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1
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Oh, my.
2
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How on earth do you find anything in this mess?
3
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I know my homework looks disorganized, but I have a logical system.
4
00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:13,690
What part of your logical homework system is a coupon for Popeye's Chicken?
5
00:00:13,690 --> 00:00:21,070
Well, I am a chicken when it comes to taking science tests, so, what better bookmark to have than a chicken coupon?
6
00:00:21,070 --> 00:00:23,450
Oh, ten pieces for seven ninety-nine.
7
00:00:23,450 --> 00:00:26,820
Sabrina, I need to get you organized.
8
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You'll need dividers, coloured markers, accordion file, label maker and a jumbo paperclip.
9
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I have everything upstairs.
10
00:00:34,790 --> 00:00:37,080
You are so lucky you came to me.
11
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:40,920
Some people win the lottery, I have an aunt who collects office supplies.
12
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Hey, Sabrina.
13
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What are you doing?
14
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:48,350
Oh, I just came over to ask Aunt Zelda for some help with my physiology homework, and she decided I need to get organized.
15
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She went upstairs for supplies.
16
00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:51,810
Quick, I'll distract her while you make your getaway.
17
00:00:53,980 --> 00:00:57,650
Aunt Hilda, is it just me, or have you noticed that Aunt Zelda's just a tad compulsive?
18
00:00:57,650 --> 00:00:58,440
A tad?
19
00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:01,860
She rearranged my sock drawer according to county of origin.
20
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Doesn't that bug you?
21
00:01:03,610 --> 00:01:04,280
Oh, sure.
22
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:06,660
But you just have to find little ways to amuse yourself.
23
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Watch this.
24
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OK, I think we have everything we.
25
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,450
something's wrong.
26
00:01:14,450 --> 00:01:17,960
This room is totally out of balance.
27
00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:18,960
No, it isn�t.
28
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Sabrina, is anything out of balance?
29
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Only Aunt Zelda.
30
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Have you got everything straight?
31
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Hu-hu.
32
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Are you sure?
33
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Don�t worry, Barn, anybody does any law breaking I�ll nab them and sack them right there in number one.
34
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That�s not number one!
35
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That�s number two!
36
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One, two!
37
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Can someone explain to me why we�ve stayed up till four in the morning to watch twelve continuous hours of Andy Griffith?
38
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Because Mayberry is a microcosm of the human condition.
39
00:02:34,490 --> 00:02:38,410
How does the insecure Barney cope working in the shadow of an icon like Andy?
40
00:02:38,410 --> 00:02:42,210
What are the long term effects of Opie growing up without his two front teeth?
41
00:02:42,210 --> 00:02:45,920
And did aunt Bee never marry because she secretly worked for the CIA?
42
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I just like watching Goomer and Goober.
43
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All I know is I�ve got a psyche test at eight thirty.
44
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I�m going to sleep.
45
00:02:52,970 --> 00:02:55,140
Hey everybody, what�s going on?
46
00:02:55,140 --> 00:02:57,140
We�ve all got class in the morning.
47
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We�re going to bed.
48
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Before sunrise?
49
00:02:59,690 --> 00:03:03,560
As your RA, I am very disappointed in your lack of college spirit.
50
00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:04,650
You have a point.
51
00:03:04,650 --> 00:03:08,360
I mean, if I wanted to live by the rules I�d be at home with my aunt Zelda helping her colour code the condiments.
52
00:03:08,360 --> 00:03:09,700
That�s true.
53
00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:14,870
We�re adults now, we can be spontaneous, do whatever we want.
54
00:03:14,870 --> 00:03:17,910
Tonight, I�m not putting the toilet seat down.
55
00:03:17,910 --> 00:03:19,200
Oh, yes you are!
56
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:22,540
I say, we hit an all night diner for corn-dogs and curly fries.
57
00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:25,540
Oh, and then we can go down to the docks and have some clam chowder with the longshoremen.
58
00:03:25,540 --> 00:03:28,050
Soup and guys that smell like fish?
59
00:03:28,050 --> 00:03:29,210
I�m in.
60
00:03:29,210 --> 00:03:29,840
Let�s go.
61
00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:32,260
Morgan?
62
00:03:32,260 --> 00:03:33,140
Oh, no thanks.
63
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I�ve got class in the morning.
64
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Oh no!
65
00:03:41,020 --> 00:03:42,810
This is so much fun.
