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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,975 ♪ 2 00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:09,343 All right, keep your wits about you. 3 00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,045 If that trader's right, 4 00:00:11,045 --> 00:00:12,413 we may have finally tracked down 5 00:00:12,413 --> 00:00:13,947 Cole Younger. 6 00:00:13,947 --> 00:00:16,183 I just need to find Cole Younger. 7 00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:17,951 I know, I know what you're trying to do. 8 00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:19,119 It's been a while, though. 9 00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:21,322 The town's gonna turn on us, Eli. 10 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:25,292 What happened here? 11 00:00:25,292 --> 00:00:31,865 ♪ 12 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,000 Wow. 13 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:34,468 Well, that trapper was right. 14 00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:36,970 Cole Younger's camp was hidden right here. 15 00:00:36,970 --> 00:00:38,839 But obviously, somebody got here 16 00:00:38,839 --> 00:00:41,141 before us. 17 00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:42,810 Here's Red. 18 00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:45,479 Oh no, they tore his brain clean out 19 00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:48,282 and fed it to him, look at that! 20 00:00:48,282 --> 00:00:50,984 It's not just that these men were killed, 21 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,220 somebody really wanted them to pay. 22 00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,122 Look at this. 23 00:00:55,122 --> 00:00:56,890 Burned to death. 24 00:00:58,225 --> 00:01:00,928 Oh, it's like a barbecue from hell. 25 00:01:00,928 --> 00:01:02,262 Smells like chicken. 26 00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:03,864 Doesn't it? 27 00:01:03,864 --> 00:01:06,266 What group is badder 28 00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:08,769 and nastier than the Cole Younger gang? 29 00:01:08,769 --> 00:01:12,539 Prairie Witches, Cougar Devils, 30 00:01:12,539 --> 00:01:14,041 Plain Demons. 31 00:01:14,041 --> 00:01:17,211 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 32 00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:19,813 What the hell is that? 33 00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:31,225 ♪ 34 00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:32,960 Hi sheriff. 35 00:01:34,828 --> 00:01:40,901 ♪ 36 00:01:41,335 --> 00:01:44,471 Ahh! 37 00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:45,539 Stop it! 38 00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:48,242 Do not ever do that! 39 00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:49,276 Me, Ephraim Younger, 40 00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:50,978 my brother tried to kill you. 41 00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:52,312 -Ephraim? -Yeah. 42 00:01:52,312 --> 00:01:54,081 -Hi Olly. -Eli. 43 00:01:54,081 --> 00:01:55,215 Yeah, whatever. 44 00:01:55,215 --> 00:01:56,417 What happened? 45 00:01:56,417 --> 00:01:58,118 Sam Starr happened, Sheriff. 46 00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,220 -Who's that? -You don't know Sam Starr? 47 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:02,790 No, I just said I don't know them. 48 00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:04,858 I was saying that for a dramatic build, Sheriff. 49 00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:06,360 You should let him have a dramatic build. 50 00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:07,828 Fine, build, build! 51 00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:09,129 No, who, what? 52 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:10,264 Who did this? 53 00:02:10,264 --> 00:02:12,299 Sam Starr did this, Sheriff. 54 00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:13,867 -There you go. -I appreciate the gasp, 55 00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:15,903 because it is a gasp-worthy name. 56 00:02:15,903 --> 00:02:17,805 Tell me who he is! 57 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,440 Sam Starr is the worst man in the west. 58 00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:21,074 Worse than your brother, Cole? 59 00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:22,476 My brother Cole is a gentle 60 00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:24,278 summer's breeze in compared 61 00:02:24,278 --> 00:02:26,180 to the hail storm that is Sam Starr. 62 00:02:26,180 --> 00:02:28,315 Okay, now that's a big disparity. 63 00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:30,083 That's like saying... 64 00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:32,786 he's so bad he's the devil himself. 65 00:02:32,786 --> 00:02:34,054 Real fast. 66 00:02:34,054 --> 00:02:35,189 Does everyone see what I look like? 67 00:02:35,189 --> 00:02:36,290 -Okay. -He runs with a clan, 68 00:02:36,290 --> 00:02:37,825 they're all Cherokee. 69 00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:38,959 Some are half-breed, some are full-breed, 70 00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,260 some are three quarter breed. 71 00:02:40,260 --> 00:02:41,495 There's a lot of mixing going on. 72 00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:43,530 Anyhow, they're all bad. 73 00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:45,065 They came in here and they just 74 00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:46,200 started cutting... 75 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,368 Faces, hands, you name it. 76 00:02:48,368 --> 00:02:50,070 Feeding pieces to people, 77 00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:51,972 feeding other people to other people. 78 00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:53,040 And you see the horror show 79 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:54,241 that's over there. 