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1
00:00:00,889 --> 00:00:03,891
[Sensual R&B music playing]
2
00:00:03,892 --> 00:00:09,563
3
00:00:09,564 --> 00:00:11,431
Danny. Danny.
4
00:00:11,432 --> 00:00:13,734
I-I don't want to have sex with you.
5
00:00:13,735 --> 00:00:15,435
Yeah, you're very classy.
Noted.
6
00:00:15,436 --> 00:00:18,005
No. No, no, no.
No, I mean it.
7
00:00:18,006 --> 00:00:19,973
We should stop.
8
00:00:19,974 --> 00:00:22,375
[Sighs] Okay.
9
00:00:22,409 --> 00:00:24,677
- I don't want to rush things.
- "Rush things"?
10
00:00:24,678 --> 00:00:26,345
We've been kissing
for, like, 20 minutes.
11
00:00:26,346 --> 00:00:27,814
That's like a week in guy minutes.
12
00:00:27,815 --> 00:00:29,549
Come on, don't I get credit for that?
13
00:00:29,583 --> 00:00:31,083
Danny, usually when I have sex
with a guy,
14
00:00:31,084 --> 00:00:32,552
we've gone on at least five dates,
15
00:00:32,553 --> 00:00:34,053
or he's spent, like, $2,000 on me,
16
00:00:34,054 --> 00:00:35,287
whichever comes first.
17
00:00:35,288 --> 00:00:36,823
We've gone on hundreds
of dates, hundreds.
18
00:00:36,857 --> 00:00:38,525
We've gone on doctors'-lounge dates,
19
00:00:38,526 --> 00:00:41,375
subway-commute dates,
medical-conference dates.
20
00:00:41,395 --> 00:00:43,029
Okay, that's a good point.
21
00:00:43,030 --> 00:00:44,196
- Okay.
- But, Danny...
22
00:00:44,231 --> 00:00:45,564
Can we just please wait?
23
00:00:45,598 --> 00:00:47,333
[Sighs]
24
00:00:47,334 --> 00:00:49,902
Do you realize there are
literally thousands of girls
25
00:00:49,903 --> 00:00:52,304
in New York City that would kill
to have sex with me right now?
26
00:00:52,339 --> 00:00:54,640
Okay, that seems untrue.
It is true.
27
00:00:54,674 --> 00:00:56,342
I could call up any girl
right now in my phone...
28
00:00:56,343 --> 00:00:57,343
Any girl!
29
00:00:57,377 --> 00:00:58,377
- You know what?
- What?
30
00:00:58,378 --> 00:00:59,412
By all means, give 'em a call.
31
00:00:59,446 --> 00:01:01,213
Oh, you want me to do it?
Call 'em.
32
00:01:01,214 --> 00:01:03,649
[Line trilling] Listen and learn.
33
00:01:03,650 --> 00:01:04,850
(Woman) Hello?
34
00:01:04,851 --> 00:01:06,518
Hey, Abigail, what's up?
It's Danny.
35
00:01:06,519 --> 00:01:08,286
- Danny?
- Castellano.
36
00:01:08,287 --> 00:01:10,522
- Who?
- "D-day"?
37
00:01:10,557 --> 00:01:11,957
No.
38
00:01:11,958 --> 00:01:13,725
It's, uh... it's lil d.
39
00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:15,260
- [Line clicks]
- Hello?
40
00:01:15,294 --> 00:01:17,495
Meredith, what are you up to
right now?
41
00:01:17,496 --> 00:01:18,997
(Meredith) Uh, breast-feeding my son.
42
00:01:19,032 --> 00:01:21,373
Elizabeth, Susan, Billie.
43
00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:22,901
I know it sounds
like a guy's name... it's a girl.
44
00:01:22,936 --> 00:01:25,003
Connie!
Hey, pay attention... Connie.
45
00:01:25,038 --> 00:01:26,805
Her body would not stop.
46
00:01:26,806 --> 00:01:27,939
Oh, Connie's dead?
47
00:01:27,973 --> 00:01:29,440
I'm so sorry.
48
00:01:29,474 --> 00:01:30,875
Well, what are you up to right now?
49
00:01:30,909 --> 00:01:33,044
[Whispering] Stop it.
50
00:01:33,045 --> 00:01:36,213
Okay. Don't beat yourself up.
It's a numbers game.
51
00:01:36,247 --> 00:01:38,282
And you've only called, like,
what, 25 girls?
52
00:01:38,316 --> 00:01:40,017
They're just afraid if
they come over here right now,
53
00:01:40,018 --> 00:01:41,185
they're gonna get attached.
54
00:01:41,219 --> 00:01:43,955
You know, the pheromones,
et cetera. - Hmm.
55
00:01:43,989 --> 00:01:45,522
[Phone vibrating]
56
00:01:45,557 --> 00:01:47,558
Vanessa. Vanessa.
57
00:01:47,559 --> 00:01:49,960
Hey, Danny.
Hey, Vanessa. What's going on?
58
00:01:49,994 --> 00:01:51,260
Got any plans tonight?
59
00:01:51,261 --> 00:01:53,463
Want to come over
and rekindle the old flame?
60
00:01:53,497 --> 00:01:55,498
(Vanessa) Sure, hon,
but I should warn you...
61
00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:58,001
My rates have gone up.
62
00:01:58,002 --> 00:01:59,769
That was a wrong number.
63
00:02:00,658 --> 00:02:05,255
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
64
00:02:07,277 --> 00:02:08,611
Good morning, colleagues.
65
00:02:08,612 --> 00:02:10,545
Danny, I brought your
favorite breakfast... oatmeal,
66
00:02:10,580 --> 00:02:12,114
with a side of brown sugar.
67
00:02:12,148 --> 00:02:15,450
And by "brown sugar,"
I, of course, mean my butt.
68
00:02:15,485 --> 00:02:17,753
Peter?
Where's Danny?
69
00:02:17,787 --> 00:02:19,321
Oh, you didn't hear?
70
00:02:19,322 --> 00:02:20,589
He came into his office this morning,
71
00:02:20,590 --> 00:02:21,991
and he was all sweaty and cranky.
72
00:02:21,992 --> 00:02:23,291
So I was like, "business as usual."
73
00:02:23,326 --> 00:02:24,994
- Yeah.
- So I start telling him about my weekend,
74
00:02:25,028 --> 00:02:27,096
how I got blown off
by four separate girls
75
00:02:27,130 --> 00:02:28,597
who all used the same excuse,
76
00:02:28,631 --> 00:02:30,132
which was, "I'm going back
to graduate school,"
77
00:02:30,166 --> 00:02:31,766
which if you don't mind me saying,
78
00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:33,602
I don't know how that precludes
you from dating someone.