66
00:03:42,810 --> 00:03:46,020
I can�t believe I waited two hundred years to re-do our floor.
67
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Hey!
68
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:53,610
When you tried to remodel our last house the draw-bridge collapsed and we were castle-bound for weeks.
69
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You and Lancelot weren�t exactly complaining.
70
00:03:56,030 --> 00:03:58,370
Well, I had to do something to occupy my time.
71
00:03:58,370 --> 00:04:01,910
Zellie, rest assured, this time is gonna be different.
72
00:04:01,910 --> 00:04:07,630
First of all, I have a kick-butt power tool and a new fangled invention call electricity.
73
00:04:09,630 --> 00:04:11,420
I don�t have a good feeling about this.
74
00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:11,920
Trust me.
75
00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:12,840
I know what I�m doing.
76
00:04:16,930 --> 00:04:19,140
And I know what I�m doing.
77
00:04:20,890 --> 00:04:22,560
Aunt Zelda, what are you doing here so early?
78
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Early?
79
00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:25,060
It�s four o�clock in the afternoon.
80
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I knew that.
81
00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:27,940
I meant, what are you doing here so early.
82
00:04:27,940 --> 00:04:28,730
in the year?
83
00:04:28,730 --> 00:04:30,480
I mean, it could snow, you could catch a cold.
84
00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:32,490
but I see you brought extra clothes.
85
00:04:32,490 --> 00:04:33,740
Why�d you bring extra clothes?
86
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,240
Hilda broke the house.
87
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Look, I see you�ve been pulling an all nighter.
88
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Oh, I remember those days.
89
00:04:42,250 --> 00:04:43,580
What were you studying?
90
00:04:43,580 --> 00:04:45,580
Goomer and Goober.
91
00:04:45,580 --> 00:04:48,590
I�m not really familiar with the German philosophers.
92
00:04:48,590 --> 00:04:54,260
Anyway, your aunt Hilda, the human wrecking ball, is on a home remodelling binge.
93
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,340
Do you mind if I stay with you?
94
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No, not at all.
95
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For how long?
96
00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:00,390
Oh, just a few days.
97
00:05:00,390 --> 00:05:01,060
A few days.
98
00:05:01,060 --> 00:05:02,220
That�s so much more than.
99
00:05:02,220 --> 00:05:02,930
one day.
100
00:05:02,930 --> 00:05:07,560
Well, I thought it would be fun to spend some time with my favourite niece, that is, if she wants me?
101
00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:08,770
Oh, of course I want you.
102
00:05:08,770 --> 00:05:09,360
You know?
103
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,780
Just, my roommates might feel a little weird about it.
104
00:05:11,780 --> 00:05:13,400
They kinda' like to hang loose.
105
00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:16,570
No problem, I�m the original hang loose gal.
106
00:05:16,570 --> 00:05:19,780
I just love to go with the flow you know?
107
00:05:19,780 --> 00:05:21,370
Kick back, chill out.
108
00:05:21,370 --> 00:05:24,040
Scour and disinfect.
109
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:27,040
It�s a good thing I brought my cleaning supplies.
110
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You travel with cleaning supplies?
111
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Oh, I guess you do.
112
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Just the essentials.
113
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,220
Oh, they're all monogrammed too.
114
00:05:39,260 --> 00:05:41,350
You know, when I went to school we didn�t study like that.
115
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We sat at a table.
116
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Treated our books with care and prayed that the students who had used them before us hadn�t died of the plague.
117
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You know aunt Zelda, things today are a little different.
118
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I know, and I don�t have a problem with that because I�m a.
119
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Hang loose gal.
120
00:05:56,150 --> 00:05:58,280
You really don�t have to keep saying that.
121
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Fine, I�ll just whip up some dinner.
122
00:06:00,530 --> 00:06:02,530
Let�s see what you have.
123
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Diet soda, nail polish and batteries.
124
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That should make quite a casserole.
125
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Hi.
126
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Hi.
127
00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:13,550
Hey, guys.
128
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Listen, um, my aunts gonna stay for a few days if it�s OK with you.
129
00:06:16,090 --> 00:06:19,510
Oh, it�ll be great, you can never have enough adult supervision.
130
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I can say that with a big smile because I have a room of my own on a whole different floor.
131
00:06:24,260 --> 00:06:25,270
See you!
132
00:06:25,270 --> 00:06:32,900
Well, I guess you did have me at your house for Christmas and as my uncle Louis the lip says, �It�s time to pay the piper.
