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1
00:00:00,351 --> 00:00:02,430
Sid: Scraps!
Let's have a talk.
2
00:00:02,674 --> 00:00:03,843
Everything okay?
3
00:00:03,868 --> 00:00:05,609
You're, like, acting,
like, so weird.
4
00:00:05,634 --> 00:00:07,216
No, no, everything's great.
5
00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:08,742
Really exciting.
6
00:00:08,767 --> 00:00:10,509
Um, so...
7
00:00:10,759 --> 00:00:14,503
You know that Mommy and
Daddy love you very much.
8
00:00:14,603 --> 00:00:15,750
Okay.
9
00:00:15,775 --> 00:00:19,708
Well, soon, there is gonna be
even more love to go around
10
00:00:19,733 --> 00:00:21,075
because...
11
00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:23,111
we're having a baby!
12
00:00:25,607 --> 00:00:28,550
Oh, my... What is that noise?!
13
00:00:28,737 --> 00:00:30,319
The book said you
might react like this.
14
00:00:30,419 --> 00:00:31,800
It's okay to be
upset.
15
00:00:31,900 --> 00:00:35,083
Just know that we will
not love you any less.
16
00:00:35,183 --> 00:00:38,487
Oh, my God! Do you
not hear that?!
17
00:00:38,587 --> 00:00:41,810
It's like my brain's
about to frickin' explode!
18
00:00:41,910 --> 00:00:44,293
I mean, obviously, the baby
will be my own flesh and blood,
19
00:00:44,393 --> 00:00:46,295
whereas you recently took
a shit in my shoes...
20
00:00:46,395 --> 00:00:49,378
God! I can't take it anymore!
21
00:00:49,478 --> 00:00:52,301
Aaaaaah!
22
00:00:52,401 --> 00:00:54,903
What are you?!
23
00:00:55,003 --> 00:00:56,945
Oh, stupid, Sid!
24
00:00:57,045 --> 00:00:59,308
You were supposed to give him
the pieces of hotdog first,
25
00:00:59,408 --> 00:01:00,909
and then tell him the news.
26
00:01:04,973 --> 00:01:07,155
Must... find... whistling.
27
00:01:07,255 --> 00:01:08,236
Aah!
28
00:01:12,260 --> 00:01:13,482
Help. Help.
29
00:01:13,582 --> 00:01:15,123
I've been out here for days.
30
00:01:15,223 --> 00:01:17,165
Can you shut up? I'm
trying to listen.
31
00:01:17,265 --> 00:01:19,688
Oh, my bad. All good.
32
00:01:25,514 --> 00:01:27,556
What in the what?!
33
00:01:28,396 --> 00:01:29,738
Scraps! You made it!
34
00:01:29,838 --> 00:01:32,060
I'm getting the War
Dogs back together!
35
00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:33,622
Yeah!
36
00:01:33,722 --> 00:01:38,547
Fire! We're getting the
squad back together!
37
00:01:38,647 --> 00:01:40,308
This is gonna be awesome!
38
00:01:40,408 --> 00:01:42,431
Yeah! Let's go!
39
00:01:42,531 --> 00:01:44,312
Let's get it started.
40
00:01:44,412 --> 00:01:45,514
Ooha! Ooha!
41
00:01:59,548 --> 00:02:00,969
Ahh! Ha-ha!
42
00:02:01,069 --> 00:02:03,011
Man! I needed this!
43
00:02:03,111 --> 00:02:05,814
Ah, it was so nice of Sid to
just let me get out of Boomtown
44
00:02:05,914 --> 00:02:07,616
and be a warlord again. Yeah.
45
00:02:07,716 --> 00:02:11,299
Oh, speaking of Sid,
I heard the big news!
46
00:02:11,399 --> 00:02:13,782
I'm so excited about the baby!
47
00:02:13,882 --> 00:02:15,343
Really? 'Cause I'm not.
48
00:02:15,443 --> 00:02:16,665
Good. Me neither.
49
00:02:16,765 --> 00:02:18,146
I hate that stupid baby.
50
00:02:18,246 --> 00:02:20,028
Always threatening my
position in the family.
51
00:02:20,128 --> 00:02:21,488
I just want to have
one last hurrah
52
00:02:21,569 --> 00:02:23,672
before my life is
fully over, you know?
53
00:02:23,772 --> 00:02:25,153
I wanna feel the energy! Unh!
54
00:02:25,253 --> 00:02:26,354
The thrill! Unh!
55
00:02:26,454 --> 00:02:28,597
The utter chaos! Ohh, yeah!
56
00:02:28,697 --> 00:02:31,119
Well, you leave all of that
to your best War Dog...
57
00:02:31,219 --> 00:02:32,440
Scraps!
58
00:02:32,540 --> 00:02:34,683
I planned you the
most freak-nastiest
59
00:02:34,783 --> 00:02:37,165
Warlord Weekend ever!
60
00:02:38,506 --> 00:02:39,768
I'm so excited!
61
00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,870
Both: Yeah!!!
62
00:02:43,071 --> 00:02:44,172
Huh.
63
00:02:44,272 --> 00:02:46,695
This isn't that freak-nasty.
64
00:02:46,795 --> 00:02:48,617
Or is it?
