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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,041 --> 00:00:02,417 ♪ Jingle bell, jingle bell ♪ 2 00:00:02,500 --> 00:00:04,083 ♪ Jingle bell rock ♪ 3 00:00:04,166 --> 00:00:06,375 ♪ Jingle bell 'round the clock ♪ 4 00:00:06,959 --> 00:00:09,917 ♪ Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet ♪ 5 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:11,333 ♪ That's the jingle bell ♪ 6 00:00:11,417 --> 00:00:14,583 ♪ That's the jingle bell rock ♪ 7 00:00:17,417 --> 00:00:20,125 This is a staff meeting, Mr. Shore. 8 00:00:21,750 --> 00:00:22,917 I realize that. 9 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,792 Why are you in a Santa suit? 10 00:00:24,875 --> 00:00:26,000 It's after Thanksgiving. 11 00:00:26,083 --> 00:00:28,875 Surely you're not suggesting I still dress as a pilgrim. 12 00:00:28,959 --> 00:00:30,166 And who is this? 13 00:00:30,250 --> 00:00:31,375 She's my elf. 14 00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:35,542 Sometimes, especially after Santa’s been drinking 15 00:00:35,625 --> 00:00:37,041 he needs a little helper. 16 00:00:37,792 --> 00:00:39,542 Have you been drinking today? 17 00:00:39,625 --> 00:00:42,709 No. Today, I just brought her for amusement. 18 00:00:42,792 --> 00:00:45,375 My doctors are concerned these staff meetings 19 00:00:45,458 --> 00:00:48,333 could cause me to lapse into a coma. 20 00:00:48,917 --> 00:00:50,208 I see. 21 00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:52,709 Well, since privileged information is exchanged 22 00:00:52,792 --> 00:00:57,125 during these staff meetings, your helper will have to leave. 23 00:00:59,500 --> 00:01:01,500 Would you wait in my office, dear? 24 00:01:01,583 --> 00:01:03,208 Sure. 25 00:01:17,709 --> 00:01:20,166 Actually, there is that, uh, walk-in. 26 00:01:20,250 --> 00:01:22,333 He's waiting in reception. Maybe Alan should take that. 27 00:01:24,709 --> 00:01:25,625 Perhaps you're right. 28 00:01:25,709 --> 00:01:28,333 A wrongful termination. A guy was fired as a department store Santa. 29 00:01:28,417 --> 00:01:29,959 -Ha. -I mean, since you seem to have 30 00:01:30,041 --> 00:01:33,000 such a connection with the subject matter. 31 00:01:33,083 --> 00:01:34,166 I'll do it. 32 00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:38,250 I've always wanted a Santa case. 33 00:01:38,333 --> 00:01:40,250 Oh, this is much more right for Alan. 34 00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:41,458 I said I'll do it. 35 00:01:43,375 --> 00:01:45,375 -Where is he? -Uh, in reception. 36 00:01:52,625 --> 00:01:53,709 Gil Furnald? 37 00:01:55,291 --> 00:01:56,166 That's me. 38 00:02:03,875 --> 00:02:05,417 -No, it isn't. -Yes, it is. 39 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,375 No, it isn't. 40 00:02:07,959 --> 00:02:09,417 Ho, ho, ho. 41 00:02:09,750 --> 00:02:10,917 Deal with it. 42 00:02:12,834 --> 00:02:14,333 Alan. 43 00:02:14,417 --> 00:02:15,417 Tara. 44 00:02:15,500 --> 00:02:16,834 What's with the woman? 45 00:02:16,917 --> 00:02:18,291 -What woman? -What woman? 46 00:02:18,375 --> 00:02:20,542 The one you brought to the staff meeting. 47 00:02:20,625 --> 00:02:21,750 She's my elf, Tara. 48 00:02:21,834 --> 00:02:24,083 -I thought I was quite clear on that. -Yes, very amusing. 49 00:02:24,208 --> 00:02:25,041 Why is she here? 50 00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:27,917 Well, it seems I've put on a few pounds since last year. 51 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:31,250 So she brought me my new suit. I do some work with the Salvation Army. 52 00:02:31,333 --> 00:02:32,917 We work as a team, actually. 53 00:02:34,125 --> 00:02:35,000 Is there a problem? 54 00:02:36,417 --> 00:02:37,959 -Not at all. -But? 55 00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:39,917 Not that I've been doing background checks, 56 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:44,875 but I have a friend who evidently knows an old friend of yours and... 57 00:02:44,959 --> 00:02:46,041 And? 58 00:02:46,125 --> 00:02:50,458 You once cohabited with a little person. 59 00:02:51,166 --> 00:02:52,583 Two lovely years. 60 00:02:52,667 --> 00:02:54,083 I lived with her for three. 61 00:02:54,166 --> 00:02:55,333 Do you have a thing... 62 00:02:56,291 --> 00:02:57,500 for little women? 63 00:02:59,917 --> 00:03:01,458 I have a thing for women. 64 00:03:02,417 --> 00:03:04,625 You've never fallen for someone shorter than you? 65 00:03:04,709 --> 00:03:06,542 Well, I believe I'm involved with one now. 66 00:03:13,500 --> 00:03:15,834 Either you're mistaken, or I'm jealous. 67 00:03:50,917 --> 00:03:55,333 {\an8}It's just very difficult to reconcile being drawn to a person I consider... 68 00:03:55,458 --> 00:03:57,959 ...well, repugnant. 69 00:03:59,208 --> 00:04:01,417 What, you think you're the first good girl to fall for a bad boy? 70 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,333 Is my problem annoying you? 71 00:04:05,333 --> 00:04:07,875 {\an8} No, I'm sorry. I... 72 00:04:08,458 --> 00:04:11,458 {\an8}I just meant to convey it's very common for women 73 00:04:11,542 --> 00:04:13,583 to be attracted to men they don't admire. 74 00:04:13,667 --> 00:04:14,625 What could be at play here, 75 00:04:14,709 --> 00:04:16,333 there are qualities in yourself you don't like 76 00:04:16,417 --> 00:04:18,000 or qualities about Alan Shore you wish you had-- 77 00:04:18,083 --> 00:04:20,583 That isn't it. I like myself just fine. 78 00:04:23,583 --> 00:04:25,333 I saw that. 79 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,000 Uh... 80 00:04:28,875 --> 00:04:30,917 {\an8}Look, this... 81 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:32,959 {\an8}...is not a great day for me. 82 00:04:33,041 --> 00:04:34,208 Perhaps we should reschedule? 83 00:04:34,959 --> 00:04:35,792 Okay. 84 00:04:39,083 --> 00:04:40,417 Is everything okay? 85 00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:41,333 Yeah. 86 00:04:44,750 --> 00:04:46,166 Could I speak to you... 87 00:04:47,750 --> 00:04:48,959 as a lawyer? 88 00:04:49,041 --> 00:04:50,709 {\an8}Uh... sure. 89 00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:55,000 {\an8}But you're going to have to face the little clock towards me. 90 00:04:55,792 --> 00:04:58,166 This is all privileged, right, lawyer, client? 91 00:04:59,250 --> 00:05:00,250 Of course. 92 00:05:01,583 --> 00:05:05,709 {\an8}Look, I-- I have a patient who's been with me for almost four years now. 93 00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:07,125 And he, um... 94 00:05:07,583 --> 00:05:10,667 He habitually speaks of fantasies, 95 00:05:10,750 --> 00:05:12,667 uh, things he plans to do. 96 00:05:13,250 --> 00:05:16,542 {\an8}They're typically idle ruminations, I suppose, to make him feel better. 