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1
00:00:01,543 --> 00:00:04,045
Oh, you could fry an
egg on my forehead.
2
00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:05,046
If you're getting up,
3
00:00:05,088 --> 00:00:06,966
would you get me
another lemonade?
4
00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:14,974
Ready?
5
00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,310
(all sighing)
6
00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:21,229
Stevie's house has
air conditioning.
7
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,106
Let's get some more.
8
00:00:24,817 --> 00:00:28,153
♪ Yes, no, maybe ♪
9
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,906
♪ I don't know ♪
10
00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:34,075
♪ Can you repeat the question? ♪
11
00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:36,244
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
12
00:00:36,286 --> 00:00:38,372
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
13
00:00:38,413 --> 00:00:40,374
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
14
00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:43,126
♪ And you're not so big ♪
15
00:00:43,168 --> 00:00:45,379
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
16
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:47,589
♪ You're not
the boss of me now ♪
17
00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:49,800
♪ You're not the boss
of me now ♪
18
00:00:49,842 --> 00:00:53,094
♪ And you're not so big ♪
19
00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:57,641
♪ Life is unfair. ♪
20
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:04,899
We're not renting the fanciest place on the Big
Island, but, you know,
21
00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:07,401
at least I'll have a place
to work on my cliff diving.
22
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:08,569
Wow.
23
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:10,487
We're actually
sharing a houseboat
24
00:01:10,529 --> 00:01:13,114
with Stevie's family on a man-
made lake by the power plant.
25
00:01:13,156 --> 00:01:15,534
I don't want to meet the
girl that would impress.
26
00:01:16,827 --> 00:01:18,579
Do not touch!
27
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:20,789
I'm not.
28
00:01:21,832 --> 00:01:23,542
Hal. Let me see
your bathing suit.
29
00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,168
No. All these ones
you picked out
30
00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:26,545
are too big and baggy.
31
00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:27,713
Baggy is good.
32
00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:29,798
It's less surface
area I have to shave.
33
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:31,132
I like the little one.
34
00:01:31,174 --> 00:01:33,134
No, Hal, you always pop
out of the little ones.
35
00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:34,219
I do not pop out.
36
00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:35,596
That was one time.
37
00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:37,347
Hal, the Kenarbans are
conservative people.
38
00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:39,975
We're going to be in very
close quarters with them.
39
00:01:40,017 --> 00:01:41,142
Now, you get the baggy ones.
40
00:01:41,184 --> 00:01:42,603
Let me just show you something.
41
00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:45,188
It better not be
that suit in the egg.
42
00:01:45,230 --> 00:01:47,816
Don't say anything
until you see it.
43
00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:49,944
MAN:
Oh, whoa!
44
00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,820
Dewey.
45
00:01:54,239 --> 00:01:57,158
Can I see that spear gun?
46
00:01:58,452 --> 00:01:59,912
Sure.
47
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:10,171
Now, don't tell me this
doesn't do something for you.
48
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:11,632
(gasps)
49
00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:13,174
Oh, I-I'm sorry.
50
00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:15,552
I thought you were my wife.
51
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:18,847
My wife has
the exact same shape...
52
00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:20,057
(gasps)
53
00:02:21,016 --> 00:02:22,476
(gasps)
54
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:25,395
(gasps)
55
00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:28,983
So, maybe when I get back,
you know, if you wanted...
56
00:02:29,024 --> 00:02:30,776
Maybe I can
give you a call.
57
00:02:30,818 --> 00:02:32,444
Maybe.
58
00:02:34,613 --> 00:02:37,198
(laughs):
Whoa. Look at that guy.
59
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:39,660
Psst. Psst.
60
00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,120
Do you know him?
61
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,997
Who? That nutcase?
62
00:02:43,038 --> 00:02:44,205
Of course not.
63
00:02:44,247 --> 00:02:46,834
You want to help me
choose a surfboard?
64
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:47,793
Okay.
65
00:02:47,835 --> 00:02:48,919
Malcolm!
