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1
00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:07,389
I now sentence you
to twelve years.
2
00:00:07,409 --> 00:00:08,877
Objection!
3
00:00:08,901 --> 00:00:10,491
Helen!
4
00:00:10,492 --> 00:00:12,881
Ms Grainger!
5
00:00:12,882 --> 00:00:16,071
You got to help me find Justin!
6
00:00:16,072 --> 00:00:18,601
Did you find out anything about that
address I gave you?
7
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:19,945
Mashta Fembwick?
8
00:00:19,957 --> 00:00:21,014
- Yes!
- No.
9
00:00:21,032 --> 00:00:22,531
Shit...
10
00:00:22,532 --> 00:00:26,051
If a tree wins the lottery in a
forest and nobody hears it,
11
00:00:26,052 --> 00:00:28,301
did it really win the lottery?
12
00:00:28,302 --> 00:00:32,331
What do you know
about the missing money?
13
00:00:32,332 --> 00:00:35,891
- What's that?
- It's a tiny little sex tape, Helen.
14
00:00:35,892 --> 00:00:37,301
Shhh...
15
00:00:37,302 --> 00:00:39,691
Where is it, you bastard?
16
00:00:39,692 --> 00:00:41,205
Can...?
17
00:00:50,804 --> 00:00:54,350
Sync, corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com
18
00:00:56,892 --> 00:01:00,781
Dear Maurice,
thank you for your postcard,
19
00:01:00,782 --> 00:01:04,771
and massive congrats on winning
the first stage of your appeal.
20
00:01:04,772 --> 00:01:07,631
If you can get out of prison after
doing what you did to that family,
21
00:01:07,632 --> 00:01:10,251
then maybe, just maybe, so can I.
22
00:01:13,097 --> 00:01:15,601
Stephens. You're free to go.
23
00:01:15,602 --> 00:01:17,561
I'm free?
24
00:01:17,562 --> 00:01:20,331
I'm a free woman?
They quashed my case?
25
00:01:20,332 --> 00:01:23,381
Oh, God bless the British penal
system and God bless...
26
00:01:23,382 --> 00:01:25,441
No, no.
You're just free from solitary.
27
00:01:25,442 --> 00:01:30,641
You've still got another decade plus
21 months to go in here.
28
00:01:30,642 --> 00:01:32,485
Hmph!
29
00:01:35,052 --> 00:01:37,671
Did you see Frozen Planet
last night?
30
00:01:37,672 --> 00:01:40,201
No. I've been in solitary
confinement.
31
00:01:40,202 --> 00:01:44,331
Aye. A seal pup befriended
a "penguine".
32
00:01:44,332 --> 00:01:45,470
You mean a penguin?
33
00:01:45,471 --> 00:01:49,911
Whatever.
That seal pup has got a friend for life.
34
00:01:49,912 --> 00:01:53,611
Anyway.
Got some news. Er...
35
00:01:53,612 --> 00:01:56,331
Yeah. Laura's got her job back at
Entirely Tiles
36
00:01:56,332 --> 00:01:58,621
so we have someone on the inside.
37
00:01:58,622 --> 00:02:02,354
OK, that's good. Erm... Listen,
I've got something to tell you. Erm...
38
00:02:05,192 --> 00:02:07,811
Mrs Bridges came to see me last week,
39
00:02:07,812 --> 00:02:11,231
and it turns out that she seems
to think
40
00:02:11,232 --> 00:02:15,311
that I'd been having some sort
of affair with her husband.
41
00:02:15,312 --> 00:02:17,576
Were you having an affair
with her husband?
42
00:02:21,692 --> 00:02:24,121
And you didn't think
to mention this before?
43
00:02:24,122 --> 00:02:26,141
Don't get on your high horse
with me, Tony.
44
00:02:26,142 --> 00:02:27,712
I'm not getting on my high horse,
45
00:02:27,713 --> 00:02:30,411
I'm simply wondering why you've
taken until now
46
00:02:30,412 --> 00:02:34,201
to tell me you were noshing off
the man you're accused of murdering!
47
00:02:34,202 --> 00:02:37,581
- I still didn't kill him!
- You should've told me.
48
00:02:37,582 --> 00:02:39,921
If you don't trust me,
we don't have a case.
49
00:02:39,922 --> 00:02:41,231
Why should I?
50
00:02:41,232 --> 00:02:45,031
I'm still in prison for a crime I didn't commit.
You haven't found Justin,
51
00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:47,490
you haven't even traced that Mashta
Fembwick address.
52
00:02:47,491 --> 00:02:50,891
- It doesn't make any sense!
- You can't even pronounce the word penguin!
53
00:02:50,892 --> 00:02:52,781
What're you doing to get me out
of here, Tony?
54
00:02:52,862 --> 00:02:54,139
What have you been doing?
55
00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:56,041
What have I been doing?
56
00:02:56,042 --> 00:02:58,811
Getting to the bottom
of your case.
57
00:02:58,812 --> 00:03:03,606
This means more to me than 20
accidents in the workplace,
58
00:03:03,692 --> 00:03:04,921
30 accidents even,
59
00:03:04,922 --> 00:03:08,861
including a very profitable
fork-lift-truck impalement.
60
00:03:11,092 --> 00:03:12,241
I'll see myself out.
