970 - Well, hurry up and change. - Change? 48 00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:32,650 Jeez, I forgot. You've never been to prep school. 49 00:04:32,780 --> 00:04:33,970 Uh-uh. 50 00:04:34,100 --> 00:04:36,140 You must think I'm pretty weird, huh? 51 00:04:36,260 --> 00:04:39,170 - Well... - Look, look, this is a Vernon tradition. 52 00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:43,610 Every year, the seniors have to parade around wearing women's underwear. 53 00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:47,940 lt's supposed to teach us humility. The seniors give the squits shit all year long, 54 00:04:48,060 --> 00:04:50,890 and this is their one chance to laugh at us. 55 00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:54,690 Oh! I get it. 56 00:04:54,820 --> 00:04:57,290 - You thought... - Yeah. 57 00:04:57,420 --> 00:05:00,380 Come on, this is a tradition. Jeez, what are you gonna do? 58 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,490 - Oh, no, I'll just stay here and unpack. - Let me think. 59 00:05:03,620 --> 00:05:06,290 - Jenny! - Jenny? Hey. Hey. 60 00:05:06,980 --> 00:05:10,130 Let's see. Ah! We're in luck! 61 00:05:10,700 --> 00:05:13,660 - Mementoes. - I don't wanna dress up in women's... 62 00:05:13,780 --> 00:05:16,530 - You're not gettin' mine. - I don't want yours. 63 00:05:16,660 --> 00:05:20,650 Granted, you won't win any prizes, but at least you won't be embarrassed. 64 00:05:20,780 --> 00:05:22,740 Get changed. 65 00:05:26,420 --> 00:05:28,140 Come on. 66 00:05:28,260 --> 00:05:29,380 - Come on. - I can't! 67 00:05:29,500 --> 00:05:31,460 Come on! 68 00:05:33,820 --> 00:05:37,020 Would you hurry up, man! We gotta go! We're late! 69 00:05:37,780 --> 00:05:40,140 Come on. You look great. Let's go. 70 00:05:41,660 --> 00:05:44,250 - Hey, guys! - Look at her! 71 00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:49,370 - Skip?! Skip?! - You look great! You look great! 72 00:05:51,620 --> 00:05:54,010 Nice ass you got there, babe! 73 00:05:54,140 --> 00:05:57,180 Ooh, black! My favourite colour! 74 00:06:06,780 --> 00:06:08,930 They love you! 75 00:06:11,260 --> 00:06:14,010 Hey, turn around. Oh, look at those tits! 76 00:06:15,620 --> 00:06:18,850 Show your tits! Show your tits! 77 00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:22,810 Hey, where'd you get that outfit? 78 00:06:23,620 --> 00:06:25,770 lt's Frank-N-Furter! 79 00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,570 - Whoa! - Gotcha! 80 00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:33,380 - Hey, you've really fallen for him! - I'm gettin' a gigantic soft-on! 81 00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:36,460 lt's the weenie in the bikini! 82 00:06:42,820 --> 00:06:44,380 Shit! 83 00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:50,010 We want more! We want more! 84 00:06:58,060 --> 00:07:01,810 l'm sorry. I'm sorry, I know it was a lousy thing to do. 85 00:07:01,940 --> 00:07:04,090 Look, don't take it personally. 86 00:07:05,500 --> 00:07:08,570 lt really is a tradition. Somebody falls for it every year. 87 00:07:08,940 --> 00:07:13,650 No hard feelings, OK? Look, it was just a prank. Don't take it personally. 88 00:07:14,060 --> 00:07:15,890 OK? 89 00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:20,380 We're roommates. We're gonna be together for a whole year. Truce? 90 00:07:22,300 --> 00:07:23,860 Truce. 91 00:07:35,460 --> 00:07:38,660 There she is again. I think I'm in love with you. 92 00:07:38,780 --> 00:07:40,820 - Hey, sweetheart. - Yeah. 93 00:07:40,940 --> 00:07:45,140 - Hello, miss, is your dance card filled? - I think she's in the wrong john. 94 00:07:46,340 --> 00:07:50,300 - Lights! - Fuck you, Roscoe! 95 00:07:50,420 --> 00:07:52,730 I said lights, nipple nose! 96 00:07:52,860 --> 00:07:55,250 That's Mr Nipple Nose to you, Maybaum! 97 00:07:55,380 --> 00:07:58,050 Shh! Quiet, here comes the walrus man. 98 00:08:04,620 --> 00:08:07,770 - Good evening, Mr Maybaum. - Good evening, sir. 99 00:08:08,540 --> 00:08:10,970 - All present and accounted for. - Hmm. 100 00:08:13,180 --> 00:08:16,860 - Well, good night, then, Mr Maybaum. - Good night, sir. 101 00:08:25,820 --> 00:08:30,370 One more thing. If you have any trouble with the boys smoking, let me know. 102 00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:32,460 OK? 103 00:08:33,660 --> 00:08:35,620 Good night. 104 00:08:41,860 --> 00:08:45,010 105 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:07,940 Hey, there he is. 106 00:09:09,300 --> 00:09:12,260 Hey, look, there's the geek in the lingerie. 107 00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:14,980 lt's the guy in the woman's underwear! 108 00:09:15,100 --> 00:09:17,570 Ladies and gentlemen, the lovely April Pussy. 109 00:09:17,700 --> 00:09:19,770 Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Vernon. 110 00:09:20,940 --> 00:09:24,220 - Hi, darling! - Hey, Jonathon, over here! 111 00:09:28,220 --> 00:09:32,130 Let me take you away from all this, my darling! 112 00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:36,490 - He cries real tears. - Come here. Sit here. 113 00:09:37,900 --> 00:09:40,260 Oh, let me wipe those tears! 114 00:09:42,140 --> 00:09:45,290 - Oh, God, what a tool. - We're talkin' megadork. 115 00:09:45,420 --> 00:09:46,980 Shut up! 116 00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:51,540 - What is going on over there? - They pulled the underwear gag on him. 117 00:09:53,780 --> 00:09:56,140 - - 118 00:09:58,260 --> 00:10:01,330 - Going to change into your bra? - Don't forget to write! 119 00:10:01,460 --> 00:10:04,100 l'm tellin' you, that guy's a wimp. 120 00:10:09,060 --> 00:10:12,100 Hey, look, Jonathon, I think you've been ma... 121 00:10:12,940 --> 00:10:14,900 Oh, my God. 122 00:10:17,980 --> 00:10:19,620 Jesus! 123 00:10:19,740 --> 00:10:21,300 Jesus! 124 00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:28,340 I dunno why he'd do it! Jesus, I dunno why he did it, it was just a joke! 125 00:10:29,540 --> 00:10:31,450 Hung himself! 126 00:10:32,060 --> 00:10:34,810 I dunno why he did it, but it's my fault... 127 00:10:36,180 --> 00:10:37,900 128 00:10:45,380 --> 00:10:47,370 ls this meant to amuse me, Mr Burroughs? 129 00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:48,770 Quiet! 130 00:10:48,900 --> 00:10:51,570 Stop by my office about eight in the morning. 131 00:10:51,700 --> 00:10:56,980 You think about what you've done, and I'll think about what I'm going to do. 132 00:10:58,420 --> 00:11:02,130 Oh, and, um... please invite your dead roommate. 133 00:11:02,260 --> 00:11:04,620 All right, show's over. 134 00:11:11,620 --> 00:11:13,180 135 00:11:25,820 --> 00:11:31,500 l'm sorry. lt was a lousy thing to do. But l was so humiliated I just had to kill myself. 136 00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:38,500 Oh, just a prank, just a prank. No hard feelings, huh? Truce. 137 00:11:41,860 --> 00:11:43,420 Truce. 138 00:11:46,140 --> 00:11:50,850 l'm not really ready for this conversation. I usually have at least a month 139 00:11:50,980 --> 00:11:53,940 before I am faced with students in women's underwear, 140 00:11:54,060 --> 00:11:58,530 or an artist's rendering of my persona dangling from the rafters. 141 00:11:58,660 --> 00:12:01,220 We're only in the first week, gentlemen. 142 00:12:01,340 --> 00:12:04,780 lt's frightening to imagine what could happen by Christmas, isn't it? 143 00:12:04,900 --> 00:12:06,460 - Yes, sir. - Yes, sir. 144 00:12:06,580 --> 00:12:11,610 That was rhetorical, boys. I like to give everybody one chance to screw up. 145 00:12:12,500 --> 00:12:15,460 I think we can assume you've each had yours now. 146 00:12:15,580 --> 00:12:20,500 I hope this is the last such conversation l'll have with you until the end of the year. 147 00:12:20,620 --> 00:12:25,380 - No ifs, ands, or buts. Is that clear? - Yes, sir. 148 00:12:27,140 --> 00:12:29,970 - We really gotta watch it. - We've gotta straighten up. 149 00:12:30,100 --> 00:12:33,490 - Be responsible. Toe the line. - Gotta clean up our act. Absolutely. 150 00:12:37,540 --> 00:12:40,660 They're never gonna sell it to us. lt's never gonna work. 151 00:12:40,780 --> 00:12:43,340 - We're gonna get busted. - Shh. Relax. 152 00:12:50,420 --> 00:12:53,540 Which one of you youngsters is planning to buy this? 153 00:12:53,660 --> 00:12:56,410 - I am. - Oh, really? How old are you, son? 154 00:12:57,100 --> 00:12:59,140 50. 155 00:13:06,540 --> 00:13:08,610 You did it! 156 00:13:08,740 --> 00:13:12,020 l'm astounded by your brilliance and the magnitude of your gall. 157 00:13:12,140 --> 00:13:14,290 Yeah, so am I. 158 00:13:21,260 --> 00:13:23,620 This is something I've never told anyone, 159 00:13:23,740 --> 00:13:27,530 so you've gotta swear to me what you hear will not leave this room. 160 00:13:27,660 --> 00:13:30,050 Swear to God. 161 00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:32,220 - OK. - Swear to God! 162 00:13:33,020 --> 00:13:34,580 OK. 163 00:13:38,500 --> 00:13:40,730 I killed a guy. 164 00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:42,260 Yeah? 165 00:13:42,380 --> 00:13:44,890 - I mean it, Jonathon. - Me, too. 166 00:13:46,060 --> 00:13:50,660 Last year, uh, I was in Montego Bay with some friends. 