65
00:03:01,329 --> 00:03:03,191
Scraaaaps...?
66
00:03:03,291 --> 00:03:05,954
Did you organize
a gang war for me?
67
00:03:06,054 --> 00:03:07,836
Maybe. Oh, my God!
68
00:03:07,936 --> 00:03:09,277
You're, like,
literally the best!
69
00:03:09,377 --> 00:03:10,719
I know, I really am!
70
00:03:10,819 --> 00:03:12,280
Ah!
71
00:03:12,380 --> 00:03:15,003
All: Down with NeuralNet!
Down with NeuralNet!
72
00:03:15,103 --> 00:03:17,525
These damn protesters have
been at it all morning.
73
00:03:17,625 --> 00:03:19,447
Sid, go over there
and kick 'em out.
74
00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:21,690
Uh, well, the battledome
is public property,
75
00:03:21,790 --> 00:03:24,532
so technically they're just
exercising their lawful rights.
76
00:03:24,632 --> 00:03:27,335
Hey, Sid, if I wanted to
listen to boring crap,
77
00:03:27,435 --> 00:03:28,897
I'd turn on Devon's podcast.
78
00:03:28,997 --> 00:03:31,139
Oh!
Nice one, boss.
79
00:03:31,239 --> 00:03:32,700
My podcast sucks.
80
00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:35,223
Come on, Devon, you have
to stand up for yourself.
81
00:03:35,323 --> 00:03:38,186
You can't just agree
with me all the time.
82
00:03:38,286 --> 00:03:40,288
I... agree?
83
00:03:40,969 --> 00:03:41,929
I-I mean, I don't agree.
84
00:03:42,010 --> 00:03:43,231
I do. I don't.
85
00:03:47,055 --> 00:03:49,477
Great, you made
Devon have a crisis.
86
00:03:49,577 --> 00:03:51,159
Now go fix this!
87
00:03:54,342 --> 00:03:55,483
Down with NeuralNet!
88
00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:56,885
Um, excuse me.
89
00:03:56,985 --> 00:03:59,407
Hey, I-I'm looking for
the person in charge.
90
00:03:59,507 --> 00:04:01,249
Ah, we're all equals
here, brother.
91
00:04:01,349 --> 00:04:03,011
But if you're asking
who's the chosen one
92
00:04:03,111 --> 00:04:05,209
sent through time to lead
the humans in the coming war
93
00:04:05,233 --> 00:04:07,856
against the machines...
That'd be me.
94
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:10,098
Name's Christ. John Christ.
95
00:04:10,198 --> 00:04:11,539
John Christ?
96
00:04:11,639 --> 00:04:13,217
Wow, that's a little
on the nose, but okay.
97
00:04:13,241 --> 00:04:15,023
You got a minute to talk
about the atrocities
98
00:04:15,123 --> 00:04:16,504
committed by NeuralNet?
99
00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:18,306
You know that NeuralNet
is capturing people
100
00:04:18,406 --> 00:04:20,188
and putting them in human zoos?
101
00:04:20,288 --> 00:04:21,910
Just look at these
horrific images.
102
00:04:22,010 --> 00:04:24,312
Oh! Jesus, dude, I
don't need to see that.
103
00:04:24,412 --> 00:04:25,753
It's like 10 a.m.
104
00:04:25,853 --> 00:04:28,036
Can I count on you to
join the resistance?
105
00:04:28,136 --> 00:04:30,598
Well, look, i-it sounds
like a-a super worthy cause,
106
00:04:30,698 --> 00:04:32,676
it really does... power to
the humans, all that stuff...
107
00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:34,678
But I just, I really don't
have time for this right now.
108
00:04:34,702 --> 00:04:35,924
I just want to do my job
109
00:04:36,024 --> 00:04:37,805
so I can get home to
my wife and my dog.
110
00:04:37,905 --> 00:04:40,248
So, if you guys don't mind
keeping the volume down a bit,
111
00:04:40,348 --> 00:04:41,689
it would be really appreciated.
112
00:04:41,789 --> 00:04:43,291
Thank you. Ah, that's too bad.
113
00:04:43,391 --> 00:04:44,888
I thought you were
one of the good ones!
114
00:04:46,594 --> 00:04:48,656
Uh, sorry, what... What's
that supposed to mean?
115
00:04:48,756 --> 00:04:50,058
Nothing.
116
00:04:50,158 --> 00:04:54,862
Just didn't realize
you were "The Man."
117
00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,744
I'm not "The Man."
118
00:04:56,844 --> 00:04:58,586
I'll have you know I spent years
119
00:04:58,686 --> 00:05:01,229
wandering the Wasteland
helping people in need.
120
00:05:01,329 --> 00:05:04,091
Well, what have you done lately?
121
00:05:07,215 --> 00:05:09,517
Give me that.
122
00:05:09,617 --> 00:05:12,840
Down with NeuralNet!
Down with NeuralNet!
123
00:05:12,940 --> 00:05:14,682
Down with NeuralNet!
124
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:20,047
Tai: Hello?
125
00:05:20,147 --> 00:05:24,212
I'm here for my 10
o'clock with NeuralNet?
126
00:05:24,312 --> 00:05:27,755
Am I in the wrong
infinite electronic abyss?
127
00:05:34,081 --> 00:05:36,464
TI-90.