79
00:02:33,636 --> 00:02:35,303
Anyway, he passed out.
80
00:02:35,304 --> 00:02:36,704
And I was like, "Danny, rude.
81
00:02:36,705 --> 00:02:38,006
I'm telling you about my weekend."
82
00:02:38,040 --> 00:02:39,407
Wait, wait, wait.
What? What happened to Danny?
83
00:02:39,442 --> 00:02:42,210
He has viral meningitis...
Brain fever.
84
00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:43,245
What?
85
00:02:44,447 --> 00:02:45,947
Oh, my God.
Danny?
86
00:02:45,981 --> 00:02:47,815
I was so worried about you.
87
00:02:47,850 --> 00:02:49,350
You can't die.
You have so much to live for.
88
00:02:49,351 --> 00:02:50,884
My birthday's coming up.
89
00:02:50,885 --> 00:02:52,286
We haven't even talked
about what you're gonna get me.
90
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:53,820
[Clears throat] Dr. L.
91
00:02:53,821 --> 00:02:56,490
Richie, you remember Mindy,
my coworker.
92
00:02:56,491 --> 00:02:57,491
Coworker?
93
00:02:57,526 --> 00:02:59,026
Yeah.
94
00:02:59,027 --> 00:03:00,628
Okay. Yes.
95
00:03:00,662 --> 00:03:02,196
Hello, Richard.
96
00:03:02,230 --> 00:03:03,730
Don't worry, Dr. L,
I'm taking good care of him.
97
00:03:03,731 --> 00:03:05,432
I even brought him Mr. Neck.
98
00:03:05,433 --> 00:03:07,334
She doesn't need to know about that.
99
00:03:07,335 --> 00:03:08,468
I don't know what that is.
100
00:03:08,502 --> 00:03:10,537
[Clears throat]
101
00:03:10,571 --> 00:03:12,372
Richie, could you got find me
the white nurse?
102
00:03:12,373 --> 00:03:13,807
Uh, sure.
I'll be right back.
103
00:03:13,841 --> 00:03:15,676
Thanks, Richie.
104
00:03:15,710 --> 00:03:17,778
He'll be gone for hours.
What the hell, man?
105
00:03:17,812 --> 00:03:19,479
I'm a coworker all of a sudden?
106
00:03:19,513 --> 00:03:20,881
Do I look like Morgan to you?
107
00:03:20,882 --> 00:03:22,015
'Cause people tell me that,
and I do not like it.
108
00:03:22,050 --> 00:03:23,650
What?
I didn't mean anything by it.
109
00:03:23,651 --> 00:03:25,518
We're just... you know,
we're not having sex.
110
00:03:25,519 --> 00:03:27,953
So, technically, we're not... dating.
111
00:03:27,988 --> 00:03:30,790
Oh, I see how it is.
Speaking of which...
112
00:03:30,824 --> 00:03:34,494
You know what would make me feel
a lot better right now?
113
00:03:34,528 --> 00:03:36,128
Yeah, cannoli.
I brought you some,
114
00:03:36,129 --> 00:03:37,597
but I actually ate them
on the way over here.
115
00:03:37,598 --> 00:03:38,764
I'm so sorry.
116
00:03:38,799 --> 00:03:40,533
No, not a cannoli, a little...
[Clicks tongue]
117
00:03:40,568 --> 00:03:41,801
What?
118
00:03:41,835 --> 00:03:43,536
Boop, boop.
119
00:03:43,571 --> 00:03:44,837
- Danny!
- Just...
120
00:03:44,838 --> 00:03:46,005
Absolutely not!
121
00:03:46,006 --> 00:03:47,173
First of all, we're in public.
122
00:03:47,174 --> 00:03:48,440
Second of all, sex with me right now
123
00:03:48,441 --> 00:03:49,742
would kill you in this state.
124
00:03:49,743 --> 00:03:50,910
Your heart-rate monitor would be like,
125
00:03:50,911 --> 00:03:52,311
"beep-beep, beep-beep,
beep-beep, beep..."
126
00:03:52,312 --> 00:03:53,512
[Imitates explosion]
127
00:03:53,513 --> 00:03:55,081
No, no, we don't have
to have sex, just like...
128
00:03:55,082 --> 00:03:57,083
Just graze it.
I'm not gonna graze it!
129
00:03:57,084 --> 00:03:58,450
I'm so sick.
130
00:03:58,451 --> 00:04:00,152
I know. This is your brain fever
making you a real pervert.
131
00:04:00,153 --> 00:04:01,721
Yeah, it's making me cra...
It's making me so horny.
132
00:04:01,722 --> 00:04:03,055
I have something better than sex...
133
00:04:03,090 --> 00:04:05,191
Bridget Jones's diary...
My favorite book.
134
00:04:05,192 --> 00:04:07,892
[Sighs] Whenever I'm sick,
I read it, and I feel better.
135
00:04:07,893 --> 00:04:09,060
I thought I would read it to you.
136
00:04:09,095 --> 00:04:10,529
That's great.
No, I'm... I'm good.
137
00:04:10,563 --> 00:04:12,431
I'm good on the Bridget Jones thing.
138
00:04:12,465 --> 00:04:16,067
I'm just gonna watch the, uh...
The hospital info channel.
139
00:04:16,102 --> 00:04:18,270
Do you know they have a business
center on the fourth floor?
140
00:04:18,271 --> 00:04:19,271
- Hmm.
- [Phone chirping]
141
00:04:32,551 --> 00:04:34,218
Yeah.
142
00:04:34,219 --> 00:04:35,586
- (Mindy) What?
- (Peter) Come on, come on, come on!
143
00:04:35,621 --> 00:04:36,754
- What?
- Come on, come on!
144
00:04:36,755 --> 00:04:38,055
Why did I have to run here?
145
00:04:38,056 --> 00:04:39,523
I got very sweaty
on the way over here.
146
00:04:39,524 --> 00:04:42,192
- Come here.
- Okay.
147
00:04:42,193 --> 00:04:44,862
It was just a normal day for me,
like every other day...
148
00:04:44,863 --> 00:04:47,764
Eat my lunch at my desk,
catch up on some pornography...
149
00:04:47,798 --> 00:04:49,065
What?
150
00:04:49,066 --> 00:04:50,667
When I came across this.
151
00:04:50,668 --> 00:04:52,068
[Sensual trumpet music playing]
152
00:04:52,069 --> 00:04:53,703
What...
You should not be do...
153
00:04:53,738 --> 00:04:55,004
(Mindy) Oh,
you've ruined me for other men.
154
00:04:55,005 --> 00:04:56,239
Does that make you feel good?
155
00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:58,241
- (Man) Mm-hmm.
- Oh, my God.