167 00:13:51,780 --> 00:13:54,420 And we were all in this bar. 168 00:13:54,540 --> 00:13:57,530 And I met this gorgeous girl. She takes me back to her place, 169 00:13:57,660 --> 00:14:00,050 and then some huge guy had a gun to my head. 170 00:14:00,380 --> 00:14:02,970 And my gorgeous gal, she's going through my pockets. 171 00:14:03,100 --> 00:14:05,740 I must've been drunk, cos I kicked the guy in the balls. 172 00:14:05,860 --> 00:14:10,810 And I went for the gun, and then the next thing I know, there's this huge explosion. 173 00:14:10,940 --> 00:14:12,900 And, uh... 174 00:14:15,180 --> 00:14:19,460 the guy was... lyin' on the ground 175 00:14:19,580 --> 00:14:22,330 with blood pourin' out of a hole in his head. 176 00:14:28,140 --> 00:14:30,890 - lt was horrible. - Jesus. 177 00:14:34,820 --> 00:14:36,380 God. 178 00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:41,850 - What'd you do? - What do you think? I got the hell out. 179 00:14:46,780 --> 00:14:49,530 What's the worst thing you've ever done? 180 00:14:51,780 --> 00:14:54,610 - I cheated on my SAT. - I can smell bullshit a mile away. 181 00:14:54,740 --> 00:15:00,130 Hey! lt cost me 1 50 bucks. I bought the test. I had every answer goin' in. 182 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:05,850 You cheated on the SAT? You cheated on the SAT?! 183 00:15:05,980 --> 00:15:07,330 Yeah. 184 00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:11,810 Christ, I love that! You're the smartest fuckin' guy in the whole school. 185 00:15:12,180 --> 00:15:15,460 Mr Scholarship. I mean, even Roger did OK on the SAT. 186 00:15:15,860 --> 00:15:20,010 lt just so happens my whole life depends on my getting into Harvard. 187 00:15:20,140 --> 00:15:22,500 You really cheated on the SAT! 188 00:15:24,420 --> 00:15:26,570 lt's pretty serious. 189 00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:29,780 Hey, you killed a guy. 190 00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:34,780 Well... not exactly. 191 00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,770 What do you mean, ''not exactly''? 192 00:15:39,900 --> 00:15:41,460 Huh? 193 00:15:46,700 --> 00:15:49,980 That son of a bitch got away with everything I had. 194 00:15:50,100 --> 00:15:53,060 You know, I was so scared that I shit my pants. 195 00:16:05,860 --> 00:16:06,850 What an asshole. 196 00:16:06,980 --> 00:16:09,860 Oh, no, Kafka's symbolism here is obvious. 197 00:16:09,980 --> 00:16:12,650 The apple represents original sin. Yeah. 198 00:16:12,780 --> 00:16:16,820 lt sticks in his side like Christ's wound and eventually festers and destroys him. 199 00:16:16,940 --> 00:16:21,380 No, no, no. What he's really saying is we're all cockroaches. 200 00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,890 - Later. - Hey, guess what you're doin' tonight. 201 00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:25,690 - Latin. - Wrong. 202 00:16:25,820 --> 00:16:29,970 You've got a date with the second-prettiest girl in Foxfield. 203 00:16:30,980 --> 00:16:32,940 - You didn't. - Oh, I did. I did. 204 00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:36,500 - I am not gonna be able to do this. - We are not gonna get caught. 205 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:39,770 l'm not talkin' about that. l'm talkin' about the girls. 206 00:16:39,900 --> 00:16:44,130 - I've never done it before. - You've never done that before? 207 00:16:46,140 --> 00:16:49,100 Sure, I've done it. God! Lots of times. 208 00:16:49,220 --> 00:16:52,610 I mean, you know, not all the way every time, but... 209 00:16:53,900 --> 00:16:55,860 I feel sick. 210 00:16:56,900 --> 00:17:00,210 You've got nothin' to worry about. These are very nice girls. 211 00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:02,700 I might not even get laid tonight. 212 00:17:05,140 --> 00:17:08,500 Although that's highly unlikely. Turn off the light. 213 00:17:09,660 --> 00:17:13,620 We're gonna get caught. You know what they're gonna do if they catch us? 214 00:17:13,740 --> 00:17:17,860 Sure. But it doesn't hold a candle to what the girls are gonna do. 215 00:17:17,980 --> 00:17:18,650 Oh, God. 216 00:17:21,100 --> 00:17:22,850 217 00:17:24,780 --> 00:17:27,010 Hoo-hoo! Hoo-hoo! 218 00:17:27,140 --> 00:17:29,290 Hoo-hoo! Hoo-hoo! 219 00:17:29,980 --> 00:17:32,650 Hoo-hoo-hoo! Hoo-hoo-hoo! 220 00:17:33,180 --> 00:17:37,890 - Hoo-hoo-hoo! Hoo-hoo-hoo! - Oh, I don't believe this. 221 00:17:38,020 --> 00:17:41,220 - - Don't worry. 222 00:17:41,740 --> 00:17:44,020 Here they are. Right on time. 223 00:17:46,180 --> 00:17:48,330 - Hey. - Hi! 224 00:17:48,980 --> 00:17:51,940 225 00:17:53,220 --> 00:17:56,770 They want to work, it's just we haven't given them the opportunities. 226 00:17:56,900 --> 00:17:59,730 Poor people are just like you and me, except with no money. 227 00:17:59,860 --> 00:18:03,220 They have so many kids, they can't get out from under. 228 00:18:03,340 --> 00:18:06,620 We've been educated. We use birth control. 229 00:18:06,740 --> 00:18:10,780 Nobody gives a damn. Their situation will never change until we do something. 230 00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:11,650 231 00:18:11,780 --> 00:18:14,610 - You don't agree? - No. No, l, uh... 232 00:18:18,060 --> 00:18:20,210 Jesus! Jesus! 233 00:18:20,340 --> 00:18:23,940 Jesus Christ, Jonathon, I don't believe it! Oh, God! 234 00:18:24,060 --> 00:18:27,020 lt's the grossest thing I ever saw! lt's on my skirt! 235 00:18:41,780 --> 00:18:45,530 You know, deep down inside, I really think they liked me. 236 00:18:50,220 --> 00:18:51,780 Jonathon! 237 00:18:53,740 --> 00:18:57,050 - Guess what I just did for you. - I don't wanna know. 238 00:18:57,180 --> 00:18:59,140 Welcome aboard, Mr Secretary. 239 00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:04,140 Secretary of the Dance Committee is bullshit. lt's an excuse to get outta class. 240 00:19:04,300 --> 00:19:08,370 That's only one of its positive aspects. The best part is there's five of us, 241 00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:10,620 and 479 of them. 242 00:19:11,300 --> 00:19:13,260 Let's get 'em. 243 00:19:24,940 --> 00:19:29,330 - Oh-ho, look at the chest on her. - Oh, the little girls. 244 00:19:29,780 --> 00:19:31,500 - Chicks. - Love 'em. 245 00:19:31,620 --> 00:19:33,180 Whoo! 246 00:19:34,460 --> 00:19:39,140 - Hi. Welcome to Foxfield. - Love the fat girl! Ooh, the big fat one. 247 00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:44,930 This is the way we think it should go. Just before the last dance, 248 00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:49,020 our Mrs DeBreul and your Mr Kennedy will present the prize for best costume. 249 00:19:49,140 --> 00:19:52,770 - Can we just say something? - We think this costume thing is childish. 250 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,370 What?! But it's a Halloween dance! 251 00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:58,170 There are more important things than Halloween. 252 00:19:58,300 --> 00:20:00,450 There are people starving! 253 00:20:00,580 --> 00:20:03,650 Lisa, why don't you offer our guests some sandwiches? 254 00:20:03,780 --> 00:20:07,220 A Halloween dance without any costumes is like every other dance! 255 00:20:07,340 --> 00:20:11,650 I think any dance is inappropriate considering the condition of the world. 256 00:20:11,780 --> 00:20:15,690 I am so tired of you two and your pseudo-intellectual liberal crap! 257 00:20:15,820 --> 00:20:18,460 - Julia! - Your cotton-candy ideas make me sick! 258 00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:19,410 - Lisa! - Hi. 259 00:20:19,540 --> 00:20:21,290 Oh, no! 260 00:20:21,420 --> 00:20:22,330 Agh! 261 00:20:22,460 --> 00:20:24,180 - Lisa! - I'm sorry. 262 00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:26,210 Stay away from me! Oh, fuck! 263 00:20:26,340 --> 00:20:28,700 - Lisa! - Oh, fuck! 264 00:20:28,820 --> 00:20:30,220 You peon! 265 00:20:34,540 --> 00:20:36,370 Oh! Oh! 266 00:20:42,380 --> 00:20:47,060 Let's leave it up to the individual as to whether he or she wears a costume. 267 00:20:49,020 --> 00:20:50,210 What do you think, Jonathon? 268 00:20:50,340 --> 00:20:52,730 l'm terribly sorry, Mrs DeBreul. 269 00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:56,170 Yes, it was most unfortunate. 270 00:20:58,220 --> 00:21:00,810 The vase was a gift from Eleanor Roosevelt? 271 00:21:00,940 --> 00:21:04,690 lrreplaceable. No, I don't think that's being too extreme, not at all. 272 00:21:04,820 --> 00:21:09,180 As a matter of fact, I think you're being quite generous. Goodbye. 273 00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:16,860 Well, Mr Burroughs, you and your dance committee 274 00:21:16,980 --> 00:21:20,810 have really made an indelible impression on our sister school. 275 00:21:21,460 --> 00:21:23,420 And especially you, Mr Ogner. 276 00:21:23,780 --> 00:21:27,220 Not only are you forbidden to attend the Halloween dance, 277 00:21:27,340 --> 00:21:30,940 but you are the first student in the history of Vernon Academy 278 00:21:31,060 --> 00:21:37,300 ever to be banned from Foxfield until, and I quote, ''the day you die''. 