133
00:06:32,900 --> 00:06:37,070
Oh, now don�t worry girls, you wont even know I�m here.
134
00:06:37,070 --> 00:06:40,530
Ten o�clock, everybody ready to turn in?
135
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:42,990
Argh, Green Acres is just about to start.
136
00:06:42,990 --> 00:06:43,830
Oh.
137
00:06:43,830 --> 00:06:45,370
Oh, I love gardening shows.
138
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It�s not a gardening show.
139
00:06:46,830 --> 00:06:51,250
It�s about a ditzy Hungarian socialite who lives on a farm with her husband and a pig named Arnold.
140
00:06:51,250 --> 00:06:56,550
You know, it wouldn�t hurt you girls to try and nourish your minds with something a little more educational.
141
00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:58,550
We�ve been nourishing our minds all day.
142
00:06:58,550 --> 00:06:59,680
We need a funny pig.
143
00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:03,390
There�s a wonderful production of Die Fledermaus on PBS.
144
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:09,140
Ah, that�s what I call a basso profundo.
145
00:07:09,140 --> 00:07:10,600
He�s no Mister Ziffel.
146
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I say we take a vote.
147
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Here�s my vote.
148
00:07:13,190 --> 00:07:17,190
We let my aunt watch her nazi opera here and we go down to the student union and watch the pig on the big screen.
149
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Good idea.
150
00:07:17,860 --> 00:07:18,530
Later.
151
00:07:18,530 --> 00:07:19,240
Bye, aunt Zelda.
152
00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:19,860
Oh, bye.
153
00:07:19,860 --> 00:07:23,660
Well, it looks like it�s just you and me Prince Orlofsky.
154
00:07:29,290 --> 00:07:34,420
I dream this dream a lot but it usually involves baby-doll pyjamas.
155
00:07:34,420 --> 00:07:36,880
but I can�t remember what you were wearing.
156
00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:39,670
Oh hello Miles.
157
00:07:39,670 --> 00:07:42,260
Well, I�m going to be staying here for a few days.
158
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I hope you don�t mind.
159
00:07:43,470 --> 00:07:44,930
Me?
160
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Yeah!
161
00:07:45,470 --> 00:07:46,180
No!
162
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I mean no, no.
163
00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:48,430
Good.
164
00:07:48,430 --> 00:07:51,140
Well, would you like to sit and watch Die Fledermaus with me?
165
00:07:51,140 --> 00:07:53,190
It would be the high point of my existence.
166
00:07:53,190 --> 00:07:55,110
You don�t still have that little crush on me do you?
167
00:07:55,110 --> 00:07:55,610
That?
168
00:07:55,610 --> 00:07:56,110
No.
169
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Way over it.
170
00:07:58,150 --> 00:07:58,730
Gone.
171
00:07:58,730 --> 00:07:59,740
Ancient history.
172
00:08:03,450 --> 00:08:04,570
I think I�ll go to my room.
173
00:08:08,290 --> 00:08:10,700
This is a much bigger job than I thought.
174
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:13,580
Especially after we add on the repair work to the floor.
175
00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:18,670
Or, we leave it like it is and turn the dining room into a cock fighting pit.
176
00:08:18,670 --> 00:08:22,340
I know we can get this job done, it�s just gonna take a little elbow grease.
177
00:08:22,340 --> 00:08:23,430
I�m a cat.
178
00:08:23,430 --> 00:08:24,720
I don�t have elbows.
179
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,220
You, on the other hand, have a magic finger.
180
00:08:27,220 --> 00:08:30,520
Use it and get us out of this home improvement nightmare!
181
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,310
Don�t you want the satisfaction of knowing that we did this ourselves?
182
00:08:33,310 --> 00:08:34,020
No.
183
00:08:34,020 --> 00:08:38,770
I want nothing more than to eat, sleep and dream about Mrs.Michael Douglas.
184
00:08:38,770 --> 00:08:44,030
I don�t care what you and Zelda say, I am gonna' make our house a nicer place to live.
185
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,460
Aunt Zelda, you�re up?
186
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:58,290
I�m ordering a Gonzo knife.
187
00:08:58,290 --> 00:09:02,510
If I act now they�ll throw in a complete set of titanium kebab skewers.
188
00:09:02,510 --> 00:09:05,880
And if I act now I might actually get some sleep.
189
00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:06,470
Bye.
190
00:09:06,470 --> 00:09:07,050
Good night.
