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1
00:00:00,281 --> 00:00:02,647
(Mindy) Christmastime
in New York City...
2
00:00:02,648 --> 00:00:05,674
Snow on the ground,
lights in the trees,
3
00:00:05,675 --> 00:00:07,633
and so many tourists
that it's nearly impossible
4
00:00:07,634 --> 00:00:09,801
to return a bra
to a department store.
5
00:00:09,802 --> 00:00:11,135
It's the time of year
when...
6
00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,805
Are you buying a tree or not? I am.
7
00:00:13,839 --> 00:00:15,640
I'll take
your biggest tree.
8
00:00:15,674 --> 00:00:18,175
$250.
What?
9
00:00:18,210 --> 00:00:20,612
For a dead tree?
10
00:00:20,613 --> 00:00:23,247
Okay, I'll take
that little sickly one.
11
00:00:25,183 --> 00:00:26,483
Merry Christmas.
12
00:00:26,484 --> 00:00:28,351
Merry Christmas,
and I'm gonna need some help
13
00:00:28,385 --> 00:00:29,486
bringing it
to my office.
14
00:00:29,487 --> 00:00:30,854
Is that something you do,
15
00:00:30,888 --> 00:00:32,856
or is it, like,
one of your Christmas elves?
16
00:00:32,890 --> 00:00:34,491
[Both chuckle]
17
00:00:34,525 --> 00:00:35,659
All right.
18
00:00:35,693 --> 00:00:37,227
Merry Christmas.
Thank you.
19
00:00:37,228 --> 00:00:39,696
(Woman)
Soon gonna jingle
20
00:00:39,731 --> 00:00:41,464
The bells that'll jingle
taxi! Taxi!
21
00:00:41,465 --> 00:00:42,865
All your troubles away
[Shouts]
22
00:00:42,866 --> 00:00:44,066
Everybody's waiting
23
00:00:44,067 --> 00:00:46,002
For the man with the bag
damn it!
24
00:00:46,003 --> 00:00:47,003
[Subway doors chime]
25
00:00:47,004 --> 00:00:49,105
Excuse me!
Hold the train.
26
00:00:49,106 --> 00:00:50,472
Thank you.
27
00:00:50,473 --> 00:00:51,774
He's got a sleigh full
28
00:00:51,775 --> 00:00:54,010
It's not go...
What the hell is that?
29
00:00:55,278 --> 00:00:57,812
How Hindu are you?
It's a Christmas tree.
30
00:00:57,847 --> 00:00:59,748
I don't think so.
What are you doing?
31
00:00:59,749 --> 00:01:01,049
What were you holding?
32
00:01:01,050 --> 00:01:02,250
[Overlapping comments]
33
00:01:02,251 --> 00:01:03,518
Son of a bitch.
(Danny) Mindy, Mindy.
34
00:01:03,519 --> 00:01:06,521
Mindy, no. (Morgan) Dr. L. Aagh!
35
00:01:06,555 --> 00:01:09,357
Put the tree back!
(Morgan) Just like the Grinch!
36
00:01:09,391 --> 00:01:13,394
[Chatter continues
in background]
37
00:01:13,428 --> 00:01:14,662
No!
Oh!
38
00:01:16,597 --> 00:01:18,565
Merry Christmas!
39
00:01:18,599 --> 00:01:21,601
[Upbeat music]
40
00:01:21,602 --> 00:01:23,570
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
41
00:01:23,571 --> 00:01:24,872
(Betsy)
Good morning, everyone.
42
00:01:24,906 --> 00:01:26,306
Dr, Reed?
43
00:01:26,307 --> 00:01:28,709
Dr. Reed. Oh!
44
00:01:28,710 --> 00:01:31,610
Everyone, Dr. Reed
is thin and handsome again.
45
00:01:31,645 --> 00:01:35,347
Okay, calm down.
Whoa.
46
00:01:35,348 --> 00:01:37,616
Someone's looking good enough
to get roofied.
47
00:01:37,651 --> 00:01:39,152
Your body looks amazing.
48
00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:40,653
Aren't you glad
I made you go to fat camp?
49
00:01:40,688 --> 00:01:42,121
It wasn't a fat camp.
50
00:01:42,122 --> 00:01:44,857
It was the center,
an holistic weight loss clinic
51
00:01:44,858 --> 00:01:46,725
where I learned
I'd been addicted to food.
52
00:01:46,726 --> 00:01:49,227
Dr. Reed, your secret Santa
left this for you.
53
00:01:49,228 --> 00:01:50,628
Thank you.
54
00:01:50,629 --> 00:01:52,864
Oh, my God.
55
00:01:52,865 --> 00:01:54,866
Oh, it's the toffee
from where I grew up as a kid.
56
00:01:54,867 --> 00:01:56,267
You can't even buy this
in America.
57
00:01:56,268 --> 00:01:59,304
It's too full of fat
and sugar.
58
00:01:59,305 --> 00:02:00,972
Thank you,
whoever bought me this.
59
00:02:00,973 --> 00:02:02,239
It's a nice gift.
60
00:02:02,273 --> 00:02:03,640
Good-bye, toffee.
61
00:02:05,476 --> 00:02:06,744
I love when you spend
the night at Heather's.
62
00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:09,479
It means that I get
a morning commute buddy.
63
00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:11,816
I used to think that this
other guy was my commute buddy,
64
00:02:11,817 --> 00:02:14,018
but it turned out that he just
lived on the subway.
65
00:02:14,019 --> 00:02:15,219
And I didn't find out...
66
00:02:15,220 --> 00:02:16,286
Cliff.
67
00:02:16,287 --> 00:02:17,421
Hey, cliff, cliff.
68
00:02:17,455 --> 00:02:18,588
My story,
did you hear it?
69
00:02:18,622 --> 00:02:19,923
Yeah, sorry.
70
00:02:19,924 --> 00:02:21,891
I was up
till 3:00 A.M. last night.
71
00:02:21,926 --> 00:02:23,026
Why were you up?
72
00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:25,028
Heather and I got
in a huge fight.
73
00:02:25,062 --> 00:02:27,563
You did?
Mm-hmm.
74
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:29,799
Not you and Heather!
75
00:02:29,834 --> 00:02:32,568
You guys are one of the great
couples of all time.
76
00:02:32,603 --> 00:02:35,270
Well, lately, everything I do
makes her mad...
77
00:02:35,271 --> 00:02:36,772
How I talk...
What?
