Original subtitles

Subs created by: David Coleman.

- I almost caught this spoon. - (Cell phone rings)

- Phone. - Hello.

Yo, E-dog!

You've got 20 minutes before MC Monsterbat drops the

beats from the streets and schools these fools!

Who is it?

MC Monsterbat.

That's me.

Rory!

I'm tuning up for the school talent show!

Rory says he's gonna "drop some beats" at the open mic tonight.

- Do we want to go? - (Laughs)

There's a really hot girl going on first.

He says there's a really hot girl going on first.

Does she have one of those wicked, awesome flying V guitars?

No.

I'm out. Sounds emo.

Sorry, Rory.

This song is about how I hurt sometimes.

Maybe you'll hurt too.

La, la, la.

Ta, ta, ta.

Inside is the dark.

The dark is inside.

I run out of room, no places to hide.

And all I can do..

Is drag you into..

The da-da-dark!

The da-da-dark! The da-da-dark!

- The da-da-dark! - (Cell phone rings)

The da-da-dark! The da-da-dark!

The dark.

Hey, mom. No, don't worry about dinner.

I'll grab a rat.. Ratsa.. Pasta!

And all I can do..

Is drag you into..

(Chuckles)

Love you too.

Everybody get home safely.

Great. How am I supposed to follow that?

She's the girl next door.

Just for me.

What you get is what you see.

No more "maybe it's Maybelline".

She can give you everything you need.

She's the girl next door.

Nice, but naughty, a heart that's pure.

She's the girl next door.

Just for me.

She destroyed the audience!

I tried to destroy the paramedics when they showed up,

but they asked me to be quiet while they worked.

So the entire football team is in the hospital?

No wonder there's so much room in the hallway.

Yeah! Luxurious!

And wedgie-free!

If she can work a crowd like that, she's gonna own the talent show this week.

(Scoffs)

You're assuming the judges will have any unblown minds after they see my..

Fruit juggling.

(Humming)

Pretty good, huh?

There she is.

Her name is Serena.

La!

Take that, old man Carter! (Grunts)

Whoa!

Marty's usually not the wedge-er.

Man: (On pa) Attention, students.

The talent show tryouts are starting in the school auditorium.

I know I can't wait.

And yet somehow I will.

- All right. - That is all.

Time to get my juggle on.

Better hope you juggle better than I spin, bro!

MC Monsterbat takes no..

P-p-p-p-p-prisoners!

(Mimics scratching)

Buddy.

La!

(Grunting)

Did she just tell those two guys to fight each other?

Aw! Why won't people fight over me when I tell them to?

I gotta figure out that Vampire mind control.

- You mean "glamouring?" Because I doubt.. - Ethan.

(Echoing) Do my homework.

- Erica. - Yeah.

- No. - Six, seven, eight.

Spin. Pop. No-slide!

Bust?

What's happening here?

Sarah made me work on a dance routine for the talent show.

She's practicing for the tryout.

(Whispers) But I'm ditching her.

So, are you gonna come see me and Erica dance up a storm?

No. I'm not really much for storms of the dancing variety.

Oh, and one.

I don't know most of your names, so I don't have a list.

Who's first?

I'll go first, Mr. Stern! Yeah.

Hey! My apples!

Don't worry. I saved you one.

I can't juggle just one apple!

I gotta hit the cafeteria. Excuse me.

Make way.

I have a thousand screams in my soul.

I yearn to share them all with you.

Go for it.

This is gonna rock.

I'd better record this.

Test. Test.

(Vocalizing)

Feel my pain.

Feel my pain.

Feel my pain.

Feel my pain.

(Electricity crackling)

(Music playing on earphones)

What just happened?

The depths of my pain require more bass.

That's the first time a song has given me an ice cream headache.

You're in.

Sorry the power went out.

I just got the urge to bite something.

Whatever it was tasted really sparky.

So. What's your secret?

I only rinse out half the conditioner.

No. Not your hair.

Wait, does that work?

Never mind.

How did you get two guys to fight over you?

I sang to them.

They felt my pain.

I need everyone to feel my pain.

How do I do that?

With a talent you'll never have.

Soon the whole world will feel my pain.

No, Rory. You don't have electricity stuck in your teeth.

Phew!

So I come back from my apple run and all the auditions are over.

And the line for the nurse's office is out the door.

What happened?

Oh. Serena sang a beautiful song!

Test. Test.

(Shrill noise)

That's not what I heard.

There must be something wrong with my phone.

Or something wrong with Serena.

First, the football team riots in the lounge,

and then a talent show tryout turns into the boss level Megafightaloid IV.

Quit making video game references I don't understand.

