Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,063 --> 00:00:02,828
All right, quickly finish
shutting up, everybody.
2
00:00:03,508 --> 00:00:05,350
I have an awesome new Miles mission.
3
00:00:05,810 --> 00:00:07,821
We're gonna make him a deadbeat dad.
4
00:00:08,412 --> 00:00:10,349
Hold up, wouldn't he
have to be a dad first?
5
00:00:10,350 --> 00:00:12,134
[CHUCKLES] Dan, you're great at this class.
6
00:00:12,159 --> 00:00:13,126
I am?
7
00:00:13,128 --> 00:00:14,625
So I was looking for dirt on Miles,
8
00:00:14,626 --> 00:00:16,126
and I found an old
photograph of us together
9
00:00:16,128 --> 00:00:18,564
with this girl, Theresa,
that he had a fling with.
10
00:00:18,589 --> 00:00:22,057
Now, if he had gotten her
pregnant without realizing it,
11
00:00:22,059 --> 00:00:24,193
then their child would now be,
12
00:00:24,195 --> 00:00:26,862
oh, about your age.
13
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,259
What're you do... Anthony?
14
00:00:32,321 --> 00:00:33,683
Pass the photo around.
15
00:00:34,472 --> 00:00:35,771
Well, look at it first.
16
00:00:35,773 --> 00:00:37,172
Never mind... Anyway...
17
00:00:37,174 --> 00:00:39,484
One of you is gonna
bring this photo to Miles
18
00:00:39,484 --> 00:00:40,883
and say that that's your mom,
19
00:00:40,885 --> 00:00:42,736
and that you're his kid that he abandoned.
20
00:00:43,137 --> 00:00:45,070
Voila. Deadbeat dad.
21
00:00:45,072 --> 00:00:47,472
And the best part is,
you're gonna tell him this
22
00:00:47,474 --> 00:00:51,209
right before he walks on stage
in Detroit for a TED Talk.
23
00:00:51,211 --> 00:00:53,078
It's gonna totally mess with his head.
24
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:55,256
It's gonna ruin his presentation.
25
00:00:55,816 --> 00:00:57,382
The only question that remains is,
26
00:00:57,382 --> 00:01:00,116
Which one of you can most convincingly
27
00:01:00,118 --> 00:01:02,516
play the role of Miles' kid?
28
00:01:03,121 --> 00:01:04,500
Let me see what you guys got.
29
00:01:06,005 --> 00:01:08,305
I've missed you ever since I was a...
30
00:01:08,307 --> 00:01:09,774
Too slow. Too slow.
31
00:01:09,776 --> 00:01:12,386
Okay, Heather. You're
face to face with Miles.
32
00:01:12,819 --> 00:01:14,145
What're you gonna do?
33
00:01:14,921 --> 00:01:16,854
Well, hey there, big daddy.
34
00:01:16,856 --> 00:01:18,876
Nope. Mm-mm, wrong tone.
35
00:01:19,259 --> 00:01:22,093
Am I the only one who feels
like making Miles think
36
00:01:22,095 --> 00:01:24,562
he has a kid might be
going a little too far?
37
00:01:24,564 --> 00:01:25,897
Miles is lame.
38
00:01:25,899 --> 00:01:27,832
He deserves everything
that's coming to him.
39
00:01:27,834 --> 00:01:30,268
He's peddling these fake philosophies
40
00:01:30,270 --> 00:01:33,489
to the ignorant masses and he knows better.
41
00:01:33,740 --> 00:01:35,339
Yes. Devin gets it.
42
00:01:35,341 --> 00:01:37,308
This is exactly what
I've been talking about.
43
00:01:37,310 --> 00:01:38,523
Okay, Devin. So...
44
00:01:39,211 --> 00:01:40,897
Tell me how you break the news to him.
45
00:01:41,414 --> 00:01:44,454
Miles, you're my dad, and you suck.
46
00:01:45,940 --> 00:01:48,908
There's our guy, right there.
The Prince of Darkness is back.
47
00:01:48,910 --> 00:01:50,776
I love it. I'm gonna need to confiscate
48
00:01:50,778 --> 00:01:52,123
that knife from you, though, bud.
49
00:01:52,123 --> 00:01:53,389
Uh, I think I've let
things get a little bit
50
00:01:53,390 --> 00:01:54,656
too loose around here.
51
00:01:54,658 --> 00:01:55,890
Go ahead and finish crossing the A
52
00:01:55,892 --> 00:01:57,458
on your anarchy thing, though.
53
00:01:57,460 --> 00:01:58,693
[RAMONES' "LISTEN TO MY HEART"]
54
00:01:58,695 --> 00:02:00,228
One, two, three, four!
55
00:02:00,230 --> 00:02:02,697
? Next time I'll
listen to my heart ?
56
00:02:02,699 --> 00:02:05,733
? Next time well,
I'll be smart ?
57
00:02:05,735 --> 00:02:09,735
?
58
00:02:13,476 --> 00:02:15,177
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
59
00:02:17,747 --> 00:02:19,310
Hey, Ralphie.
60
00:02:19,783 --> 00:02:21,449
Hello, ladies.
61
00:02:21,451 --> 00:02:24,986
We need you to sign off on
the Sadie Hawkins Dance theme.
62
00:02:24,988 --> 00:02:27,021
We're doing '80s again, okay?
63
00:02:27,023 --> 00:02:29,257
Leg-warmers and side ponies, y'all.