66
00:02:48,961 --> 00:02:51,421
Oh, for the love of...
67
00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:53,757
Excuse me.
68
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:58,219
Oh! God, it's not me--
it's the suit.
69
00:02:58,261 --> 00:02:59,721
I am a normal person!
70
00:02:59,763 --> 00:03:01,098
I'm here with my family.
71
00:03:01,140 --> 00:03:02,933
My son is right over... Malcolm!
72
00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:04,225
Come with me.
No, no, no.
73
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,103
I know how this looks,
but I'm telling you...
74
00:03:06,145 --> 00:03:07,228
Malcolm!
75
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:08,605
Wait, no, no, no.
76
00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:11,274
This is a complete
misunderstanding.
77
00:03:15,154 --> 00:03:16,321
Dude, where were you?
78
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:18,490
If Spangler finds out
you blew off drill practice,
79
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:19,658
he's going to kill you.
80
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,410
I'm not afraid
of Spangler anymore.
81
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:24,038
Why aren't you in uniform?
82
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:26,999
I'm leaving. I'm out of here.
83
00:03:29,584 --> 00:03:31,336
You can't just leave.
Yes.
84
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:32,921
I can. I just turned 18.
85
00:03:32,963 --> 00:03:35,716
I'm legally an adult and
no one can tell me what to do.
86
00:03:35,757 --> 00:03:37,634
I'm getting
the hell out of here.
87
00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:39,970
You're not going to graduate?
Nope.
88
00:03:40,012 --> 00:03:42,263
I'm going to Alaska.
89
00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:43,891
Francis, it's
crazy up there.
90
00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:48,645
You can make $45 an hour working
on oil rigs or logging camps,
91
00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,314
and you don't even
need a diploma.
92
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,984
Wait, $45 an hour?
93
00:03:54,026 --> 00:03:55,986
That's with
room and board.
94
00:03:56,028 --> 00:04:00,991
You work a couple of years,
and you're set for life.
95
00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:06,914
Something to
remember me by.
96
00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,794
Do you realize
how close your father came
97
00:04:12,836 --> 00:04:16,297
to being a registered
sex offender?!
98
00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:18,299
A registered sex offender!
99
00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:21,678
And for what?
For some trampy girl? For...
100
00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,513
Mom, please! I feel terrible.
101
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:25,724
I completely
understand what I did.
102
00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:28,018
I sold out
my own father for a girl.
103
00:04:28,060 --> 00:04:29,394
It's, like, the worst
thing I've ever done.
104
00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:32,355
We both agree,
I'm a terrible person.
105
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,315
For some girl
you don't even know!
106
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:36,317
Who wouldn't give you
the time of day!
107
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:38,904
That's the gratitude
you showed your father.
108
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:41,240
Hey, maybe I'm
the good one after all.
109
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,490
Here, Mom,
for your throat.
110
00:04:42,532 --> 00:04:44,325
I put a little
honey in it.
111
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,326
That man gets
112
00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:46,620
one vacation a year,
113
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:49,330
and this is how you start it.
(phone ringing)
114
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:51,541
You go and make it right!
115
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,335
Hello.
116
00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:55,796
Dad's probably
not that mad at me.
117
00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,422
I mean, it's not
like I personally
118
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,800
shoved him
in the squad car, right?
119
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,846
Dad, can I
talk to you?
120
00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:06,556
Uh, no, not right now.
I'm kind of busy.
121
00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:08,809
Reese, can you come in here
and help me with something?
122
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:10,060
Oh, sure, Dad.
123
00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:11,436
I love to be helpful
124
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,188
Close the door.
125
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:18,359
Absolutely not, Francis!
126
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:20,070
Mom, you're not listening.
127
00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:22,530
I can make $45 an hour.
128
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,158
That's more than
you or Dad makes.
129
00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:27,577
You are going
to graduate from high school.
130
00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:28,662
Why spend the tuition?
131
00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:30,371
It's a total waste of money.