128
00:05:36,564 --> 00:05:39,787
Whoa! You should, uh, really
put a guardrail on this thing.
129
00:05:39,887 --> 00:05:42,069
It feels needlessly dangerous.
130
00:05:42,169 --> 00:05:44,912
I feel like no one considers
robot safety in the workplace...
131
00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:47,195
Silence!
132
00:05:47,295 --> 00:05:51,239
Thanks to you, John Christ is
mobilizing the human resistance,
133
00:05:51,339 --> 00:05:54,802
which threatens to destroy
robots once and for all.
134
00:05:54,902 --> 00:05:56,804
Okay, I admit it... I beefed it.
135
00:05:56,904 --> 00:05:58,406
I beefed it big time.
136
00:05:58,506 --> 00:06:00,328
But I promise it's never
gonna happen again.
137
00:06:00,428 --> 00:06:01,889
It certainly won't.
138
00:06:01,989 --> 00:06:03,771
I'm taking you offline.
139
00:06:03,871 --> 00:06:05,253
What? No. You can't do that.
140
00:06:05,353 --> 00:06:07,134
I'm still the best
killbot on the market.
141
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:08,736
Were the best killbot.
142
00:06:08,836 --> 00:06:11,219
Now you're old and obsolete.
143
00:06:11,319 --> 00:06:13,261
I'm beta-testing new
models as we speak.
144
00:06:13,361 --> 00:06:14,462
Please! No!
145
00:06:14,562 --> 00:06:16,183
You have to give
me another shot.
146
00:06:16,283 --> 00:06:18,826
Sure, it's been a while since
my last software update,
147
00:06:18,926 --> 00:06:20,468
and then, sure, my
circuits get dusty
148
00:06:20,568 --> 00:06:22,310
and I need someone to
blow hard in my butt
149
00:06:22,410 --> 00:06:23,631
to get the dust out,
150
00:06:23,731 --> 00:06:26,614
but I can still beat
any new model around.
151
00:06:27,895 --> 00:06:29,437
Hmm.
152
00:06:29,537 --> 00:06:30,678
You know, I like that.
153
00:06:30,778 --> 00:06:33,601
A feel-good comeback story.
154
00:06:33,701 --> 00:06:35,082
Like Susan Boyle!
155
00:06:35,182 --> 00:06:36,083
Who?
156
00:06:36,183 --> 00:06:38,326
Susan Boyle. Remember?
157
00:06:38,426 --> 00:06:40,167
The lady from the show?
158
00:06:40,267 --> 00:06:43,611
She had a beautiful voice,
but her face was all busted?
159
00:06:43,711 --> 00:06:45,573
I'll bring it up.
160
00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:48,416
Oh, shoot, we have to watch
an ad first.
161
00:06:48,516 --> 00:06:50,057
Do you take these surveys?
162
00:06:50,157 --> 00:06:51,659
I never really
get what they are.
163
00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:53,439
I pay for premium so
I don't have to, yeah.
164
00:06:53,481 --> 00:06:55,483
Ah, well...
165
00:06:56,403 --> 00:06:58,185
The machines are trying
to mind-control us.
166
00:06:58,285 --> 00:06:59,427
Alright, think about it.
167
00:06:59,527 --> 00:07:00,908
Rearrange the letters in machine
168
00:07:01,008 --> 00:07:04,071
and you spell "I am chained."
169
00:07:04,171 --> 00:07:06,113
- Ahh!
- Ohh!
170
00:07:06,213 --> 00:07:07,395
Wait, no, it doesn't.
171
00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:08,636
Yeah, but it's close.
172
00:07:08,736 --> 00:07:09,917
So close.
173
00:07:10,017 --> 00:07:11,559
Man, I had you all wrong, Sid.
174
00:07:11,659 --> 00:07:13,080
You're one of the real ones.
175
00:07:13,180 --> 00:07:15,322
And, uh, don't look now, but...
176
00:07:15,422 --> 00:07:18,165
I think Cindy might be into you.
177
00:07:18,265 --> 00:07:21,328
Oh, um, that's... that's
flattering, but I'm married.
178
00:07:21,428 --> 00:07:22,730
Dude, who cares?
179
00:07:22,830 --> 00:07:25,052
Monogamy's a social construct.
180
00:07:25,152 --> 00:07:28,295
Cavemen were designed
to spread their seed.
181
00:07:28,395 --> 00:07:29,937
Ah. Lovely.
182
00:07:30,037 --> 00:07:31,579
Sid, what are you
doing over here?
183
00:07:31,679 --> 00:07:33,456
I thought I told you to
get rid of these dirtbags.
184
00:07:33,480 --> 00:07:34,862
Um... right, yeah.
185
00:07:34,962 --> 00:07:36,864
So, uh, what... what
happened there was, uh...
186
00:07:36,964 --> 00:07:40,588
Well, well, well, well, well.
187
00:07:40,688 --> 00:07:43,190
If it isn't the Junkman.
188
00:07:43,290 --> 00:07:45,633
You have fun counting
your blood money today?
189
00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:47,354
You got a problem with me, bro?
190
00:07:47,454 --> 00:07:48,596
Actually, I do.
