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1
00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:09,468
A film based on a novel
by B. Hrabal
2
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:15,766
CUTTING IT SHORT
3
00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:18,519
Starring and Featuring
4
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:38,914
Film Editor
5
00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:40,707
Sound Editor
6
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,834
Set Designer
7
00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:44,545
Chief of Production Team
8
00:00:44,628 --> 00:00:48,215
Director of Photography
9
00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:51,885
Directed by
10
00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:03,188
Feeling weak and pale.
11
00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:09,319
Down a pint of ale!
12
00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:30,132
I have something for you.
13
00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:32,926
Look for it!
14
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:40,934
Cold.
15
00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:45,314
Cold.
16
00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:49,818
Cold.
17
00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:53,822
Cold.
18
00:01:58,744 --> 00:02:00,829
Warmer!
19
00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:03,123
Hot!
20
00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:25,270
Patent needle threader!
21
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:34,696
Patent needle threader,
is worth of brightest pearls.
22
00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:43,455
Your trembling hand shall
not miss event he smallest eye!
23
00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:52,798
My good piggie...
24
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,967
Don't be scared, Ludovic,
25
00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:00,889
you'll become very tasty ham!
26
00:03:38,093 --> 00:03:40,387
Here is the liver,
27
00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:44,266
now the heart.
28
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,018
Beautiful, right?
29
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:14,212
There's always enough malt,
we even sell it locally.
30
00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:17,507
The barley is mealy,
the grain is good,
31
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,552
and five or seven crowns
cheaper than last year.
32
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:24,431
- Don't spend too much.
- Order is the main thing.
33
00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:26,099
And decency.
34
00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:29,811
Here we leave the malt
to mellow for 4 to 6 weeks.
35
00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:33,940
Then you clean it and grind it.
This way please.
36
00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:03,845
- Well, Doctor, what do you think?
- I can smell pork!
37
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:08,058
We stocked up well on ice
during the winter season.
38
00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:10,143
How is that?
39
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,021
It is May,
too warm to kill a pig!
40
00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:16,441
The pig broke its leg yesterday,
unfortunately.
41
00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:21,321
As the manager you must do
your best.
42
00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,532
And as the board of directors,
43
00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:25,867
we could sack you.
44
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,877
- Pepper, salt...
- Marjoram...
45
00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:38,588
- Thyme, garlic...
- Ginger...
46
00:05:38,630 --> 00:05:40,590
No, this is not a cake.
47
00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:48,223
We've replaced the boiling
sieves and other parts.
48
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:51,476
We've changed direct heating to
steam heating.
49
00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:54,688
So, if our beer's so good,
why not produce more?
50
00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:57,649
Alright, we could start
boiling also overnight.
51
00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:02,737
We introduced modern boiling and
changed hops dosage distribution.
52
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:06,074
Do you smoke the meat
to conserve it?
53
00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,828
What my wife doesn't eat
goes into the fridge.
54
00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:15,709
During the winter season,
we put resin in the barrels.
55
00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:19,212
And we boiled a lot in advance,
so the beer is mellow,
56
00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:21,214
particularly the lagers.
57
00:06:21,256 --> 00:06:27,053
Good quality interests many inns,
but we can't deliver to everyone.
58
00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:30,974
But I shall deliver it to pubs
with large cold cellars,
59
00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:32,934
where it'll be well preserved.
60
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:39,232
So that our beer wins a good reputation.
61
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:42,736
Mind you, our beer has always had
a good reputation!
62
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:46,406
Before the new brewer came all it
was good for was against constipation.
63
00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:49,534
We need to buy
two more fermentation tubs
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00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:53,663
to increase production
by 5,000 hectol. per year.
65
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,958
- So the percentage...
- That's enough, Manager,
66
00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,337
we'll finish the topic
in the board-room.
67
00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:05,926
- I can smell fresh white pudding.
- This way please.
68
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:10,472
I also propose increasing
the barrel manufacture.
69
00:07:11,514 --> 00:07:14,059
We could adjust...
70
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:40,961
Where have you been again,
Mr. Martin?
71
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,588
I told you to bring wood!
72
00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:47,842
Stay here and stoke up!
73
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,305
We'll make the sausages.
74
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,349
A bit more rum?
75
00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:56,685
Yes?
76
00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:01,564
So much work.
77
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,079
Here!
78
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,393
Whatever the beer's like,
I insist on order.
79
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:22,395
- And decency!
- And cleanliness.
80
00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:27,817
Leave the coal as it is,
so people can see we can afford it.
81
00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:33,364
- You must try harder, Manager.
- What a lovely smell, so lovely!
82
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,713
So, help yourselves! Please.
83
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:11,694
May I invite the gentlemen
to a pork-feast?
84
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:16,908
Well, we could finish
our meeting tomorrow, right?
85
00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:54,946
Tastes delicious.
86
00:12:03,014 --> 00:12:05,433
An angel's flown by!
87
00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:31,793
- My God, I'm bloated!
- The amount I've eaten today!
88
00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:38,758
- A full plate of soup.
- It was a fairy-tale.
89
00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:42,428
White pudding, two sausages,
90
00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:44,472
more meat...
91
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,850
and a cold sausage on top.
92
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:52,355
No, two cold sausages and then...
93
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:56,484
Dear lady,
94
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:01,698
I bow to your culinary expertise.
95
00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:06,911
What a beautiful,
96
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,373
relaxed afternoon.
97
00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:19,090
I have to look at 2 women
in labour,
98
00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:23,177
and one with
a gall-bladder attack.
99
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:47,201
You must try harder, Manager.
100
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:53,458
You must do your best, Manager.
101
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,432
They're all dumb.
102
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,882
I have something for you.
103
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:52,642
What is it?
104
00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:55,061
CHEST EXPANDER
105
00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:11,577
Our chest expander
will strengthen your muscles.
106
00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:16,207
The results will surprise you.
107
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:20,336
You too will be as strong
as a tiger.
108
00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:28,761
Which can kill a much
bigger cow with one blow.
109
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:54,328
Chest expander for men, women,
for the whole family.
110
00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:04,005
I was falling asleep
with the rosy image
111
00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:07,800
of having two steaks
for breakfast.
112
00:16:09,051 --> 00:16:14,765
All Francin ever had was Luke-warm
coffee and a slice of dry bread.
113
00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:30,656
Francin's muscles were as magnificent
as the gladiator's
114
00:16:30,698 --> 00:16:32,950
on the chest expander box,
115
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:37,747
but the poor man saw himself
as a skinned rabbit.
116
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:13,050
- What happened?
- Pepin.
117
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,702
My brother-in-law and alive,
at last!
118
00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:44,498
I was apprenticed as
a small town shop-assistant,
119
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:48,419
delivering soda water
and living in the attic.