279 00:21:37,420 --> 00:21:39,570 On your way, gentlemen. 280 00:21:47,340 --> 00:21:49,330 The white zone is for unloading... 281 00:21:49,460 --> 00:21:51,820 Banished from Foxfield for ever! 282 00:21:52,980 --> 00:21:55,650 The only females within 100 miles. 283 00:21:56,780 --> 00:22:00,930 - Guess you're gonna die a virgin, buddy! - Give me some of that. 284 00:22:01,940 --> 00:22:05,460 - Here you go, pal, Mr Alligator. - You wanna buy a shirt? 285 00:22:05,580 --> 00:22:07,730 286 00:22:10,620 --> 00:22:12,180 Ta-da! 287 00:22:16,060 --> 00:22:18,420 You look troubled, my son. 288 00:22:28,740 --> 00:22:33,810 Worriest thou not about being banished for ever from the Foxfield school for girls, 289 00:22:33,940 --> 00:22:37,410 for yea, though they are the only females within 100 miles, 290 00:22:37,540 --> 00:22:40,450 there is still a place where thou canst journey to. 291 00:22:40,580 --> 00:22:42,570 Chicago, on the nine o'clock bus. 292 00:22:43,020 --> 00:22:45,580 - Forget it. - Desperate circumstances 293 00:22:45,700 --> 00:22:49,220 require desperate measures. Sexually, you're finished around here. 294 00:22:49,340 --> 00:22:52,220 - Must you rub it in? - Look, take this ticket. 295 00:22:52,340 --> 00:22:56,860 Go to Rush Street, the Free N Easy Club. And you will meet the girl of your dreams. 296 00:22:56,980 --> 00:23:01,530 lf she ain't there, take what you can get. Grab a cab, take her to Grey's Lake lnn. 297 00:23:01,660 --> 00:23:05,340 And there you will plant your seed in the Garden of Eden. 298 00:23:07,900 --> 00:23:10,050 - Here's 100 bucks. - Forget it. 299 00:23:10,180 --> 00:23:13,490 Jonathon! Until you get laid, none of us are safe! 300 00:23:15,940 --> 00:23:19,540 And whatever you do, Jesus, don't tell her you're in high school. 301 00:23:19,660 --> 00:23:21,940 - Tell her you're a longshoreman. - What? 302 00:23:22,060 --> 00:23:25,970 - Say you're a theatre critic for the Times. - Yeah. That's better. 303 00:23:26,100 --> 00:23:29,730 You're going. I don't want to see your ass back here until you succeed. 304 00:23:29,860 --> 00:23:33,650 ln fact, I'm not gonna let you in the room until you bring me... her panties. 305 00:23:33,780 --> 00:23:35,980 Oh, come on. Look, Skip, I'm not like you. 306 00:23:36,100 --> 00:23:38,930 I don't have your charm, your finesse, your, uh... 307 00:23:39,060 --> 00:23:42,130 - Class. - Whatever. I'm no good with women. 308 00:23:42,740 --> 00:23:46,180 I know that, you know that. The broads that go to the Free N Easy don't. 309 00:23:46,300 --> 00:23:49,660 Look, Jonathon, you're a great guy. 310 00:23:50,060 --> 00:23:54,340 You've got a lot going for you. Hey, I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it. 311 00:23:54,460 --> 00:23:57,580 Well, I might say it if I didn't mean it, but probably not to you. 312 00:23:57,700 --> 00:23:59,660 Come on, let's go! 313 00:24:00,820 --> 00:24:02,780 314 00:24:03,380 --> 00:24:05,740 l'd lend you some money, but I'm a little short. 315 00:24:05,860 --> 00:24:09,540 Get this one for the Gipper. Come on, you guys, let's go! 316 00:24:12,700 --> 00:24:14,500 - Bless you. - Yeah, bless you. 317 00:24:14,620 --> 00:24:18,300 To the Promised Land, my son. To the Promised Land. 318 00:24:21,460 --> 00:24:25,420 Hey, Jesus, I got a great deal on some alligator shoes, buddy. 319 00:25:23,780 --> 00:25:26,740 320 00:25:29,660 --> 00:25:34,020 You can't deny it, you're only hiding from love 321 00:25:38,780 --> 00:25:40,340 Bartender! 322 00:25:41,060 --> 00:25:42,620 Sir! 323 00:25:43,140 --> 00:25:47,290 You say you're shy, but you're only hiding from love 324 00:26:07,020 --> 00:26:09,010 - Watch it! - Sorry. 325 00:26:10,060 --> 00:26:14,500 You're not deciding, you're only hiding from love 326 00:26:17,140 --> 00:26:20,290 Hi. My name is Jonathon. What's yours? 327 00:26:21,700 --> 00:26:25,450 Mind if I join you? So, do you live around here? 328 00:26:30,220 --> 00:26:34,500 You say that you're shy, but you're only hiding from love 329 00:26:39,500 --> 00:26:41,650 Maybe another time. 330 00:26:48,140 --> 00:26:49,890 Oh, man! 331 00:26:50,020 --> 00:26:53,540 - Bartender! - Hold your horses! Be right with you. 332 00:27:00,220 --> 00:27:01,340 - Go! - Go! 333 00:27:01,460 --> 00:27:04,930 One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six... 334 00:27:05,700 --> 00:27:08,090 - Oh, man! - How did I do? 335 00:27:08,220 --> 00:27:11,260 - I could do better than that. - Oh, she could do better than that! 336 00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:13,660 Ten bucks. Ten bucks. Ten bucks. 337 00:27:15,780 --> 00:27:18,530 - Hey, you're gonna lose some money! - Ellen! 338 00:27:19,420 --> 00:27:22,570 - Ready for takeoff now? - Ready. Wait, wait, wait. 339 00:27:22,700 --> 00:27:24,180 Get ready, get set, go! 340 00:27:24,300 --> 00:27:29,820 One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight! Nine! Ten! 341 00:27:33,140 --> 00:27:35,100 Pay up. 342 00:27:38,340 --> 00:27:40,300 Drinks for the losers. 343 00:27:49,940 --> 00:27:51,900 Nice little profit. 344 00:27:53,860 --> 00:27:56,220 - This one's on the house. - Thanks. 345 00:28:06,020 --> 00:28:07,980 Are you here alone? 346 00:28:08,540 --> 00:28:10,820 - Huh? - Are you here alone? 347 00:28:10,940 --> 00:28:11,980 Yeah. 348 00:28:12,100 --> 00:28:15,700 You know, I get a really good feeling from you. 349 00:28:15,820 --> 00:28:18,180 - You do? - Mm-hm. Gimme your hand. 350 00:28:22,100 --> 00:28:24,090 You got a very exciting aura. 351 00:28:24,940 --> 00:28:26,980 I bet you hear that all the time. 352 00:28:27,100 --> 00:28:29,460 Well... now and again. 353 00:28:29,580 --> 00:28:32,050 - Let me test it. - What? 354 00:28:32,180 --> 00:28:35,460 Your aura. Take this quarter. Close your eyes. 355 00:28:36,940 --> 00:28:40,410 See if you can run the quarter from your forehead to your chin, 356 00:28:40,540 --> 00:28:42,050 and then from ear to ear, 357 00:28:42,180 --> 00:28:45,330 but without ever losing contact with your skin. 358 00:28:45,460 --> 00:28:48,900 - That's it? - lt'll tell us everything we need to know. 359 00:29:07,060 --> 00:29:09,180 Can I have my...? Yes. Thanks. 360 00:29:11,620 --> 00:29:13,820 How'd I do? 361 00:29:13,940 --> 00:29:17,140 l'm sorry. I guess the vibes just weren't right. 362 00:29:29,900 --> 00:29:32,180 Wow. Look, you got two fours! 363 00:29:41,580 --> 00:29:43,650 Excuse me. 364 00:29:45,660 --> 00:29:48,490 - Could I... show you something? - Sure. 365 00:29:55,620 --> 00:29:57,740 Oh, God! 366 00:29:57,860 --> 00:30:01,610 - Why am I such a turd? - lt could happen to anyone here. 367 00:30:02,660 --> 00:30:06,780 - Vodka tonic, please. - Only a dick would fall for that. 368 00:30:06,900 --> 00:30:09,020 Well, you might be right. 369 00:30:12,940 --> 00:30:14,900 Yeah, I should... 370 00:30:19,420 --> 00:30:21,170 Uh... thanks. 371 00:30:23,300 --> 00:30:24,860 lf you'll excuse me... 372 00:30:24,980 --> 00:30:29,580 l'm gonna find a very tall building with a fabulous view, and jump off. 373 00:30:36,260 --> 00:30:38,540 Trailways bus terminal, please. 374 00:30:44,780 --> 00:30:46,930 I know just the tall building. 375 00:30:56,340 --> 00:30:57,690 Whoo! 376 00:31:08,340 --> 00:31:11,570 - Why don't you come back over here? - Why don't you come over here? 377 00:31:11,700 --> 00:31:15,770 - No, I'm... I'm comfortable right here. - What are you afraid of? 378 00:31:16,220 --> 00:31:18,180 Uh... dying. 379 00:31:20,100 --> 00:31:24,250 Uh, look, I wanna be totally honest here. You're scarin' the hell outta me. 380 00:31:25,620 --> 00:31:30,380 Hey, I just thought of somethin'. I haven't eaten. What about you? Are you hungry? 381 00:31:30,500 --> 00:31:33,890 What do you say? I could... I could buy us dinner. 382 00:31:37,860 --> 00:31:40,090 Now I am gonna jump. 383 00:31:40,220 --> 00:31:43,580 - lt's only money. - Yeah, well, it's my only money. 384 00:31:45,620 --> 00:31:49,060 Have you ever... have you ever been in love? 385 00:31:49,420 --> 00:31:52,970 - Yeah, I was pretty fond of that $100 bill. - Have you? 386 00:31:58,460 --> 00:32:00,660 You're askin' me, the turd? 387 00:32:00,780 --> 00:32:04,460 Well, you look like a pretty... sensitive turd to me. 388 00:32:06,660 --> 00:32:09,780 Do you think there's something wrong with me? 389 00:32:13,780 --> 00:32:16,740 Well, how do I know? I mean, I don't know you. 390 00:32:17,620 --> 00:32:19,580 We can fix that. 391 00:32:22,820 --> 00:32:27,530 Yeah, are you hungry? Cos I am pretty hungry. You could buy us dinner. 392 00:32:27,660 --> 00:32:29,810 OK, so what do you wanna eat? 393 00:32:31,700 --> 00:32:32,970 Um... 394 00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:35,330 do you like ltalian? 395 00:32:35,460 --> 00:32:36,210 Uh... 396 00:32:36,340 --> 00:32:37,900 Chinese? 397 00:32:57,300 --> 00:32:58,650 Uh... 398 00:32:59,500 --> 00:33:02,220 - This is an elevator. - Really? 399 00:33:02,340 --> 00:33:04,300 I love elevators. 400 00:33:04,940 --> 00:33:07,220 I think they're just wonderful. 401 00:33:08,300 --> 00:33:11,260 I love the way they go up and down. 402 00:33:13,820 --> 00:33:16,490 - Do you? - Oh, yeah, I think it's great. 403 00:33:19,780 --> 00:33:21,740 Which do you prefer? 