191
00:09:07,050 --> 00:09:08,550
Yes.
192
00:09:08,550 --> 00:09:10,970
Oh, what the heck, we only live once.
193
00:09:10,970 --> 00:09:13,270
Throw in the Game Captain Chicken De-boner.
194
00:09:15,020 --> 00:09:16,940
Aunt Zelda, I�m a little confused here.
195
00:09:16,940 --> 00:09:18,360
When I left you were watching the opera.
196
00:09:18,360 --> 00:09:21,320
How did you go from Die Fledermaus to de-boner?
197
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:32,740
Well, after the opera ended I was flipping through the channels and that show came on, the one with the Hungarian and the pig, and before I knew it I was laughing myself silly.
198
00:09:32,740 --> 00:09:36,250
Oh that Gabor gal and the Penwar husking corn.
199
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:38,250
It still tickles me.
200
00:09:38,250 --> 00:09:39,670
That�s my favourite episode.
201
00:09:39,670 --> 00:09:42,000
I can�t believe how much I�ve been missing.
202
00:09:44,210 --> 00:09:46,550
Sabrina, I know why you and Roxie ditched me tonight.
203
00:09:46,550 --> 00:09:50,010
Mmm, because you�re a teeny weenie bit of an uptight control freak?
204
00:09:50,010 --> 00:09:53,350
I was, but that�s about to change.
205
00:09:53,350 --> 00:09:55,980
And you got all this just from watching Green Acres?
206
00:09:55,980 --> 00:09:56,810
Well, and.
207
00:09:56,810 --> 00:09:58,810
and watching the way you kids live.
208
00:09:58,810 --> 00:10:07,610
I mean, when I was in college every time I wanted to cut loose, somebody was there telling me I couldn�t and, usually that somebody was me.
209
00:10:07,610 --> 00:10:11,120
Wow, after all these years you�re finally ready to pop out of your shell.
210
00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:12,990
I�m poised and ready to pop!
211
00:10:12,990 --> 00:10:15,250
You probably don�t want me in the room for this.
212
00:10:15,250 --> 00:10:16,910
I�m gonna go.
213
00:10:16,910 --> 00:10:19,170
Well, that�s great.
214
00:10:19,170 --> 00:10:19,960
You go, girl.
215
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:21,670
I mean, aunt girl.
216
00:10:21,670 --> 00:10:22,790
Wo-who!
217
00:10:22,790 --> 00:10:23,340
Wo-who!
218
00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:27,590
Good morning, aunt Zelda.
219
00:10:27,590 --> 00:10:28,630
So, how did you sleep?
220
00:10:28,630 --> 00:10:30,640
Oh, amazingly well.
221
00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:33,010
I�m starving, what�s for breakfast?
222
00:10:33,010 --> 00:10:36,060
Oh, breakfast, the most important meal of the day.
223
00:10:36,060 --> 00:10:38,640
You can have anything you want.
224
00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,020
Just reach in and grab the first thing that appeals to you
225
00:10:41,020 --> 00:10:42,360
Oh, I couldn�t.
226
00:10:44,020 --> 00:10:45,940
Dare I?
227
00:10:45,940 --> 00:10:46,900
You must.
228
00:10:46,900 --> 00:10:48,990
Unless you want to go back to being your old, uptight self.
229
00:10:48,990 --> 00:10:49,740
Never!
230
00:10:49,740 --> 00:10:50,570
Then watch and learn.
231
00:11:28,990 --> 00:11:29,990
Not bad.
232
00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:32,240
In fact, it�s delicious.
233
00:11:32,240 --> 00:11:33,410
Wow.
234
00:11:33,410 --> 00:11:34,870
I�m very proud of you aunt Zelda.
235
00:11:34,870 --> 00:11:39,290
You know, yesterday you would never have eaten gummy bears with peanut butter and an eight-day-old meatball sandwich.
236
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:40,120
You�re darned right I.
237
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,790
how old was that meat?
238
00:11:41,790 --> 00:11:42,960
Do we care?
239
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:43,460
No.
240
00:11:43,460 --> 00:11:44,080
Are we loose?
241
00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:44,590
Yes.
242
00:11:44,590 --> 00:11:45,380
We�re loose.
243
00:11:45,380 --> 00:11:46,500
Give me an L!
244
00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:47,920
We�re not that loose.
245
00:11:47,920 --> 00:11:51,090
Oh, come on, step it up.