64
00:02:29,726 --> 00:02:31,426
Well, I don't know if
you guys have noticed,
65
00:02:31,428 --> 00:02:34,262
but since Brenda and I separated,
66
00:02:34,264 --> 00:02:37,098
I have been doing my own thang.
67
00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:38,466
- [EXCITED CHATTER]
- Oh!
68
00:02:38,468 --> 00:02:40,535
That's why we came to you, Durb Daddy.
69
00:02:40,537 --> 00:02:44,338
Thank you, but... but I was
thinking that a good theme
70
00:02:44,340 --> 00:02:47,059
for the dance would be...
71
00:02:48,378 --> 00:02:50,500
The movie "Congo."
72
00:02:50,747 --> 00:02:52,447
Based on the Michael Crichton novel.
73
00:02:52,449 --> 00:02:53,948
It's got everything teens love.
74
00:02:53,950 --> 00:02:55,883
It's got gorillas, it's got lasers,
75
00:02:55,885 --> 00:02:58,773
it's got a character
named Herkermer Homolka.
76
00:03:00,905 --> 00:03:03,270
Oh. I've seen that look.
77
00:03:03,727 --> 00:03:05,523
Got that look from Brenda for ten years.
78
00:03:05,572 --> 00:03:06,631
She...
79
00:03:06,773 --> 00:03:08,139
She hated all my ideas too.
80
00:03:08,141 --> 00:03:10,699
I'm, it's just...
81
00:03:11,883 --> 00:03:13,161
Mary?
82
00:03:13,410 --> 00:03:15,043
Um, it's just, uh,
83
00:03:15,045 --> 00:03:16,878
obscure movies that no one's seen
84
00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:18,513
- don't make great dance themes.
- Mm-mm.
85
00:03:18,515 --> 00:03:20,882
I'm sorry... You guys have never seen this?
86
00:03:20,884 --> 00:03:23,318
Okay, guys, you gotta
watch this, all right?
87
00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:25,287
And... and if you still
don't think it's a good idea
88
00:03:25,289 --> 00:03:27,322
for a dance, then we won't do it.
89
00:03:27,324 --> 00:03:29,373
- Okay, that's... that's fair.
- Okay.
90
00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:32,360
[TENSE MUSIC]
91
00:03:33,318 --> 00:03:35,396
- [CHATTER]
- [EXHALES DEEPLY]
92
00:03:37,100 --> 00:03:39,034
?
93
00:03:39,036 --> 00:03:40,437
Okay, all right, all right, listen.
94
00:03:40,671 --> 00:03:42,550
Get in there and rattle him.
95
00:03:43,226 --> 00:03:44,742
Rattle him good.
96
00:03:45,494 --> 00:03:47,460
?
97
00:03:47,912 --> 00:03:48,962
Mr. Leonard?
98
00:03:48,964 --> 00:03:51,097
Uh, if you want a selfie,
we're gonna have to be quick,
99
00:03:51,099 --> 00:03:53,200
'cause I've got an awful lot
of people out there who...
100
00:03:53,202 --> 00:03:56,376
17 years ago you had sex with
my mom, which makes you my dad.
101
00:03:59,808 --> 00:04:01,242
Huh? Her? Oh.
102
00:04:02,841 --> 00:04:04,794
Theresa Cantrell is your mum?
103
00:04:05,144 --> 00:04:06,743
Theresa the teaser, we used to...
104
00:04:06,745 --> 00:04:08,412
I have a lot of complicated feelings,
105
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:09,864
and I'm sure you do as well.
106
00:04:09,948 --> 00:04:12,436
I gotta say, I feel, uh, pretty neglected.
107
00:04:12,951 --> 00:04:14,430
A little angry.
108
00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:16,219
Sorry about the timing.
109
00:04:16,221 --> 00:04:17,959
I hope it doesn't mess up your speech.
110
00:04:22,133 --> 00:04:23,204
A son.
111
00:04:24,601 --> 00:04:26,478
[LAUGHS] Oh, my goodness.
112
00:04:26,796 --> 00:04:29,246
My life just keeps
getting better and better.
113
00:04:29,799 --> 00:04:31,431
All right, let's have a look at you then.
114
00:04:31,433 --> 00:04:32,967
Oh, you're a big lad. [GASPS]
115
00:04:33,469 --> 00:04:34,868
Look at those eyes. [LAUGHS]
116
00:04:34,870 --> 00:04:36,497
Beautiful... They're mine. [GASPS]
117
00:04:36,497 --> 00:04:38,363
And you've got the forehead.
You've... we've... got...
118
00:04:38,365 --> 00:04:41,633
You've got the same
highly expressive forehead.
119
00:04:41,635 --> 00:04:43,629
- Oh, my goodness me.
- You're on.
120
00:04:43,654 --> 00:04:46,229
Yeah, got it, right. I've
gotta go and do the...
121
00:04:47,141 --> 00:04:48,941
And you wait here, and I'll be back.
122
00:04:48,943 --> 00:04:50,449
- [CROWD CHANTING]
- Uh...
123
00:04:51,745 --> 00:04:54,513
[UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC]
124
00:04:54,515 --> 00:04:55,714
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
125
00:04:55,716 --> 00:04:58,880
Hello, Detroit! I have a son!
126
00:04:59,053 --> 00:05:01,146
- Yeah!