132
00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:31,832
We both know I'm failing.
133
00:05:32,791 --> 00:05:34,251
Okay, now we both know.
134
00:05:34,293 --> 00:05:37,462
Francis, you are going to stay
in school until you graduate,
135
00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:40,299
and that's all there is to it,
and if you flunk out,
136
00:05:40,339 --> 00:05:43,302
then that's just another year
you're stuck there!
137
00:05:43,342 --> 00:05:44,385
You just can't stand the fact
138
00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:46,680
that I'll be making
more money than you!
139
00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:49,474
(screams)
140
00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:59,026
Whoa, that was close.
141
00:06:06,325 --> 00:06:09,703
KITTY: Oh, look at all this
lovely scenery and nature.
142
00:06:09,744 --> 00:06:12,413
This is going
to be wonderful.
143
00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:15,125
Dear, did you pack my hat?
144
00:06:15,167 --> 00:06:16,251
Oh, I'm sorry, honey.
145
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:17,919
You should have
asked me to.
146
00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:18,920
No problem.
147
00:06:18,962 --> 00:06:22,423
I'll just create one
out of newspaper.
148
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:23,633
Everything okay?
149
00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:26,678
Everything's wonderful.
We're on vacation.
150
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:30,807
The whole drive up here,
Dad wouldn't even look at me.
151
00:06:30,849 --> 00:06:33,810
I just wish I could take
those two minutes back.
152
00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:36,730
That's the King of the Seas?
153
00:06:37,522 --> 00:06:38,732
(shrieks)
154
00:06:38,773 --> 00:06:41,943
There's no TV! There's
no TV! There's no TV!
155
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,444
There's no TV!
156
00:06:43,486 --> 00:06:47,282
(chuckles)
There's your TV.
157
00:06:47,324 --> 00:06:49,450
I don't see any TV.
158
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,036
Excuse me.
159
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:52,287
Okay.
160
00:06:53,496 --> 00:06:55,123
Dad, I'll help you
with that.
161
00:06:55,165 --> 00:06:57,709
No, no. I've got it.
162
00:06:57,751 --> 00:06:59,044
Dad.
163
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:00,379
Please, wait.
164
00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:01,546
Come on.
165
00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,464
Talk to me, please.
166
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,385
Okay, fine.
167
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:07,468
(laughs)
168
00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:09,554
I wanted to wait
until this afternoon,
169
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,306
but what the heck.
170
00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:13,600
Check this out.
171
00:07:15,018 --> 00:07:16,353
It's a Cavanaugh.
172
00:07:16,395 --> 00:07:17,562
You remember last year
173
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,480
you saw a picture in a magazine
174
00:07:19,522 --> 00:07:21,191
of a father and a son
fishing together
175
00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:24,485
and you said, "Oh, I'd like
to try that sometime"?
176
00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:25,737
Yeah?
177
00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:27,655
Yeah, well, I just kept
looking at that picture
178
00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,950
and I was thinking
about you and me
179
00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:32,535
and I... started putting
a little money away,
180
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:35,496
and, you know, I just...
181
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,416
I got this for you.
182
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:41,502
Oh, man, you wouldn't believe
how hard this week has been.
183
00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:42,921
Every time that
I looked at you,
184
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,756
I wanted to spill
the beans, but...
185
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:47,342
This is why you
wouldn't talk to me?
186
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:48,593
We'll take the dinghy out
187
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:51,512
and we'll do some fishing,
just the two of us.
188
00:07:51,554 --> 00:07:53,223
Great.
189
00:07:53,265 --> 00:07:55,350
See you on board, Skipper.
190
00:07:57,436 --> 00:08:00,355
Hey, guess who's
still the good one.
191
00:08:11,366 --> 00:08:13,452
Do... (gasps)
192
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,411
you... (gasps)
193
00:08:14,453 --> 00:08:15,662
I see it, too.
194
00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:20,750
Hey, boys, what
are you doing?
195
00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:24,254
I don't know--
what are you doing?