120
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,672
Dreamt of attending
a business-school.
121
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:55,384
I'd send my mom a florin,
sometimes two.
122
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,929
Pepin was a cobbler,
worked from home
123
00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:02,224
but he would only shout
and fight with shoes.
124
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:07,146
Whilst others made two pairs,
he barely made one pair.
125
00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:12,652
I used to send money home
every month,
126
00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:16,822
so he wouldn't come here
and shout the place down.
127
00:19:46,227 --> 00:19:48,979
Who are you, woman?
Sister-in-law?
128
00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:51,691
- Yes, I am. Welcome, brother-in-law!
- What's wrong?
129
00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:54,402
I've come to stay for two weeks
and you're out flat!
130
00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:57,029
- Help yourself.
- Yeah.
131
00:19:57,613 --> 00:20:00,950
Well, I've lost my appetite
been feeling poorly.
132
00:20:01,742 --> 00:20:04,745
So, Francin,
they all send their greetings
133
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:07,707
except for Bochalena,
she's had it for good,
134
00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:11,419
some trickster slipped
gun powder or what into a log,
135
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:16,090
the old hag stoked up the fire
and it blew up and she was a goner.
136
00:20:16,132 --> 00:20:19,927
- How's your wife?
- What are you talking about? I'm single.
137
00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:23,305
And priest broke
his hip-bon so badly,
138
00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:25,474
that he will never fully recover.
139
00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:28,102
Uncle Zavicak was tiling
the church spire
140
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,855
the footbridge collapsed
and down he fell,
141
00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:34,984
but straight into
a linden-tree, on his back,
142
00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:37,528
but nothing happened to him
143
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:41,240
and the priest ran down
to bless him,
144
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:44,410
stumbled over a step
fell over and broke his leg.
145
00:20:44,452 --> 00:20:49,331
Old Zavicak took him to
Prostejov hospital.
146
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:53,711
Perfect, right?
147
00:20:54,670 --> 00:20:58,090
A company called Salamander
makes the glue.
148
00:20:58,841 --> 00:21:02,261
And as you're an exceptionally clever
woman, sister-in-law,
149
00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:05,931
I'll mend all your shoes
for you in those 2 weeks.
150
00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:09,018
I'm a profession a list when
it comes to shoes.
151
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:12,104
This is the Parisian style,
152
00:21:12,146 --> 00:21:15,983
this here is the instep
and it also has other names.
153
00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:20,154
This is the heel, or Absatz
in German or Austrian.
154
00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:24,366
Well, if you want to practice cobbling,
you've got to have a diploma.
155
00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:28,162
It's like being a doctor or having
A-levels.
156
00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:32,875
I'll teach you all I know
in the two weeks I'm staying.
157
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,002
Two weeks?
158
00:21:35,336 --> 00:21:38,047
Two years probably,
most likely a life sentence.
159
00:21:38,088 --> 00:21:39,590
Francin!
160
00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:53,646
I'll make apple strudel.
161
00:21:57,942 --> 00:22:01,695
Your sausages are damn good,
pity I'm feeling so poorly.
162
00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:05,491
I'll teach you everything.
I made shoes for a guy
163
00:22:05,533 --> 00:22:09,203
who was a court shoemaker,
not only the Emperor,
164
00:22:09,286 --> 00:22:11,956
but the whole region liked him,
where he supplied his shoes.
165
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:13,916
- On a bicycle.
- Rubbish.
166
00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:17,002
Such a supplier is not
a common tradesman,
167
00:22:17,044 --> 00:22:20,798
if the Emperor saw him on
a bike, he would take him...
168
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,883
- That bike.
- Rubbish. The title
169
00:22:22,925 --> 00:22:25,010
and the eagle from the shop sign!
170
00:22:25,052 --> 00:22:32,101
As you saw and as I've shown you,
we are highly active.
171
00:22:33,686 --> 00:22:35,145
...highly active.
172
00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:41,068
We have improved the quality of beer
using first-class ingredients,
173
00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:45,155
by implementing modern technologies
from abroad, too,
174
00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:51,745
and I also use my Laurin & Klement
motorcycle to ride round local inns
175
00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:55,749
and gather new contracts,
which is...
176
00:22:56,542 --> 00:22:59,628
Old Kafka was so nervous,
that when his little girl
177
00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:02,339
kept hitting her head
on the furniture,
178
00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:05,593
he padded all the edges
of the furniture.
179
00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:09,221
And to be more active still...
180
00:23:09,263 --> 00:23:12,600
He was so nervous that he opened
the door with such force that in the end
181
00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:14,977
that he hit her himself
and made her unconscious.
182
00:23:15,019 --> 00:23:19,648
So he padded, on a friend's advice,
his little girl's forehead instead.
183
00:23:19,690 --> 00:23:23,777
And then uncle Method
read an advert:
184
00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:26,822
Are you bored? Buy a raccoon!
185
00:23:26,864 --> 00:23:30,618
So he ordered one,
as he had no kids himself.
186
00:23:30,659 --> 00:23:34,496
The raccoon was like a kid,
it arrived a week later.
187
00:23:34,538 --> 00:23:38,584
It loved everyone,
but kept washing everything.
188
00:23:38,626 --> 00:23:42,046
Once he washed uncle's clock
and his three pocket-watches
189
00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:44,131
and now nobody can fix them.
190
00:23:44,173 --> 00:23:48,385
And the raccoon also took...
The cakes are really good!
191
00:23:48,427 --> 00:23:54,308
...bicycle parts to wash them in a stream.
And the neighbors were saying...
192
00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:56,560
I wrote up these signs...
193
00:23:57,478 --> 00:24:02,691
And when uncle kissed auntie,
the raccoon wanted to kiss too!
194
00:24:02,733 --> 00:24:07,112
So he had to go and kiss her in
the woods like when they were young.
195
00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:11,659
I wrote the signs
and the board should decide
196
00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:17,331
if we should have them printed.
I'd take them round the inns
197
00:24:17,373 --> 00:24:23,420
on my business trips on my
Laurin & Klement motorcycle.
198
00:24:24,129 --> 00:24:27,257
I'd like to mention one more slogan.
199
00:24:27,716 --> 00:24:32,763
Only our May lager
will make the thirsty truly thirsty.
200
00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:39,019
- What do you think of that, gentlemen?
- What's that inhuman shouting?
201
00:24:39,061 --> 00:24:42,106
My brother's on a visit,
for two weeks.
202
00:24:42,773 --> 00:24:46,652
Please go and tell him
to stop it at once.
203
00:24:46,694 --> 00:24:48,529
This is our brewery!