- [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
127
00:05:04,792 --> 00:05:06,282
[SIGHS] Well,
128
00:05:07,227 --> 00:05:09,428
Miles was unfazed.
129
00:05:09,430 --> 00:05:12,043
It's like the meaner you
are to him, the nicer he is.
130
00:05:12,068 --> 00:05:14,800
What kind of a dork is thrilled to find out
131
00:05:14,802 --> 00:05:17,202
that he's been saddled
with an unwanted child?
132
00:05:17,204 --> 00:05:18,913
[PHONE CHIMING]
133
00:05:20,490 --> 00:05:22,356
Ah, and that's him calling me right now.
134
00:05:22,381 --> 00:05:23,599
- Yeah?
- Jack.
135
00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:24,807
Hello, old mate.
136
00:05:24,807 --> 00:05:26,173
Do you remember Theresa the teaser?
137
00:05:26,174 --> 00:05:28,074
- Mm-hmm.
- Well, long story short,
138
00:05:28,076 --> 00:05:31,010
she had a baby, and
now I have a son.
139
00:05:31,012 --> 00:05:33,313
And you'll never guess,
he lives in Toledo,
140
00:05:33,315 --> 00:05:34,300
your hometown,
141
00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:36,841
which is where I am right this minute.
142
00:05:37,232 --> 00:05:39,399
Wait, you're in Toledo? Right now?
143
00:05:40,357 --> 00:05:43,552
So we watched the movie "Congo."
144
00:05:43,780 --> 00:05:45,146
And it was good.
145
00:05:45,148 --> 00:05:47,348
- It was very good.
- Very good.
146
00:05:47,350 --> 00:05:49,981
What was your favorite part?
Don't think, just answer.
147
00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:52,953
Easy, when the gorilla
drinks a martini and burps.
148
00:05:52,994 --> 00:05:54,447
- [LAUGHS]
- Me too!
149
00:05:54,492 --> 00:05:57,610
And while that is all very... funny?
150
00:05:57,635 --> 00:06:00,936
Um, I'm actually starting
to think, just a little bit,
151
00:06:01,145 --> 00:06:03,579
how would you turn that into a dance theme?
152
00:06:03,581 --> 00:06:04,991
As much as I would love to.
153
00:06:04,991 --> 00:06:08,425
Yeah, Durbin, it's like,
What were you even picturing?
154
00:06:08,428 --> 00:06:10,762
How were you even gonna decorate, Ralph?
155
00:06:10,764 --> 00:06:12,497
Take the jungle foliage sets
156
00:06:12,499 --> 00:06:14,543
from last year's production
of "South Pacific"?
157
00:06:15,698 --> 00:06:17,396
Oh, my... Guys, I'm... I'm seeing this.
158
00:06:17,397 --> 00:06:18,950
- This could work.
- Me too.
159
00:06:18,975 --> 00:06:20,156
I can't believe it.
160
00:06:20,181 --> 00:06:22,332
I think we're all actually
coming around to "Congo."
161
00:06:22,333 --> 00:06:24,099
- [LAUGHS]
- BOTH: No!
162
00:06:24,101 --> 00:06:25,596
Uh, stop it, Michelle.
163
00:06:26,043 --> 00:06:27,676
Sorry to hurt your feelings, Durbin,
164
00:06:27,677 --> 00:06:28,976
but "Congo" as the dance theme
165
00:06:28,978 --> 00:06:30,594
is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
166
00:06:31,614 --> 00:06:33,125
It's worse than Fish Week.
167
00:06:33,942 --> 00:06:35,308
Brenda hated Fish Week.
168
00:06:35,310 --> 00:06:38,444
She said it was "unsanitary nonsense."
169
00:06:38,446 --> 00:06:42,270
But, I guess, all my ideas are bad,
170
00:06:42,295 --> 00:06:43,478
aren't they?
171
00:06:44,219 --> 00:06:47,448
You know, you guys, just
do the '80s dance and...
172
00:06:47,956 --> 00:06:49,789
Just do whatever you want.
173
00:06:49,791 --> 00:06:52,659
[MELANCHOLY MUSIC]
174
00:06:52,661 --> 00:06:55,091
[TAPS KEYS FORCEFULLY,
VOCALIZES DOWNTRODDEN TUNE]
175
00:06:55,530 --> 00:06:58,164
Guys, this is bad. He
can't know that I live here.
176
00:06:58,166 --> 00:07:00,099
And he can't know that I teach high school.
177
00:07:00,101 --> 00:07:01,367
You can always point out the fact
178
00:07:01,369 --> 00:07:03,069
that you don't teach anything.
179
00:07:03,071 --> 00:07:05,638
What kind of a twisted sicko just shows up
180
00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:07,607
to see his abandoned son?
181
00:07:07,609 --> 00:07:09,083
So pathetic.
182
00:07:09,335 --> 00:07:10,902
Drives all the way here uninvited.
183
00:07:10,904 --> 00:07:13,527
It's like he's so desperate for love.
184
00:07:14,289 --> 00:07:15,708
Yeah, yeah.
185
00:07:17,544 --> 00:07:18,544
You're right.
186
00:07:19,212 --> 00:07:21,145
He's desperate. We can use that.
187
00:07:21,466 --> 00:07:25,340
Okay, so, you need to embrace
your relationship to Miles.
188
00:07:25,379 --> 00:07:27,918
Make him really love you, and then...
189
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,314
[CLICKS TONGUE] Reject him. Hard.