I felt like I was in a trance, but I forgot the song as soon as it was over.

Maybe she's Justin Bieber.

Maybe she's a mermaid!

The Bieber joke was funnier.

No, I'm serious.

Mermaids can mess with people's minds, and hide their tails on land.

We just need to splash some water on her and see if she grows fins. It's easy.

Whatever the songbird is, just call me when you want me to kick her butt, okay?

She doesn't have a butt.

Mermaids don't have butts.

(Door slams)

(Sighs)

There you are.

Did you punch that?

I know you're really mad at me for ditching you at the tryouts

because I thought our dance routine was lame and I didn't want to do it.

You did what?

But now, I am totally into it.

Serena's going to see who has talent!

Wait. You ditched me?

Oh, stop living in the past, Sarah.

What matters now is that we've got moves to bust!

Oh, yeah, buddy.

Oh, yeah!

(Sighs)

(Both screaming)

Okay, fine. Not a mermaid. My bad.

(Shrill screaming)

- I can't waste time with dweebs. - (Ethan groaning)

I've got songs of pain to bring to everyone.

- Help me out here. - Okay.

Definitely not a mermaid.

Your eyes are fine, your ears are good. You're gonna be fine.

Okay, look, look, look.

- Huh? - It's quiet and dark in here.

Like a sensory deprivation chamber.

- What? - Stay in until your ears stop ringing!

Put this on. In you go.

Good boy. That's it. That's a good boy.

- It's dark in here. - No, no, don't worry.

I'll be right here if you need me.

- Smells like shoes. - Playing your video games!

I got that new myth monster game!

You bought Myth Monster Mayhem?

- These monsters are so lame! - Can't wait to play it.

You know, in a Pixie vs. Leprechaun cage match, everyone loses.

I mean, look at this.. "The mythical Siren's song".

"Blasts the brains of her opponents, making them go berserk".

Yeah, like that would ever happen.

(Game noises)

Dude! What if Serena is a Siren?

We should analyze one of her songs

and see if it has any supernatural mojo coming off of it!

Benny, I just had an idea!

Maybe Serena is a Siren!

Like from ancient Greece?

We should analyze her song!

No! That was my idea!

Benny thought of it first!

And I'm going to build the equipment!

I have to get started on that equipment!

Come on!

Rory. This is what my name looks like.

Rory.

Will you grow up?

This is serious.

- Okay. - Is that a tinfoil hat?

Aluminum foil.

To keep Serena's crazy waves out of my brain.

Duh.

Ethan said earplugs are fine but I'm not taking any chances.

Where is Ethan?

I ordered him to sit this one out.

He needs to recover after his showdown with Serena.

Benny, is my hat tight enough?

Yeah.

Thanks, pal.

Hey, guys.

What are you doing here?

You can't risk more exposure to Serena's song.

When we were eight and we went to see Buzzy and the Big Bee Band, and I cried..

(Chuckles) He cried?

Did you let me face the music alone?

Thank you. Brother.

Earplugs, engage.

- It was you that I knew. - Good job, guys. Good job.

But it hurts when I care.

My red heart is blue, and that just ain't fair.

The heart that's in you.

The ultrasonics are off the scale.

What?

There's definitely something going on here.

Your heart is mostly meat!

Yes, your heart is mostly meat..

- Ethan! - Oh.

It's just biscotti.

- Man, I hate this emo junk! - What?

- Benny: What? - Rory: What?

What's wrong with you?

Thanks for listening.

If Ethan's mom finds out about this, I am so fired!

(Ethan groans)

Serena's voice is full of paranormal acoustic energy.

She's affecting people's brains.

Rory?

Okay, so this is Rory's normal brainwave pattern.

Pretty dead.

I'm laid back, dude. Why stress?

Play a bit of classical music.

(Classical music playing) Rory is nice and calm.

But, as soon as I play even a second of Serena's song..

(Serena vocalizing)

And Rory tries to bite his arm off.

So Serena is a Siren. How do we stop her?

Well, according to Greek Mythology, and Whata-pedia,

the sirens lost a singing contest to the Muses

and were destroyed by their own jealousy.

Too bad we don't know the Muses' Agent.

What if we become the Muses?

We get into that talent show, and when she turns on us,

we use her own song against her.

How?

I mean, what if she likes her own (Screams) "Yeah" voice?

Yeah.

But we could rig up a phase inverter

and send a negative image of her own evil harmonics right back at her!

Yeah! The old evil-harmonic- phase-inverter trick!

Could work.

Yeah! We should totally invert her face.

But how do we get on the show and be good enough to make her jealous?

And we'd have to get really close for the phase inverter to even work.

Simple. Music today is all done on computers.