156
00:04:58,276 --> 00:05:00,042
I don't think I'll ever be able
to have sex with another guy.
157
00:05:00,043 --> 00:05:01,110
Oh, my God!
158
00:05:01,111 --> 00:05:02,312
That's exactly what you say
in the video.
159
00:05:02,313 --> 00:05:04,512
(Mindy) Okay, that's really good.
160
00:05:06,122 --> 00:05:07,289
(Peter) What on earth
were you thinking?
161
00:05:07,290 --> 00:05:08,723
Making a sex tape?
162
00:05:08,724 --> 00:05:10,792
Don't you know that means
that creeps like me
163
00:05:10,793 --> 00:05:12,994
are gonna watch it?
Oh, my God. Peter...
164
00:05:12,995 --> 00:05:16,365
Please promise me that you
have not gratified yourself
165
00:05:16,366 --> 00:05:17,832
while you were watching this.
166
00:05:17,833 --> 00:05:19,901
- Oh, my God!
- No, I didn't.
167
00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:21,570
Peter, can you please
be more convincing than that?
168
00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:23,638
Just don't look up guiltily!
169
00:05:23,639 --> 00:05:25,073
Look me in the eye
and tell me you didn't do it.
170
00:05:25,074 --> 00:05:26,340
I didn't?
171
00:05:26,341 --> 00:05:27,641
Oh, God.
172
00:05:27,642 --> 00:05:28,709
Oh, God.
173
00:05:28,710 --> 00:05:30,344
Look, I know this is bad
174
00:05:30,345 --> 00:05:32,380
for the whole practice.
175
00:05:32,381 --> 00:05:33,981
But I got to say,
176
00:05:33,982 --> 00:05:35,649
I've never met
a real pornography actor
177
00:05:35,650 --> 00:05:36,817
up close and personal.
178
00:05:36,818 --> 00:05:38,052
I'm kind of geeking out.
179
00:05:38,053 --> 00:05:39,554
I can't...
I need to lie on the floor.
180
00:05:39,555 --> 00:05:41,522
Can I ask you a question?
181
00:05:41,523 --> 00:05:43,524
You know, what was
with that trumpet music?
182
00:05:43,525 --> 00:05:46,426
That was just my next-door
neighbor practicing his trumpet.
183
00:05:46,427 --> 00:05:48,728
It's actually kind of beautiful
if you listen to it.
184
00:05:48,729 --> 00:05:50,464
There is a very spirited debate
about that
185
00:05:50,465 --> 00:05:52,165
in the comment section.
186
00:05:52,166 --> 00:05:54,367
The comment section?
187
00:05:54,368 --> 00:05:56,403
- Well, yeah, it's a video online.
- Okay.
188
00:05:56,404 --> 00:05:59,106
Verified user bro-b/gyn says,
189
00:05:59,107 --> 00:06:01,341
"hey, I work with her."
190
00:06:01,342 --> 00:06:03,110
I told you I was geeking out.
191
00:06:03,111 --> 00:06:05,044
I gave it three stars.
192
00:06:05,045 --> 00:06:06,846
My life is over.
193
00:06:06,847 --> 00:06:08,681
My professional life is over,
and my personal life is over.
194
00:06:08,682 --> 00:06:10,449
This is horrifying, Peter!
195
00:06:10,450 --> 00:06:13,185
And the worst part is
I just started...
196
00:06:13,186 --> 00:06:15,121
Hanging out with this guy,
197
00:06:15,122 --> 00:06:18,290
a really special guy
that I've liked for a long time.
198
00:06:18,291 --> 00:06:19,926
Well, that's great, right?
199
00:06:19,927 --> 00:06:23,062
No, if he sees this,
I know it's gonna be over.
200
00:06:23,063 --> 00:06:24,730
This whole time I've been telling him
201
00:06:24,731 --> 00:06:26,265
I want to, like, "take it slow."
202
00:06:26,266 --> 00:06:29,168
- That doesn't sound like you.
- I know!
203
00:06:31,671 --> 00:06:33,572
I tell you what...
I can help.
204
00:06:33,573 --> 00:06:34,573
Really?
205
00:06:34,574 --> 00:06:36,041
In order to squash this,
206
00:06:36,042 --> 00:06:37,576
we need to go right to the source.
207
00:06:37,577 --> 00:06:39,778
No. No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
208
00:06:39,812 --> 00:06:41,213
- Oh, yeah.
- No, no, no!
209
00:06:41,248 --> 00:06:43,115
- Yep.
- Peter, please. I can't.
210
00:06:43,150 --> 00:06:45,250
(Woman on radio)
92.5
211
00:06:45,251 --> 00:06:46,551
all right, let's look here.
212
00:06:46,585 --> 00:06:48,754
Oh, the gums are looking nice.
213
00:06:48,788 --> 00:06:51,056
Yeah, you'd never know
they came from a cadaver.
214
00:06:51,090 --> 00:06:52,557
Looks good.
215
00:06:52,591 --> 00:06:54,559
Very nice, Caroline.
216
00:06:54,593 --> 00:06:57,029
What are you doing here?
217
00:06:57,063 --> 00:06:59,564
- Tom.
- Mindy!
218
00:06:59,598 --> 00:07:01,432
I need to speak to you
about an urgent matter.
219
00:07:01,467 --> 00:07:02,768
Look, Mindy, we're not dating anymore.
220
00:07:02,769 --> 00:07:03,969
So I can't give you free toothbrushes.
221
00:07:04,003 --> 00:07:05,470
I already got my free toothbrushes.
222
00:07:05,471 --> 00:07:06,737
So joke's on you.
Come on.
223
00:07:06,772 --> 00:07:08,306
Just hold on a moment.
224
00:07:08,307 --> 00:07:09,440
Come on, come on!
225
00:07:09,475 --> 00:07:10,542
Faster!
Move it or lose it.
226
00:07:10,576 --> 00:07:11,976
Let's go.
227
00:07:12,010 --> 00:07:13,911
Hey, why is our sex tape
on the Internet?
228
00:07:13,945 --> 00:07:15,746
I-I had nothing to do with that.
229
00:07:15,781 --> 00:07:17,815
I swear on my mother's grave,
230
00:07:17,849 --> 00:07:20,051
I had nothing to do with that.
231
00:07:20,052 --> 00:07:21,585
No, wait.
I...
232
00:07:21,586 --> 00:07:22,887
I had something to do with that.
233
00:07:22,921 --> 00:07:24,621
Oh, my gosh.
234
00:07:24,656 --> 00:07:26,623
I lent it to my brother
when he got divorced.
235
00:07:26,658 --> 00:07:28,013
- What?
- If it makes any difference,
236
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,193
it really helped.
237
00:07:29,194 --> 00:07:30,394
He had a bad case of the blues.