190
00:07:30,316 --> 00:07:32,770
And then we can see if old Miles can float.
191
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,952
Uh, too far, Prince of D.
192
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:36,621
Why don't we just stick
to the emotional crushing?
193
00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:38,356
I don't know, I feel like the moral compass
194
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:39,991
is thumbs down on this one.
195
00:07:40,140 --> 00:07:42,136
Yeah, and I feel like I'm pretty
thumbs down on you, Marcus.
196
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:43,183
Great.
197
00:07:43,208 --> 00:07:46,176
Okay, guys, I need some
ideas for Miles bonding time.
198
00:07:46,178 --> 00:07:48,011
What do you guys like to do
with your parents around here?
199
00:07:48,013 --> 00:07:51,133
You know, the Toledo
Walleye hockey games are fun.
200
00:07:51,372 --> 00:07:53,005
My family has season tickets.
201
00:07:53,008 --> 00:07:54,273
And I'm taking my little brother, Jeffy,
202
00:07:54,275 --> 00:07:55,313
tomorrow night.
203
00:07:56,144 --> 00:07:58,378
My man. Dan, that's perfect.
204
00:07:58,380 --> 00:07:59,941
Okay, so, Devin.
205
00:07:59,993 --> 00:08:02,414
Tomorrow you'll go sightseeing
with Miles after school.
206
00:08:02,439 --> 00:08:05,474
And then, end the evening
at a Walleye hockey game.
207
00:08:05,476 --> 00:08:07,978
Ah, you know how to really
set him up for rejection?
208
00:08:09,180 --> 00:08:10,541
Call him "Dad."
209
00:08:11,126 --> 00:08:13,327
Then it's time for the
pièce de r�sistance.
210
00:08:13,328 --> 00:08:15,494
Tell him you want nothing to do with him.
211
00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:18,431
[ROCK MUSIC]
212
00:08:18,433 --> 00:08:19,832
?
213
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:22,268
Here's to our first Toledo hotdog.
214
00:08:22,270 --> 00:08:23,269
Cheers!
215
00:08:23,271 --> 00:08:25,805
?
216
00:08:25,807 --> 00:08:27,686
I'm gonna need more of these.
217
00:08:28,910 --> 00:08:32,378
The archduke of Slovenia said,
"Miles, if you'll not take
218
00:08:32,380 --> 00:08:36,198
my daughter, please have
these antique dueling pistols."
219
00:08:36,351 --> 00:08:38,451
- [BOTH SCREAMING]
- [LAUGHS]
220
00:08:39,921 --> 00:08:42,655
?
221
00:08:42,657 --> 00:08:44,616
Those poachers weren't coming back...
222
00:08:44,617 --> 00:08:45,617
Ow.
223
00:08:46,719 --> 00:08:47,785
[LAUGHING]
224
00:08:47,787 --> 00:08:50,454
? Me and my man ?
225
00:08:50,456 --> 00:08:53,324
? Me and my main man ?
226
00:08:53,326 --> 00:08:54,592
? Me and my man ?
227
00:08:54,594 --> 00:08:55,997
Oh, thank you.
228
00:08:56,830 --> 00:08:58,627
[LAUGHTER] Look at us!
229
00:08:59,894 --> 00:09:01,199
[LAUGHS] Wow.
230
00:09:01,482 --> 00:09:03,181
- That was so good, wasn't it?
- Yeah.
231
00:09:03,269 --> 00:09:05,659
Right, next, onto the game.
232
00:09:06,406 --> 00:09:08,406
?
233
00:09:08,408 --> 00:09:09,461
Come on.
234
00:09:10,176 --> 00:09:13,967
CROWD: Let's go, Walleyes.
Let's go, Walleyes.
235
00:09:17,283 --> 00:09:21,152
[CHEERING]
236
00:09:21,585 --> 00:09:22,952
This is perfect.
237
00:09:23,189 --> 00:09:25,089
Matching father-son hats.
238
00:09:25,091 --> 00:09:27,225
Did you know Miles has a set
of antique dueling pistols?
239
00:09:27,227 --> 00:09:29,060
Don't get sucked into Miles' world, okay?
240
00:09:29,062 --> 00:09:30,428
Stay focused.
241
00:09:30,430 --> 00:09:32,987
Go give him the hats, play the dad card,
242
00:09:33,299 --> 00:09:34,866
break his heart. Go.
243
00:09:38,104 --> 00:09:39,617
- [LOUD THUD]
- Ooh.
244
00:09:39,939 --> 00:09:42,206
[BUZZER BLARES]
245
00:09:42,208 --> 00:09:44,342
Oh, mate, amazing.
246
00:09:44,344 --> 00:09:46,644
A couple of matching fish bubble hats.
247
00:09:46,646 --> 00:09:47,798
Thank you.
248
00:09:49,883 --> 00:09:51,082
Yep. [CHUCKLES]
249
00:09:51,084 --> 00:09:52,983
Oh, one question.
250
00:09:54,854 --> 00:09:56,892
What do I do with these bad boys?
251
00:09:57,390 --> 00:09:58,536
Hey. [CHUCKLES]
252
00:09:59,877 --> 00:10:02,526
Oh, what a couple of willies
in a biscuit, then, eh?
253
00:10:02,528 --> 00:10:03,787
[LAUGHS]
254
00:10:04,664 --> 00:10:06,809
Look, Danny, it's me!
