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1
00:00:00,532 --> 00:00:02,898
(Mindy) The empire state
building on Valentine's day,
2
00:00:02,899 --> 00:00:04,816
the most romantic building
in the world
3
00:00:04,817 --> 00:00:06,401
on the most romantic day
of the year.
4
00:00:06,452 --> 00:00:09,321
So many memorable romances
have played out here.
5
00:00:09,355 --> 00:00:11,072
Deborah Kerr
and Cary Grant
6
00:00:11,123 --> 00:00:12,757
in an affair to remember.
7
00:00:12,758 --> 00:00:14,759
[As James Cagney] "Give me
a smooch, right on the mug, see?"
8
00:00:14,760 --> 00:00:17,095
I do a pretty spot-on
Cary Grant.
9
00:00:17,096 --> 00:00:20,365
And of course,
the second-best romantic comedy
10
00:00:20,366 --> 00:00:22,267
that Meg Ryan
and tom Hanks ever made:
11
00:00:22,268 --> 00:00:23,935
Sleepless in Seattle.
12
00:00:23,936 --> 00:00:26,238
Every couple weeks,
I buy a ticket
13
00:00:26,239 --> 00:00:28,106
and hang out in the lobby
of the empire state building
14
00:00:28,107 --> 00:00:30,041
to see if I will meet
my one true love.
15
00:00:30,042 --> 00:00:32,911
Captain, she's back.
16
00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:35,463
So you come here regularly
17
00:00:35,498 --> 00:00:37,448
to monitor the base
of the building.
18
00:00:37,466 --> 00:00:38,917
I'm here to meet
that special someone,
19
00:00:38,918 --> 00:00:41,169
and when I do,
we're gonna go to the top,
20
00:00:41,170 --> 00:00:43,154
and then, boom!
Fireworks.
21
00:00:43,189 --> 00:00:44,455
And who is that person?
22
00:00:44,473 --> 00:00:45,724
I haven't met him yet,
23
00:00:45,725 --> 00:00:47,058
but I can tell
when I find him,
24
00:00:47,059 --> 00:00:50,178
we're going to spend
eternity together.
25
00:00:50,179 --> 00:00:51,346
Could you describe him?
26
00:00:51,397 --> 00:00:53,148
All right, well,
he's in his mid-30s.
27
00:00:53,182 --> 00:00:56,818
He is tall, dark,
intense, mysterious...
28
00:00:56,853 --> 00:00:58,403
You understand why
what you're telling us
29
00:00:58,404 --> 00:01:00,155
would cause us
serious concern.
30
00:01:00,156 --> 00:01:01,489
Yeah. I can't help it,
31
00:01:01,524 --> 00:01:03,191
you know,
even though it's dangerous,
32
00:01:03,192 --> 00:01:04,693
because I am
a true believer.
33
00:01:04,744 --> 00:01:07,529
Hey, we're gonna need Miller
from homeland security.
34
00:01:07,580 --> 00:01:08,997
Homeland security?
35
00:01:08,998 --> 00:01:10,198
That's a cool show.
36
00:01:10,249 --> 00:01:11,867
Why do you have a bag
with a passport
37
00:01:11,868 --> 00:01:13,034
and three cell phones?
38
00:01:13,085 --> 00:01:15,120
Okay, well,
this is for the Internet,
39
00:01:15,121 --> 00:01:16,838
this is for texting,
40
00:01:16,839 --> 00:01:19,507
and this flip phone
is because I do not know
41
00:01:19,508 --> 00:01:20,825
how to transfer
my old contacts.
42
00:01:20,843 --> 00:01:23,494
You know, we've been
spending so much time
43
00:01:23,495 --> 00:01:24,829
talking about me
44
00:01:24,830 --> 00:01:27,132
that I haven't
asked you anything.
45
00:01:27,133 --> 00:01:29,684
- What are you into?
- Protecting this building.
46
00:01:29,719 --> 00:01:32,220
Ooh, I love that.
It's so old-fashioned.
47
00:01:32,255 --> 00:01:33,889
You have great facial hair.
48
00:01:33,890 --> 00:01:35,023
I love a guy
with a beard.
49
00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:36,191
Can I touch it?
50
00:01:36,192 --> 00:01:37,675
Hands on the table, please.
51
00:01:37,693 --> 00:01:39,277
Hey, it's cool
if you're into me.
52
00:01:39,278 --> 00:01:41,363
Kevin Garnett once bought me
a coke at a P.F. Chang's.
53
00:01:41,397 --> 00:01:42,781
You're not helping yourself.
54
00:01:42,782 --> 00:01:44,532
I'm just saying
I don't see a wedding ring.
55
00:01:44,567 --> 00:01:48,820
Is there a Mrs. confederated
security solutions?
56
00:01:49,989 --> 00:01:51,356
Oh, my God.
57
00:01:51,357 --> 00:01:53,191
You could've just said yes!
58
00:01:53,209 --> 00:01:56,211
[Upbeat hip-hop music]
59
00:01:56,212 --> 00:02:02,217
[Woman vocalizing]
60
00:02:02,218 --> 00:02:05,503
61
00:02:06,786 --> 00:02:08,746
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.Addic7ed.Com/
62
00:02:10,426 --> 00:02:11,726
Dr. Lahiri,
there's something wrong
63
00:02:11,727 --> 00:02:13,144
with Dr. Castellano.
64
00:02:13,145 --> 00:02:14,729
He might be dead.
What?
65
00:02:14,730 --> 00:02:18,400
There's definitely a smell.
Okay.
66
00:02:18,434 --> 00:02:20,251
Danny... oh, my God.
67
00:02:20,252 --> 00:02:22,153
Holy crap!
What the hell?
68
00:02:22,154 --> 00:02:23,355
[Whack]
Yep?
69
00:02:23,356 --> 00:02:25,674
Danny, get up.
Are you kidding me?
70
00:02:25,708 --> 00:02:27,842
Okay, I'm up.
Put some pants on.
71
00:02:27,843 --> 00:02:29,344
I can see the outline
of your penis.
72
00:02:29,378 --> 00:02:30,545
I know that eye patch
dumped you,
73
00:02:30,546 --> 00:02:33,431
but you can't just spend the night
in your office, drunk,
74
00:02:33,432 --> 00:02:35,550
playing weird Bruce Springsteen
songs on your tiny piano.
75
00:02:35,551 --> 00:02:36,768
Stop that.
76
00:02:36,802 --> 00:02:38,720
What's... oh, God.
I stood up too quick.
77
00:02:38,721 --> 00:02:40,721
This is awful. What's
the matter with you? [Groans]
78
00:02:40,723 --> 00:02:42,807
Your voice
is too loud.
79
00:02:42,841 --> 00:02:44,893
This isn't me.
It's you.
80
00:02:44,944 --> 00:02:46,194
Okay, that is not me.
81
00:02:46,195 --> 00:02:47,312
When I lay on the floor,
it's adorable,
82
00:02:47,313 --> 00:02:48,396
and it is tragic.
83
00:02:48,447 --> 00:02:49,648
When you lay on the floor,
84
00:02:49,649 --> 00:02:51,483
you look like
an upside-down ladybug.
85
00:02:51,517 --> 00:02:53,368
My God, am I the only person
not crawling about
86
00:02:53,369 --> 00:02:54,486
on the floor today?
87
00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:56,354
You guys, I dropped
a Mike and Ike on the floor.
88
00:02:56,355 --> 00:02:57,739
I need all eyes on this.
89
00:02:57,790 --> 00:02:59,324
Danny, you're a grown-up.
Get up.
