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1
00:00:12,011 --> 00:00:15,932
♪ Love... ♪
2
00:00:16,015 --> 00:00:19,728
♪ Exciting and new ♪
3
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,563
♪ Come aboard ♪
4
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:27,569
♪ We're expecting you...♪
5
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:31,740
♪ And Love ♪
6
00:00:31,823 --> 00:00:35,994
♪ life's sweetest reward ♪
7
00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,537
♪ Let it flow ♪
8
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:44,127
♪ it floats back to you... ♪
9
00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:47,630
♪ The love Boat ♪
10
00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:52,177
♪ Soon will be makinganother run ♪
11
00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:55,597
♪ The Love Boat ♪
12
00:00:55,680 --> 00:01:00,268
♪ promises something foreveryone. ♪
13
00:01:00,351 --> 00:01:06,691
♪ Set a course for adventureYour mind on a new romance. ♪
14
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:12,322
♪ And love ♪
15
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:14,699
♪ won't hurt anymore ♪
16
00:01:16,242 --> 00:01:20,330
♪ It's an open smile ♪
17
00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:29,214
♪ on a friendly shore.Yes, love... ♪
18
00:01:29,297 --> 00:01:31,341
♪ Welcome aboard, it's love. ♪
19
00:01:55,323 --> 00:01:57,325
Thank you very much.
20
00:01:57,408 --> 00:01:58,368
Okay -- wait a minute,
wait a minute.
21
00:01:58,451 --> 00:01:59,494
I don't know.
22
00:01:59,577 --> 00:02:00,370
Maybe we're making a big mistake
going on this cruise.
23
00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:01,663
Oh, yes...
24
00:02:01,746 --> 00:02:04,207
who wants to spend ten days
lying in the sun getting a great
tan
25
00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:08,044
eating lots of wonderful food,
being waited onhand and foot?
26
00:02:08,127 --> 00:02:09,337
We do!
27
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:13,174
Hi, we're the Rix's.
28
00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:14,676
Welcome aboard.
29
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:16,052
You're on the Fiesta Deck...
30
00:02:16,135 --> 00:02:17,387
F one-thirty-nine.
31
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:20,723
Go down through the main doors,
down the companionway and then
out.
32
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:21,391
Thank you.
33
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,559
JULIE: Hi, kids.
34
00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:24,686
GRAHAM: I'm the kid,
she's in puberty.
35
00:02:24,769 --> 00:02:26,437
Isn't she a rat,
huh, huh?
36
00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:29,232
JULIE: Nice having you
with us again.
37
00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,400
Bye bye.
38
00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:32,235
Hello, welcome aboard.
39
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:33,236
KITTY: Hi, sweety.
40
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:36,239
If you're the official
badhammer on this tub
41
00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:38,616
you must know where
they keep hooks.
42
00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:41,202
That's through the Purser's
lobby and then go straight.
43
00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:42,495
Nothing closer?
44
00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:54,591
JUDY: I've got it.
45
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:55,216
That's what I love.
46
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,843
A truly independent woman.
47
00:02:56,926 --> 00:02:58,428
I'm not that independent.
48
00:02:58,511 --> 00:03:01,097
I just want you to save your
strength for the good stuff...
49
00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:03,182
Come on. You can get that.
50
00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:13,234
Dr. and Mrs. Carstairs.
51
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:14,068
I've got them.
52
00:03:14,152 --> 00:03:14,611
Hm-hm.
53
00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:16,446
The Ramirez family.
54
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:18,489
Si.
55
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:21,701
Mister....gorgeous.
56
00:03:23,369 --> 00:03:25,330
Come on gang, all aboard.
57
00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:25,997
Gorgeous...
58
00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:27,749
Mister...
59
00:03:27,832 --> 00:03:28,791
I don't see him.
60
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:31,085
Oh, I do.
61
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:32,462
Ah-ha.
62
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:36,633
Hi, I'm Mr. Right.
63
00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,426
That's what she thought the
minute she saw you.
64
00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:39,844
Jim Right.
65
00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:43,932
Well, I'm Yeoman Purser Smith
and this is our cruise director
Julie....
66
00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:45,224
Julie.
67
00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:46,643
Julie...
68
00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,645
Oh, hi...
[stammering]
69
00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:52,148
I'm Julie McCoy.
70
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,735
Or if you speak English,
Julie McCoy.
71
00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:00,990
Welcome aboard, Mr...
72
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,158
Right.
73
00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:03,034
Right...
74
00:04:03,117 --> 00:04:03,993
Wrong.
75
00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,370
No...
76
00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:06,537
You can't be the Mr. Right
77
00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:09,207
with the Life Begins At
Sixty Tours.
78
00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:10,416
Ah yes, that's me.
79
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:14,045
I was expecting
somebody sixty.
80
00:04:14,128 --> 00:04:15,213
[chuckles]
81
00:04:15,296 --> 00:04:16,756
Well, I'm thirty.
82
00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:21,678
Looks like my life is
just beginning.
83
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:24,222
Well, where's your
group, Mr. Right?
84
00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:25,682
Uh, uh... they'll be
along in a minute.
85
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,851
I think the gangplank
slowed 'em up a little bit...
86
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,520
You have time for a
cup of coffee?
87
00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,689
[Julie gasps] Well...
88
00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:34,524
I should finish.
89
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,405
Oh.
90
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:41,572
Would you mind checking
in the group?
91
00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:43,366
No, you kids go
right ahead.
92
00:04:43,449 --> 00:04:44,575
I'll handle everything.
93
00:04:44,659 --> 00:04:45,576
Thanks.
94
00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:46,536
Well....
95
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:51,833
OLD FOLKS:
[SINGING ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT]
96
00:04:54,502 --> 00:04:55,878
[laughter]
97
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:57,505
Hi, Jimmy. where are you going?
98
00:04:57,588 --> 00:04:58,214
Well...
99
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,092
SCOTSMAN: Hey, who's the cutie?
100
00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:03,886
This is your cruise director
Julie McCoy.
101
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:07,390
Ah...she looks like the real
McCoy to me!
102
00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:10,018
[laughter]
103
00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:13,229
And this is your assistant
purser, Mr. Burl Smith.
104
00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:15,231
But everybody
calls me Gopher.
105
00:05:15,314 --> 00:05:18,067
Listen, everybody, why don't we
try and find your cabins.
106
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,569
I know you all can use
a little rest.
107
00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:20,403
Rest nothin'.
108
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:21,779
Come on, Jimmy boy.
109
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:25,033
Let's check this tub out
and find the action.
110
00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:26,743
♪ Row, row, row, your boat ♪
111
00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,911
♪ gently down the stream ♪
112
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,705
♪ merrily merrily
merrily merrily ♪
113
00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:32,707
♪ Life is but a dream.♪
114
00:05:32,790 --> 00:05:35,126
[Old folks singing continues]
115
00:05:35,209 --> 00:05:36,377
I can dig it.
116
00:05:43,551 --> 00:05:44,385
ISAAC: Here you go,
Mrs. Larsin.
117
00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:45,470
One piña colada.
118
00:05:45,553 --> 00:05:46,804
Thank you.
119
00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:48,681
I could really get hooked
on these things.
120
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:50,266
Yeah, but you
gotta watch 'em.
121
00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:52,226
One is delicious.
122
00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:53,394
Two are dangerous
123
00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,439
and three will make you want to
go bowling with your head.
124
00:05:56,522 --> 00:05:57,690
[laughter]
125
00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:59,275
I'll have another one.
126
00:05:59,358 --> 00:06:00,443
I'm a terrific bowler...
127
00:06:00,526 --> 00:06:02,028
First strike comin' up.
128
00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:07,784
Oh....boy this beats
Chicago in the winter.
129
00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:10,745
Death Valley beats
Chicago in the winter.
130
00:06:10,828 --> 00:06:12,121
Maybe I'll get my
practice in.
131
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,790
Why not?
132
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:15,333
They've got everything else on
this cruise ship.
133
00:06:15,416 --> 00:06:17,627
Why not a marriage counsellor?
134
00:06:17,710 --> 00:06:19,962
That reminds me,
did you...
135
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:22,965
did you call Barney before
the ship left L.A.?
136
00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:28,012
Why do I want to call
my ex-husband?
137
00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,306
Oh, I don't know.
138
00:06:30,389 --> 00:06:32,100
I had hoped the two of you might
resolve your differences --
139
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,976
you know, dissipate some
of that hostility that came
140
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,228
out of the divorce
proceedings.
141
00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:37,480
I'm not hostile anymore.
142
00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:38,815
Terry...
143
00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:41,776
it's obvious you still
harbor deep feelings
144
00:06:41,859 --> 00:06:42,985
of resentment towards Barney.
145
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:46,948
I do not harbor deep feelings of
resentment towards Barney.
146
00:06:47,031 --> 00:06:49,200
I just hate his guts.