404 00:33:23,020 --> 00:33:24,980 Going up... 405 00:33:26,460 --> 00:33:28,420 or going down? 406 00:33:29,140 --> 00:33:30,700 Um... 407 00:33:31,380 --> 00:33:33,660 - Up is fine. - Really? 408 00:33:35,060 --> 00:33:37,570 I think going down is much more exciting. 409 00:33:38,460 --> 00:33:41,900 Well, yeah, now that you mention it, down is, uh... 410 00:33:43,420 --> 00:33:47,020 Of course, going up... can be... a thrill. 411 00:33:47,820 --> 00:33:49,380 lt depends. 412 00:33:50,780 --> 00:33:52,690 That's what I think. 413 00:33:56,220 --> 00:33:58,050 Wait. 414 00:33:58,180 --> 00:34:00,850 Yeah, up is... Down is... 415 00:34:11,140 --> 00:34:14,850 - Wait, uh... Wait, where...? Where's the...? - 416 00:34:14,980 --> 00:34:17,130 No, at the back. At the back. 417 00:34:17,460 --> 00:34:19,100 Oh, yeah. 418 00:34:33,260 --> 00:34:35,410 - Oh, God! - Oh, God, I'm so hot. 419 00:34:38,500 --> 00:34:42,020 Wouldn't you prefer... doing this... lying down? 420 00:34:42,140 --> 00:34:44,290 Uh... yeah, sure. Whatever. 421 00:34:46,420 --> 00:34:49,060 Or maybe... you prefer doing it standing up. 422 00:34:49,380 --> 00:34:51,130 Um... 423 00:34:51,260 --> 00:34:53,620 Um... I think I better lie down. 424 00:35:09,700 --> 00:35:12,130 Look, just... just slow down. Just slow down. 425 00:35:12,260 --> 00:35:14,220 - OK. - Kiss me. 426 00:35:16,020 --> 00:35:17,980 Jonathon... Stop, my hair's stuck. 427 00:35:18,100 --> 00:35:21,300 - Oh. Sorry. OK. - That's better. That's better. 428 00:35:23,060 --> 00:35:26,340 - Oh, what's...? Wait a minute. The sheet. - Oh. Sorry. OK. 429 00:35:27,900 --> 00:35:30,410 - How are you doing? - Oh, good! Good! 430 00:35:31,300 --> 00:35:32,260 Aren't I? 431 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:34,850 Maybe something's happened to him. 432 00:35:34,980 --> 00:35:39,020 - I thought he'd be back by Friday. - I can't keep covering for him. 433 00:35:39,140 --> 00:35:40,730 - Where is he? - How should I know? 434 00:35:40,860 --> 00:35:43,220 You sent the little douche bag to Rush Street! 435 00:35:43,340 --> 00:35:46,060 - Oh, shut up, you clone. - Up your tube, geek. 436 00:35:46,180 --> 00:35:48,740 - I'm telling Kennedy. - Very honourable, Skip. 437 00:35:48,860 --> 00:35:50,850 lt's been nice knowin' ya. 438 00:35:51,380 --> 00:35:53,500 Where the hell have you been? 439 00:35:59,140 --> 00:36:01,290 - - 440 00:36:05,540 --> 00:36:07,900 Very impressive, Mr Ogner. 441 00:36:09,020 --> 00:36:11,450 - In a fucking elevator? - That was the first time. 442 00:36:12,220 --> 00:36:14,130 I can't stand it! 443 00:36:14,260 --> 00:36:18,380 Oh, it was stuck... between the 51st and 52nd floor. 444 00:36:20,620 --> 00:36:22,900 - How old is she? - Oh, God... 445 00:36:24,020 --> 00:36:25,980 mid-thirties. 446 00:36:26,980 --> 00:36:29,410 Oh, God. God! 447 00:36:30,860 --> 00:36:33,610 A fucking elevator! Fucking ele... Whoa! 448 00:36:34,820 --> 00:36:38,100 Now let's each of us take a moment to look within ourselves, 449 00:36:38,220 --> 00:36:40,690 and ask for guidance... 450 00:36:40,820 --> 00:36:42,780 and strength. 451 00:36:43,940 --> 00:36:45,900 - Our heavenly Father... - How big? 452 00:36:46,220 --> 00:36:49,290 ..may you look down on each and every one of us 453 00:36:49,420 --> 00:36:51,780 and give us the will, 454 00:36:51,900 --> 00:36:55,260 the purity of mind, to follow your way. 455 00:36:55,380 --> 00:36:58,530 - What's her name? - Ellen. 456 00:36:58,660 --> 00:37:02,940 She's a fashion designer. Told her l'm at Northwestern workin' on my PhD. 457 00:37:03,060 --> 00:37:05,700 And she bought it? And you really...? 458 00:37:05,820 --> 00:37:07,140 Mm-hm. 459 00:37:07,260 --> 00:37:09,930 - Jesus! And she really...? - Mm-hm. 460 00:37:10,060 --> 00:37:12,260 - Jesus! - Hey, you wanna be careful? 461 00:37:12,380 --> 00:37:13,780 Aw, man. 462 00:37:21,460 --> 00:37:23,420 Hey! There he is! 463 00:37:24,260 --> 00:37:26,980 - Mr Porno! - Yeah, the Rush Street Casanova! 464 00:37:27,340 --> 00:37:30,650 - Hey, he's a sex machine. - The guy is an animal. 465 00:37:31,180 --> 00:37:35,090 lt's Dick Man! Able to leap long fences at a single bound! 466 00:37:35,220 --> 00:37:37,450 Yes, Dick Man! 467 00:37:38,660 --> 00:37:40,620 Oh, you lady-killer! 468 00:38:02,340 --> 00:38:04,570 OK. See ya Monday. 469 00:38:04,700 --> 00:38:07,610 Wait a minute, wait a minute. Listen to this. 470 00:38:07,940 --> 00:38:13,220 ''One out of every two males experiences impotence at least once in his late teens.'' 471 00:38:13,340 --> 00:38:15,490 One out of two. Holy shit. 472 00:38:16,540 --> 00:38:19,610 Well, have a swell weekend. Give Ellen my love. 473 00:38:19,740 --> 00:38:21,380 Oh! 474 00:38:21,500 --> 00:38:23,060 Oh! 475 00:38:53,380 --> 00:38:55,100 Oh, Jonathon. 476 00:38:55,220 --> 00:38:57,180 Mm. 477 00:39:23,060 --> 00:39:27,130 Let's do it again. What do you think? Hm? What do you think? 478 00:40:42,380 --> 00:40:44,740 - Are you ready? - Mm-hm. 479 00:40:49,980 --> 00:40:52,340 lt's called an instant margarita. 480 00:40:53,060 --> 00:40:55,340 - Ready when you are. - Open. 481 00:41:00,540 --> 00:41:02,100 Swallow. 482 00:41:02,540 --> 00:41:04,100 Swallow! 483 00:41:05,260 --> 00:41:08,140 Do you want some water? Do you want some water? Open. 484 00:41:08,260 --> 00:41:10,570 - Do you want more? - Cut it out! 485 00:41:10,700 --> 00:41:13,660 - Just tryin' to help! - You're dealin' with an animal here. 486 00:41:13,780 --> 00:41:16,210 - Oh, my. - All right, no more Mr Nice Guy. 487 00:41:16,340 --> 00:41:18,330 - Oh, my God. - What? 488 00:41:19,380 --> 00:41:23,170 That's it! You wanna play rough? Huh? You wanna play rough? 489 00:41:37,140 --> 00:41:39,100 I love you. 490 00:41:45,900 --> 00:41:49,260 A lot of people ruin a good thing with pressure and strings. 491 00:41:49,380 --> 00:41:51,260 They suffocate each other. 492 00:41:51,380 --> 00:41:55,340 I don't want that kind of relationship. I don't think you do, either. 493 00:41:55,460 --> 00:41:58,180 You know, Ellen, when I said I loved you, 494 00:41:59,340 --> 00:42:02,730 I didn't mean for you to get the impression that I actually love you. 495 00:42:03,060 --> 00:42:06,340 lt's a cliche one falls back on in this situation. 496 00:42:08,220 --> 00:42:11,290 What I was trying to say is, I very much like you, 497 00:42:11,420 --> 00:42:14,650 but we shouldn't exaggerate the significance of that. 498 00:42:14,780 --> 00:42:17,370 lt's... We have a good time together. 499 00:42:21,020 --> 00:42:23,690 Next weekend, why don't I come up? 500 00:42:23,820 --> 00:42:26,570 - Up? - Yeah. To Northwestern. 501 00:42:29,660 --> 00:42:31,810 We'll stay at your place. 502 00:42:32,700 --> 00:42:34,850 My place? At Northwestern? 503 00:42:35,700 --> 00:42:40,010 Yeah, great. That's a great idea. When do you wanna come up? 504 00:42:40,140 --> 00:42:41,970 Next weekend. 505 00:42:42,100 --> 00:42:44,610 Uh, yeah, next weekend I won't be there. 506 00:42:44,740 --> 00:42:46,890 l'll be, uh... I'll be in the city. 507 00:42:47,660 --> 00:42:50,410 - Oh. Chicago? - Yeah. No! No, New York. 508 00:42:50,540 --> 00:42:52,690 I have to attend a seminar. 509 00:42:53,820 --> 00:42:57,730 Well, that's even better. We'll have a great time. 510 00:42:58,500 --> 00:43:02,620 - In New York? - We'll do the romantic bullshit routine. 511 00:43:02,740 --> 00:43:05,940 We'll have a great time. ln New York. 512 00:43:14,420 --> 00:43:16,140 - Wake up, limp dick! - 513 00:43:16,260 --> 00:43:20,730 Oh, rise and shine. Come on, you're gonna be late for chapel. 514 00:43:20,860 --> 00:43:23,850 - Let's go! - I'm going, I'm going, I'm going. 515 00:43:23,980 --> 00:43:25,380 Jesus! 516 00:43:25,500 --> 00:43:26,850 What? 517 00:43:26,980 --> 00:43:28,940 You look horrible. 518 00:43:30,980 --> 00:43:33,130 Oh, I don't believe it. 519 00:43:33,260 --> 00:43:35,300 What now? 520 00:43:35,420 --> 00:43:37,540 New York. 521 00:43:37,660 --> 00:43:39,650 I told her I'd meet her in New York. 522 00:43:39,780 --> 00:43:44,060 ln New York? Jesus, you're... What, do you love this chick? Huh? 523 00:43:45,060 --> 00:43:49,020 Does she know you love her? No, really, does she know you love her? 524 00:43:49,140 --> 00:43:52,130 Does she know you've gone completely off the deep end? 525 00:43:52,260 --> 00:43:55,460 All's I know is, I gotta find a seminar in New York. 526 00:44:43,620 --> 00:44:45,740 What are we doing? 527 00:44:46,380 --> 00:44:50,420 - Getting rid of that eyesore. - I happen to like this eyesore. 528 00:44:52,300 --> 00:44:53,530 529 00:44:53,660 --> 00:44:57,700 - May I help you? - Could we try this jacket in his size? 530 00:44:59,300 --> 00:45:00,260 39 regular? 531 00:45:00,380 --> 00:45:04,850 We're not getting rid of it entirely, we're just giving it a much-needed rest. 532 00:45:05,460 --> 00:45:07,500 - Sir? - Uh-huh. 533 00:45:07,620 --> 00:45:09,580 - Ma'am. - OK. 534 00:45:11,220 --> 00:45:13,180 All right. 535 00:45:15,180 --> 00:45:17,140 Very nice. 536 00:45:18,220 --> 00:45:21,580 - What do you think? - Very distinguished. 537 00:45:22,340 --> 00:45:24,730 - Now slacks. - Mm-hm. May I suggest, uh... 538 00:45:24,860 --> 00:45:27,500 Grey flannel. 539 00:45:27,620 --> 00:45:28,890 31 . 540 00:45:29,020 --> 00:45:30,850 Uh, 30. 