238
00:07:30,428 --> 00:07:32,029
[Clears throat] I am very sorry.
239
00:07:32,030 --> 00:07:33,330
This is Peter, my colleague.
This is Tom.
240
00:07:33,364 --> 00:07:34,363
Tom, Peter.
241
00:07:34,365 --> 00:07:35,732
Super disappointed in you, man.
242
00:07:35,766 --> 00:07:36,966
Yes.
243
00:07:37,001 --> 00:07:38,302
I am also pretty psyched to meet you.
244
00:07:38,303 --> 00:07:39,469
You're my new favorite male porn star.
245
00:07:39,504 --> 00:07:40,870
[Whispering] Shut up.
246
00:07:40,871 --> 00:07:43,507
Look, I just started dating
my dental assistant, okay?
247
00:07:43,508 --> 00:07:45,942
I don't need this. We're coming
up on our two-month anniversary,
248
00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:47,110
so stop it with the porn...
249
00:07:47,111 --> 00:07:48,945
Hey...
We're out of gauze.
250
00:07:48,979 --> 00:07:50,347
Should I order gauze?
251
00:07:50,381 --> 00:07:53,584
Yeah, angel,
do whatever you want, okay?
252
00:07:53,585 --> 00:07:55,385
Boop.
253
00:07:58,989 --> 00:08:00,456
[Sighs]
254
00:08:00,457 --> 00:08:01,858
I mean, how am I supposed
to get anything done
255
00:08:01,859 --> 00:08:03,093
with that in my face all day?
256
00:08:03,127 --> 00:08:04,627
Okay.
257
00:08:04,661 --> 00:08:05,995
Look, okay,
258
00:08:05,996 --> 00:08:07,530
I'll destroy that tape
the minute I get home, okay?
259
00:08:07,564 --> 00:08:09,232
- Thank you.
- No way, buddy.
260
00:08:09,233 --> 00:08:10,600
You gotta bring that tape to Mindy.
261
00:08:10,601 --> 00:08:12,481
No man in history
has ever destroyed a sex tape.
262
00:08:12,502 --> 00:08:14,637
Uh-huh.
Thank you, my slimy friend.
263
00:08:14,638 --> 00:08:17,473
That's a good point.
You are not destroying it.
264
00:08:17,507 --> 00:08:19,108
You're gonna bring it to my office,
265
00:08:19,142 --> 00:08:21,543
place it on my desk, and you're
gonna close the door behind you,
266
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:24,046
- today.
- I'll do it today.
267
00:08:24,047 --> 00:08:25,914
And what if Margo found out?
268
00:08:25,915 --> 00:08:29,384
I shot that before
she turned me super Christian.
269
00:08:29,418 --> 00:08:31,787
Hey, who's uncomfortable?
270
00:08:31,788 --> 00:08:33,288
Okay, this is great.
271
00:08:33,289 --> 00:08:34,689
You know what?
272
00:08:34,690 --> 00:08:36,725
I'll just destroy that tape
before anyone important sees it.
273
00:08:36,726 --> 00:08:38,693
Mindy, it's on the Internet.
274
00:08:38,694 --> 00:08:40,895
We have to go to sploders.com
and get them to take it down.
275
00:08:40,929 --> 00:08:41,996
No, no, no.
276
00:08:41,997 --> 00:08:43,430
I'm not gonna go
to some seedy warehouse
277
00:08:43,431 --> 00:08:44,866
where they make porns, okay?
278
00:08:44,867 --> 00:08:46,367
And have to deal
with some gross slime-os.
279
00:08:46,368 --> 00:08:48,502
I'm not gonna do that!
You're being pretty close-minded
280
00:08:48,503 --> 00:08:50,371
for a girl who just got
her start in porn.
281
00:08:50,405 --> 00:08:51,873
Okay.
282
00:08:51,907 --> 00:08:54,208
Let me ask you something,
a little advice...
283
00:08:54,243 --> 00:08:55,910
In the love department.
284
00:08:55,944 --> 00:08:56,978
Oh, okay.
285
00:08:57,012 --> 00:09:01,382
My colleague Mindy and I...
We, uh...
286
00:09:01,383 --> 00:09:03,850
We've been, you know...
287
00:09:03,851 --> 00:09:05,419
- Kissing.
- Oh!
288
00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:06,687
But just kissing.
289
00:09:06,688 --> 00:09:08,389
She doesn't want to have
sex with me yet.
290
00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:09,856
I mean, she's no prude.
291
00:09:09,857 --> 00:09:12,259
You know, I've seen her number
on two different bathroom walls
292
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,361
in her own handwriting.
293
00:09:14,362 --> 00:09:17,298
I don't know.
You know, Richie...
294
00:09:17,299 --> 00:09:18,666
Maybe she doesn't like me?
295
00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:20,966
Come on.
Of course she likes you.
296
00:09:20,967 --> 00:09:25,672
Maybe she just wants to take it
a little slow because...
297
00:09:25,673 --> 00:09:27,006
She knows how judgmental you can be.
298
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:28,274
What do you mean?
I'm not judgmental.
299
00:09:28,275 --> 00:09:29,676
No, you're right.
You're right.
300
00:09:29,677 --> 00:09:31,477
Hey, did I tell you that
I'm thinking of leasing a car
301
00:09:31,478 --> 00:09:32,945
instead of buying?
302
00:09:32,946 --> 00:09:35,080
Oh, yeah, that's great, Richie.
That's real great.
303
00:09:35,081 --> 00:09:37,149
Have fun not building up
a credit history.
304
00:09:37,150 --> 00:09:38,351
Are you kidding me?
305
00:09:38,352 --> 00:09:40,386
You know what? Next time
I buy you a Suze Orman book,
306
00:09:40,387 --> 00:09:42,054
I'm gonna throw it
in the trash myse...
307
00:09:42,088 --> 00:09:43,189
Okay, I get it.
308
00:09:43,190 --> 00:09:44,756
You're testing me.
You're testing me.
309
00:09:44,791 --> 00:09:46,926
Danny, if Mindy wants
to take things slow,
310
00:09:46,927 --> 00:09:48,660
you have to accept that...
311
00:09:48,661 --> 00:09:51,230
Just like you're gonna want her
to accept, one day,
312
00:09:51,264 --> 00:09:53,598
that you don't like turning on
the heat in the winter.
313
00:09:53,633 --> 00:09:55,634
Why, to heat up a drawer
full of unused sweaters?
314
00:09:55,668 --> 00:09:57,069
You want to get warm,
315
00:09:57,070 --> 00:10:00,139
get on the floor
and do some push-ups, okay?
316
00:10:00,173 --> 00:10:01,806
Okay, look, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
317
00:10:04,009 --> 00:10:07,712
(Woman on radio)
92.5
318
00:10:07,746 --> 00:10:08,880
sorry to keep you waiting.