90
00:02:59,358 --> 00:03:00,408
You're right.
91
00:03:00,409 --> 00:03:01,493
I'm gonna get
myself together.
92
00:03:01,494 --> 00:03:02,827
I'm gonna pull it together.
93
00:03:02,828 --> 00:03:05,080
I'm gonna meet another girl.
It's gonna be good.
94
00:03:05,131 --> 00:03:06,531
I have found that
when I am heartbroken,
95
00:03:06,532 --> 00:03:08,416
it is actually best
to throw myself into work.
96
00:03:08,467 --> 00:03:10,385
Which is why, on Thursday,
I am going to do you
97
00:03:10,419 --> 00:03:12,053
the favor of giving you
all of my patients
98
00:03:12,054 --> 00:03:13,138
for the whole night.
99
00:03:13,172 --> 00:03:14,305
Mindy, it's fine.
100
00:03:14,306 --> 00:03:15,373
I'll look after your patients
on Thursday.
101
00:03:15,374 --> 00:03:16,591
You enjoy
your Valentine's day.
102
00:03:16,592 --> 00:03:18,059
Oh, is Thursday Valentine's day?
Yes. Nice.
103
00:03:18,060 --> 00:03:20,178
I-I hadn't remembered.
Okay.
104
00:03:20,179 --> 00:03:21,379
Wait, how come you,
of all people,
105
00:03:21,380 --> 00:03:22,630
don't have plans
on Valentine's day?
106
00:03:22,665 --> 00:03:24,315
Well, as a man
who's looking to avoid
107
00:03:24,316 --> 00:03:25,600
a committed relationship,
108
00:03:25,601 --> 00:03:27,318
Valentine's day can be
something of a minefield.
109
00:03:27,353 --> 00:03:29,437
"Oh, a dozen roses.
You must really like me."
110
00:03:29,488 --> 00:03:31,156
"Hey, do you want to share
a dessert?"
111
00:03:31,190 --> 00:03:33,274
"Oh, that means you must want to meet
my parents, who live in Minneapolis."
112
00:03:33,325 --> 00:03:34,943
It's an emotional Bosnia.
113
00:03:34,944 --> 00:03:36,444
Think I'll sit it out, thanks.
Well, great.
114
00:03:36,495 --> 00:03:38,663
Then I can have Valentine's day
with Jamie.
115
00:03:38,698 --> 00:03:40,749
As in Jamie and Lucy?
116
00:03:40,750 --> 00:03:41,750
Now, there's a great couple.
117
00:03:41,784 --> 00:03:43,401
Nope,
not as in Jamie and Lucy.
118
00:03:43,402 --> 00:03:44,703
As in Jamie and Mindy.
119
00:03:44,737 --> 00:03:46,504
But aren't you worried
about the incredible chemistry
120
00:03:46,505 --> 00:03:47,539
they seem to have?
121
00:03:47,573 --> 00:03:48,823
They don't have
good chemistry.
122
00:03:48,824 --> 00:03:50,104
I have good chemistry
with Jamie.
123
00:03:50,126 --> 00:03:53,678
I'm really lonely.
124
00:03:53,713 --> 00:03:55,930
(Jamie) Moma was such
a fun idea, Mindy.
125
00:03:55,965 --> 00:03:58,800
I love modern art museums.
Yeah.
126
00:03:58,801 --> 00:04:00,185
I feel like
they're less intimidating
127
00:04:00,186 --> 00:04:02,103
'cause I think
I could do the art.
128
00:04:02,138 --> 00:04:03,638
Oh, you know what?
Your sticker is coming off.
129
00:04:03,639 --> 00:04:04,773
Oh, actually, leave it.
130
00:04:04,774 --> 00:04:05,890
I like people
to know that I had
131
00:04:05,891 --> 00:04:07,142
a more cultural day
than they did.
132
00:04:07,193 --> 00:04:08,860
Oh, it's like the artsy version
of "I voted."
133
00:04:08,861 --> 00:04:10,928
Oh, yes, I have
a ski lift ticket
134
00:04:10,929 --> 00:04:12,397
on my parka
from two years ago.
135
00:04:12,398 --> 00:04:13,565
When you teach Latin
for a living,
136
00:04:13,566 --> 00:04:14,932
it helps to look like
a huge jock sometimes.
137
00:04:14,933 --> 00:04:15,984
Hey, you guys.
138
00:04:15,985 --> 00:04:16,984
Sorry I'm late.
139
00:04:16,986 --> 00:04:18,203
No, not at all.
140
00:04:18,204 --> 00:04:19,954
It turns out
the defendant's gang
141
00:04:19,955 --> 00:04:21,823
had a copy of my home address,
became a thing. What?
142
00:04:21,824 --> 00:04:22,907
- What?
- Oh, my God.
143
00:04:22,941 --> 00:04:24,776
They always threaten me.
Nothing ever pans out.
144
00:04:24,777 --> 00:04:26,995
Can you believe what
this girl deals with? No.
145
00:04:27,046 --> 00:04:29,047
Every day, she looks murderers
in the eye and puts them
146
00:04:29,048 --> 00:04:30,548
in prison for the rest
of their lives.
147
00:04:30,549 --> 00:04:31,883
- Wow.
- So important.
148
00:04:31,917 --> 00:04:33,918
I mean, speaking
of stressful situations,
149
00:04:33,919 --> 00:04:35,086
I delivered a baby
last night.
150
00:04:35,087 --> 00:04:36,254
He did not want
to be born.
151
00:04:36,288 --> 00:04:37,555
He was really mad
at me.
152
00:04:37,556 --> 00:04:39,057
I'm glad he didn't have
my home address.
153
00:04:39,058 --> 00:04:40,363
[Chuckles]
That's really funny.
154
00:04:40,392 --> 00:04:41,760
Hey, seriously, though,
you know,
155
00:04:41,794 --> 00:04:43,478
if you ever fear for your
safety, you still have a key.
156
00:04:43,512 --> 00:04:44,962
If you ever want to stay
at my place,
157
00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:46,064
you know you can, right?
158
00:04:46,065 --> 00:04:48,099
Well, I would rather take on
the Sinaloa cartel
159
00:04:48,133 --> 00:04:50,185
than deal with the water
pressure in this guy's shower.
160
00:04:50,186 --> 00:04:51,903
[Laughs]
It's not that bad.
161
00:04:51,904 --> 00:04:53,104
[Laughs heartily]
It's not that bad.
162
00:04:53,105 --> 00:04:54,439
You're so great.
163
00:04:54,473 --> 00:04:56,274
You should have
a boyfriend.
164
00:04:56,308 --> 00:04:58,193
I would love to meet a cool guy,
except all the guys I meet
165
00:04:58,194 --> 00:05:01,162
are either 19-year-old murderers
or 80-year-old judges.
166
00:05:01,197 --> 00:05:02,747
You know what, I think
I'm gonna find you someone.
167
00:05:02,782 --> 00:05:04,199
No, I really wouldn't try.
Yeah, great.
168
00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,835
This girl is the pickiest dater
I have ever met in my life.
169
00:05:06,869 --> 00:05:08,536
No, no, I'm actually
a very good matchmaker.
170
00:05:08,587 --> 00:05:10,038
Well, I wish you luck,
171
00:05:10,039 --> 00:05:12,257
but no one's ever
good enough for this girl.
172
00:05:12,258 --> 00:05:13,324
So I wouldn't even try.
173
00:05:13,325 --> 00:05:16,010
(Jamie)
So Mindy at the museum...
174
00:05:17,429 --> 00:05:19,180
Ah, Danny.