541 00:45:30,980 --> 00:45:36,850 - What are you saying about my trousers? - They speak for themselves. 542 00:45:36,980 --> 00:45:39,540 Sir, you'll find the dressing room right over there. 543 00:45:39,660 --> 00:45:41,650 Thank you. 544 00:46:16,260 --> 00:46:17,820 Ellen? 545 00:46:21,340 --> 00:46:23,300 Shit. Shit! 546 00:46:23,420 --> 00:46:24,740 - Sir. Sir! - 547 00:46:28,660 --> 00:46:30,380 Ellen! Ellen! 548 00:46:30,500 --> 00:46:34,540 - Where do you think you're going? - I have to catch her! Ellen! 549 00:46:38,900 --> 00:46:40,410 Come on. 550 00:46:40,540 --> 00:46:42,500 Come on. 551 00:46:53,140 --> 00:46:54,700 552 00:47:02,340 --> 00:47:04,300 Hiya, tiger. 553 00:47:10,140 --> 00:47:12,260 What am I gonna do? 554 00:47:12,380 --> 00:47:17,140 I don't know her number. I don't know her address. I don't even know her last name. 555 00:47:17,260 --> 00:47:19,410 Knew her pretty well, did you? 556 00:47:22,180 --> 00:47:27,490 l'm sorry. Look, she was bound to find out about it sooner or later. 557 00:47:27,620 --> 00:47:30,740 Yeah. I just wish it was later, you know. 558 00:47:32,780 --> 00:47:34,210 Christ. 559 00:47:36,940 --> 00:47:40,090 Hey! You gonna spend the rest of your life in bed? 560 00:47:42,740 --> 00:47:47,770 Don't you think you're takin' this a little hard? You've gotta go to dinner. 561 00:47:47,940 --> 00:47:50,300 I can't believe you'd forgo eggplant surprise. 562 00:47:50,420 --> 00:47:54,300 - I'm not hungry. - That's no reason not to eat the shit. 563 00:47:54,420 --> 00:47:56,620 Coming or not? Last chance. 564 00:48:03,100 --> 00:48:05,060 One more chance. 565 00:48:11,420 --> 00:48:13,930 This is your final and last chance. 566 00:48:14,820 --> 00:48:17,020 Leave me alone! 567 00:48:17,140 --> 00:48:21,500 l'll leave you alone. You don't wanna do anything. You don't wanna... 568 00:48:23,620 --> 00:48:25,580 What a jerk! 569 00:48:31,300 --> 00:48:33,450 Very well done, Mr Jenkins. 570 00:48:34,780 --> 00:48:37,610 Extraordinarily average, Mr Maybaum. 571 00:48:37,740 --> 00:48:39,890 Very nice, Mr Jackson. 572 00:48:41,980 --> 00:48:44,340 Very perceptive, Mr Burroughs. 573 00:48:46,940 --> 00:48:49,090 Too vague, Mr Goobser. 574 00:48:49,940 --> 00:48:54,460 We have something really mediocre here, Mr Ogner. Let's not keep it up. 575 00:48:55,180 --> 00:48:57,820 Offended all my sensibilities, Mr Ruskin. 576 00:48:59,460 --> 00:49:00,420 577 00:49:00,540 --> 00:49:02,660 Hey, Jonathon, wait up! 578 00:49:03,380 --> 00:49:06,290 A C-plus - now you've got something to be depressed about. 579 00:49:06,420 --> 00:49:09,460 - Even Roger got a B-minus. - I don't give a shit. 580 00:49:12,660 --> 00:49:17,730 What'll you do for Christmas? Crucify yourself? I think you're missing the point. 581 00:49:17,860 --> 00:49:19,130 - Do you? - I do. 582 00:49:19,260 --> 00:49:22,970 She was beautiful. She was wonderful. But a fuck... lt's just a fuck. 583 00:49:23,100 --> 00:49:27,170 - Sometimes you're a real asshole. - You're not the first guy to be dumped on. 584 00:49:27,300 --> 00:49:31,930 One thing I don't need right now is the world according to Skippy here. 585 00:49:32,900 --> 00:49:35,620 Do us both a favour, huh? Just shut up. 586 00:49:36,300 --> 00:49:38,260 OK, Mr Depth. 587 00:49:40,140 --> 00:49:42,180 - Wallow in it. - 588 00:49:46,820 --> 00:49:48,940 - Dammit, Roger, hurry up. - Don't rush me. 589 00:49:49,060 --> 00:49:51,050 We're playing poker. You want me to help? 590 00:49:51,180 --> 00:49:55,300 All right, all right. Does a full house beat a flush or does a flush beat a full house? 591 00:49:55,420 --> 00:49:57,330 You don't even know how to play! 592 00:49:57,460 --> 00:49:59,450 How many times do we have to tell you? 593 00:49:59,580 --> 00:50:03,050 - Come on! Come on! - 594 00:50:03,180 --> 00:50:05,980 - What was that? - 595 00:50:06,100 --> 00:50:09,380 lt's Jonathon. He's really freakin' out. 596 00:50:09,500 --> 00:50:11,060 Oh, great. 597 00:50:11,180 --> 00:50:14,090 - Jonathon's always freakin' out. - We gotta redeal. 598 00:50:14,220 --> 00:50:16,020 - Redeal? - He had to leave. 599 00:50:16,140 --> 00:50:17,540 - So what? - lt's a redeal. 600 00:50:17,660 --> 00:50:22,420 - If it was your cards you wouldn't do it. - After someone leaves... doesn't count. 601 00:50:22,540 --> 00:50:24,930 - Gimme those cards! - lt's a null game. 602 00:50:25,060 --> 00:50:30,580 No way! No way! Get outta here! lf it was your cards, you wouldn't redeal. 603 00:50:36,780 --> 00:50:37,930 Jonathon! 604 00:50:40,060 --> 00:50:42,420 Jesus Christ! Jonathon! 605 00:50:48,860 --> 00:50:50,930 Jonathon! Jonathon! 606 00:51:01,300 --> 00:51:05,660 Jonathon! Come back, goddammit! Jonathon, stop! 607 00:51:12,940 --> 00:51:16,820 Shut up! Shut up! Listen, man, you're gonna get kicked outta here. 608 00:51:16,940 --> 00:51:21,060 You can kiss your fuckin' future goodbye, including Harvard. Do you hear me? 609 00:51:21,180 --> 00:51:23,410 610 00:51:42,340 --> 00:51:44,490 Kicked you out, didn't he? 611 00:51:46,660 --> 00:51:50,890 l, uh... I just can't talk about it right now. 612 00:51:51,020 --> 00:51:55,940 My parents give a shitload of money to this place. Nobody's kickin' you out. 613 00:51:56,060 --> 00:51:58,020 What's done is done. 614 00:52:02,500 --> 00:52:04,460 You dirt clod. 615 00:52:05,620 --> 00:52:09,300 - Harvard accepted you already? - Headmaster Kennedy said, and I quote, 616 00:52:09,420 --> 00:52:13,100 ''Jonathon, you are a credit to us all'', end quote. 617 00:52:13,220 --> 00:52:15,940 - You saved my life, man. - You still owe me a blow job. 618 00:52:16,220 --> 00:52:20,500 - You're right. I forgot all about that. - Jesus, you can't forget these things. 619 00:52:20,620 --> 00:52:23,370 - We're drinkin'. lt's on you. - Yeah, of course. 620 00:52:24,060 --> 00:52:26,130 Ma, we can trim the tree when I get there. 621 00:52:26,260 --> 00:52:29,700 l'm only gonna be gone the first four days. I mean... 622 00:52:30,820 --> 00:52:33,210 Mom, I'll be home for Christmas. 623 00:52:34,260 --> 00:52:36,250 - No. I gotta go. - 624 00:52:36,380 --> 00:52:40,370 Yeah, I'll call you when I get there, I promise. I love you too, yeah. OK, bye. 625 00:52:40,500 --> 00:52:42,460 Oh, Mom! 626 00:52:43,500 --> 00:52:47,460 627 00:52:50,780 --> 00:52:55,930 Come, they told me, pa rum pa pum pum 628 00:52:58,540 --> 00:53:02,850 A newborn king to see, pa rum pa pum pum 629 00:53:03,900 --> 00:53:08,580 Our finest gifts we bring, pa rum pa pum pum 630 00:53:11,140 --> 00:53:15,820 To lay before the king, pa rum pa pum pum 631 00:53:15,940 --> 00:53:19,380 Rum pa pum pum, rum pa pum pum 632 00:53:22,060 --> 00:53:27,090 So to honour him, pa rum pa pum pum 633 00:53:36,900 --> 00:53:38,860 Welcome to Toad Hall. 634 00:53:42,580 --> 00:53:47,210 I have never seen such a vulgar display of wealth in my entire life. 635 00:53:47,340 --> 00:53:50,300 - How do I get one? - Well, you can do what we did. 636 00:53:50,420 --> 00:53:52,890 - Bootlegging bought the place. - Bootlegging? 637 00:53:53,020 --> 00:53:55,900 Uh-huh. Before Gramps went legit. 638 00:53:56,020 --> 00:53:57,580 Huh. 639 00:54:02,060 --> 00:54:04,050 Oh, these are not for you, OK? 640 00:54:04,180 --> 00:54:07,300 - Remember. - Thanks. I feel like I'm in a museum. 641 00:54:07,420 --> 00:54:09,780 lt's not much, but it's home. 642 00:54:10,900 --> 00:54:13,100 - Maggie! - Skip! 643 00:54:13,220 --> 00:54:15,690 - Hi, gorgeous! - How you doin'? 644 00:54:15,820 --> 00:54:19,610 Great. I want you to meet Jonathon, my roommate, and a chronic bed-wetter. 645 00:54:19,740 --> 00:54:23,130 You are not too old for me to put you over my knee, now. 646 00:54:23,260 --> 00:54:26,890 Really? Oh, do it now, Maggie, do it now. 647 00:54:27,020 --> 00:54:29,170 You're crazy! 648 00:54:29,300 --> 00:54:31,260 No, I got it. 649 00:54:41,460 --> 00:54:43,020 Wow. 650 00:54:43,300 --> 00:54:45,260 - Hey! - Hey. 651 00:54:48,220 --> 00:54:52,690 You know, this room has always had a special place in my heart. 652 00:54:52,820 --> 00:54:54,780 Come here. 653 00:55:11,580 --> 00:55:13,780 - I'd better not. - You'd better. 654 00:55:14,620 --> 00:55:19,380 You wanna get good and ripped for an evening at home with the Burroughs. 655 00:55:21,300 --> 00:55:24,980 Don't let the old man scare you. lf you wanna get on his good side, 656 00:55:25,100 --> 00:55:27,740 tell him you get a hard-on for firm government control. 657 00:55:28,340 --> 00:55:33,490 Government control, Jonathon, is anathema to the free-enterprise system. 658 00:55:33,620 --> 00:55:36,180 Any intelligent person knows you cannot interfere 659 00:55:36,300 --> 00:55:38,770 with the laws of supply and demand. 660 00:55:38,900 --> 00:55:41,650 I see your point, sir. That's why I'm not for tariffs. 661 00:55:41,780 --> 00:55:43,500 Right. 662 00:55:43,620 --> 00:55:48,460 No, wrong. You gotta have tariffs. How you gonna compete with the foreigners? 663 00:55:48,580 --> 00:55:51,810 - Gotta have tariffs. - Jonathon, how can you be so blind? 664 00:55:51,940 --> 00:55:53,290 665 00:55:53,420 --> 00:55:55,850 We're in here, dear. We're havin' a drink. 666 00:55:55,980 --> 00:55:57,330 Mom? 667 00:55:58,260 --> 00:55:59,690 Mom! 668 00:55:59,820 --> 00:56:01,570 Are these for me? 669 00:56:01,700 --> 00:56:03,850 Here, let me have them. 670 00:56:07,860 --> 00:56:12,140 I want you to meet my roommate Jonathon. Jonathon, this is my mom. 671 00:56:17,220 --> 00:56:18,450 Uh... 672 00:56:18,580 --> 00:56:21,860 Uh... very nice to meet you, Mrs Burroughs. 