All language subtitles for High Maintenance s02e01

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,363 --> 00:00:02,280 So good to meet you. Mwah. Mwah! 2 00:00:02,280 --> 00:00:04,780 You're adorable, you fucking peanut. (indistinct chattering) 3 00:00:04,780 --> 00:00:06,988 I love it. You guys. 4 00:00:06,988 --> 00:00:09,280 Oh, God bless. So good. Guys, take it easy! 5 00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:10,780 So love you. Obsessed with you. 6 00:00:10,780 --> 00:00:12,155 Ew. What the fuck, man? 7 00:00:12,155 --> 00:00:14,030 Faggot convention over here. How did Peter end up 8 00:00:14,030 --> 00:00:15,363 with that total fucking troll? 9 00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:17,280 What in the gay hell? He kept cornering me all night. 10 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:18,613 Oh! And his breath-- 11 00:00:18,613 --> 00:00:20,405 it, like, smelled like old pennies. 12 00:00:20,405 --> 00:00:22,155 Yes! That's exactly what it was. 13 00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:24,655 Hey, man, can I get a cigarette and a light for a dollar, please? 14 00:00:24,655 --> 00:00:26,488 Here, hand me those so you can-- 15 00:00:26,488 --> 00:00:29,030 What was that about? It was like, skin tags, take them off your face. 16 00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:30,780 They're called tags for a reason. Thank you. 17 00:00:30,780 --> 00:00:32,030 You know what I mean? Thank you! 18 00:00:32,030 --> 00:00:33,905 Just, like, all over his face. 19 00:00:33,905 --> 00:00:35,655 Just on and on-- you know? 20 00:00:35,655 --> 00:00:37,530 Oh, I don't have a dollar. 21 00:00:37,530 --> 00:00:39,905 Anyway, did you notice too how his Adam's apple 22 00:00:39,905 --> 00:00:42,655 literally looked like he had swallowed an arrowhead or-- 23 00:00:42,655 --> 00:00:44,780 So sharp, so gross. So sharp! 24 00:00:44,780 --> 00:00:46,821 Fucking Olivia-- unbelievable. 25 00:00:46,821 --> 00:00:48,613 You can't just not wear a bra. You did not wear a bra. 26 00:00:48,613 --> 00:00:50,738 She's looking good since she did Blue Print, you must admit. 27 00:00:50,738 --> 00:00:51,863 Oh my God, do not even say that. 28 00:00:51,863 --> 00:00:54,488 This tastes like spunk. 29 00:00:54,463 --> 00:00:56,546 But it's like, how am I supposed to express my creativity 30 00:00:56,571 --> 00:00:58,363 and, like, really stretch my wings 31 00:00:58,363 --> 00:01:00,571 if they don't give me a budget? Like, I'm a bird in a cage, 32 00:01:00,571 --> 00:01:01,863 literally, right now. 33 00:01:01,863 --> 00:01:03,946 And I have to shit and I'm in Meatpacking-- 34 00:01:03,946 --> 00:01:06,988 Can you-- can you stop by the Duane Reade and get me some tampons? 35 00:01:06,988 --> 00:01:09,363 It's like Nicole Simpson up in here. 36 00:01:09,363 --> 00:01:11,071 This is your selection, isn't it? 37 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,988 I can tell this is yours 38 00:01:12,988 --> 00:01:14,821 because it's really well curated. 39 00:01:14,821 --> 00:01:17,113 Woke up this morning, made me an exquisite breakfast-- 40 00:01:17,113 --> 00:01:19,321 So hot. But I had plans with Benjamin 41 00:01:19,321 --> 00:01:22,488 and I made him pick me up at Jonathan's house. 42 00:01:22,488 --> 00:01:24,696 You're such a slut. I'm obsessed with you. 43 00:01:24,696 --> 00:01:28,488 Uh, why do you keep making me do this? I'm a bad friend. 44 00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:30,196 Oh, my god, hide me, hide me. 45 00:01:30,196 --> 00:01:31,988 Please just, like, help me. You're being so dramatic. 46 00:01:31,988 --> 00:01:33,863 No, you don't understand. You're such a queen sometimes. 47 00:01:33,863 --> 00:01:35,571 No, he fisted me at Kanye's secret show 48 00:01:35,571 --> 00:01:36,946 in the Boom Boom Room at The Standard. 49 00:01:36,946 --> 00:01:38,988 You've got to stop letting people put their fist up there. 50 00:01:38,988 --> 00:01:40,613 Just put your face in front of mine. 51 00:01:40,613 --> 00:01:42,321 Ah, this is ridiculous. 52 00:01:42,321 --> 00:01:45,196 (laughs) Hi. 53 00:01:45,196 --> 00:01:47,946 I gotta say, originally I was kind of upset 54 00:01:47,946 --> 00:01:49,863 that you guys had a kid, 'cause he was kind of 55 00:01:49,863 --> 00:01:52,738 screwing up my income stream, but he's really cute! 56 00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:55,488 I would have had you here every week for the last two years 57 00:01:55,488 --> 00:01:56,946 if she wasn't breastfeeding. 