204
00:24:48,570 --> 00:24:51,448
Tell him to do his hollering
out in the fields!
205
00:24:51,490 --> 00:24:53,784
...the raccoon moved from
the Dutch stove in the room
206
00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:56,495
and mucked up all the furniture
and beddings.
207
00:24:56,537 --> 00:24:58,622
So uncle Method wrote an advert:
208
00:24:58,664 --> 00:25:01,291
Are you bored? Buy a raccoon.
209
00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:05,462
And he was heavy-hearted no longer.
210
00:25:05,504 --> 00:25:09,299
Why are you two shouting,
you peasants?
211
00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:14,179
It's not me,
it's somebody inside me.
212
00:25:14,221 --> 00:25:18,767
For mercy's sake, stop it.
You endanger my position.
213
00:25:23,022 --> 00:25:28,235
You want me to go back to accounting?
Instead of in the brewery?
214
00:25:32,448 --> 00:25:36,326
You should be with the police, Pepin,
you're so clever!
215
00:25:36,368 --> 00:25:39,329
- Don't be silly, sister-in-law.
- Silence.
216
00:25:40,581 --> 00:25:45,377
Uncle Adolf was a copper,
one day he was chasing a scoundrel.
217
00:25:45,919 --> 00:25:49,423
They surrounded the building
and when they entered the kitchen,
218
00:25:49,465 --> 00:25:52,843
there was an old hag sitting there
and the chief detective said to her:
219
00:25:52,885 --> 00:25:54,428
Where's your old man?
220
00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:58,515
The guy jumped out of the window,
she said, into a cesspool.
221
00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:05,481
- Please continue.
-Yes.
222
00:26:06,607 --> 00:26:10,152
The hop-growers
are competitive.
223
00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:16,658
The board should allow me
to ride on my Laurin & Klement
224
00:26:17,409 --> 00:26:22,748
and interview them personally
in the Zatec area. And...
225
00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:28,253
Excuse me...
226
00:26:29,797 --> 00:26:37,930
He threw away the gun and chased him
to the bus stop with the cuffs.
227
00:26:39,014 --> 00:26:42,392
They wouldn't let Adolf
go in the police car,
228
00:26:42,434 --> 00:26:47,439
but he stank too much, so
he had to walk towards Ostrava.
229
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,275
Then they kicked him out of the tram.
230
00:26:50,317 --> 00:26:54,363
He walked home all the way and his
landlady refused to wash his suit,
231
00:26:54,404 --> 00:26:56,740
so he took the suit to the cleaner's...
232
00:26:56,782 --> 00:26:59,785
We shall resume the meeting
in half an hour.
233
00:26:59,827 --> 00:27:04,206
Ask the accountant
for a basin of lukewarm water.
234
00:27:04,248 --> 00:27:08,210
Careful, Mr. Manager.
It might have an negative impact.
235
00:27:08,252 --> 00:27:10,712
An important meeting is
turning into a comedy,
236
00:27:10,754 --> 00:27:13,966
into a Charlie Chaplin
or Lupino Lane act.
237
00:27:14,007 --> 00:27:16,301
And she screamed at Adolf:
You've shat your trousers
238
00:27:16,343 --> 00:27:19,388
so wash them yourself!
What a shame it was.
239
00:27:20,514 --> 00:27:23,934
What is this muck?
I say what is this muck?
240
00:27:23,976 --> 00:27:26,520
The best glue in the world,
241
00:27:26,562 --> 00:27:30,440
made in Vienna by the
Salamander shoemaker company.
242
00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:35,255
Thanks a lot, brother.
243
00:28:42,429 --> 00:28:45,349
Uncle Adolf, he was truly unlucky.
244
00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:48,185
One day he met drunk
245
00:28:48,227 --> 00:28:52,773
dentists in a pub.
They invited them to their table.
246
00:28:52,814 --> 00:28:59,321
And later they pulled out
each other's front teeth.
247
00:28:59,863 --> 00:29:03,575
Uncle Adolf's too, because
he was as pissed as a newt, too.
248
00:29:03,617 --> 00:29:05,160
How unlucky!
249
00:29:05,202 --> 00:29:09,915
Not really, what if they had been the vets
that castrate animals!
250
00:29:09,957 --> 00:29:12,626
So he was lucky then.
251
00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:43,342
An insurance clerk called Korec,
252
00:30:43,759 --> 00:30:46,386
had his son studying in Olomouc.
253
00:30:46,428 --> 00:30:50,599
Dr. Karafiat came to him as
an inspector and complained
254
00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:53,977
that people weren't getting
their sick-pay.
255
00:30:54,311 --> 00:30:57,189
The insurance guy admitted pocketing it
256
00:30:57,230 --> 00:31:00,067
and sending the money
to his son to pay his studies.
257
00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:03,320
The doctor said it wasn't his business.
So this Korec took a scythe,
258
00:31:03,362 --> 00:31:06,782
drank a bottle of rum
and cut his throat.
259
00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:09,159
These days life is easier.
260
00:31:09,201 --> 00:31:12,954
Husbands and wives
take turns hanging themselves.
261
00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:15,707
Like that cobbler who
thieved at night,
262
00:31:15,749 --> 00:31:18,293
his wife couldn't steal at all,
263
00:31:18,335 --> 00:31:22,464
so he hanged himself,
couldn't bear the shame.
264
00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:28,261
Like this Chytil, whose wife sold
shirts, but was a thief as well.
265
00:31:29,012 --> 00:31:33,517
And when the coppers found out, he was
so ashamed he hanged himself, too.
266
00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:10,048
Gone is all our love
267
00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:16,555
Enough to make you weep
268
00:34:19,558 --> 00:34:24,396
Nothing left at all
269
00:34:26,314 --> 00:34:29,359
All drowned in the deep...
270
00:34:29,859 --> 00:34:33,780
Depends if it's real
passion or just fun, you see.
271
00:34:33,822 --> 00:34:36,616
One woman had 22 children
272
00:34:36,866 --> 00:34:41,204
and the other nothing,
even if a brewery chimney fell on her.
273
00:34:51,214 --> 00:34:56,136
Nothing left at all
274
00:35:59,074 --> 00:36:06,414
Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Si...
275
00:36:07,540 --> 00:36:09,125
Do!
276
00:36:10,043 --> 00:36:12,629
Do, Si, La...
277
00:36:17,717 --> 00:36:20,261
- I'm going to sing!
- What will you have for breakfast,
278
00:36:20,303 --> 00:36:23,640
- tea, coffee, milk, chocolate or beer?
- Rum!
279
00:36:58,967 --> 00:37:03,471
Remember, dear friend,
every woman is potentially evil.
280
00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:08,351
Good morning.
281
00:37:11,855 --> 00:37:14,482
What was I talking about?