78
00:02:36,773 --> 00:02:38,107
The way I organize
my sweaters.
79
00:02:38,108 --> 00:02:39,274
In Roy G.
Biv color order.
80
00:02:39,308 --> 00:02:40,743
It's OCD, but...
81
00:02:40,777 --> 00:02:43,912
I swear that if we didn't have
concert tickets this month
82
00:02:43,947 --> 00:02:45,147
we'd break up.
83
00:02:45,181 --> 00:02:46,749
Exciting news, everybody.
84
00:02:46,783 --> 00:02:48,316
This Friday,
Shulman and associates
85
00:02:48,317 --> 00:02:51,753
is having a Christmas party
for the entire building.
86
00:02:51,787 --> 00:02:53,687
The entire building?
Yeah.
87
00:02:53,722 --> 00:02:55,189
This building
is full of randos
88
00:02:55,190 --> 00:02:56,257
who we should get
to know better.
89
00:02:56,258 --> 00:02:57,925
The notary public
on five,
90
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,427
maybe those cool lawyers
across the hallway.
91
00:03:00,428 --> 00:03:02,797
Okay, is this a ploy
so you can hang out with cliff?
92
00:03:02,831 --> 00:03:04,065
What?
What are you saying?
93
00:03:04,066 --> 00:03:05,733
Are you having a stroke?
What does that even mean?
94
00:03:05,767 --> 00:03:08,668
Oh, and we can exchange
our final secret Santa gifts.
95
00:03:08,702 --> 00:03:11,104
Oh, that reminds me.
I'm your secret Santa.
96
00:03:11,139 --> 00:03:13,173
Medical gauze?
Come on.
97
00:03:13,207 --> 00:03:15,441
Yeah, I don't believe in
spending money on stupid things.
98
00:03:15,442 --> 00:03:18,544
Really? So I assume
you got that shirt for free?
99
00:03:18,545 --> 00:03:19,980
Bazinga!
What?
100
00:03:19,981 --> 00:03:21,781
And with that classic Danny dig,
it's settled.
101
00:03:21,782 --> 00:03:23,149
We're gonna have a party.
102
00:03:23,150 --> 00:03:24,683
You and I have to
go get food. Okay.
103
00:03:24,717 --> 00:03:26,873
I think the party
should be gluten-free.
104
00:03:26,887 --> 00:03:28,087
What? No. Why?
105
00:03:28,088 --> 00:03:30,256
'Cause Tamra has
Celiac's disease.
106
00:03:30,257 --> 00:03:32,057
Yeah, when my stomach
sees gluten,
107
00:03:32,058 --> 00:03:33,659
it's like,
"this ain't your party,"
108
00:03:33,693 --> 00:03:35,161
but how'd you know?
109
00:03:35,195 --> 00:03:36,962
I log what you eat.
110
00:03:36,997 --> 00:03:39,030
I notice what you eat.
111
00:03:39,064 --> 00:03:40,784
Okay, fine, whatever,
it can be gluten-free.
112
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,066
Peter, Jeremy, I need you guys
113
00:03:42,101 --> 00:03:43,802
to go pick up classy alcohol.
114
00:03:43,836 --> 00:03:45,197
Yeah, that's not gonna work
for me.
115
00:03:45,204 --> 00:03:46,704
It's come to my attention
116
00:03:46,738 --> 00:03:48,206
that, during special events
in my life,
117
00:03:48,207 --> 00:03:51,209
I maybe partake
in alcohol a little too much.
118
00:03:51,243 --> 00:03:53,944
And, as you know,
last year at a holiday party,
119
00:03:53,978 --> 00:03:55,545
I made sex
to a Christmas tree.
120
00:03:55,579 --> 00:03:57,514
Well, we'll miss you,
but it's probably
121
00:03:57,515 --> 00:04:00,483
for the best, and ultimately
we won't notice your absence.
122
00:04:00,484 --> 00:04:02,552
So, Betsy, I need you
to get 4,000 wine coolers.
123
00:04:02,586 --> 00:04:05,289
You won't notice my absence
because I'll be there.
124
00:04:05,290 --> 00:04:07,324
And I would hope that you guys
would respect my wishes
125
00:04:07,325 --> 00:04:09,026
and maybe keep it
a dry party.
126
00:04:09,060 --> 00:04:11,160
Ex-queeze me?
That's very mature of you, Peter.
127
00:04:11,161 --> 00:04:12,695
No, just because...
128
00:04:12,729 --> 00:04:13,963
Here's what's happening...
Shulman and associates
129
00:04:13,964 --> 00:04:15,064
are hosting a Christmas party
130
00:04:15,065 --> 00:04:17,499
free of gluten
and alcohol.
131
00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:19,168
And I have
a deadly allergy to...
132
00:04:19,203 --> 00:04:21,170
I'm sorry, I can't hear any more
restrictions for the party.
133
00:04:21,205 --> 00:04:22,271
(Peter)
Okay, why does this building
134
00:04:22,272 --> 00:04:24,040
have so many taxidermists
in it?
135
00:04:24,074 --> 00:04:25,674
It's gonna be
a weird party.
136
00:04:25,675 --> 00:04:27,876
Last time I was
at a holiday party sober
137
00:04:27,877 --> 00:04:30,212
was at my sixth grade
snowflake play.
138
00:04:30,213 --> 00:04:31,346
Actually,
you know what,
139
00:04:31,347 --> 00:04:32,981
I had two beers
that night.
140
00:04:33,015 --> 00:04:35,550
The holidays can be tough
for us food junkies too.
141
00:04:35,551 --> 00:04:37,685
But luckily, they did give us
a secret weapon
142
00:04:37,686 --> 00:04:40,088
at the center...
This is a taste spray
143
00:04:40,122 --> 00:04:42,156
designed to satisfy
my cravings.
144
00:04:42,190 --> 00:04:46,460
Short rib mist.
Yummy.
145
00:04:46,461 --> 00:04:48,062
I am very full now.
146
00:04:48,096 --> 00:04:49,864
Okay, the only way
we're gonna make it
147
00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,999
through this party
is if we're sober buddies.
148
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:53,734
Yes.
You stop me from drinking...
149
00:04:53,768 --> 00:04:56,203
You stop me from taking queso
into the bathroom.
150
00:04:56,238 --> 00:04:57,771
(Both)
Deal.
151
00:04:57,772 --> 00:05:00,273
So are you making
a gingerbread house this year?
152
00:05:00,274 --> 00:05:02,108
Nah,
I got a lot going on.