61
00:03:16,762 --> 00:03:20,181
You've done wonders with this
institution, Margaret.
62
00:03:20,182 --> 00:03:23,891
And you know how well you're regarded amongst
those of us in the Ministry of justice.
63
00:03:23,892 --> 00:03:24,921
Thank you.
64
00:03:24,922 --> 00:03:27,261
- One is only trying to do one's job.
- Yes.
65
00:03:27,262 --> 00:03:29,841
Which is precisely why we'd
like you to move to Sheppey.
66
00:03:31,482 --> 00:03:35,001
We think you could be the woman to
lead Sheppey into the 21st century.
67
00:03:35,002 --> 00:03:36,641
Well, at least the 20th.
68
00:03:36,642 --> 00:03:39,641
But it's not without its charms,
and I'm sure you'll enjoy
69
00:03:39,642 --> 00:03:42,054
the camaraderie of not being stuck
in your own office.
70
00:03:43,572 --> 00:03:45,071
Camaraderie?
71
00:03:45,072 --> 00:03:47,063
All the staff just... muck in.
72
00:03:48,172 --> 00:03:49,721
Yes, it is rather isolated,
73
00:03:49,722 --> 00:03:51,884
but the views of the oil rigs are
second to none!
74
00:03:51,885 --> 00:03:54,887
When the rain stops.
75
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:59,181
I can see how much this deployment
has captured your imagination.
76
00:03:59,182 --> 00:04:02,421
We're still interviewing candidates
for your replacement.
77
00:04:02,422 --> 00:04:04,220
Governor Gorey is our favourite.
78
00:04:04,221 --> 00:04:07,811
I know he has very different methods to you.
Big fan of an appeal.
79
00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:09,564
Yes. I'll see myself out.
80
00:04:11,182 --> 00:04:13,101
Yes...
81
00:04:13,102 --> 00:04:14,479
Congratulations, ma'am.
82
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,011
Not only am I behind you,
83
00:04:16,012 --> 00:04:19,391
but I'm beside you and with you
every step of the way.
84
00:04:19,392 --> 00:04:21,591
Viva la Sheppey.
85
00:04:21,592 --> 00:04:23,617
Camaraderie.
86
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,085
What is happening?
87
00:04:30,086 --> 00:04:33,451
Please! Somebody help!
88
00:04:33,452 --> 00:04:35,341
That didn't work out as well
as I'd planned.
89
00:04:35,342 --> 00:04:38,181
Christine!
What the hell do you think you're...?
90
00:04:38,182 --> 00:04:43,061
I wanted to cover your eyes because...
Surprise!
91
00:04:43,062 --> 00:04:46,431
It's made from my total loo roll
allowance over the last eight days!
92
00:04:46,432 --> 00:04:47,911
Well then what did...?
93
00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:50,371
Doesn't matter. Is that hair?
94
00:04:50,372 --> 00:04:52,201
It certainly is!
95
00:04:52,202 --> 00:04:54,031
Oh!
96
00:04:54,032 --> 00:04:59,004
Aw. Girl on girl.
My favourite of all the actions.
97
00:05:00,312 --> 00:05:02,461
This one's missed you.
Haven't you?
98
00:05:02,462 --> 00:05:06,071
I've got so many plans and dreams
and plans and dreams and...
99
00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:08,421
Yeah, well, you'll have
to shelve them,
100
00:05:08,422 --> 00:05:11,437
because Stephens is being moved
to D Wing.
101
00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:13,828
My hair words!
102
00:05:13,829 --> 00:05:16,521
What? I don't like the sound
of D Wing.
103
00:05:16,522 --> 00:05:19,621
- I like it here, in P wing.
- Guv's orders.
104
00:05:19,622 --> 00:05:20,760
Helen!
105
00:05:22,012 --> 00:05:24,631
Don't make any new friends!
106
00:05:24,632 --> 00:05:25,645
Helen!
107
00:05:30,418 --> 00:05:33,377
How did it go?
Did Stephens squeal?
108
00:05:33,402 --> 00:05:35,981
No, she didn't squeal, Mary,
cos according to her,
109
00:05:35,982 --> 00:05:38,981
she don't know where the money is,
or about no syndicate scam.
110
00:05:38,982 --> 00:05:41,791
In fact, apparently she didn't
even kill my Eric.
111
00:05:41,792 --> 00:05:43,381
Told you Helen was innocent.
112
00:05:43,382 --> 00:05:46,761
No.
She ain't innocent, Henry.
113
00:05:46,762 --> 00:05:52,030
Did you know, "pour exampler",
Helen was banging my dear husband?
114
00:05:53,792 --> 00:05:55,635
I think you must have the wrong
Helen.
115
00:05:55,636 --> 00:06:00,821
I think I can,
I know l can, I know l can.
116
00:06:00,822 --> 00:06:02,651
- I know I can! I...
- Urgh!
117
00:06:02,652 --> 00:06:03,961
PHONE RINGS ON TAPE
118
00:06:03,962 --> 00:06:06,261
Think you'd better get that, Helen.
119
00:06:06,262 --> 00:06:08,754
Yeah, could be
the Purbeck Marble people.
120
00:06:08,755 --> 00:06:09,961
TAPE THUDS
121
00:06:09,962 --> 00:06:12,631
Where did you get that tape?