255
00:10:09,035 --> 00:10:11,819
[LAUGHS] Look at that kid, he's amazing.
256
00:10:15,942 --> 00:10:18,643
Dan, tell Jeffy to stop dancing.
257
00:10:18,645 --> 00:10:20,111
Hey, you tell Jeffy to stop dancing.
258
00:10:20,113 --> 00:10:21,746
Because half these people come to the games
259
00:10:21,748 --> 00:10:23,381
just to see Jeffy dance.
260
00:10:23,383 --> 00:10:25,283
[CHEERING]
261
00:10:25,285 --> 00:10:27,389
CROWD: Let's go, Walleyes!
262
00:10:28,054 --> 00:10:31,789
[CHEERING]
263
00:10:31,791 --> 00:10:34,592
CROWD: Let's go, Walleyes!
264
00:10:34,594 --> 00:10:36,394
It was truly breathtaking,
265
00:10:36,396 --> 00:10:38,062
but I had no one to share it with.
266
00:10:38,064 --> 00:10:39,505
You climbed Everest?
267
00:10:39,766 --> 00:10:41,564
I've always wanted to do that.
268
00:10:41,734 --> 00:10:43,868
I heard it's covered in frozen corpses.
269
00:10:43,870 --> 00:10:45,125
Well, you can.
270
00:10:45,150 --> 00:10:46,871
Devin, you're... You're a great lad,
271
00:10:46,873 --> 00:10:49,407
and you deserve to see
all the beautiful views
272
00:10:49,409 --> 00:10:52,212
and corpses your... Your
little heart desires.
273
00:10:54,423 --> 00:10:55,808
[TEXT MESSAGE CHIMES]
274
00:10:56,749 --> 00:11:00,101
- Oh, nearly. Nearly.
- _
275
00:11:02,755 --> 00:11:04,355
It kills me to have to do this,
276
00:11:04,357 --> 00:11:06,257
but I've got an early flight
to catch back to Stanford.
277
00:11:06,259 --> 00:11:08,039
Thank you for today. I've had...
278
00:11:08,895 --> 00:11:10,622
an amazing time, and...
279
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:13,240
I'm never gonna forget today.
280
00:11:14,998 --> 00:11:17,935
Thanks... Dad.
281
00:11:17,937 --> 00:11:20,538
[TENDER MUSIC]
282
00:11:20,540 --> 00:11:21,586
Huh.
283
00:11:23,831 --> 00:11:25,551
[STAMMERS] Come here, son.
284
00:11:26,245 --> 00:11:30,245
?
285
00:11:31,333 --> 00:11:32,366
Cheers.
286
00:11:32,544 --> 00:11:35,646
Uh, sorry, guys, can I get
out? Thank you, thank you.
287
00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:37,417
Buh-bye. Cheerio.
288
00:11:38,024 --> 00:11:41,018
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
289
00:11:42,228 --> 00:11:43,412
Hey, hey!
290
00:11:44,130 --> 00:11:45,597
Why didn't you tell him you hate him?
291
00:11:45,599 --> 00:11:46,731
I'm sorry, Mr. Griffin.
292
00:11:46,733 --> 00:11:48,166
I hesitated and ran out of time.
293
00:11:48,168 --> 00:11:49,601
Can we just get Miles some other way?
294
00:11:49,603 --> 00:11:51,902
No, there is no other way. This is the way.
295
00:11:53,603 --> 00:11:54,672
All right, come on, let's go.
296
00:11:54,674 --> 00:11:56,975
Not yet. I don't wanna wake Jeffy.
297
00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:58,676
I literally have to do everything.
298
00:11:58,678 --> 00:11:59,911
All right, fine, give me Jeffy.
299
00:11:59,913 --> 00:12:01,446
Come on. All right, Jeffy, let's go.
300
00:12:01,448 --> 00:12:03,014
- Come on, Jeffy.
- [GROANS]
301
00:12:03,016 --> 00:12:03,982
Okay.
302
00:12:03,984 --> 00:12:05,326
[WHISPERING] All right.
303
00:12:05,552 --> 00:12:07,752
I'll figure out how to keep
Miles in Toledo another day.
304
00:12:07,754 --> 00:12:09,354
You figure out how to
grow some balls, all right?
305
00:12:09,356 --> 00:12:10,443
Finish him!
306
00:12:10,590 --> 00:12:12,257
- [JEFFY GROANING]
- Ah, okay, shh.
307
00:12:12,259 --> 00:12:13,781
It's all right. Come here, Jeffy.
308
00:12:13,782 --> 00:12:15,048
[CHEERING]
309
00:12:18,395 --> 00:12:20,696
[CLASSICAL MUSIC RINGTONE]
310
00:12:21,043 --> 00:12:23,432
- Hello, Jack-o!
- Miles-o.
311
00:12:23,739 --> 00:12:25,306
Uh, how'd it go with your son?
312
00:12:25,308 --> 00:12:27,441
It must've felt nice to
say sorry for having missed
313
00:12:27,443 --> 00:12:30,110
every significant event in his entire life,
314
00:12:30,112 --> 00:12:33,080
you know, baseball
games, recitals...
315
00:12:33,082 --> 00:12:34,961
Aw, his wobbly first step.
316
00:12:36,185 --> 00:12:38,702
Well, I... I didn't exactly get a chance to
317
00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:40,854
tell him all those things.
318
00:12:40,856 --> 00:12:42,423
Ah, that's a shame.
