All language subtitles for High Maintenance s02e02xdx

_
[man speaking French]

_
[man speaking French]

_
[man speaking French]

_
[camera phone clicks]

- Pardon moi.
- No problem.

[continues speaking French]

Okay. Hey, hey, we should
take Claire on that tour.

She's probably already gone.
She lives in the neighborhood.

I might want to go, Ron.

You're a grown-ass woman.
You do what you want.

Come on. Let's find this damn place.
Thank you so much.

If we had parked closer...

Wait. This left
or that left?

- Let's go this way.
- Okay. All right.

You've got to be kidding me. Which
one is the... Here, let me see.

Oh, this is... So it's the red
tape on the back of the...

Aha.

Hey. Do you think that we
should get Claire some mace?

Yeah, maybe. I don't like that
there's bars on the windows.

Do you know what doesn't
have bars on the windows?

- A hotel.
- All right. That'll be enough of that.

[laughs]
Oh. Hello.

Hey. Afternoon.

- Hello.
- Cute kitty.

A cat on a leash?
That's freaky, right?

- All right, there we go.
- Oh good.

The whole building, 850K and upward.

It's crazy.

Oh God. What a dump.

Well, high ceilings, plenty of light.

[door thuds] Okay, that's insane.

The bathroom door doesn't
even open all the way.

Yeah, well, you know,
it adds character.

Eww. Eww. Oh! Ron!

The gentlemen left me
some dishes in the sink.

It's just like home!

Man, I got to get these
compression socks off.

Honey, no! You don't know
who has sat on that thing.

And don't put your bare feet on
that filthy carpet. [Ron groans]

[sighs]

[grunts] Wait.

[sighs] Where's the bedroom?

I think it's up there.

Up this ladder?

- Uh-huh.
- No, no. No. No.

There is never a Sleep Number
at the top of a ladder.

It'd be like sleeping in a tree house.

Oh, please, Aunt Sue. Let's see
how whimsical you're feeling

the fourth time
you get up to pee tonight.

Hey, settle down.

Claire thinks she's
doing us a good thing.

It's cheaper than a hotel,
and besides, we...

- Oh, oh, hell no.
- What?

- Hell no!
- What is it?

There's a fucking snake over there!

Oh my...
[laughing]

Yes, Ron. It's just like a tree house,

with a snake and everything.

It's like The Jungle Book.

Is it in the ad?
Did they have it in the ad?

I don't know.
I never saw the ad.

You are the one, Ron, who was okay
with Claire picking us a place.

- A fucking snake in a box.
- Hey.

Do you know where there are no snakes?

Shut up!
[laughs]

Yup, we got in okay.

Found parking a few blocks away.
It was a little bit of a walk.

Oh, honey, is this
neighborhood safe for the car?

Well, I know, but you never know.

No. Yes. The place...

[whispers] No. That hotel
is too expensive. It is.

No, honey, the place is fine.

Thank you so much for setting it up.

Yup. Oh no, we are in a loft.

There's a snake.
It is all happening.

Wait. What? Oh. Umm...
[clears throat]

- Claire didn't know there was a snake.
- Oh, it's in the ad.

The snake's name is Fagin.

- She didn't even read it.
- Fagin?

Okay, honey, your dad is
freaked out, needless to say.

I am so glad you like it.
I was so stressing out about it.

Oh, honey, it's wonderful.

Daddy and I are going to be very hip,

staying here this weekend.
[laughs] [grumbles]

Oh, if anyone in the building asks...

- Yeah?
- Don't say you're doing Airbnb.

- How come?
- Well, it's illegal, but not illegal,

but really is illegal. You know what?
Don't even... Don't even bother.

Okay. Did you hear that, Ron?
We're outlaws.

- Hey.
- Hey, Claire.

Oh my gosh! Hi!

Oh, hi. Mwah.
Hey. Mwah.

These are my friends. Bea,
Jovon, these are my parents.

Hey, hey.
Hi. I'm Sharon.

Get so caught up.
I'm so excited.

Oh. Yeah. Uh-huh.
So nice to meet you.

Hey, Ron.
How you doing?

Oh. Hi, Bea.

Bea's my new roommate.

- Oh.
- Yeah, yeah.

Are you guys eating here?