147
00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:50,159
You know sometimes
148
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:52,620
I feel all of your
anger towards Barney is
149
00:06:52,703 --> 00:06:53,955
affecting our marriage.
150
00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:55,540
I sometimes think you're
not over him yet.
151
00:06:55,623 --> 00:06:56,666
Over him?
152
00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:58,668
I'd like to drive a
truck over him.
153
00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:00,336
That's not a healthy attitude.
154
00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:01,504
[laughter]
155
00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:03,381
What do you know about
attitudes?
156
00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:05,299
You were our marriage
counsellor....
157
00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,968
And boy did you ever bomb out.
158
00:07:07,051 --> 00:07:08,219
I beg your pardon.
159
00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:10,513
I helped you make a
great deal of progress.
160
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:11,848
We got divorced.
161
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:13,015
I call that progress.
162
00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:14,350
I got you.
163
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:15,977
[laughter]
164
00:07:24,902 --> 00:07:26,070
Oh my God!
165
00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:27,238
What's wrong?
166
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:30,950
Terry?
167
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,498
What's wrong?
What is happening?
168
00:07:37,582 --> 00:07:39,375
Terry?
169
00:07:39,458 --> 00:07:40,209
Terry?
170
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:44,589
Will you....will you
talk to me here?
171
00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:46,799
Is this some weird religious
experience you're having?
172
00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:50,052
Barney's down there.
173
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,345
Do you think he saw me?
174
00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,347
I didn't hear anybody laugh.
175
00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:55,224
This is gonna ruin
our cruise!
176
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:55,766
Why?
177
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:57,393
I always liked Barney.
178
00:07:59,187 --> 00:07:59,604
Purser?
179
00:07:59,687 --> 00:08:00,563
GOPHER: Yes, ma'am.
180
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:01,147
Is there any way I can
get off this boat?
181
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:03,232
Ah, service that bad, huh?
182
00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,066
No, no, no, no, no.
183
00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:05,401
No my wife is just a
little upset.
184
00:08:05,484 --> 00:08:07,069
I'm a lot upset!!
185
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:11,407
Um...well, sir, you see the
Captain really needs me now.
186
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:13,910
He... he just goes all to pieces
when I'm not there to help him
187
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,537
with the steering and
all that ship stuff.
188
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:18,456
Have a nice day.
189
00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:20,374
Good... come over here.
190
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:21,042
Now listen...
191
00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:22,627
Come over...
192
00:08:22,710 --> 00:08:24,045
Now be mature.
193
00:08:24,128 --> 00:08:26,130
You can't avoid Barney
for the entire cruise.
194
00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:27,465
You wanna bet?
195
00:08:27,548 --> 00:08:29,634
Now listen to me...you're an
intelligent woman.
196
00:08:29,717 --> 00:08:30,760
He's an intelligent man.
197
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,346
This is the perfect time to
resolve your differences.
198
00:08:33,429 --> 00:08:36,641
The important thing is
to act like an adult.
199
00:08:36,724 --> 00:08:38,434
Right?
200
00:08:38,517 --> 00:08:39,644
TYou're right.
201
00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:42,271
I'll act like an adult.
202
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,439
[chuckles]
203
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:56,285
Be a good sport and bring
Grandma a boilermaker.
204
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,163
I'm sorry, Miss, but are you
twenty-one years old?
205
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,499
Keep that up and you'll
be able to retire
206
00:09:01,582 --> 00:09:03,292
on your tips this voyage.
207
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,752
Thank you.
208
00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:09,632
I'm Kitty Piekrell....
209
00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,968
And what are you girls
playing here, hm?
210
00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:13,636
Crazy eights.
211
00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:16,097
Oh, gimme them cards...
212
00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:40,121
Get over here, pumpkin.
213
00:09:40,204 --> 00:09:42,206
Kitty: I want you to
meet my two pals.
214
00:09:43,457 --> 00:09:48,879
This handsome twerp is Graham
Piekrell, my grandson.
215
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:52,883
And these are my new
poker buddies.
216
00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:54,552
Kitty: Oh, do you know what...
217
00:09:54,635 --> 00:09:56,512
I don't know your names.
218
00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:59,181
Kelly Rixie and this
is my sister Polly.
219
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:00,516
Well, I gotta go.
220
00:10:00,599 --> 00:10:02,852
What in the world for, honey?
221
00:10:05,646 --> 00:10:08,524
You will never get the
information out of me.
222
00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:09,233
Never!
223
00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:10,359
Do you hear?
224
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,569
You Schweinhund.....
225
00:10:11,652 --> 00:10:14,113
I've been stabbed twelve
times....
226
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,950
I've never... help.
227
00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:22,663
He's weird.
228
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:24,165
Cute, but weird.
229
00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:27,209
I don't know where he
gets it from.
230
00:10:31,964 --> 00:10:35,593
[applause]
Oh, God!
Oh!
231
00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:36,927
You're good.
232
00:10:37,011 --> 00:10:38,888
Well, he's a regular
William Tell.
233
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:40,431
I also juggle, figure skate
234
00:10:40,514 --> 00:10:42,391
and I once pitched a no-hitter
for the Yankees.
235
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:43,267
Really?
236
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:44,894
Well, I lied about
the figure skating.
237
00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:46,520
Oh....
238
00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,856
Well, I tried skeet shooting
once, I couldn't hit a thing.
239
00:10:48,939 --> 00:10:53,527
Yeah, well, I developed a
technique...it always works....
240
00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:56,364
I keep my right elbow close to
my side, not too close.
241
00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:58,741
Left arm is firm, not too firm.
242
00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:00,910
Take a deep breath,
line up the shot
243
00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:02,036
and as I pull the trigger...
244
00:11:02,119 --> 00:11:03,454
[fires shot]
245
00:11:03,537 --> 00:11:05,539
I think of my ex-wife.
246
00:11:05,623 --> 00:11:07,833
Oh, Barney...
247
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:09,752
I know sometimes when people
get divorced
248
00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:11,253
they have unhappy memories.
249
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:14,090
I have happier memories of an
ingrown toenail.
250
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:17,134
It doesn't always have to be
like that, Barney, if you and I
got married.
251
00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:20,096
Judy, there are two things I
vowed I would never get into
again.
252
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,932
Edsel stock and marriage.
253
00:11:23,015 --> 00:11:24,183
[fires shot]
254
00:11:25,851 --> 00:11:27,103
You don't know what
she was like.
255
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:29,313
I mean, she treated
me like slime.
256
00:11:29,397 --> 00:11:30,648
She treated my friends worse.
257
00:11:30,731 --> 00:11:32,066
Worse than slime?
258
00:11:32,149 --> 00:11:33,067
Yeah, take Harry.
259
00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:34,068
The guy that works for the
sanitation department?
260
00:11:34,151 --> 00:11:35,945
Yes, she wouldn't let
him come in the house.
261
00:11:36,028 --> 00:11:36,821
I mean she let him come in
262
00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:38,656
but she wouldn't let him
touch anything.
263
00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:40,116
Do you know what it's like to
play poker with a guy who's...
264
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,576
standing up and wearing
gloves...
265
00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:44,412
[fires shot]
266
00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:46,122
Hated my job...
267
00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:47,581
Thought life insurance was
morbid.
268
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:48,624
Well, Barney.
269
00:11:48,707 --> 00:11:50,501
Well, it's only morbid when
you're collecting.
270
00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:53,295
The more I think about it, the
more steamed up I get.....
271
00:11:56,215 --> 00:11:58,259
My God, there's Terry.
[cocks gun]
272
00:11:58,342 --> 00:11:59,969
Barney, it isn't worth it.
273
00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:03,639
I bet I could've winged her.
274
00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:04,765
Barney...
275
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:05,891
Yeah.
276
00:12:10,187 --> 00:12:11,480
Now listen you...
277
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:12,690
Huh?
278
00:12:12,773 --> 00:12:15,985
I know breakfast is not the most
romantic meal of the day,
279
00:12:16,068 --> 00:12:19,280
but if I can't get to see you
over martinis, at least I saw
280
00:12:19,363 --> 00:12:20,698
you over Rice Krispies.
281
00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:22,825
I thought it was very romantic
282
00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:24,827
and I got to learn all these
little intimate
283
00:12:24,910 --> 00:12:26,620
details about you.
284
00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:29,165
You like strawberries on your
cereal...
285
00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:30,708
two sugars in your coffee....
286
00:12:30,791 --> 00:12:31,500
[laughter]
287
00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:33,002
You're not grumpy
in the morning.
288
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,045
How can anybody be
grumpy around you?
289
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:37,339
[chanting]
290
00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,216
Oh, come on, Jimmy,
you call that jogging?
291
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,676
That's not even a brisk walk.
292
00:12:40,759 --> 00:12:41,844
Come on.
293
00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:43,262
You want to see grumpy?
294
00:13:06,994 --> 00:13:09,538
Now the Golden Gate Bridge is
the longest suspension bridge
295
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:10,206
in the world.