153
00:05:02,109 --> 00:05:04,844
Work, and my bank
just sent me a new credit card,
154
00:05:04,845 --> 00:05:06,545
so I have that to activate.
155
00:05:06,546 --> 00:05:08,248
You are such a horrible liar.
156
00:05:08,249 --> 00:05:10,449
I bet you already imported sugar
stained glass from Germany.
157
00:05:10,450 --> 00:05:12,185
Oh, please,
German sugar glass?
158
00:05:12,186 --> 00:05:15,053
It's notoriously brittle
and cloudy.
159
00:05:15,088 --> 00:05:18,123
[Softly]
Okay, I'll tell you this.
160
00:05:18,157 --> 00:05:19,624
I am making a structure.
161
00:05:19,625 --> 00:05:21,059
I'll give you a hint.
162
00:05:21,094 --> 00:05:22,594
It's the house of a man
163
00:05:22,595 --> 00:05:25,063
that's very important
to this country.
164
00:05:25,098 --> 00:05:27,565
Justin Timberlake's
childhood home in Nashville.
165
00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:29,001
What?
166
00:05:30,802 --> 00:05:31,936
Hello, Mindy,
Danny.
167
00:05:33,705 --> 00:05:35,406
Hello.
Hello.
168
00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:37,108
Have you met my new girlfriend
Maria Menounos?
169
00:05:37,109 --> 00:05:38,943
(Danny) Oh,
I'm a big fan of your journalism.
170
00:05:38,977 --> 00:05:41,245
You're my hair idol...
171
00:05:41,246 --> 00:05:42,980
Are you two dating?
172
00:05:43,015 --> 00:05:44,048
Yeah.
173
00:05:44,082 --> 00:05:46,082
Wh... you could have
almost anybody.
174
00:05:46,117 --> 00:05:48,684
Excuse me. I have never been
with such a soulful person.
175
00:05:48,685 --> 00:05:51,288
Aw. Come here, you. [Giggling]
176
00:05:51,322 --> 00:05:52,522
This is our first Christmas
together,
177
00:05:52,523 --> 00:05:55,258
and we've just been sharing
and celebrating.
178
00:05:55,293 --> 00:05:57,627
Oh, my gosh, Mindy,
what's wrong with me?
179
00:05:57,628 --> 00:05:59,629
Here I am,
flaunting our blooming love,
180
00:05:59,630 --> 00:06:01,697
and you with your
engagement breakup.
181
00:06:01,698 --> 00:06:03,632
I'm just sorry.
Okay, listen, pal,
182
00:06:03,633 --> 00:06:04,800
she's fine, okay?
183
00:06:04,801 --> 00:06:06,201
She's been going out
with a lot of guys
184
00:06:06,202 --> 00:06:08,237
since that guy...
Probably too many guys.
185
00:06:08,238 --> 00:06:09,238
Shh, that's not...
A lot.
186
00:06:09,239 --> 00:06:10,406
The right amount.
The normal amount.
187
00:06:10,407 --> 00:06:12,441
Not really.
Maria... no, hush, hush.
188
00:06:12,442 --> 00:06:13,943
It's been quite a... the point
is that I'm doing fantastic.
189
00:06:13,944 --> 00:06:15,311
She's doing great.
190
00:06:15,345 --> 00:06:17,746
Mindy, you don't have
to shine it on in front of me.
191
00:06:17,747 --> 00:06:18,913
I'm a friend, okay?
192
00:06:18,948 --> 00:06:22,050
Holidays are always hardest
on the lonely.
193
00:06:22,051 --> 00:06:25,186
Suicide rates
do go up as we all know.
194
00:06:25,220 --> 00:06:27,021
Sorry.
Bye, Maria.
195
00:06:27,022 --> 00:06:28,990
I'm actually dating someone too.
196
00:06:29,024 --> 00:06:31,592
He's handsome lawyer
who works in this building.
197
00:06:31,626 --> 00:06:32,927
Oh.
198
00:06:32,928 --> 00:06:34,694
Well, that's...
That's great.
199
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:36,363
No, no,
it's better than great.
200
00:06:36,364 --> 00:06:38,531
It's great!
201
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:39,799
Well, if he works
in the building,
202
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:41,935
I look forward to meeting him
at the party.
203
00:06:41,970 --> 00:06:43,636
Great.
204
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,472
Okay, let's go.
We can't get out.
205
00:06:45,506 --> 00:06:47,740
We have to go back up...
Okay, fine.
206
00:06:49,701 --> 00:06:51,067
Why did you tell Deslaurier
you were dating
207
00:06:51,068 --> 00:06:52,469
a lawyer
in the building?
208
00:06:52,470 --> 00:06:53,969
'Cause he was rubbing
Menounos in my face.
209
00:06:53,970 --> 00:06:55,305
Menounos.
Menounos.
210
00:06:55,306 --> 00:06:57,239
Ugh, I hate him.
Besides, who knows?
211
00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:59,241
Maybe at the party
I will be dating someone.
212
00:06:59,242 --> 00:07:01,177
I knew it.
I knew it.
213
00:07:01,178 --> 00:07:03,212
Building-wide
Christmas party,
214
00:07:03,213 --> 00:07:06,081
all the sexy mood lighting
you installed in Phlebotomy.
215
00:07:06,082 --> 00:07:09,084
Well, you know, soft lighting
is good for urine samples too.
216
00:07:09,085 --> 00:07:11,353
No, no, this is
a Christmas party sex trap
217
00:07:11,387 --> 00:07:12,487
so you can get to cliff.
218
00:07:12,488 --> 00:07:13,988
Is that so wrong,
Danny?
219
00:07:13,989 --> 00:07:15,791
Is it so wrong for an unmarried
23-year-old woman
220
00:07:15,792 --> 00:07:17,258
to throw a party
so she can meet a man?
221
00:07:17,259 --> 00:07:19,060
You're a little nut job,
and it's not gonna work.
222
00:07:19,061 --> 00:07:20,429
Thank you for saying
that I'm little,
223
00:07:20,430 --> 00:07:21,896
and it will work,
and I'll tell you why.
224
00:07:21,897 --> 00:07:23,031
Because I have
225
00:07:23,065 --> 00:07:24,199
a foolproof, four-point,
226
00:07:24,233 --> 00:07:25,533
man-catching party plan.
227
00:07:25,534 --> 00:07:27,234
Oh, boy.
Wanna hear about it?
228
00:07:27,268 --> 00:07:28,636
Not really, but...