122
00:06:12,632 --> 00:06:16,481
Got something you want to get off
your flat chest, Mary?
123
00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:19,258
I don't know
what you're talking about.
124
00:06:22,342 --> 00:06:26,461
Why'd you do it, Mary?
Was you hoping for a promotion?
125
00:06:26,462 --> 00:06:27,961
Or a little Christmas boner?
126
00:06:27,962 --> 00:06:30,982
I...
I...
127
00:06:33,352 --> 00:06:35,237
- You don't understand.
- Oh.
128
00:06:35,260 --> 00:06:37,972
It was different with us.
129
00:06:37,992 --> 00:06:40,431
He bought me an ergonomic
swivel chair.
130
00:06:40,432 --> 00:06:45,401
- I... I meant something to him!
- Course you did, Mary.
131
00:06:45,402 --> 00:06:48,541
That's why your tape's got Amanda
from logistics on the B side.
132
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:49,634
Right...
133
00:06:51,072 --> 00:06:53,063
I don't think
I can trust you two cats.
134
00:06:57,772 --> 00:07:01,941
- I can't believe it.
- You can't believe it? What about me?
135
00:07:01,942 --> 00:07:05,551
Not only was my husband
tiled alive to death,
136
00:07:05,552 --> 00:07:08,221
but then I find out he's spent
the last year of his life
137
00:07:08,222 --> 00:07:10,331
knobbing every bit of skirt
in this office,
138
00:07:10,332 --> 00:07:13,484
including your precious
Helen Stephens!
139
00:07:20,692 --> 00:07:24,071
I'm not saying that my share
of the lottery winnings
140
00:07:24,072 --> 00:07:25,540
is going to make up for that,
141
00:07:25,541 --> 00:07:31,101
but as the saying goes,
"Money is the Nurofen of the soul".
142
00:07:31,102 --> 00:07:33,251
Don't worry.
143
00:07:33,252 --> 00:07:35,334
We'll find that half million.
144
00:07:36,542 --> 00:07:37,801
What?
145
00:07:37,802 --> 00:07:39,702
It's more like a million, Henry.
146
00:07:40,992 --> 00:07:44,931
Oh. Sorry, yes. Yes, of course.
That's what I meant.
147
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:47,344
Yeah.
148
00:07:55,292 --> 00:07:58,331
Bijou, innit?
149
00:07:58,332 --> 00:08:03,702
Now get used to it cos you're going
to here a very, very long time.
150
00:08:14,932 --> 00:08:17,663
This is shit!
151
00:08:19,102 --> 00:08:20,181
Yoo-hoo!
152
00:08:20,182 --> 00:08:22,571
Oh! Gee...
153
00:08:22,572 --> 00:08:26,641
Just thought I'd pop in and say
what ho and welcome to D Wing.
154
00:08:26,642 --> 00:08:33,671
Oh. Thanks. I'd ask you in,
but it's too bijou.
155
00:08:33,672 --> 00:08:37,711
Well, what we lose in size we make
up for in atmosphere!
156
00:08:37,712 --> 00:08:39,071
I'm Jo by the way.
157
00:08:39,072 --> 00:08:41,361
Oh. Sorry. Helen.
158
00:08:41,362 --> 00:08:44,641
Oh, what a pretty name!
What are you in for, Helen?
159
00:08:44,642 --> 00:08:45,928
Well, murder...
160
00:08:45,929 --> 00:08:51,531
- Oh! The girls are going to love you!
- No, no. I'm innocent.
161
00:08:51,532 --> 00:08:53,831
I'm in for forgery.
162
00:08:53,832 --> 00:08:57,301
It's all really white collar stuff
here in D Wing.
163
00:08:57,302 --> 00:08:59,311
Fraud, tax evasion...
164
00:08:59,312 --> 00:09:01,258
Wonderful to have a killer
in our midst!
165
00:09:01,259 --> 00:09:04,001
I'm not a killer. OK?
Because I didn't do it.
166
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:07,001
If you don't mind I'm just going
to sit down on this
167
00:09:07,002 --> 00:09:11,741
bed shelf thing and just
be by myself!
168
00:09:11,742 --> 00:09:13,891
If you do feel up to it later on,
169
00:09:13,892 --> 00:09:19,331
I'm holding a mouthwash tasting at
four in my cell, three doors down.
170
00:09:19,332 --> 00:09:21,130
Love to see you there!
171
00:09:26,882 --> 00:09:30,341
I've got something to tell you.
It's...
172
00:09:30,342 --> 00:09:33,653
This is difficult to say, but I'm going
to try and find the right words.
173
00:09:35,082 --> 00:09:37,561
Helen was regularly having her
brains boffed out
174
00:09:37,562 --> 00:09:39,341
by Mr Bridges behind your back.
175
00:09:39,342 --> 00:09:43,331
What?
The randy old goat.
176
00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:45,111
Aren't you upset?
177
00:09:45,112 --> 00:09:47,731
Yeah! Oh, God, yeah!
178
00:09:47,732 --> 00:09:54,178
How could she, the cheating,
flipping... ninny.
179
00:09:59,172 --> 00:10:00,585
I need some time alone, I think.
180
00:10:00,672 --> 00:10:02,379
- Of course.
- You can stay though.