296
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:11,207
GRAHAM: Sorry.
297
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:13,042
But the Verrazano, Narrowest
Bridge in New York
298
00:13:13,125 --> 00:13:14,627
outspans it by sixty feet.
299
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:17,213
Except the Verrazano Narrowest
Bridge in New York
300
00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:19,924
which outspans it by sixty feet.
301
00:13:20,007 --> 00:13:22,384
Such stimulating conversation.
302
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:24,678
You have me on the edge
of my seat.
303
00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:26,555
[chuckles]
304
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,724
By the way, you two are a very
interesting combination.
305
00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:30,059
A grandmother
from England
306
00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:31,602
and a grandson
from Brooklyn.
307
00:13:31,685 --> 00:13:35,856
Well, my daughter couldn't
resist a man in uniform.
308
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:40,027
Ahhh...he was an American
soldier stationed in Britain?
309
00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:43,072
No, a bus driver in Brooklyn.
310
00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:44,740
[laughter]
311
00:13:44,823 --> 00:13:47,326
GRAHAM: Actually, there are many
number of bridges longer than
312
00:13:47,409 --> 00:13:49,787
the Golden Gate, but they're not
suspension bridges.
313
00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:51,914
Advanced for his years,
isn't he?
314
00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:53,541
He's great at being adult
315
00:13:53,624 --> 00:13:56,293
but he knows nothing
about being twelve.
316
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:58,712
Well, I wouldn't
worry about it.
317
00:13:58,796 --> 00:13:59,880
KELLY: Hello, Mrs. Piekrell.
318
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:01,257
KITTY: Oh, hello.
319
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:01,966
KELLY: Hi, Doc.
320
00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:04,593
DOC: Hi.
321
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,136
The claw...
322
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:09,431
Egor, the curse of my
royal blood
323
00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:12,226
it happens only around
beautiful women.
324
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:15,896
Mrs. Piekrell...
325
00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,106
start worrying.
326
00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:21,694
I guess he just
doesn't like me.
327
00:14:23,153 --> 00:14:26,282
But he called you a beautiful
woman, didn't he?
328
00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:28,534
Come to think of it, he did.
329
00:14:34,081 --> 00:14:38,168
Ah...what are you
doing on my ship?
330
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:40,045
I'm taking a
friend on a cruise.
331
00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:41,463
What are you doing
on my ship?
332
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:44,466
Having a very enjoyable trip
with my second husband
333
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:47,094
a man by the way, who makes you
look like chopped liver.
334
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,055
You ought to meet
my girlfriend.
335
00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:52,349
She's young and attractive.
336
00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:53,434
I saw her.
337
00:14:53,517 --> 00:14:55,561
How many years before she
graduates high school?
338
00:14:57,229 --> 00:14:58,814
She has a masters in
anthropology.
339
00:14:58,897 --> 00:14:59,940
She's intelligent.
340
00:15:00,024 --> 00:15:00,733
And she's with you?
341
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,487
Couldn't you have
taken the plane?
342
00:15:05,571 --> 00:15:08,115
Why couldn't you
have used your broom?
343
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:11,327
If you had any character, you'd
get off this ship.
344
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:12,786
What do you want me to do,
jump overboard?
345
00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:13,579
Yeah.
346
00:15:13,662 --> 00:15:16,498
I'll throw you a rope...
both ends.
347
00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:17,499
Ugh!
348
00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:22,504
Barney, you're not gonna cause
any trouble, are you?
349
00:15:23,922 --> 00:15:24,965
What do you mean?
350
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,343
Well, when Rod couldn't
straighten out the problems
351
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:29,970
you and I were having
and I ended up
352
00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:32,931
with him, you sort of threatened
to rearrange his face.
353
00:15:34,516 --> 00:15:36,185
Me?
354
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:37,645
I don't go in for physical
violence.
355
00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,398
If I hit him at all it will
be very lightly.
356
00:15:46,945 --> 00:15:47,529
Julie?
357
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:48,989
Yes?
358
00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:49,865
Can I talk to you
woman to woman?
359
00:15:49,948 --> 00:15:51,867
Absolutely.
360
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:54,328
Well, I can't really talk to my
father about something like this
361
00:15:54,411 --> 00:15:55,162
so...
362
00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,705
Okay. Shoot.
363
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,874
You went through
puberty, right?
364
00:15:58,957 --> 00:16:02,670
Yes, there's some people I know
who think I'm still in it, but
yes...
365
00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:06,548
And when it was over...did you
know how to handle boys?
366
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:08,175
That's a tough question
367
00:16:08,258 --> 00:16:10,386
because there're some boys that
you just sort of...
368
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:13,055
instinctively know how to
handle. Right?
369
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:16,016
And there are some boys that
you learn how to handle...
370
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,602
and other boys you never
figure out.
371
00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:20,729
Oh.
372
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:23,565
That wasn't much
help, was it?
373
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:27,444
Well, what do you do with
someone who's the most grownup
374
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:29,905
person in the world one minute
and the next minute he's acting
375
00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:31,699
like a six-year-old?
376
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,659
Graham, huh?
377
00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:34,618
Yeah.
378
00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,620
Can't get him into a normal
conversation.
379
00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,080
Well, there was one thing I
learned about men.
380
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:41,792
Regardless of their age, and
that is that they have one
favorite topic...
381
00:16:41,875 --> 00:16:43,252
themselves.
382
00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:46,880
So, the next chance you get, ask
him a couple of questions about
himself.
383
00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,757
Well, like what kind of
questions?
384
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,259
You know, what kind of
car does he drive?
385
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,427
What's he do for a living?
386
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:53,262
Julie, he's only twelve.
387
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,765
Well, you know what I mean.
388
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,100
You really think it'll work?
389
00:16:58,183 --> 00:17:00,102
It usually does.
390
00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:01,770
Okay. I'll try.
391
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:04,481
Well, you see there's this very
attractive girl on board.
392
00:17:04,565 --> 00:17:06,442
Yeah?
Which one...
393
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:08,277
Oh, you mean that
little girl...
394
00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,111
Kelly.
395
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,571
Yeah. Right.
396
00:17:10,654 --> 00:17:13,157
Every time I see her, I feel
like my brains fell out.
397
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:14,533
I never know what to say.
398
00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:17,578
Hey, that's easy, flatter her.
399
00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:21,915
There isn't a woman in the world
who doesn't like to hear how
nice she looks.
400
00:17:21,999 --> 00:17:24,460
You tell her how nice she looks.
401
00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:25,586
Is that all I have to do?
402
00:17:25,669 --> 00:17:27,129
DOC: Take it from me.
403
00:17:27,212 --> 00:17:28,464
See, I've been very successful
with women.
404
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,174
I've been married four times.
405
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,354
TERRY: Isn't this exciting?
406
00:17:44,438 --> 00:17:46,774
Imagine sitting at the
Captain's table.
407
00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:48,317
Oh, this is going
to be such fun.
408
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,777
Providing we don't
run into Barney.
409
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,779
Oh, I don't think we have to
worry about that.
410
00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:54,865
They don't serve fries and
Quarter Pounders here...
411
00:18:00,954 --> 00:18:02,956
Is there another
Captain's table?
412
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:04,374
I wish there were.
413
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:07,336
Of course you'll do the
gentlemanly thing and sit
somewhere else.
414
00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:09,129
Of course you'll do the polite
thing and take a hike.
415
00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:10,756
Hello, Barney...
416
00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:14,009
Long time no see.
417
00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:14,968
Hi, Rod.
418
00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:17,262
How's the fake marriage
counsellor business.
419
00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:19,306
Barney, charming as ever.
420
00:18:19,389 --> 00:18:20,849
Oh, we've not been introduced.
421
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,142
I'm Rod Larsin, Terry's husband.
422
00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:22,851
Judy Watson.
423
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:23,727
This is my wife Terry.
424
00:18:23,811 --> 00:18:24,770
How do you do?
425
00:18:24,853 --> 00:18:25,896
JUDY: I believe you know Barney.
426
00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:27,564
TERRY: Oh, do I know Barney.
427
00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:28,065
Good evening.
428
00:18:28,148 --> 00:18:29,399
I'm Captain Stubing.
429
00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:30,359
TERRY: Hello.
430
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:31,401
Well, it's nice to have you
on the ship again
431
00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:32,778
Mr. and Mrs. Green.
432
00:18:32,861 --> 00:18:33,529
ROD: Good evening,
we're the Larsins.
433
00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:34,196
CAPTAIN: Aha....
434
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:34,655
TERRY: Hello.
435
00:18:34,738 --> 00:18:35,447
CAPTAIN: Hello.
436
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:36,740
And Judy Watson...
Barney Mason.
437
00:18:36,824 --> 00:18:37,991
TERRY: And they were
just leaving.
438
00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:39,368
CAPTAIN: Was it something
I said?
439
00:18:39,451 --> 00:18:40,369
That's just Mrs. Larsin's
440
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:41,411
feeble attempt at humor.