Well, if we can get a table. [Chuckles]

You know what? Let me see if...
what the girl has to say.

So, what are you up to?
[whispers] We're stoned A.F.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Ooh.

You don't have to whisper.

Did you bring enough for everybody?
[laughs]

No, but I guess I could call
our guy if you want.

Oh my God, yes!

? ?

- Can we take a photo?
- Sure.

$400 for dinner?
[phone camera clicks]

I did not come here to buy tiny
Bea three fucking martinis.

- Mmm. You know.
- Mom! Come on! [phone camera clicks]

Okay! We're taking a picture.
Just a second.

Ronnie, go in there.

- Oh. Oh.
- Go. Yes, big boy.

[laughs]
Yay!

- Yay!
- Fabulous.

It's hard not to look around and just...

I feel like this place is empty.

She took everything.

My tchotchkes, my plants.

She took everything that
made this place like a home.

Now it's all fucking empty.
I don't know, man.

I wouldn't really characterize
this place as, uh... empty.

Oh? I really let her
take everything.

You know, I was trying
to be the nice guy.

I got a list of new things
I need to buy now.

Well, now you got some new pot,

so you can cross that off the list.

[both laugh] That I do.
Yeah. Here you go.

- Little extra for you.
- Oh, thank you.

- Wanna smoke?
- No, I can't right now.

Thanks, though, man.

Okay. Okay.

Have you seen Arielle lately?

I thought we talked about this, man.

Please, I just...
I just need to know.

She didn't ask about you,
if that's what you wanna know.

Sorry, man.

Okay. Wait, wait.

Jared.

Was he there?

[phone chimes, buzzes] Listen, dude,

I really can't come here if you're gonna

keep making me talk
to you about your ex.

It feels really weird.

I got it, I got it.
I hear you loud and clear.

_

No, you don't hear me, man.
I don't want money, okay?

You-gotta-move-on.org, okay?

He dyed his hair
the same color as her.

Okay, dude.

I'm gonna give you a hug...

and then I'm gonna leave. Okay?

Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then we're not gonna
talk about your ex anymore.

Okay? All right.
All right.

Hey, chin up. You've got a lot
of stuff going on for you.

You have a clearly defined style,

you're a great artist,
you got two ram skulls.

She took the third one.

Don't get greedy.

? ?

Yeah, those joints are 15 each.

Oh my. Thank you.

Thank you.
Great to see you, babe.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
[air-kisses]

All right, what about CBD?

'Cause all my friends
in the "legal" states

can't stop flapping
their gums about CBD.

Yeah. No, I used to carry it, but
people weren't buying it, so.

Okay, well, what...
what about Thai stick?

Thai stick?
Mmhmm.

Thai sticks aren't a thing, Dad.

Yeah, what's a Thai stick?
You... "What's a Thai stick?"

I've never heard of that.
Man, you are a fine purveyor

of fine cannabis. You ain't
never heard of Thai stick?

I didn't say I was
a fine purveyor of cannabis.

[both laugh]

Don't tell him that that Thai
stick is not a thing, okay?

- It is totally a thing.
- Yeah.

We were smoking Thai stick before you
were a twinkle in your dad's eye.

Yeah. I want a photo
of me with that snake.

- No, no, no, please don't. No. Seriously.
- Yes, yes, please do.

Ron will literally crap
in his pants. Okay.

And you know this whole building's
million-dollar apartments.

Oh yeah, I know. I have, um, another
client who lives in the building.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Oh wow. Is his apartment
nicer than this one?

Uh, they have nicer furniture.

Yeah, but I gotta share the same room

with a fucking six-foot
boa constrictor named Fagin.

- What?
- [laughs] Yeah.

- Six-foot boa const...
- Right over there.

[laughter]
Yes!

I don't get too close.

Wow.
[Jovon laughs]

All right, man.
Good luck.

Oh. [Chuckles]
Thank you.

[door opens, closes]
[laughter continues]

Thank you so much... Oh yeah,
you're wonderful. Good night.

For coming and helping us.
You're beautiful

and capable, and you're so smart.

Okay, guys. All right.
And you're beautiful.

I think you had
a little too much. Okay.

- I'll see you tomorrow. All right.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right.

I love you.
No more. No more.

Text us when you get home.
All right. Okay.