175
00:05:19,181 --> 00:05:21,099
Tear up that suicide note.
I have great news.
176
00:05:21,133 --> 00:05:22,967
Okay, that wasn't
a suicide note.
177
00:05:22,968 --> 00:05:24,602
I was contesting
a jaywalking ticket.
178
00:05:24,637 --> 00:05:25,937
Oh. I am sorry about that.
179
00:05:25,938 --> 00:05:27,522
Danny, I am going
to set you up on a date.
180
00:05:27,556 --> 00:05:29,891
This morning you said I should
throw myself back into work.
181
00:05:29,892 --> 00:05:31,142
That was, like,
six hours ago, okay?
182
00:05:31,143 --> 00:05:32,343
That's an entire lifetime
for some bugs.
183
00:05:32,344 --> 00:05:33,444
You're gonna love
this girl.
184
00:05:33,479 --> 00:05:35,396
She is pretty.
She is smart.
185
00:05:35,397 --> 00:05:37,448
She owns a motor scooter.
Ah.
186
00:05:37,483 --> 00:05:39,951
It's Lucy.
Lucy of Jamie and Lucy?
187
00:05:39,985 --> 00:05:41,619
They broke up?
I am dating Jamie
188
00:05:41,620 --> 00:05:42,787
of Jamie and Mindy.
189
00:05:42,788 --> 00:05:43,788
We kissed mouths, Danny.
190
00:05:43,823 --> 00:05:44,856
Okay, I don't know.
191
00:05:44,857 --> 00:05:46,124
I just... I don't know
if I'm ready.
192
00:05:46,158 --> 00:05:48,042
Well, you would also
be doing me a huge favor.
193
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:49,627
If you spend time
with Lucy,
194
00:05:49,628 --> 00:05:51,296
then Jamie won't spend
as much time with her.
195
00:05:51,297 --> 00:05:52,463
Also, this is a big deal.
196
00:05:52,464 --> 00:05:53,548
I am setting you up
with someone.
197
00:05:53,549 --> 00:05:54,782
You never set me up
with anybody.
198
00:05:54,817 --> 00:05:56,267
That's not true.
I hooked you up with Reynaldo.
199
00:05:56,268 --> 00:05:58,119
Your garbage man?
Yeah.
200
00:05:58,154 --> 00:06:00,121
He was smokin' hot,
but he was a little pretentious.
201
00:06:00,122 --> 00:06:02,440
A little bit too well read,
if I may say that.
202
00:06:02,441 --> 00:06:03,441
Danny, please do this
for me.
203
00:06:03,459 --> 00:06:04,576
Can I think about it?
Danny!
204
00:06:04,577 --> 00:06:05,660
You are so selfish!
205
00:06:05,711 --> 00:06:06,944
I don't care
if you're depressed!
206
00:06:06,945 --> 00:06:07,945
Just help me out for once!
Okay, stop...
207
00:06:07,963 --> 00:06:09,080
All right.
I am gonna die alone
208
00:06:09,081 --> 00:06:10,465
unless you do this for me.
Stop hitting me.
209
00:06:10,466 --> 00:06:12,834
I'll go on one date
with her, okay?
210
00:06:12,835 --> 00:06:14,135
Are you serious?
One.
211
00:06:14,136 --> 00:06:15,620
Oh, my God, Danny,
thank you. Thank you.
212
00:06:15,621 --> 00:06:16,954
Okay. When everyone's
mean about you,
213
00:06:16,955 --> 00:06:18,473
I defend you
most of the time.
214
00:06:18,474 --> 00:06:19,807
Okay, I'm good
on the hug, though.
215
00:06:19,808 --> 00:06:21,142
Thanks.
To show my gratitude
216
00:06:21,177 --> 00:06:22,594
for this kindness,
217
00:06:22,595 --> 00:06:25,963
we can choose any city
of real housewives to watch.
218
00:06:25,964 --> 00:06:28,013
[Sighs]
Miami.
219
00:06:28,017 --> 00:06:29,033
Yes.
220
00:06:29,068 --> 00:06:31,502
[Women shouting on TV]
221
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:35,348
Deborah, do you like
working in the morgue?
222
00:06:35,349 --> 00:06:37,717
Well, I don't get a lot
of patient complaints.
223
00:06:37,718 --> 00:06:38,801
[Laughs]
224
00:06:38,835 --> 00:06:40,553
It's funny that you work
in the morgue
225
00:06:40,604 --> 00:06:44,340
because my name
is morg-an.
226
00:06:44,341 --> 00:06:48,311
Please wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
227
00:06:48,312 --> 00:06:49,312
Nope.
228
00:06:49,346 --> 00:06:51,314
Nothing. Sorry.
229
00:06:51,348 --> 00:06:53,199
[Sighs]
Uh, Dr. Reed.
230
00:06:53,233 --> 00:06:54,734
Did you see me
hit on that girl?
231
00:06:54,735 --> 00:06:55,868
Unfortunately,
I did, yes.
232
00:06:55,869 --> 00:06:57,853
I've had my eye on her
for a while.
233
00:06:57,854 --> 00:06:58,988
I'm gonna take her
to the batting cages,
234
00:06:58,989 --> 00:07:00,289
if you know what I mean.
235
00:07:00,290 --> 00:07:01,824
Well, let me know
how that doesn't work out.
236
00:07:01,825 --> 00:07:03,076
Okay, here's my plan.
I am going
237
00:07:03,077 --> 00:07:04,961
to put these
in the ladies' room
238
00:07:04,962 --> 00:07:06,529
in all the stalls.
239
00:07:06,547 --> 00:07:08,414
"Me with out go"...
No, no, read it up...
240
00:07:08,415 --> 00:07:09,665
Oh. "Will you go out
with me?"
241
00:07:09,699 --> 00:07:11,634
And then she'll be
like, "what?
242
00:07:11,635 --> 00:07:12,868
Yes."
243
00:07:12,886 --> 00:07:16,091
Morgan, what if somebody uses
the bathroom before her?
244
00:07:16,092 --> 00:07:17,223
Yep, not a good idea.
245
00:07:17,257 --> 00:07:18,707
Plan "B."
246
00:07:18,725 --> 00:07:20,393
Surprise her
in her car tonight.
247
00:07:20,427 --> 00:07:22,095
That's a felony.
Not on Valentine's day.
248
00:07:22,146 --> 00:07:23,729
Doesn't matter what the holiday is.
Check the laws in this country.
249
00:07:23,764 --> 00:07:25,064
I'm not even sure
about that.
250
00:07:25,099 --> 00:07:28,384
[Sighs]
Morgan, wait.
251
00:07:28,402 --> 00:07:30,853
- Maybe I could help you.
- Really?
252
00:07:30,887 --> 00:07:32,772
Oh, God,
that would be so good.
253
00:07:32,823 --> 00:07:33,923
[Banging at door]
254
00:07:33,924 --> 00:07:36,409
Coming, I'm coming.
255
00:07:36,410 --> 00:07:37,410
- Hey.
- Hey.
256
00:07:37,444 --> 00:07:38,945
Why are you so early?
257
00:07:38,996 --> 00:07:40,580
- Ten minutes?
- Yeah.
258
00:07:40,581 --> 00:07:41,747
You're ten minutes
early, Danny,
259
00:07:41,748 --> 00:07:43,366
which is worse
than two hours late.
260
00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:44,534
Those last ten minutes,
261
00:07:44,568 --> 00:07:47,253
that's when I go from "whoa"
to "damn."
262
00:07:47,287 --> 00:07:48,504
Wait a minute.
263
00:07:48,505 --> 00:07:50,906
Why did I have to come
here first, anyways?