196
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:25,839
(giggling)
197
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,258
Where'd you
get the boat?
198
00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:30,551
We stole it from
our spirit camp.
199
00:08:30,593 --> 00:08:32,929
We're going to
get cigarettes.
200
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:34,222
Spirit camp?
201
00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,557
So you girls are...?
202
00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:37,558
Cheerleaders.
203
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,936
Bad... (gasps)
204
00:08:39,978 --> 00:08:41,271
cheerleaders.
205
00:08:41,313 --> 00:08:44,565
Yeah. We haven't seen any boys
in, like, six weeks.
206
00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:47,568
Even you guys
are starting to look good.
207
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:48,820
(giggling)
208
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:51,239
Tammy!
209
00:08:55,118 --> 00:08:57,245
Wait.
Where are you guys going?
210
00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:59,331
Follow us and find out.
211
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:06,963
Get... (gasps)
212
00:09:07,005 --> 00:09:08,423
the boat!
213
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,427
Ready to go fishing, son?
214
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,012
Now?
Sure.
215
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:17,598
We're catching
everyone's dinner.
216
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,393
Now, don't you take this
personally, all right?
217
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:20,601
This is a special thing
218
00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:22,603
with Malcolm and me,
just this one time.
219
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:25,690
Too bad you can't
come with us.
220
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:28,026
Too bad we're taking the boat.
221
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:41,039
Oh. Oh...
222
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,790
Nope.
223
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,125
At least Reese and Stevie
224
00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:46,836
are as bored
and miserable as I am.
225
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:50,465
Remember...
226
00:09:50,507 --> 00:09:51,925
to call me...
227
00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:53,843
Snoop.
228
00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,643
(yelling)
229
00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:05,146
(all cheering)
230
00:10:12,487 --> 00:10:16,283
(yelling like Tarzan)
231
00:10:31,714 --> 00:10:32,673
(sighs)
This is great--
232
00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:34,884
to just relax
with adults.
233
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,597
"Suffocate."
234
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:41,308
Good for you, Abe.
235
00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,730
"Crybaby."
236
00:10:47,772 --> 00:10:49,608
I believe that's
two words, dear.
237
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:53,111
Okay, then... just "baby."
238
00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:57,282
I heard what
happened, cadet.
239
00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:59,700
My, my, my, all that splintered
wood and broken glass.
240
00:10:59,742 --> 00:11:01,536
(clicks tongue)
241
00:11:01,578 --> 00:11:03,704
I brought you something.
242
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:05,123
What's that?
243
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,707
A hammer, cadet.
244
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:08,918
I expect you to repair
the trophy case.
245
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,129
You'll find lumber
in the common room.
246
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,922
I have a nine-inch gash
in my leg.
247
00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:16,717
Hmm, that's quite a handicap.
248
00:11:16,759 --> 00:11:17,718
Cadet,
249
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:19,720
you damaged school property
250
00:11:19,762 --> 00:11:22,723
and you are the one
responsible for repairing it.
251
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:25,726
Consider it a character
building lesson.
252
00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:27,312
I didn't damage anything.
253
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:28,729
That was negligence.
254
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:31,316
The phone was improperly
connected to the wall.
255
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:32,567
That is totally unfair!
256
00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:35,236
I decide
what's fair around here.
257
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,031
But, wait,
maybe I've been hasty.
258
00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:41,201
No, now that I've reconsidered,
the decision stands.
259
00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:43,744
You will fix the damage
by the end of the week.
260
00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,497
That is all, cadet.
261
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:48,667
(grunts)
262
00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,752
Dewey, you have to
let go of the rope.
263
00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:53,129
You're all sunburned.
264
00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:54,047
No.
265
00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:54,922
Just let go.
266
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:57,634
It's going to be dark soon.
267
00:11:57,676 --> 00:11:58,426
I can't.
268
00:11:58,468 --> 00:11:59,469
Yes, you can.
269
00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:01,179
Just open your fingers.