We just gotta figure out the formula for the perfect song.

Okay.

Well, just in case you three don't become the hottest boy band of all time,

I'll go tell Erica we may need some more kicks in our dance routine.

Good idea.

Guys, we should totally drop one of MC Monsterbat's tracks.

My beats make people feel good.

We'd be called MC Monsterbat..

And the Muses.

- No. - Both: Muse-atronics!

Muse-atronics! Yeah!

I agree.

Okay. Our music is mathematically perfect,

our lyrics use only the most popular words from hit songs of the last 10 years.

And..

We are robo-tuuuuuunnned!

MC Monsterbat in the house!

One, three, five, seven!

You! Me! Never and always!

Baby! Maybe together!

- Love, kiss hurt, pain. - Thank you.

Stay-go, sun, rain..

Stop!

That was terrible.

No, truly.

Now, I can either ask you to leave,

or I can give you the last slot in the show and..

Then I can leave.

So, congratulations.

(Laughs)

All: Muse-atronics!

Hey, Mr. Stern, are you ready for a dance explosion?

No! I'm ready to have a hot cup of tea and my ears flushed.

Goodbye.

(Hisses)

Erica!

No!

So, we're just gonna hang around backstage like losers?

We're here to help.

When Serena hits the stage, things are going to get crazy.

If she opens her mouth again, things will get crazy.

You're really mad.

Yeah, well?

Rory is just so talented.

He can't stick with a single hobby for more than a week

because it doesn't challenge him any more.

Recently, he's very into volunteering at petting zoos.

That's great stuff, Vivian.

He really likes the smaller animals.

I bet you he's going to be a vet when he grows up.

(Crowd applauding)

Good evening.

Good evening and welcome to the 15th annual Whitechapel High talent show.

If you could keep your applause to a minimum, we'll get out of here in no time.

Okay.

Our students will now display a variety of skills,

none of which will land them jobs in the future.

Thanks for helping with my hair.

I can't really use a mirror.

Any time, champ.

Hey, Rory, your mom's here.

Right next to your Grandmother.

Oh, that's not good.

Yeah, I'm worried about my Grandma, too.

No, you don't understand. I'm worried about everyone else.

My mom can really throw 'em.

Will your Grandma back us up when the magic starts flying?

No chance. As soon as that music starts playing, that hearing aid is going off.

She hates anything without an accordion in it.

(Crowd applauding)

Thank you, Marty. Now, if you could disappear, that would be great.

- Before we get to our show stopper.. - Hi, mom!

Here is an act that can only be described as..

.. Next.

(Noise dies out)

Muse-atronic.

All: Muse-atronics!

Hit it, Benny!

You! Me! Never and always!

Baby! Maybe together!

Hey, I heard about your little dance implosion.

Whoops.

(Hissing)

Ignore her.

She'll be toast in a few minutes.

There's a thing after dinner that ya waitin' for..

The flava gets your feet tappin' on that floor..

You never wanna finish all your brussel sprouts..

But the treat that's coming, makes you scream and shout!

Uh! Uh! Gotta get that cake!

Yeah! Yeah! Gotta eat that cake!

Yeah! Pop and lock, honey!

Come on now, who wants some cake?

I want some cake!

These people are mine!

Okay, well, she's mad.

I guess we got that right.

(Vocalizing)

Earplugs!

Stop it! These people need to feel my pain!

And so do you!

(Vocalizing)

Ow!

(Growls)

Erica, stop!

The dark is inside..

I drag you into..

- Benny! - The dark.

(Screaming)

I got her! You deal with Serena!

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

Ethan! Hurry up!

The da-da-dark..

- The da-da-dark.. - Ow!

Ethan, do it now!

- I got it. - That's it!

Here's a real magic show!

Yeah, Marty!

The da-da-dark..

The da-da-dark..

(Pained scream)

(Screaming)

You can't keep me quiet!

Sorry? What was that?

(Drowned scream)

(All gasping)

That was intense.

Well, guys, I think we just recorded our first number one!

- Yes! - Woo!

(All applauding)

Very interesting act, boys. Very interesting.

Take a bow.

Muse-atronics!

Ethan: I think that's the last we'll hear from Serena.

And MC Monsterbat.

Rory: (On pa) Yeah, buddy! Whitechapel High, this ain't no lie!

Monsterbat morning meltdown, don't even ask why!

Chi-chi.

Intramural volleyball begins at 4:00 today.

You can pick up your team vests at lunch,

but don't use them as bibs! I'm just kidding!

- See you later. - You can use them for bibs.

Let's go for a bite.

Sync & corrections by P2Pfiend. Www.Addic7ed.Com.