181
00:10:05,452 --> 00:10:07,091
Justin?
182
00:10:07,092 --> 00:10:08,831
You know this means...
183
00:10:08,832 --> 00:10:13,801
she didn't love you and that we
don't need to feel guilty about us.
184
00:10:13,802 --> 00:10:15,930
That's a good point, actually.
185
00:10:17,452 --> 00:10:19,343
But first,
you need to go into that prison,
186
00:10:19,422 --> 00:10:20,844
give her her alibi and finish it.
187
00:10:20,845 --> 00:10:25,001
You might have strong legs
and lovely sandy hair,
188
00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:28,561
but you are still engaged to my sister,
and that's a turn-off.
189
00:10:28,562 --> 00:10:30,883
I need you to end it with Helen.
190
00:10:32,312 --> 00:10:34,679
And then we can
get jiggy with it for sure.
191
00:10:39,532 --> 00:10:41,921
Ooh!
192
00:10:41,922 --> 00:10:44,691
And the only way they could identify
Mr Bridges
193
00:10:44,692 --> 00:10:48,341
was by the prints on his chopped-off finger
which they said I'd left flapping around.
194
00:10:49,892 --> 00:10:52,156
But you know, I didn't,
because I didn't kill him.
195
00:10:53,362 --> 00:10:55,891
Anyway, look, it was really kind
of you all to invite me in...
196
00:10:55,892 --> 00:10:57,861
Oh, Jesus.
197
00:10:57,862 --> 00:11:01,891
And, you know, if I was to choose,
I'd be, like...
198
00:11:01,892 --> 00:11:04,841
The 2011 Corsodyl has a nice,
citrus kick,
199
00:11:04,842 --> 00:11:08,311
but I'm just not really good company
at the moment, so...
200
00:11:08,312 --> 00:11:10,110
Did you say his name
was Eric Bridges?
201
00:11:10,111 --> 00:11:12,971
I know that name from somewhere.
202
00:11:14,122 --> 00:11:15,965
Maybe I had hot sex with him!
203
00:11:21,062 --> 00:11:25,091
What is this,
Sex in the City reunion, eh?
204
00:11:25,092 --> 00:11:28,181
OK, OK. Your secret's
safe with me, girls.
205
00:11:28,182 --> 00:11:30,621
Stephens, you've got
to call your sister.
206
00:11:30,622 --> 00:11:32,871
There's been a death in the family.
207
00:11:32,872 --> 00:11:34,772
It's OK. It's only your stepfather.
208
00:11:34,773 --> 00:11:37,281
Yeah, he fell off a roof this time.
Wink, wink.
209
00:11:37,282 --> 00:11:40,181
So sorry I haven't been in,
but it's been so very difficult
210
00:11:40,182 --> 00:11:43,931
- with Piccalilli being pregnant and all.
- What?!
211
00:11:43,951 --> 00:11:46,264
- How the hell did that happen?
- Oh, give him a break, OK?
212
00:11:46,287 --> 00:11:49,911
- He's young and single, so why not?
- Oh, for God's sake!
213
00:11:49,912 --> 00:11:52,461
I wish today would
just naff the naff off.
214
00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:54,481
Well, you won't want
today to naff off
215
00:11:54,482 --> 00:11:57,061
when I tell you I've
got some good news.
216
00:11:57,062 --> 00:11:58,393
Followed by some bad news.
217
00:11:58,394 --> 00:11:59,419
What?
218
00:12:00,532 --> 00:12:04,651
Well, the good news is,
wait for it...
219
00:12:04,652 --> 00:12:08,121
I've. Found. Justin!
220
00:12:08,122 --> 00:12:10,141
You've... You've found Justin?
221
00:12:10,142 --> 00:12:12,431
M-M-My Justin?
222
00:12:12,432 --> 00:12:13,791
What's the bad news?
223
00:12:13,792 --> 00:12:16,651
Laura, what's the bad news?
224
00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:18,851
Hello? Hello, Laura?
225
00:12:18,852 --> 00:12:20,961
I'll let him tell you that.
226
00:12:20,962 --> 00:12:23,451
Oh, yes! Yes!
227
00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:25,321
Oh! Oh, bad news. Ohhh!
228
00:12:25,322 --> 00:12:26,562
Oh, but yes! Yes!
229
00:12:26,563 --> 00:12:28,476
Oh, I don't know how to react.
230
00:12:35,402 --> 00:12:37,791
I think you've peed
her off no end, Mary.
231
00:12:37,792 --> 00:12:39,621
If she finds the money first,
232
00:12:39,622 --> 00:12:42,621
you can bet your bottom pound
we won't see a dime of it.
233
00:12:42,622 --> 00:12:44,731
Right now,
I don't care about the money.
234
00:12:44,732 --> 00:12:48,671
I can't stop thinking about
the last time Eric touched me.
235
00:12:48,672 --> 00:12:53,591
The electricity between us
made my hair stand on end,
236
00:12:53,592 --> 00:12:56,261
like someone had rubbed
a love balloon on it.
237
00:12:56,262 --> 00:13:02,261
He pulled me to him and I
remember his arms were wet,
238
00:13:02,262 --> 00:13:05,451
very wet,
all the way up to his elbows,
239
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:09,241
but I just didn't care.