282
00:37:14,899 --> 00:37:19,696
- Women.
- Ah, yes. Woman is the only good
283
00:37:19,988 --> 00:37:22,699
we still have in the world.
284
00:37:40,216 --> 00:37:43,303
FASHIONABLE COIFFURES
285
00:37:45,764 --> 00:37:48,308
Come back tomorrow.
286
00:37:51,936 --> 00:37:54,439
This won't do, Mr. Tapster.
287
00:37:54,481 --> 00:37:58,359
The beer is tepid,
the pipes unwashed,
288
00:37:58,401 --> 00:38:00,904
not to mention the glasses.
289
00:38:00,945 --> 00:38:04,491
You're ruining
the reputation of our beer.
290
00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:08,828
We shall have to cancel the contract.
291
00:38:59,629 --> 00:39:02,882
Look at this beauty in the jug,
Mr. Brewer.
292
00:39:02,924 --> 00:39:04,843
See this froth of the beer.
293
00:39:04,884 --> 00:39:07,136
It isn't froth,
but whipped cream!
294
00:39:07,178 --> 00:39:10,223
It isn’t cream,
but whipped custard!
295
00:39:10,265 --> 00:39:14,644
- It isn't custard, it's...
- It's not cold enough.
296
00:39:19,649 --> 00:39:22,777
Azure, the colour of summer.
297
00:39:25,238 --> 00:39:29,117
So we'll choose this colour of hope.
298
00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:31,578
Azure.
299
00:39:33,371 --> 00:39:36,040
The chamomile smells so nice.
300
00:40:12,994 --> 00:40:15,663
This fountain
and that brewer wife's hair
301
00:40:15,705 --> 00:40:18,333
are the pride of our town.
302
00:40:18,541 --> 00:40:20,293
How dare you?
303
00:40:20,335 --> 00:40:22,712
The beer's not cool enough,
I'm telling you.
304
00:40:22,754 --> 00:40:24,797
This is our hotel, it's our business.
305
00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:28,927
- We are the Board of Directors.
- We'll send you enough ice.
306
00:40:36,559 --> 00:40:40,480
- Good morning, gentlemen!
- Good morning, good morning.
307
00:40:40,521 --> 00:40:44,192
- Hello, Francin. - Hello.
- When will you get home?
308
00:40:44,233 --> 00:40:46,486
I don't know,
I have to arrange something.
309
00:40:46,527 --> 00:40:50,448
Permit me to drink
to the beauty of your hair!
310
00:40:50,490 --> 00:40:53,952
- To your culinary art!
- Yes, absolutely.
311
00:41:13,513 --> 00:41:17,308
Dear Lady Brewer,
have one with us, please.
312
00:41:19,435 --> 00:41:22,814
- Your health!
- To yours! - Come on!
313
00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,091
Good, but not cold enough.
314
00:41:51,259 --> 00:41:53,177
Goodbye.
315
00:42:15,408 --> 00:42:19,620
We'll make you
a lovable creature
316
00:42:20,246 --> 00:42:24,125
With a golden collar round
your neck...
317
00:42:27,879 --> 00:42:29,756
...little wind...
318
00:42:36,846 --> 00:42:40,433
You'll look like a flower
319
00:42:41,225 --> 00:42:46,105
The world will rejoice
320
00:42:46,856 --> 00:42:51,152
It'll be wild to see you dance...
321
00:42:57,408 --> 00:43:00,078
Do, Re, Mi, Fa...
322
00:43:04,832 --> 00:43:06,959
Do, Si, La...
323
00:43:12,256 --> 00:43:15,468
Do, Re, Mi, Fa...
324
00:43:20,890 --> 00:43:23,267
Do, Si, La...
325
00:43:45,414 --> 00:43:47,083
Just perfect!
326
00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:54,132
My heart is a beehive
abuzz with pretty girls...
327
00:45:46,118 --> 00:45:49,330
- What can I do for you?
- Nothing.
328
00:45:49,372 --> 00:45:52,124
Wait till I run out of petrol.
329
00:46:51,559 --> 00:46:57,148
And then Johnny began
to sing his song
330
00:46:57,690 --> 00:47:06,907
And kissing his Bonnie girl
331
00:47:42,068 --> 00:47:44,320
I've brought you something.
332
00:47:51,243 --> 00:47:52,953
Look for it!
333
00:48:01,796 --> 00:48:03,714
Cold...
334
00:48:08,594 --> 00:48:10,262
Cold...
335
00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:21,524
What is it?
336
00:48:30,199 --> 00:48:33,661
Oh, God, so beautiful...
337
00:48:38,499 --> 00:48:40,501
What is it for?
338
00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:43,671
Put the light out.
339
00:48:49,427 --> 00:48:52,263
Now Pepin can scream all day,
340
00:48:53,305 --> 00:48:56,183
I can have problems at work,
341
00:48:56,559 --> 00:48:59,437
they can all offend me as they will,
342
00:49:00,146 --> 00:49:04,066
but these sparks
give me zest for life.
343
00:49:04,692 --> 00:49:06,735
Life courage.
344
00:49:14,452 --> 00:49:16,954
This purple ozone, Maryska,
345
00:49:16,996 --> 00:49:21,000
will take away your longing to do
in public all the things
346
00:49:21,041 --> 00:49:24,003
polite people
hardly dare even think about.
347
00:49:24,128 --> 00:49:26,172
Or to do them at home.
348
00:49:26,213 --> 00:49:30,176
- Well, here I am!
- Shut the door! - Yeah.
349
00:49:34,305 --> 00:49:38,100
This is good for your health,
for your nerves.
350
00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:42,646
We shall do it every day,
Maryska, yes?
351
00:49:44,315 --> 00:49:46,275
Yes, Francin.
352
00:49:49,361 --> 00:49:52,239
We shall do it every night.
353
00:49:55,993 --> 00:49:59,914
Gorgeous! Like a parody
on genital hygiene!
354
00:50:00,998 --> 00:50:03,459
Uncle Pepin,
I bet you are hungry.
355
00:50:08,839 --> 00:50:12,384
My boss had a daughter, Mary.
A belly like a chamber-pot,
356
00:50:12,426 --> 00:50:16,263
bust like Maria Theresa,
bottom like a cistern.
357
00:50:16,305 --> 00:50:21,268
One night they said to me:
You're sleeping here, by the stove.
358
00:50:51,966 --> 00:50:56,011
Come morning Mary touched me
and put those tits on my chest
359
00:50:56,387 --> 00:51:02,434
and I jumped up
and split my head open on the stove.
360
00:51:05,938 --> 00:51:08,857
And as I started cleaning the wound,
361
00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:13,529
the whole family jumped off their beds
happy there'd be a wedding.