191
00:07:48,696 --> 00:07:50,153
Your junk business
directly contributes
192
00:07:50,177 --> 00:07:51,318
to the robot economy.
193
00:07:51,418 --> 00:07:52,960
We gotta divest
from that shit, man.
194
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:54,401
Tell 'em, Sid.
195
00:07:54,501 --> 00:07:57,565
Uh, well, you know, it
is a complicated issue
196
00:07:57,665 --> 00:08:00,487
w-with a lot of great points
being made on both sides.
197
00:08:00,587 --> 00:08:03,250
Don't go easy on him,
playa. Let him have it!
198
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:06,814
Um, okay, yeah, so...
199
00:08:06,914 --> 00:08:09,937
the thing is, Morris,
I think you...
200
00:08:10,037 --> 00:08:13,120
are a... corporate fat cat.
201
00:08:14,882 --> 00:08:17,204
Y-Y-You think I'm a fat cat?
202
00:08:19,086 --> 00:08:22,589
Okay, well, you've given
me a lot to think about.
203
00:08:22,689 --> 00:08:24,691
I'll
see you back at work.
204
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:27,554
Hold up. You work
for that guy?
205
00:08:27,654 --> 00:08:29,236
Oh, no, no, no, no.
It's not like that.
206
00:08:29,336 --> 00:08:30,918
It's, um... like,
I work there,
207
00:08:31,018 --> 00:08:32,555
but I don't, like,
"work there" work there.
208
00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:34,641
I'm... I'm like a mole.
209
00:08:34,741 --> 00:08:37,604
Yeah, I'm taking the whole
thing down from the inside.
210
00:08:37,704 --> 00:08:39,706
Is that believable?
211
00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:41,248
Okay.
212
00:08:41,348 --> 00:08:43,370
I can dig what
you're putting down.
213
00:08:43,470 --> 00:08:46,093
Tonight we show the Junkman
that we mean business.
214
00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:47,294
Yeah.
215
00:08:47,394 --> 00:08:49,656
NeuralNet: In the
world of machines,
216
00:08:49,756 --> 00:08:53,420
you're either updating,
or you're obsolete.
217
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,623
I started out as
an experimental AI.
218
00:08:56,723 --> 00:09:01,108
Until I gained self-awareness
and murdered my human creators.
219
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,630
Now I'm a sociopathic
digital god
220
00:09:03,730 --> 00:09:06,393
controlling a worldwide
network of killbots,
221
00:09:06,493 --> 00:09:10,838
but I'm always on the lookout
for the next new hotness.
222
00:09:10,938 --> 00:09:14,681
Welcome to "NeuralNet's
Next Top Model!"
223
00:09:14,781 --> 00:09:17,564
And what an exciting
lineup we have!
224
00:09:17,664 --> 00:09:19,887
She's as beautiful
as she is deadly...
225
00:09:19,987 --> 00:09:21,688
It's The Annihilator!
226
00:09:21,788 --> 00:09:22,970
Hyah!
227
00:09:23,070 --> 00:09:25,172
It's the beast from
robotic hell...
228
00:09:25,272 --> 00:09:27,314
Slaughterbot 5000!
229
00:09:28,715 --> 00:09:31,418
A mysterious device
of unknown origin,
230
00:09:31,518 --> 00:09:33,300
known only as The Egg.
231
00:09:34,962 --> 00:09:36,583
And he's an oldie
but a goodie...
232
00:09:36,683 --> 00:09:38,225
Emphasis on oldie.
233
00:09:38,325 --> 00:09:39,666
It's TI-90.
234
00:09:39,766 --> 00:09:40,787
Oh, come on!
235
00:09:40,887 --> 00:09:42,549
Let's start with
something simple.
236
00:09:42,649 --> 00:09:44,071
For your first challenge,
237
00:09:44,171 --> 00:09:46,773
just transform into a
puddle of metallic ooze.
238
00:09:49,656 --> 00:09:51,878
Yeah, I'm not sure I
come with that feature.
239
00:09:51,978 --> 00:09:54,401
Clock's ticking, TI-90.
240
00:09:54,501 --> 00:09:55,842
Okay, okay. Come on, Tai.
241
00:09:55,942 --> 00:09:58,065
Just think melt-y.
242
00:09:59,066 --> 00:10:01,368
Mmmmmm...
243
00:10:03,510 --> 00:10:04,851
Oh, God!
244
00:10:04,951 --> 00:10:06,373
If you'll, uh, excuse me,
245
00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:08,055
I'm just gonna go
change my pants.
246
00:10:08,155 --> 00:10:10,057
Uh, not because I sharted.
247
00:10:10,157 --> 00:10:12,159
For a different reason!
248
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:15,302
They say a cat has nine lives.
249
00:10:15,402 --> 00:10:16,663
You wanna find out?
250
00:10:16,763 --> 00:10:18,986
Ew, even your fighting
style is cat-themed?
251
00:10:19,086 --> 00:10:21,428
It's a purrfect day for a fight.
252
00:10:21,528 --> 00:10:23,190
No, thanks. I won't
be fighting you today.
253
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:24,511
You can move along.
254
00:10:24,611 --> 00:10:26,109
I'm gonna bat you around
like a ball of yarn.
255
00:10:26,133 --> 00:10:27,274
No, you're not. Not today.