264
00:07:50,907 --> 00:07:52,408
Well, you are going
on a date with my friend.
265
00:07:52,426 --> 00:07:53,926
Mm-hmm.
And I wanted to make sure
266
00:07:53,927 --> 00:07:55,595
that you didn't look weird.
267
00:07:55,596 --> 00:07:56,912
You had, like,
a mustache or something.
268
00:07:56,930 --> 00:07:59,415
How would I grow a mustache
since this morning?
269
00:07:59,433 --> 00:08:00,749
I don't know.
I'm not Italian.
270
00:08:00,750 --> 00:08:01,968
Also, it's good
when I'm getting pretty
271
00:08:01,969 --> 00:08:03,136
for there to be a guy here,
so he can be like,
272
00:08:03,137 --> 00:08:06,472
"hurry up! We're gonna be late!"
What?
273
00:08:06,473 --> 00:08:07,513
Why are you looking at me?
274
00:08:07,524 --> 00:08:09,108
Are you sure
you want to wear that?
275
00:08:09,143 --> 00:08:11,611
It being on me implies
that I want to wear it.
276
00:08:11,645 --> 00:08:14,597
Okay. I like it.
277
00:08:16,066 --> 00:08:17,316
Wow.
278
00:08:17,317 --> 00:08:19,768
A whole room
that's a closet?
279
00:08:19,769 --> 00:08:21,037
You could make this
into a little gym,
280
00:08:21,038 --> 00:08:22,271
hang a heavy bag there.
281
00:08:22,272 --> 00:08:23,906
Yeah, Danny,
that's what I want.
282
00:08:23,907 --> 00:08:26,108
I want a bag
full of sand to punch
283
00:08:26,109 --> 00:08:28,578
instead of all my clothes.
284
00:08:28,612 --> 00:08:30,246
Okay, what about this one?
You like that?
285
00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:32,465
Let me guess: You want me
to wear a little black dress,
286
00:08:32,466 --> 00:08:34,300
push-up bra, high heels.
287
00:08:34,301 --> 00:08:36,135
Boring, sexy, anonymous girl.
288
00:08:36,170 --> 00:08:37,336
Sexy's not boring.
289
00:08:37,337 --> 00:08:38,754
You got any food?
Cold cuts?
290
00:08:38,755 --> 00:08:41,140
No, but I think I have
some pizza from election night.
291
00:08:41,175 --> 00:08:44,810
I think this date's
gonna be fun.
292
00:08:44,811 --> 00:08:47,430
Let's take a shot.
You look nice.
293
00:08:47,431 --> 00:08:48,898
- Thanks.
- To...
294
00:08:48,899 --> 00:08:50,233
True love.
Sex with new people.
295
00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:51,484
Danny.
296
00:08:51,518 --> 00:08:52,852
Hey, guys.
297
00:08:52,853 --> 00:08:53,986
- Hi.
- Hey.
298
00:08:53,987 --> 00:08:55,321
Lucy, you remember Danny.
Danny, Lucy.
299
00:08:55,322 --> 00:08:58,007
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
300
00:08:58,008 --> 00:09:00,843
Beautiful.
Oh, man.
301
00:09:00,878 --> 00:09:02,295
What?
302
00:09:02,346 --> 00:09:03,846
That's a king salmon
over there.
303
00:09:03,881 --> 00:09:04,931
So?
304
00:09:04,932 --> 00:09:06,515
Jillian studied the migration
of that fish.
305
00:09:06,516 --> 00:09:07,934
No. Yeah.
That fish goes from salt water...
306
00:09:07,935 --> 00:09:09,135
No. Stop it.
To fresh water.
307
00:09:09,186 --> 00:09:10,770
It's an amazing fish.
308
00:09:10,771 --> 00:09:11,804
They do it to mate.
Nobody cares.
309
00:09:11,805 --> 00:09:12,805
To mate.
Danny, nobody cares.
310
00:09:12,856 --> 00:09:13,890
- Hey.
- Hey, guys?
311
00:09:13,891 --> 00:09:14,891
Is everything okay?
312
00:09:14,925 --> 00:09:16,142
Really good.
313
00:09:16,143 --> 00:09:17,476
Would you mind
switching seats with me?
314
00:09:17,477 --> 00:09:19,445
Because that fish
is in my eye line,
315
00:09:19,446 --> 00:09:21,030
just putting me in a...
316
00:09:21,031 --> 00:09:22,865
A bad place emotionally
right now.
317
00:09:22,900 --> 00:09:24,033
The fish?
318
00:09:24,067 --> 00:09:25,868
That one, yeah.
Yeah?
319
00:09:25,903 --> 00:09:27,320
Yeah, sure. It's your eye line.
Do you mind?
320
00:09:27,371 --> 00:09:29,705
Okay, great.
Thanks.
321
00:09:29,740 --> 00:09:30,739
(Jamie)
Wouldn't want to look
322
00:09:30,741 --> 00:09:31,908
at something
I didn't like.
323
00:09:31,942 --> 00:09:33,876
Oh, yeah, thank you.
That's much better.
324
00:09:33,911 --> 00:09:35,494
Good.
325
00:09:35,545 --> 00:09:38,581
So can I ask what exactly
your problem is
326
00:09:38,582 --> 00:09:39,882
with sea life?
327
00:09:39,883 --> 00:09:42,451
Oh, it's just,
my ex was an oceanographer.
328
00:09:42,452 --> 00:09:43,502
It's stupid.
329
00:09:43,553 --> 00:09:44,552
Yeah, it is stupid.
330
00:09:44,554 --> 00:09:45,888
Hey, look
at this bread selection.
331
00:09:45,889 --> 00:09:47,890
There's white bread.
There's the brown bread.
332
00:09:47,925 --> 00:09:50,343
Just if I keep myself
from seeing triggers,
333
00:09:50,394 --> 00:09:51,727
then, you know,
334
00:09:51,762 --> 00:09:52,761
I don't fixate on her...
335
00:09:52,763 --> 00:09:53,896
Ow!
336
00:09:53,931 --> 00:09:55,398
Did somebody
just kick me?
337
00:09:55,432 --> 00:09:56,565
You okay? Ow!
338
00:09:56,566 --> 00:09:57,650
(Mindy)
Yeah, that is so weird.
339
00:09:57,684 --> 00:09:59,402
I think that maybe
we should move tables,
340
00:09:59,403 --> 00:10:01,520
or we could try
not talking about exes
341
00:10:01,521 --> 00:10:03,639
and see if the kicking stops.
You know what, though?
342
00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:05,908
I have found
that the hardest breakups
343
00:10:05,909 --> 00:10:07,243
are the ones
where you might have
344
00:10:07,277 --> 00:10:09,078
underestimated the person
while you were with them,
345
00:10:09,112 --> 00:10:10,312
I don't know if...
346
00:10:10,313 --> 00:10:12,081
Yes. That's exactly
what I'm going through.
347
00:10:12,115 --> 00:10:14,149
- Really?
- Yes.
348
00:10:14,150 --> 00:10:15,317
It... it's like you're...
349
00:10:15,318 --> 00:10:16,535
[Laughs]
I know, it's so weird.
350
00:10:16,586 --> 00:10:17,987
That's exactly what
is going on
351
00:10:17,988 --> 00:10:19,538
with me and Jillian.
No way.
352
00:10:19,589 --> 00:10:21,123
Well, it was me, really.
I just...
353
00:10:21,124 --> 00:10:22,258
Tell me about that.
354
00:10:22,292 --> 00:10:23,659
- Uh, Jamie?
- Yeah.