80 00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:55,542 Sam wears ears around his neck 81 00:02:55,542 --> 00:02:56,777 on a string. 82 00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,245 -Ugh. -Yeah. 83 00:02:58,245 --> 00:03:00,848 On a count of he knows Cole shot Belle Starr. 84 00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:02,449 Belle Starr was my wife. 85 00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:04,051 Your brother killed my wife! 86 00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:05,752 Sam Starr did not take kindly to that, 87 00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:06,753 and he has been hunting us 88 00:03:06,753 --> 00:03:08,055 for two years now 89 00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,423 because he wanted to avenge 90 00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:12,125 your wife, Belle Starr's, death. 91 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:15,896 Wait, so Sam is Pearl Starr's father? 92 00:03:15,896 --> 00:03:16,997 No, no, no, no. 93 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:19,032 Cole is Pearl Starr's father. 94 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:20,767 He told us that! 95 00:03:20,767 --> 00:03:23,437 Sam is Pearl Starr's stepfather. 96 00:03:23,437 --> 00:03:25,272 -Correct. -Another stepfather? 97 00:03:25,272 --> 00:03:27,040 Yes. 98 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,543 Which means that he's my stepfather in-law. 99 00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,478 I'm your stepfather in-law! 100 00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:32,813 Why is that important? 101 00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:34,081 It's important! 102 00:03:34,081 --> 00:03:35,382 Where the hell is your brother? 103 00:03:35,382 --> 00:03:36,884 He escaped as per usual. 104 00:03:36,884 --> 00:03:38,352 He's like a magician. 105 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,953 It's like, "Hey, don't look over here." 106 00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:41,221 Gone! 107 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:42,556 Look at this one, look at this one. 108 00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,358 This one's Ephraim. 109 00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,460 Tarred, feathered, tree-tied. 110 00:03:46,460 --> 00:03:49,229 I hate to add to the bad news, 111 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,765 but you're under arrest for kidnapping him. 112 00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:52,766 Well, you wanna maybe help me 113 00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:53,967 get out of this thing? 114 00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:54,968 Do you have it everywhere? 115 00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,103 Even up in your... 116 00:03:56,103 --> 00:03:57,771 -Yes! -Oh God! 117 00:03:57,771 --> 00:03:59,373 They were very thorough. 118 00:03:59,373 --> 00:04:01,008 ♪ 119 00:04:01,008 --> 00:04:04,177 So Sam has been carrying a torch for Belle. 120 00:04:04,177 --> 00:04:06,113 When Cole murdered her, 121 00:04:06,113 --> 00:04:07,447 Sam found out about it 122 00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:09,883 and has been tracking us for years. 123 00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:11,451 I got to give you a word of warning, 124 00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:12,486 Sam Starr is not the kind of man 125 00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:13,954 you can handle. 126 00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:15,289 Your Harvard learning's not gonna matter 127 00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:17,057 two things when he's got your ears 128 00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:18,859 around his neck on a string. 129 00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:20,460 And this is your stepfather? 130 00:04:20,460 --> 00:04:21,862 -Yup. -Are there any other 131 00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:23,163 stepfathers I should know about? 132 00:04:23,163 --> 00:04:24,464 I don't know. 133 00:04:24,464 --> 00:04:26,033 God, I just hate this about you, Pearl. 134 00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:27,467 Things just keep being revealed, 135 00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:29,202 being revealed, being revealed! 136 00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:31,939 I need segue, I need transition. 137 00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,207 Instead of just being surprised all the time. 138 00:04:34,207 --> 00:04:36,810 I'm sorry, let me pull out my family tree 139 00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:37,811 and look through it 140 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:38,812 and read off the names. 141 00:04:38,812 --> 00:04:39,880 Oh wait, I can't read 142 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,181 so I can't do that. 143 00:04:41,181 --> 00:04:43,116 See that, the literacy thing really is 144 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,384 becoming a problem. 145 00:04:44,384 --> 00:04:45,819 I may be alone in this, 146 00:04:45,819 --> 00:04:47,788 but I think women should be taught to read. 147 00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,389 -No. -Yes! 148 00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:51,325 And even to vote someday! 