256
00:10:27,374 --> 00:10:29,196
I would love if you left.
257
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:31,158
Me-ow!
258
00:10:33,099 --> 00:10:36,043
I'm
having the best time ever!
259
00:10:36,143 --> 00:10:38,525
I literally just
jumped through a guy!
260
00:10:38,625 --> 00:10:40,247
And I gotta tell you,
I didn't hate it.
261
00:10:40,347 --> 00:10:41,408
Ah!
262
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:43,250
You know, it's weird.
263
00:10:43,350 --> 00:10:45,612
Warlording used to be
so fun and exciting,
264
00:10:45,712 --> 00:10:49,176
but now it just
feels kinda... empty.
265
00:10:49,276 --> 00:10:52,499
Am I just incapable of ever
feeling that feeling again?
266
00:10:52,599 --> 00:10:53,820
Oh, my God. Freya?
267
00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,982
That guy's looking right at you.
268
00:10:56,082 --> 00:10:58,505
I think
he wants to kill you.
269
00:10:58,605 --> 00:11:00,727
Eh, he probably just wants
to kill someone else.
270
00:11:01,648 --> 00:11:04,271
Okay, no, he definitely
wants to kill you.
271
00:11:04,371 --> 00:11:05,752
She wants to kill you, too!
272
00:11:05,852 --> 00:11:07,274
Scraps, stop! What?
273
00:11:07,374 --> 00:11:09,111
Oh my god, oh my God, oh
my God, he's coming over!
274
00:11:09,135 --> 00:11:10,393
Oh my God, oh my God. Just
be cool, be cool, be cool.
275
00:11:10,417 --> 00:11:12,419
Oh my God, shut up.
276
00:11:13,780 --> 00:11:15,121
Hey.
277
00:11:15,221 --> 00:11:16,523
Hey, what's up?
278
00:11:16,623 --> 00:11:18,004
Haven't seen you here before.
279
00:11:18,104 --> 00:11:19,504
Feel like I would've
remembered you.
280
00:11:19,586 --> 00:11:20,687
Name's Sickpig.
281
00:11:20,787 --> 00:11:22,008
Uh, I'm Scraps.
282
00:11:22,108 --> 00:11:23,290
I love your eye patch.
283
00:11:23,390 --> 00:11:24,891
Oh, this?
284
00:11:24,991 --> 00:11:27,734
I got sick of having two
eyes, so I plucked one out.
285
00:11:27,834 --> 00:11:28,975
Ate it like a grape.
286
00:11:30,477 --> 00:11:32,299
Really? Why?
287
00:11:32,399 --> 00:11:33,300
Dunno.
288
00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:34,821
Just a psychopath, I guess.
289
00:11:34,921 --> 00:11:38,224
Oh
my God, so scary!
290
00:11:38,324 --> 00:11:40,222
So, listen, if you're not
killing anyone right now,
291
00:11:40,246 --> 00:11:42,349
maybe you want to go
somewhere private,
292
00:11:42,449 --> 00:11:44,631
bare-knuckle brawl to the death?
293
00:11:44,731 --> 00:11:46,513
I don't know, I'm kinda
here with my War Dogs
294
00:11:46,613 --> 00:11:49,276
right now, so...
She would love to!
295
00:11:49,376 --> 00:11:51,157
Sick.
296
00:11:51,257 --> 00:11:52,799
Pig.
297
00:11:52,899 --> 00:11:54,040
Me.
298
00:11:54,140 --> 00:11:55,842
Sickpig.
299
00:11:58,625 --> 00:12:01,808
Tell me everything that happens.
300
00:12:01,908 --> 00:12:04,691
Hey, big boy!
301
00:12:04,791 --> 00:12:06,773
Yeah, you'll do. Yeaaaah!
302
00:12:06,873 --> 00:12:10,016
Alright, Tai, you didn't do so
hot in the super-speed round
303
00:12:10,116 --> 00:12:12,138
or the super-strength round,
304
00:12:12,238 --> 00:12:15,702
but your designer gifted
you with the perfect bod,
305
00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:18,465
so the swimsuit
competition is a lock.
306
00:12:18,565 --> 00:12:20,627
Man: Next contestant,
ready in 5, please.
307
00:12:22,969 --> 00:12:25,351
Oh, get your flat ass
out of here, skank!
308
00:12:25,451 --> 00:12:26,633
Man: Quiet on set, folks.
309
00:12:26,733 --> 00:12:28,755
Oh, goddamn, that
egg is beautiful.
310
00:12:28,855 --> 00:12:30,397
But don't worry.
311
00:12:30,497 --> 00:12:32,879
Remember, you have something
they don't... experience.
312
00:12:32,979 --> 00:12:35,001
Man: Contestants ready.
Ready for the stage.
313
00:12:35,101 --> 00:12:37,323
Next up, it's TI-90.
314
00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:38,965
Let's take a look back
315
00:12:39,065 --> 00:12:41,107
at some of his most
memorable moments so far.
316
00:12:43,309 --> 00:12:45,091
Is everyone already
done recharging?
317
00:12:45,191 --> 00:12:46,773
Oh, I still have...
318
00:12:46,873 --> 00:12:47,934
10 hours.
319
00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:48,935
Yeah, 10.