441
00:18:41,495 --> 00:18:43,038
Barney....
442
00:18:43,121 --> 00:18:46,083
Oh, please have a seat.
443
00:18:46,166 --> 00:18:47,209
Have two.
444
00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:49,545
[laughter]
445
00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:51,004
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
446
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:52,923
Boy, girl, boy, girl.
447
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:56,218
An ancient nautical tradition...
448
00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:57,803
Captain's orders...
449
00:19:02,307 --> 00:19:03,392
That's nice.
450
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:05,561
Yes...
451
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:07,604
Good, good.
[heavy sigh]
452
00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:11,108
Now...here we are
all together.
453
00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:13,235
Terry?
454
00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:14,194
Mhm?
455
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:16,363
I must tell you how
great the house is.
456
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:17,447
What house?
457
00:19:17,531 --> 00:19:18,740
I live with Barney.
458
00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,075
Oh, our house.
459
00:19:20,158 --> 00:19:21,869
I mean, that house.
460
00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:23,078
You have such super taste.
461
00:19:23,161 --> 00:19:26,373
I really hate to change anything
especially in the dining room.
462
00:19:26,456 --> 00:19:29,668
All that wonderful marble and
chrome and leather.
463
00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:31,378
What really makes that
room for me
464
00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:33,297
is the black and
white tiled floor.
465
00:19:33,380 --> 00:19:35,215
Yes, it did.
466
00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:36,508
It did?
467
00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:40,929
Well, it started to buckle, so
Barney replaced it with
Astroturf.
468
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:44,725
Astroturf in my dining room?
469
00:19:44,808 --> 00:19:46,935
It's very practical.
470
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:49,605
You can hose it down.
471
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:51,440
And it's our dining room.
472
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:52,691
He's right you know.
473
00:19:52,774 --> 00:19:54,026
Who asked you?
474
00:19:56,111 --> 00:19:59,615
Well... how are you all enjoying
the cruise?
475
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:00,908
Swell.
476
00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:01,950
Delightful.
477
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:03,243
Terrific.
478
00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,453
Astroturf.
479
00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:06,580
CAPTAIN: Good...good....
480
00:20:06,663 --> 00:20:10,459
Now we'll begin with two
bottles of Bodicio, please.
481
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:13,837
Well, I hope that you're all
taking advantage of our
wonderful facilities.
482
00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:15,631
There's something for
everybody on board.
483
00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:16,924
Is there a guillotine?
484
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,095
Oh, Judy, have you ever been on
a cruise before?
485
00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:23,597
No, I love it.
486
00:20:24,723 --> 00:20:26,642
We never went
on a cruise.
487
00:20:26,725 --> 00:20:27,768
What are you complaining about.
488
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:29,645
We're on one now.
489
00:20:29,728 --> 00:20:31,188
What are you eating, dear?
490
00:20:31,271 --> 00:20:34,107
Oh, I don't know, somebody's
made me lose my appetite.
491
00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:36,151
I know the feeling.
492
00:20:36,234 --> 00:20:38,820
You two are ruining my evening.
493
00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:40,113
I know the feeling.
494
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,742
Ladies and gentlemen...
[taps glass]
495
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:46,036
May I make a
suggestion?
496
00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:51,667
Let's pretend this is the First
World War and it's Christmas.
497
00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:53,794
Poor guy's been at sea too long.
498
00:20:53,877 --> 00:20:57,172
Now you two are the Huns, you
are the doughboys
499
00:20:57,255 --> 00:21:01,510
and for this holiday
you lay down your arms
500
00:21:01,593 --> 00:21:03,345
just like they did.
501
00:21:03,428 --> 00:21:04,846
That's a good suggestion.
502
00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:07,349
Well, I'm willing.
503
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:09,017
CAPTAIN: There will be no
shooting at each other.
504
00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:12,854
No secret attacks,
no dropping bombs.
505
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,231
How 'bout lobbing a
little grenade?
506
00:21:14,314 --> 00:21:15,440
Terry.
507
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:20,237
I'm willing,
if you're willing.
508
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,989
[mutters]
509
00:21:22,072 --> 00:21:23,991
Well, I'm glad that's settled.
510
00:21:24,074 --> 00:21:25,701
Well, what are you two doing
after dinner?
511
00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:27,828
Maybe we all can do
something together.
512
00:21:27,911 --> 00:21:29,705
Oh, I don't know.
513
00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:32,165
Maybe we'll go dancing
or to the casino.
514
00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:35,002
Maybe we'll just hang
around the trench
515
00:21:35,085 --> 00:21:37,212
and swap war stories
with the rest of the Huns.
516
00:21:37,295 --> 00:21:39,172
[laughter]
517
00:21:41,299 --> 00:21:45,971
Dear Tony, we would be
e-ternally grateful
518
00:21:46,054 --> 00:21:49,391
if you would join us for an
evening of nightclubbing?
519
00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:50,684
Who's that?
520
00:21:50,767 --> 00:21:52,602
Quit pestering me.....
521
00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:54,229
POLLY: Eight thirty tonight...
522
00:21:54,312 --> 00:21:58,108
We will be the one with the
carnation in our nostril.
523
00:21:58,191 --> 00:22:00,402
[laughter]
524
00:22:00,485 --> 00:22:03,363
Love...
The Claw, alias
525
00:22:03,447 --> 00:22:05,073
Graham D. Piekerell...
526
00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:05,782
I...
527
00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:06,700
I...
528
00:22:06,783 --> 00:22:09,077
The second, you dope....
529
00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:10,245
Damn!
530
00:22:10,328 --> 00:22:12,039
I'm gonna tell that you swore.
531
00:22:12,122 --> 00:22:13,582
I've heard you say
worse than that.
532
00:22:13,665 --> 00:22:15,417
Not me, I'm only ten.
533
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:16,877
Well, la di da da.
534
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:18,545
POLLY: Can I ask you a question?
535
00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:19,588
What?
536
00:22:19,671 --> 00:22:22,591
Can I drop a water bomb on
Graham when he gets here?
537
00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:26,762
GRAHAM: Grandma!
538
00:22:26,845 --> 00:22:28,972
Grandma, look...
539
00:22:29,056 --> 00:22:32,225
Why, honey, that's a pimple.
540
00:22:32,309 --> 00:22:33,769
A pimple?
541
00:22:33,852 --> 00:22:34,895
A pimple!
542
00:22:34,978 --> 00:22:36,104
Now?!
543
00:22:36,188 --> 00:22:38,315
Well, you have to
get one sooner or later.
544
00:22:38,398 --> 00:22:41,818
Sooner okay, later okay,
but tonight?
545
00:22:41,902 --> 00:22:44,154
Honey, you look fine.
546
00:22:44,237 --> 00:22:46,907
That old pimple
looks like a freckle.
547
00:22:46,990 --> 00:22:48,992
You're the only one
that'll notice it.
548
00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:51,244
Why did I write
that stupid note.
549
00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:52,788
I wish I was in prison.
550
00:22:52,871 --> 00:22:55,290
Clyde, it's time for
you to shape up.
551
00:22:55,373 --> 00:22:56,875
Now come on.
552
00:22:56,958 --> 00:23:01,171
Put your coat on
and shove off.
553
00:23:01,254 --> 00:23:02,506
I'll go. I'll go.
554
00:23:02,589 --> 00:23:03,632
I'll go get drunk.
555
00:23:03,715 --> 00:23:05,050
You'll never see me again.
556
00:23:05,133 --> 00:23:06,802
I'll wash up on the
Mexican coast someday.
557
00:23:11,389 --> 00:23:12,766
I, uh..
558
00:23:12,849 --> 00:23:15,352
I thought I'd better spare you
the water bomb Polly was gonna
drop on you.
559
00:23:35,914 --> 00:23:37,124
Table for two?
560
00:23:37,207 --> 00:23:37,999
Yes.
561
00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:39,543
Right this way...
562
00:23:48,426 --> 00:23:49,302
Thank you.
563
00:23:49,386 --> 00:23:50,220
There you go....
564
00:23:50,887 --> 00:23:51,972
[clears throat]
565
00:23:55,475 --> 00:23:58,520
Why, thank you, sir.
566
00:23:58,603 --> 00:24:03,191
You know this is gonna come in
handy if I ever catch a cold.
567
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:04,860
GRAHAM: Well, the dollar's
here someplace.
568
00:24:04,943 --> 00:24:06,027
Hey, well, don't worry
about it, champ.
569
00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:06,695
Don't worry about it.
570
00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:09,030
I think that moment slid by.
571
00:24:09,114 --> 00:24:10,115
Enjoy your table.
572
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:31,052
What school do
you go to?
573
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:32,262
Hawthorne.
574
00:24:33,805 --> 00:24:35,682
You look very nice tonight.
575
00:24:35,765 --> 00:24:36,850
Thank you...
576
00:24:44,316 --> 00:24:47,277
Um, do you like sports?