149 00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:53,360 -What? -Oh, come on! 150 00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:54,428 Yes, it also would be nice if they 151 00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:55,495 were dressed in clothing 152 00:04:55,495 --> 00:04:59,132 that they could do stuff in. 153 00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,134 I wanna find your brother 154 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,170 so I can kill or incarcerate him. 155 00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:04,304 -No offense. -It's fine. 156 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,872 Then once I get him, 157 00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:08,842 I'll track down step daddy number one, 158 00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,144 Sam, and I'll kill or incarcerate him. 159 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:12,512 -No offense. -It's fine. 160 00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:14,214 How can I find your brother? 161 00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:15,749 I tell you where my brother is, 162 00:05:15,749 --> 00:05:16,984 you let me go. 163 00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:18,118 Tell you what... 164 00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:19,987 you give me information about Cole, 165 00:05:19,987 --> 00:05:21,989 if I get him, I will consider 166 00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:23,256 taking it easy on you. 167 00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:24,825 This is the face you will see 168 00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:27,260 if your information turns out to be good. 169 00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:29,830 All right, that's considerate. 170 00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:30,897 Okay. 171 00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:32,399 Cole is with the widow Webb. 172 00:05:32,399 --> 00:05:34,234 Wait a minute, Cole Younger 173 00:05:34,234 --> 00:05:36,870 is with Livinia Webb-Dunlop-Doe? 174 00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:39,172 Off and on for years. 175 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:42,075 That makes me mad! 176 00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:45,012 We're going to Livinia Webb-Dunlop-Doe's house, 177 00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:46,346 put him in jail. 178 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,381 You'll stay in there until I find out 179 00:05:47,381 --> 00:05:48,915 if this is true. 180 00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:50,083 I wanna see some of that consideration. 181 00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:52,019 -Watch. -I'll buy that. 182 00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:53,153 Okay, put him in. 183 00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:54,488 Is there any other big thing 184 00:05:54,488 --> 00:05:55,756 that I should know about? 185 00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:56,823 Are you a man? 186 00:05:56,823 --> 00:05:58,792 No, I'm not a man. 187 00:05:58,792 --> 00:05:59,893 Let's go! 188 00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:01,261 Livinia's house! 189 00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:02,462 I'm not a man! 190 00:06:02,462 --> 00:06:04,264 I know you're not. 191 00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:10,170 ♪ 192 00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:11,438 Hello, Livinia. 193 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:13,006 Hands up. 194 00:06:13,006 --> 00:06:14,441 Turn around. 195 00:06:14,441 --> 00:06:16,276 Take a seat, please. 196 00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:17,778 What's happening? 197 00:06:17,778 --> 00:06:19,212 The law is happenin'. 198 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,114 The law is happenin'. 199 00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:23,316 A whole lot of law is happenin'. 200 00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,951 A whole lot. 201 00:06:24,951 --> 00:06:26,053 It's too much. 202 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,320 -Really? -Yeah. 203 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:28,488 I thought I was just backing you up. 204 00:06:28,488 --> 00:06:29,890 Not on everything. 205 00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:31,458 I'll tap you each time. 206 00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:33,226 Hoyle, what are you doing here?! 207 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:35,896 Okay, you stay right where you are. 208 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,230 Where you are! 209 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:38,465 Or like a, "Yeah, where you are." 210 00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:39,466 Oh, yeah, okay. 211 00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,201 Yeah...where you are. 212 00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:42,436 Perfect. 213 00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:50,043 We have received information 214 00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,878 from an anonymous source 215 00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:54,881 that you have been regularly copulating 216 00:06:54,881 --> 00:06:56,383 with one Cole Younger 217 00:06:56,383 --> 00:06:59,286 behind my back here in this cabin, 218 00:06:59,286 --> 00:07:00,420 no doubt. 219 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,422 Probably his gun still holstered 220 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,924 on his body 221 00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,425 while he took your femininity. 222 00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,494 Yeah, huge, huge member. 223 00:07:07,494 --> 00:07:09,196 Huge! How do we know that? 224 00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:11,264 Because we saw him copulating 225 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:12,933 with my girlfriend! 226 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,801 Like a cucumber in heat. 227 00:07:14,801 --> 00:07:16,269 Bigger than a cucumber. 228 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:19,039 You have really thought this out. 229 00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:20,373 Well... 230 00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:21,775 then where is he? 231 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,243 Not here! 232 00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:24,311 Then I guess you don't mind 233 00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:25,512 if we take a look around. 