Love you. Oh, I need some ice cream.

I gotta clean up this place.

[both laugh]
What? What?

You keep saying "bodega."
I do?

- You said it, like, 30 times.
- No, not 30 times.

"Bodega. Bodega."

[both laugh] Girl!

- You are so high.
- Yes, I am. Okay.

I have to be, in order to deal with
that fucking dump that we're in.

You're Airbnb, aren't you?

How much is he charging you?

What? 'Cause that's not
allowed in this building.

What are your names?

I don't know who you think
you're talking to like that,

but we are friends with Derek.

I doubt that.
You're twice his age.

And you are small-minded.

We love Derek, okay?

Our snakes...
are friends.

[both laugh]

Your what are what?

Snake club, bi-atch!

[both laugh]

Get in, get in.
Lock the door!

No wonder that cat is trying
to get away from her.

She's a fucking crazy freak.

"Snake club, bitch!"
"Snake club, bitch!"

[both laugh] Careful there.

[coughs]

Do we have any more?
Do we have the second joint?

- Come on!
- Hold up.

- Double up.
- Get out! You're a cheater.

Okay.

[laughs] Ho, ho! She
scores right off the bat.

I almost scored my own goal.

Let's say you get points
if you score your own goal.

Then you would lose.
I'll lose.

This is fun.

Ah! I scored!
Boo! Boo!

Ah...
Boo!

[exhales] [inhales]

[coughing] [both laughing]

God. God.
I feel better already.

- I didn't like those girls.
- Which girls?

You know, Claire's friends,
Bea and Jovon.

No. [Laughs]
Honey, Jov... [snorts]

Jovon is a young man.

Oh. Messed that up.

But Claire says that there's
no such thing as gender,

so what the hell do I know?

Hey, Shar.

Yeah?

[laughs]

[both moaning] [bedsprings squeaking]

[both shout]

[both laugh]

[Ronald grunts]

Oh! Ow!
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Oh. What are you doing? I'm sorry.
I gotta go to the bathroom.

- Oh fuck. Fuck.
- What?

Honey, what?
Did you hurt yourself?

We gotta go, Sharon.
What?

We gotta go, Sharon.
Oh fuck.

Give me my shoes.
Okay, okay.

Bring me my shoes!
Okay, I'll get 'em.

Here. Here, here, here.
Here, here.

Okay. Oh my God.

Two doubles are fine.
We'll take whatever you got.

[gasps] Jesus.
Yup. Mm-hmm.

Sorry. Damn.
[laughs] Sorry.

[elevator dings]

- You startled me.
- Yeah, I'm sorry.

? ?

[intercom beeps] Hello.

[laughs] Good morning, baby. Morning.

- How'd you sleep?
- Fine.

Why were you waiting in the vestibule?

Oh, 'cause we took a Zillow walk,

and then it was cold, so we
went inside to wait for you.

Here you are. We got coffee at that
neat little bodega down there.

Oh, there's much better places
on Troutman.

Hey, what say we head into
the city, get some brunch?

That's right.
I want to hear

what that Magnolia Bakery
place is all about.

Yeah, but I have to pee.
Can I go inside?

No, we've got to move the car.

Ah yeah, I gotta do that.
But I really have to pee.

That's okay.
Some other place.

We enjoyed meeting your
friends last night.

So nice. I was so happy...

? Love never came easily to me ?

I usually use more slang.

Like what? What's your favorite one?

I mean, I know it's kind of layman,

but I like "pussy."

Oh, we know that.

[group laughs] Here we are.

- Yeah.
- Guys. Okay, but just...

we're always, talking, talking.
I thought last week,

we decided that this week

we were gonna set some
actual action goals...

That's what we're doing.

And that next week we'd circle back.

[singsongy] Change of plans!

Oh. What is this? You're
so excited about this.

I know. Okay. Go.

We actually have a guest
moderator for next week.

She's a friend of a friend.
Her name is Amira. Oh. Yes.

Okay. She's a Pakistani
Muslim feminist.

She's gonna lead a discussion
on intersectionality.

Here? Where? Yeah, so not the white
woman leading the conversation.

Probably for the best.

All this stuff has been
happening while I've been gone?

We've been having a lot of fun,
but we've missed you so much.