673 00:56:21,980 --> 00:56:23,860 Hello. Hello. 674 00:56:23,980 --> 00:56:26,570 Um... well... 675 00:56:26,700 --> 00:56:31,410 I would like to freshen up, so I... I think I will freshen up, and, um... 676 00:56:31,540 --> 00:56:34,500 l'll see you all at dinner. Darling. 677 00:56:39,980 --> 00:56:45,420 Well, let's see, where were we before... we were interrupted? 678 00:56:46,300 --> 00:56:48,050 Oh, yes. Government interference. 679 00:56:48,180 --> 00:56:52,890 l'm also adamantly opposed to the government baling out corporations. 680 00:56:53,020 --> 00:56:55,250 Unless it's one of our corporations. 681 00:56:55,380 --> 00:56:59,210 Hm. Quick. Pretty quick, huh, Jonathon? 682 00:56:59,340 --> 00:57:02,300 - Chip off the old block. - Holy fuckin' shit. 683 00:57:23,140 --> 00:57:24,730 Jonathon? 684 00:57:24,860 --> 00:57:26,820 Yes, sir? 685 00:57:29,700 --> 00:57:32,740 Evidently you and l have something in common. 686 00:57:37,340 --> 00:57:40,140 Can you guess what that might be? 687 00:57:41,180 --> 00:57:43,850 Leave it, Maggie'll get it. Maggie! 688 00:57:46,100 --> 00:57:47,900 Jonathon. 689 00:57:48,060 --> 00:57:52,580 l, too, was the first boy in my class at Vernon to be accepted into Harvard. 690 00:57:54,540 --> 00:57:57,900 Jonathon, how wonderful. Congratulations. 691 00:58:07,260 --> 00:58:10,700 Why don't you try the roast, dear? lt's a superb cut. 692 00:58:13,020 --> 00:58:14,980 Thank you, sweetheart. 693 00:58:29,820 --> 00:58:35,100 Wish we had food like this at old Vermin. We'd probably have a lot fewer suicides. 694 00:58:35,220 --> 00:58:37,580 lf you concentrated more on studies than jokes, 695 00:58:37,700 --> 00:58:41,660 perhaps you too would've been accepted into Harvard by now. 696 00:58:46,060 --> 00:58:48,620 Well, uh, Jonathon, back to Harvard. 697 00:58:49,660 --> 00:58:52,540 I imagine this is a very exciting time in your life. 698 00:58:52,660 --> 00:58:54,860 Oh, yes. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. 699 00:58:54,980 --> 00:58:59,770 I bet you are. Well, it's a turning point, really. If you study hard at Harvard, 700 00:58:59,900 --> 00:59:02,570 you'll be able to write your own ticket. 701 00:59:08,380 --> 00:59:11,210 Darling, get me some more wine, would you? 702 00:59:12,740 --> 00:59:14,860 Why don't you wait for the last course? 703 00:59:15,780 --> 00:59:18,770 That was quite a display you put on at the dinner table. 704 00:59:18,900 --> 00:59:22,100 I guess it doesn't matter what you do in private. 705 00:59:27,380 --> 00:59:29,180 Let me tell you somethin', lady. 706 00:59:29,300 --> 00:59:33,580 As long as you're in this house with me, representing this family, 707 00:59:34,980 --> 00:59:40,130 you will control that neurosis or whatever the hell it is you think you've got. 708 00:59:47,180 --> 00:59:52,330 And you'll behave like a Burroughs even if you don't feel like one. Is that clear? 709 01:00:28,860 --> 01:00:30,420 Jonathon? 710 01:00:45,020 --> 01:00:47,450 Jonathon, I have to talk to you. 711 01:00:48,900 --> 01:00:50,860 What do you want? 712 01:00:55,260 --> 01:00:57,330 - I'm so sorry. - Sorry? 713 01:00:57,460 --> 01:01:00,930 - Jesus, your son is in the next room! - I would never have done it 714 01:01:01,060 --> 01:01:03,210 if I'd known who you were. 715 01:01:05,740 --> 01:01:09,100 Look... I... I need to explain. 716 01:01:09,220 --> 01:01:11,780 - No. No, you don't. - Please. 717 01:01:13,740 --> 01:01:16,490 Jesus, I don't know what you want from me. 718 01:01:16,620 --> 01:01:20,220 lf you want understanding, OK. I understand. 719 01:01:24,100 --> 01:01:26,820 Would you please hold me? Would you? 720 01:01:26,940 --> 01:01:28,900 No, I can't. 721 01:01:29,020 --> 01:01:31,330 Hey, ace, are you awake? 722 01:01:32,300 --> 01:01:34,260 Argh! Shit! 723 01:01:34,940 --> 01:01:36,900 Ow! Jesus. 724 01:01:37,940 --> 01:01:39,690 What are you doing? 725 01:01:39,820 --> 01:01:43,340 Uh, I was trying to open the door for you. I tripped. 726 01:01:43,460 --> 01:01:45,420 What a gonad! 727 01:01:47,620 --> 01:01:49,580 Get dressed. 728 01:01:58,420 --> 01:02:01,490 So, what did you think of dinner? 729 01:02:01,620 --> 01:02:04,660 lt's, uh, pretty fuckin' entertaining, huh? 730 01:02:12,500 --> 01:02:15,490 Do you ever wonder if your parents still do it? 731 01:02:20,540 --> 01:02:24,530 Actually, I think my parents have a pretty normal relationship. 732 01:02:24,660 --> 01:02:28,020 He tells her exactly what to do, and she ignores him. 733 01:02:37,300 --> 01:02:39,810 l'm never gettin' married. 734 01:02:39,940 --> 01:02:43,010 - Neither am I. - That'll break a lot of hearts. 735 01:02:56,540 --> 01:02:59,290 - How you doin', Jonathon? - Good. 736 01:02:59,420 --> 01:03:02,810 Good man. Who wants to race me to the fence? 737 01:03:02,940 --> 01:03:05,500 - How about you, Skip? - Whoa! 738 01:03:06,380 --> 01:03:08,340 Come on! 739 01:03:19,820 --> 01:03:21,890 How are you? 740 01:03:22,020 --> 01:03:24,380 I want you off this property today. 741 01:03:30,500 --> 01:03:35,370 - So, how was the snow where you were? - lt was fabulous. We had five inches. 742 01:03:37,140 --> 01:03:40,580 Oh, man. Comin' back here is depressing enough. 743 01:03:40,700 --> 01:03:43,090 Havin' to face exams is almost more than I can bear. 744 01:03:43,220 --> 01:03:46,370 Having to examine your face is almost more than we can bear. 745 01:03:46,500 --> 01:03:49,140 - Funny. - You're a mindless idiot. I mean it. 746 01:03:49,260 --> 01:03:52,010 You're a wit, Roscoe. You're a true wit. 747 01:03:52,140 --> 01:03:54,210 - See you later. - OK, bye. 748 01:04:06,660 --> 01:04:08,300 749 01:04:08,420 --> 01:04:11,090 OK, you guys, the kid is back! 750 01:04:13,860 --> 01:04:15,820 - Hey, buddy. - Miss me? 751 01:04:16,980 --> 01:04:20,290 Do you really think an investigation of our students is necessary? 752 01:04:20,420 --> 01:04:23,570 Yes, I do. So does the state of lllinois. 753 01:04:23,700 --> 01:04:26,370 I want to see the student files as soon as possible. 754 01:04:26,500 --> 01:04:29,810 I think the only way to clear up the problem is... 755 01:04:29,940 --> 01:04:32,450 ls there somebody out there? 756 01:04:32,580 --> 01:04:34,540 Uh, yes, sir. lt's, uh, me, sir. 757 01:04:34,660 --> 01:04:38,180 And what can I do for you, Mr Maybaum? 758 01:04:38,300 --> 01:04:43,220 Mrs Hayworth needs your signatures on here. I mean, your signature. 759 01:04:43,340 --> 01:04:45,300 To sign it. 760 01:05:00,940 --> 01:05:02,170 761 01:05:05,060 --> 01:05:07,370 I don't get it! I don't get it! 762 01:05:07,500 --> 01:05:09,860 I don't wanna get it! I hate it! 763 01:05:12,380 --> 01:05:14,890 - Skip. - No, forget it. There's no way. 764 01:05:15,020 --> 01:05:18,300 l'm a dead man. Adios, Harvard. Bonjour , Trade Tech. 765 01:05:18,420 --> 01:05:20,380 OK, look, look. 766 01:05:20,500 --> 01:05:22,540 lf the area un... Skip. 767 01:05:23,700 --> 01:05:27,250 lf the area under the curve represented by F times the quantity X 768 01:05:27,380 --> 01:05:32,090 is bounded by vertical lines X = sub A and X = sub B, what do you have to find? 769 01:05:32,220 --> 01:05:34,650 - A gun. lt's hopeless. - 770 01:05:34,780 --> 01:05:37,090 Meeting in Roscoe's room after lights out! 771 01:05:37,220 --> 01:05:39,450 That's in three hours. I better get ready. 772 01:05:39,580 --> 01:05:43,130 All I heard was that he was talkin' about some investigation. 773 01:05:43,260 --> 01:05:46,410 - What investigation? - I don't know. That's what I'm tellin' you. 774 01:05:46,540 --> 01:05:48,500 775 01:05:52,580 --> 01:05:55,140 ..five, six, seven, eight. 776 01:05:55,260 --> 01:05:59,410 - Jonathon, telephone. - Jonathon, telephone. 777 01:06:02,980 --> 01:06:05,260 - Hello? - Jonathon? 778 01:06:05,380 --> 01:06:07,970 - Oh, God. - How are you? 779 01:06:08,100 --> 01:06:10,980 - Are you serious? - Why didn't you say goodbye? 780 01:06:11,100 --> 01:06:14,220 - Look, you ordered me off the property. - Did I? 781 01:06:16,500 --> 01:06:20,100 - Don't play games with me, huh? - I have to see you. 782 01:06:20,220 --> 01:06:22,580 Yeah, I can't talk. I gotta go. 783 01:06:24,300 --> 01:06:27,980 - Take care of yourself. - Yeah. Yeah, you too. 784 01:06:28,100 --> 01:06:32,380 - Why don't we just kill the guy? - lt'd be good if we could. 785 01:06:32,500 --> 01:06:34,780 - Who was it? - Huh? 786 01:06:35,820 --> 01:06:37,650 On the phone. 787 01:06:37,780 --> 01:06:38,740 Oh. 788 01:06:38,860 --> 01:06:41,770 My mom. The dog died. 789 01:06:41,900 --> 01:06:43,490 No shit. 790 01:06:43,620 --> 01:06:47,370 - What does this guy look like? - Hitler, man. The guy looks like Hitler. 791 01:06:47,500 --> 01:06:51,380 He's got a little moustache and beady little eyes. He stares right through you. 792 01:06:51,500 --> 01:06:55,730 The bastard never blinks. I was in there for five minutes, the guy didn't blink once. 793 01:06:55,860 --> 01:06:58,930 He just... stares right through you. He goes... 794 01:07:24,940 --> 01:07:26,610 Yeah! 795 01:07:26,740 --> 01:07:30,420 All right, so it's me, Roger, Doug, and Barry. 