270
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:02,389
But I'll fall.
271
00:12:02,430 --> 00:12:03,557
That's the point.
272
00:12:03,598 --> 00:12:04,765
Dewey, just don't think.
273
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:06,560
Just do it, just let go.
274
00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:08,645
No!
Oh, for crying out loud.
275
00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:12,607
You let go of that rope,
and you come in for dinner!
276
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:14,651
Come on, honey.
277
00:12:14,693 --> 00:12:15,860
No... ow!
278
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:18,154
Come on, honey,
I'm making French fries.
279
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:19,698
Ow!
280
00:12:19,738 --> 00:12:20,781
Your favorite--
ice cream.
281
00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:22,783
You know you love ice cream.
282
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:26,079
HAL: And it was wriggling
and fighting me.
283
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,788
But finally I got it
on the hook.
284
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:29,165
That was one hell
of a worm.
285
00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:31,792
Thought for sure
I'd catch something with it.
286
00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:34,212
Oh, Dewey, would you
pass the salt, please?
287
00:12:37,131 --> 00:12:38,508
Where'd you get
that shiner?
288
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:40,051
Mom.
289
00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:42,095
It was horrible.
290
00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:44,805
We were stuck
out there for hours.
291
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,433
It was so boring.
292
00:12:49,852 --> 00:12:51,312
What are you smiling about?
293
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:52,855
I like these potatoes.
294
00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,441
(both laugh)
295
00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:56,067
You guys went to the camp?
296
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:58,069
Oh, man, what was it like?
297
00:12:58,111 --> 00:13:00,988
Imagine a hundred fat guys
falling down stairs,
298
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:02,490
knocking over old ladies.
299
00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:05,744
Multiply that by ten,
and you're not even close.
300
00:13:05,784 --> 00:13:06,827
STEVIE:
Until today...
301
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:10,457
I'd have traded...
302
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:14,669
my life... for anybody's.
303
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,550
No way. It's Mom's.
304
00:13:20,592 --> 00:13:22,552
If it were Mom's...
305
00:13:22,594 --> 00:13:24,554
would I do this?
306
00:13:24,596 --> 00:13:26,306
(sniffing)
307
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:27,848
(sighs)
308
00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:31,852
That was delicious.
309
00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:36,023
I am so sorry about Abe.
310
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:37,066
What do you mean?
311
00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:38,859
Oh, you're sweet to pretend,
312
00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:41,362
but I know he is ruining
everyone's vacation
313
00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:44,240
with his pouting
and his sarcastic little digs.
314
00:13:44,282 --> 00:13:46,867
Well, if it's bothering you,
you should talk to him.
315
00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:47,868
(sighs)
316
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,871
Sure is a beautiful night.
317
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,290
You're right.
318
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:54,917
Anything is better than this.
319
00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:56,877
Malcolm, better
hit the hay.
320
00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:59,880
We're getting up
pretty early tomorrow.
321
00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:01,591
Nighty... night.
322
00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:02,883
(both laugh)
323
00:14:02,925 --> 00:14:04,803
ABE: Oh, I'll tell you
what the problem is.
324
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:06,304
I hate this boat!
325
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:07,472
I hate this place!
326
00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:09,182
I hate everything about
this damn vacation!
327
00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:10,891
KITTY: Then why didn't
you say anything?
328
00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,310
ABE: What difference
would it make?
329
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:15,355
This whole trip was your idea,
and God knows,
330
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,898
whatever Kitty wants,
Kitty gets!
331
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,900
KITTY: Stop behaving like
a total ass.
332
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:21,361
You're ruining
everyone's vacation.
333
00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:23,988
ABE: I could be sitting
in a suite in Hawaii right now!
334
00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:26,199
KITTY: You know these people
can't afford that.
335
00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,909
ABE: Well, pardon me
for going to college
336
00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,203
and earning
a decent living.
337
00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:33,414
Should I drive a crappy car
because they do, too?
338
00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:35,916
No, they cannot hear me.