362
00:51:13,737 --> 00:51:16,949
- Francin!
- And then Mary bought me a tie
363
00:51:16,991 --> 00:51:22,538
and a ring. I wouldn't have it,
pretending to be weak in the chest.
364
00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:25,624
She married a guy
called Jetrutka.
365
00:51:32,089 --> 00:51:34,925
A drunkard he was,
366
00:51:35,801 --> 00:51:39,471
every time he sneezed
he got Mary pregnant.
367
00:52:28,228 --> 00:52:32,608
1,2,1,2,1,2...
368
00:52:33,984 --> 00:52:35,778
Stop!
369
00:52:35,903 --> 00:52:37,655
Right foot forwards,
370
00:52:37,696 --> 00:52:41,158
shoulders back, chest up,
Attention...
371
00:52:43,410 --> 00:52:46,622
1, 2,1, 2...
372
00:52:55,005 --> 00:52:58,300
This here is called the jabber.
373
00:52:58,634 --> 00:53:01,804
And this is the barrel...
374
00:53:01,970 --> 00:53:04,807
Beer barrel. Whiskey barrel.
375
00:53:05,391 --> 00:53:08,686
You're soft in the head,
sister-in-law.
376
00:53:09,269 --> 00:53:13,774
If you said that to the Captain
he'd cut you up with his saber.
377
00:53:13,982 --> 00:53:18,612
Barrel of the gun,
that's what it is.
378
00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:21,115
Attention!
379
00:53:21,365 --> 00:53:27,287
1,2,3,4...
380
00:53:39,299 --> 00:53:42,720
For offending
the greatest army -
381
00:53:43,053 --> 00:53:44,763
the Austrian!
382
00:53:46,765 --> 00:53:48,392
1, 2...
383
00:53:48,434 --> 00:53:52,187
- Why are you yelling here?
- We're playing at soldiers.
384
00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:56,817
- Meaning drill.
- Play at what you like, but not here.
385
00:53:56,859 --> 00:54:01,113
- Where are we to play?
- On top of the chimney for all I care.
386
00:54:01,989 --> 00:54:04,283
But quietly!
387
00:54:05,784 --> 00:54:08,162
The chimney?
388
00:54:09,413 --> 00:54:11,498
The chimney.
389
00:54:31,769 --> 00:54:35,314
Francin has frayed nerves.
Baptists would say to him
390
00:54:35,355 --> 00:54:39,359
that he should wash his private
parts with lukewarm water.
391
00:54:43,947 --> 00:54:45,657
After you.
392
00:54:50,788 --> 00:54:53,665
The chimney, he said.
So the chimney it is.
393
00:55:37,292 --> 00:55:40,128
Oh yes, sister-in-law.
394
00:55:41,964 --> 00:55:44,967
This would make
a great command-post!
395
00:55:45,175 --> 00:55:47,261
Or a lookout tower.
396
00:55:47,386 --> 00:55:50,889
Rubbish!
That's for civilians,
397
00:55:51,348 --> 00:55:56,186
a command post's for soldier
monitoring enemy movements.
398
00:56:00,691 --> 00:56:03,735
An intelligent beauty
you are, sister-in-law,
399
00:56:03,777 --> 00:56:08,532
but if the Captain heard you
he'd hit you with his saber and shout:
400
00:56:08,866 --> 00:56:11,785
I'll hack your Willie off!
401
00:56:18,959 --> 00:56:25,257
But he wouldn't hack my Willie off,
he liked me, I carried his saber.
402
00:56:27,843 --> 00:56:29,803
I was a perfect student,
403
00:56:30,387 --> 00:56:33,765
all merit and distinction.
404
00:56:37,603 --> 00:56:44,943
But how could the Colonel remember
one thousand men?
405
00:56:45,402 --> 00:56:48,238
- Isn't it beautiful, Uncle Pepin?
- It is.
406
00:57:44,336 --> 00:57:45,837
Pepin,
407
00:57:47,506 --> 00:57:50,717
is it true that in the army
you grazed goats?
408
00:57:51,134 --> 00:57:52,803
Who said that?
409
00:57:52,970 --> 00:57:56,473
The tobacconist.
He was a Captain in the war
410
00:57:56,515 --> 00:57:59,851
and watched you
through his binoculars.
411
00:58:04,356 --> 00:58:07,401
Tobacconists couldn't
be Captains,
412
00:58:07,442 --> 00:58:10,278
the Emperor wouldn't have it.
413
00:58:13,281 --> 00:58:17,411
The Emperor would never give
binoculars to a tobacconist.
414
00:58:17,452 --> 00:58:20,914
A wounded soldier could
later become a tobacconist,
415
00:58:21,581 --> 00:58:24,543
but a tobacconist couldn't
become a Captain.
416
00:59:03,790 --> 00:59:05,667
Forward, now!
417
00:59:38,075 --> 00:59:40,869
- Are you dizzy, sir?
- Dizzy?
418
00:59:42,788 --> 00:59:44,372
Horribly dizzy!
419
00:59:46,208 --> 00:59:49,503
In the name of the law,
climb down.
420
00:59:50,420 --> 00:59:52,255
Your brother-in-law, too.
421
00:59:54,716 --> 00:59:56,510
After you.
422
01:00:02,099 --> 01:00:05,560
I'll go down on the inside,
to practice it.
423
01:00:07,145 --> 01:00:10,565
Pepin! Down!
424
01:00:19,699 --> 01:00:23,411
Are you bored? Buy a raccoon.
425
01:01:14,337 --> 01:01:16,673
You deserve spanking.
426
01:01:17,048 --> 01:01:20,093
- On my bare bottom.
- On your bare bottom.
427
01:01:21,928 --> 01:01:25,098
It must have been wonderful up there.
428
01:01:26,099 --> 01:01:28,810
Yes, as it was dangerous,
429
01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:32,105
and what's dangerous is the right thing.
430
01:01:32,147 --> 01:01:36,026
The Austrian soldier
triumphs again!
431
01:01:36,943 --> 01:01:38,862
Perfect.
432
01:01:39,404 --> 01:01:42,365
Is that your brother,
the shouter?
433
01:01:42,782 --> 01:01:45,285
- Yes, that's him.
- That's me.
434
01:01:46,620 --> 01:01:48,330
What's his trade?
435
01:01:48,663 --> 01:01:51,374
A cobbler and a maltster!
436
01:01:52,292 --> 01:01:57,422
Give him a job in the brewery,
that's an order.
437
01:01:57,797 --> 01:02:02,219
For shouting, work
is the best cure of all.
438
01:02:14,814 --> 01:02:17,108
The operation is over.
439
01:02:17,901 --> 01:02:19,569
Drive off!