355
00:10:23,660 --> 00:10:24,794
I don't want
to jinx this,
356
00:10:24,795 --> 00:10:26,379
but I think
match-dot-Mindy
357
00:10:26,380 --> 00:10:27,546
might have
another success story.
358
00:10:27,597 --> 00:10:29,765
You know, you can have
a friendship, maybe.
359
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:31,684
Yeah?
360
00:10:31,718 --> 00:10:32,868
So, Morgan,
you want to take
361
00:10:32,903 --> 00:10:34,203
this girl
to the batting cages.
362
00:10:34,204 --> 00:10:35,388
I'm still not sure
what those are.
363
00:10:35,439 --> 00:10:36,939
Three-pronged attack,
Morgan.
364
00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:38,641
Number one, casual approach.
365
00:10:38,642 --> 00:10:39,892
Watch me, watch me,
watch me.
366
00:10:39,893 --> 00:10:41,277
What am I doing?
What am I doing?
367
00:10:41,278 --> 00:10:42,311
What am I doing?
I don't know what you're gonna...
368
00:10:42,312 --> 00:10:43,646
Now.
369
00:10:43,647 --> 00:10:45,064
Wow, okay, you look
like Joe Biden.
370
00:10:45,065 --> 00:10:46,232
That is awesome.
371
00:10:46,283 --> 00:10:49,652
Number two, initiate
some light physical contact.
372
00:10:49,653 --> 00:10:50,653
- Okay.
- Oh, red.
373
00:10:50,687 --> 00:10:51,954
Nice color.
Oh, yeah.
374
00:10:51,955 --> 00:10:53,456
It's Valentine's day,
and it hides the blood.
375
00:10:53,490 --> 00:10:56,742
That's disgusting. Number three.
Offer her something small.
376
00:10:56,743 --> 00:10:58,828
A token of sorts.
It establishes a debt.
377
00:10:58,862 --> 00:11:01,247
Got a free cola
from the vending machine.
378
00:11:01,298 --> 00:11:03,416
Oh, I've actually been staring
at that thing all morning.
379
00:11:03,417 --> 00:11:05,751
Thanks, doc.
I owe you one.
380
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:07,753
Oh! It's a...
Part of the routine.
381
00:11:07,754 --> 00:11:08,921
- There it is.
- Okay.
382
00:11:08,922 --> 00:11:09,972
It's the debt.
I got it.
383
00:11:10,007 --> 00:11:11,687
You just give her
whatever you have on you.
384
00:11:11,708 --> 00:11:13,009
Why not?
All right.
385
00:11:13,010 --> 00:11:17,063
So I'll be like,
"hey, this is for you."
386
00:11:18,815 --> 00:11:19,932
Where's the body?
387
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,383
I just found the head
in the toilet.
388
00:11:21,384 --> 00:11:22,768
Oh, God.
389
00:11:22,819 --> 00:11:24,720
You never know
a love song
390
00:11:24,721 --> 00:11:25,938
until you have
a broken heart, right?
391
00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,239
Mm, yes.
392
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,025
And finally you realize
that all of these songs
393
00:11:29,059 --> 00:11:30,409
that you thought
were so happy-sounding
394
00:11:30,410 --> 00:11:31,744
are actually so sad.
395
00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,279
Like you can call me Al.
Mm.
396
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:35,448
"Where is my wife
and family?
397
00:11:35,449 --> 00:11:36,782
What if I die here?"
398
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:38,584
Who'll be my role model
now that my... once my...
399
00:11:38,585 --> 00:11:40,119
(Both)
Role model's gone?
400
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,504
Man, I gotta download
that album again. Mm-hmm.
401
00:11:41,505 --> 00:11:42,505
It's a great one.
402
00:11:42,539 --> 00:11:44,073
I think they really like
each other.
403
00:11:44,074 --> 00:11:45,374
Well, they like Paul Simon.
404
00:11:45,375 --> 00:11:46,575
So does everyone else
on the planet.
405
00:11:46,576 --> 00:11:48,019
No, it's like
we're not even here.
406
00:11:48,020 --> 00:11:49,128
Hey, guys.
407
00:11:49,179 --> 00:11:50,429
Hey, there's four
of us here.
408
00:11:50,430 --> 00:11:51,514
So let's try to...
Oh.
409
00:11:51,548 --> 00:11:53,265
Sorry.
Oh, it's okay.
410
00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:55,518
Danny was just
helping me
411
00:11:55,519 --> 00:11:57,520
figure out where I should get
my first tattoo.
412
00:11:57,521 --> 00:11:58,604
Uh-oh.
[Clears throat]
413
00:11:58,638 --> 00:12:00,856
Um, you hate tattoos.
414
00:12:00,891 --> 00:12:02,074
I don't think so.
415
00:12:02,075 --> 00:12:03,992
I think I'm gonna get
a tattoo as we.
416
00:12:03,993 --> 00:12:05,661
A little butterfly
on the nape of my neck,
417
00:12:05,662 --> 00:12:07,263
and it would signify
that I'm a free spirit...
418
00:12:07,264 --> 00:12:08,531
What tattoo
are you gonna get?
419
00:12:08,532 --> 00:12:11,684
Well, I think I should
keep it a secret,
420
00:12:11,685 --> 00:12:12,768
because where I want
to get it,
421
00:12:12,769 --> 00:12:14,169
only certain people
would see it.
422
00:12:14,187 --> 00:12:16,605
I-I don't know, Luce.
423
00:12:16,606 --> 00:12:18,808
I worry that a tattoo
is a little short-sighted.
424
00:12:18,842 --> 00:12:20,526
You know?
Mmm. Can I try that?
425
00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:21,894
Is your grandson
really gonna understand
426
00:12:21,945 --> 00:12:23,562
why you have
a radiohead lyric
427
00:12:23,613 --> 00:12:25,064
under your belly button?
428
00:12:25,066 --> 00:12:26,148
I can't understand
radiohead now.
429
00:12:26,182 --> 00:12:27,400
Mmm!
430
00:12:27,451 --> 00:12:29,618
Do you wanna have some
of my COD?
431
00:12:29,619 --> 00:12:31,370
I'm fine.
I just had some.
432
00:12:31,405 --> 00:12:34,206
Wow, that lamb
is so, mmm, succulent.
433
00:12:34,241 --> 00:12:35,658
(Danny)
It is succulent.
434
00:12:35,692 --> 00:12:37,326
You are such a good orderer.
Thank you.
435
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,027
Pick a good restaurant,
and they say, you know,
436
00:12:39,028 --> 00:12:40,162
the food
orders itself, so...
437
00:12:40,196 --> 00:12:42,548
Mmm, try this.
Okay.
438
00:12:42,582 --> 00:12:44,032
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
Lucy!
439
00:12:44,050 --> 00:12:45,501
- Your cold.
- Hmm?
440
00:12:45,535 --> 00:12:46,702
She had this horrible cold
last week.
441
00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:47,753
I'm good with it.
I'll take it.
442
00:12:47,754 --> 00:12:49,004
You might
get something.
443
00:12:49,005 --> 00:12:50,423
I'm not sick.
Do you want some of my COD?
444
00:12:50,474 --> 00:12:51,807
I don't get sick that often.
I don't have a cold.
445
00:12:51,808 --> 00:12:52,808
- You don't?
- No.
446
00:12:52,809 --> 00:12:54,042
Eat off my fork.
It's romantic.
447
00:12:54,043 --> 00:12:55,644
I don't need it.
I'm not hungry.
448
00:12:55,645 --> 00:12:57,430
Eat off my fork, please.