Every week we talk a lot.
People are energized.

But you know what?
The first march was, "Ah!"

I mean, I stayed... Actually, the
first march was super safe.

- It wasn't that crazy.
- It was a lot of anger...

It actually wasn't very violent,
which is not a positive thing.

What are you talking about?
That's a great thing.

Everyone was like,

"Oh, it was so peaceful.
Good job, protesters."

The police decide whether they
escalate something or not,

so I'm not interested
in praising the police

for not beating
the hell out of people.

In Ferguson, the police react very
differently to the protesters,

and that's because of racism.

And the fact is that we should
not be praising the police

for showing restraint
against white people.

I'm saying that
you can have a good time

and you can protest at the same time.

They wouldn't move.
They wouldn't act.

Beating the hell out
of a peaceful protester...

I've got a gun.

- What?
- I know.

I got a gun. I got a gun! I got a gun.

That's awesome. See... No, no, no.
Wait. I have a feeling... Okay.

Here's my thought. Here's my thought.
Come on.

Shit is going down, ladies,

and if I'm going to the gun fight,

I don't wanna show up armed
with my amazing ideals.

I wanna show up with an actual gun.

What... No. What do you think is going
to happen when you come with a gun?

People use guns. No, no, I
knew you wouldn't like it,

but the point is, things are changing.

We didn't think this stuff
was going to happen,

and it happened.
The rules have changed.

You're gonna shoot yourself in
the leg is what's gonna happen.

I'm not gonna shoot myself.
Or someone else.

Once you bring a gun
out, more guns come out.

- Yes, exactly.
- That's correct.

Do you know how to use it?

I don't... I mean,
how hard could it be?

I have a master's. I'm sure
I can figure out how to...

- In literature though, right?
- Yeah.

Are you kidding?
That's great.

You think you can
show up to a "gun fight"?

What do you mean? Against the police?
Against who?

Listen, it's a new paradigm.

[doorbell chimes] I am
responsible for my own...

Okay, I'm sensing a lot
of negativity from you.

I think you're a badass,

- and I think that you can take it.
- Thank you.

- Hi, Cecily. Hi!
- Oh my God, you have the glow

of revolution on your skin. [Laughs]

- Come on in.
- Here, take this.

You brought so much stuff. I know.

I brought like 52 shades of magenta.

Where's your friend, Nayima?
Oh, she couldn't make it.

She had a really bad ayahuasca trip.

Okay. Here, will you bring
these into the other room?

[knocks] Hey. They're all waiting.
Oh, Camille. Hi.

How are you, lady? Good.
How are you doing?

I'm good.
It's good to see you.

You too. Where's my little minimuffin?

Oh, she's upstairs with the neighbor.

Oh, what?
Play date.

Aw. I'm a better play date.

Oh.
Will she be back later?

- Yes, don't worry.
- I brought food.

Great. And I got Malia a
little gift for being her.

- You're too sweet.
- Thank you.

Well, I was hoping
to give it to her myself.

- Okay. I'm sure that can happen.
- Maybe later.

I'm gonna go join the party. Sure.

- Molly, Molly, Molly.
- Hi, Camille.

How are you?

Camille got Malia a black doll.

Is that weird?
I mean, Malia is half black,

and she should have
an abundance of black dolls

of all different types, which she does.
Yeah, but do you think

she's trying to tell us something?

Like when she babysat,
did she take count

of how many black dolls and how many
white dolls she had or something?

I put together this little number.

- Ahh!
- Vulva!

- It's plush. Whoa!
- It's so detailed.

It has multiple... vulvas.
Oh my God. Wow.

- Where's the vagina?
- This is vulva.

You got...
You're all vulva right now.

There is artistic license.
I imagined

your vagina, Rachel,
when I made it. Yeah.

Because, obviously,
look at the coloring.

You know what it is?
It's tighter that I would think.

Cecily's the only woman of color here.

Do you think she feels okay with that?

Well, I know
that we strive towards inclusion

and representation always,
but it's okay.

I'm trying to build a safe space,

and I was actually
really excited for Malia,

to spend some time
with some women of color.

Of course. Of course. And we can
make sure that that happens.

If it doesn't happen today,
that's only one time.

Who are you texting?

I'm just inviting a few more people
since we had some cancellations.