97 00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:21,792 {\an8}Lately, he's been talking about murdering his ex-wife. 98 00:05:21,875 --> 00:05:24,375 And at first, I thought, harmless chatter again. 99 00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:27,417 But there seems to be such a resolve. 100 00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:29,583 Lori, I can't be sure that it isn't real this time. 101 00:05:29,667 --> 00:05:32,417 This man may very well be planning to kill his ex-wife 102 00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:34,375 and I'm just not sure what to do. 103 00:05:49,291 --> 00:05:51,583 {\an8} 104 00:05:51,667 --> 00:05:54,625 {\an8}I just like wearing women's clothes sometimes. 105 00:05:54,709 --> 00:05:56,834 It's not a sexual turn-on, it... 106 00:05:56,917 --> 00:05:59,375 Well, it just feels right sometimes. 107 00:05:59,458 --> 00:06:01,625 So basically, you're a sicko. 108 00:06:02,208 --> 00:06:04,667 -I'm not sick. -Lighten up, man. 109 00:06:06,083 --> 00:06:08,917 {\an8}So, what, you got caught in a skirt and that was it? 110 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:12,208 My employer found out, and yes, I got fired. 111 00:06:12,291 --> 00:06:16,125 They asked me a lot of questions, like whether I'm gay. 112 00:06:17,041 --> 00:06:18,667 Are you? 113 00:06:18,750 --> 00:06:20,417 Uh, not that there's anything wrong with it. 114 00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:21,917 Yes. 115 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,417 But that does not make me an unfit Santa. 116 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:26,792 {\an8}-Criminal record? No. No, no, no. 117 00:06:26,875 --> 00:06:28,542 {\an8}And there's never been any incident. 118 00:06:29,166 --> 00:06:31,667 I have been a good Santa for eight years. 119 00:06:31,917 --> 00:06:33,792 A great Santa. 120 00:06:33,875 --> 00:06:35,667 Huh, I can show you the letters. 121 00:06:35,750 --> 00:06:40,041 There are kids and families who have specifically come back for me. 122 00:06:40,125 --> 00:06:43,125 And I thought, this is wrong. 123 00:06:43,208 --> 00:06:47,166 I should not lose my job because of how I like to dress. 124 00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:57,375 {\an8} 125 00:06:57,458 --> 00:06:58,792 {\an8}Does he know you taped him? 126 00:06:58,875 --> 00:07:01,625 {\an8}No, I'm just full of ethical violations. 127 00:07:06,458 --> 00:07:09,166 {\an8}It's important that I do it with my hands. 128 00:07:09,250 --> 00:07:11,792 {\an8}I don't know why. You could probably tell me why. 129 00:07:11,875 --> 00:07:14,333 But see, the thing is... 130 00:07:14,417 --> 00:07:15,875 I don't want to shoot her 131 00:07:15,959 --> 00:07:19,959 {\an8}or, uh, poison her or hit her with a car. No. 132 00:07:20,041 --> 00:07:22,166 It needs to be by strangulation. 133 00:07:22,250 --> 00:07:24,875 Do you have any guess as to why? 134 00:07:24,959 --> 00:07:26,375 Well, for one, 135 00:07:26,458 --> 00:07:29,375 {\an8}I actually want to feel the life going out of her 136 00:07:29,458 --> 00:07:30,667 {\an8}I mean, with my hands. 137 00:07:30,750 --> 00:07:33,083 {\an8}I want to feel her body go limp. 138 00:07:33,166 --> 00:07:35,792 Also, I want her to experience it. 139 00:07:35,875 --> 00:07:41,250 {\an8}I want her to know that she's dying and I want to see her eyes as I do it. 140 00:07:43,875 --> 00:07:45,875 And how do you know that this isn't just talk? 141 00:07:45,959 --> 00:07:48,000 I keep telling you, I don't know. 142 00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:49,792 I, I mean, he's often fantasized. 143 00:07:49,875 --> 00:07:51,834 Last year, he spoke of blowing up his boss. 144 00:07:51,917 --> 00:07:53,625 But his demeanor here, 145 00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:57,208 as I said, there's a certain resolve that really concerns me. 146 00:07:57,291 --> 00:07:59,333 Have you shown this to any other therapists or-- 147 00:07:59,417 --> 00:08:02,000 No. No, no, I am the only one who can make that call. 148 00:08:02,083 --> 00:08:04,583 And your call is it's possible he's going to do it. 149 00:08:06,375 --> 00:08:07,792 Do I tell the ex-wife? 150 00:08:08,667 --> 00:08:11,709 Well, I'm sure you know the law on this as well as I do. 151 00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,417 I mean, you have a duty to warn the victim 152 00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:15,917 if you're reasonably certain she's in physical danger. 153 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,875 But falling short of being certain-- 154 00:08:17,959 --> 00:08:19,959 You honor doctor-patient privilege. 155 00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:22,000 This just seems crazy to me. 156 00:08:22,083 --> 00:08:26,083 I-- which side is better to err on? 157 00:08:32,166 --> 00:08:34,375 A trial today? 158 00:08:34,458 --> 00:08:36,834 Well, it's not exactly a trial. It's an evidentiary hearing. 159 00:08:37,208 --> 00:08:38,917 But I'd need to testify? 160 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,000 It's the only way you can get a restraining order. 161 00:08:41,417 --> 00:08:43,083 We'll lose the dress, by the way. 162 00:08:43,166 --> 00:08:44,333 Coat and tie. 163 00:08:44,959 --> 00:08:46,291 Alan, excellent! 164 00:08:46,375 --> 00:08:49,750 Alan, Gil Furnald, Alan Shore. 165 00:08:49,834 --> 00:08:54,917 Turns out that my Santa Claus is a sort of cross-dressing sicko. 166 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,792 He's more you. 167 00:08:56,875 --> 00:08:58,875 He is absolutely more me, Denny, 168 00:08:58,959 --> 00:09:01,041 -but unfortunately, my schedule-- -Alan. 169 00:09:01,709 --> 00:09:04,583 I have trouble with this sort of subject matter. 170 00:09:04,667 --> 00:09:06,792 -You're homophobic. -It's not that. 171 00:09:06,875 --> 00:09:08,083 What is it then? 172 00:09:09,208 --> 00:09:10,250 It's my father. 173 00:09:11,834 --> 00:09:13,250 Sometimes he wore dresses. 174 00:09:13,875 --> 00:09:18,333 He called it a kilt and sang all those Scottish songs, but we knew. 175 00:09:19,792 --> 00:09:22,041 Please. The hearing's at two o'clock. 176 00:09:30,792 --> 00:09:31,709 Hello. 177 00:09:32,667 --> 00:09:33,500 Hello. 178 00:09:38,041 --> 00:09:39,291 Sally. 179 00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:42,166 Could I trouble you to do a quick background check? 180 00:09:42,250 --> 00:09:45,417 I realize we haven't spoken much since we stopped having sex 181 00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:46,834 and frankly... 182 00:09:46,917 --> 00:09:49,709 ...I'm dismayed by that. 183 00:09:49,792 --> 00:09:53,166 But what I need to know is everything you can find out about my new client. 184 00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:55,041 Here's his name, address, and social security-- 185 00:09:55,125 --> 00:09:57,750 Is it true you're taking over the Santa case? 186 00:09:57,834 --> 00:09:59,583 Yes, I am, Bradley. 