449
00:12:57,481 --> 00:12:58,898
Isn't that good?
450
00:12:58,932 --> 00:13:01,016
[Choking]
451
00:13:01,050 --> 00:13:02,067
You all right, buddy?
452
00:13:02,102 --> 00:13:03,736
It was just
a little piece of COD.
453
00:13:03,770 --> 00:13:05,053
I'm so sorry.
It's got bones in it. That's why.
454
00:13:05,071 --> 00:13:06,188
Hey, Jamie?
Are you good?
455
00:13:06,189 --> 00:13:07,239
You choking, buddy?
456
00:13:07,274 --> 00:13:08,441
They're doctors.
You should just...
457
00:13:08,492 --> 00:13:09,658
Okay?
[Mouths words]
458
00:13:09,659 --> 00:13:11,360
You sure?
459
00:13:11,361 --> 00:13:12,661
I'm gonna...
It has bones in it.
460
00:13:12,662 --> 00:13:13,896
I can Heimlich. I know.
Please let me Heimlich you.
461
00:13:13,914 --> 00:13:15,414
(Mindy)
Okay.
462
00:13:15,415 --> 00:13:17,583
I'm not gonna let you die
in this weird restaurant, Jamie.
463
00:13:17,617 --> 00:13:19,201
Should we get dessert?
464
00:13:19,235 --> 00:13:21,036
(Danny)
I think he's choking.
465
00:13:21,037 --> 00:13:22,738
(Lucy) No, he's okay. [All gasp]
466
00:13:22,756 --> 00:13:24,039
Jamie, stop!
[Grunting]
467
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:25,124
Jamie!
468
00:13:25,175 --> 00:13:26,258
- Oh.
- Oh, boy.
469
00:13:26,293 --> 00:13:28,761
Jamie, please stop
doing that!
470
00:13:28,795 --> 00:13:30,379
Hey, guys,
don't worry about it.
471
00:13:30,380 --> 00:13:31,747
She's a doctor.
She's got it.
472
00:13:31,765 --> 00:13:35,017
[Choking]
473
00:13:38,025 --> 00:13:40,509
I just don't understand
why, in 2013,
474
00:13:40,510 --> 00:13:42,028
restaurants have any bones
in their fish.
475
00:13:42,062 --> 00:13:43,529
And while I appreciate
the gift certificate
476
00:13:43,530 --> 00:13:44,680
as a gesture,
477
00:13:44,698 --> 00:13:46,282
I did think the manager
was passive-aggressive,
478
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:47,349
the way that he gave it.
479
00:13:47,350 --> 00:13:48,350
You remember that?
480
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:49,736
Hey, you know what?
481
00:13:49,737 --> 00:13:51,371
I think I'm gonna
call it a night, Jamie.
482
00:13:51,405 --> 00:13:52,488
You almost died.
483
00:13:52,522 --> 00:13:54,374
My shoes are pinching me.
484
00:13:54,408 --> 00:13:56,159
- So...
- No. No. No.
485
00:13:56,193 --> 00:13:57,460
We're gonna continue
this date.
486
00:13:57,494 --> 00:14:00,129
I am gonna take you
to the most romantic place
487
00:14:00,130 --> 00:14:01,530
in all of New York City.
488
00:14:01,548 --> 00:14:03,800
And possibly the world.
489
00:14:03,834 --> 00:14:05,968
(Man)
Keep moving, guys.
490
00:14:06,003 --> 00:14:09,055
Please,
keep the line moving.
491
00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:10,923
Jamie, I cannot believe
you took me
492
00:14:10,924 --> 00:14:13,843
to the empire state building
for Valentine's day.
493
00:14:13,877 --> 00:14:15,377
Last year,
the guy I was with,
494
00:14:15,378 --> 00:14:16,679
he took me
to an Indian casino,
495
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:18,147
and I lost $2,000.
496
00:14:18,148 --> 00:14:19,548
[Chuckles]
Well, this is actually
497
00:14:19,549 --> 00:14:20,733
something I've
always wanted to do.
498
00:14:20,768 --> 00:14:23,403
And I figured I'd come
with the perfect person
499
00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:24,487
on the perfect night.
500
00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,487
[Elevator dings]
501
00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:27,490
Next, please.
502
00:14:27,491 --> 00:14:29,058
Wait, wait. Jamie.
503
00:14:29,059 --> 00:14:31,611
Um, before we go
into the most romantic building
504
00:14:31,612 --> 00:14:33,162
on the entire planet...
Yeah.
505
00:14:33,163 --> 00:14:34,396
Can you just tell
me one thing? Yeah.
506
00:14:34,397 --> 00:14:37,366
Just... you're not in love
with Lucy, are you?
507
00:14:37,367 --> 00:14:38,451
Next, please.
508
00:14:38,452 --> 00:14:39,836
Why do you keep saying
things like that?
509
00:14:39,870 --> 00:14:41,671
It just seems like
you were really jealous
510
00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:42,712
of her and Danny
at dinner.
511
00:14:42,739 --> 00:14:44,340
Okay, I'm not jealous
of a guy
512
00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:45,558
who wears boot cut jeans,
all right?
513
00:14:45,609 --> 00:14:46,692
See? That sounds jealous.
514
00:14:46,727 --> 00:14:48,111
Lucy is my best friend.
515
00:14:48,112 --> 00:14:49,345
Next.
And if I love her,
516
00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:50,707
it's the way I would love
a sister.
517
00:14:50,731 --> 00:14:53,232
I have a brother, and if rishi
looked at me that way,
518
00:14:53,233 --> 00:14:54,400
I would have to talk
to our dad.
519
00:14:54,451 --> 00:14:56,119
Next, next!
520
00:14:56,153 --> 00:14:57,520
Let's go, lady.
Come on.
521
00:14:57,521 --> 00:14:58,854
Okay, we're trying to sort
something out right now.
522
00:14:58,855 --> 00:14:59,906
All right? Can you just give me
a break here?
523
00:14:59,907 --> 00:15:01,357
Just look
into your lover's eyes.
524
00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:02,909
It's Valentine's day,
for God's sake. Come on.
525
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:04,210
Quick scenario, okay?
526
00:15:04,211 --> 00:15:06,712
You are on death row
because you murdered a cop.
527
00:15:06,747 --> 00:15:08,464
What?
This is hypothetical.
528
00:15:08,465 --> 00:15:09,999
You can only see one more person
before they electrocute you.
529
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,000
Who would it be?
530
00:15:11,001 --> 00:15:12,135
My lawyer
531
00:15:12,136 --> 00:15:13,336
because I wouldn't do
something like that.
532
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:14,554
Okay, your lawyer
bungled the case,
533
00:15:14,555 --> 00:15:16,923
and you have one person
to see before you die.
534
00:15:16,974 --> 00:15:19,759
You can say me
if it's me.
535
00:15:25,265 --> 00:15:28,484
It's Lucy.
536
00:15:28,485 --> 00:15:29,652
I knew it.
537
00:15:29,686 --> 00:15:30,903
You're good at this.
538
00:15:30,938 --> 00:15:32,271
It's Lucy!
539
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:34,106
I'm in love with Lucy!
540
00:15:34,158 --> 00:15:36,025
[Crowd exclaiming happily]
541
00:15:36,059 --> 00:15:37,326
No, no, no, it's okay.
Don't...
542
00:15:37,327 --> 00:15:38,411
I'm not Lucy.
543
00:15:38,445 --> 00:15:39,779
[All groaning sadly]
544
00:15:39,830 --> 00:15:40,863
No, I mean, it's not...
545
00:15:40,864 --> 00:15:41,863
It's not, like,
traumatizing.