440
01:02:22,322 --> 01:02:26,743
We are a voluntary fire brigade,
Mr. Manager,
441
01:02:27,285 --> 01:02:30,038
not firemen from
an American film
442
01:02:30,080 --> 01:02:32,165
with Lupino Lane.
443
01:02:32,374 --> 01:02:35,168
We shall send you the bill!
444
01:02:41,633 --> 01:02:44,636
It must have been beautiful
up there!
445
01:03:04,990 --> 01:03:08,410
Francin's nerves are
damned frayed...
446
01:03:38,815 --> 01:03:40,275
Francin!
447
01:03:48,366 --> 01:03:51,369
The music will give you strength,
448
01:03:54,998 --> 01:03:56,875
heal your nerves,
449
01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:03,590
revive your organism.
450
01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:05,693
When I did this
with Miss Vlasta at the bar,
451
01:05:05,735 --> 01:05:09,072
the dragoons screamed
and wanted more brandy!
452
01:05:28,341 --> 01:05:29,676
Ouch!
453
01:05:39,853 --> 01:05:41,438
My foot!
454
01:05:53,408 --> 01:05:55,952
- We must call the Doctor.
- Yeah.
455
01:05:58,163 --> 01:05:59,873
What a disaster.
456
01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:04,919
What have you been up
to now?
457
01:06:07,839 --> 01:06:12,802
If she doesn't stay in bed
she'll be on crutches for life,
458
01:06:15,013 --> 01:06:16,931
or be in a wheelchair.
459
01:06:17,932 --> 01:06:22,103
Like I said, complete rest
460
01:06:22,854 --> 01:06:25,023
and we will see in two weeks.
461
01:06:28,818 --> 01:06:31,279
Brother, can you forgive me?
462
01:06:32,363 --> 01:06:35,200
You were sent to me by heaven.
463
01:06:45,877 --> 01:06:48,671
What else does in the fodder?
464
01:06:49,255 --> 01:06:53,259
Crush the potatoes, they're in the pot.
465
01:06:54,177 --> 01:06:57,388
- You can cut apples, too.
- Good.
466
01:06:58,848 --> 01:07:03,102
And you must take your temperature,
you coughed last night.
467
01:07:12,904 --> 01:07:14,239
Ouch!
468
01:07:14,989 --> 01:07:17,116
38.6.
469
01:07:18,952 --> 01:07:21,204
Well, that's a fever.
470
01:07:22,205 --> 01:07:24,582
A cold compress,
471
01:07:27,210 --> 01:07:30,046
so your lungs
472
01:07:31,339 --> 01:07:35,593
don't get stuck to your pleura.
473
01:07:36,928 --> 01:07:39,180
That could mean pneumonia.
474
01:07:48,940 --> 01:07:52,777
Now he has me like he wanted.
He can now hope
475
01:07:52,819 --> 01:07:56,906
to have me in a wheelchair,
if my ankle doesn't heal well.
476
01:07:56,948 --> 01:08:00,702
He'd be the happiest of husbands.
477
01:08:02,328 --> 01:08:05,582
Now he has me
where he always wanted me,
478
01:08:05,623 --> 01:08:08,293
ill and helpless.
479
01:08:10,712 --> 01:08:12,130
Francin?
480
01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:16,134
Do you have a minute?
481
01:08:16,384 --> 01:08:19,804
Of course, you're an invalid now.
482
01:08:20,805 --> 01:08:26,102
So go down to the cellar,
there's a pot with a heavy stone.
483
01:08:27,478 --> 01:08:31,983
And under the stone, there's
meat, ready to be smoked.
484
01:08:32,025 --> 01:08:34,986
Go there and turn it over.
485
01:08:35,862 --> 01:08:37,196
Me?
486
01:08:37,864 --> 01:08:40,241
You know I have a horror of meat.
487
01:08:41,451 --> 01:08:46,414
You'll have me
in a wheelchair, I think,
488
01:08:47,582 --> 01:08:50,418
remember I'm an invalid.
489
01:08:53,921 --> 01:08:56,633
I'll go at once, my dear.
490
01:08:58,092 --> 01:09:00,345
I know, you're an invalid.
491
01:09:09,228 --> 01:09:11,230
Ugh, garlic.
492
01:09:41,344 --> 01:09:44,472
Go with it quickly until it's fresh.
493
01:09:46,265 --> 01:09:47,975
You can go.
494
01:10:58,421 --> 01:11:01,924
- I have something for you.
- What?
495
01:11:02,216 --> 01:11:04,594
- Close your eyes!
- Yes.
496
01:11:05,052 --> 01:11:07,889
- Are they shut?
- Yes.
497
01:11:08,055 --> 01:11:10,725
- You won't peep?
- No.
498
01:11:12,977 --> 01:11:14,520
So...
499
01:11:16,689 --> 01:11:18,775
- Now?
- Now.
500
01:11:21,360 --> 01:11:23,946
Oh, it's beautiful!
501
01:11:25,740 --> 01:11:28,326
- Do you like it?
- Yes.
502
01:11:31,204 --> 01:11:34,582
- And who bought it for you?
- Francin.
503
01:11:34,624 --> 01:11:37,293
- And who is that?
- You.
504
01:11:37,585 --> 01:11:39,712
And who am?
505
01:11:44,675 --> 01:11:46,803
l am your...?
506
01:11:47,553 --> 01:11:49,514
My hubbie.
507
01:12:05,905 --> 01:12:08,366
What more could I wish for?
508
01:12:08,407 --> 01:12:11,452
I feel fine,
my wife's an invalid
509
01:12:11,702 --> 01:12:15,414
and brother Pepin's working
and stopped shouting.
510
01:14:44,855 --> 01:14:48,234
Who says I'm losing my voice.
511
01:14:50,194 --> 01:14:52,697
Alright, we will do it.
512
01:14:56,909 --> 01:14:59,996
- Hello, brother.
- Are the canals clean? - Not yet.
513
01:15:00,037 --> 01:15:02,206
So Pepin will go and clean them,
514
01:15:02,248 --> 01:15:05,209
there he can bellow
as he likes,
515
01:15:05,251 --> 01:15:07,044
but not in German,
516
01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:10,131
all our board-members
are Sokol patriots.
517
01:15:17,263 --> 01:15:20,641
Why not be happy
518
01:15:20,975 --> 01:15:24,311
Why not be happy
519
01:15:25,062 --> 01:15:28,232
If God gives us health
520
01:15:28,774 --> 01:15:32,111
If God gives us health
521
01:15:32,153 --> 01:15:35,698
If God gives us health
522
01:15:36,115 --> 01:15:39,618
And who would think that...