You're gonna.
229
00:07:28,670 --> 00:07:30,170
I know. (Mindy) Here's the plan.
230
00:07:30,171 --> 00:07:34,675
Step one: Throw the greatest
party anyone has ever seen.
231
00:07:34,676 --> 00:07:37,645
When the guy gets there,
ignore him.
232
00:07:37,679 --> 00:07:42,682
Instead, be talking
to the coolest guy in the room.
233
00:07:43,884 --> 00:07:45,618
Step two:
234
00:07:45,619 --> 00:07:47,487
I do a sexy version
of Santa baby.
235
00:07:47,488 --> 00:07:49,389
It's both titillating
and festive.
236
00:07:49,423 --> 00:07:51,023
[Santa baby playing]
237
00:07:51,058 --> 00:07:53,092
Santa baby
238
00:07:53,093 --> 00:07:56,529
Just slip a sable
under the tree
239
00:07:56,564 --> 00:07:58,163
For me
240
00:07:58,197 --> 00:07:59,965
Santa baby?
It's disgusting.
241
00:07:59,966 --> 00:08:01,533
It sexualizes Santa.
242
00:08:01,568 --> 00:08:05,070
Step three:
Pretend you're overheated.
243
00:08:05,071 --> 00:08:07,105
Say you need some air.
244
00:08:07,106 --> 00:08:10,275
Make him follow you
to a private location.
245
00:08:10,276 --> 00:08:14,579
Step four: Finally alone
in a romantic setting,
246
00:08:14,580 --> 00:08:17,582
he and I share
a perfect first kiss.
247
00:08:17,616 --> 00:08:19,984
That's the stupidest plan
I've ever heard.
248
00:08:20,018 --> 00:08:21,786
You're wrong.
You'll see tomorrow night
249
00:08:21,787 --> 00:08:23,921
when I'm tonguing cliff
in the courtyard.
250
00:08:23,955 --> 00:08:26,156
Come on.
All right.
251
00:08:29,227 --> 00:08:32,228
[Soft music plays]
252
00:08:32,229 --> 00:08:33,997
253
00:08:33,998 --> 00:08:35,832
And this is Elizabeth,
my other dog.
254
00:08:35,833 --> 00:08:37,233
You would love her.
255
00:08:37,268 --> 00:08:38,535
Aww!
256
00:08:38,569 --> 00:08:40,871
That's a beautiful dog.
257
00:08:40,872 --> 00:08:42,939
It'd take a lot
of sawdust to fill her up.
258
00:08:42,973 --> 00:08:44,508
[Chuckles]
259
00:08:44,509 --> 00:08:45,808
Wait, what?
260
00:08:45,809 --> 00:08:47,843
[Knocking] What
the hell was so important?
261
00:08:47,844 --> 00:08:48,911
What are you doing?
262
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:49,978
Come here.
263
00:08:49,979 --> 00:08:50,979
Help me
fill my bra up with wine.
264
00:08:50,980 --> 00:08:52,981
Okay,
no further questions.
265
00:08:52,982 --> 00:08:54,483
Open this.
266
00:08:54,484 --> 00:08:57,286
I bought a bra that holds
two full bottles full of wine.
267
00:08:57,320 --> 00:08:59,789
I thought this thing was
supposed to be sober for Peter.
268
00:08:59,823 --> 00:09:01,056
Peter doesn't have
to know about it.
269
00:09:01,057 --> 00:09:02,424
My man-catching plan
is not going to work
270
00:09:02,425 --> 00:09:03,525
without some booze, Danny.
271
00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:05,460
Plus, there's also
an added benefit.
272
00:09:05,494 --> 00:09:06,961
What's that?
Pour.
273
00:09:06,995 --> 00:09:09,330
Pour. Okay.
Here you go.
274
00:09:12,835 --> 00:09:14,168
You should wear that
every day.
275
00:09:14,202 --> 00:09:15,770
Okay, that's enough.
That's enough.
276
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,938
Okay.
Sorry.
277
00:09:20,675 --> 00:09:23,143
I mean, it's been
kind of a weird year.
278
00:09:23,144 --> 00:09:26,079
Had some losses
in my family.
279
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:27,414
I had to sell
a bunch of...
280
00:09:27,449 --> 00:09:31,752
[Fairy tale music]
281
00:09:31,786 --> 00:09:33,019
Pass down to my kids
one day.
282
00:09:33,020 --> 00:09:34,620
Morgan, I can't keep
talking to you.
283
00:09:34,621 --> 00:09:36,121
Totally understood.
284
00:09:38,191 --> 00:09:40,860
Okay, step one
of the sex trap.
285
00:09:40,894 --> 00:09:43,162
Find the coolest guy
in the room.
286
00:09:48,101 --> 00:09:50,368
Hey, you.
I'm Mindy.
287
00:09:50,369 --> 00:09:52,871
Oh, Biruk.
It is very nice to meet you.
288
00:09:52,905 --> 00:09:54,238
Great to meet you.
289
00:09:57,176 --> 00:09:58,443
[Laughs]
290
00:09:58,444 --> 00:10:00,545
Oh, Biruk,
you're too much.
291
00:10:00,580 --> 00:10:01,947
I did not say anything.
292
00:10:01,981 --> 00:10:04,687
Oh, it's your whole...
Thing.
293
00:10:05,650 --> 00:10:07,651
[Whispers] Yes.
My man trap is working.
294
00:10:07,686 --> 00:10:09,553
I was once caught
in a man trap.
295
00:10:09,588 --> 00:10:10,855
I knew I had
to escape the net
296
00:10:10,889 --> 00:10:13,524
or else endure the horrors
of human trafficking.
297
00:10:13,558 --> 00:10:18,896
Okay, um...
Do you live downtown?
298
00:10:18,930 --> 00:10:20,297
Yay, sober buddy.
299
00:10:20,331 --> 00:10:22,031
Not drinking
at a party eats, dog.
300
00:10:22,065 --> 00:10:24,634
Hitting on women...
Out of the equation.
301
00:10:24,668 --> 00:10:26,736
I mean, Maria Menounos
is right over there.
302
00:10:26,770 --> 00:10:30,072
The term "blue-collar"
drives me insane.
303
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:32,809
The woman I'd create
had I a weird science machine.
304
00:10:32,843 --> 00:10:34,243
If I was drunk,
I'd go over there
305
00:10:34,244 --> 00:10:35,678
and snatch her away
from Deslaurier.