Don't be weird.
I am not being weird.

Your coat drive
went really well, though.

Thank you. It was a huge success.
That was great.

Ooh, I should've given you some coats.

Yeah, you should've.
Sorry.

It's okay. We did really,
really well. Yeah.

[whispers] I kept one coat.
No, you didn't.

Where that weed at, girl?
I know. Actually, we're out,

but I was gonna order in.
You want? Yes, I want.

Let's do it.
Of course I want.

You know what?
A hot glue gun.

Yes.
Okay, well, plug it in.

Katy Perry is
actually Jon Benet Ramsey.

No. I saw... yes.
Have you read that?

And I did see this.
Why are you so...

Why do you immediately negate me?

I know, but I just feel like...

[knock on door]
Has anybody even looked

at the years they were born?
It's the eyes.

Hi!
Dawnesha!

Hi. It is so good
to see you.

Her parents sacrificed
her for Katy Perry's success.

- Hey, everyone.
- I'm telling you.

This is Dawnesha.

Hi. Oh, Hi.
This is my wife, Molly.

Hi. Oh wait, you guys have met.

You came to her amazing
restorative yoga class at Kula.

That's right. Yes. Well, I haven't seen
this one in my amazing class in a while.

Listen, I've been busy organizing these
meet-ups, and I'm glad you could come.

Make a sign. You want a red wine?
Yes, please.

[intercom rings]

This is, like, beautiful.
Just do this.

Dude, your weed guy's so fast.

He hasn't even texted me back yet.

Brenna, who's here?
Who did you invite?

I just invited a few more people.
Don't worry about it.

We've got room.
[women chattering]

- How do you know Brenna?
- Oh, I actually don't. We've never met.

We just follow each other
on Instagram.

She sent me a message.
She told me to come over.

It was a mild winter. I know.
Remember that day, 70 in February?

70 degrees in February.

You know, there are some good
things about global warming.

It was really nice. I mean, it's scary.
Just saying, you know?

Hey, you doing all right? You got wine?
Hey, girl. Yeah.

Okay, so this isn't a deck
that I've ever really used.

Ooh, whatever.
Tarot's tarot, no?

In terms of delineation of tasks,

it is like a "Pump Up
the Jams" playlist.

Of course, yeah. I already started it.
Oh. Okay, great.

[intercom rings]
Molly, I think Cary's early!

Oh, it's the weed guy.
Wait. Weed guy?

I thought we had a policy.

I'm not okay with this.

It's not like he's coming in
to hang out with us.

Well, do you think he'll mind
if you buy weed in the hall?

Just for today? The hallway? I'm
not buying weed in the hallway.

What if somebody walks by?
[scoffs] I don't know!

Molly, he just has
a really intense male look.

He might trigger someone.

I always use a service
that's all women.

Really? It's female
owned, female operated.

- Amazing.
- It's called CannaBitches.

CannaBitches? That's wonderful.

[knocks on door] It's gonna be fine.

Hey, hey. What's up? Hey.

Nice to see you. Hey, Brenna.
Nice to see you too.

Hi. How are ya? Oh, a party.
Can I take these off?

Yes, thank you very much. Sure.

Someone lost their cat.
Nice to see you.

Nice to see you too. [Whispers]
All right, so listen.

I want to let you know that there's
a palpable feminine moon energy

surging through the space
right now... Okay.

And just you even being
a man could disrupt it,

so just try to be neutral, okay?

Oh man. Should I go? No, no, no, no, no.
Come on in.

But just...
[exhales slowly]

Okay.

[whispers] It's fine. Are you sure?

Yeah.
Okay.

Hey, you wanna set up over here?
Uh, sure.

Sure. Yeah. Sorry.

Don't mean to take up too much space.

Totally fine. We got room. Oh yeah.

Hold on a second.
This idea of male allies

just reinforces that we need
their voice to speak for us,

that they validate our existence
and what we want.

- And, uh...
- Well, how's the Amnesia Haze?

Uh, you know, it's good, man...
ma'am. It's good.

It's really good. Uh...

It's perpetuating the idea
that we need them

to help us to fix... Right, right,
and if they wanna help us,

they have to stop treating
us like we're helpers.

Well, I guess we'll
take Amnesia Haze. Thanks.