319
00:12:42,425 --> 00:12:44,592
I would've killed to
hear my absentee father
320
00:12:44,594 --> 00:12:46,393
say sorry to me for
missing all that stuff
321
00:12:46,395 --> 00:12:48,128
in my life, you know, in person.
322
00:12:48,128 --> 00:12:49,380
My two cents?
323
00:12:49,731 --> 00:12:52,003
I think it's worth, uh,
sticking around one more day
324
00:12:52,028 --> 00:12:53,076
to tell him all that.
325
00:12:53,101 --> 00:12:56,736
You know Jack, that is
smarter than a seaman's cleats.
326
00:12:56,738 --> 00:12:58,471
That can't be an actual British expression.
327
00:12:58,759 --> 00:13:00,744
All right, cheerio, me old China.
328
00:13:01,376 --> 00:13:04,544
- Uh-oh.
- D-D-Durbie Fully Loaded.
329
00:13:04,944 --> 00:13:07,111
Let me guess, you guys are here to tell me
330
00:13:07,113 --> 00:13:08,912
that eating salty soup out of a cup
331
00:13:08,914 --> 00:13:10,948
is another one of my bad ideas?
332
00:13:10,950 --> 00:13:12,616
No, Durbs, we're actually here to tell you
333
00:13:12,618 --> 00:13:14,513
that we are totally on board for "Congo."
334
00:13:15,020 --> 00:13:17,801
Like you said before, it's a bad idea.
335
00:13:17,826 --> 00:13:20,126
We were talking about it and
realized we're the only ones
336
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:21,626
who care about the dance theme.
337
00:13:21,651 --> 00:13:22,627
Yeah.
338
00:13:22,627 --> 00:13:24,260
The kids don't pay
attention to the decorations.
339
00:13:24,262 --> 00:13:25,753
They just see them as
something to hide behind
340
00:13:25,778 --> 00:13:27,110
so they can grab up on a butt.
341
00:13:27,135 --> 00:13:28,935
Mm-hmm, yeah, it makes no difference
342
00:13:28,937 --> 00:13:30,904
whether they're honking on
each other's little [BLEEP]
343
00:13:30,906 --> 00:13:34,474
behind a jungle in the Congo,
or a big '80s Rubik's Cube.
344
00:13:34,476 --> 00:13:35,876
I mean, it's true.
345
00:13:35,878 --> 00:13:38,018
The... these dances
are a full-on dog park.
346
00:13:38,018 --> 00:13:39,184
In every way.
347
00:13:39,185 --> 00:13:40,930
I found two poops last year.
348
00:13:41,087 --> 00:13:42,363
[WHISPERS] Human.
349
00:13:42,455 --> 00:13:44,685
Ralph, we just wanna support you.
350
00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:47,635
I mean, that means so much
more to us than some theme.
351
00:13:47,894 --> 00:13:50,157
You guys are the best.
352
00:13:51,015 --> 00:13:52,015
Listen.
353
00:13:52,645 --> 00:13:55,179
Keep this under your hats, okay?
354
00:13:55,181 --> 00:13:57,481
We don't want some other
school stealing our theme.
355
00:13:57,483 --> 00:13:59,685
We are literally, um, never
356
00:13:59,710 --> 00:14:01,835
telling anyone about this.
357
00:14:02,262 --> 00:14:04,082
Ever. Okay?
358
00:14:04,229 --> 00:14:06,007
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
359
00:14:07,566 --> 00:14:10,834
[CLOCK TICKING]
360
00:14:17,694 --> 00:14:19,467
Uh, sorry to interrupt.
361
00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:24,844
Is this... is this Biology class?
362
00:14:25,566 --> 00:14:27,832
Ah, hah, there he is.
363
00:14:28,142 --> 00:14:29,642
Miles, what're you doing here?
364
00:14:29,644 --> 00:14:33,279
Well, I... I realized that
I never apologized to you,
365
00:14:33,281 --> 00:14:35,294
for missing out on... Well, I've missed...
366
00:14:35,448 --> 00:14:36,782
Missing out on everything
367
00:14:36,784 --> 00:14:38,017
until yesterday.
368
00:14:38,029 --> 00:14:40,353
And I wanted to swear to you
that I'm gonna make that right.
369
00:14:40,408 --> 00:14:42,407
Money's no object. You
know, whatever it costs.
370
00:14:42,432 --> 00:14:43,799
I'll fly backwards and forwards.
371
00:14:43,801 --> 00:14:47,277
Whatever it takes to... To be your dad.
372
00:14:47,504 --> 00:14:48,782
I can't do this.
373
00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:51,242
- You're not my dad.
- No, I...
374
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:52,808
Completely understand that.
375
00:14:52,810 --> 00:14:54,442
And I will work to earn that title.
376
00:14:54,444 --> 00:14:56,121
No, I mean it, I'm not your son.
377
00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:02,690
But we... we've got the same...
378
00:15:03,404 --> 00:15:04,686
Expressive forehead.
379
00:15:04,688 --> 00:15:06,288
Well, actually, the forehead's not really
380
00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:07,522
an identifying characteristic.
381
00:15:07,524 --> 00:15:09,054
Okay, shh, bud. Who are you?
382
00:15:11,728 --> 00:15:13,126
I didn't mean any of it.
383
00:15:15,645 --> 00:15:17,165
- I'm sorry.
- Why?
384
00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,318
Wha... I don't...