306
00:10:35,713 --> 00:10:37,713
Go and do that.
Go talk to her.
307
00:10:37,747 --> 00:10:39,581
Come on. I'd need, like,
six or seven hard lemmies
308
00:10:39,582 --> 00:10:41,817
to even think about going
over there to talk to her.
309
00:10:41,851 --> 00:10:43,084
What am I supposed to do
with my hands
310
00:10:43,085 --> 00:10:44,753
if I'm not holding beers?
Huh?
311
00:10:44,787 --> 00:10:46,755
Yeah, put them down.
It's unpleasant.
312
00:10:48,324 --> 00:10:49,791
[Door opens]
313
00:10:49,792 --> 00:10:51,953
Wait a minute. Whoa, whoa,
can you knock first, please?
314
00:10:51,961 --> 00:10:53,761
I'm not gonna knock
to the hot pipe room.
315
00:10:53,762 --> 00:10:55,963
All right, what step
of the man trap are you on?
316
00:10:55,964 --> 00:10:57,197
Hit him over the head
with a rolling pin
317
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:58,399
and pull down his pants?
318
00:10:58,433 --> 00:10:59,767
Ha ha ha, you know
I don't own
319
00:10:59,768 --> 00:11:01,201
any cooking stuff...
Joke's on you.
320
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,738
For your information,
I'm on step two.
321
00:11:03,739 --> 00:11:05,105
Whoa.
322
00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:06,607
Is that what I think it is?
Okay.
323
00:11:06,608 --> 00:11:07,909
Look, close your eyes.
Stop it.
324
00:11:07,910 --> 00:11:09,843
You'll see it at the unveiling
with everybody else.
325
00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:12,579
I'll give you a hint.
It's located in Virginia.
326
00:11:12,613 --> 00:11:14,047
Mt. Rushmore?
327
00:11:14,081 --> 00:11:17,350
The Massachusetts public school
system has really let you down.
328
00:11:17,384 --> 00:11:19,686
I'm sorry.
I'm a good-looking doctor.
329
00:11:19,687 --> 00:11:21,187
I think it did fine.
Okay.
330
00:11:21,221 --> 00:11:22,789
And you know what?
I wish you put this much effort
331
00:11:22,823 --> 00:11:23,823
into your secret Santa
presents.
332
00:11:23,824 --> 00:11:24,891
Oh, yeah,
that reminds me,
333
00:11:24,926 --> 00:11:26,959
I got you this.
334
00:11:26,993 --> 00:11:28,761
I refuse
Toto accept that gift.
335
00:11:28,762 --> 00:11:30,062
I got Peter a replica
336
00:11:30,096 --> 00:11:32,097
of the Dukes of hazzard car,
337
00:11:32,131 --> 00:11:33,498
and I barely like him.
338
00:11:33,499 --> 00:11:34,800
That's what a secret Santa
does.
339
00:11:34,801 --> 00:11:36,035
Fine.
Hurry up.
340
00:11:36,069 --> 00:11:37,536
The sexy routine is next.
I gotta work.
341
00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:40,105
Just give me peace.
342
00:11:40,139 --> 00:11:41,606
I love this.
343
00:11:41,607 --> 00:11:43,775
Nothing says Christmas like
a traditional nativity scene.
344
00:11:43,809 --> 00:11:45,476
You know,
there's some recent scholarship
345
00:11:45,510 --> 00:11:48,412
that suggests Jesus
was actually a black woman.
346
00:11:48,413 --> 00:11:51,248
Right.
I need a drink.
347
00:11:51,249 --> 00:11:52,349
[Mumbles]
348
00:11:52,350 --> 00:11:54,619
Hi, have you seen Mindy
by any chance?
349
00:11:54,620 --> 00:11:56,220
I'm cliff, by the way.
350
00:11:56,254 --> 00:11:57,921
Hi, cliff,
I'm Brendan Deslaurier.
351
00:11:57,922 --> 00:12:00,190
I run the holistic
health center upstairs.
352
00:12:00,191 --> 00:12:01,592
We specialize
in midwifery
353
00:12:01,593 --> 00:12:03,026
and scream therapy,
shriek yoga.
354
00:12:03,027 --> 00:12:04,160
[Chuckles]
355
00:12:04,195 --> 00:12:05,261
I'd say I feel sorry
for the guy
356
00:12:05,262 --> 00:12:07,631
who works below you,
but that's me.
357
00:12:07,665 --> 00:12:09,766
I work at Gilbert, Lurie,
and Shapiro.
358
00:12:09,767 --> 00:12:12,235
Oh, you're the lawyer
from the building.
359
00:12:12,236 --> 00:12:13,303
You're Mindy's new boyfriend?
360
00:12:13,337 --> 00:12:14,638
No.
361
00:12:14,639 --> 00:12:16,438
Didn't realize
she had a boyfriend.
362
00:12:16,473 --> 00:12:18,074
You know, I was surprised
to hear it too.
363
00:12:18,108 --> 00:12:20,442
Suppose it was a different
lawyer from the building.
364
00:12:20,477 --> 00:12:23,245
She does tend to get around
in the workplace.
365
00:12:23,279 --> 00:12:25,581
Okay, well, thanks.
366
00:12:25,582 --> 00:12:27,516
I appreciate it.
It was nice to meet you.
367
00:12:27,517 --> 00:12:29,118
Excuse me.
Nice to meet you.
368
00:12:29,152 --> 00:12:30,952
Sorry to make you sad,
cliff.
369
00:12:30,987 --> 00:12:34,155
(Mindy) Everyone, quit talking
and look over here, please.
370
00:12:34,189 --> 00:12:35,289
Hey, gang.
371
00:12:35,324 --> 00:12:37,225
I have
a naughty Christmas surprise
372
00:12:37,226 --> 00:12:38,827
for all of you.
373
00:12:38,861 --> 00:12:40,729
Yeah! 'Cause now
that everybody's here...
374
00:12:40,763 --> 00:12:42,797
I thought...
375
00:12:42,798 --> 00:12:46,767
Wait, where is everybody?
376
00:12:46,801 --> 00:12:48,702
We're here.
Over here.
377
00:12:48,703 --> 00:12:50,704
I see Beverly.
Damn it.
378
00:12:50,739 --> 00:12:52,706
I just want to make sure
that 100% of the people
379
00:12:52,707 --> 00:12:53,774
we invited are here.
380
00:12:53,808 --> 00:12:57,044
I think 99.9% of everyone
is here.