339
00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:39,003
And even if they could,
they'd certainly understand
340
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:41,922
that it's just
my puckish sense of humor.
341
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:43,842
Oh, it will, too, work.
342
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,092
They're not that smart.
343
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:47,928
Turn on the radio.
Yeah.
344
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:51,224
(snoring)
345
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,184
(loud snoring)
346
00:14:59,982 --> 00:15:02,360
(loud snoring continues)
347
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,802
♪ ♪
348
00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:35,769
116...
349
00:15:35,810 --> 00:15:38,646
What?
Nothing.
350
00:15:42,316 --> 00:15:44,444
117...
351
00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:46,362
You know, I didn't want it
to come to this,
352
00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:48,489
but there's only so far
a person can be pushed.
353
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:49,990
You don't have
to persuade me.
354
00:15:50,032 --> 00:15:52,076
This is exactly
the kind of injustice
355
00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:54,913
the Alabama legal system
was designed to address.
356
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,415
Now, just sign here.
357
00:15:58,875 --> 00:16:02,420
And we'll need your parent's
signatures at the bottom.
358
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:11,053
Great.
359
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:13,013
I'm a notary
as well as a lawyer,
360
00:16:13,055 --> 00:16:14,515
so I can have this expedited.
361
00:16:14,557 --> 00:16:16,643
Great.
362
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:19,729
(phone ringing)
363
00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:21,439
(high-pitched voice):
Hello.
364
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:24,024
Well, he's in with a client
right now.
365
00:16:24,066 --> 00:16:26,110
Can he call you back?
366
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:28,613
What's your name, sugar?
367
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:31,031
Mom, no, please!
We can't watch Dewey.
368
00:16:31,073 --> 00:16:32,116
We already have plans.
369
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:33,868
And now they include
your brother.
370
00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:34,869
Mom...
371
00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:36,078
This isn't
a negotiation.
372
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,038
You're going to take
your brother with you
373
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:39,749
and you're going
to have fun with him!
374
00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:42,168
(whimpering)
375
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:47,841
Now, remember,
this is a magic buoy.
376
00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:49,049
Mermaids are drawn to it,
377
00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:50,134
and they'll grant
your every wish.
378
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:52,094
But they won't show up
379
00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:53,930
if there's more than
one person here.
380
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:54,973
Just leave.
381
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,350
Don't insult me.
382
00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:18,496
Hi, Malcolm.
383
00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:21,374
Me and my naked friends
got tired of waiting for you.
384
00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:25,586
You don't want that jerk Reese
to have all the fun, do you?
385
00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:27,797
(gasps)
What happened?
386
00:17:27,839 --> 00:17:29,382
You catch something?
387
00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:30,383
No.
388
00:17:30,424 --> 00:17:32,510
We're never going
to catch anything.
389
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,803
I know.
390
00:17:33,845 --> 00:17:37,097
This is really
awful, isn't it?
391
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:39,099
I don't think
there's a darned fish
392
00:17:39,141 --> 00:17:41,101
in this whole lake.
393
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:43,521
You know what,
it doesn't matter.
394
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:46,858
It's just nice being
out here with you.
395
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:50,778
Dad?
396
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:51,905
Hmm?
397
00:17:51,946 --> 00:17:53,364
You know the other day
at the store
398
00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:55,366
when I pretended
not to know you?
399
00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:56,283
Yeah.
400
00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:58,118
That was a new low.
401
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,497
Well, there was
this girl...
402
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:02,790
Really?
403
00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:06,711
I'm sorry.
404
00:18:06,753 --> 00:18:09,005
I know.
405
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,215
Ooh, looks like
406
00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,508
you got a nibble.
407
00:18:12,550 --> 00:18:15,053
Attaboy. Set the hook.
Set the hook.
408
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:17,013
Yeah, let him run.
Let him run.
409
00:18:17,055 --> 00:18:19,139
Okay, now reel him in.
Reel him in.
410
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:21,141
Attaboy. Attaboy.