246
00:11:51,090 --> 00:11:52,800
At this rate we�re never gonna' finish.
247
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:54,720
My feet are raw.
248
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:55,640
They�re bleeding!
249
00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:57,180
Oh, you idiot.
250
00:11:57,180 --> 00:11:59,470
You put the sandpaper on upside down.
251
00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:00,520
Get it off me!
252
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:04,310
So, how�s it going up there?
253
00:12:04,310 --> 00:12:07,360
Technically, what�s the difference between braids and knots?
254
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:08,110
Knots?
255
00:12:08,110 --> 00:12:08,610
Oh, dear.
256
00:12:08,610 --> 00:12:09,440
I mean, argh.
257
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:09,990
whatever.
258
00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:11,150
I�m up with that.
259
00:12:11,150 --> 00:12:15,280
The expression is �Down with that�, and you look great.
260
00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:17,410
You guys aren�t going to believe this!
261
00:12:17,410 --> 00:12:19,700
I got us invited to a rave tonight.
262
00:12:19,700 --> 00:12:20,500
What�s a rave?
263
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:23,960
A wild dance party that happens with no advanced warning.
264
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:25,830
Someone gives you a phone number.
265
00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:27,880
You call, then you get another phone number.
266
00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,420
Then, if you sound cool enough they tell you where the party is.
267
00:12:30,420 --> 00:12:32,550
That leaves no time to buy a hostess gift.
268
00:12:32,550 --> 00:12:34,430
Aargh, not a big problem at raves.
269
00:12:34,430 --> 00:12:35,970
I�ve gotta go change.
270
00:12:35,970 --> 00:12:38,760
It could take me hours to find something that says �I just threw this on.
271
00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:40,390
Oh, I�d say you�re there.
272
00:12:40,390 --> 00:12:43,100
Oh, I have to tell Josh where to meet us.
273
00:12:43,100 --> 00:12:44,690
Are you coming with us aunt Zelda?
274
00:12:44,690 --> 00:12:45,520
Oh, no.
275
00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:49,070
How could you just go to a party on the spur of the moment?
276
00:12:49,070 --> 00:12:51,570
Well the spur is the best part of the moment.
277
00:12:51,570 --> 00:12:54,030
Sorry, I have to teach class in the morning.
278
00:12:54,030 --> 00:12:58,580
And besides, I look like an albino Whoopie Goldberg.
279
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:09,920
This party is so awesome!
280
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:13,260
Who would have thought you could have gotten me invited to such a cool party.
281
00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:15,340
Oh, don�t worry, it won�t happen again.
282
00:13:15,340 --> 00:13:19,100
Sabrina, I think I saw your aunt over there.
283
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:20,180
Really?
284
00:13:20,180 --> 00:13:21,390
So she showed up.
285
00:13:21,390 --> 00:13:22,060
Wow.
286
00:13:22,060 --> 00:13:22,930
What�s she doing?
287
00:13:22,930 --> 00:13:24,940
Hiding in the corner clutching her hostess gift?
288
00:13:24,940 --> 00:13:26,690
I think she is the hostess gift.
289
00:13:26,690 --> 00:13:34,400
Oh, hi Sabrina, this rave is fabulous.
290
00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:37,780
Boys, would you mind passing me towards the ladies room?
291
00:13:37,780 --> 00:13:38,780
I need to freshen up a bit.
292
00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:51,880
Am I hallucinating or did one of my primary care units get passed over our heads like a sack of potatoes?
293
00:13:55,380 --> 00:13:59,760
Wow, if I had an aunt who partied that hardy I might go home for Thanksgiving once in a while.
294
00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:01,970
Hello, remember me?
295
00:14:01,970 --> 00:14:03,310
Your girlfriend?
296
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:06,770
Don�t worry, we�ll toss you around as soon as we�re done with her.
297
00:14:06,770 --> 00:14:09,560
OK, I�ve gotta put a stop to this.
298
00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:10,230
Aunt Zelda!
299
00:14:10,230 --> 00:14:11,110
Can I talk to you for a second?
300
00:14:11,110 --> 00:14:12,020
Sure, honey.
301
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:15,320
OK fellas, time to touch terra firma.
302
00:14:17,530 --> 00:14:20,570
Very smooth landing.
303
00:14:20,570 --> 00:14:21,780
Thank you.
304
00:14:21,780 --> 00:14:22,490
Vic.
305
00:14:22,490 --> 00:14:27,790
You�re not a Vic, you�re a Victor, a conqueror.