381
00:12:57,078 --> 00:12:58,946
Come on.
Sing your raunchy song.
382
00:12:58,980 --> 00:13:00,781
Hold on one second, okay?
383
00:13:00,815 --> 00:13:03,449
Okay.
Dr. L, you're losing the room.
384
00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:05,051
This is anticlimactic.
You got focus.
385
00:13:05,052 --> 00:13:07,486
[Overlapping chatter]
386
00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:08,855
I'm gonna rap.
I'm gonna rap.
387
00:13:08,856 --> 00:13:10,123
Coitus inte...
388
00:13:10,157 --> 00:13:11,557
Never mind.
389
00:13:11,558 --> 00:13:13,760
Naughty song called off.
390
00:13:13,794 --> 00:13:15,327
(Morgan)
Dr. L.?
391
00:13:15,362 --> 00:13:17,363
Mindy, why aren't you
gonna do your song?
392
00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:18,664
It's dumb.
393
00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:20,065
It's so adorable.
Go do it.
394
00:13:20,066 --> 00:13:22,134
Maybe.
Okay.
395
00:13:22,168 --> 00:13:23,234
I guess I could give it
a try.
396
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:25,236
You know what,
why don't you go
397
00:13:25,237 --> 00:13:26,571
take a nap or something?
398
00:13:26,605 --> 00:13:28,674
But you were
so encouraging...
399
00:13:28,708 --> 00:13:30,976
Santa baby
400
00:13:31,010 --> 00:13:34,511
Just slip a sable
under the tree
401
00:13:34,512 --> 00:13:37,915
For me
402
00:13:37,949 --> 00:13:40,217
Been an awful good girl
403
00:13:40,251 --> 00:13:41,986
Santa baby
404
00:13:42,020 --> 00:13:45,823
So hurry down the chimney
tonight
405
00:13:45,857 --> 00:13:47,524
[mouthing]
Stop.
406
00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:53,619
Santa baby,
forgot...
407
00:13:53,653 --> 00:13:55,387
How long are we meant
to listen to this?
408
00:13:55,388 --> 00:13:58,724
Does anyone...
a ring
409
00:13:58,725 --> 00:14:00,092
[grunts]
410
00:14:00,093 --> 00:14:02,361
I don't mean
on the phone
411
00:14:02,362 --> 00:14:04,396
Santa baby
412
00:14:04,397 --> 00:14:05,965
So hurry down
413
00:14:05,966 --> 00:14:07,999
The chimney tonight
414
00:14:11,069 --> 00:14:12,704
Hurry.
415
00:14:12,705 --> 00:14:13,905
Tonight
416
00:14:13,906 --> 00:14:15,907
Oh, no.
417
00:14:15,908 --> 00:14:17,575
Oh, no.
Thank you.
418
00:14:17,576 --> 00:14:19,477
Oh, my God.
I don't even know the lyrics
419
00:14:19,478 --> 00:14:21,479
to this song.
It just came out of me.
420
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:22,746
[Cheers and applause]
Here you go.
421
00:14:22,747 --> 00:14:23,947
Brendan!
It was amazing.
422
00:14:23,948 --> 00:14:25,749
Merry Christmas.
423
00:14:27,952 --> 00:14:30,320
You were offering up
your womanhood to Santa
424
00:14:30,321 --> 00:14:31,788
in exchange
for material gifts.
425
00:14:31,789 --> 00:14:33,790
It was just a stupid song.
426
00:14:33,791 --> 00:14:35,158
I thought you would like it.
427
00:14:35,159 --> 00:14:36,660
Well, as a feminist,
it offended me
428
00:14:36,661 --> 00:14:37,928
to my core.
429
00:14:37,929 --> 00:14:39,261
Peter, help me.
430
00:14:39,262 --> 00:14:41,497
I need my sober buddy.
I've tasted frosting.
431
00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:43,098
Quiet.
Look.
432
00:14:43,099 --> 00:14:45,001
I'm sorry.
I just can't do this.
433
00:14:45,002 --> 00:14:46,002
I'm done.
434
00:14:46,036 --> 00:14:49,471
Have a very aware Kwanzaa.
435
00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:50,673
It's a Christmas miracle.
436
00:14:50,707 --> 00:14:51,974
What are you talking about?
437
00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:53,142
Because Maria
is my dream girl,
438
00:14:53,143 --> 00:14:54,476
and it's Christmas,
439
00:14:54,477 --> 00:14:55,944
and she just got dumped.
440
00:14:55,945 --> 00:14:57,812
But I thought you couldn't talk
to her sober?
441
00:14:57,813 --> 00:14:59,313
You're right.
442
00:14:59,348 --> 00:15:00,615
I need to get drunk.
443
00:15:00,616 --> 00:15:02,817
No. No.
No, no, no, ahh.
444
00:15:02,852 --> 00:15:05,520
Uh, food is pain.
Food is pain.
445
00:15:05,555 --> 00:15:08,322
Beverly, Beverly, I need
the strongest alcohol you have.
446
00:15:08,357 --> 00:15:10,158
Sorry, blue eyes,
I'm out.
447
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:11,593
What am I gonna do?
448
00:15:11,594 --> 00:15:12,826
You didn't hear it from me,
449
00:15:12,827 --> 00:15:15,495
but Dr. L's
wearing a booze bra.
450
00:15:15,496 --> 00:15:16,730
Okay, yes!
451
00:15:24,372 --> 00:15:26,807
(Woman)
Old Mr. Kringle
452
00:15:26,808 --> 00:15:28,641
Is soon gonna jingle
453
00:15:28,642 --> 00:15:30,009
Bells that will tingle
454
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:31,244
All your troubles away
455
00:15:31,245 --> 00:15:33,346
Monticello.
There you are.
456
00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:38,185
[Slurping]
457
00:15:38,219 --> 00:15:41,821
Ugh, stupid wine bra's
out of wine.
458
00:15:41,822 --> 00:15:44,190
I knew I should have brought
the long island iced panties.
459
00:15:44,224 --> 00:15:47,193
Min?
460
00:15:47,227 --> 00:15:50,096
Everybody's waiting
for the man with the bag
461
00:15:50,097 --> 00:15:53,432
'Cause Christmas
is coming again
462
00:15:53,433 --> 00:15:55,334
Are you sad about cliff?
463
00:15:55,335 --> 00:15:57,669
Sad is when the cab driver
thought I was Jaden Smith.
464
00:15:57,670 --> 00:15:59,371
I'm heartbroken.