319
00:10:08,914 --> 00:10:10,614
Spring is our horny season.
320
00:10:10,649 --> 00:10:12,250
- Of course.
- By the way...
321
00:10:12,284 --> 00:10:14,418
I'm a big fan of your work.
322
00:10:14,453 --> 00:10:16,821
Oh, God, kill me.
323
00:10:16,856 --> 00:10:19,891
So we understand you would
like us to take down your video,
324
00:10:19,892 --> 00:10:21,559
and we hear you.
325
00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:23,394
Integrity is the Hallmark of Sploders
326
00:10:23,395 --> 00:10:25,329
and the sploders family
of porn websites.
327
00:10:25,364 --> 00:10:27,398
Oh, cool.
So you'll do it.
328
00:10:27,432 --> 00:10:29,199
Sploders is a family business.
329
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:32,570
In 1922, our grandfather
Irwin Fleischman
330
00:10:32,571 --> 00:10:34,405
arrived at Ellis Island,
331
00:10:34,406 --> 00:10:36,039
took one look
at the Statue of Liberty,
332
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:39,343
and thought, "I wonder what
she's got going on under there."
333
00:10:39,378 --> 00:10:41,945
- And sploders was born.
- Wow.
334
00:10:41,980 --> 00:10:45,148
Grandpa believed you shouldn't
have to go to the museum
335
00:10:45,149 --> 00:10:46,683
to see a naked woman.
336
00:10:46,684 --> 00:10:49,819
Miss you, pop-pop!
Horny freak.
337
00:10:49,820 --> 00:10:53,490
Unfortunately,
we can't oblige your request.
338
00:10:53,491 --> 00:10:55,359
You see, as it turns out,
there is a growing market
339
00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:56,927
for Indian BBWs.
340
00:10:56,961 --> 00:10:58,128
Wait.
341
00:10:58,162 --> 00:10:59,596
What's a BBW?
342
00:10:59,630 --> 00:11:01,498
Oh, you... you don't have
to explain that for her.
343
00:11:01,532 --> 00:11:03,199
Oh, I have to guess it.
344
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:06,936
Okay. Um, is it, like,
"brainy birdlike wife" material?
345
00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:08,371
No, it means "big beautiful woman."
346
00:11:08,405 --> 00:11:10,606
What... the hell?
347
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,608
"Beautiful woman" is in there.
348
00:11:12,642 --> 00:11:14,710
But also "big." Are you kidding me?
349
00:11:14,744 --> 00:11:17,146
Look at these wrists.
Look at how dainty they are!
350
00:11:17,147 --> 00:11:20,016
They can barely hold up the
enormous calzones that I eat.
351
00:11:20,050 --> 00:11:22,151
The problem is here, guys,
352
00:11:22,152 --> 00:11:24,786
that there aren't very many
Indian women in this country
353
00:11:24,787 --> 00:11:26,321
that have the kind of loose morals
354
00:11:26,322 --> 00:11:28,723
that allow them
to star in these videos.
355
00:11:28,724 --> 00:11:30,058
Most of them become doctors.
356
00:11:30,092 --> 00:11:31,126
Well, I am a doctor!
357
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:32,160
Right.
Right.
358
00:11:32,161 --> 00:11:33,561
We're both gynecologists.
359
00:11:33,595 --> 00:11:36,331
We're all gynecologists in this room.
360
00:11:36,365 --> 00:11:39,634
Look, from one porn aficionado
to a couple others,
361
00:11:39,635 --> 00:11:43,471
maybe you could just do us a solid.
362
00:11:43,505 --> 00:11:45,205
Wish we could.
363
00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:46,807
But if we took down a video
364
00:11:46,841 --> 00:11:48,309
every time someone didn't like it,
365
00:11:48,310 --> 00:11:50,077
we wouldn't be rich
beyond our wildest dreams.
366
00:11:50,111 --> 00:11:52,746
Did I mention my house has four pools?
367
00:12:04,194 --> 00:12:07,229
This is just typical me, you know?
368
00:12:07,230 --> 00:12:09,098
I screwed something up
before I even got a chance
369
00:12:09,099 --> 00:12:10,597
to screw it up.
370
00:12:10,598 --> 00:12:12,534
I guess I'll just be single forever.
371
00:12:12,535 --> 00:12:15,603
Hey, guys? I need to tell you
a story real quick.
372
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:17,071
When I was in college,
373
00:12:17,072 --> 00:12:19,073
I could've taken pictures
of every hot tri delt
374
00:12:19,074 --> 00:12:20,441
at the Dartmouth nude Olympics.
375
00:12:20,442 --> 00:12:21,709
Did I?
You bet I did.
376
00:12:21,744 --> 00:12:23,010
Did I put 'em online?
377
00:12:23,045 --> 00:12:24,712
Tried, couldn't figure it out.
378
00:12:24,747 --> 00:12:26,848
Tried again, still having trouble.
379
00:12:26,849 --> 00:12:27,982
Tried a third time,
380
00:12:28,016 --> 00:12:29,583
still was having problems.
381
00:12:29,584 --> 00:12:30,752
I bought a firewire cable...
382
00:12:30,786 --> 00:12:32,220
I'm gonna stop you right there.
383
00:12:32,221 --> 00:12:33,687
- Kind of a long story.
- Yep.
384
00:12:33,688 --> 00:12:34,888
You went to Dartmouth?
385
00:12:34,922 --> 00:12:36,590
Yeah, I'm a d-bag.
Are you a d-bag?
386
00:12:36,625 --> 00:12:38,859
Class of '96, class of '98.
387
00:12:38,893 --> 00:12:40,060
(Peter) So what do you guys say?
388
00:12:40,094 --> 00:12:41,895
For the big green?
389
00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,997
Okay, but only for big green.
390
00:12:44,031 --> 00:12:45,899
(All) Wah-hoo-wah!
391
00:12:45,933 --> 00:12:47,000
Wahoo-wah!
392
00:12:47,034 --> 00:12:48,602
That's not how we did that.
393
00:12:48,637 --> 00:12:50,904
Ms. Lahiri, before you go...
394
00:12:50,905 --> 00:12:52,806
Would you consider starring
in a new project for us?
395
00:12:52,807 --> 00:12:54,340
We'll pay you $300,000.
396
00:12:54,375 --> 00:12:58,044
I'm sorry, three hundo-thundo
just to flash Vince and Owen?
397
00:12:58,079 --> 00:13:00,847
Guy, she just begged you
to take down her sex tape.
398
00:13:00,848 --> 00:13:03,383
You really think
she'd stoop that low to...
399
00:13:03,384 --> 00:13:05,152
- Mindy?