187 00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:00,750 Is it of interest to you? 188 00:10:01,667 --> 00:10:03,834 No, but it could be... 189 00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:06,625 If we say, bet on it? 190 00:10:06,709 --> 00:10:08,792 Another wager. 191 00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:10,291 Why not? 192 00:10:10,375 --> 00:10:12,458 And would you already have stakes in mine? 193 00:10:12,542 --> 00:10:14,542 I keep thinking about your elf. 194 00:10:14,625 --> 00:10:16,709 How about if you win, I become your elf for the day 195 00:10:16,792 --> 00:10:19,875 but if you lose, you become mine? 196 00:10:19,959 --> 00:10:21,834 -Complete with the costume. -Of course. 197 00:10:21,917 --> 00:10:23,750 -And bells. -Oh, can't leave out the bells. 198 00:10:23,834 --> 00:10:27,000 Alan. Hey, can I steal you for a second? 199 00:10:27,083 --> 00:10:32,375 A second? A minute I could maybe do, but a second would be pushing it. 200 00:10:33,458 --> 00:10:35,208 Would you like me to push it? 201 00:10:36,458 --> 00:10:40,542 You are so disgustingly vulgar. It's important. 202 00:10:46,917 --> 00:10:48,291 This is Dr. Konigsberg. 203 00:10:48,375 --> 00:10:49,834 -Alan Shore. -Hello. 204 00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:52,083 Oh, Alan Shore. 205 00:10:54,250 --> 00:10:58,625 Uh, Dr. Konigsberg has a patient who talks about killing his ex-wife 206 00:10:58,709 --> 00:11:00,125 and could be serious about it. 207 00:11:00,208 --> 00:11:02,417 "Could" is the operative word. I can't be sure. 208 00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:04,291 Obviously, there are some exposure problems. 209 00:11:04,375 --> 00:11:06,083 I mean, if the guy does do it, 210 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:09,250 and it was learned that Dr. Konigsberg knew of the risks beforehand-- 211 00:11:09,333 --> 00:11:11,333 The first thing I'd check is his malpractice policy. 212 00:11:11,417 --> 00:11:13,542 You don't want to do anything to void coverage. 213 00:11:13,625 --> 00:11:16,000 -I've done that already. -What's your specialty? 214 00:11:16,083 --> 00:11:17,083 Couples counseling. 215 00:11:17,166 --> 00:11:20,000 I first saw the client and his wife together. 216 00:11:20,083 --> 00:11:21,667 Since their divorce, I've been working with him alone. 217 00:11:21,750 --> 00:11:23,917 So they came to you to improve their relationship 218 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,500 and now one wants to kill the other. 219 00:11:25,583 --> 00:11:27,083 Not your best work, was it, doctor? 220 00:11:29,625 --> 00:11:31,917 And you're seeing Dr. Konigsberg for what? 221 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,458 Uh, just to deal with... 222 00:11:35,667 --> 00:11:37,333 As a lawyer, he hired me. 223 00:11:38,208 --> 00:11:40,583 He's a very mischievous man. 224 00:11:40,667 --> 00:11:42,083 Look, can we stick to the case, folks? 225 00:11:42,166 --> 00:11:44,375 Since the proposed victim was or is a patient, 226 00:11:44,458 --> 00:11:46,250 you've got real duty problems. 227 00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,083 If the threat is real and you don't tell her-- 228 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:51,166 But I can't be sure it's real, which means my duty is to the patient. 229 00:11:51,250 --> 00:11:52,792 Can you have another therapist meet with him 230 00:11:52,875 --> 00:11:53,959 perhaps, get an objective opinion? 231 00:11:54,041 --> 00:11:57,583 I've tried. No therapist will go near it for fear of potential liability. 232 00:11:57,667 --> 00:11:58,792 Well, if it were me, 233 00:11:58,875 --> 00:12:01,333 I'd meet with him myself pretending to be one of your colleagues. 234 00:12:01,417 --> 00:12:03,083 That's hardly an option. 235 00:12:03,166 --> 00:12:04,458 Why? You need objectivity-- 236 00:12:04,542 --> 00:12:06,917 You can't go there pretending to be a doctor. 237 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,291 Of course I can't because I'm in trial, but you can do it. 238 00:12:09,375 --> 00:12:10,750 Oh, sure. And get disbarred? 239 00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:12,250 I'd likely lose my license. 240 00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:15,166 Oh, well, silly me. 241 00:12:15,250 --> 00:12:16,625 I was thinking about the ex-wife. 242 00:12:16,709 --> 00:12:18,500 If it's merely a bar card and a medical license 243 00:12:18,583 --> 00:12:19,792 you're looking to preserve, 244 00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:23,041 you first opine to Lori that you're not at all convinced 245 00:12:23,125 --> 00:12:24,792 the man intends to follow through on his threats, 246 00:12:24,875 --> 00:12:26,834 then you draft an opinion letter to the doctor 247 00:12:26,917 --> 00:12:28,750 telling him he need not disclose. 248 00:12:28,834 --> 00:12:30,750 Your respective asses will be covered 249 00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:33,500 and everybody's happy, assuming you like your asses covered. 250 00:12:33,583 --> 00:12:37,417 Personally, I love the feel of a stiff breeze against my rosy cheeks. 251 00:12:40,041 --> 00:12:42,875 In any event, pardon my misunderstanding. 252 00:12:42,959 --> 00:12:45,291 I thought it was potentially human life at stake. 253 00:13:08,166 --> 00:13:09,125 Sylvia. 254 00:13:10,250 --> 00:13:11,792 What do you want now? 255 00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:13,166 Oh, why do you always think I want something? 256 00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:14,458 Why couldn't it be that I just want to see 257 00:13:14,542 --> 00:13:17,291 the smiling face of the prettiest girl in the clerk's office? 258 00:13:17,375 --> 00:13:19,166 What do you want, Brad? 259 00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:21,709 -I need a small favor. Tiny. -Hmm. 260 00:13:21,792 --> 00:13:23,875 But first, please can I see that smile? 261 00:13:23,959 --> 00:13:25,333 God. 262 00:13:25,417 --> 00:13:28,000 -If I were ten years younger... -Or ten years older. 263 00:13:28,083 --> 00:13:29,667 What's the favor? 264 00:13:30,250 --> 00:13:31,917 There's a motion scheduled for this afternoon. 265 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:34,083 Furnald vs. Gordon's Department Store. 266 00:13:34,166 --> 00:13:37,625 A lawyer named Alan Shore is seeking injunctive relief, unlawful discharge. 267 00:13:37,709 --> 00:13:40,166 I need this case to fall on Judge Hingham’s docket. 268 00:13:40,250 --> 00:13:42,083 Judge Hingham? Why would you want him? 269 00:13:42,166 --> 00:13:44,041 Because he's just right for this one. 270 00:13:44,834 --> 00:13:47,000 Exactly what kind of case is this? 271 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,125 A homosexual? 