234 00:07:25,512 --> 00:07:27,514 Yes, actually, I do mind. 235 00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:29,983 You are the bane of my existence, Hoyle. 236 00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:33,019 Oh-ho, what is this? 237 00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:34,187 A receipt. 238 00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:35,856 A receipt from Hamilton's 239 00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:38,225 Fine Dresses and Hosiery. 240 00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:39,826 I bought a dress. 241 00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:40,894 Oh, really? 242 00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:43,430 Size 14? 243 00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,965 Yes! 244 00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,066 You don't look like the type of lady 245 00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,868 who wears a size 14 dress. 246 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:49,369 -Well, I am. -Check her tag. 247 00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:50,837 Don't touch me! 248 00:07:50,837 --> 00:07:52,939 ♪ 249 00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:54,274 Get off of me right now! 250 00:07:54,274 --> 00:07:57,043 Just as I expected, it's a zero! 251 00:07:57,043 --> 00:07:58,812 You know what? 252 00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:00,947 A size 14 would perfectly fit 253 00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:03,517 one Cole Younger, wouldn't he? 254 00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:05,786 Question is, why would Cole Younger 255 00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:08,388 be wearing a size 14 dress... 256 00:08:08,388 --> 00:08:12,325 ♪ 257 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,528 Thank you, Harvard. 258 00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:20,901 San Francisky. 259 00:08:20,901 --> 00:08:22,235 Stage coach. 260 00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:23,937 Cape of Good Hope. 261 00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,438 3:10 pm. 262 00:08:25,438 --> 00:08:27,007 Oh, it's all so clear now. 263 00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,175 So clear. 264 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:30,043 Your lover, Cole Younger, 265 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,212 is so terrified of Sam Starr 266 00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:33,480 and the Starr Clan, 267 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,882 he has disguised himself as a women, 268 00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:37,984 he's caught the 3:30 stage coach 269 00:08:37,984 --> 00:08:40,253 to San Francisky where he will catch, 270 00:08:40,253 --> 00:08:43,456 no doubt, a steamboat to the Cape of Good Hope. 271 00:08:43,456 --> 00:08:45,492 Eli, you take Livinia to jail. 272 00:08:45,492 --> 00:08:47,260 What am I going to jail for? 273 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:49,830 Aiding and embedding a known outlaw 274 00:08:49,830 --> 00:08:52,032 and copulating with him also. 275 00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:53,166 You drop her at the jail, 276 00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:54,768 meet me at the stage coach. 277 00:08:54,768 --> 00:08:55,869 I'll go intercept him. 278 00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,204 I'll see you in a bit. 279 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,305 Everybody knows what they're doing. 280 00:08:58,305 --> 00:08:59,840 I know what I'm doing! 281 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:00,907 He's good when he thinks quickly. 282 00:09:00,907 --> 00:09:02,776 Excuse me, Livinia. 283 00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:04,377 I should probably take this for evidence. 284 00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:06,012 I'm gonna leave the pencil. 285 00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,180 Okay. 286 00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:09,115 3:10 coach, see you in a bit! 287 00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:31,204 ♪ 288 00:09:31,204 --> 00:09:32,839 Ah! 289 00:09:32,839 --> 00:09:35,075 ♪ 290 00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,843 Oh! 291 00:09:36,843 --> 00:09:37,944 Is it a stick up? 292 00:09:37,944 --> 00:09:39,813 No, no, excuse me, ladies. 293 00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:41,047 I'm sorry, I was a little late 294 00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:42,949 for the stage coach. 295 00:09:42,949 --> 00:09:45,218 Just give me a second. 296 00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:46,786 That was a lot harder than I thought. 297 00:09:46,786 --> 00:09:48,088 My heart... 298 00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:50,323 I may vomit. 299 00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:51,992 Just, yup. 300 00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:55,962 ♪ 301 00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:59,032 Eli! 302 00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,467 I can't believe he just left us here. 303 00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:02,002 I know, it's truly dastardly. 304 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:03,336 I mean, when's he coming back? 305 00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,372 Who knows? They might be gone for days. 306 00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:06,873 For days? 307 00:10:06,873 --> 00:10:08,174 Well, technically we're not alone 308 00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:09,743 'cause I have you and you have me. 309 00:10:09,743 --> 00:10:12,512 I meant alone together. 