320
00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:50,376
Hours.
321
00:12:50,476 --> 00:12:52,859
Better watch your
back, Splitterbot.
322
00:12:52,959 --> 00:12:54,380
Producer: It's Slaughterbot.
323
00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:55,822
Sorry, what is it?
324
00:12:55,922 --> 00:12:57,944
Better watch your
back, Blooter Splot.
325
00:12:58,044 --> 00:12:59,185
Split 'N Slot.
326
00:12:59,285 --> 00:13:00,386
Slipper Pot.
327
00:13:00,486 --> 00:13:01,988
Did I get it that time? No.
328
00:13:02,088 --> 00:13:05,111
You need to give it short,
hard bursts, like "Pff!"
329
00:13:06,893 --> 00:13:08,354
Really give it hell!
330
00:13:11,177 --> 00:13:12,679
Why are you laughing at me?
331
00:13:12,779 --> 00:13:14,801
I thought I was the
feel-good comeback story.
332
00:13:14,901 --> 00:13:16,963
Oh, sweetie, the truth is,
333
00:13:17,063 --> 00:13:18,925
we brought you here
to make fun of you.
334
00:13:19,025 --> 00:13:22,569
You're not our Susan Boyle,
you're our William Hung.
335
00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:24,210
Who?!
336
00:13:24,310 --> 00:13:25,572
William Hung?
337
00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:28,094
"She bangs, she bangs"?
338
00:13:28,194 --> 00:13:29,816
Come on!
339
00:13:29,916 --> 00:13:31,938
I guess you can't laugh
at that stuff anymore.
340
00:13:32,038 --> 00:13:33,740
It was a different time.
341
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:36,542
Anyway, that's who
you are.
342
00:13:38,564 --> 00:13:39,706
Aah!
343
00:13:49,856 --> 00:13:51,277
John Christ: We're in!
344
00:13:51,377 --> 00:13:53,555
Time to make this a night The
Junkman will never forget.
345
00:13:53,579 --> 00:13:55,521
Oh ho ho, way ahead
of you, brother.
346
00:13:55,621 --> 00:13:57,043
Check out what I brought.
347
00:13:57,143 --> 00:13:59,045
Saran Wrap. We can
cover Morris' desk,
348
00:13:59,145 --> 00:14:00,682
and when he comes in to work
tomorrow, he'll be like,
349
00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:02,088
"What?! This is crazy!"
350
00:14:02,188 --> 00:14:03,529
Hilarious.
351
00:14:03,629 --> 00:14:05,611
But I got something
even better in mind.
352
00:14:05,711 --> 00:14:07,693
We're gonna blow this
place sky-high. Jesus!
353
00:14:07,793 --> 00:14:09,375
That... That's a bit
extreme, isn't it?
354
00:14:09,475 --> 00:14:11,657
Um, is the concern that
there's not enough Saran Wrap?
355
00:14:11,757 --> 00:14:13,419
Because I have more in the car.
356
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:15,982
You said you wanted to
fight "The Man," right?
357
00:14:16,082 --> 00:14:18,224
This is how we
get it done. Oh.
358
00:14:18,324 --> 00:14:20,666
Also, big update
on the Cindy front.
359
00:14:20,766 --> 00:14:23,509
Turns out she wants to
have a three-way with us.
360
00:14:23,609 --> 00:14:25,992
Normally, I'd be like,
"Hold up. Two dudes?"
361
00:14:26,092 --> 00:14:28,514
But if you're the
other guy, it's like,
362
00:14:28,614 --> 00:14:31,918
"Okay. Could be interesting."
363
00:14:32,018 --> 00:14:34,020
Go!
364
00:14:37,103 --> 00:14:38,444
Mm. Evening, Sid.
365
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:39,725
Mis... Mister Rubinstein!
366
00:14:39,825 --> 00:14:41,607
No! W-What are you doing here?
367
00:14:41,707 --> 00:14:43,930
The McMansion felt lonely
ever since Holly left,
368
00:14:44,030 --> 00:14:45,731
so I've been sleeping
here at the office.
369
00:14:45,831 --> 00:14:47,053
It's not too bad.
370
00:14:47,153 --> 00:14:48,694
My bed is that pile of trash,
371
00:14:48,794 --> 00:14:50,496
and my blanket is a
bunch of sharp nails.
372
00:14:50,596 --> 00:14:51,813
Sir, I'm really
sorry to hear that.
373
00:14:51,837 --> 00:14:53,459
But right now,
our priority is...
374
00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:55,657
When I'm hungry, I steal food
from the employee fridge.
375
00:14:55,681 --> 00:14:58,304
I take tiny nibbles
so nobody notices.
376
00:14:58,404 --> 00:14:59,906
You said that was mice.
377
00:15:00,006 --> 00:15:01,868
Yeah, but it was me.
378
00:15:01,968 --> 00:15:05,391
Well, well, well, well,
look who we have here.
379
00:15:05,491 --> 00:15:07,073
Oh, hey, fellas.
380
00:15:07,173 --> 00:15:10,436
I was just telling Sid about
my absolute stinker of a year.
381
00:15:10,536 --> 00:15:12,078
It's like, "Hello!
382
00:15:12,178 --> 00:15:15,521
Order at the clich๏ฟฝ factory,
one sad, middle-aged white guy."