272 00:13:50,709 --> 00:13:52,000 That's where we're at now? 273 00:13:52,834 --> 00:13:56,709 Santa Clauses being played by homosexuals. 274 00:13:57,250 --> 00:13:59,625 I believe "homosexual" is one word, judge. 275 00:13:59,709 --> 00:14:01,917 But to avoid confusion, let's say "gay." 276 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,417 Let's say "transvestite" 277 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:05,041 because that was the stated reason-- 278 00:14:05,125 --> 00:14:08,375 Well, if dress code is the issue, my client promises to comply with-- 279 00:14:08,458 --> 00:14:10,834 A homosexual transvestite? 280 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:14,000 You want me to allow children to sit in his lap? 281 00:14:15,625 --> 00:14:16,834 -Exactly. -Oh, boy. 282 00:14:16,917 --> 00:14:19,125 Gordon's Department Store certainly supports 283 00:14:19,208 --> 00:14:21,750 Mr. Furnald's right to choose who or what-- 284 00:14:21,834 --> 00:14:24,667 That's a lie. You fired him as soon as he told you he was gay. 285 00:14:24,750 --> 00:14:27,875 No, we fired him for cross-dressing, which is considered a fetish. 286 00:14:27,959 --> 00:14:30,125 He's played Santa for eight years without incident. 287 00:14:30,208 --> 00:14:34,000 In fact, he's received glowing praise from both parents and employers. 288 00:14:34,083 --> 00:14:35,709 Would you sit in his lap? 289 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:37,542 Sure. Why not? 290 00:14:46,083 --> 00:14:49,834 And he hasn't gone homo erectus on me if that was your fear. 291 00:14:50,667 --> 00:14:52,375 You're making entendres. 292 00:14:52,458 --> 00:14:56,083 Disgusting, sick innuendo entendres. 293 00:14:56,917 --> 00:14:58,959 I'm not going to put an innocent child... 294 00:14:59,041 --> 00:15:01,083 ...in the lap of an unnatural Santa Claus 295 00:15:01,166 --> 00:15:02,542 who dresses in female attire. 296 00:15:02,625 --> 00:15:06,000 There is a sanctity to the tradition of Christmas. 297 00:15:06,083 --> 00:15:10,083 It is perhaps the most sanctimonious holiday there is. 298 00:15:10,166 --> 00:15:12,083 Then clearly you should be its poster boy. 299 00:15:14,667 --> 00:15:17,125 Motion for TRO. Denied. 300 00:15:17,208 --> 00:15:19,000 I'd at least like an evidentiary hearing 301 00:15:19,083 --> 00:15:20,208 -so that I may present-- -Denied. 302 00:15:20,291 --> 00:15:23,458 Denied, denied, denied. 303 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,333 Why did you do that? 304 00:15:31,417 --> 00:15:32,917 You antagonized him. 305 00:15:33,750 --> 00:15:35,291 Actually, he antagonized me. 306 00:15:37,875 --> 00:15:41,375 This job means something to me, Mr. Shore. 307 00:15:51,417 --> 00:15:52,583 Your Honor. 308 00:15:52,667 --> 00:15:54,792 I have made my ruling. 309 00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:57,458 Yes, based on what you think my client is 310 00:15:57,542 --> 00:15:59,458 or what the defense has presented him to be. 311 00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:03,542 I ask you to at least hear from him before you take away his livelihood. 312 00:16:03,625 --> 00:16:06,875 Ten minutes as to why he'd make a good Santa. 313 00:16:06,959 --> 00:16:07,834 Please. 314 00:16:11,291 --> 00:16:12,667 I'll give you ten minutes. 315 00:16:12,750 --> 00:16:15,125 Five for direct, five for cross. 316 00:16:17,750 --> 00:16:19,583 I don't understand why she's here. 317 00:16:19,667 --> 00:16:20,792 I explained it, Brian. 318 00:16:20,875 --> 00:16:24,125 When a patient makes a credible threat to commit violence, 319 00:16:24,208 --> 00:16:27,250 my colleague is here to observe because I may need counsel. 320 00:16:27,333 --> 00:16:30,041 Why? You should've told me this before. 321 00:16:31,208 --> 00:16:34,917 Brian, would you tell Dr. Harper why you want to kill your ex-wife? 322 00:16:38,542 --> 00:16:40,000 I have no intention of killing her. 323 00:16:42,834 --> 00:16:44,125 -You don't? -Of course not. 324 00:16:44,208 --> 00:16:46,166 Murder is illegal in Massachusetts. 325 00:16:46,250 --> 00:16:48,625 So when you were saying these things to Dr. Konigsberg-- 326 00:16:48,709 --> 00:16:50,083 I never said them. 327 00:16:50,166 --> 00:16:51,917 Dr. Konigsberg is mistaken. 328 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:56,083 I also have absolutely no intention of paying for two therapists. 329 00:16:56,166 --> 00:16:57,250 Goodbye. 330 00:17:04,792 --> 00:17:06,709 Clearly, he's a little hostile. 331 00:17:06,792 --> 00:17:10,625 Well, he's angry over you being here and I-- I can't say that I blame him. 332 00:17:11,208 --> 00:17:13,208 I don't know if there's enough to go to the police, 333 00:17:13,291 --> 00:17:15,959 but I think you should at least tell his ex-wife. 334 00:17:18,333 --> 00:17:19,458 Will you go with me? 335 00:17:20,709 --> 00:17:22,583 -Me? -Lori, I'm about to break privilege 336 00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:24,375 and I could very well be sued for it. 337 00:17:24,458 --> 00:17:27,166 This is treacherous ground and I would like my lawyer present. 338 00:17:27,250 --> 00:17:29,875 So please do this with me. 339 00:17:43,208 --> 00:17:46,166 I'm afraid my words are having little impact. 340 00:17:47,125 --> 00:17:48,375 Yours will have to. 341 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:49,917 Okay. 342 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:54,417 You said this job means something to you and you seemed rather impassioned. 343 00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:55,750 I am. 344 00:17:56,333 --> 00:17:58,625 You have a college education, Mr. Furnald. 345 00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:00,083 You do well in your computer job. 346 00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:03,208 Why is this part-time employment so important? 347 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,834 -I don't know. -Yes, you do. 348 00:18:11,041 --> 00:18:12,250 I suppose... 349 00:18:14,375 --> 00:18:15,417 as a kid, 350 00:18:16,250 --> 00:18:17,583 a gay kid 351 00:18:17,667 --> 00:18:19,041 who liked to wear dresses. 352 00:18:20,125 --> 00:18:22,083 That club is very small, by the way. 353 00:18:22,166 --> 00:18:24,375 Most cross-dressers are heterosexual. 354 00:18:26,125 --> 00:18:29,542 Anyway, um, as a kid who... 355 00:18:34,250 --> 00:18:36,333 felt like he didn't belong anywhere, 356 00:18:39,166 --> 00:18:43,834 I would throw myself into all the make-believe 357 00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:45,750 that goes with Christmas. 358 00:18:47,250 --> 00:18:48,083 Hm... 359 00:18:48,917 --> 00:18:50,500 As safe retreats go, 360 00:18:51,917 --> 00:18:53,542 I suppose it helped me survive. 361 00:18:58,125 --> 00:18:59,291 And it still does. 362 00:19:03,291 --> 00:19:04,709 Should I say that tomorrow? 