306
00:14:27,790 --> 00:14:31,880
Actually I�m a Blowski, Vic Blowski.
307
00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:35,260
Ah yes, so it says on your tattoo.
308
00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,050
What are you doing?
309
00:14:38,050 --> 00:14:40,800
Having the time of my life.
310
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:43,810
Thanks to you I feel like a young lass of two hundred again.
311
00:14:43,810 --> 00:14:47,480
Aunt Zelda, I told you to loosen up a little bit, not become completely unravelled.
312
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,520
I am not unravelling.
313
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:51,020
But I�m on my way.
314
00:14:51,020 --> 00:14:52,480
Boys!
315
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:53,570
Set me up again!
316
00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:04,530
Where have you been?
317
00:15:04,530 --> 00:15:06,080
It�s five-thirty in the morning!
318
00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:07,290
You could have picked up a phone and called!
319
00:15:07,290 --> 00:15:10,870
Well, I was with my friends and we weren�t near a phone.
320
00:15:10,870 --> 00:15:12,080
That�s no excuse.
321
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:13,840
I have been up all night worried sick about you.
322
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:15,250
I�m sorry.
323
00:15:15,250 --> 00:15:17,300
I promise, next time I�ll be home before.
324
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:19,840
wait a minute, you�re not my mother.
325
00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:22,970
Aunt Zelda, do you realize you have a class to teach in two hours?
326
00:15:22,970 --> 00:15:24,180
Yes, I do.
327
00:15:24,180 --> 00:15:31,730
Sabrina, I have been where I am supposed to be every day for the last six hundred years, tonight I�m doing something for me.
328
00:15:31,730 --> 00:15:36,360
Now if you�ll excuse me, Vic is waiting for me out in the van.
329
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,700
You are going out with a guy named Vic who drives a van?
330
00:15:39,700 --> 00:15:41,700
He doesn�t just drive a van.
331
00:15:41,700 --> 00:15:43,530
he sells steaks out of the back.
332
00:15:46,490 --> 00:15:46,870
Done!
333
00:15:46,870 --> 00:15:49,790
And I must say Martha Stewart is an amateur compared to me.
334
00:15:49,790 --> 00:15:52,920
Except she probably never varnished herself into a corner.
335
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,670
First of all, I am not in a corner.
336
00:15:56,670 --> 00:16:00,010
Secondly, how long do you think it takes for varnish to dry?
337
00:16:00,010 --> 00:16:02,840
Hilda, if there was ever a time to use your magic it�s now!
338
00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:04,010
All right!
339
00:16:04,010 --> 00:16:05,850
But I did all the tough part myself.
340
00:16:05,850 --> 00:16:09,730
Well, that solves that problem.
341
00:16:09,730 --> 00:16:14,770
Aunt Hilda, why are my feet sticking to the floor?
342
00:16:14,770 --> 00:16:18,980
Because you�ve just ruined nine hours of varnishing!
343
00:16:18,980 --> 00:16:21,240
Well, we�ve got bigger problems.
344
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:24,160
Aunt Zelda stayed up all night last night dancing at a rave.
345
00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:25,160
A rave?
346
00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:29,410
One of those wild, out of control parties that usually end up being shut down by the police?
347
00:16:29,410 --> 00:16:30,870
How come you didn�t invite me?
348
00:16:30,870 --> 00:16:32,500
Aunt Hilda, I�m really worried.
349
00:16:32,500 --> 00:16:34,080
I mean she�s gone completely off the deep end.
350
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:37,250
Don�t worry Sabrina, it�s good for Zelda to loosen up a little bit.
351
00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:37,840
Well.
352
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:44,260
Zelda Spellman, professor of quantum physics, is now cruising around town in a van with a twenty-two year old meat salesman named Vic.
353
00:16:44,260 --> 00:16:46,680
We�ve gotta' find Zelda and talk some sense into her.
354
00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:48,310
We�re also low on flank steak.
355
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:51,270
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
356
00:16:51,270 --> 00:16:52,270
Hold your horses.
357
00:16:52,270 --> 00:16:52,980
Hold your horses.
358
00:16:52,980 --> 00:16:55,060
Hey Vic, do you know what time it is?
359
00:16:55,060 --> 00:16:58,400
I�m sorry, man, but my new lady, Zelda, she wants a tattoo.
360
00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:02,150
Zelda, meet Michelangelo, the best tattoo artist in this city.