- You're right. You're right.
400
00:13:05,153 --> 00:13:06,319
Of course not.
401
00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:08,721
It just... it seems like
such easy money.
402
00:13:08,756 --> 00:13:11,091
- Dr. C. hey!
- Yeah.
403
00:13:11,092 --> 00:13:12,492
Don't rest so much.
It's not good for you.
404
00:13:12,493 --> 00:13:13,559
You got to wake up.
405
00:13:13,594 --> 00:13:15,395
Morgan, what are you...
What are you doing?
406
00:13:15,429 --> 00:13:17,297
I have a special delivery
for my best guy friend.
407
00:13:17,331 --> 00:13:19,899
That's nice.
[Groans]
408
00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:21,100
What about the balloons?
409
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,269
- These are for my own personal use.
- Okay.
410
00:13:23,270 --> 00:13:24,771
But Dr. L's actually
gonna spend the night here,
411
00:13:24,772 --> 00:13:26,772
and she asked me to drop off
some of her work.
412
00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,207
- Very sweet...
- Mm-hmm.
413
00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:29,909
- And professional.
- Yeah.
414
00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:31,743
So, uh...
415
00:13:31,744 --> 00:13:33,312
You didn't actually bring me anything?
416
00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:36,048
I could sing you a song
so you feel better.
417
00:13:36,082 --> 00:13:37,283
No.
418
00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:38,918
Can you sing me a song
so I feel better?
419
00:13:38,952 --> 00:13:40,152
Good-bye, Morgan.
420
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,486
[Sighs]
421
00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:43,622
I can't lose you.
You're not gonna lose me.
422
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,157
- You could die.
- Not gonna die.
423
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:47,959
You might.
Thanks for coming by.
424
00:13:47,993 --> 00:13:49,494
You're one in a million, Castellano.
425
00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:53,064
[Door opens, closes]
426
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:02,474
[Sighs]
427
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:03,642
(Peter) What floor is Danny on?
428
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,210
Five.
But you know what, Peter?
429
00:14:05,211 --> 00:14:06,577
After defeating that porn empire,
430
00:14:06,578 --> 00:14:08,379
- I think we should take the stairs.
- Take the stairs?
431
00:14:08,380 --> 00:14:11,649
Mindy, they had to airlift you
out of a 5k fun run for cancer.
432
00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:13,517
We're taking the elevator.
433
00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:19,690
Where do you put the tape in?
434
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:21,392
[Elevator bell dings]
435
00:14:21,393 --> 00:14:23,361
Okay, um, I'm mad
that you brought that up.
436
00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:24,695
You know that's
a sensitive subject with me.
437
00:14:24,730 --> 00:14:27,097
I feel like I can get airlifted
once in a while.
438
00:14:27,131 --> 00:14:28,165
Eject...
That works.
439
00:14:28,199 --> 00:14:29,333
Yeah.
440
00:14:29,367 --> 00:14:30,700
[Elevator bell dings]
441
00:14:30,701 --> 00:14:32,982
Jillian Michaels says that
these are wasted opportunities.
442
00:14:33,004 --> 00:14:34,504
Jillian who?
443
00:14:36,074 --> 00:14:37,307
Bingo.
444
00:14:41,212 --> 00:14:42,346
[Elevator bell dings]
445
00:14:42,347 --> 00:14:44,281
Okay, you win.
Let's take the stairs.
446
00:14:44,282 --> 00:14:45,715
[Knock at door]
447
00:14:45,716 --> 00:14:48,150
(Tom) Mindy.
448
00:14:48,151 --> 00:14:50,319
(Mindy) Who's Mindy?
I'm Cody, mister.
449
00:14:50,354 --> 00:14:52,821
I'm selling cookies,
cookies to turn you on.
450
00:14:52,822 --> 00:14:54,323
- You're dirty.
- It's happening.
451
00:14:54,324 --> 00:14:55,624
[Both moaning]
452
00:14:55,658 --> 00:14:57,659
No! No, no. Don't do that.
Don't do that.
453
00:14:57,694 --> 00:14:59,561
Don't do that!
Don't do that to him!
454
00:14:59,562 --> 00:15:00,863
Oh, my...
455
00:15:00,898 --> 00:15:03,799
You know, my sophomore year,
meningitis tore through my frat.
456
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:05,067
Mm-hmm.
457
00:15:05,068 --> 00:15:06,769
We thought we were hungover
for the first week.
458
00:15:06,770 --> 00:15:08,604
If queef's dad hadn't been
the surgeon general,
459
00:15:08,605 --> 00:15:09,804
we all would've been nips up.
460
00:15:09,805 --> 00:15:11,406
No kidding.
461
00:15:11,407 --> 00:15:12,573
Wait.
462
00:15:12,574 --> 00:15:14,742
[Distant sensual trumpet music plays]
463
00:15:14,743 --> 00:15:16,477
Oh, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
464
00:15:16,512 --> 00:15:18,179
Ahhhh!
465
00:15:18,214 --> 00:15:19,680
- Oh, my God.
- (Tom) You are dirty!
466
00:15:19,715 --> 00:15:21,349
[Yells]
467
00:15:21,384 --> 00:15:23,018
Ah, God!
I can't unsee this.
468
00:15:23,052 --> 00:15:25,020
Mindy, I've never
done this before. Hey!
469
00:15:25,054 --> 00:15:27,555
That's burned in my retina!
Ah!
470
00:15:27,589 --> 00:15:29,489
Oh, Tom, you own me.
471
00:15:29,524 --> 00:15:32,026
Get away from her with that thing! Oh!
472
00:15:32,060 --> 00:15:33,593
No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
473
00:15:33,628 --> 00:15:35,662
Why would you give this
to me, you sicko?
474
00:15:35,696 --> 00:15:37,731
Danny, I gave it to Tom,
like, ten years ago.
475
00:15:37,732 --> 00:15:39,033
- It means nothing.
- Oh, yeah?
476
00:15:39,034 --> 00:15:40,700
Were you taking it slow
when you made this with Tom?
477
00:15:40,701 --> 00:15:42,702
Or is this medium speed for you?
478
00:15:42,703 --> 00:15:43,703
No, that's faster than medium speed.
479
00:15:43,738 --> 00:15:44,738
Do not look at that!
480
00:15:44,739 --> 00:15:47,141
It was the 2000s, okay?
481
00:15:47,142 --> 00:15:49,342
You were kind of a loser
if you didn't have a sex tape.
482
00:15:49,343 --> 00:15:50,543
It's disgusting.
483
00:15:50,577 --> 00:15:52,312
God! Why did I even
have to look at that?
484
00:15:52,313 --> 00:15:53,947
My eyes hurt.
Why do you care?
485
00:15:57,217 --> 00:15:58,217
What?