796 01:07:30,540 --> 01:07:32,500 797 01:07:37,420 --> 01:07:39,380 ..five, six, seven, eight. 798 01:07:40,860 --> 01:07:44,010 - Phone again for Jonathon. - His dog died again. 799 01:07:46,140 --> 01:07:48,290 Shh! OK, look, here's the plan. 800 01:07:49,580 --> 01:07:51,810 This is the bedroom. There's a window here. 801 01:07:51,940 --> 01:07:56,090 lf it's clear, we'll all come around this corner and go through the window. 802 01:07:56,220 --> 01:07:58,180 - Search for anything. - Anything. 803 01:07:58,660 --> 01:08:02,650 - Yeah, I'm still here. - Just to talk. Just for an hour. 804 01:08:02,780 --> 01:08:05,500 - I can't, OK? - Jonathon. 805 01:08:05,620 --> 01:08:08,050 - Can't. - Just for an hour. 806 01:08:08,180 --> 01:08:11,540 Please. Come on, don't call me any more, all right? 807 01:08:14,700 --> 01:08:15,690 Jesus. 808 01:08:26,580 --> 01:08:28,540 809 01:08:44,260 --> 01:08:46,220 OK, let's go. 810 01:08:48,820 --> 01:08:50,860 Come on, come on! 811 01:08:50,980 --> 01:08:53,100 Shh! Get down. Let's go. 812 01:09:12,860 --> 01:09:14,690 - Holy shit! - What? 813 01:09:15,100 --> 01:09:16,770 - Guy's a fuckin' narc! - Shh! 814 01:09:16,900 --> 01:09:18,460 Hello? 815 01:09:20,740 --> 01:09:22,140 Hello? 816 01:09:22,260 --> 01:09:23,300 Hello? 817 01:09:24,460 --> 01:09:26,770 Shit! Let's get outta here! 818 01:09:31,220 --> 01:09:33,260 - Is anybody there? - Go! Go! 819 01:09:34,620 --> 01:09:37,130 Get outta my way! Get outta my way, dammit! 820 01:09:37,260 --> 01:09:40,220 - Shit! - Come on, man, move it. Go. Go. 821 01:09:40,340 --> 01:09:41,930 Hello? 822 01:09:56,660 --> 01:09:59,380 - When's the bust? - I don't know! 823 01:09:59,500 --> 01:10:01,860 Raid. Raid, man. 824 01:10:01,980 --> 01:10:04,410 - What's goin' on? - The guy is a narc. 825 01:10:05,900 --> 01:10:10,050 - You better dump it all! - I'll never make it through exams now! 826 01:10:13,660 --> 01:10:14,650 Quick! 827 01:10:18,780 --> 01:10:21,530 lf you have anything, you'd better dump it right now. 828 01:10:22,620 --> 01:10:25,500 - How are you gonna flush that? - Watch me. 829 01:10:27,060 --> 01:10:29,780 Outta my way. I got shit to flush here. 830 01:10:43,900 --> 01:10:46,260 Make way, gentlemen, please. 831 01:10:48,020 --> 01:10:49,980 Read 'em and weep. 832 01:10:52,540 --> 01:10:54,690 All right! Whoo-hoo! 833 01:10:54,820 --> 01:10:59,740 Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! All right! All right! Whoo-hoo! 834 01:11:03,420 --> 01:11:05,540 Whoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! 835 01:11:06,900 --> 01:11:10,860 Jonathon! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 836 01:11:10,980 --> 01:11:15,420 - Ya-da-da-da-da-da! Ya-da-da-da-da-da! - Skip! Skip. 837 01:11:15,540 --> 01:11:17,930 - Well? - You passed. 838 01:11:18,060 --> 01:11:21,610 Passed, my ass, man. We're number one and two, me and you. 839 01:11:21,740 --> 01:11:23,970 Thanks to you, we're a friggin' genius! 840 01:11:24,100 --> 01:11:27,010 - So we're gonna party our balls off. - I can't. 841 01:11:27,140 --> 01:11:29,290 - I didn't hear that. - I gotta go to Chicago. 842 01:11:29,420 --> 01:11:33,170 - Great thinkin'. I own the town. - No, come on, I'm goin' alone, Skip. 843 01:11:33,300 --> 01:11:37,900 Jesus, not that shit again. I told you to forget about her. You'll never find her. 844 01:11:38,500 --> 01:11:41,860 No, I'm not goin' for that. I just wanna be alone, OK? 845 01:11:42,740 --> 01:11:44,300 OK. 846 01:11:49,420 --> 01:11:53,300 But next time you're feelin' sad and blue, don't expect old Skipper here 847 01:11:53,420 --> 01:11:57,170 to put on his big red nose and floppy shoes just pour vous. 848 01:12:00,940 --> 01:12:03,500 Adios... Mr Morose. 849 01:12:09,940 --> 01:12:11,900 Yeah! Yeah! 850 01:12:18,780 --> 01:12:23,810 Jesus Christ, I'm not the one who calls you up every week for a month, OK? 851 01:12:23,940 --> 01:12:27,410 Do you understand your son is my roommate, my best friend, OK? 852 01:12:27,540 --> 01:12:30,290 I can't believe we're arguing about this. 853 01:12:33,380 --> 01:12:35,890 I came here today cos I felt sorry for you. 854 01:12:36,620 --> 01:12:39,770 Where the hell do you get off talking to me like that? 855 01:12:39,900 --> 01:12:42,410 You don't know anything about me. 856 01:12:42,540 --> 01:12:45,100 You don't know anything about my life. 857 01:12:46,100 --> 01:12:48,460 When I first saw you in that bar... 858 01:12:50,460 --> 01:12:52,420 you were pathetic. 859 01:12:54,300 --> 01:12:56,450 You were a sympathy fuck. 860 01:12:58,500 --> 01:13:00,570 Jesus Christ. 861 01:13:00,700 --> 01:13:02,820 You'd better go, Jonathon. 862 01:13:08,380 --> 01:13:13,850 Um, room service. lt's room 101 7. I'd like a bottle of vodka sent up right away. 863 01:13:14,220 --> 01:13:17,740 - Oh, that'll really help, won't it? - Yes, it will, Jonathon. 864 01:13:17,860 --> 01:13:20,610 A damn sight more than you will. 101 7. 865 01:13:33,420 --> 01:13:35,570 I asked you to go. 866 01:13:38,380 --> 01:13:40,500 You can't call me any more. 867 01:13:40,620 --> 01:13:42,580 I know. 868 01:13:44,220 --> 01:13:45,780 I won't. 869 01:13:48,420 --> 01:13:50,380 l'm sorry. 870 01:14:13,100 --> 01:14:14,610 Hold me. 871 01:14:14,900 --> 01:14:16,970 - Are you sure it'll be all right? - Trust me. 872 01:14:17,100 --> 01:14:20,980 He is in serious trouble. He's forgotten the meaning of the word ''debauchery''. 873 01:14:21,100 --> 01:14:22,740 This is gonna be great. 874 01:14:22,860 --> 01:14:25,900 Bet you've never been with guys as crazy as us. 875 01:14:26,380 --> 01:14:30,010 - Sure he's in here? - Yeah, man, I told you, I followed him. 876 01:14:30,140 --> 01:14:31,700 Shh! 877 01:14:35,020 --> 01:14:37,530 Shh. Shh. Are you ready? Shh. 878 01:14:39,620 --> 01:14:41,050 879 01:14:41,180 --> 01:14:43,140 Room service! 880 01:14:43,900 --> 01:14:44,860 881 01:14:44,980 --> 01:14:47,210 Room service! 882 01:14:57,420 --> 01:14:59,570 - Oh, I'm sorry. - Shit. 883 01:15:00,940 --> 01:15:03,140 - Maybe we ought to leave. - Skip. 884 01:15:04,900 --> 01:15:06,380 Skipper. 885 01:15:09,820 --> 01:15:13,130 Jonathon, aren't you going to introduce your friend? 886 01:15:13,260 --> 01:15:15,620 She got any sisters, Jonathon? 887 01:15:26,980 --> 01:15:30,730 - Well, that was a short party! - Yeah! 888 01:15:33,540 --> 01:15:35,820 Would you please... excuse me? 889 01:15:40,540 --> 01:15:42,500 Skip! Skip! 890 01:16:06,060 --> 01:16:08,020 Lights out! 891 01:16:37,420 --> 01:16:39,380 Look, Skip... 892 01:16:40,420 --> 01:16:43,860 Skip, come on. Look, Skip, I didn't know who she was. 893 01:16:45,180 --> 01:16:47,140 l'm really sorry. 894 01:16:48,300 --> 01:16:50,260 l'm sorry. 895 01:16:52,660 --> 01:16:55,940 Come on... Do you think we should talk about this? 896 01:16:56,700 --> 01:17:01,300 Hey, there's nothin' to talk about. I told you, a fuck is just a fuck. 897 01:17:07,820 --> 01:17:09,380 OK. 898 01:17:27,420 --> 01:17:28,740 Urgh! 899 01:17:28,860 --> 01:17:30,820 What's your problem, Skip? 900 01:17:37,260 --> 01:17:39,540 Argh! Damn you! 901 01:17:39,660 --> 01:17:43,700 - Get outta my way! - Cheap play, Burroughs! I'm warnin' you! 902 01:17:43,820 --> 01:17:46,330 - What the hell is goin' on there? - I don't know. 903 01:17:48,060 --> 01:17:50,210 Son of a bitch! 904 01:17:52,420 --> 01:17:54,570 l'll fix your ass for you! 905 01:17:56,300 --> 01:17:57,370 906 01:17:57,500 --> 01:17:59,930 Burroughs, you bastard. 907 01:18:00,060 --> 01:18:04,420 Watch the language! Burroughs, l've had it with you. Get outta here! 908 01:18:04,540 --> 01:18:08,530 - Yeah, let's go! - 909 01:18:09,380 --> 01:18:12,180 - Hey, man. - Bye-bye! 910 01:18:12,300 --> 01:18:14,340 Take a cold shower! 911 01:18:20,780 --> 01:18:23,900 - Mr Burroughs. - Hello, Jonathon. 912 01:18:24,860 --> 01:18:27,900 - How are you? - Fine. You know when Skip'll be back? 913 01:18:28,020 --> 01:18:30,090 Uh, he should be back soon. 914 01:18:30,220 --> 01:18:32,420 How've you been? 915 01:18:32,540 --> 01:18:34,340 Good. 916 01:18:34,460 --> 01:18:36,740 Pretty busy? 917 01:18:36,860 --> 01:18:38,900 How's your social life? 918 01:18:40,060 --> 01:18:41,620 Girlfriends? 919 01:18:43,300 --> 01:18:44,130 No? 920 01:18:44,260 --> 01:18:47,650 OK, sir. Come on, let's get it over with. I can't take this. 921 01:18:47,780 --> 01:18:49,930 What are you talkin' about? 922 01:18:52,020 --> 01:18:54,170 What am I talkin' about? 923 01:18:56,180 --> 01:18:58,330 What are you doing here? 924 01:18:59,580 --> 01:19:01,730 - Would you excuse us? - Sure. 925 01:19:09,300 --> 01:19:11,180 What's wrong? 926 01:19:11,300 --> 01:19:16,740 Your mother's in the hospital, son. She checked herself in three days ago. 927 01:19:16,860 --> 01:19:19,450 She felt she needed psychiatric help. 928 01:19:20,500 --> 01:19:22,460 She's getting it. 929 01:19:30,460 --> 01:19:32,610 You don't seem surprised. 930 01:19:34,420 --> 01:19:38,490 - What do you want me to say? - What kind of attitude is that? 931 01:19:38,620 --> 01:19:43,570 lt's not an attitude. If she thinks that she needs help, then she should get it. 932 01:19:47,460 --> 01:19:49,660 Face it, Dad, we're just a fucked-up family. 