310 00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:14,514 But yes. 311 00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:16,416 How did Hoyle know that Cole and I 312 00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:17,417 have been having relations 313 00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:18,785 all this time? 314 00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,787 Wow, that's just gonna be 315 00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:22,022 one of those questions. 316 00:10:22,022 --> 00:10:24,257 It's an egg/chicken situation. 317 00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:29,329 ♪ 318 00:10:29,329 --> 00:10:30,797 Okay. 319 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,132 You know how you always feel better 320 00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,199 after you let it go. 321 00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:34,367 Never hold it in. 322 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:36,069 What is your name? 323 00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:37,804 I'm Ms. Erin Ferguson. 324 00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:39,172 -You're Irish. -I am. 325 00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:40,941 You know what they say about the Irish? 326 00:10:40,941 --> 00:10:43,977 -No. -Lots of stuff. 327 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:46,146 And what are your plans in San Francisky? 328 00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:49,749 My grandmother, she has the gout. 329 00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:51,251 The disease of the kings. 330 00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:52,519 Her toe just fell off. 331 00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:53,920 Oh yeah. 332 00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,488 I am missing both of my big toes. 333 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:56,923 -Really? -Yeah. 334 00:10:56,923 --> 00:10:58,391 It was a college prank gone wrong. 335 00:10:58,391 --> 00:11:00,260 I went to Harvard. 336 00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:02,829 -Fascinating! -Yes! 337 00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:04,197 And you are? 338 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:05,231 Oh, she's in mourning. 339 00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:06,499 I'm worried about her. 340 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,034 She hasn't said a peep since Great Bend. 341 00:11:08,034 --> 00:11:10,971 Oh, hasn't showed herself at all, 342 00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:12,372 hasn't said a peep. 343 00:11:12,372 --> 00:11:14,941 Huh. 344 00:11:14,941 --> 00:11:16,176 Can't believe they would leave a man 345 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:17,410 and a woman together 346 00:11:17,410 --> 00:11:19,913 in a prison cell. 347 00:11:19,913 --> 00:11:21,881 It evokes an image of Adam and Eve 348 00:11:21,881 --> 00:11:23,183 in the Garden of Eden. 349 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:26,386 Just two people with nothing but time. 350 00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:28,455 A lesser man might just, you know, 351 00:11:28,455 --> 00:11:29,990 toss you up against that wall, 352 00:11:29,990 --> 00:11:31,358 maybe try a little slap and tickle, 353 00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:33,293 just sort of see what works. 354 00:11:33,293 --> 00:11:35,528 Well, it's a good thing that's not 355 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:36,830 gonna happen. 356 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:38,431 Not gonna happen at all. 357 00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:42,802 ♪ 358 00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:44,838 I'm actually after an outlaw. 359 00:11:44,838 --> 00:11:48,141 -Oh really? -Yes, that's my job. 360 00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:49,275 I search out outlaws. 361 00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:50,276 You like that? 362 00:11:50,276 --> 00:11:51,811 The ladies seem to like that. 363 00:11:51,811 --> 00:11:53,346 And you know, with my training 364 00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:54,381 in criminology, 365 00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:56,516 I can track criminals. 366 00:11:56,516 --> 00:11:59,986 You know, they always leave a trail. 367 00:11:59,986 --> 00:12:01,388 It's science that does it. 368 00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:04,257 If 'P' then 'Q'. 369 00:12:04,257 --> 00:12:05,525 Okay, you guys wouldn't know 370 00:12:05,525 --> 00:12:07,927 'cause you're not educated. 371 00:12:07,927 --> 00:12:09,262 I'm very impressed. 372 00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:10,463 You all right? 373 00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:13,066 You need a hanky? 374 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,534 Wait a minute, you've got a little... 375 00:12:14,534 --> 00:12:15,935 a little something-- 376 00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:17,270 Ha-ha-ha! 377 00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:18,772 Cole Younger! 378 00:12:18,772 --> 00:12:30,517 ♪ 379 00:12:30,517 --> 00:12:32,218 -Sheriff! -Where'd he go? 380 00:12:32,218 --> 00:13:15,061 ♪ 381 00:13:15,061 --> 00:13:17,063 -Howdy, ma'am. -Howdy! 382 00:13:17,063 --> 00:13:20,567 ♪ 383 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:22,802 -Hey Hoyle! -Eli! 384 00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:26,172 Get up here now! 385 00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:28,575 I don't know how to get up there. 386 00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:29,809 Ma'am, you don't happen to have 387 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,144 a gun on you, do you? 388 00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:32,312 I'm sorry. 