385
00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:21,053
Oh, I was excited about us. I... I felt...
386
00:15:21,338 --> 00:15:23,747
I was gonna have a
fuller life 'cause of you.
387
00:15:24,185 --> 00:15:25,227
And then...
388
00:15:33,785 --> 00:15:35,065
[RETCHES]
389
00:15:45,589 --> 00:15:46,833
You're a monster.
390
00:15:51,610 --> 00:15:53,024
[WHEEZING LAUGH]
391
00:15:53,302 --> 00:15:56,269
Whoa!
Whoa-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
392
00:15:56,458 --> 00:15:59,060
Whoo! Holy crap, uh!
393
00:15:59,735 --> 00:16:01,568
Now, if I'm not mistaken,
394
00:16:01,570 --> 00:16:03,470
that is a garbage can
filled with Miles' puke.
395
00:16:03,783 --> 00:16:04,864
Yeah?
396
00:16:04,879 --> 00:16:06,879
And from what I was seeing,
it's 'cause he's a broken man.
397
00:16:06,904 --> 00:16:08,370
Am I right? Okay.
398
00:16:08,558 --> 00:16:11,004
Well, then this calls for a celebration.
399
00:16:11,202 --> 00:16:13,035
Uh-uh! Whoo!
400
00:16:13,037 --> 00:16:16,873
We did it, baby. Oh, it was glorious, mmm.
401
00:16:17,348 --> 00:16:18,483
[LAUGHS]
402
00:16:19,650 --> 00:16:21,142
What's... what is this?
403
00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:31,641
What?
404
00:16:33,313 --> 00:16:34,578
I'm sorry, what is going on here?
405
00:16:34,646 --> 00:16:36,281
What... What's the deal?
406
00:16:36,306 --> 00:16:39,140
Guys, we... we succeeded. Let's celebrate!
407
00:16:39,209 --> 00:16:40,842
He's a good guy and we broke him.
408
00:16:40,910 --> 00:16:41,937
For what?
409
00:16:44,681 --> 00:16:47,324
For America! [LAUGHS]
410
00:16:47,324 --> 00:16:48,533
I don't know.
411
00:16:49,128 --> 00:16:50,887
What, are you trying to
guilt me with your silence?
412
00:16:50,931 --> 00:16:52,130
That's not gonna work.
413
00:16:52,155 --> 00:16:53,487
Look, it's not like I don't know
414
00:16:53,556 --> 00:16:54,956
what you guys are
thinking anyway, you know.
415
00:16:55,024 --> 00:16:56,257
Anthony's over there like,
416
00:16:56,326 --> 00:16:57,878
[MOCKING VOICE] I'm judgy Anthony.
417
00:16:57,974 --> 00:16:59,607
You know? Victor's sitting there like,
418
00:16:59,676 --> 00:17:00,909
[MOCKING VOICE] I think this may have
419
00:17:00,977 --> 00:17:02,343
gotten out of hand, Mr. Griffin.
420
00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:03,734
I think it has.
421
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:04,972
And Marcus is like,
422
00:17:05,057 --> 00:17:06,723
[MOCKING VOICE] At the risk of being
423
00:17:06,792 --> 00:17:08,391
a permanent virgin,
don't you think you should
424
00:17:08,460 --> 00:17:10,666
come clean and tell Miles
it wasn't Devin's fault?
425
00:17:11,646 --> 00:17:12,662
And Sarika's like,
426
00:17:12,731 --> 00:17:13,997
[MOCKING VOICE] I think I speak on behalf
427
00:17:14,066 --> 00:17:15,666
of all the nerds in the whole wide world
428
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:17,495
when I say you're a bad guy, Mr. Griffin.
429
00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:18,994
Sarika's right, as usual.
430
00:17:19,063 --> 00:17:21,597
Come on, you guys. All
of you are gonna be fine.
431
00:17:21,665 --> 00:17:24,199
Okay? Look at me, I'm fine. You know?
432
00:17:24,268 --> 00:17:25,934
I feel f... I feel great, actually.
433
00:17:26,003 --> 00:17:27,071
I... I think, um...
434
00:17:27,848 --> 00:17:28,835
I think we did a...
435
00:17:28,835 --> 00:17:31,455
I think we did the world
a... A service today.
436
00:17:32,507 --> 00:17:33,606
Hmm?
437
00:17:34,164 --> 00:17:36,224
So you guys can sit there
and stare at me all you want.
438
00:17:36,249 --> 00:17:38,350
That's not gonna... Not
gonna make me feel guilty,
439
00:17:38,375 --> 00:17:39,827
if that's what you're going
for, that's what I'm saying.
440
00:17:39,852 --> 00:17:40,912
I... I feel good.
441
00:17:42,631 --> 00:17:46,066
[CLOCK TICKING]
442
00:17:46,135 --> 00:17:47,167
I'm gonna go piss.
443
00:17:47,236 --> 00:17:50,103
[PLAYFUL MUSIC]
444
00:17:50,172 --> 00:17:54,172
?
445
00:17:54,959 --> 00:17:57,544
[SIGHS] Hey, Miles, hey.
446
00:17:57,613 --> 00:17:59,909
Whoa-ho, hey. Uh, Jack.
447
00:18:00,916 --> 00:18:02,115
Is that you?
448
00:18:02,184 --> 00:18:04,351
Yes, it's me. Here in Toledo.
449
00:18:04,420 --> 00:18:06,687
I don't understand.