933 01:19:50,020 --> 01:19:52,410 That's the guy. That's the narc. 934 01:19:58,780 --> 01:20:01,500 Gentlemen, I am going to need your help. 935 01:20:01,620 --> 01:20:06,380 This is Mr Balaban. He is from the state attorney general's office, 936 01:20:06,500 --> 01:20:11,420 and he is presently conducting an investigation of the schools in our area. 937 01:20:11,540 --> 01:20:16,570 Apparently, there has been some widespread cheating on the SAT tests. 938 01:20:16,700 --> 01:20:21,540 I hope that Mr Balaban is wrong about Vernon Academy, but nonetheless, 939 01:20:21,660 --> 01:20:24,620 we are going to give him our full cooperation. 940 01:20:27,460 --> 01:20:29,610 - You're dead, Roger! - Asshole! 941 01:20:29,740 --> 01:20:32,300 - You stupid shit! - A narc, huh? 942 01:20:32,420 --> 01:20:36,170 - You asshole! - I flushed $300 down the goddamn toilet! 943 01:20:40,660 --> 01:20:44,890 So, this is a real pain-in-the-ass way to meet, isn't it? 944 01:20:45,020 --> 01:20:48,170 - I hear you're already headed to Harvard. - Yes. 945 01:20:50,340 --> 01:20:53,380 You got a near-perfect score on your SAT test. 946 01:20:54,300 --> 01:20:58,660 Very impressive. Normally I would've suspected you right away. 947 01:21:00,300 --> 01:21:03,100 Right away. 948 01:21:03,220 --> 01:21:06,260 But you've been a straight-A student all your life, so... 949 01:21:06,380 --> 01:21:09,260 the only conclusion I can draw is, either you're innocent, 950 01:21:09,380 --> 01:21:13,580 or you've been stealing tests since you were in nursery school. 951 01:21:15,620 --> 01:21:18,180 I guess we better get down to business. 952 01:21:30,740 --> 01:21:33,490 l'm gonna have to ask you some questions. 953 01:21:35,580 --> 01:21:39,020 Do you have any knowledge of the stolen SAT tests? 954 01:21:40,820 --> 01:21:42,780 No, sir. 955 01:21:43,620 --> 01:21:45,770 Did you purchase an SAT test? 956 01:21:47,820 --> 01:21:49,780 No, sir. 957 01:22:01,180 --> 01:22:01,740 Thank you. 958 01:22:02,060 --> 01:22:04,260 They kept Ostroff for an hour and a half. 959 01:22:04,380 --> 01:22:08,260 - I heard they nailed Powers. - Powers! What a jerk-off! 960 01:22:08,380 --> 01:22:13,010 He didn't cheat, but he's so scared he confessed to smokin', goin' off campus, 961 01:22:13,140 --> 01:22:16,420 - and spyin' on Kennedy's wife in the can. - Oh, man! 962 01:22:16,540 --> 01:22:18,580 Well, I tell you somethin', 963 01:22:18,700 --> 01:22:22,740 it'll take more than some fag from the attorney general's office to open my lips. 964 01:22:22,860 --> 01:22:24,900 Yeah! Two fags! 965 01:22:25,020 --> 01:22:29,540 Fuck you, Roscoe! Wait till you get in there, you'll be Jell-O guts. 966 01:22:33,820 --> 01:22:35,780 How you doin'? 967 01:22:53,300 --> 01:22:55,450 You heard from Harvard. 968 01:23:04,820 --> 01:23:06,170 Hey. 969 01:23:06,900 --> 01:23:08,810 Congratulations. 970 01:23:18,860 --> 01:23:21,140 Seldom seen by civilised man, 971 01:23:21,260 --> 01:23:24,170 this sacred rituaI was captured by our camera... 972 01:23:24,300 --> 01:23:25,860 973 01:23:34,380 --> 01:23:37,290 - Shut the projector off, please. - 974 01:23:37,420 --> 01:23:40,060 More bodies for the inquisition, Mr Maybaum? 975 01:23:40,180 --> 01:23:41,770 Yes, ma'am. 976 01:23:42,060 --> 01:23:46,180 Mr Simons and Mr Burroughs, you are today's lucky winners. 977 01:23:48,860 --> 01:23:50,820 - Thank you, ma'am. - Shit. 978 01:24:00,460 --> 01:24:03,020 I know we're supposed to give our full cooperation 979 01:24:03,140 --> 01:24:05,530 to this stupid and pointless investigation, 980 01:24:05,660 --> 01:24:08,380 but when they interrupt one of my classes, 981 01:24:08,860 --> 01:24:10,820 it pisses me off. 982 01:24:12,660 --> 01:24:14,860 This is now my favourite class. 983 01:24:17,780 --> 01:24:19,770 Come in. Sit down. 984 01:24:28,580 --> 01:24:30,140 Squire. 985 01:24:32,180 --> 01:24:35,930 So, this is a real pain-in-the-ass way to meet, isn't it? 986 01:24:36,940 --> 01:24:40,250 I see you, uh... applied to Harvard. 987 01:24:40,380 --> 01:24:44,060 l'm an NYU man myself. l... worked my way through. 988 01:24:50,740 --> 01:24:53,170 Got a very high score on your SAT. 989 01:24:54,460 --> 01:24:55,780 ''Burroughs''. 990 01:24:55,900 --> 01:25:00,370 You're not by any chance related to the Burroughs who's on the board of AT&T? 991 01:25:00,500 --> 01:25:02,090 Daddy. 992 01:25:02,220 --> 01:25:04,180 Really? 993 01:25:04,460 --> 01:25:09,900 Ha-ha. I would imagine that the pressure to get into Harvard must be very intense. 994 01:25:12,380 --> 01:25:14,420 Your grades weren't bad. 995 01:25:15,100 --> 01:25:17,330 Your grades were all right. 996 01:25:17,460 --> 01:25:20,050 But it was the SAT score that got you in. 997 01:25:23,260 --> 01:25:25,820 I don't wanna put you through this. 998 01:25:26,740 --> 01:25:30,020 But we've all done things that we're ashamed of. 999 01:25:30,140 --> 01:25:32,530 Things that we have to live with. 1000 01:25:32,660 --> 01:25:36,260 Sometimes painfully. Because only occasionally... 1001 01:25:36,380 --> 01:25:40,530 does the opportunity present itself to rectify our mistakes. 1002 01:25:40,660 --> 01:25:44,620 And with that said, I guess we should get down to business. 1003 01:25:47,740 --> 01:25:51,020 Do you have any knowledge of the stolen SAT tests? 1004 01:25:55,940 --> 01:25:59,090 Mr Burroughs, where do you think you're going? 1005 01:26:00,580 --> 01:26:02,540 Fuck you. 1006 01:26:05,500 --> 01:26:08,970 - He really said ''Fuck you''? - He looked him straight in the eye, 1007 01:26:09,100 --> 01:26:10,900 - said it, and walked out. - All right! 1008 01:26:11,020 --> 01:26:12,290 I couldn't believe it! 1009 01:26:12,420 --> 01:26:15,220 - He told Balaban to go fuck himself. - No shit? 1010 01:26:15,340 --> 01:26:20,490 - He told Balaban to go fuck himself! - Burroughs told Balaban to fuck himself! 1011 01:26:22,500 --> 01:26:24,620 Hey! Skip! 1012 01:26:31,220 --> 01:26:33,580 Good job! 1013 01:26:51,580 --> 01:26:53,140 Skip! 1014 01:26:54,540 --> 01:26:57,290 Come on. Why didn't you turn me in? Huh? 1015 01:26:58,340 --> 01:27:01,330 You don't talk to me. You save my ass, but you don't talk to me. 1016 01:27:01,460 --> 01:27:04,820 Well, thanks, buddy. Maybe I'll do the same for you sometime, huh? 1017 01:27:04,940 --> 01:27:07,300 What could anybody do for Mr Perfect, though? 1018 01:27:07,420 --> 01:27:10,300 Hey, I got it. I'll drop dead. Wouldn't that be nice, huh? 1019 01:27:11,220 --> 01:27:15,420 I could shoot myself. No, you shoot me and mount my head next to the moose. 1020 01:27:15,540 --> 01:27:20,380 You could stretch the panties between my ears. Come on, you'd love that! 1021 01:27:20,500 --> 01:27:23,860 How the hell was I supposed to know who she was? You sent me to the bar. 1022 01:27:23,980 --> 01:27:26,340 You send her there to get laid, too? 1023 01:27:27,860 --> 01:27:32,410 You son of a bitch. You went back there even after you knew who she was. 1024 01:27:54,820 --> 01:27:57,380 Goddammit, you're gonna talk to me! 1025 01:28:24,660 --> 01:28:27,860 Oh, get away from me! Get away from me, you... 1026 01:28:30,460 --> 01:28:34,500 OK, you wanna talk? You wanna fucking talk, you lying son of a bitch? 1027 01:28:34,620 --> 01:28:36,770 You bastard! Come on! Come on! 1028 01:28:41,020 --> 01:28:43,900 - I'm sorry, man. - Come on, let's go! 1029 01:28:45,100 --> 01:28:46,820 Come on. 1030 01:28:47,300 --> 01:28:49,770 - Cut it out! - I'm gonna kick your fuckin' ass! 1031 01:28:49,900 --> 01:28:52,180 Come on. Cut it out. 1032 01:28:54,060 --> 01:28:56,020 Argh! Shit! 1033 01:29:13,340 --> 01:29:15,410 Stay away from me! 1034 01:29:17,700 --> 01:29:19,660 Argh! Fuck! 1035 01:29:28,060 --> 01:29:29,620 Skip? 1036 01:29:30,260 --> 01:29:31,690 Skip? 1037 01:29:31,820 --> 01:29:33,410 Fuck! 1038 01:29:33,540 --> 01:29:35,580 You son of a bitch! 1039 01:29:47,940 --> 01:29:49,530 Come on! 1040 01:29:51,700 --> 01:29:55,010 - God damn you! - Oh, just back off! 1041 01:30:04,460 --> 01:30:06,420 - Truce! - Truce, shit! 1042 01:30:21,460 --> 01:30:23,820 I never would've seen her again. 1043 01:30:24,780 --> 01:30:26,820 She kept callin' me. 1044 01:30:28,100 --> 01:30:30,530 I just wanted to talk, honest to God. 1045 01:30:31,620 --> 01:30:33,580 But, oh, shit... 1046 01:30:35,780 --> 01:30:38,210 I was in love with her, I really was. 1047 01:30:43,500 --> 01:30:45,650 Oh, man, I'm sorry, Skip. 1048 01:30:49,460 --> 01:30:51,020 Skip? 1049 01:30:56,180 --> 01:30:57,850 1050 01:31:00,340 --> 01:31:01,660 - Jesus! - Whoa! 1051 01:31:01,780 --> 01:31:03,900 What's goin' on? Holy shit! 1052 01:31:04,020 --> 01:31:08,810 - Have you guys been fightin'? - This looks kinda private. We oughta... 1053 01:31:08,940 --> 01:31:10,740 - Oh. Oh. OK. - Yeah. 1054 01:31:10,860 --> 01:31:13,770 lf you need anything, you know, like a neck brace... 1055 01:31:13,900 --> 01:31:17,210 - Come to my room. See you later. - ..we'll be right down the hall. Bye! 1056 01:31:17,340 --> 01:31:19,620 - Real later. - OK, see ya. 1057 01:31:23,980 --> 01:31:26,730 Oh, by the way, your mom called. 1058 01:31:28,140 --> 01:31:29,620 Yeah? 1059 01:31:29,740 --> 01:31:31,700 The dog died. 1060 01:31:33,220 --> 01:31:34,890 What? 1061 01:31:35,020 --> 01:31:36,980 You're so gullible! 1062 01:33:59,460 --> 01:34:01,820 Visiontext Subtitles: Kerrie Slavin 81936

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