465
00:15:59,406 --> 00:16:00,572
Well... well, so what?
466
00:16:00,573 --> 00:16:02,173
The guy left.
You weren't even dating.
467
00:16:02,174 --> 00:16:03,274
What's the big deal?
468
00:16:03,275 --> 00:16:04,375
The big deal is that I threw
469
00:16:04,376 --> 00:16:06,111
a party
with the sole purpose
470
00:16:06,112 --> 00:16:09,214
of getting a guy who is still
technically in a relationship
471
00:16:09,215 --> 00:16:11,583
to kiss me,
and then he left.
472
00:16:11,584 --> 00:16:13,551
I'm the most pathetic loser.
473
00:16:13,586 --> 00:16:18,122
I think I have something
that might cheer you up.
474
00:16:18,123 --> 00:16:19,389
From your secret Santa.
475
00:16:19,390 --> 00:16:21,525
No, Danny, look, you said
you didn't want
476
00:16:21,526 --> 00:16:23,094
to spend money
on a secret Santa.
477
00:16:23,095 --> 00:16:24,394
I shouldn't have expected
a gift.
478
00:16:24,395 --> 00:16:27,498
Sometimes the best gifts
don't cost anything.
479
00:16:27,499 --> 00:16:29,233
I guess if you're, like,
480
00:16:29,234 --> 00:16:31,801
a poor mouse
in a Christmas special.
481
00:16:31,802 --> 00:16:34,237
Okay, here we go. (Timbaland)
It's been a long time
482
00:16:34,238 --> 00:16:35,805
When you first
started working here,
483
00:16:35,806 --> 00:16:37,206
you used to play this nonstop.
484
00:16:37,207 --> 00:16:39,909
It was the first thing about you
that ever really annoyed me.
485
00:16:39,910 --> 00:16:41,111
Step to, step to
486
00:16:41,112 --> 00:16:43,046
Freaky, freaky,
baby girl
487
00:16:43,047 --> 00:16:44,247
(Aaliyah)
What would you do
488
00:16:44,248 --> 00:16:45,515
To get to me
489
00:16:45,516 --> 00:16:46,850
What would you say
490
00:16:46,851 --> 00:16:48,416
To have your way
491
00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:49,584
Would you give up
492
00:16:49,585 --> 00:16:50,953
Or try again
493
00:16:50,954 --> 00:16:52,054
If I hesitated
494
00:16:52,055 --> 00:16:53,188
To let you in
495
00:16:53,189 --> 00:16:54,523
Now would you be yourself
496
00:16:54,524 --> 00:16:55,824
Or play your role
497
00:16:55,825 --> 00:16:58,360
Tell all the boys
or keep it low
498
00:16:58,361 --> 00:16:59,795
If I say no
499
00:16:59,796 --> 00:17:01,130
Would you turn away
500
00:17:01,131 --> 00:17:02,230
Or play me off
501
00:17:02,231 --> 00:17:03,298
Or would you stay
502
00:17:03,299 --> 00:17:04,431
Oh, if at first
503
00:17:04,432 --> 00:17:05,599
You don't succeed
504
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:06,968
If at first
you don't succeed
505
00:17:06,969 --> 00:17:10,471
Then dust yourself off
and try again
506
00:17:10,472 --> 00:17:12,540
Dust yourself off
and try again
507
00:17:12,541 --> 00:17:14,876
Try again
I know it's stupid.
508
00:17:14,877 --> 00:17:19,480
So anyway I can get you a gift
card or write a personal check.
509
00:17:19,481 --> 00:17:21,214
Don't worry about it.
510
00:17:21,215 --> 00:17:23,116
Just don't tell Morgan
or Jeremy about it.
511
00:17:23,117 --> 00:17:25,618
Okay?
What are you talking about?
512
00:17:25,619 --> 00:17:27,154
I loved it.
513
00:17:27,155 --> 00:17:29,322
You liked it?
514
00:17:42,535 --> 00:17:44,904
Mindy, give me
that boob wine.
515
00:17:44,905 --> 00:17:46,538
What?
No. No.
516
00:17:46,539 --> 00:17:49,041
Danny, I'm sorry.
I'm a monster.
517
00:17:49,042 --> 00:17:50,542
Monticello!
518
00:17:50,543 --> 00:17:53,144
Stop!
Do we have any cinderblocks?
519
00:17:53,145 --> 00:17:55,847
Some of the guests want to see
me towow 'em off the roof.
520
00:17:57,649 --> 00:17:59,984
Whoa,
weird energy in here.
521
00:18:00,986 --> 00:18:02,987
Is the ghost back?
522
00:18:05,165 --> 00:18:06,666
[Peter slurping]
523
00:18:06,667 --> 00:18:07,867
What are we doing?
524
00:18:07,902 --> 00:18:09,602
Give me that.
I don't know.
525
00:18:09,603 --> 00:18:10,970
One minute I'm normal,
526
00:18:10,971 --> 00:18:13,072
next minute I'm sucking down
Mindy's bra wine.
527
00:18:13,106 --> 00:18:14,140
You ate a whole house.
528
00:18:14,141 --> 00:18:15,441
No, it's not just a house.
529
00:18:15,442 --> 00:18:17,843
It's an icon
of American architecture.
530
00:18:17,877 --> 00:18:20,012
Maybe I'm just a fat guy,
you know.
531
00:18:20,046 --> 00:18:21,246
I mean,
I'm in the right country for it.
532
00:18:21,247 --> 00:18:23,015
And I'm tall,
so I wear it well.
533
00:18:23,049 --> 00:18:24,850
Hey, hey, hey, whoever told you
that was lying.
534
00:18:24,884 --> 00:18:26,051
[Sighs]
You know what?
535
00:18:26,085 --> 00:18:27,152
Our deepest fear
536
00:18:27,153 --> 00:18:28,453
is not that
we're inadequate.
537
00:18:28,454 --> 00:18:30,522
It's that we're powerful
beyond measure.
538
00:18:30,557 --> 00:18:31,689
That's a quote
539
00:18:31,723 --> 00:18:33,257
from my frat buddy,
pubes.
540
00:18:33,291 --> 00:18:35,726
Maybe you should listen
to his advice, Peter.
541
00:18:35,727 --> 00:18:36,894
You're scared.
542
00:18:36,929 --> 00:18:38,395
Otherwise you'd be
out there right now
543
00:18:38,396 --> 00:18:40,431
sober-snogging
Maria Menounos.