What are you doing here?
450
00:18:06,869 --> 00:18:09,255
'Cause I, I was here with
my son... he's not my...
451
00:18:09,288 --> 00:18:10,821
- He's just some...
- I know.
452
00:18:10,846 --> 00:18:12,670
- Guy that pretended...
- I'm gonna explain all that. Look, um...
453
00:18:13,290 --> 00:18:15,524
I never got picked up by another university
454
00:18:15,592 --> 00:18:17,526
after the whole Harvard thing, okay?
455
00:18:17,594 --> 00:18:20,062
I've been living here,
in my dead mom's apartment
456
00:18:20,130 --> 00:18:22,197
and I've been teaching
at this high school, okay?
457
00:18:22,653 --> 00:18:25,663
- I didn't tell you...
- Because... oh,
458
00:18:25,663 --> 00:18:27,125
because you're ashamed.
459
00:18:29,258 --> 00:18:30,941
Yeah, something like that.
460
00:18:32,389 --> 00:18:35,457
Um, look, Devin is one of my students,
461
00:18:35,526 --> 00:18:37,385
and he's a good kid, okay? He didn't...
462
00:18:37,816 --> 00:18:39,239
He didn't set out to hurt you.
463
00:18:39,418 --> 00:18:41,384
I mentioned you a few
times in my class, and I...
464
00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,253
[GASPS] Oh, oh, I get it.
465
00:18:43,321 --> 00:18:45,455
You talked about my cushy job at Stanford,
466
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:48,458
my many awards, my
numerous celebrity lovers,
467
00:18:48,527 --> 00:18:49,926
and Devin became obsessed with me.
468
00:18:49,995 --> 00:18:51,194
Yeah, well, he's not really obsessed...
469
00:18:51,263 --> 00:18:53,430
Devin wanted me to be his dad.
470
00:18:53,498 --> 00:18:54,698
Kind of sweet when you think about it.
471
00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:56,326
Yeah, I wouldn't say he's obsessed...
472
00:18:56,368 --> 00:19:00,239
Jack, you, you, Jack. You have nothing.
473
00:19:01,323 --> 00:19:04,090
But you live here, in the real world,
474
00:19:04,159 --> 00:19:05,525
with all... with real people.
475
00:19:05,594 --> 00:19:07,894
And maybe I need a bit
more of that in my life.
476
00:19:07,963 --> 00:19:10,497
Maybe that's why I believe
his cock-and-balls story
477
00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:12,535
too quickly. Oh, God.
478
00:19:12,917 --> 00:19:14,434
The trials and tribulations
479
00:19:14,503 --> 00:19:17,504
- of fame and fortune, eh?
- Oh, you...
480
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:20,040
Hey, uh, hello... I've gotta go, mate.
481
00:19:20,108 --> 00:19:21,541
My ride's here. I can't...
482
00:19:21,610 --> 00:19:24,010
I can't leave Oprah's private jet waiting.
483
00:19:24,079 --> 00:19:25,079
Again. [CHUCKLES]
484
00:19:25,113 --> 00:19:26,880
She was bloody livid last...
485
00:19:26,910 --> 00:19:28,212
Come on, come here.
486
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:30,184
Beautiful sod.
487
00:19:30,446 --> 00:19:33,087
Jack, you know,
488
00:19:34,091 --> 00:19:36,518
maybe the question
489
00:19:37,422 --> 00:19:39,126
really is the answer.
490
00:19:41,126 --> 00:19:43,214
- I'm sorry, how so?
- Cheerio.
491
00:19:44,663 --> 00:19:46,279
[GROANS] Hello, mate.
492
00:19:47,532 --> 00:19:48,838
Airport, please.
493
00:19:50,001 --> 00:19:52,969
?
494
00:19:53,038 --> 00:19:54,572
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
495
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:59,240
?
496
00:20:04,249 --> 00:20:05,715
So you're, uh,
497
00:20:05,784 --> 00:20:08,209
back in the good graces
of that phony loser.
498
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,069
Happy now?
499
00:20:10,435 --> 00:20:11,467
Don't care.
500
00:20:12,270 --> 00:20:13,270
Me neither.
501
00:20:15,006 --> 00:20:15,938
Peace.
502
00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:19,575
?
503
00:20:19,644 --> 00:20:22,196
[PHONE CHIMING AND BUZZING]
504
00:20:27,171 --> 00:20:29,886
- Miles.
- Jacky boy, it's me.
505
00:20:29,954 --> 00:20:31,087
Fancy this.
506
00:20:31,155 --> 00:20:33,723
You have inspired me yet again.
507
00:20:33,791 --> 00:20:36,392
That's great, Miles. Have fun now.
508
00:20:36,461 --> 00:20:38,060
W-well, hang on, hang on. Hang on.
509
00:20:38,129 --> 00:20:39,332
I'm leaving Stanford.
510
00:20:39,831 --> 00:20:42,815
And I'd like you to take over for me.
511
00:20:43,801 --> 00:20:46,636
I mean, with my recommendation
you would be a shoo-in.
512
00:20:46,704 --> 00:20:48,919
So, what do you reckon, mate?
513
00:20:49,507 --> 00:20:51,974
Fancy being the head of
Philosophy at Stanford?
514
00:20:52,043 --> 00:20:56,043
?
515
00:20:56,067 --> 00:20:58,664
Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
516
00:20:58,714 --> 00:21:03,264
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
36733
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