361
00:17:02,150 --> 00:17:03,700
And it�s a pleasure to meet you.
362
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:06,950
You are named after one of my very favourite artists.
363
00:17:06,950 --> 00:17:09,790
Oh, you�ve been over to my uncle Michelangelo�s parlour in Jersey huh?
364
00:17:09,790 --> 00:17:15,170
No, I was talking about the Michelangelo who painted the Sistine Chapel.
365
00:17:15,170 --> 00:17:17,080
Oh, great, more competition.
366
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:18,750
This is Zelda�s first tattoo.
367
00:17:18,750 --> 00:17:20,460
Well, better late than never.
368
00:17:20,460 --> 00:17:21,630
So, what do you have in mind?
369
00:17:21,630 --> 00:17:26,840
Can you give me a rendering of Lucas Crannock�s �The elders judgement of Paris�?
370
00:17:26,840 --> 00:17:29,720
No, but I can give you a rat that says keep on trucking.
371
00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:31,310
Go ahead.
372
00:17:31,310 --> 00:17:32,350
Look round, see what you like, babe.
373
00:17:32,350 --> 00:17:33,390
OK.
374
00:17:33,390 --> 00:17:34,270
babe.
375
00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:41,360
Zelda!
376
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:42,480
What are you doing?
377
00:17:42,480 --> 00:17:45,990
Choosing a tattoo, and I can assure you it won't be of you.
378
00:17:45,990 --> 00:17:47,950
You can�t get a tattoo, it�s not your style.
379
00:17:47,950 --> 00:17:49,990
Well, maybe it wasn�t before, but it is now.
380
00:17:49,990 --> 00:17:53,950
Oh yeah, your biceps are just crying out for �So many chicks; So little time.
381
00:17:53,950 --> 00:17:57,830
I really don�t appreciate the two of you interfering in my affairs.
382
00:17:57,830 --> 00:17:58,830
Welcome to my world.
383
00:17:58,830 --> 00:17:59,750
Yo, babe!
384
00:17:59,750 --> 00:18:00,590
You pick one out yet?
385
00:18:00,590 --> 00:18:01,210
Not yet.
386
00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:01,880
babe!
387
00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,760
I would like the both of you to leave.
388
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:05,220
now.
389
00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:06,880
We can�t just leave you here to ruin your life.
390
00:18:06,880 --> 00:18:13,060
I�m not ruining it, I�m changing it and I refuse to discus this any further with a couple of busy-body tattoos!
391
00:18:13,060 --> 00:18:16,140
So, what�s it gonna be, babe?
392
00:18:16,140 --> 00:18:18,520
I�ve made up my mind.
393
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,860
I want that rose right over there.
394
00:18:20,860 --> 00:18:23,230
Spooky!
395
00:18:23,230 --> 00:18:25,240
That�s the one mom picked.
396
00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:29,870
Get ready, babe, 'cause this is gonna hurt like hell.
397
00:18:29,870 --> 00:18:34,790
Yeah, most chicks say it�s not as bad as child birth.
398
00:18:34,790 --> 00:18:39,290
Well now that I�m completely at ease, ink me babe.
399
00:18:39,290 --> 00:18:43,630
Something wrong, it�s not working.
400
00:18:43,630 --> 00:18:46,590
I�ve never seen anything like this, your skin won't absorb the ink.
401
00:18:46,590 --> 00:18:47,840
That�s odd.
402
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:50,050
That was a brand new needle.
403
00:18:50,050 --> 00:18:52,470
Hey lady, you�ve got some very weird flesh.
404
00:18:52,470 --> 00:18:54,390
Hey, don�t diss my girls flesh!
405
00:18:54,390 --> 00:18:56,270
Come on babe, we�ll try another place.
406
00:18:56,270 --> 00:19:00,190
No, I should have realized I couldn�t get a tattoo.
407
00:19:00,190 --> 00:19:02,560
Well do you wanna' get something pieced instead?
408
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:06,400
I�m sorry Vic, this just isn�t gonna work out.
409
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:07,690
Why not?
410
00:19:07,690 --> 00:19:10,570
Cause I�m trying to be something I�m not.
411
00:19:10,570 --> 00:19:12,620
It�s not you, it�s me.
412
00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:14,200
Goodbye.
413
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:15,450
babe.
414
00:19:15,450 --> 00:19:18,160
Good bye, babe.
415
00:19:20,120 --> 00:19:22,460
Hey, I�m sorry man.