389 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,880 Not a Derringer or anything? 390 00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:35,381 I wish I could help. 391 00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:36,816 Excuse me! 392 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:38,284 ♪ 393 00:13:38,284 --> 00:13:40,420 Get up here! 394 00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:42,455 Okay, how did he get in there, by the way? 395 00:13:42,455 --> 00:13:43,523 Oh, he climbed through the window. 396 00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:44,958 Would you like to come in 397 00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:46,126 through the window and sit with me? 398 00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:48,328 No, I'm married. 399 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:49,996 To a whore, though. 400 00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:52,098 ♪ 401 00:13:52,098 --> 00:13:53,500 Hey Hoyle! 402 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:56,536 -What are you doing? -Get up here now! 403 00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:59,005 You're not helping anyone! 404 00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:02,375 ♪ 405 00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:03,409 Hoyle, I'm coming. 406 00:14:03,409 --> 00:14:04,944 Hurry up! 407 00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:07,180 ♪ 408 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,082 I'm gonna take you, 409 00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:11,384 I'm gonna carve you up. 410 00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:15,889 ♪ 411 00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:23,029 ♪ 412 00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:24,330 See this? 413 00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:26,966 Maybe I'll just cut your nose off. 414 00:14:26,966 --> 00:14:29,135 What do you think of that? 415 00:14:29,135 --> 00:14:30,870 And your lips? 416 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:33,173 I'm gonna stick you like a pig! 417 00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:35,909 Here's how we fight in Harvard! 418 00:14:39,779 --> 00:14:41,114 Good Lord, when are they 419 00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:42,282 coming back? 420 00:14:42,282 --> 00:14:43,783 Could be days. 421 00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:45,151 Just run away when trouble happens. 422 00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:46,452 He does really beat it. 423 00:14:46,452 --> 00:14:48,454 Yeah. 424 00:14:48,454 --> 00:14:50,056 Do you know that he, 425 00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:53,793 after all this time, will not marry me 426 00:14:53,793 --> 00:14:55,795 because he thinks I have a curse? 427 00:14:55,795 --> 00:14:56,930 A curse? 428 00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:58,831 Because all my husbands die. 429 00:14:58,831 --> 00:15:00,366 Well, Cole killed two of those husbands. 430 00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:01,935 He sure did! 431 00:15:01,935 --> 00:15:05,338 So, your curse might be Cole. 432 00:15:05,338 --> 00:15:07,207 I never thought of that. 433 00:15:07,207 --> 00:15:08,408 Yeah, sometimes Ephraim just 434 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:09,943 pops out a gem. 435 00:15:09,943 --> 00:15:11,477 I did not expect something like that 436 00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:13,112 to come out of your mouth. 437 00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:14,547 I got all sorts of thoughts in here 438 00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:16,316 I haven't even thought of yet. 439 00:15:16,316 --> 00:15:29,963 ♪ 440 00:15:29,963 --> 00:15:34,334 Eli... 441 00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:36,035 A fence post 442 00:15:36,035 --> 00:15:37,370 impaled him. 443 00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:39,239 He's dead! 444 00:15:39,239 --> 00:15:44,043 He's gotta be. 445 00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:46,312 Cole, can you hear me? 446 00:15:46,312 --> 00:15:48,248 Hoyle... 447 00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:49,382 Let's get his mask off 448 00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:51,985 so he can breathe. 449 00:15:51,985 --> 00:15:53,353 Oh! 450 00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:57,390 Look, he's got a false nose. 451 00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:59,092 Put it back on, Hoyle. 452 00:15:59,092 --> 00:16:00,526 -Put it back on! -I'm sorry! 453 00:16:00,526 --> 00:16:01,928 I'm sorry, Cole. 454 00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:04,364 Bad idea, bad idea, bad idea. 455 00:16:04,364 --> 00:16:05,832 I haven't seen anything like that 456 00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:07,100 since the Civil War. 457 00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:08,468 You were in the Civil War? 458 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:11,838 Yeah, it's the first time I ever shot a man. 459 00:16:11,838 --> 00:16:13,139 I wasn't always the great shot 460 00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,874 I am now, I... 461 00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:16,442 I was a cook. 462 00:16:16,442 --> 00:16:18,411 It was the worst battle of them all. 463 00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:21,080 It was at Pittsburgh Landing. 464 00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:22,749 Thirteen thousand casualties 465 00:16:22,749 --> 00:16:24,284 just by lunch time. 466 00:16:24,284 --> 00:16:26,019 Hey everybody! 467 00:16:26,019 --> 00:16:27,120 Lunch time. 468 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:28,288 It's more of a brunch, 469 00:16:28,288 --> 00:16:29,889 but you guys started so early. 