I stayed there,
240
00:13:09,242 --> 00:13:12,761
breathing in his
Issey Miyake for Homme.
241
00:13:12,762 --> 00:13:14,921
Why were his arms wet, Mary?
242
00:13:14,922 --> 00:13:16,674
Oh!
243
00:13:41,452 --> 00:13:44,871
God, I've missed you so much!
244
00:13:44,872 --> 00:13:48,801
Slasher's taken your bunk.
She completely hogs the remote control.
245
00:13:48,802 --> 00:13:53,071
Helen, I've seen the same
episode of Top Gear 54 times.
246
00:13:53,072 --> 00:13:54,870
At least I think it's
the same episode.
247
00:13:54,871 --> 00:13:57,521
I mean, the storyline changes
but the jokes are the same.
248
00:13:57,522 --> 00:13:59,401
When are you coming back?
249
00:13:59,402 --> 00:14:03,051
Well, I'm not sure there's much point
Christine because, guess what?
250
00:14:03,052 --> 00:14:05,541
Justin's back!
I'm getting out of here!
251
00:14:08,072 --> 00:14:09,901
What does this mean?
252
00:14:09,902 --> 00:14:13,791
It means that this whole
nightmare is about to end.
253
00:14:13,792 --> 00:14:17,771
I'm going to get my appeal going again and
then I'm going to call the White Swan Hotel
254
00:14:17,772 --> 00:14:19,411
and rebook the Taylforth Suite.
255
00:14:19,412 --> 00:14:23,417
Oh, my God. This is it, Christine.
My life is back on.
256
00:14:25,412 --> 00:14:26,982
Yay!
257
00:14:43,412 --> 00:14:45,403
Oh, cold, cold, cold!
258
00:14:58,322 --> 00:15:00,331
Hello, you.
259
00:15:00,332 --> 00:15:03,991
I wanted to be the first to congratulate you
on your governorship of Broadmarsh,
260
00:15:03,992 --> 00:15:05,744
give you a little
tour of the prison.
261
00:15:05,745 --> 00:15:09,431
I really appreciate this but I haven't
actually been given the post officially.
262
00:15:09,432 --> 00:15:12,331
Well, a very important little
birdie tells me it's academic.
263
00:15:12,332 --> 00:15:15,151
- You've obviously been fingering the right pies.
- Sorry?
264
00:15:15,152 --> 00:15:16,756
This is one of our canteens.
265
00:15:17,822 --> 00:15:19,131
Carbonara.
266
00:15:19,132 --> 00:15:20,541
How exotic.
267
00:15:20,542 --> 00:15:23,681
Frank, this is Governor Gorey,
your new boss-to-be.
268
00:15:23,682 --> 00:15:27,001
It's not a hundred per cent
decided yet though, is it?
269
00:15:27,002 --> 00:15:29,211
Indeed, it's not.
270
00:15:29,212 --> 00:15:32,541
Ma'am, could I take a hour
extra for lunch today?
271
00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:33,611
Why?
272
00:15:33,612 --> 00:15:36,101
Erm... Nit nurse?
273
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:38,696
Let me show you the
staff chill-out area.
274
00:15:47,212 --> 00:15:48,751
Who's he?
275
00:15:48,752 --> 00:15:51,801
He is Walter "The Bouncer" Gorey.
276
00:15:51,802 --> 00:15:54,241
Looks like he's taking
over from the guv.
277
00:15:54,242 --> 00:15:55,425
What a well-groomed man.
278
00:15:55,447 --> 00:15:57,255
Why do they call him "The Bouncer"?
279
00:15:57,279 --> 00:16:00,471
Cos he runs his prisons like a nightclub.
One in, one out.
280
00:16:00,472 --> 00:16:03,351
If you got an appeal coming up,
he'll see you right.
281
00:16:13,972 --> 00:16:16,601
Oh, ha-ha, Christine!
Christine?
282
00:16:16,602 --> 00:16:18,891
What are you doing?
Who is this?
283
00:16:18,892 --> 00:16:21,051
- Where are you taking me?
- Hello? Hello?
284
00:16:21,052 --> 00:16:23,961
I hear your alibi's turned up.
285
00:16:23,962 --> 00:16:26,961
- How do you know that?
- I know everything.
286
00:16:26,962 --> 00:16:30,991
I also know this prison's about
to be taken over by The Bouncer,
287
00:16:30,992 --> 00:16:32,491
that liberal ponce.
288
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:35,251
Well, it's good news for me
cos I'm getting out of here.
289
00:16:35,252 --> 00:16:36,991
Exactly.
290
00:16:36,992 --> 00:16:42,331
And when you do, I don't want you
telling anyone you saw me in here,
291
00:16:42,332 --> 00:16:43,881
vous comprendi?
292
00:16:43,882 --> 00:16:46,601
My nieces think
I'm working for NASA.
293
00:16:46,602 --> 00:16:47,961
Really?
294
00:16:47,962 --> 00:16:51,051
Damn straight.
I'm a hero to those kids.
295
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:54,381
Plus, I'm the only person
in our school's history
296
00:16:54,382 --> 00:16:56,351
to have got a job in America.
297
00:16:56,352 --> 00:17:00,241
So... don't you go letting
the cat out of the bag,
298
00:17:00,242 --> 00:17:04,741
or I'll be putting your cat
in a bag, in the canal.