363 00:19:05,917 --> 00:19:07,083 Say all of it. 364 00:19:11,041 --> 00:19:12,417 Would you tell? 365 00:19:14,250 --> 00:19:15,375 I don't know. 366 00:19:16,208 --> 00:19:17,500 I mean, if it's a fantasy... 367 00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:19,667 What if it's not? 368 00:19:21,875 --> 00:19:23,834 The benefit of the doubt has to go to privilege. 369 00:19:24,792 --> 00:19:26,583 Even when the downside is death? 370 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:32,041 I'm not saying that it's an easy call. 371 00:19:40,166 --> 00:19:41,458 He got a hearing. 372 00:19:43,125 --> 00:19:44,041 Sorry? 373 00:19:44,875 --> 00:19:47,625 Shore, the cross-dressing Santa Claus. He actually got a hearing. 374 00:19:49,083 --> 00:19:51,542 Don't you think you're taking this bet thing a little too far? 375 00:19:51,625 --> 00:19:54,542 I'm not making a big deal about this. I'm just making conversation here. 376 00:19:54,625 --> 00:19:58,083 Brad, you don't like Alan, do you? 377 00:20:01,917 --> 00:20:03,959 I don't give the guy a thought one way or the other. 378 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,375 Can I say something to you as a friend? 379 00:20:11,583 --> 00:20:15,083 You've seemed kind of knotted up ever since he got here. 380 00:20:15,166 --> 00:20:17,834 It might help you if you just let your feelings out a little. 381 00:20:19,875 --> 00:20:23,125 Come on, it's late at night, you're having a beer with a buddy. 382 00:20:23,834 --> 00:20:26,291 Tell me how you feel about Alan Shore. 383 00:20:30,208 --> 00:20:31,166 I don't like him. 384 00:20:31,875 --> 00:20:34,625 You can go deeper than that. What do you feel, Brad? 385 00:20:34,709 --> 00:20:36,667 I hate him. He mocks me. 386 00:20:37,208 --> 00:20:38,041 Deeper? 387 00:20:38,125 --> 00:20:40,125 -He mocks our commander-in-chief. -Deeper. 388 00:20:40,208 --> 00:20:41,709 He's got a putty ass and a flabby body 389 00:20:41,792 --> 00:20:45,208 and I can't understand why women would rather sleep with him than me. 390 00:20:45,291 --> 00:20:46,834 There, it's out. 391 00:20:46,917 --> 00:20:48,750 And that includes you, by the way. 392 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:53,000 First of all, I don't sleep with colleagues. 393 00:20:53,083 --> 00:20:54,917 -You're ducking the issue. -I am not. 394 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,333 I have no interest in ducking either one of you. 395 00:21:00,250 --> 00:21:01,709 We've gone deep enough. 396 00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:09,625 I really need to win this bet. 397 00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:19,875 According to employees at Gordon’s 398 00:21:19,959 --> 00:21:22,333 Gil Furnald gets nothing but raves as Santa. 399 00:21:22,417 --> 00:21:24,333 Oh, come on, would you sit in his lap? 400 00:21:24,417 --> 00:21:27,000 Why does everybody keep asking me that? 401 00:21:27,083 --> 00:21:28,875 Tough break drawing Judge Hingham. 402 00:21:30,583 --> 00:21:32,125 Who'd ever imagine that? 403 00:21:33,917 --> 00:21:34,834 Brad. 404 00:21:36,750 --> 00:21:39,834 Did you have something to do with my drawing Judge Hingham? 405 00:21:40,792 --> 00:21:42,125 That would be dirty pool. 406 00:21:48,792 --> 00:21:50,959 I actually want to feel the life going out of her. 407 00:21:51,583 --> 00:21:55,000 I mean, with my hands. I want to feel her body go limp. 408 00:21:55,583 --> 00:21:58,125 Also, I want her to experience it. 409 00:21:58,208 --> 00:22:00,917 I want her to know that she's dying. 410 00:22:01,625 --> 00:22:03,000 And I don't want it to be instant. 411 00:22:03,417 --> 00:22:06,792 I want her to actually have the thought, "My God, he's killing me!" 412 00:22:07,375 --> 00:22:09,667 And I wanna see her eyes as I do it. 413 00:22:12,166 --> 00:22:13,834 What's happened to him? 414 00:22:15,750 --> 00:22:16,792 Let me reiterate. 415 00:22:16,875 --> 00:22:20,208 He's talked like this before without ever going through with it, obviously. 416 00:22:20,291 --> 00:22:21,500 Many people fantasize-- 417 00:22:21,583 --> 00:22:25,000 For him to even speak this way, this is not Brian. 418 00:22:25,083 --> 00:22:27,959 -He is a docile person. -I realize that. 419 00:22:28,041 --> 00:22:30,083 This might also simply be talk, 420 00:22:30,166 --> 00:22:33,166 safe talk that allows him to feel strong. 421 00:22:33,250 --> 00:22:35,250 Sometimes the weaker the person's constitution-- 422 00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:36,875 Is he going to kill me? 423 00:22:38,333 --> 00:22:40,959 Mary, I'm here because I don't know. 424 00:22:41,041 --> 00:22:42,583 I really don't think so, 425 00:22:43,166 --> 00:22:46,500 but you are the one person that knows him better than I do. 426 00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,542 I've never heard him talk like this, ever. 427 00:22:50,834 --> 00:22:52,125 Did you tell the police? 428 00:22:53,375 --> 00:22:56,333 Uh... It's tricky, Mrs. Stevens. 429 00:22:56,417 --> 00:22:58,542 This is doctor-patient privileged stuff. 430 00:22:58,625 --> 00:23:00,166 We shouldn't even be telling you this. 431 00:23:00,250 --> 00:23:02,083 He plans to kill me, for God's sake. 432 00:23:02,166 --> 00:23:05,333 Which is why we are telling you on the possibility that these threats-- 433 00:23:05,417 --> 00:23:06,417 I'm calling the police. 434 00:23:06,500 --> 00:23:09,583 I'm not sure that they could do anything at this point. 435 00:23:09,667 --> 00:23:12,000 I mean, they certainly can't arrest him for things 436 00:23:12,083 --> 00:23:14,041 he told a therapist in confidence. 437 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,333 What I would suggest, 438 00:23:16,417 --> 00:23:19,959 let Dr. Konigsberg continue to monitor the situation. 439 00:23:20,041 --> 00:23:22,250 He's seeing your ex-husband every day. 440 00:23:22,333 --> 00:23:25,083 If things progress further, we will call the police. 441 00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:28,625 In the meantime, maybe you could stay with a friend... 442 00:23:28,709 --> 00:23:31,583 -I have animals, I can't-- -...or get a friend to stay with you. 443 00:23:39,250 --> 00:23:42,208 I've been sitting in that chair as Santa for eight years 444 00:23:42,291 --> 00:23:44,166 and I have been an exemplary Santa. 445 00:23:44,875 --> 00:23:45,792 People will tell you, 446 00:23:45,875 --> 00:23:49,333 even if they don't shop at Gordon’s, they come to see me. 447 00:23:49,417 --> 00:23:52,458 For how many of those eight years have you been dressing as a woman? 448 00:23:53,166 --> 00:23:54,000 All of them. 449 00:23:54,083 --> 00:23:55,625 And in all this time, 450 00:23:55,709 --> 00:23:58,041 had your cross-dressing ever been an issue a work? 451 00:23:58,917 --> 00:24:01,458 No, I was always in the Santa costume. 