523
01:16:00,264 --> 01:16:05,436
And told Pauline to stand up
and give little Martin a hug.
524
01:16:05,478 --> 01:16:09,106
And then they kissed, as they were told.
525
01:16:10,483 --> 01:16:13,861
Miss Pauline stood
and gave Zemla her hand.
526
01:16:13,903 --> 01:16:18,199
He was so happy.
527
01:16:21,786 --> 01:16:24,163
But they would hardly have kissed
528
01:16:24,205 --> 01:16:28,209
had the good lady Sustrova
not given them a push.
529
01:16:28,751 --> 01:16:33,589
Martin felt electricity
running through him
530
01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:38,427
when he kissed her lovely pink lips,
531
01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:43,599
and felt the girl's breasts
against his chest.
532
01:16:46,852 --> 01:16:49,355
- Well, here I am.
- Welcome.
533
01:16:53,192 --> 01:16:54,568
What a disaster.
534
01:16:54,985 --> 01:16:57,404
Old Bochalena had a vision
535
01:16:57,446 --> 01:17:03,661
that a big horse with burning mane
flew over our town.
536
01:17:04,411 --> 01:17:07,540
She said: this means war.
537
01:17:10,543 --> 01:17:12,628
And war it was.
538
01:17:14,338 --> 01:17:18,300
And last year the whole
town was astonished,
539
01:17:19,426 --> 01:17:22,847
when baby Jesus flew
above the town square.
540
01:17:22,888 --> 01:17:24,974
But then it was explained.
541
01:17:25,141 --> 01:17:28,477
You see, little Lolan grazed
his sheep
542
01:17:29,311 --> 01:17:32,815
and an airplane flew past,
543
01:17:33,315 --> 01:17:38,737
dragging a rope with bag to test it,
the rope got round Lolan's foot
544
01:17:38,904 --> 01:17:43,242
and Lolan, a pretty child that he was,
platinum hair and all,
545
01:17:43,284 --> 01:17:46,453
was up there in the sky.
546
01:17:46,704 --> 01:17:53,085
So Lolan was in the air, but the old
women thought it was baby Jesus.
547
01:17:53,335 --> 01:17:56,422
And then he got caught
in that old linden tree by the church,
548
01:17:56,463 --> 01:18:02,720
and as this Jesus or Lolan
fell, he asked:
549
01:18:03,596 --> 01:18:05,723
Where is my flock?
550
01:18:05,764 --> 01:18:08,601
The women begged him
to bless them.
551
01:18:08,851 --> 01:18:10,644
So he started...
552
01:18:24,575 --> 01:18:28,996
Said goodbye and mother
went into the kitchen
553
01:18:29,288 --> 01:18:35,211
for some water... but in fact
to allow the young people...
554
01:18:41,050 --> 01:18:43,552
...a tender farewell.
555
01:19:06,075 --> 01:19:07,618
Alright,
556
01:19:08,827 --> 01:19:13,123
the compresses were good.
557
01:19:17,086 --> 01:19:20,798
Excuse me, a bit of cold.
558
01:19:22,049 --> 01:19:26,637
It's these night-time call-ins.
I shall listen to your lungs.
559
01:19:26,679 --> 01:19:28,889
Pull up your shirt.
560
01:19:35,229 --> 01:19:37,606
Breathe deeply.
561
01:19:48,117 --> 01:19:52,037
Those who drink, die.
Those who don't, die too.
562
01:19:52,162 --> 01:19:55,374
But who drinks our May lager
won't want to die!
563
01:20:00,129 --> 01:20:01,755
Mar ya?
564
01:20:41,712 --> 01:20:44,673
A common cold, that's all.
565
01:20:45,883 --> 01:20:47,426
I'll write...
566
01:20:49,345 --> 01:20:50,929
a prescription.
567
01:20:54,350 --> 01:20:56,602
Mornings are still cold.
568
01:20:56,685 --> 01:21:01,774
Three pills a day.
569
01:21:03,025 --> 01:21:05,652
Morning, afternoon and...
570
01:21:08,530 --> 01:21:10,824
...and evening. God bless.
571
01:21:11,075 --> 01:21:16,205
My husband bought me
a therapeutic fulguration apparatus.
572
01:21:17,623 --> 01:21:20,292
There's a cathode pipe for colds,
573
01:21:20,334 --> 01:21:24,546
eucalyptus oil,
fragrant pine-wood...
574
01:21:25,506 --> 01:21:28,384
A fulguration apparatus, you say?
575
01:21:28,842 --> 01:21:33,972
I'd sure like to see
this box of tricks!
576
01:21:37,017 --> 01:21:39,812
- You understand it?
- Of course.
577
01:21:40,354 --> 01:21:44,358
This is the eucalyptus oil,
it smells of resin.
578
01:21:46,068 --> 01:21:50,030
I shall place the ozone inhaler
in your nose,
579
01:21:51,240 --> 01:21:53,325
but you must lie down.
580
01:21:56,203 --> 01:22:01,125
- Do you feel the neon rays?
- How poetic.
581
01:22:01,542 --> 01:22:05,421
That's the ozone -
the scent of summer storms.
582
01:22:08,048 --> 01:22:12,136
Blue is your colour, mine too.
583
01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:17,850
Calms down the nerves,
slows down blood circulation.
584
01:22:20,894 --> 01:22:23,689
Yes, blue colour.
585
01:22:25,357 --> 01:22:28,360
And fragrant pinewood.
586
01:22:30,487 --> 01:22:32,531
What are you doing?
587
01:22:33,449 --> 01:22:35,742
Oh, God, what is it?
588
01:23:19,369 --> 01:23:22,539
Where is this oil
589
01:23:23,707 --> 01:23:26,460
with the pine-wood fragrance?
590
01:23:31,006 --> 01:23:35,594
Damn you woman,
should be diluted 1:10!
591
01:23:37,429 --> 01:23:40,182
Can you forgive me, Mr. Chairman.
592
01:23:43,602 --> 01:23:46,730
Were I not the brewery chairman,
593
01:23:50,317 --> 01:23:53,070
I would wish to be the manager.
594
01:24:01,495 --> 01:24:03,830
It was a poetic afternoon.
595
01:24:27,312 --> 01:24:29,398
It is good,
596
01:24:30,023 --> 01:24:34,069
as rehabilitation
I recommend cycling.
597
01:24:34,861 --> 01:24:37,531
But new times are here.
598
01:24:41,076 --> 01:24:43,161
Everything is short.
599
01:24:45,789 --> 01:24:47,791
Look outside.
600
01:24:50,836 --> 01:24:55,215
- I've cropped my stallion's tail.
- Indeed,
601
01:24:56,550 --> 01:24:58,760
you've cut it!