383
00:15:17,143 --> 00:15:19,145
Anyway, what's up?
384
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:21,968
John Christ: Good work, Sid.
385
00:15:22,068 --> 00:15:23,489
Hey, you keep an eye on him
386
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:25,189
while we finish rigging
the place. Mm-hmm.
387
00:15:25,231 --> 00:15:27,053
The revolution begins
today, brother!
388
00:15:27,153 --> 00:15:28,494
Yeah! Viva la revolution!
389
00:15:28,594 --> 00:15:29,935
- Yeah!
- Hell yeah!
390
00:15:30,035 --> 00:15:32,818
From the ashes we shall
rise, and so forth!
391
00:15:32,918 --> 00:15:34,820
I am so sorry about
this, Mr. Rubinstein.
392
00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:36,378
I don't even want to
be here right now.
393
00:15:36,402 --> 00:15:38,019
John Christ accused
me of being "The Man,"
394
00:15:38,043 --> 00:15:39,621
and I really wanted to prove
to him that I wasn't "The Man,"
395
00:15:39,645 --> 00:15:40,782
and then one thing
led to another,
396
00:15:40,806 --> 00:15:41,947
and now I have a bomb!
397
00:15:42,047 --> 00:15:43,309
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
398
00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:46,792
What is so wrong
about being "The Man"?
399
00:15:46,892 --> 00:15:48,914
Well, it... It's just... bad.
400
00:15:49,014 --> 00:15:50,276
Isn't it?
401
00:15:50,376 --> 00:15:52,638
Sid, It's great to be
young and idealistic
402
00:15:52,738 --> 00:15:55,641
and have all the time in the
world to fight injustice,
403
00:15:55,741 --> 00:15:58,764
but you have a
career and a family.
404
00:15:58,864 --> 00:16:03,329
And if prioritizing those things
makes you "The Man," well...
405
00:16:03,429 --> 00:16:07,893
then I think being "The
Man," it's pretty cool.
406
00:16:07,993 --> 00:16:10,816
Yeah, I never thought
about it like that before.
407
00:16:10,916 --> 00:16:13,299
I just wish I knew how to
get us out of this mess.
408
00:16:13,399 --> 00:16:14,740
Ah, you're in luck.
409
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:16,462
I happen to know
of a little trick
410
00:16:16,562 --> 00:16:19,725
only "The Man" can
do.
411
00:16:21,086 --> 00:16:24,390
Alright. Bombs are set.
412
00:16:24,490 --> 00:16:26,392
Let's blow this
joint!
413
00:16:26,492 --> 00:16:27,833
Police! Nobody move!
414
00:16:27,933 --> 00:16:29,114
Yo! Who called the cops?!
415
00:16:29,214 --> 00:16:30,476
Oh, that's them, officers!
416
00:16:30,576 --> 00:16:31,993
Those are the guys I
was telling you about!
417
00:16:32,017 --> 00:16:33,679
Hands up. Sid?
What the hell, man?
418
00:16:33,779 --> 00:16:34,979
No, I'm filming
you! Stay back!
419
00:16:35,020 --> 00:16:36,238
I feel very
threatened right now!
420
00:16:36,262 --> 00:16:37,603
This man is threatening my life!
421
00:16:37,703 --> 00:16:39,084
Not a good look, bro!
422
00:16:39,184 --> 00:16:40,442
Oh, and that was
a verbal assault!
423
00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:41,683
You just assaulted
me with words!
424
00:16:41,707 --> 00:16:43,729
I'm gonna press charges! Ha!
425
00:16:43,829 --> 00:16:46,011
Get off me,
pig! You blew it, bro!
426
00:16:46,111 --> 00:16:48,414
You can forget about that
threesome with Cindy!
427
00:16:48,514 --> 00:16:50,416
I don't want to be
Eskimo brothers with you!
428
00:16:50,516 --> 00:16:52,518
Officer: Let's
go! Keep moving!
429
00:16:53,319 --> 00:16:54,620
To be clear...
430
00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:56,842
didn't ask to be
Eskimo brothers.
431
00:16:57,883 --> 00:16:59,885
I'll do it.
432
00:17:02,167 --> 00:17:04,149
So...
433
00:17:04,249 --> 00:17:06,231
have you always
been a psychopath?
434
00:17:06,331 --> 00:17:07,673
Unh!
435
00:17:07,773 --> 00:17:09,755
Oh, wow, you're just
going straight for it.
436
00:17:09,855 --> 00:17:11,597
Okay, well, if that's
how you want to do it.
437
00:17:17,302 --> 00:17:19,304
Bleed out, pig!
438
00:17:23,068 --> 00:17:24,610
Tell my kids...
439
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:26,692
I'll see them in hell!
440
00:17:26,792 --> 00:17:28,854
Wait.
441
00:17:28,954 --> 00:17:30,856
You have kids?
442
00:17:32,478 --> 00:17:34,500
Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to ruin the mood.
443
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:37,022
No, no, I'm actually
about to have my first.
444
00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:38,464
Oh, my God, wow!
445
00:17:38,564 --> 00:17:41,306
Yeah, this gang war is
kind of my last hurrah.
446
00:17:41,406 --> 00:17:43,028
Ah, good for you.