299
00:17:04,742 --> 00:17:06,164
Really?
300
00:17:07,412 --> 00:17:09,561
Well, I don't have a cat.
301
00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:12,680
I've got a border terrier, so...
302
00:17:14,862 --> 00:17:17,671
Well, I'll drown that an' all.
It's a big bag.
303
00:17:17,672 --> 00:17:20,414
You can't threaten me any more,
Miss Grainger.
304
00:17:22,412 --> 00:17:24,051
Do you know what?
305
00:17:24,052 --> 00:17:27,891
I feel sorry for you because you
may think you're king of this castle,
306
00:17:27,892 --> 00:17:31,271
but your castle is built on...
307
00:17:31,272 --> 00:17:34,469
You know, like,
dirty plughole hair and...
308
00:17:36,242 --> 00:17:39,155
And, and... spew.
309
00:17:40,692 --> 00:17:43,605
Yeah. I'm going to go with spew.
310
00:17:46,502 --> 00:17:48,561
Fatty!
311
00:17:48,562 --> 00:17:50,771
You all right, boss?
312
00:17:50,772 --> 00:17:52,781
Ow!
313
00:17:52,782 --> 00:17:54,801
- I am now.
- I'm fine.
314
00:17:54,802 --> 00:17:57,801
I'm fine, thanks. I'm fine.
315
00:17:57,802 --> 00:18:01,691
And this is where we keep
all the confiscated narcotics
316
00:18:01,692 --> 00:18:03,521
and paraphernalia.
317
00:18:03,522 --> 00:18:05,911
Weed, 'shrooms, meow meow, skunk,
318
00:18:05,912 --> 00:18:09,611
speed, speedballs, glue,
ketamine, MDMA, GBH,
319
00:18:09,612 --> 00:18:13,781
roofies, skag, and all the acid,
E, coke and crack
320
00:18:13,782 --> 00:18:15,716
you can wag a dirty fingernail at.
321
00:18:15,717 --> 00:18:17,761
That's a very well-organised stash.
322
00:18:17,762 --> 00:18:21,051
Well, that's the, uh,
beauty of stackable Tupperware.
323
00:18:21,052 --> 00:18:23,861
So, that's, uh, Broadmarsh.
324
00:18:27,052 --> 00:18:28,941
I've absolutely loved it.
325
00:18:30,187 --> 00:18:32,394
And I hope you will too.
326
00:18:32,406 --> 00:18:35,510
Thank you, Margaret.
You'll be an incredibly hard act to follow.
327
00:18:35,533 --> 00:18:37,691
I just want the chance to
help some of these poor women.
328
00:18:37,692 --> 00:18:39,231
Quite.
329
00:18:39,232 --> 00:18:42,304
Well, here's to a smooth transition.
330
00:18:48,512 --> 00:18:50,833
Cindy, get me the police.
331
00:18:55,122 --> 00:18:58,031
I think we pumiced
ten years off your feet.
332
00:18:58,032 --> 00:19:00,371
Yeah, my heels feel like velour!
333
00:19:00,372 --> 00:19:04,921
Oh, I just want my feet to look
their best for him, you know?
334
00:19:04,922 --> 00:19:07,221
Christine?
335
00:19:07,222 --> 00:19:08,781
Oh, hello.
336
00:19:09,752 --> 00:19:11,151
Who's this?
337
00:19:11,152 --> 00:19:14,761
Oh, this is Jo. Jo's got the
cell a few doors down from me.
338
00:19:14,762 --> 00:19:18,041
- Jo, this is Christine.
- Nice to meet you.
339
00:19:18,042 --> 00:19:19,385
What a pretty fringe.
340
00:19:20,902 --> 00:19:23,531
I tell you what.
If you're not busy after lunch,
341
00:19:23,532 --> 00:19:27,841
Maggie's fashioned a nib from a pigeon
feather and we're doing calligraphy,
342
00:19:27,842 --> 00:19:30,857
so if that sounds like your scene,
drop by.
343
00:19:32,582 --> 00:19:34,451
Helen, could I have a word?
344
00:19:34,452 --> 00:19:35,531
Sure.
345
00:19:35,532 --> 00:19:37,136
In private.
346
00:19:43,032 --> 00:19:47,151
I think you might be rushing into
this whole leaving prison thing.
347
00:19:47,152 --> 00:19:50,621
I just want you to be sure
you're making the right choice.
348
00:19:50,622 --> 00:19:53,082
And, apart from everything,
there is so much we haven't done yet.
349
00:19:53,094 --> 00:19:55,055
I've made a list.
350
00:19:55,079 --> 00:19:57,478
Christine, you always
knew I was going to go.
351
00:19:59,062 --> 00:20:00,694
I suppose Jo put you up to this.
352
00:20:00,718 --> 00:20:02,115
Put me up to what?
353
00:20:02,138 --> 00:20:05,431
Well, it's a bit of a weird coincidence
that the minute you meet Jo,
354
00:20:05,432 --> 00:20:08,011
you start getting ideas
about leaving prison.
355
00:20:08,012 --> 00:20:11,011
Did she ever think that you
might be better off behind bars?