577
00:24:48,653 --> 00:24:51,740
Yes...
578
00:24:51,823 --> 00:24:53,241
You look very nice tonight.
579
00:24:54,492 --> 00:24:56,161
Thank you...
580
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:03,752
What's your favorite
subject in school?
581
00:25:05,837 --> 00:25:07,130
Public speaking...
582
00:25:11,509 --> 00:25:12,969
You look very nice tonight.
583
00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:15,805
Thank you.
584
00:25:26,858 --> 00:25:28,235
GRAHAM: Hey, I'm sorry. Really.
585
00:25:29,194 --> 00:25:30,487
Yeah, well, that's
cool, man.
586
00:25:30,570 --> 00:25:31,738
That's cool.
587
00:25:31,821 --> 00:25:34,449
Listen, it's a lucky thing I
saved that Kleenex you gave me.
588
00:25:34,532 --> 00:25:36,785
Well, why don't you tell him how
nice he looks tonight?
589
00:25:41,373 --> 00:25:45,835
Oh, poor kids, they are not
getting along at all.
590
00:25:45,919 --> 00:25:47,420
What are you
so mad about?
591
00:25:47,504 --> 00:25:49,089
All I said was you look very
nice tonight.
592
00:25:49,172 --> 00:25:50,173
That's all you said.
593
00:25:50,257 --> 00:25:52,634
Doesn't anything interesting
ever happen in school?
594
00:25:52,717 --> 00:25:54,094
GRAHAM: Yeah.
595
00:25:54,177 --> 00:25:57,097
There's this girl in my class,
and one day somebody barfed in
her galoshes.
596
00:25:57,180 --> 00:25:59,724
Oh...gross.
597
00:25:59,808 --> 00:26:02,435
You'd better go back to...you
look very nice tonight.
598
00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:03,520
Oh yeah!
599
00:26:03,603 --> 00:26:06,815
Well, to tell you the truth, you
don't look so great.
600
00:26:06,898 --> 00:26:09,526
And that black gook on your eyes
is an embarrassing mess.
601
00:26:09,609 --> 00:26:10,652
Oh yeah!
602
00:26:10,735 --> 00:26:13,238
Well, it's better than having a
big zit on your lip.
603
00:26:13,321 --> 00:26:14,656
Check, please.
604
00:26:14,739 --> 00:26:16,533
And don't forget to leave the
waiter some Kleenex!
605
00:26:24,082 --> 00:26:25,625
What happened?
606
00:26:25,709 --> 00:26:26,835
He hates me.
607
00:26:34,426 --> 00:26:36,177
[sobbing]
608
00:26:44,394 --> 00:26:45,520
I'm sorry I'm so late.
609
00:26:45,603 --> 00:26:47,188
It's the only
time I can get free.
610
00:26:47,272 --> 00:26:48,440
Well, that's okay.
611
00:26:48,523 --> 00:26:51,526
I just want you to realize that
I don't usually go to a guy's
612
00:26:51,609 --> 00:26:55,363
cabin at two o'clock in the
morning...not on the first date.
613
00:26:55,447 --> 00:26:56,698
I know....
614
00:26:56,781 --> 00:26:58,658
But Julie, when else are
we gonna find time
615
00:26:58,742 --> 00:27:00,660
to be alone and a
place to be alone?
616
00:27:02,912 --> 00:27:05,123
I want to hold you
in my arms and kiss you.
617
00:27:09,169 --> 00:27:10,837
MAN: Deal the cards, Mama.
618
00:27:18,428 --> 00:27:19,596
Why in my cabin?
619
00:27:19,679 --> 00:27:22,640
Well, see we were gonna play at
Harry's, but you know how it is.
620
00:27:22,724 --> 00:27:25,352
Harry is entertaining.
621
00:27:25,435 --> 00:27:26,895
[laughter]
622
00:27:26,978 --> 00:27:29,022
Come on, Jim laddie,
take a hand.
623
00:27:29,105 --> 00:27:30,023
Well, ante up.
624
00:27:30,106 --> 00:27:33,693
Well, you know what they
say...lucky in cards...
625
00:27:48,666 --> 00:27:51,211
ROD: I gotta tell you, I never
thought this cruise would last
626
00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:54,756
three hours let alone
three days.
627
00:27:54,839 --> 00:27:58,968
I guess Barney's a nicer person
than I remembered, I guess.
628
00:27:59,052 --> 00:28:00,970
Terry, darling,
come on.
629
00:28:01,054 --> 00:28:02,097
We're supposed to meet
Judy and Barney
630
00:28:02,180 --> 00:28:03,264
in the bar in
five minutes.
631
00:28:03,348 --> 00:28:04,224
I'll be right there.
632
00:28:04,307 --> 00:28:05,725
I just...[laughter]
633
00:28:05,809 --> 00:28:07,769
I can't put this book down.
634
00:28:07,852 --> 00:28:08,561
What are you reading?
635
00:28:08,645 --> 00:28:10,438
Oh you know that
new best seller...
636
00:28:10,522 --> 00:28:12,440
Executive...
637
00:28:12,524 --> 00:28:14,025
trash.
638
00:28:14,109 --> 00:28:15,276
I thought you'd
finished that.
639
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:18,279
I did, now I'm going back to
read the parts that have the
story.
640
00:28:18,363 --> 00:28:20,657
Darling, please come on,
we're late.
641
00:28:20,740 --> 00:28:21,950
You go ahead.
642
00:28:22,033 --> 00:28:22,867
I'll just be a minute.
643
00:28:22,951 --> 00:28:24,536
There are only about
eleven clean pages.
644
00:28:25,870 --> 00:28:29,374
♪ ♪
645
00:28:35,088 --> 00:28:36,548
Oh!
[speaking under breath]
646
00:28:40,218 --> 00:28:41,511
JUDY: I'll have a whiskey sour.
647
00:28:41,594 --> 00:28:41,970
ISAAC: Fine.
648
00:28:42,053 --> 00:28:43,179
And you, sir?
649
00:28:43,263 --> 00:28:46,349
Uh...yeah...a whiskey sour.
650
00:28:46,433 --> 00:28:47,142
Fine.
651
00:28:47,225 --> 00:28:48,768
And you, sir?
652
00:28:48,852 --> 00:28:49,436
That sounds good.
653
00:28:49,519 --> 00:28:50,437
Whiskey sour.
654
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,647
I'd better write that down, so I
don't forget it.
655
00:28:54,023 --> 00:28:55,150
Where's Terry?
656
00:28:55,233 --> 00:28:57,527
Oh, Terry is always late.
657
00:28:57,610 --> 00:29:00,655
You got to light a stick of
dynamite under her to get her
moving.
658
00:29:00,738 --> 00:29:02,782
JULIE [V.O.]: Good afternoon,ladies and gentlemen...
659
00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:05,660
just a reminder -- jackpotbingo will begin in the
660
00:29:05,743 --> 00:29:08,121
Acapulco Lounge in ten minutes.
661
00:29:08,204 --> 00:29:10,957
The pot is now onethousand dollars.
662
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,835
[gasps] Come on let's go.
663
00:29:13,918 --> 00:29:15,044
I feel lucky.
664
00:29:15,128 --> 00:29:16,754
Besides I could use a
thousand dollars.
665
00:29:18,756 --> 00:29:21,593
I hate to tell you this, Judy,
but I'm feeling very lucky too,
666
00:29:21,676 --> 00:29:24,179
and I am probably the best bingo
player of all the
667
00:29:24,262 --> 00:29:25,972
left-handed marriage
counselors I know.
668
00:29:26,055 --> 00:29:29,017
ISAAC: Ah, now...who
gets the whiskey sour?
669
00:29:29,100 --> 00:29:30,185
Don't tell me.
670
00:29:30,268 --> 00:29:32,312
Don't tell me!
671
00:29:32,395 --> 00:29:33,813
How 'bout you, Barney?
Want to play a little bingo?
672
00:29:33,897 --> 00:29:35,190
No.
673
00:29:35,273 --> 00:29:38,693
My doctor warned me against
skydiving and bingo.
674
00:29:38,776 --> 00:29:39,944
Too much excitement.
675
00:29:40,945 --> 00:29:42,280
Where is Terry.
676
00:29:42,363 --> 00:29:44,532
Did she go back to Chicago
for her dress?
677
00:29:44,616 --> 00:29:46,534
Listen, why don't you two go
play bingo
678
00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:48,953
and I'll wait for Terry and you
can meet us here later.
679
00:29:49,037 --> 00:29:50,038
Thanks, pal.
680
00:29:50,121 --> 00:29:52,207
ROD: If you're looking for us,
we'll be easy to spot.
681
00:29:52,290 --> 00:29:53,875
We'll be the couple
with all the money.
682
00:29:53,958 --> 00:29:54,876
Oh yeah.
683
00:29:54,959 --> 00:29:55,710
Bye, Barney.
684
00:29:55,793 --> 00:29:56,711
Bye, honey.