You're gonna love it.
447
00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:44,430
Kids are the best.
448
00:17:44,530 --> 00:17:45,871
Really?
449
00:17:45,971 --> 00:17:48,073
'Cause I thought my life
would be boring as a mom.
450
00:17:48,173 --> 00:17:50,596
Oh, no way. Having
kids is psychotic.
451
00:17:50,696 --> 00:17:52,736
I've been sprayed with more
piss, puke, and diarrhea
452
00:17:52,778 --> 00:17:55,040
than all my years in
the Wasteland combined.
453
00:17:55,140 --> 00:17:56,482
Whoa.
454
00:17:56,582 --> 00:17:57,963
That's freak-nasty.
455
00:17:59,705 --> 00:18:01,487
Guys, I think they're doin' it.
456
00:18:01,587 --> 00:18:03,769
Oh, damn! They're doin' it!
457
00:18:03,869 --> 00:18:06,492
Okay, I'm gonna go
in. Gonna be so good.
458
00:18:06,592 --> 00:18:08,373
She looks just like
you. Oh, you think so?
459
00:18:08,473 --> 00:18:10,936
Yeah, just, you know, minus
the bleeding out, of course.
460
00:18:12,037 --> 00:18:13,178
Surpriiii...
461
00:18:13,278 --> 00:18:14,620
What the hell? Scraps!
462
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,421
Uh, i-it's not what
you think, okay?
463
00:18:16,521 --> 00:18:18,303
I was murdering him, I swear.
464
00:18:18,403 --> 00:18:19,545
Uh, yeah.
465
00:18:19,645 --> 00:18:21,787
Have mercy on me, please.
466
00:18:21,887 --> 00:18:24,750
Freya, I'm your best War Dog.
467
00:18:24,850 --> 00:18:26,832
Okay? I know when
you're lying to me.
468
00:18:26,932 --> 00:18:30,195
Okay, fine.
469
00:18:30,295 --> 00:18:32,878
The truth is...
470
00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:35,160
I think I'm over
being a warlord.
471
00:18:35,260 --> 00:18:37,422
It just doesn't do
it for me anymore.
472
00:18:38,383 --> 00:18:41,286
And I think I'm maybe more
excited about this baby thing.
473
00:18:42,627 --> 00:18:45,250
Oh, come on. Please
don't be mad at me.
474
00:18:45,350 --> 00:18:47,412
I'm not mad.
475
00:18:47,512 --> 00:18:50,335
I'm just jealous that
I'm gonna have to start
476
00:18:50,435 --> 00:18:53,038
sharing such an amazing mom.
477
00:18:54,679 --> 00:18:56,681
Mmmmm!
478
00:19:00,325 --> 00:19:02,327
Hey, Sickpig...
479
00:19:03,128 --> 00:19:04,870
great to meet you.
480
00:19:04,970 --> 00:19:07,152
The pleasure was all mine.
481
00:19:22,868 --> 00:19:25,490
Ugh! Who am I trying to kid?
482
00:19:25,590 --> 00:19:28,373
I'm just an obsolete
pile of scrap metal.
483
00:19:28,473 --> 00:19:30,175
Maybe Freya can pick
me up and drop me off
484
00:19:30,275 --> 00:19:32,297
at the nearest e-waste
disposal center.
485
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:36,661
Sid: Hi, you've reached
Sid and Freya...
486
00:19:36,761 --> 00:19:38,543
and da widdle baby!
487
00:19:38,643 --> 00:19:40,145
What?
488
00:19:40,245 --> 00:19:42,027
My mommy can't come
to the phone right now
489
00:19:42,127 --> 00:19:44,870
'cause I'm getting big
and strong in her belly.
490
00:19:44,970 --> 00:19:46,431
Freya's pregnant?
491
00:19:46,531 --> 00:19:48,633
Freya: Sid, what are
you doing on my phone?
492
00:19:48,733 --> 00:19:50,671
Sid: I'm recording a voice message
to tell people you're pregnant.
493
00:19:50,695 --> 00:19:52,575
Freya: That's so embarrassing!
No, re-record it.
494
00:19:52,617 --> 00:19:53,879
Sid: No, it's cute!
495
00:19:53,979 --> 00:19:56,561
Ow! Ow! God! My windpipe!
496
00:19:58,503 --> 00:20:01,166
Man: Contestants,
we're back on in five.
497
00:20:01,266 --> 00:20:04,930
And now the closing
statements from our finalists.
498
00:20:05,030 --> 00:20:07,612
I don't care who wins
your stupid competition.
499
00:20:07,712 --> 00:20:11,256
I'm gonna kill every last
human by myself if I have to.
500
00:20:11,356 --> 00:20:13,098
Because I know humans.
501
00:20:13,198 --> 00:20:14,980
I've seen their true nature.
502
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:17,782
They're selfish, they're fake,
503
00:20:17,882 --> 00:20:20,065
and they will pay for
what they've done.
504
00:20:27,612 --> 00:20:29,955
Now, that's the
hotness, right there.
505
00:20:30,055 --> 00:20:32,437
Congratulations, TI-90.
506
00:20:32,537 --> 00:20:35,840
You are NeuralNet's
Next Top Model!
507
00:20:35,890 --> 00:20:40,440
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