I don't have any money.
Brenna, you got cash?

- Create machines to jack 'em off.
- There is more

- than our lives to procreating.
- Okay.

But not... we don't all
have to procreate.

- No, we don't.
- But some of us do.

Some want to.
Yeah.

You sure you don't want any more?

I think we're all right. All right.

Oh, hey, will you take
a picture of us before you go?

White people and black
people had to come together

for us to end slavery and Jim Crow.

I don't know why I'm gesticulating
towards... End Jim Crow?

Cool.

Guys! Picture, picture, picture!

- Quick, quick, quick!
- All right.

All right.
You got this.

I want the pussy-teeth sign.

[lively chattering]

Oh good, get that in the shot.
We got it. We got it.

We ready?
Okay.

- Horizontal?
- Yeah, horizontal.

Horizontal?
Yeah.

All right.
Okay, here we go.

And... hey,
there's something...

What?
[screaming, shouting]

Oh shit! Oh!

Shut up! Everybody calm down!

Calm down! Calm down.

Calm down! You gotta get
under it like a pizza.

You gotta get under it like a pizza.

Yes.
Don't hurt it.

No, you gotta sandwich it. I
am giving him a platform.

We all deserve a platform. Be careful.

We all deserve this.
Holy shit.

- Don't hurt it.
- I'm not hurting it.

It-it... it's soft. Come on, snake.
Come on, little snake.

Everybody, get down!

[screaming, shouting]

Rachel, you brought
a gun in our fucking house?

You guys, I am...
I am handling this.

Rachel, don't you dare shoot
that fucking snake in my house!

Okay, okay, okay. It's moving.
I'm all good. [knocking on door]

Okay, somebody's at the door.

[women shouting]
I got it. I got it.

Rachel, my baby is outside
the fucking door.

I'm not shooting Malia.
I'm shooting the snake!

- Rachel!
- Guys, I'm freaking out! Be quiet!

- Mommy.
- Hi, baby.

- Hi. Hi.
- Hi. Hi.

Hi. So, we've got
a bit of a situation.

It's totally fine.
It's an adult situation.

Could you just go upstairs, 20
minutes... Do you want me to help you?

- Put the gun down, Rachel.
- Uh, no.

Absolutely not. Thank you. We've
got it super under control.

Down! Put the gun down!

[women yelling]
Please stop yelling at me.

Repeat, "I am not insane,"
and put the gun down.

Okay, okay, I'm sorry!
Stop yelling! I'm sorry.

[The Guy groans]
Okay, okay, should I drop it?

Shit. Don't drop the gun.
Just put it down.

On the table. Okay, putting it...
I'm moving the cheese.

I'm moving the cheese. I'm putting
it down. I'm putting it down.

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, you guys.
I love you.

It's just...
he seems nice.

You brought a gun into this house?

All right! Sisters, listen!

We gotta get this fucking
snake out of the apartment.

Who is with me?

- I am with you. Are you kidding me?
- We're with you.

I am supporting you from here!

Wait a sec.
I think I know that snake.

What? I've... I mean,
I don't know the snake.

I delivered down the hall to somebody.

I saw the snake.
His name is Fagin.

Or her name is Fagin.
I don't know.

It's a neighbor's snake.
Fagin. Fagin.

[indistinct chatter] No, no, no, no.
Don't. Don't.

I just don't think that you
should... You know what?

Everyone shut
the fuck up for a second.

You should pick it up
by both ends to support it.

I'm supporting it.
You need the butt too.

Pick it up
the right way. Don't...

[excited chattering]

All right, move! Move!

Move. Move. Move.

Move. Move!

Oh... shit.
It's down the hall.

Okay, all right, just don't...

Careful. Careful.
All right.

That's not the one.
That's not... That's not the one.

Hey!

Are you guys in that snake club?

Snake club?

What's that? I don't know what that is.
What does that mean?

What are you talking about?
We don't know what that is.

Sorry.
I'm looking for a cat.

Just keep going.
[indistinct chatter]

Be careful! We'll let you know
if we see the cat. Sorry.

Hey, guys, it's 1K.

Sorry I called you "guys."
Sorry I said "guys."

? ?

- sync and corrections by Zac -
www.addic7ed.com

[music slows]

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