58 00:01:56,946 --> 00:01:58,488 I still really want it, though. 59 00:01:58,488 --> 00:01:59,946 Are you guys doing anything fun tonight? 60 00:01:59,946 --> 00:02:01,696 Well, not tonight. But tomorrow night, 61 00:02:01,696 --> 00:02:04,238 my mom is taking him and we're gonna go up to Beacon 62 00:02:04,238 --> 00:02:06,363 and stay with friends and... (whispers) get fucked up 63 00:02:06,363 --> 00:02:08,488 (speaks normally) and just sleep. (phone chirping) 64 00:02:08,488 --> 00:02:09,738 Ah, sorry, one second. 65 00:02:11,988 --> 00:02:13,613 I want this one! 66 00:02:14,821 --> 00:02:16,946 Hi. You still at the same address? 67 00:02:16,946 --> 00:02:18,988 Max: Yeah, and I don't really have a lot of time. 68 00:02:18,988 --> 00:02:21,196 No, okay, that's fine. I'll be in like an hour. 69 00:02:21,196 --> 00:02:24,071 Okay, can you get here sooner than that, though? 70 00:02:24,071 --> 00:02:25,988 I pressed X! 71 00:02:25,988 --> 00:02:27,863 "I pressed X!" We'll see. 72 00:02:27,863 --> 00:02:29,613 Bye. Bye. 73 00:02:29,613 --> 00:02:31,488 Oh, and also the one device in the entire world 74 00:02:31,488 --> 00:02:33,238 that doesn't have Black Book on it. 75 00:02:33,238 --> 00:02:35,446 So, thanks, Dad. Merry Christmas, faggot. 76 00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:37,863 Lainey: Oh my God, kill yourself, Olivia. 77 00:02:37,863 --> 00:02:39,738 Just fucking kill yourself. 78 00:02:39,738 --> 00:02:41,738 Have you seen her Facebook profile? 79 00:02:41,738 --> 00:02:43,613 She's listing herself as an artist. 80 00:02:43,613 --> 00:02:47,363 Listen, you dumb bitch, just cutting up a Klimt coffee table book 81 00:02:47,363 --> 00:02:50,113 and making collages does not make you an artist. 82 00:02:50,113 --> 00:02:51,988 Her Tumblr is actually beautiful, though. Oh my God! 83 00:02:51,988 --> 00:02:54,863 Do not even say that. You're just enabling her mediocrity. 84 00:02:54,863 --> 00:02:58,155 Hey, hey, dumb bitch, your boyfriend tried to sleep with me 85 00:02:58,155 --> 00:03:01,530 after the Ginger and Rosa screening. Idiot. 86 00:03:01,530 --> 00:03:03,155 Hey, man, are you going to give us a discount 87 00:03:03,155 --> 00:03:04,780 since you were actually two hours late for us? 88 00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:08,363 No. It's Friday night. I'm very busy. 89 00:03:08,363 --> 00:03:11,030 Okay, calm down. Okay, so it's $50? 90 00:03:11,030 --> 00:03:12,780 All right, so, babe, money. 91 00:03:12,780 --> 00:03:14,655 No, I didn't take out any cash today. 92 00:03:14,655 --> 00:03:16,780 I have $63 in my account. I'm waiting on a paycheck. 93 00:03:16,780 --> 00:03:18,780 Are you serious right now? I don't even smoke. 94 00:03:18,780 --> 00:03:19,863 I'm not paying for this. 95 00:03:19,863 --> 00:03:21,613 We got this weed because we told Erika-- 96 00:03:21,613 --> 00:03:23,905 you told Erika that we would trade her for coke. 97 00:03:23,905 --> 00:03:26,655 Okay, you're gonna smoke half the bag before we even give it to her. 98 00:03:26,655 --> 00:03:28,780 So I'll shit out $50 right now? Where am I going to get $50? 99 00:03:28,780 --> 00:03:30,780 Just-- Max, just go down to the bodega. 100 00:03:30,780 --> 00:03:32,488 It's literally a 45-second walk-- 101 00:03:32,488 --> 00:03:35,738 No-- no bodega. Because bodega takes $2, Chase takes $3. 102 00:03:35,738 --> 00:03:37,780 Go into overdraft immediately. You are so ghetto. 103 00:03:37,780 --> 00:03:40,030 You guys need to have this shit figured out before I get here. 104 00:03:40,030 --> 00:03:42,738 No, no, it's fine. We'll just-- we'll all go to the Chase 105 00:03:42,738 --> 00:03:44,738 No. No, no, no, no. or the Duane Reade together. 106 00:03:44,738 --> 00:03:46,030 That's not how it works, dude. 107 00:03:46,030 --> 00:03:48,280 Listen, why don't I just stay here with her 108 00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:50,280 and you can go down to the Duane Reade? 109 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:52,363 Are you fucking serious right now? 110 00:03:52,363 --> 00:03:55,780 I am not staying here alone with a shady drug dealer. 111 00:03:59,155 --> 00:04:01,113 Man: Where are you? Hey, man. 112 00:04:01,113 --> 00:04:03,655 Need to leave soon. Yeah, it's taking a little while. 