356
00:20:11,012 --> 00:20:14,951
How could I possibly be better off
spending 16 hours a day locked in my cell,
357
00:20:14,952 --> 00:20:19,071
and the other eight hours avoiding
being violated with a Timotei bottle?
358
00:20:19,072 --> 00:20:22,211
You should be stoked I'm getting out.
I would be for you.
359
00:20:22,212 --> 00:20:26,201
Well, maybe you just don't know
me as well as you thought.
360
00:20:26,202 --> 00:20:28,961
Well, maybe you don't know
me as well as you thought.
361
00:20:28,962 --> 00:20:32,201
Oh, I know you.
I know you long time.
362
00:20:32,202 --> 00:20:34,781
Oh, you don't know me long time.
You know me three months.
363
00:20:34,782 --> 00:20:38,011
- Three months long time.
- Three months not long time. Not long time at all.
364
00:20:38,012 --> 00:20:40,161
Herro? Three months
is too long time.
365
00:20:40,162 --> 00:20:42,781
Too long time to serve
time for crime I not do.
366
00:20:44,892 --> 00:20:46,701
That's lunch.
367
00:20:51,552 --> 00:20:55,648
You leave here and you won't
be able to just walk back in.
368
00:21:08,282 --> 00:21:10,811
Sorry to have kept you waiting,
Mr Devon.
369
00:21:10,812 --> 00:21:13,406
Thank you so much for
coming to the interview.
370
00:21:22,632 --> 00:21:24,551
Thank you for coming in Mr Devon.
371
00:21:24,552 --> 00:21:27,361
- Thanks for your time.
- Yes.
372
00:21:27,362 --> 00:21:28,784
Pleased with that.
373
00:21:35,102 --> 00:21:36,376
Tony, it's Helen.
374
00:21:36,377 --> 00:21:39,311
Oh, it's you.
Tail between your legs is, it?
375
00:21:39,312 --> 00:21:43,061
Luckily, I'm the kind of guy who
needs the work more than the grudge.
376
00:21:43,062 --> 00:21:45,691
- Yeah, yeah. Sounds good. Listen, Tony...
- I've cracked it.
377
00:21:45,692 --> 00:21:50,421
Think of this case as a walnut
and me as the ornamental hammer.
378
00:21:50,422 --> 00:21:52,911
It was your fiance what done it.
379
00:21:52,912 --> 00:21:54,921
- What?
- Think about it.
380
00:21:54,922 --> 00:21:58,911
He's been missing since the murder,
he found out about your affair.
381
00:21:58,912 --> 00:22:01,721
- It was a crime of passion. Textbook.
- Really?
382
00:22:01,722 --> 00:22:05,191
Well, then how do you explain
the fact that he's come back for me?
383
00:22:05,192 --> 00:22:09,332
- My alibi's back, Tony. Justin's returned.
- Bloody what?
384
00:22:09,412 --> 00:22:10,550
Bloody what, indeed!
385
00:22:10,551 --> 00:22:13,861
So now you just have to get the
paperwork sorted and I am a free woman.
386
00:22:13,862 --> 00:22:17,091
There's a new governor starting
and he's got the horn for appeals.
387
00:22:17,092 --> 00:22:19,161
So you just have to
fill in the forms right,
388
00:22:19,162 --> 00:22:20,994
send them off on time,
and I'm out.
389
00:22:20,995 --> 00:22:24,131
And you'll have won a case.
You'll have won the case, Tony!
390
00:22:24,132 --> 00:22:25,315
I've won a case?
391
00:22:26,422 --> 00:22:29,981
Nah. Nah, there's something
not right here, Helen.
392
00:22:29,982 --> 00:22:32,471
No! You're wrong.
Everything is right here.
393
00:22:32,490 --> 00:22:33,840
I've got to go, Tony.
394
00:22:33,863 --> 00:22:37,111
There's a woman behind me who's started
sharpening her teeth with a nail file.
395
00:22:37,112 --> 00:22:38,819
But...
396
00:22:40,912 --> 00:22:43,621
What are you, 34B?
397
00:22:43,622 --> 00:22:45,501
- 34C, actually.
- Oh.
398
00:22:45,502 --> 00:22:48,551
I mean, between you and me,
a lot of that's ribcage.
399
00:22:48,552 --> 00:22:50,701
Hi, Helen.
Oh, hi, Jo.
400
00:22:50,702 --> 00:22:54,221
I was just wondering,
Slasher bit the head off a sparrow
401
00:22:54,222 --> 00:22:58,111
and we're doing potato prints
with its blood, if you fancy it?
402
00:22:58,112 --> 00:23:00,691
Both of you fancy it?
403
00:23:00,692 --> 00:23:03,831
No, that sounds disgusting.
Why would I want to do that?
404
00:23:03,832 --> 00:23:09,121
Well, because we used to like
to do things together, remember?
405
00:23:09,122 --> 00:23:10,635
I'll leave you to it.
406
00:23:14,092 --> 00:23:16,861
Trish is hosting an
etiquette class at three.
407
00:23:16,862 --> 00:23:21,031
We're learning how to get in and out of
prison vans without flashing our pin pins.
408
00:23:21,032 --> 00:23:24,002
Maybe see you girls there?
409
00:23:28,622 --> 00:23:30,311
Look, Christine I wanted to say...