470 00:16:29,889 --> 00:16:33,192 I was serving soup to the men 471 00:16:33,192 --> 00:16:34,927 right at the front wall. 472 00:16:34,927 --> 00:16:36,362 Okay, by the way... 473 00:16:36,362 --> 00:16:37,930 I didn't want to light a fire, 474 00:16:37,930 --> 00:16:39,265 obvious reasons. 475 00:16:39,265 --> 00:16:41,401 This is called gazpacho. 476 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:42,568 It's delicious. 477 00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:44,304 It's supposed to be cold. 478 00:16:44,304 --> 00:16:45,838 Can I make a suggestion, though? 479 00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:48,074 Instead of running out there as a group, 480 00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:49,275 you guys might wanna hide 481 00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:50,977 behind stuff, 482 00:16:50,977 --> 00:16:52,779 that'll help with the bullets. 483 00:16:52,779 --> 00:16:55,114 But let's see our soup cups 484 00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:57,483 as half full, you know? 485 00:16:57,483 --> 00:17:00,420 All of a sudden, this fresh wave 486 00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:04,324 of Confederate rebels with their yell, 487 00:17:04,324 --> 00:17:05,858 their blood curdling... 488 00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:07,994 ...yaah! 489 00:17:07,994 --> 00:17:11,364 ♪ 490 00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:14,400 These soldiers came right over the wall. 491 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:19,038 ♪ 492 00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:21,474 It was hand-to-hand combat. 493 00:17:21,474 --> 00:17:23,409 I wasn't trained for that. 494 00:17:23,409 --> 00:17:26,346 ♪ 495 00:17:26,346 --> 00:17:29,115 Suddenly, this young Confederate soldier 496 00:17:29,115 --> 00:17:32,251 comes right over the wall... 497 00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:34,921 I reached down and I grabbed a musket 498 00:17:34,921 --> 00:17:38,291 just in time. 499 00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:40,226 I fired! 500 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,762 Right up his face... 501 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:44,397 his nose... 502 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:48,067 ...his forehead. 503 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:51,804 It was the Battle 504 00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:53,406 of Shadow. 505 00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:56,309 ♪ 506 00:17:56,309 --> 00:17:58,411 Hoyle... 507 00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:01,180 ♪ 508 00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:03,015 Oh my Lord. 509 00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:05,051 It was Cole. 510 00:18:05,051 --> 00:18:06,786 I know, we could try to pass the time 511 00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:08,955 with an activity. 512 00:18:08,955 --> 00:18:12,325 Like what? 513 00:18:12,325 --> 00:18:13,926 You ever arm wrestle? 514 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:17,163 ♪ 515 00:18:17,163 --> 00:18:18,898 Yes. 516 00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:21,200 Let me feel your arm. 517 00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:23,503 It's like a piece of mahogany. 518 00:18:23,503 --> 00:18:25,405 I only arm wrestle for money. 519 00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:26,839 Oh, that is a commodity 520 00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:28,141 I am fresh out of. 521 00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:29,909 ♪ 522 00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:31,978 How about if I pin you 523 00:18:31,978 --> 00:18:33,513 I get a kiss. 524 00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:35,515 Well, if I pin you, what do I get? 525 00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:37,116 You don't get a kiss. 526 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,851 We both win. 527 00:18:38,851 --> 00:18:40,787 Okay. 528 00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:44,857 ♪ 529 00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:48,127 One, two, three. 530 00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:51,964 ♪ 531 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:53,499 I really thought I was gonna beat you. 532 00:18:53,499 --> 00:18:55,935 I really thought I was gonna lose. 533 00:18:55,935 --> 00:18:57,470 I propose a draw. 534 00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,138 Okay. 535 00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:02,475 One, two, three. 536 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,143 Stalemate. 537 00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:12,852 ♪ 538 00:19:12,852 --> 00:19:13,953 You know Cole will probably 539 00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:15,087 kill you for this. 540 00:19:15,087 --> 00:19:16,422 Oh! 541 00:19:16,422 --> 00:19:19,759 ♪ 542 00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:22,428 I created Cole Younger. 543 00:19:22,428 --> 00:19:24,897 Well, I wouldn't, I wouldn't be 544 00:19:24,897 --> 00:19:26,199 so hard on yourself. 545 00:19:26,199 --> 00:19:28,034 Don't you see? 546 00:19:28,034 --> 00:19:30,069 If I hadn't mutilated him, 547 00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:32,805 he wouldn't have become an outlaw. 548 00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:36,142 He wouldn't have shot Myra, my wife. 549 00:19:36,142 --> 00:19:39,946 I'm sorry, Cole. 550 00:19:39,946 --> 00:19:41,881 Hoyle. 551 00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,282 We gotta save him, we can't let him die. 552 00:19:43,282 --> 00:19:44,517 What we're gonna do is 553 00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:45,885 we're gonna push the post out, 554 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:47,119 I'm gonna wedge a rock in it 555 00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:48,821 just to hold it until we get back. 556 00:19:48,821 --> 00:19:50,389 That sounds reasonable. 