416
00:19:22,460 --> 00:19:24,920
So how�s the rib buy this week?
417
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:26,130
I�d go with the Porterhouse.
418
00:19:26,130 --> 00:19:28,670
That was a big waste of time.
419
00:19:28,670 --> 00:19:32,050
It�s all my fault, I only meant to loosen aunt Zelda up a little bit.
420
00:19:32,050 --> 00:19:33,550
Instead I turned her into trailer trash.
421
00:19:33,550 --> 00:19:35,010
Maybe it�s not such a bad thing.
422
00:19:35,010 --> 00:19:36,930
Now I�m the classy one in the house.
423
00:19:36,930 --> 00:19:38,730
Drat!
424
00:19:38,730 --> 00:19:40,770
We�re out of pork rinds and Ding Dongs!
425
00:19:40,770 --> 00:19:42,900
Aunt Zelda, you�re back.
426
00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:44,570
With no visible tattoo.
427
00:19:44,570 --> 00:19:46,110
I didn�t get a tattoo.
428
00:19:46,110 --> 00:19:47,820
Oh, so we did get through to you.
429
00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:49,070
I�m so glad!
430
00:19:49,070 --> 00:19:51,860
So nice to know that I helped my sister in her time of need.
431
00:19:51,860 --> 00:19:54,120
The needle wouldn�t penetrate my skin.
432
00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:59,000
My witch subconscious wouldn�t allow me to do something so untrue to myself.
433
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,460
Same thing happened to me when I tried to become a nutritionist.
434
00:20:01,460 --> 00:20:06,880
I guess I�m just condemned for all eternity to be a beautiful, uptight genius.
435
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:08,630
Give yourself a hundred years.
436
00:20:08,630 --> 00:20:09,800
you won't be so beautiful.
437
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,340
Thank you so very much.
438
00:20:12,340 --> 00:20:15,140
Aunt Zelda, you�re not condemned to be uptight.
439
00:20:15,140 --> 00:20:18,930
Your subconscious didn�t stop you from eating Gummy Bears and an eight-day-old meatball?
440
00:20:18,930 --> 00:20:20,680
Well no, I guess it didn�t.
441
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,190
See, you can loosen up.
442
00:20:22,190 --> 00:20:23,850
You just have to stay true to who you are.
443
00:20:23,850 --> 00:20:25,110
You're right, Sabrina.
444
00:20:25,110 --> 00:20:28,110
Thanks to you I can still be a hang loose gal.
445
00:20:28,110 --> 00:20:29,070
Aw!
446
00:20:29,070 --> 00:20:30,860
Of course you can.
447
00:20:30,860 --> 00:20:32,820
Now, wanna go out and get some breakfast?
448
00:20:32,820 --> 00:20:33,780
Now?
449
00:20:33,780 --> 00:20:35,990
Shouldn�t you be getting ready for class?
450
00:20:35,990 --> 00:20:40,540
And by the way Sabrina, if you keep up that partying all night, you are gonna flunk out of college.
451
00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:42,330
So much for hanging loose.
452
00:20:42,330 --> 00:20:43,920
Welcome back, Aunt Zelda.
453
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:44,580
Help!
454
00:20:44,580 --> 00:20:46,130
Cat stuck in varnish.
455
00:20:46,130 --> 00:20:48,210
On second thought, breakfast sounds good.
456
00:20:58,810 --> 00:21:00,060
One of us should really get that.
457
00:21:00,060 --> 00:21:01,520
Yeah, one of us should.
458
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:03,560
The youngest or the closest?
459
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:08,020
I can�t make such a big decision right now, let�s wait until the next commercial.
460
00:21:08,020 --> 00:21:09,780
Oh, I'll get it.
461
00:21:09,780 --> 00:21:11,070
Come in!
462
00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:12,570
Hi!
463
00:21:12,570 --> 00:21:14,200
Oh, no, not again.
464
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,410
Oh, relax, I'm not moving in.
465
00:21:16,410 --> 00:21:20,370
I just came by to drop off a little thank you gift from Zelda.
466
00:21:20,370 --> 00:21:23,410
Wow, a suitcase full of raw meat.
467
00:21:23,410 --> 00:21:24,500
That' so thoughtful.
468
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,830
And so marbled.
469
00:21:25,830 --> 00:21:26,880
I�m keeping the T-bone.
470
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:27,540
Bye.
471
00:21:27,590 --> 00:21:32,140
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