546
00:15:41,865 --> 00:15:43,166
It's okay. It's not...
547
00:15:43,167 --> 00:15:44,200
It's just...
I'm okay with it.
548
00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,918
[Crowd murmuring]
549
00:15:45,953 --> 00:15:47,286
Okay, folks. Next.
550
00:15:47,337 --> 00:15:48,621
Come on, let's go.
551
00:15:48,672 --> 00:15:51,707
I'm a man in love!
552
00:15:51,708 --> 00:15:53,742
[Groans]
Oh, my God!
553
00:15:53,743 --> 00:15:54,844
Jamie!
554
00:15:54,878 --> 00:15:56,345
This has not been
a good day for you.
555
00:15:56,346 --> 00:15:57,463
Okay, all right.
556
00:15:57,514 --> 00:15:59,015
That's it, Morgan.
557
00:15:59,016 --> 00:16:01,601
Casual approach.
558
00:16:01,602 --> 00:16:02,685
Okay, good.
559
00:16:02,719 --> 00:16:04,103
Now some light contact.
560
00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:06,355
Light.
561
00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:07,523
What are you doing?
562
00:16:07,558 --> 00:16:09,308
Morgan, human touching,
not dog touching.
563
00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:11,227
Agh.
564
00:16:11,228 --> 00:16:14,197
Good... good...
Good recovery, I guess.
565
00:16:14,198 --> 00:16:15,648
Now parting gift,
parting gift.
566
00:16:15,649 --> 00:16:17,450
Come on, Morgan.
Come on.
567
00:16:17,484 --> 00:16:19,952
Oh, he found the body.
568
00:16:19,953 --> 00:16:22,238
She's into it.
Who knew? Okay.
569
00:16:22,239 --> 00:16:23,739
I... it worked!
570
00:16:23,773 --> 00:16:25,608
Bravo, Morgan!
Bravo.
571
00:16:25,609 --> 00:16:28,110
Hey, man, I'm working here. Sorry.
572
00:16:29,296 --> 00:16:31,047
You finally came
for me, love!
573
00:16:31,048 --> 00:16:32,915
Okay, shh.
You finally called my name!
574
00:16:32,949 --> 00:16:34,166
Shh. Come on, come on.
575
00:16:34,167 --> 00:16:35,635
You're gonna wake up
my neighbors.
576
00:16:35,669 --> 00:16:37,670
I can't believe this is
all because of you.
577
00:16:37,671 --> 00:16:38,888
You showed me that love
578
00:16:38,889 --> 00:16:40,423
was right in front
579
00:16:40,424 --> 00:16:41,474
of my face.
580
00:16:41,508 --> 00:16:42,725
All right,
that's so great.
581
00:16:42,759 --> 00:16:44,343
I never thought I would feel
this way, Mindy.
582
00:16:44,394 --> 00:16:45,678
We can just walk.
It is great.
583
00:16:45,679 --> 00:16:46,812
And not dance and stuff.
584
00:16:46,847 --> 00:16:48,382
I've never done
anything like this.
585
00:16:48,398 --> 00:16:49,482
[Slosh]
Okay.
586
00:16:49,483 --> 00:16:50,633
The whole time.
Disgusting, water on my...
587
00:16:50,634 --> 00:16:51,817
It's all because of you.
588
00:16:51,818 --> 00:16:53,486
You are such
an important character
589
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:54,803
in the story
of Lucy and me.
590
00:16:54,804 --> 00:16:56,439
Don't you realize that?
591
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:57,740
Yeah.
You're fate's helper.
592
00:16:57,774 --> 00:16:59,275
I'm like
the Joan Cusack character
593
00:16:59,276 --> 00:17:01,577
in the romantic comedy
of your life, yeah.
594
00:17:01,612 --> 00:17:03,246
Yes!
I can't believe it.
595
00:17:03,247 --> 00:17:04,480
Can you believe
this is me?
596
00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:05,748
People are gonna think
you're on drugs.
597
00:17:05,749 --> 00:17:06,916
I'm in love!
Stop it, Jamie.
598
00:17:06,950 --> 00:17:09,418
I'm flying.
599
00:17:11,338 --> 00:17:13,289
Oh, my God.
600
00:17:17,111 --> 00:17:19,922
Hey! What the hell,
you guys?
601
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:21,640
Hey, what's going on,
love birds?
602
00:17:21,675 --> 00:17:23,009
Actually,
we kind of broke up.
603
00:17:23,010 --> 00:17:25,210
And, for the record,
there is no kissing on my stoop.
604
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,013
That is a direct quote
from my super.
605
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:28,681
Okay, well, I left my gloves
at your place.
606
00:17:28,682 --> 00:17:29,932
So I just came here
to pick them up.
607
00:17:29,983 --> 00:17:31,934
Did you think you would find
them inside of her mouth?
608
00:17:31,985 --> 00:17:34,153
You're making out
with this guy?
609
00:17:34,187 --> 00:17:36,155
This guy, they ask
if he wanted a cocktail,
610
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:37,239
and he ordered shrimp?
611
00:17:37,274 --> 00:17:39,942
Why are you yelling?
Because I love you!
612
00:17:42,446 --> 00:17:45,281
Really?
613
00:17:49,002 --> 00:17:50,036
Okay, wait a minute.
614
00:17:50,070 --> 00:17:51,403
I love you too!
615
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,289
Whoa, whoa, guys, we were
just kissing a second ago.
616
00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:55,591
All right, I'm gonna call it
a night and head in.
617
00:17:55,625 --> 00:17:56,959
Pardon me.
God, I've been dreaming about this
618
00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:58,427
for 15 years!
619
00:17:58,428 --> 00:18:00,079
Okay, can I... what made
you change your mind?
620
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:01,246
Can I squeeze by here?
My life flashed before my eyes
621
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:02,548
when I was choking.
622
00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,083
Just... it suddenly dawned on me.
Excuse me.
623
00:18:04,101 --> 00:18:05,601
Not to be a stickler,
624
00:18:05,602 --> 00:18:06,802
but I-I was the person
625
00:18:06,803 --> 00:18:08,253
who helped make it
dawn on you.
626
00:18:08,271 --> 00:18:09,522
Mindy helped. She was like
a supporting character.
627
00:18:09,523 --> 00:18:10,723
Oh, thank you!
628
00:18:10,724 --> 00:18:12,141
Let's take a walk.
Let's just get outta here.
629
00:18:12,142 --> 00:18:13,926
That's the weirdest thing
I've ever seen.
630
00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:15,778
You know, I feel like if I had
just worn the first dress,
631
00:18:15,779 --> 00:18:17,196
that this wouldn't
have been the situation.
632
00:18:17,197 --> 00:18:20,432
I don't think
that's the problem.
633
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:22,368
Hey, Dr. Reed.
Morgan.
634
00:18:22,369 --> 00:18:24,703
I'm gonna go pick up
three or four calzones
635
00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,372
and crawl into bed.
636
00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:27,940
Who am I kidding?
It's gonna be four.
637
00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:29,291
What happened?
Did you strike out?
638
00:18:29,292 --> 00:18:31,210
Ha. My first sports analogy.
639
00:18:31,211 --> 00:18:32,378
I had her right
where I wanted her.
640
00:18:32,379 --> 00:18:33,629
And then, bam!
641
00:18:33,630 --> 00:18:35,831
She dumps me
literally the second
642
00:18:35,832 --> 00:18:36,949
we're finished having sex.
643
00:18:36,967 --> 00:18:38,450
Whoa, whoa, wait.
644
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:39,718
What... sex?