486
00:15:58,218 --> 00:15:59,585
(Peter) I don't understand.
487
00:15:59,586 --> 00:16:00,653
Why do you care so much, Danny?
488
00:16:00,654 --> 00:16:02,888
I'm just...
489
00:16:02,889 --> 00:16:04,757
Worried that this tape
isn't good for the practice.
490
00:16:04,791 --> 00:16:06,159
The practice?
491
00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:08,027
I've done way worse things
to the practice.
492
00:16:08,062 --> 00:16:09,429
Last week I called in a bomb threat
493
00:16:09,430 --> 00:16:10,596
'cause I was too hungover to come in.
494
00:16:10,630 --> 00:16:13,131
That's so much worse, Danny, isn't it?
495
00:16:13,166 --> 00:16:14,633
All right, we'll talk
about that later.
496
00:16:14,634 --> 00:16:16,101
Let's talk about the tape, okay?
497
00:16:16,102 --> 00:16:17,703
- I don't...
- I feel like I'm missing something,
498
00:16:17,704 --> 00:16:19,905
'cause the only person
that should be, like, that upset
499
00:16:19,906 --> 00:16:21,440
is the new guy Mindy's dating.
500
00:16:21,441 --> 00:16:24,477
Wait.
Wait.
501
00:16:24,478 --> 00:16:25,478
Wait.
502
00:16:25,512 --> 00:16:26,645
- What?
- Wait.
503
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:27,713
What?
504
00:16:27,714 --> 00:16:28,848
Wait, wait, wait.
505
00:16:28,849 --> 00:16:30,382
Please stop repeating the word "wait"!
506
00:16:30,416 --> 00:16:32,417
Mindy, are you and Danny porking?
507
00:16:32,452 --> 00:16:34,719
Are you kidding me?
Us two?
508
00:16:34,753 --> 00:16:37,089
We are never gonna do that.
Ridiculous.
509
00:16:37,123 --> 00:16:38,656
That is unprofessional.
510
00:16:38,657 --> 00:16:40,125
We're not having sex, right, Mindy?
511
00:16:40,126 --> 00:16:41,226
Mm-hmm.
512
00:16:41,227 --> 00:16:42,427
Are you feeling all right, min?
513
00:16:42,428 --> 00:16:43,996
You're all, like, nauseous and fevery.
514
00:16:44,030 --> 00:16:46,030
You look like that morning
you tried to be a vegan.
515
00:16:46,032 --> 00:16:47,665
- Yeah, you're sweating.
- Is it guilt? Is it guilt sweats?
516
00:16:47,700 --> 00:16:50,234
Oh, my God.
You have Danny's meningitis!
517
00:16:50,268 --> 00:16:51,502
What?
518
00:16:51,503 --> 00:16:53,137
If she has meningitis,
it's her own strain.
519
00:16:53,138 --> 00:16:54,705
I had nothing to do with that.
520
00:16:54,706 --> 00:16:55,806
You two are porking!
521
00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:57,174
We're not.
We're coworkers.
522
00:16:57,209 --> 00:16:58,509
We're not.
Yeah, we're coworkers.
523
00:16:58,510 --> 00:17:00,311
And the reason I'm sweaty is that...
524
00:17:00,312 --> 00:17:01,479
I did crossfit earlier.
525
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:04,115
So I'm still kind of feeling
the... effects.
526
00:17:04,116 --> 00:17:06,250
Whoa!
Mindy?
527
00:17:06,251 --> 00:17:08,285
Her shirt's up.
Okay, don't look!
528
00:17:08,286 --> 00:17:09,516
Sorry.
Why do you care?
529
00:17:09,517 --> 00:17:11,108
Nurse!
530
00:17:12,928 --> 00:17:14,361
Hey, kiddo.
531
00:17:16,397 --> 00:17:17,564
You're looking a little sad.
532
00:17:17,599 --> 00:17:18,999
Want me to cheer you up?
533
00:17:19,034 --> 00:17:21,301
Do some Sheldon from Big Bang Theory?
534
00:17:21,302 --> 00:17:23,403
[Imitating sheldon] Bazinga! Hmm?
535
00:17:23,438 --> 00:17:25,172
I've never seen a woman before.
536
00:17:25,207 --> 00:17:27,208
Oh, Peter,
you know I love your Sheldon,
537
00:17:27,209 --> 00:17:29,009
but I'm not in the mood to laugh.
538
00:17:29,044 --> 00:17:31,478
You know, uh,
539
00:17:31,479 --> 00:17:33,614
if this new guy
you're hanging out with
540
00:17:33,615 --> 00:17:35,315
is gonna lose his shitake mushroom
541
00:17:35,316 --> 00:17:36,750
over a sex tape,
542
00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:38,318
then he's probably not
the right guy for you anyway.
543
00:17:38,353 --> 00:17:41,154
Well, the good news is...
544
00:17:41,155 --> 00:17:44,023
It seems like there is no guy anymore,
545
00:17:44,024 --> 00:17:45,892
and I'm just gonna be all alone...
546
00:17:45,893 --> 00:17:47,628
Just some oversexed creep
547
00:17:47,629 --> 00:17:49,529
who can't even make a good sex tape.
548
00:17:49,564 --> 00:17:51,565
Hey. That tape had a lot
going against it...
549
00:17:51,566 --> 00:17:54,800
I mean, bad lighting, female director.
550
00:17:54,834 --> 00:17:56,302
The worst part is...
551
00:17:56,303 --> 00:17:58,003
I didn't even like Tom that much,
552
00:17:58,037 --> 00:18:00,606
not nearly as much
as I like this new guy.
553
00:18:00,641 --> 00:18:02,408
And that's ruined.
554
00:18:04,911 --> 00:18:07,313
Well, I gotta go.
555
00:18:07,314 --> 00:18:10,115
I'm a total germaphobe.
556
00:18:10,150 --> 00:18:12,518
[Knock at door]
557
00:18:12,519 --> 00:18:15,153
- Hey, Danny.
- Move it.
558
00:18:15,187 --> 00:18:16,821
Oh, God, kill me.
559
00:18:16,822 --> 00:18:18,122
(Peter) I know you think that Mindy
560
00:18:18,157 --> 00:18:19,391
embarrassed the practice,
561
00:18:19,392 --> 00:18:21,793
but before you get
all judge-y Reinhold on her,
562
00:18:21,794 --> 00:18:23,361
listen to what Tom has to say.
563
00:18:23,362 --> 00:18:24,862
Okay, Margo's out in the hallway,
564
00:18:24,897 --> 00:18:27,565
so let's not talk about the sex tape.
565
00:18:27,566 --> 00:18:29,934
- You know, she thinks I'm a virgin.
- Okay, you know what?