685
00:29:59,088 --> 00:29:59,881
[knocks on door]
686
00:29:59,964 --> 00:30:00,882
Who is it?
687
00:30:00,965 --> 00:30:02,217
BARNEY: Peter Rabbit.
688
00:30:02,300 --> 00:30:03,593
[chuckles]
Come in, Barney.
689
00:30:05,595 --> 00:30:06,888
You haven't changed.
690
00:30:06,971 --> 00:30:07,931
Right on time.
691
00:30:08,014 --> 00:30:08,973
Thirty minutes late.
692
00:30:09,057 --> 00:30:10,892
I'm sorry...
693
00:30:10,975 --> 00:30:12,560
I don't know, sometimes
I think my head's
694
00:30:12,644 --> 00:30:15,021
in a different time zone from
the rest of the world.
695
00:30:21,027 --> 00:30:24,572
Ahhh....it was worth the wait.
696
00:30:24,656 --> 00:30:25,740
You look terrific.
697
00:30:25,823 --> 00:30:27,659
You always had
great taste.
698
00:30:29,285 --> 00:30:31,955
Is that the
same jacket?
699
00:30:32,038 --> 00:30:34,791
Oh yeah...yeah, it's
the one you gave me, our...
700
00:30:34,874 --> 00:30:37,961
fifth Christmas together...
and I still love it.
701
00:30:38,044 --> 00:30:39,629
I still hate it.
702
00:30:39,712 --> 00:30:40,380
Oh yeah?
703
00:30:40,463 --> 00:30:41,256
Uh-huh.
704
00:30:41,339 --> 00:30:42,215
Why'd you give it to me?
705
00:30:42,298 --> 00:30:44,259
I don't know, it looked
good on the dummy.
706
00:30:44,342 --> 00:30:45,260
[laughter]
707
00:30:45,343 --> 00:30:46,594
I thought it looked
good on me.
708
00:30:46,678 --> 00:30:50,056
Oh, come on now Barney,
you're no dummy.
709
00:30:50,139 --> 00:30:52,600
As a matter of fact,
you're a terrific guy.
710
00:30:59,983 --> 00:31:01,442
Want to go?
711
00:31:01,526 --> 00:31:02,485
Yes...
712
00:31:02,569 --> 00:31:05,738
Ah oh...could you just
help me with my zipper.
713
00:31:05,822 --> 00:31:07,115
Sure...
714
00:31:09,867 --> 00:31:11,703
You're wearing
Shalimar, aren't ya?
715
00:31:11,786 --> 00:31:14,122
Yes.
716
00:31:14,205 --> 00:31:15,915
You were wearing that the
night I met you, remember?
717
00:31:15,999 --> 00:31:17,125
Hm-hm...
718
00:31:17,208 --> 00:31:20,295
Shalimar, an evening in Paris
and Chanel number five....
719
00:31:20,378 --> 00:31:21,963
I worked in a drugstore.
[nervous laughter]
720
00:31:23,506 --> 00:31:25,550
You always had the
softest hair.
721
00:31:28,219 --> 00:31:29,304
Barney I...
722
00:31:29,387 --> 00:31:31,097
I think that...
we'd better...
723
00:31:31,180 --> 00:31:32,682
Better what?
724
00:31:32,765 --> 00:31:35,018
Go.
725
00:31:35,101 --> 00:31:36,603
Oh yeah.
726
00:31:41,733 --> 00:31:42,817
Now is your Mr.
727
00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:44,736
Right gonna stand
you up again?
728
00:31:44,819 --> 00:31:46,279
No.
729
00:31:46,362 --> 00:31:49,157
Today, Mr. Right...
is right on time.
730
00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:49,991
Hi, Julie.
731
00:31:50,074 --> 00:31:50,992
Hi, Jim.
732
00:31:51,075 --> 00:31:52,744
Oh, I'm beat...
733
00:31:52,827 --> 00:31:54,162
I'm sorry I couldn't
make it yesterday
734
00:31:54,245 --> 00:31:55,496
but those old folks
ran me ragged.
735
00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:57,165
I don't know where they
get the energy.
736
00:31:57,248 --> 00:32:00,710
It seems that the sea air
does wonders for them.
737
00:32:00,793 --> 00:32:03,296
I think one of those iced teas
would do wonders for me.
738
00:32:03,379 --> 00:32:04,047
Comin' up.
739
00:32:04,130 --> 00:32:06,007
Thanks...
740
00:32:06,090 --> 00:32:08,468
Seeing you does
wonders for me, too.
741
00:32:08,551 --> 00:32:12,096
Ooh, If you're trying to sweep
me off my feet it's working.
742
00:32:12,180 --> 00:32:12,972
Mmm...
743
00:32:13,056 --> 00:32:14,098
I mean it.
744
00:32:14,182 --> 00:32:17,518
All day long I've been thinking
about being with you...
745
00:32:17,602 --> 00:32:20,396
Just sharing a quiet
moment...just the two of us.
746
00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:23,733
[Scottish bagpipe playing]
747
00:32:28,237 --> 00:32:31,699
You're about to hear a word that
you've never heard
748
00:32:31,783 --> 00:32:33,910
any Scotsman say before...
749
00:32:33,993 --> 00:32:35,578
Give me an
Irish whiskey.
750
00:32:35,662 --> 00:32:38,539
No...the drinks are on me.
751
00:32:38,623 --> 00:32:40,541
Aah!
752
00:32:45,922 --> 00:32:51,844
♪ ♪
753
00:33:46,357 --> 00:33:47,650
KITTY: Clyde...
754
00:33:47,734 --> 00:33:49,152
I want to talk with you.
755
00:33:50,737 --> 00:33:52,864
KITTY: You're acting like a
twelve-year-old...
756
00:33:54,699 --> 00:33:56,993
Well, I can wait here as
long as you can...
757
00:34:08,755 --> 00:34:11,758
Okay, nobody talk but me.
758
00:34:13,342 --> 00:34:18,514
Kelly Rixie...this simple-minded
boy has turned into lousy
759
00:34:18,598 --> 00:34:22,435
company and I hear from little
birds here and there that you're
760
00:34:22,518 --> 00:34:24,020
not any prize either.
761
00:34:25,855 --> 00:34:29,525
KITTY: Now you two dingbats go
back to being friends
762
00:34:29,609 --> 00:34:32,153
like civilized folks, or else...
763
00:34:32,236 --> 00:34:34,030
Ah. Hey!
764
00:34:34,113 --> 00:34:36,240
I haven't finished my soup!
765
00:34:49,879 --> 00:34:53,841
Did they ever
find out...who--
766
00:34:53,925 --> 00:34:56,677
in that girl's galoshes?
767
00:34:56,761 --> 00:34:58,513
No.
768
00:34:58,596 --> 00:35:00,515
Think about it
for a minute.
769
00:35:00,598 --> 00:35:03,142
What motive could someone have
to do a thing like that?
770
00:35:03,226 --> 00:35:04,352
Revenge, right?
771
00:35:04,435 --> 00:35:05,728
Wrong.
772
00:35:05,812 --> 00:35:08,397
Lucille Rumbo was a
perfectly harmless girl.
773
00:35:08,481 --> 00:35:10,066
She couldn't even hurt a flea.
774
00:35:10,149 --> 00:35:13,569
A-ha...there's your answer
Watson.
775
00:35:13,653 --> 00:35:16,864
Who logically would get revenge
on someone who couldn't hurt a
flea?
776
00:35:16,948 --> 00:35:19,158
Lucille Dumbo's own dog.
777
00:35:19,242 --> 00:35:20,910
Holmes,
I think you've got it.
778
00:35:20,993 --> 00:35:22,370
Elementary, my dear Watson.
779
00:35:22,453 --> 00:35:23,996
Elementary.
780
00:35:29,460 --> 00:35:30,503
I didn't plan on this.
781
00:35:30,586 --> 00:35:33,548
[scoffs] Neither did I.
782
00:35:33,631 --> 00:35:36,384
I don't know what
came over me.
783
00:35:36,467 --> 00:35:39,345
I put my arms
around you and...
784
00:35:39,428 --> 00:35:42,139
it was like we
were still married.
785
00:35:42,223 --> 00:35:44,392
Yeah.
786
00:35:44,475 --> 00:35:45,726
Do you think we
made a mistake?
787
00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:47,728
Yeah, we made a
hell of a mistake.
788
00:35:47,812 --> 00:35:48,896
I'm not married
to you anymore.
789
00:35:48,980 --> 00:35:52,233
No, I mean do you think we were
wrong about splitting up?
790
00:35:52,316 --> 00:35:53,901
Come on, we had a
lot going for us....
791
00:35:53,985 --> 00:35:55,361
Why...why did we rush
blindly into a divorce?
792
00:35:55,444 --> 00:35:56,362
Bar...
793
00:35:56,445 --> 00:35:58,906
Barney...we split and
reconciled three times.