452 00:24:01,542 --> 00:24:02,667 People never even knew. 453 00:24:02,750 --> 00:24:07,375 It was always my intention to keep my worlds separate. 454 00:24:07,458 --> 00:24:10,083 So it's been my secret. 455 00:24:10,709 --> 00:24:12,291 But your secret got out. 456 00:24:13,750 --> 00:24:17,125 Last week I had a boy in my lap, eight years old. 457 00:24:17,208 --> 00:24:18,917 I asked him what he wanted for Christmas. 458 00:24:19,542 --> 00:24:23,959 He said, "Santa, please make me normal." 459 00:24:24,917 --> 00:24:26,375 He was starting to cry as he said it. 460 00:24:26,458 --> 00:24:27,667 He said, "make me normal"? 461 00:24:27,750 --> 00:24:29,458 Yes, he said, um... 462 00:24:30,583 --> 00:24:31,709 He said he was sick. 463 00:24:31,792 --> 00:24:34,375 He said that he liked to wear girls' clothes, 464 00:24:34,458 --> 00:24:35,834 and he was sure he'd go to hell. 465 00:24:38,834 --> 00:24:43,542 And I said, "Son, you're not alone. 466 00:24:45,041 --> 00:24:46,417 And you're not sick." 467 00:24:48,041 --> 00:24:49,417 And I told him about me. 468 00:24:52,208 --> 00:24:53,250 Thank you, sir. 469 00:24:58,291 --> 00:25:02,250 So while on the job, you told an eight-year-old boy 470 00:25:02,709 --> 00:25:04,458 that Santa is a cross-dresser? 471 00:25:07,709 --> 00:25:08,542 Yes. 472 00:25:15,041 --> 00:25:16,834 -Did the judge rule? -No. 473 00:25:16,917 --> 00:25:19,375 Miraculously, I persuaded him to let me give a final statement 474 00:25:19,458 --> 00:25:21,125 though I have no idea what to say. 475 00:25:21,208 --> 00:25:24,083 The fact that he told a child he's a cross-dresser, 476 00:25:24,166 --> 00:25:26,625 I never should have put him on the stand. 477 00:25:26,709 --> 00:25:29,667 I've got to somehow make this a gay issue. 478 00:25:30,417 --> 00:25:33,208 Personally, I think you'll look very sexy in the elf outfit. 479 00:25:33,291 --> 00:25:35,083 I have no doubt, yet I don't wanna lose. 480 00:25:35,166 --> 00:25:37,000 I've grown attached to this Santa. 481 00:25:37,083 --> 00:25:39,208 Brad seems pretty happy. Does he have reason? 482 00:25:39,291 --> 00:25:43,083 Denny, you said if I ever had another Hail Mary emergency, 483 00:25:43,166 --> 00:25:44,709 -you'd make the call. -Really. 484 00:25:45,375 --> 00:25:46,333 Are you sure? 485 00:25:46,417 --> 00:25:47,834 I need you to make the call. 486 00:25:47,917 --> 00:25:50,000 -And what's this about? -It's extremely delicate. 487 00:25:50,083 --> 00:25:52,250 Though privilege typically extends to the whole firm, 488 00:25:52,333 --> 00:25:55,875 I have assured him that this would go no further than you and me. 489 00:25:55,959 --> 00:25:57,125 Okay. 490 00:25:57,709 --> 00:25:59,333 Meet Brian Stevens. 491 00:25:59,417 --> 00:26:01,083 Brian, this is the attorney I-- 492 00:26:04,166 --> 00:26:05,250 What's going on? 493 00:26:05,333 --> 00:26:07,709 -This is your client? -You're an attorney? 494 00:26:07,792 --> 00:26:09,458 Um... yes. 495 00:26:09,542 --> 00:26:10,875 You said you were a doctor! 496 00:26:11,458 --> 00:26:12,917 What the hell is going on? 497 00:26:13,917 --> 00:26:15,750 Uh, Paul, we have a conflict. 498 00:26:15,834 --> 00:26:19,083 I represent the therapist who was treating Mr. Stevens. 499 00:26:19,166 --> 00:26:21,000 She's the one who went to my ex-wife. 500 00:26:21,083 --> 00:26:23,917 She's the one who told Mary I planned on killing her. 501 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:25,417 She pretended to be a doctor! 502 00:26:40,125 --> 00:26:41,959 He can see you for about five minutes. 503 00:26:42,041 --> 00:26:44,750 -After that, his day is completely-- -Five minutes is more than enough. 504 00:26:45,291 --> 00:26:47,166 -You can go in. -Thank you. 505 00:26:51,083 --> 00:26:53,291 Thank you so much for agreeing to see me. 506 00:26:53,375 --> 00:26:54,959 My name is Alan Shore and I... 507 00:27:03,291 --> 00:27:05,458 -Go. -My name is Alan Shore. 508 00:27:05,542 --> 00:27:06,875 Perhaps you remember-- 509 00:27:08,709 --> 00:27:10,291 Everyone has a name, son. 510 00:27:10,625 --> 00:27:12,458 I'm not interested in yours. 511 00:27:12,542 --> 00:27:15,875 You have five minutes because you know him. 512 00:27:18,583 --> 00:27:19,500 Bill Clinton? 513 00:27:24,250 --> 00:27:28,291 Ah. Well, you'll remember at the behest of Mr. Crane, 514 00:27:28,375 --> 00:27:30,834 you made an appearance in one of my cases 515 00:27:30,917 --> 00:27:33,625 involving an African American Little Orphan Annie 516 00:27:33,709 --> 00:27:35,709 and you were extremely effective. 517 00:27:35,792 --> 00:27:39,166 "Give us a black Spider-Man, give us a black Superman 518 00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:41,875 who can leap tall buildings, all the big icons." 519 00:27:42,458 --> 00:27:44,125 Now I have another case 520 00:27:44,208 --> 00:27:47,417 featuring a gay man who's being discriminating against. 521 00:27:47,500 --> 00:27:49,000 And this one involves 522 00:27:49,083 --> 00:27:52,417 the biggest icon of them all, Santa Claus. 523 00:27:53,458 --> 00:27:55,709 My problem is the judge. 524 00:27:56,083 --> 00:28:00,125 His tiny brain has been calcified by intolerance. 525 00:28:00,208 --> 00:28:02,667 However, he's certainly a slave to public opinion 526 00:28:02,750 --> 00:28:04,250 as judges tend to be. 527 00:28:04,333 --> 00:28:08,000 But I can't really move the public. You can. 528 00:28:09,500 --> 00:28:11,166 Do you understand what I'm asking? 529 00:28:11,250 --> 00:28:13,208 You want me to be your rabbit? 530 00:28:13,291 --> 00:28:17,542 I want you to be Reverend Al Sharpton in all his massive glory. 531 00:28:17,625 --> 00:28:21,625 I want you to charge in there, say "Give us a gay Santa Claus" 532 00:28:21,709 --> 00:28:23,458 and button it with three "God Almighties." 533 00:28:23,542 --> 00:28:24,500 Stop. 534 00:28:26,250 --> 00:28:29,083 I don't do things big. I'm subtle. 535 00:28:29,166 --> 00:28:30,333 Yes. 536 00:28:30,875 --> 00:28:32,583 Three "God Almighties." 537 00:28:32,667 --> 00:28:35,417 Look, I've written it all out for you. 538 00:28:37,166 --> 00:28:38,917 Give that a look-see. 539 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:41,208 I've seen you move mountains, Reverend. 540 00:28:41,291 --> 00:28:45,208 I need you to move this one tiny-brain judge. 541 00:28:46,417 --> 00:28:47,375 Please. 542 00:28:51,125 --> 00:28:52,417 Pretty please. 543 00:28:55,083 --> 00:28:56,041 Denny Crane. 544 00:29:01,875 --> 00:29:03,458 You got Sharpton? 545 00:29:03,542 --> 00:29:05,166 I don't know. He said he'd think about it. 546 00:29:05,250 --> 00:29:07,667 Does he just do this kind of thing now, for lawyers? 547 00:29:07,750 --> 00:29:10,417 He does it for Denny. Let's hope he does it for me. 548 00:29:10,500 --> 00:29:11,709 All set? 549 00:29:14,041 --> 00:29:16,583 You don't want me to miss the ruling, do you? 550 00:29:17,750 --> 00:29:19,542 Got the costume. 