557 00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:52,158 This is not gonna be pretty. 558 00:19:52,158 --> 00:19:55,761 One, two, three! 559 00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:04,070 ♪ 560 00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:05,838 This is hard for me, Hoyle. 561 00:20:05,838 --> 00:20:07,440 On the one hand, he's my brother. 562 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:08,908 On the other hand, he nearly got me 563 00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:11,143 killed six or seven different times. 564 00:20:11,143 --> 00:20:13,012 Well, he's still alive, 565 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:17,483 although he is barely hanging on. 566 00:20:17,483 --> 00:20:18,818 You two, come on out here. 567 00:20:18,818 --> 00:20:20,119 I wanna talk to you. 568 00:20:20,119 --> 00:20:22,388 -Really? -Yeah. 569 00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:25,491 Now, Ephraim, as promised, 570 00:20:25,491 --> 00:20:26,959 you gave me information 571 00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:28,528 that lead to the capture of Cole. 572 00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:30,129 If I hadn't known he was copulating 573 00:20:30,129 --> 00:20:31,998 with Livinia like you told me, 574 00:20:31,998 --> 00:20:32,999 he wouldn't be here. 575 00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:34,200 So, you're free to go. 576 00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:35,535 You're the one that told him! 577 00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:36,936 Can we talk about this some other time? 578 00:20:36,936 --> 00:20:38,437 No, we should talk about it now. 579 00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:39,872 Well, right now's not a good time... 580 00:20:39,872 --> 00:20:41,207 You just threw me under the wagon. 581 00:20:41,207 --> 00:20:42,975 You know we're gonna have talk later? 582 00:20:42,975 --> 00:20:44,744 I don't like talking. 583 00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:46,112 You guys, it's okay with me 584 00:20:46,112 --> 00:20:47,346 if you talk about it now. 585 00:20:47,346 --> 00:20:48,548 I'm just trying to have a conversation 586 00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:49,949 with my fiancee for a second, 587 00:20:49,949 --> 00:20:51,951 so if you could just backer down. 588 00:20:51,951 --> 00:20:53,319 Fiancee? 589 00:20:53,319 --> 00:20:55,788 That's a French word meaning your betrothed. 590 00:20:55,788 --> 00:20:57,123 Oh, yeah, you hadn't heard? 591 00:20:57,123 --> 00:20:58,224 We're engaged! 592 00:20:58,224 --> 00:20:59,458 Yeah, so... 593 00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:00,826 -There's nothing there. -There will be 594 00:21:00,826 --> 00:21:01,961 after the wedding. 595 00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:04,096 Got it, now Ephraim, just... 596 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:08,134 you are aware of Livinia's... 597 00:21:08,134 --> 00:21:09,902 -Curse. -Well... 598 00:21:09,902 --> 00:21:11,270 -Deadly curse. -He knows. 599 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:12,772 I'm looking this curse 600 00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:13,873 square in the eyes and I'm saying, 601 00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:17,443 "Hey curse, step aside. 602 00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:18,945 My love for this woman 603 00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:20,279 will overpower you." 604 00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:22,248 He's the real brave Younger. 605 00:21:22,248 --> 00:21:24,917 Well, Ephraim, I am impressed. 606 00:21:24,917 --> 00:21:26,052 It takes a brave man 607 00:21:26,052 --> 00:21:27,353 to marry the black widow, 608 00:21:27,353 --> 00:21:29,488 especially when you got your brother, 609 00:21:29,488 --> 00:21:30,823 who's her lover, 610 00:21:30,823 --> 00:21:32,058 that may live through this, 611 00:21:32,058 --> 00:21:33,859 and will most likely 612 00:21:33,859 --> 00:21:35,928 mess you up if he finds out. 613 00:21:35,928 --> 00:21:37,363 I'm not worried about Cole. 614 00:21:37,363 --> 00:21:38,497 I got her love to guide me 615 00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:40,533 to where I need to be. 616 00:21:40,533 --> 00:21:43,169 Well, hot damn, congratulations! 617 00:21:43,169 --> 00:21:44,470 Whoa! 618 00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:46,072 Oh, my God! 619 00:21:46,072 --> 00:21:48,140 You got me in my hip. 620 00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:49,375 Take him to Shank. 621 00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:51,077 Don't die, don't die! 622 00:21:51,077 --> 00:21:52,979 I'm not gonna die. 623 00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:54,380 Hey, we might wanna restructure 624 00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:56,015 the nature of our relationship. 625 00:21:56,015 --> 00:21:57,249 We are getting married 626 00:21:57,249 --> 00:21:58,818 whether you like it or not! 627 00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:01,020 Can't we just do common law? 628 00:22:01,020 --> 00:22:03,422 Ooh, I give him three days. 629 00:22:03,422 --> 00:22:04,890 You know, they're not married yet. 630 00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:06,025 He could still survive. 631 00:22:06,025 --> 00:22:07,093 Good point. 632 00:22:07,093 --> 00:22:08,494 Well, let's not let all that 633 00:22:08,494 --> 00:22:10,196 dampen our day, huh? 634 00:22:10,196 --> 00:22:11,998 -We got Cole Younger. -Yeah! 635 00:22:11,998 --> 00:22:13,566 And now the next step... 636 00:22:13,566 --> 00:22:16,035 Lunch! 637 00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:17,370 No, I was gonna say Sam Starr. 638 00:22:17,370 --> 00:22:18,804 We're onto Sam Starr. 639 00:22:18,804 --> 00:22:20,806 Maybe a quick fornication appointment. 640 00:22:20,806 --> 00:22:21,974 Yeah, that'd be nice. 641 00:22:21,974 --> 00:22:23,342 And then Sam Starr. 40591

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