Look at that!
411
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:23,603
(laughs)
Come to Papa, baby.
412
00:18:24,896 --> 00:18:26,731
You betcha. Oh, yeah!
413
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,608
Oh! That's a striper!
414
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:30,150
(both laughing)
415
00:18:30,192 --> 00:18:32,152
Look at that beauty!
Way to go, Malcolm!
416
00:18:32,194 --> 00:18:33,654
Thanks, Dad.
417
00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:34,614
(girls laughing)
418
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,824
He's four pounds
if he's an ounce.
419
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,785
Yeah.
420
00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:40,578
(girls laughing)
421
00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:50,880
Huh.
422
00:18:50,922 --> 00:18:52,172
Isn't this your brother's shirt?
423
00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:55,301
(motor revving, Hal screams)
424
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,481
(panting)
425
00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:10,858
Why?
426
00:19:15,029 --> 00:19:18,198
You are in so much trouble!
427
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,119
I know!
428
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,079
I can't believe it either.
429
00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:25,331
Hi, Dewey!
430
00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:39,679
If you'll excuse
me, dear,
431
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:44,142
I believe I'll go take a nap
on my luxurious foam pad.
432
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,937
How long are you going
to let this go on?
433
00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:50,314
I tried to talk to him.
It just didn't help.
434
00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:52,232
Maybe you came
on too strong.
435
00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:53,526
You can start by
apologizing.
436
00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,695
You don't have
to mean it.
437
00:19:55,736 --> 00:19:57,488
Look, you have one day
of vacation left.
438
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,157
You want to spend it like this?
439
00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,117
All right.
440
00:20:01,159 --> 00:20:03,161
I can swallow my pride.
441
00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:09,167
Kitty (yelling): And you think you're
some kind of a picnic?!
442
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:11,251
With your
long-suffering sighs
443
00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:14,172
and your pouting
and your 2:00 a.m. crying jags?!
444
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:18,051
You are a big,
overindulged mama's boy!
445
00:20:18,092 --> 00:20:19,343
ABE:
And you are an uptight,
446
00:20:19,385 --> 00:20:22,513
impossible-to-please
control freak!
447
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,140
I can't take it anymore!
448
00:20:24,182 --> 00:20:26,266
KITTY: Well, what you going
to do about it, mama's boy?
449
00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:29,687
Huh? What's the big mama's boy
going to do about it?!
450
00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,731
(thud)
451
00:20:31,772 --> 00:20:33,273
(loud crash)
452
00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,735
Oh, my God.
453
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,197
♪ ♪
454
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:40,280
Sorry.
455
00:20:40,322 --> 00:20:41,490
I thought you were fighting.
456
00:20:41,532 --> 00:20:44,284
I didn't see anything.
457
00:20:46,704 --> 00:20:49,582
Oh, dear God.
458
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,753
Three weeks
of slave labor,
459
00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:57,006
my relationship with Dad
will never be the same,
460
00:20:57,048 --> 00:20:58,674
and I can't
stop smiling.
461
00:20:58,716 --> 00:21:01,552
Dewey, remember when
we were both stuck on the buoy
462
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:04,097
and you said you wanted
to be a ventriloquist?
463
00:21:04,138 --> 00:21:07,558
Well, I thought it was
something we could do together.
464
00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:10,310
Thanks, Dad.
465
00:21:10,352 --> 00:21:12,230
You're welcome, son.
466
00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:13,898
LOIS:
Oh, my God!
467
00:21:13,940 --> 00:21:14,941
What is it?
468
00:21:14,982 --> 00:21:17,401
It's Francis!
469
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:19,361
He quit school.
470
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:22,322
He's on his way to Alaska.
471
00:21:22,364 --> 00:21:23,616
Well, that's ridiculous.
472
00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:25,243
He can't just take
himself out of school.
473
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:26,326
He has to have our permission.
474
00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:27,494
No, he doesn't.
475
00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:30,330
He got himself
legally emancipated.
31832
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