551 00:29:29,625 --> 00:29:33,250 My God, to impersonate a doctor. 552 00:29:34,208 --> 00:29:36,083 I thought a human life was at stake 553 00:29:36,166 --> 00:29:38,583 -and I didn't know-- -It doesn't matter, Lori. 554 00:29:39,750 --> 00:29:42,125 You're suddenly going to start playing Solomon 555 00:29:42,208 --> 00:29:46,667 and break rules, sacred rules, whenever you see fit? 556 00:29:47,208 --> 00:29:49,417 I could be disbarred for this. 557 00:29:50,083 --> 00:29:51,709 You? Why? 558 00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:54,458 For not turning you in. 559 00:29:55,875 --> 00:29:57,792 I'm sorry, Paul, 560 00:29:57,875 --> 00:29:59,667 I just... I'm sorry. 561 00:30:00,208 --> 00:30:02,125 I think it's this Alan Shore character. 562 00:30:02,208 --> 00:30:03,333 Ever since he got here-- 563 00:30:03,417 --> 00:30:04,750 This has nothing to do with Alan Shore. 564 00:30:04,834 --> 00:30:06,375 I'm not influenced by him. 565 00:30:06,458 --> 00:30:08,417 You used to be influenced by me. 566 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:13,834 Tell me what you want me to do. 567 00:30:13,917 --> 00:30:17,709 I'll resign if... Just tell me what you want. 568 00:30:17,792 --> 00:30:20,500 First, I want you to apologize to Mr. Stevens. 569 00:30:20,583 --> 00:30:22,792 -I did that. -Well, you need to do it again, 570 00:30:22,875 --> 00:30:25,375 and hope to God he doesn't sue us. 571 00:30:32,083 --> 00:30:34,041 How long have you known this man, Paul? 572 00:30:34,125 --> 00:30:36,458 Years, only through work. 573 00:30:39,625 --> 00:30:42,542 But he doesn't strike me as being capable of violence, 574 00:30:42,625 --> 00:30:43,917 if that's what you're asking. 575 00:30:47,417 --> 00:30:48,875 I'll get him back in here. 576 00:30:49,458 --> 00:30:51,625 And on the chance that he could be violent... 577 00:30:52,375 --> 00:30:56,333 when you apologize, I will be in the room. 578 00:30:59,750 --> 00:31:02,291 And for the sake of humoring me, 579 00:31:03,834 --> 00:31:07,500 let's stay completely away from Alan Shore. 580 00:31:21,500 --> 00:31:22,959 What's all the media doing here? 581 00:31:23,542 --> 00:31:25,291 I have no idea. 582 00:31:25,375 --> 00:31:26,667 All rise. 583 00:31:29,542 --> 00:31:31,792 -Uh-oh. -What? 584 00:31:31,875 --> 00:31:33,458 We're ten minutes early. 585 00:31:45,208 --> 00:31:46,250 Please be seated. 586 00:31:50,667 --> 00:31:55,500 {\an8}Mr. Phillips, have you got anything to say before I listen to him? 587 00:31:59,083 --> 00:32:02,667 Mr. Furnald was fired mainly because my clients feared 588 00:32:02,750 --> 00:32:05,417 he'd share his secret proclivity with a child, 589 00:32:05,500 --> 00:32:09,583 which, by his own testimony, is exactly what he did. 590 00:32:15,792 --> 00:32:18,375 I object to that summation. It was entirely too short. 591 00:32:18,959 --> 00:32:21,083 -What? -I'm only worried for you, Your Honor. 592 00:32:21,166 --> 00:32:23,208 If you're inclined to rule against us, 593 00:32:23,291 --> 00:32:26,500 he's got to at least give you a good argument to hang your hat on. 594 00:32:26,583 --> 00:32:29,917 So it looks good to all this... media. 595 00:32:31,083 --> 00:32:32,959 Did you notice the media here? 596 00:32:34,333 --> 00:32:35,291 Are you on drugs? 597 00:32:36,041 --> 00:32:38,000 You've got 30 seconds. 598 00:32:38,083 --> 00:32:39,625 That's what I was afraid of. 599 00:32:43,041 --> 00:32:44,667 Your honor, the child in question, 600 00:32:44,750 --> 00:32:46,959 who my client shared his secret with, 601 00:32:47,041 --> 00:32:48,458 that child was in pain. 602 00:32:49,041 --> 00:32:53,250 Being a good Santa Claus, Gil Furnald sought to relieve that pain. 603 00:32:53,333 --> 00:32:56,125 By telling him he was a homosexual? 604 00:32:56,208 --> 00:32:57,750 Those three little words again. 605 00:32:59,834 --> 00:33:01,875 He did not tell the boy he was gay. 606 00:33:01,959 --> 00:33:04,250 He only said that he also liked to dress in female attire... 607 00:33:04,333 --> 00:33:05,709 Why does he keep looking back here? 608 00:33:06,917 --> 00:33:08,041 I have no idea. 609 00:33:08,125 --> 00:33:11,291 He encouraged the boy not to feel that he was sick. 610 00:33:11,375 --> 00:33:13,667 He urged him not to feel alone. 611 00:33:13,750 --> 00:33:15,542 It was a one-time occurrence 612 00:33:15,625 --> 00:33:18,750 strictly intended to speak to the heart of this one child. 613 00:33:19,166 --> 00:33:22,834 There is no evidence that this man has committed any wrongdoing, 614 00:33:22,917 --> 00:33:24,875 nor is there any compelling evidence 615 00:33:24,959 --> 00:33:26,709 that cross-dressers are inherently lascivious, 616 00:33:26,792 --> 00:33:27,917 and the defendant knows that. 617 00:33:28,500 --> 00:33:30,125 Cross-dressing is but a pretext 618 00:33:30,208 --> 00:33:33,458 that the defendant has hung its hat on to disguise the fact 619 00:33:33,542 --> 00:33:36,417 that Gil Furnald was terminated because he is gay. 620 00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:39,125 Last time I checked, it was not a firing offense for a civilian 621 00:33:39,208 --> 00:33:41,041 to be either ho, mo, or sexual. 622 00:33:41,125 --> 00:33:42,750 All right, already, I've heard enough. 623 00:33:42,834 --> 00:33:44,834 -I'm going to rule on this. -You can't rule yet. 624 00:33:44,917 --> 00:33:46,917 -Why not? -I don't know. 625 00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:47,959 Well... 626 00:33:48,041 --> 00:33:51,458 ...what if, say, some big celebrity were to come charging through the door? 627 00:33:52,291 --> 00:33:54,291 Sorry I'm late, judge, I'll make this quick... 628 00:33:54,375 --> 00:33:55,208 And subtle. 629 00:33:56,291 --> 00:33:57,667 Who the hell are you? 630 00:33:57,750 --> 00:34:02,000 The image of Santa Claus has been crafted for hundreds and hundreds 631 00:34:02,083 --> 00:34:03,542 and hundreds of years. 632 00:34:03,625 --> 00:34:05,625 We're supposed to be in a different day. 633 00:34:05,709 --> 00:34:09,250 Give the world a black Santa Claus. 634 00:34:09,333 --> 00:34:13,625 Let the people have an African American come down the chimney, 635 00:34:13,709 --> 00:34:15,709 bearing joy and good will. 636 00:34:15,792 --> 00:34:17,417 Gay, not black. 637 00:34:19,166 --> 00:34:21,500 The prejudice against gay people must stop. 638 00:34:21,583 --> 00:34:27,291 We all say we're for gay rights, we all say we accept homosexuality. 639 00:34:27,375 --> 00:34:29,750 But give a gay man a hug, sit in his lap... 640 00:34:29,834 --> 00:34:32,709 -Who is this man? -Let the bells of tolerance 641 00:34:32,792 --> 00:34:34,291 ring out this Christmas. 642 00:34:34,375 --> 00:34:39,375 Let people open their minds as they open their presents underneath the tree. 643 00:34:39,458 --> 00:34:41,250 We need your mind, judge, today. 644 00:34:41,333 --> 00:34:45,417 Let the gay man be my brother, be your brother 645 00:34:45,834 --> 00:34:49,583 be the schoolteacher, be the construction worker. 