113 00:04:03,655 --> 00:04:05,780 I'll be there. 114 00:04:09,780 --> 00:04:11,905 About fucking time. 115 00:04:11,905 --> 00:04:13,655 Oh, I can't-- 116 00:04:13,655 --> 00:04:15,863 Um, no! 117 00:04:15,863 --> 00:04:19,238 Bumped right into us! Are you fucking kidding me? 118 00:04:19,238 --> 00:04:21,488 Max: Oh, my god! 119 00:04:21,488 --> 00:04:24,030 Hey! Hey! 120 00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:25,905 Okay. Are we doing this? 121 00:04:25,905 --> 00:04:27,905 Okay! Sorry, that's our drug deal-- 122 00:04:27,905 --> 00:04:29,655 Like an angel! Max: You are so cute! 123 00:04:29,655 --> 00:04:31,405 (indistinct) Bye! 124 00:04:31,405 --> 00:04:35,405 (indistinct) He was at Bonnaroo and he had a drug trip and it, like, changed him. 125 00:04:37,155 --> 00:04:38,655 Is that rose gold? 126 00:04:40,655 --> 00:04:43,113 Yeah. Ugh! I love rose gold. 127 00:04:43,113 --> 00:04:46,155 When I get married, I'm gonna get a rose-gold band 128 00:04:46,155 --> 00:04:48,530 with, like, black diamonds. 129 00:04:48,530 --> 00:04:49,905 Good. 130 00:04:49,905 --> 00:04:52,405 Thank you so much. A-plus customer service from you. 131 00:04:52,405 --> 00:04:54,780 I wish I could tip you. Uh, I have got to rally! 132 00:04:54,780 --> 00:04:56,863 I am so not feeling this tonight. 133 00:04:56,863 --> 00:04:58,905 I know, I feel like poop. 134 00:04:58,905 --> 00:05:00,738 (singing softly) 135 00:05:00,738 --> 00:05:02,780 Not cool, man. What? 136 00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:04,905 You're gonna give me 50 more dollars? 137 00:05:04,905 --> 00:05:08,155 Why would I do that? You know why. 138 00:05:08,155 --> 00:05:10,655 Oh my God, you guys. Drama! 139 00:05:10,655 --> 00:05:12,863 What's going on? Your friend knows what's going on. 140 00:05:12,863 --> 00:05:14,780 I really-- I don't know what you're talking about. 141 00:05:14,780 --> 00:05:16,905 I came here with nine bags and now I only have seven. 142 00:05:16,905 --> 00:05:18,905 So you either give me back the one you took 143 00:05:18,905 --> 00:05:20,655 or you give me another $50. 144 00:05:20,655 --> 00:05:22,030 Well, I took one from you, 145 00:05:22,030 --> 00:05:24,363 which I literally just paid you for. 146 00:05:24,363 --> 00:05:25,863 So I think our transaction is over 147 00:05:25,863 --> 00:05:27,613 and you should be walking out of my door right now. 148 00:05:27,613 --> 00:05:30,113 Just give it back. I'm not gonna do anything. 149 00:05:30,113 --> 00:05:31,780 Just give it back or-- 150 00:05:31,780 --> 00:05:35,905 Or what? You're going to call the police? 151 00:05:35,905 --> 00:05:38,405 File a report? 152 00:05:39,863 --> 00:05:42,488 You know what? Fuck it. You can have it. 153 00:05:42,488 --> 00:05:44,988 And I hope you enjoy it because you're blacklisted now. 154 00:05:44,988 --> 00:05:46,363 Have a good night, assholes. 155 00:05:46,363 --> 00:05:47,738 Yeah, you smell like dick cheese. 156 00:05:47,738 --> 00:05:49,280 You were molested as a kid. 157 00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:51,905 I like this, so I'm gonna take it. 158 00:05:51,905 --> 00:05:54,530 Thanks for the tip, chuckleheads. 159 00:05:54,530 --> 00:05:55,780 (door closes) 160 00:05:55,780 --> 00:05:57,613 It's okay, I took three bags. 161 00:05:57,613 --> 00:06:00,905 That stupid stoner doesn't even know how to count. 162 00:06:00,905 --> 00:06:04,655 How do you think he knew you were molested? 163 00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:19,155 ? You gotta, you gotta, you gotta? 164 00:06:19,155 --> 00:06:21,280 ? You gotta, you gotta, you gotta ? 165 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:23,488 ? To look the part ? 166 00:06:23,488 --> 00:06:25,280 ? How to appear ? 167 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:26,738 ? How to disappear ? 168 00:06:26,738 --> 00:06:28,238 ? How to appear ? 169 00:06:28,238 --> 00:06:29,988 ? How to disappear ? 170 00:06:29,988 --> 00:06:31,988 ? You've got to look the part ? 171 00:06:31,988 --> 00:06:34,405 ? You've got to look the part ? 172 00:06:36,655 --> 00:06:38,238 ? How to disappear ? 173 00:06:38,238 --> 00:06:40,113 ? How to reappear... ? 174 00:06:40,113 --> 00:06:41,613 ? How to disappear ? 175 00:06:41,663 --> 00:06:46,213 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 13607

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