794
00:35:58,990 --> 00:36:00,908
That's hardly rushing blindly...
795
00:36:02,869 --> 00:36:05,788
Life was not a poem, Barn.
796
00:36:05,872 --> 00:36:06,706
Wasn't this poetry?
797
00:36:06,789 --> 00:36:09,584
Oh, sex isn't everything.
798
00:36:09,667 --> 00:36:11,544
Well, it sure beats
whatever's in second place.
799
00:36:12,628 --> 00:36:14,797
What about sharing?
800
00:36:14,881 --> 00:36:17,758
What about respect for
the other person's feelings?
801
00:36:17,842 --> 00:36:19,969
What about unselfish devotion?
802
00:36:20,052 --> 00:36:21,345
I'd rate them about
twenty-seven...
803
00:36:21,429 --> 00:36:23,431
twenty-eight and twenty-nine.
804
00:36:23,514 --> 00:36:26,100
I just figured something out.
805
00:36:26,183 --> 00:36:28,686
The reason I've been so angry
with you since our divorce
806
00:36:28,769 --> 00:36:31,606
is because I still felt
something for you.
807
00:36:31,689 --> 00:36:33,774
I didn't understand why we
couldn't work it out
808
00:36:33,858 --> 00:36:36,068
and now I understand.
809
00:36:36,152 --> 00:36:39,447
What I felt for you was just
some leftover passion.
810
00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:41,908
What I have with Rod is much
more than that.
811
00:36:43,534 --> 00:36:45,453
How's he in the poetry
department?
812
00:36:45,536 --> 00:36:47,121
You'll never change.
813
00:36:47,204 --> 00:36:48,789
Listen, some people don't
want me to change.
814
00:36:48,873 --> 00:36:51,167
Well, some people don't
know you as well as I do.
815
00:36:51,250 --> 00:36:52,293
Judy happens to think
I'm the living end.
816
00:36:52,376 --> 00:36:53,419
How 'bout that?
817
00:36:53,502 --> 00:36:56,213
Oh, well so did I the first
week we were married.
818
00:36:56,297 --> 00:36:56,839
Come on.
819
00:36:56,923 --> 00:36:58,799
One week out of ten years?
820
00:36:58,883 --> 00:37:00,801
Well, there might have been some
other odd moments.
821
00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:01,469
Thank you very much.
822
00:37:01,552 --> 00:37:03,137
That does a lot for my ego.
823
00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:05,514
Barney, you are
what you are.
824
00:37:06,724 --> 00:37:08,893
What's that?
825
00:37:08,976 --> 00:37:12,104
A very selfish guy whose only
concern is himself.
826
00:37:13,606 --> 00:37:14,482
What do you think you are?
827
00:37:14,565 --> 00:37:16,192
St. Francis of Assisi?
828
00:37:19,236 --> 00:37:23,282
Oh, my God....we've been here
for over an hour...
829
00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:25,117
Come on, hurry up get dressed.
830
00:37:25,201 --> 00:37:26,118
TERRY: Yes.
831
00:37:26,202 --> 00:37:26,911
I mean now, Terry, don't do your
slow motion act.
832
00:37:26,994 --> 00:37:29,830
Don't boss me,
I'm not your wife!
833
00:37:29,914 --> 00:37:31,290
Well, that's the luckiest
break of my life.
834
00:37:31,374 --> 00:37:32,208
You're lucky?
835
00:37:32,291 --> 00:37:34,001
I feel like I won the Irish
sweepstakes.
836
00:37:41,968 --> 00:37:44,136
It's a shame, isn't it?
837
00:37:44,220 --> 00:37:45,554
What?
838
00:37:45,638 --> 00:37:49,350
What we've got that's good is
very good and...
839
00:37:49,433 --> 00:37:52,687
What we've got that's bad is
really rotten.
840
00:37:52,770 --> 00:37:54,021
Yeah.
841
00:37:56,816 --> 00:37:58,651
♪ ♪
842
00:38:07,910 --> 00:38:11,163
Nobody said we
were perfect.
843
00:38:11,247 --> 00:38:12,832
You're certainly not.
844
00:38:15,167 --> 00:38:17,169
[laughs]
845
00:38:20,923 --> 00:38:22,341
You know I
really like you...
846
00:38:22,425 --> 00:38:24,260
[laughs]
847
00:38:25,469 --> 00:38:27,722
I just can't stand you.
848
00:38:27,805 --> 00:38:29,348
I think I hate you, too.
849
00:38:33,102 --> 00:38:35,354
What you have to remember is
that the Hairless Dalmatians
850
00:38:35,438 --> 00:38:36,605
don't get fleas.
851
00:38:36,689 --> 00:38:37,732
You mean...
852
00:38:37,815 --> 00:38:39,692
Yes, Watson...
stop giggling.
853
00:38:39,775 --> 00:38:42,403
Lucille Dumbo has fleas and you
made the whole thing up
854
00:38:42,486 --> 00:38:44,739
so I wouldn't hate
you anymore.
855
00:38:44,822 --> 00:38:46,907
shananananananana...
856
00:38:46,991 --> 00:38:48,159
shaboom!
857
00:38:58,335 --> 00:39:00,880
GRAHAM: I wish this cruise
wasn't gonna end tomorrow.
858
00:39:00,963 --> 00:39:04,508
KELLY: Yeah...we got off to a
great start, huh?
859
00:39:08,095 --> 00:39:09,722
GRAHAM: We were both nervous.
860
00:39:09,805 --> 00:39:11,432
Speak for yourself...
861
00:39:11,515 --> 00:39:13,684
Who gave the waiter
a piece of Kleenex, huh?
862
00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:20,191
You know I think...
863
00:39:20,274 --> 00:39:22,443
What?
864
00:39:22,526 --> 00:39:23,903
I think that I uh...
865
00:39:23,986 --> 00:39:25,571
Yeah?
866
00:39:27,865 --> 00:39:30,284
Did you ever kiss
anybody before?
867
00:39:30,367 --> 00:39:32,870
Have you?
868
00:39:32,953 --> 00:39:34,246
No.
869
00:39:57,561 --> 00:40:01,148
♪ ♪
870
00:40:36,433 --> 00:40:38,060
Hey, dinner was great.
871
00:40:38,144 --> 00:40:40,479
I haven't eaten alone
since yesterday.
872
00:40:40,563 --> 00:40:41,397
I'm sorry, Julie.
873
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:42,690
I really am.
874
00:40:42,773 --> 00:40:45,192
But the gang got me involved in
a marathon Ping-Pong tournament.
875
00:40:45,276 --> 00:40:46,527
Oh? How'd you do?
876
00:40:46,610 --> 00:40:47,653
How else?
877
00:40:47,736 --> 00:40:50,239
I lost...ten games,
six pounds.
878
00:40:51,907 --> 00:40:54,869
Am I losing you too?
879
00:40:54,952 --> 00:40:56,120
No..
880
00:40:57,538 --> 00:41:00,583
Come on, Jimmy boy, let's
boogie.
881
00:41:00,666 --> 00:41:02,001
After the dance.
882
00:41:02,084 --> 00:41:03,961
You won't live that long.
883
00:41:06,672 --> 00:41:08,549
♪ ♪
884
00:41:13,679 --> 00:41:15,055
[knocks on door]
885
00:41:15,139 --> 00:41:16,390
It's me Jim.
886
00:41:16,473 --> 00:41:17,766
Just a second...
887
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:32,406
You look terrible.
888
00:41:32,489 --> 00:41:34,533
I don't feel terrible.
889
00:41:34,617 --> 00:41:35,910
I feel miserable.
890
00:41:37,953 --> 00:41:39,079
Oh...
891
00:41:42,500 --> 00:41:45,586
Oh, come cheer me up.
892
00:41:45,669 --> 00:41:46,921
Let me fix you a
drink first, okay?
893
00:41:47,004 --> 00:41:47,922
Mmmm...
894
00:41:48,005 --> 00:41:51,425
Good...good...
895
00:41:51,509 --> 00:41:55,095
Would you believe that they're
still down there dancing...
896
00:41:55,179 --> 00:41:57,223
and the band left an hour ago.
897
00:41:59,808 --> 00:42:04,104
You know I was about to give up
on this whole thing...
898
00:42:04,188 --> 00:42:08,317
But then I realized that
business comes first.
899
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:09,818
I just thank goodness we've
900
00:42:09,902 --> 00:42:13,739
finally got a moment to
ourselves...
901
00:42:13,822 --> 00:42:17,159
You know it's our last night and
we only got in one kiss.
902
00:42:17,243 --> 00:42:20,788
I'm eligible for the
Doris Day award.
903
00:42:20,871 --> 00:42:23,832
There are so many things I don't
know about you...
904
00:42:23,916 --> 00:42:27,336
like what schools you went to,
what kind of sports you like...
905
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:30,798
Jim?
906
00:42:30,881 --> 00:42:34,843
[Jim snoring]
907
00:42:34,927 --> 00:42:36,637
Jim...