646 00:34:49,667 --> 00:34:53,917 Give the world a gay Santa Claus, God Almighty, 647 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,041 God Almighty, God Almighty. 648 00:34:56,125 --> 00:34:59,792 Leave out the cookies and the milk this Christmas Eve 649 00:34:59,875 --> 00:35:04,834 for a holly jolly homosexual, God Almighty. 650 00:35:04,917 --> 00:35:05,792 And cut. 651 00:35:13,875 --> 00:35:15,291 I threw in one extra. 652 00:35:15,375 --> 00:35:16,375 Thank you. 653 00:35:19,667 --> 00:35:20,500 ♪ Ah ♪ 654 00:35:20,583 --> 00:35:22,583 ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪ 655 00:35:22,667 --> 00:35:24,542 ♪ Jingle all the way ♪ 656 00:35:24,875 --> 00:35:26,875 ♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride ♪ 657 00:35:26,959 --> 00:35:30,583 ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪ 658 00:35:42,625 --> 00:35:45,417 One of the reasons why I've been such an even-tempered businessman 659 00:35:45,500 --> 00:35:47,333 is because I've been able to find an outlet. 660 00:35:47,417 --> 00:35:50,834 A safe confidential outlet with my therapist. 661 00:35:50,917 --> 00:35:53,959 But you must admit, threatening to kill your ex-wife like this, it is-- 662 00:35:54,041 --> 00:35:56,667 Ms. Colson, I've been in therapy since I was 16. 663 00:35:56,750 --> 00:35:59,250 I spent most of those sessions planning on how to kill my father. 664 00:35:59,333 --> 00:36:00,750 They're rants. 665 00:36:00,834 --> 00:36:02,417 They help me get the anger out. 666 00:36:03,125 --> 00:36:05,041 This is going to ruin me. 667 00:36:05,667 --> 00:36:07,875 Mary acts on hysteria. 668 00:36:07,959 --> 00:36:11,500 She's going to panic and this is going to get out. 669 00:36:12,083 --> 00:36:13,792 Let us talk to Mary. 670 00:36:13,875 --> 00:36:15,667 Perhaps we can settle her down. 671 00:36:16,417 --> 00:36:19,667 I'll lose my job if this goes public. 672 00:36:19,750 --> 00:36:22,792 Let us try to unring this bell a little. 673 00:36:23,542 --> 00:36:24,458 Okay. 674 00:36:29,166 --> 00:36:30,667 We need to fix this. 675 00:36:31,500 --> 00:36:33,083 -How? -We go to the wife 676 00:36:33,166 --> 00:36:35,375 and we explain that you overreacted. 677 00:36:35,458 --> 00:36:36,917 She saw the tape for herself, Paul. 678 00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,917 -It's not gonna-- -We further explain that people say things 679 00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,625 -to their therapists that sometimes-- -We did that. 680 00:36:42,709 --> 00:36:44,709 Well, we'll do it again. Where does she live? 681 00:36:44,792 --> 00:36:46,083 Weston. 682 00:36:46,166 --> 00:36:47,667 We'll leave here at 5:00. 683 00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:11,667 I don't wanna talk about it. 684 00:37:15,083 --> 00:37:16,166 You won? 685 00:37:16,250 --> 00:37:18,750 Judge Hingham, horror that he is, bowed to public sentiment 686 00:37:18,834 --> 00:37:20,834 and reinstated Gil as Santa. 687 00:37:24,458 --> 00:37:26,291 And if you don't mind, 688 00:37:26,375 --> 00:37:28,834 I would like to get back to work as soon as I can. 689 00:37:28,917 --> 00:37:31,792 Could I steal you for just a minute in private? 690 00:37:32,375 --> 00:37:33,291 Sure. 691 00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:36,917 Ha. 692 00:37:42,875 --> 00:37:44,667 Listen, um... 693 00:37:45,542 --> 00:37:46,375 Thank you 694 00:37:46,959 --> 00:37:49,083 not just for getting my job back but... 695 00:37:49,709 --> 00:37:51,750 well, it's not often that you meet a lawyer 696 00:37:51,834 --> 00:37:53,583 with a soft spot for cross-dressers. 697 00:37:54,166 --> 00:37:55,792 Well, now you have, Mr. Furnald. 698 00:37:56,417 --> 00:37:57,875 It wasn't that so much. 699 00:37:57,959 --> 00:38:02,041 It's just from everything I've heard, you are a magnificent Santa Claus. 700 00:38:04,083 --> 00:38:06,959 -Thank you. -You're quite welcome. 701 00:38:20,500 --> 00:38:22,917 I guess you should take the lead with her since you know her. 702 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:24,291 I also know her lawyer. 703 00:38:24,375 --> 00:38:27,083 All I can say is I hope she hasn't contacted him yet. 704 00:38:27,166 --> 00:38:28,917 Because if he should get a hold of this... 705 00:38:30,208 --> 00:38:31,125 What the... 706 00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:40,208 Oh, Dear God, no. 707 00:38:56,917 --> 00:38:57,750 What happened? 708 00:38:57,834 --> 00:38:59,959 Homicide. The ex-husband just showed up and... 709 00:39:00,041 --> 00:39:02,208 -Where is he? -He's represented. 710 00:39:02,792 --> 00:39:04,166 I don't think a lawyer's going to help him, counsel. 711 00:39:04,250 --> 00:39:05,709 I want to speak with him. 712 00:39:05,792 --> 00:39:07,500 I don't think that's going to happen, either. 713 00:39:07,583 --> 00:39:08,625 He's over there. 714 00:39:14,458 --> 00:39:16,333 What-- what happened? 715 00:39:17,542 --> 00:39:20,667 He showed up. She says he came here to kill her. 716 00:39:20,750 --> 00:39:22,625 Said she fired in self-defense. 717 00:39:33,458 --> 00:39:34,500 Mary. 718 00:39:39,792 --> 00:39:41,417 Am I going to need a lawyer? 719 00:39:43,750 --> 00:39:44,834 What happened? 720 00:39:44,917 --> 00:39:46,083 He showed up, 721 00:39:48,083 --> 00:39:49,291 said we needed to talk. 722 00:39:50,500 --> 00:39:53,083 I didn't trust it, you know, after what I saw on that tape. 723 00:39:55,000 --> 00:39:57,875 I got the gun out of the drawer, told him to leave. 724 00:39:58,208 --> 00:39:59,834 He said he just wanted to talk. 725 00:40:00,959 --> 00:40:02,333 I told him, "get out." 726 00:40:04,875 --> 00:40:07,333 And then he started walking toward me. 727 00:40:08,583 --> 00:40:09,875 And you shot him. 728 00:40:13,709 --> 00:40:15,750 He was going to kill me, right? 729 00:40:17,917 --> 00:40:19,208 You told me. 730 00:40:20,917 --> 00:40:22,834 He was going to strangle me. 731 00:40:26,208 --> 00:40:27,792 Promise me I had to do it. 732 00:40:29,709 --> 00:40:31,083 Promise me. 733 00:40:55,750 --> 00:40:57,083 Next on Boston Legal... 734 00:40:57,166 --> 00:40:58,917 -I'm uncomfortable working with Tara. -Because? 735 00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:00,667 I used to sleep with Alan Shore and now she does. 736 00:41:00,750 --> 00:41:01,792 And she wants to. 737 00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:03,333 I do not. 738 00:41:03,417 --> 00:41:06,041 I'll ask the questions this afternoon. 739 00:41:06,125 --> 00:41:07,792 -I'm questioning the doctor. -No, you aren't. 740 00:41:07,875 --> 00:41:08,834 -Yes, I am. -No. 741 00:41:09,875 --> 00:41:11,208 You'll need to open your briefcase, sir. 742 00:41:11,291 --> 00:41:12,125 Alan! 743 00:41:15,250 --> 00:41:16,291 Alan! 56544

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