645
00:18:39,719 --> 00:18:40,920
I did everything
you told me.
646
00:18:40,921 --> 00:18:41,954
I was playing it cool.
647
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,556
She pulls me
into a supply closet.
648
00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:46,092
We start having sex
in front of a bunch of mops.
649
00:18:46,093 --> 00:18:47,593
You got exactly
what you wanted.
650
00:18:47,594 --> 00:18:49,762
I wanted to take her
to the batting cages.
651
00:18:49,763 --> 00:18:51,230
I mean, you got the good stuff
without the boring stuff.
652
00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:52,464
Home run.
653
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:53,566
Did it again.
654
00:18:53,567 --> 00:18:55,467
The batting cages
is the good stuff.
655
00:18:55,485 --> 00:18:57,770
I don't want to have sex
with someone I care about
656
00:18:57,771 --> 00:18:58,804
in a mop closet.
657
00:18:58,805 --> 00:19:00,305
I want to do it
the right way.
658
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:01,657
On the couch,
in the living room,
659
00:19:01,658 --> 00:19:02,741
after grandmother's asleep.
660
00:19:02,742 --> 00:19:04,743
Morgan, I'm so sorry.
661
00:19:04,744 --> 00:19:05,911
I need to make this
up to you.
662
00:19:05,912 --> 00:19:08,313
I feel like
I've led you astray.
663
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:09,481
A stray?
664
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,117
Where is he?
[Groans]
665
00:19:11,118 --> 00:19:12,317
We're gonna find him.
666
00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:16,155
How'd he get in the building?
[Whistles]
667
00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:17,289
Another one,
another one.
668
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:18,674
You gotta choke up.
Don't get tired.
669
00:19:18,675 --> 00:19:20,993
You can't quit.
We don't quit in America.
670
00:19:21,011 --> 00:19:22,261
Whoa.
671
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:23,379
Check on that, Morgan.
672
00:19:23,380 --> 00:19:25,798
Show me how you did
that weird swing.
673
00:19:25,799 --> 00:19:27,933
I want to try that.
That's pretty bad-ass.
674
00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:29,785
You got, like, a Michael Caine,
Gary Sheffield...
675
00:19:29,786 --> 00:19:31,003
Oh! Oh, God!
676
00:19:31,004 --> 00:19:32,154
Right in the car keys.
677
00:19:32,189 --> 00:19:34,590
Oh! Oh, ho, ho!
678
00:19:34,591 --> 00:19:36,842
Oh!
[Sobbing]
679
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:39,178
Danny, I was this close
680
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:41,280
to spending Valentine's day
at the empire state building.
681
00:19:41,281 --> 00:19:42,815
To put that in you terms,
682
00:19:42,816 --> 00:19:44,033
that's like losing
your virginity
683
00:19:44,034 --> 00:19:45,117
at Yankee stadium.
684
00:19:45,118 --> 00:19:46,518
See, that's your problem.
685
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:47,953
Yeah, no, that's what
I'm doing, Danny.
686
00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:49,455
I'm describing my problem.
687
00:19:49,456 --> 00:19:51,540
Who told you the empire state
building was romantic?
688
00:19:51,541 --> 00:19:53,459
A postcard
at the airport gift shop?
689
00:19:53,460 --> 00:19:55,194
Some dumb movie
with tom Hanks
690
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:57,246
where he's hugging in the rain
and there's no umbrellas?
691
00:19:57,247 --> 00:19:59,331
You know what?
Come here.
692
00:19:59,332 --> 00:20:00,365
I want to show you something.
693
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:03,802
[Big band music playing]
694
00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:04,870
This is it.
695
00:20:04,888 --> 00:20:06,138
Oh, cool.
696
00:20:06,139 --> 00:20:08,641
Your favorite pizza place.
697
00:20:08,642 --> 00:20:10,542
Yeah, Danny,
this does cheer me up.
698
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:12,094
Okay, I'm ready to go.
No, no, no.
699
00:20:12,095 --> 00:20:13,929
I want to show you something.
Sit down.
700
00:20:13,930 --> 00:20:15,881
Sal, can we get two slices?
You got it.
701
00:20:15,899 --> 00:20:17,933
This, like, a setting
from goodfellas or something?
702
00:20:17,934 --> 00:20:20,219
No, this is
where I met my wife.
703
00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:21,353
- What?
- Yep.
704
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:23,107
Here?
Yeah. Check this out.
705
00:20:23,108 --> 00:20:24,173
I wanna show you this.
706
00:20:24,174 --> 00:20:25,441
[Gasps]
707
00:20:25,442 --> 00:20:26,759
Danny, you little felon.
708
00:20:26,793 --> 00:20:29,311
That's awesome.
Her name was Christina?
709
00:20:29,312 --> 00:20:30,311
Yep.
710
00:20:30,313 --> 00:20:31,514
Were you ever like...
711
00:20:31,515 --> 00:20:32,565
[Italian accent]
"Eh, Christina,
712
00:20:32,566 --> 00:20:35,568
I love you so much-a."
713
00:20:35,569 --> 00:20:36,902
Yeah.
714
00:20:36,903 --> 00:20:38,988
Oh.
715
00:20:38,989 --> 00:20:40,523
[Chuckles]
716
00:20:40,524 --> 00:20:43,025
I think I still
really miss her.
717
00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,393
Well, now you can...
718
00:20:44,427 --> 00:20:45,611
What are you doing?
719
00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:46,695
Why do you need
to take a picture of everything?
720
00:20:46,696 --> 00:20:48,864
So that you always remember it
and you never forget.
721
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,649
Stop it.
I want to show Morgan.
722
00:20:50,650 --> 00:20:51,700
No, don't...
723
00:20:51,701 --> 00:20:52,918
We can tell him
about it, okay?
724
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,820
Look, look, the most romantic
place in the world,
725
00:20:54,821 --> 00:20:57,006
you don't know it's gonna be
romantic ahead of time.
726
00:20:57,007 --> 00:20:58,707
Like, for you,
it could be anywhere.
727
00:20:58,708 --> 00:21:00,759
Like a barbershop
728
00:21:00,794 --> 00:21:03,128
or an ATM shelter
729
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:04,380
or h&r block.
730
00:21:04,381 --> 00:21:06,599
Danny, I'm pretty sure
it's gonna be
731
00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:07,850
the empire state building,
732
00:21:07,851 --> 00:21:09,268
but those are
very cute suggestions.
733
00:21:09,269 --> 00:21:11,136
By the way, eye patch
was wrong about you.
734
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:12,855
You're not mean.
735
00:21:12,856 --> 00:21:14,473
She just didn't know you
well enough.
736
00:21:14,474 --> 00:21:15,691
There you go, Danny.
737
00:21:15,725 --> 00:21:18,394
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
738
00:21:18,395 --> 00:21:19,478
Thanks.
739
00:21:19,479 --> 00:21:20,779
Hey, how the...
How is the pizza here?
740
00:21:20,814 --> 00:21:21,981
Worst pizza
in the city.
741
00:21:21,982 --> 00:21:23,566
Oh.
742
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:27,036
Happy Valentine's day.
Happy Valentine's day.
743
00:21:27,037 --> 00:21:29,705
Just want to take
only the crust.
744
00:21:29,706 --> 00:21:31,624
The crust
is my favorite part.
745
00:21:31,625 --> 00:21:33,375
You're so weird.
746
00:21:33,410 --> 00:21:35,377
(Man)
Go to bed.
747
00:21:35,502 --> 00:21:39,481
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.Addic7ed.Com/
748
00:21:39,531 --> 00:21:44,081
Repair and Synchronization by
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