908
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:39,848
[snoring]
909
00:42:44,103 --> 00:42:46,647
You look very nice tonight...
910
00:42:46,730 --> 00:42:48,065
Thank you.
911
00:42:49,483 --> 00:42:50,651
Cheers.
912
00:42:55,739 --> 00:42:59,159
CAPTAIN [V.O.]: The Princesswill be arriving in Los Angelesin thirty minutes.
913
00:42:59,243 --> 00:43:01,662
I didn't wear
half these things.
914
00:43:01,745 --> 00:43:03,872
You should have remembered
the old rule...
915
00:43:03,956 --> 00:43:07,001
you bring half as many clothes
and twice as much money.
916
00:43:09,753 --> 00:43:10,838
Rod, can I tell
you something?
917
00:43:10,921 --> 00:43:11,672
Hm-hm.
918
00:43:11,755 --> 00:43:15,718
I think you're a very
intelligent man.
919
00:43:15,801 --> 00:43:18,178
If I were that smart I would
have brought half the clothes.
920
00:43:18,262 --> 00:43:19,513
I mean it.
921
00:43:24,727 --> 00:43:28,731
Remember when you told me that I
should confront Barney
922
00:43:28,814 --> 00:43:32,860
and get whatever feelings I have
for him out in the open...
923
00:43:32,943 --> 00:43:35,487
resolve the situation.
924
00:43:35,571 --> 00:43:36,530
Well......yeah?
925
00:43:44,371 --> 00:43:46,623
Well...
926
00:43:51,086 --> 00:43:52,796
well...
927
00:43:56,133 --> 00:43:58,344
I love you very much.
928
00:44:01,430 --> 00:44:03,557
That's all you
have to say.
929
00:44:09,938 --> 00:44:11,774
♪ ♪
930
00:44:20,657 --> 00:44:22,701
I want to talk to you.
931
00:44:22,785 --> 00:44:24,453
I want to talk to you, too.
932
00:44:32,211 --> 00:44:34,546
Yesterday was the
greatest day of my life.
933
00:44:34,630 --> 00:44:36,215
Mine too.
934
00:44:36,298 --> 00:44:38,717
We have to see each other when
we get back, okay?
935
00:44:38,801 --> 00:44:40,219
Yeah.
936
00:44:41,678 --> 00:44:43,597
Well, goodbye, Kelly.
937
00:44:45,391 --> 00:44:47,101
Goodbye...
938
00:44:51,522 --> 00:44:53,482
I love you.
939
00:44:53,565 --> 00:44:54,566
What?
940
00:44:54,650 --> 00:44:56,360
I love you.
941
00:44:56,443 --> 00:44:58,237
Oh...
942
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:00,948
Well, aren't you gonna
say it back?
943
00:45:01,031 --> 00:45:03,617
Um...
944
00:45:03,701 --> 00:45:06,328
the claw, we apologize to the
charming lady,
945
00:45:06,412 --> 00:45:07,663
but there's no time to waste...
946
00:45:07,746 --> 00:45:09,623
We must stop the plot
against the king.
947
00:45:09,706 --> 00:45:12,251
KITTY: Come on, Graham, it's
time to get ready.
948
00:45:18,006 --> 00:45:19,216
Goodbye.
949
00:45:26,056 --> 00:45:27,182
Boys.
950
00:45:30,561 --> 00:45:35,149
In about thirty minutes...
this cruise is gonna be over.
951
00:45:37,234 --> 00:45:40,446
How would you describe this
whirlwind romance?
952
00:45:40,529 --> 00:45:42,197
Kinda like ships that
pass in the night.
953
00:45:42,281 --> 00:45:44,324
More like ships that
pass out in the night...
954
00:45:44,408 --> 00:45:45,784
[laughter]
955
00:45:49,371 --> 00:45:52,124
I promise you, when
I see you in L.A.
956
00:45:52,207 --> 00:45:54,501
that I'll stay awake
for the entire date.
957
00:45:56,420 --> 00:45:59,131
We still have those
thirty minutes.
958
00:46:02,050 --> 00:46:03,260
[Scotsmans coughs loud]
959
00:46:04,678 --> 00:46:07,639
Do you want to bet?
960
00:46:07,723 --> 00:46:12,895
Uh, we...we've come
to tell you somethin'...
961
00:46:12,978 --> 00:46:13,854
Go ahead tell them.
962
00:46:13,937 --> 00:46:16,356
Me...me...me...well,
well, my sister and I...
963
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,400
Alright, I'll tell him.
964
00:46:18,484 --> 00:46:22,029
We came to say
we're sorry...
965
00:46:22,112 --> 00:46:26,033
We know if we hadn't monopolized
Jimmy boy, you and he would have
966
00:46:26,116 --> 00:46:31,205
as they say in our day....no,
they never said that in our day.
967
00:46:31,288 --> 00:46:33,248
You don't have to
apologize, Miss Spencer.
968
00:46:33,332 --> 00:46:34,208
SPENCER: Oh, I'm not.
969
00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:35,667
I'm explaining.
970
00:46:35,751 --> 00:46:38,337
You see at the Golden
Ages Home where we live...
971
00:46:38,420 --> 00:46:41,298
Oh, it's nice,
but...it's dull.
972
00:46:42,424 --> 00:46:45,385
So once a year we
go away and raise cane.
973
00:46:45,469 --> 00:46:47,679
If we did it twice a year
974
00:46:47,763 --> 00:46:50,057
they'd take away the
warranty on my pacemaker.
975
00:46:50,140 --> 00:46:52,434
[laughter]
976
00:46:53,810 --> 00:46:57,773
So we're selfish, our fun
got in the way of yours.
977
00:46:57,856 --> 00:47:01,109
We're sorry, but
we're realistic.
978
00:47:01,193 --> 00:47:03,195
You've got more
time than we do.
979
00:47:03,278 --> 00:47:05,614
Oh, don't say that.
980
00:47:05,697 --> 00:47:08,075
We don't want you to feel
sorry for us...
981
00:47:08,158 --> 00:47:10,869
we just want you to understand.
982
00:47:10,953 --> 00:47:11,578
We understand....
983
00:47:11,662 --> 00:47:13,330
believe me.
984
00:47:14,998 --> 00:47:16,500
♪ ♪
985
00:47:18,794 --> 00:47:20,337
JIM: Well...
986
00:47:23,507 --> 00:47:27,052
I...better get the
group ready to go ashore.
987
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:30,973
I'll be in touch.
988
00:47:32,474 --> 00:47:33,642
Yeah.
989
00:47:54,329 --> 00:47:59,501
♪ ♪
990
00:47:59,876 --> 00:48:02,421
Well, Kelly, how'd
everything work out?
991
00:48:02,504 --> 00:48:04,464
Well...
992
00:48:04,548 --> 00:48:08,176
I guess he's just one of those
guys you never quite figure out.
993
00:48:08,260 --> 00:48:09,136
GRAHAM: Kelly!
994
00:48:09,219 --> 00:48:10,971
Hey, Kelly!
995
00:48:11,054 --> 00:48:15,183
That thing you said you'd do,
well I do too, I really do.
996
00:48:21,023 --> 00:48:23,984
What's he mean by that?
997
00:48:24,067 --> 00:48:27,779
The claw will never tell
you that information.
998
00:48:27,863 --> 00:48:29,656
She will die first.
999
00:48:30,907 --> 00:48:32,576
[roaring]
1000
00:48:37,956 --> 00:48:39,833
Judy, it was really
nice meeting you
1001
00:48:39,916 --> 00:48:41,293
but we should have won
that Bingo game.
1002
00:48:41,376 --> 00:48:44,129
Yeah, I think that
little old lady rigged it.
1003
00:48:44,212 --> 00:48:45,547
Hey, Rod, I got to
tell you somethin'...
1004
00:48:45,631 --> 00:48:46,465
you're not a bad guy.
1005
00:48:46,548 --> 00:48:47,883
I mean you're a lousy
marriage counsellor
1006
00:48:47,966 --> 00:48:50,510
but you're not a bad guy.
1007
00:48:50,594 --> 00:48:52,304
Let's hope Judy and I never have
to do business with you.
1008
00:48:52,387 --> 00:48:53,639
Are you getting married?
1009
00:48:53,722 --> 00:48:56,725
Yeah, I need a tax break...
1010
00:48:56,808 --> 00:48:57,684
I love her.
1011
00:48:57,768 --> 00:48:58,352
TERRY: Congratulations.
1012
00:48:58,435 --> 00:48:59,353
Thanks.
1013
00:48:59,436 --> 00:49:00,312
And good luck.
1014
00:49:00,395 --> 00:49:00,937
JUDY: Thanks.
1015
00:49:01,021 --> 00:49:01,396
Ah, we ought to get goin'.
1016
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,023
Yes, we should.
1017
00:49:18,455 --> 00:49:20,457
♪ ♪
70023
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