602
01:24:59,177 --> 01:25:00,637
All of it.
603
01:25:01,763 --> 01:25:03,849
And I trimmed...
604
01:25:05,142 --> 01:25:06,685
my moustache.
605
01:25:10,939 --> 01:25:12,649
Beautiful!
606
01:26:23,428 --> 01:26:26,890
This invention shortens distances
between people.
607
01:26:26,932 --> 01:26:32,854
Good people, our Agrarian Party
will fight for this invention.
608
01:26:33,438 --> 01:26:36,692
In a year or two this invention
609
01:26:36,983 --> 01:26:42,239
will be in very family,
for a reasonable price.
610
01:26:42,280 --> 01:26:47,119
- People will listen to the news...
- Pepin!
611
01:26:48,328 --> 01:26:51,623
My friends,
I don't want to jump to conclusions,
612
01:26:51,665 --> 01:26:57,462
but this device may allow us
to listen to news not only from Prague,
613
01:26:57,504 --> 01:27:00,465
even from Brno,
music from Pilsner.
614
01:27:00,507 --> 01:27:01,550
Pepin!
615
01:27:01,967 --> 01:27:07,639
Or - not wanting to exaggerate -
from as far as Paris!
616
01:27:09,057 --> 01:27:10,517
Pepin!
617
01:27:11,476 --> 01:27:12,894
Come up.
618
01:27:19,067 --> 01:27:23,447
- Shorten them!
- Great, we'll shorten everything!
619
01:27:26,366 --> 01:27:28,952
Time, distance.
620
01:27:30,954 --> 01:27:36,042
We'll make short work of it.
We'll cut it all short -
621
01:27:37,252 --> 01:27:39,504
it's shearing time!
622
01:27:39,713 --> 01:27:44,301
I'm afraid this apparatus
will not bring people happiness.
623
01:27:44,342 --> 01:27:48,138
- But our Agrarian party...
- What we mustn't cut short
624
01:27:48,597 --> 01:27:53,101
is our common sense, sister-in-law.
625
01:27:55,687 --> 01:27:59,816
Lucky, somebody's got some brains!
626
01:28:00,317 --> 01:28:03,111
I surprise myself.
627
01:28:03,653 --> 01:28:09,409
Mustn't cut people's rights though!
628
01:28:09,701 --> 01:28:12,829
Don't talk that way,
or they'll give you the sack!
629
01:28:12,871 --> 01:28:16,208
They can't -
'cause of our organization.
630
01:28:23,089 --> 01:28:27,886
We hereby cut ourselves off
from old Austrian Empire.
631
01:28:32,307 --> 01:28:35,352
You have a motor-cycle
of Czech make,
632
01:28:35,393 --> 01:28:39,189
now we have a Czech truck.
633
01:28:39,523 --> 01:28:41,775
Horses belong to the past.
634
01:28:41,817 --> 01:28:45,278
This truck replaces
two pairs of horses
635
01:28:45,320 --> 01:28:48,240
and will speed up
deliveries to remote places.
636
01:28:48,281 --> 01:28:51,034
Our horses will be off
to the slaughter-house.
637
01:28:51,076 --> 01:29:00,669
Our truck will shorten
the distance to village inns.
638
01:29:01,336 --> 01:29:05,549
Like a death in the family, Mr. Martin.
Take three days off.
639
01:29:16,309 --> 01:29:18,687
- Cut it off!
- What?
640
01:29:19,020 --> 01:29:21,022
Like this.
641
01:29:28,238 --> 01:29:29,906
No!
642
01:29:31,992 --> 01:29:36,955
I want it short,
like Josephine Baker.
643
01:29:45,589 --> 01:29:46,715
No!
644
01:30:31,593 --> 01:30:36,222
And now some proposals
for further improvements.
645
01:30:41,353 --> 01:30:43,271
So, gentlemen!
646
01:30:47,233 --> 01:30:52,864
We shall shorten the distance
to the cellars for the barrels.
647
01:30:53,698 --> 01:30:57,661
Master, we are shortening
the working-day, tell them.
648
01:30:58,912 --> 01:31:02,916
And we'll be cutting your
wages accordingly.
649
01:31:04,334 --> 01:31:06,544
- Now?
- Now.
650
01:31:24,938 --> 01:31:27,148
God, you're a magician!
651
01:31:28,191 --> 01:31:30,193
I feel so light!
652
01:31:48,503 --> 01:31:51,214
This cutting short is crazy,
653
01:31:51,256 --> 01:31:54,342
they've cut off the tails
of three dogs!
654
01:31:55,677 --> 01:31:58,054
She's shorten her hair!
655
01:32:00,724 --> 01:32:05,645
- And cut her skirt!
- A woman's bare knee
656
01:32:05,687 --> 01:32:08,189
is like a Temple of the Holy Ghost.
657
01:32:11,651 --> 01:32:16,156
- The brewery is prospering, but...
- It costs a lot of money.
658
01:32:16,197 --> 01:32:19,534
- These new-fangled improvements.
- And it lacks order.
659
01:32:19,576 --> 01:32:22,746
- Any goulash going?
- We will have to replace you!
660
01:32:22,787 --> 01:32:26,499
My wife complained
you didn't recognize her.
661
01:32:38,136 --> 01:32:39,846
Good afternoon.
662
01:32:44,601 --> 01:32:46,352
Where is your hair?
663
01:32:48,730 --> 01:32:50,482
Here.
664
01:33:03,661 --> 01:33:06,206
My tyres don't need pumping.
665
01:33:07,916 --> 01:33:10,210
The pump works.
666
01:34:02,470 --> 01:34:06,724
I bought this pump
at Runkasin Boleslav Street.
667
01:34:07,809 --> 01:34:10,895
Now we'll begin a new life.
668
01:34:11,688 --> 01:34:13,314
Yes.
669
01:34:14,607 --> 01:34:17,110
I think, Mr. Manager,
670
01:34:19,028 --> 01:34:21,614
that we'll give you another chance.
671
01:34:47,932 --> 01:34:52,020
The boat is long,
the oars are short
672
01:34:52,312 --> 01:34:56,983
Come my love,
we will go back
673
01:34:57,692 --> 01:35:05,325
We will go further,
to the green forest
674
01:35:31,517 --> 01:35:34,854
Francin,
I have something for you.
675
01:35:40,443 --> 01:35:42,195
Look for it!
676
01:35:47,617 --> 01:35:49,535
Cold...
677
01:35:52,664 --> 01:35:54,582
Warmer...
678
01:35:55,708 --> 01:35:57,168
Warmer...
679
01:36:04,384 --> 01:36:05,885
Hot!
680
01:36:09,305 --> 01:36:12,475
Here, I'm carrying
a budding author for you!
47797
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