566
00:18:29,935 --> 00:18:31,803
Hey, hey! What are you doing?
Trying to pull the plug.
567
00:18:31,837 --> 00:18:33,437
Stop it!
It's right there.
568
00:18:33,438 --> 00:18:34,805
Tom, tell him about the time
569
00:18:34,806 --> 00:18:36,473
that you spent together with Mindy.
570
00:18:36,474 --> 00:18:38,342
Why does he need to know that?
Why is that a deal?
571
00:18:38,376 --> 00:18:40,110
Margo, would you like to come in here
572
00:18:40,111 --> 00:18:41,445
and watch a movie?
That's not nice.
573
00:18:41,446 --> 00:18:43,414
You're not being nice.
No. Hey, back!
574
00:18:43,415 --> 00:18:46,183
Back, honey!
Not nice.
575
00:18:46,184 --> 00:18:47,785
That's not nice? You just
slammed the door in her face.
576
00:18:47,786 --> 00:18:49,986
Danny, listen, I don't think Mindy
577
00:18:49,987 --> 00:18:52,422
ever really liked me that much, okay?
578
00:18:52,423 --> 00:18:55,224
I think we did all
the freaky sex stuff because...
579
00:18:55,225 --> 00:18:57,293
We didn't like spending time
with each other.
580
00:18:57,294 --> 00:19:00,296
And when I say "freaky,"
I mean like really freaky.
581
00:19:00,297 --> 00:19:02,298
[Whispering]
Did you ever tape any of that?
582
00:19:02,299 --> 00:19:03,466
Most of it.
583
00:19:03,467 --> 00:19:04,701
What?
Where is this going?
584
00:19:04,702 --> 00:19:06,101
I'm just saying,
I think she would've dumped me
585
00:19:06,102 --> 00:19:07,403
after two weeks
if I didn't have such a huge...
586
00:19:07,404 --> 00:19:08,805
Okay, all right.
That's enough.
587
00:19:08,806 --> 00:19:10,639
Every time I see you,
you bring that up.
588
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:11,707
- Thank you.
- We good?
589
00:19:11,708 --> 00:19:13,041
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah. We're good.
590
00:19:13,042 --> 00:19:14,943
I don't know, this is...
591
00:19:14,944 --> 00:19:17,612
Okay, maybe that didn't go
as well as I thought.
592
00:19:17,613 --> 00:19:19,614
But Mindy didn't even like Tom.
593
00:19:19,615 --> 00:19:20,615
And if you could've seen
594
00:19:20,616 --> 00:19:21,983
the crazy lengths she went through
595
00:19:21,984 --> 00:19:24,786
to make sure your eyes
didn't get on that tape...
596
00:19:24,787 --> 00:19:28,022
I think it's because Mindy really...
597
00:19:28,023 --> 00:19:31,759
Respects the practice.
598
00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:35,929
Maybe she's even a little bit
in love with the practice.
599
00:19:35,930 --> 00:19:38,599
Maybe she even wants
to get boned by the practice.
600
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:39,667
Okay, thank you, Peter.
That's enough.
601
00:19:39,668 --> 00:19:41,702
Yeah.
602
00:19:41,703 --> 00:19:44,572
(Woman on TV) Veronica, why didn't
you come to my other talk show?
603
00:19:44,573 --> 00:19:45,873
(Veronica) Because my cat is sick.
604
00:19:45,874 --> 00:19:47,742
And Jessica said you didn't care!
605
00:19:47,743 --> 00:19:50,378
[Knock at door]
606
00:19:50,379 --> 00:19:52,011
Hey.
607
00:19:52,012 --> 00:19:53,980
Oh, hey.
608
00:19:53,981 --> 00:19:57,384
I just came down to borrow
your Bridget Jones's diary.
609
00:19:57,385 --> 00:19:59,486
I think I must've lost mine.
610
00:19:59,487 --> 00:20:01,621
Uh, it's over there.
611
00:20:01,622 --> 00:20:04,323
The nurse put it across the room
as punishment for pinching her.
612
00:20:04,324 --> 00:20:06,225
So...
613
00:20:06,226 --> 00:20:08,895
Enjoy it.
614
00:20:10,630 --> 00:20:12,398
You know...
615
00:20:12,399 --> 00:20:15,501
I was thinking that, uh...
616
00:20:17,336 --> 00:20:20,506
You know, maybe you were right.
617
00:20:20,507 --> 00:20:23,642
I think...
618
00:20:23,643 --> 00:20:25,977
I think I like that you want
to take things slow.
619
00:20:28,114 --> 00:20:30,681
Let's do slow.
620
00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:36,788
[Sighs]
621
00:20:36,789 --> 00:20:38,289
Chapter one.
622
00:20:38,290 --> 00:20:41,225
Can you do the voices?
623
00:20:41,226 --> 00:20:44,028
[Sighs] Okay.
624
00:20:44,029 --> 00:20:47,598
[British accent] "The last thing
on Earth I feel physically,
625
00:20:47,599 --> 00:20:50,434
"emotionally,
or mentally equipped to do
626
00:20:50,435 --> 00:20:53,537
"is to drive una
and Geoffrey Alconbury's
627
00:20:53,538 --> 00:20:56,740
New Year's Day turkey curry buffet..."
628
00:20:56,741 --> 00:20:58,809
Oh! That's where she meets Darcy.
629
00:20:58,810 --> 00:21:00,344
[Normal voice] Oh, yeah? Who's she?
630
00:21:00,345 --> 00:21:02,712
No, Mark Darcy...
Colin Firth.
631
00:21:02,713 --> 00:21:04,781
Oh. Okay.
Yep.
632
00:21:04,782 --> 00:21:07,217
I like that guy.
633
00:21:07,218 --> 00:21:09,018
[British accent] "'Oh, hello, darling.
634
00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:12,288
"I was just ringing to see
what you wanted for Christmas.'
635
00:21:12,289 --> 00:21:14,223
"'Christmas?'
636
00:21:14,224 --> 00:21:16,392
"'would you like a surprise, darling?'
637
00:21:16,393 --> 00:21:17,893
"'no!' I bellowed.
638
00:21:17,894 --> 00:21:19,528
"'Sorry. I mean...'
639
00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:22,165
"'I wondered if you'd like a set
of wheels for your suitcase.'
640
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:24,900
"'but I haven't got a suitcase.'
641
00:21:24,901 --> 00:21:26,735
"'why don't I get you
a little suitcase
642
00:21:26,736 --> 00:21:28,403
"'with wheels attached?
643
00:21:28,404 --> 00:21:30,506
You know, like an air hostess has.'"
644
00:21:30,507 --> 00:21:34,495
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
645
00:21:34,545 --> 00:21:39,095
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
46873
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