544
00:18:40,432 --> 00:18:42,099
You might not be
the most attractive guy,
545
00:18:42,133 --> 00:18:44,035
but she's vulnerable,
and you're here.
546
00:18:44,069 --> 00:18:46,170
You don't need
to be drunk.
547
00:18:46,204 --> 00:18:48,337
You know what?
You're right.
548
00:18:48,338 --> 00:18:50,173
I am here.
549
00:18:50,207 --> 00:18:51,507
And that's as good
a reason as any
550
00:18:51,508 --> 00:18:52,676
for a chick to make out with me.
551
00:18:52,710 --> 00:18:54,044
Let's go get 'em,
sober buddy.
552
00:18:54,045 --> 00:18:55,211
(Mindy)
Get out, get out, get out.
553
00:18:55,212 --> 00:18:57,747
Please, for God's sakes,
get out of here.
554
00:18:57,782 --> 00:19:00,249
Hey.
555
00:19:00,284 --> 00:19:03,553
I was gonna go get
a breath of fresh air.
556
00:19:03,554 --> 00:19:05,788
Yeah.
I'm gonna stay.
557
00:19:05,789 --> 00:19:09,625
I gotta...
I gotta clean up this mess.
558
00:19:09,659 --> 00:19:12,461
Okay.
559
00:19:21,136 --> 00:19:23,037
Hi.
Hello.
560
00:19:23,072 --> 00:19:24,639
I'm Peter.
I don't think we got
561
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:25,707
a chance to meet before.
562
00:19:25,741 --> 00:19:27,575
Hi, Peter.
I was just leaving.
563
00:19:27,610 --> 00:19:31,278
Well, could you leave
your beautiful body here?
564
00:19:31,279 --> 00:19:32,780
Oy.
565
00:19:32,815 --> 00:19:35,349
I have an early remote to shoot
at a Christmas tree farm
566
00:19:35,350 --> 00:19:37,151
in Connecticut tomorrow.
567
00:19:37,185 --> 00:19:39,453
What a thought-provoking piece.
I would love to see that.
568
00:19:39,488 --> 00:19:41,855
My boyfriend was supposed
to drive me there tonight,
569
00:19:41,856 --> 00:19:42,888
but he left.
570
00:19:42,923 --> 00:19:44,157
I'd love to give you a ride,
571
00:19:44,158 --> 00:19:45,258
but I'm too drunk.
572
00:19:45,259 --> 00:19:47,427
Wait.
I'm not drunk at all.
573
00:19:47,461 --> 00:19:48,928
I haven't had anything
to drink.
574
00:19:48,929 --> 00:19:49,929
For the first time
in my life,
575
00:19:49,963 --> 00:19:51,030
I'm sober at a party.
576
00:19:51,031 --> 00:19:52,499
I can give you a ride.
Are you sure?
577
00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:53,566
Yeah.
It's late.
578
00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:54,567
Nah.
579
00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:56,002
We do have
those hotel rooms.
580
00:19:56,036 --> 00:19:58,837
What, what?
You could stay there if you wanted.
581
00:19:58,871 --> 00:20:00,572
I would like to do that
very much.
582
00:20:00,607 --> 00:20:02,574
Are you sure?
Yes, I'm positive.
583
00:20:02,609 --> 00:20:03,642
Really?
Yes.
584
00:20:03,643 --> 00:20:06,011
Okay.
Thanks.
585
00:20:06,045 --> 00:20:07,078
Yeah.
586
00:20:07,113 --> 00:20:09,248
(Woman)
Last Christmas
587
00:20:09,282 --> 00:20:12,384
Well, pigeon, I guess
it's just me and you now.
588
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,585
Guess today
didn't end up as...
589
00:20:14,586 --> 00:20:17,522
Sure.
590
00:20:17,523 --> 00:20:19,524
Mindy?
591
00:20:19,558 --> 00:20:20,724
Cliff.
Hey.
592
00:20:20,725 --> 00:20:22,426
You came back.
Yeah.
593
00:20:22,461 --> 00:20:23,961
And I brought you
some contraband.
594
00:20:23,995 --> 00:20:27,331
Oh, my God, thank you!
Gluten is my favorite food.
595
00:20:27,366 --> 00:20:31,268
Hey, listen, I really wanted
to talk to you about something.
596
00:20:31,302 --> 00:20:33,203
I know you just
started dating somebody,
597
00:20:33,237 --> 00:20:34,371
but...
Wait, what?
598
00:20:34,405 --> 00:20:35,772
Yeah, that midwife
599
00:20:35,773 --> 00:20:37,974
and the lady
from extra! Told me.
600
00:20:38,008 --> 00:20:39,176
And when I heard that,
I thought,
601
00:20:39,177 --> 00:20:40,277
"cliff, you know,
that window is closing,
602
00:20:40,311 --> 00:20:41,811
and you're gonna miss
your chance,"
603
00:20:41,812 --> 00:20:43,647
so I left, and I broke it
off with Heather.
604
00:20:43,681 --> 00:20:45,515
And I know this is a little bit
of a long shot.
605
00:20:45,516 --> 00:20:47,149
I don't know
who this guy is you're dating.
606
00:20:47,150 --> 00:20:48,317
He's probably, like,
a stockbroker
607
00:20:48,318 --> 00:20:49,985
or a race car driver
or something really cool.
608
00:20:50,019 --> 00:20:51,287
No, it's you.
609
00:20:51,288 --> 00:20:52,421
I lied
and said it was you,
610
00:20:52,422 --> 00:20:54,022
because I'm crazy.
What?
611
00:20:54,057 --> 00:20:55,424
He's a stockbroker.
612
00:20:55,425 --> 00:20:56,659
Okay, anyway,
the point is
613
00:20:56,693 --> 00:20:57,993
I don't want you
to be with him,
614
00:20:57,994 --> 00:21:00,196
because I want you
to be with me.
615
00:21:00,230 --> 00:21:02,897
I want me
to be with you too.
616
00:21:02,898 --> 00:21:04,499
Are you serious?
617
00:21:04,533 --> 00:21:07,835
I knew you were
a little bit crazy.
618
00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:22,216
Wait, wait,
I'm not crazy.
619
00:21:22,217 --> 00:21:23,717
Yeah,
you're kind of crazy.
620
00:21:23,718 --> 00:21:27,387
You were talking to a pigeon
when I came out here.
621
00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:37,358
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
622
00:21:37,408 --> 00:21:41,958
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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