410
00:23:30,312 --> 00:23:34,291
Look, I'm sorry for what I said before.
We're best friends.
411
00:23:34,292 --> 00:23:35,841
Nothing can change that.
412
00:23:35,842 --> 00:23:39,451
And just because we're not in the same cell,
or the same prison,
413
00:23:39,452 --> 00:23:43,531
or... Even if one of us is killed,
and the other one survives,
414
00:23:43,532 --> 00:23:46,811
it doesn't mean that we're not
still friends forever and ever
415
00:23:46,812 --> 00:23:50,471
and ever and ever and ever
and ever and ever.
416
00:23:50,472 --> 00:23:53,141
I want to give you something,
just to say thanks for being
417
00:23:53,142 --> 00:23:55,884
the best cellmate in prison
any inmate could ever ask for.
418
00:24:02,702 --> 00:24:04,151
Oh, Helen.
419
00:24:04,152 --> 00:24:05,722
I love it.
420
00:24:06,922 --> 00:24:11,246
This means more to me than anything
I've ever imagined us doing together.
421
00:24:12,312 --> 00:24:14,561
In return,
I want you to have something.
422
00:24:14,562 --> 00:24:17,511
And it's something that
since the moment I got it,
423
00:24:17,512 --> 00:24:19,879
- I never thought I'd part with.
- Oh.
424
00:24:27,372 --> 00:24:31,843
It was my most treasured possession.
Oh!
425
00:24:33,702 --> 00:24:35,291
Thanks, Christine.
426
00:24:35,292 --> 00:24:39,461
I can't believe I might be actually
getting out of this hellhole.
427
00:24:39,462 --> 00:24:42,651
I'm going to Sheppey!
I'm going with you to Sheppey!
428
00:24:42,652 --> 00:24:44,404
I've left my wife.
It's all systems go.
429
00:24:44,405 --> 00:24:46,591
I mean, I'll miss the kids,
and the house,
430
00:24:46,592 --> 00:24:50,201
but, you know, sometimes it's nice
to have nothing, start afresh.
431
00:24:50,202 --> 00:24:52,871
Sorry for that interruption,
Sir Roger.
432
00:24:52,872 --> 00:24:54,791
As you were saying...
433
00:24:54,792 --> 00:24:57,701
Yes. Gorey was caught
with a drugs pipe
434
00:24:57,702 --> 00:25:00,881
and several rocks
in his coat pocket.
435
00:25:00,882 --> 00:25:05,241
He swears he has no idea how they got there,
but that's what all the crackheads say.
436
00:25:05,242 --> 00:25:07,541
How very disappointing.
437
00:25:07,542 --> 00:25:11,991
So if Margaret's going to Sheppey,
who will be taking over here?
438
00:25:11,992 --> 00:25:15,841
Well, as the standard of the other
applicant was so depressingly low,
439
00:25:15,842 --> 00:25:19,211
we have no option but to ask
Margaret to stay on at Broadmarsh,
440
00:25:19,212 --> 00:25:20,304
if that suits you.
441
00:25:21,412 --> 00:25:24,041
Sheppey will just have to wait.
442
00:25:24,042 --> 00:25:28,696
I'd be delighted...
if it helps you out of a sticky hole.
443
00:25:32,522 --> 00:25:34,422
I've left my wife.
444
00:25:45,982 --> 00:25:49,418
Er... Er, I'm going to have
to ask you to sign in, sir.
445
00:25:51,842 --> 00:25:53,640
Of course.
446
00:26:09,692 --> 00:26:11,729
Go ahead, Mr Fembwick.
447
00:26:52,442 --> 00:26:54,900
Dear Maurice, if I have
learnt one thing in prison,
448
00:26:54,901 --> 00:26:59,241
it's that fabric conditioner makes little
or no difference in an industrial wash.
449
00:26:59,242 --> 00:27:03,131
And also that real, true prison friendship
is something to be treasured.
450
00:27:03,132 --> 00:27:08,001
Saying that, I am finding it tricky to
keep two women satisfied platonically.
451
00:27:08,002 --> 00:27:10,961
I can only imagine
how Simon Cowell must feel.
452
00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:15,461
My big news is that my fiance
and alibi Justin has returned,
453
00:27:15,462 --> 00:27:21,411
and I imagine that right now, he's charging
over here on his white steed to set me free.
454
00:27:21,412 --> 00:27:25,111
It's only a matter of time before
I'm the next Mrs Justin Augustin.
455
00:27:25,112 --> 00:27:27,551
I'd like to send you a
wedding invite, Maurice.
456
00:27:27,552 --> 00:27:31,821
I would give you a plus one but I think I
remember you saying you'd killed your wife.
457
00:27:31,822 --> 00:27:34,251
All the best.
Your friend Helen.
458
00:27:34,252 --> 00:27:37,491
Hello, ladies.
How's it going?
459
00:27:37,492 --> 00:27:41,381
Oh, listen, Helen.
You know that name Eric Bridges?
460
00:27:41,382 --> 00:27:44,141
I've remembered where
I know it from.
461
00:27:44,142 --> 00:27:46,961
I made a fake passport
for an Eric Bridges.
462
00:27:46,962 --> 00:27:49,021
Really? When?
463
00:27:49,022 --> 00:27:52,821
Actually, it was my last job before
I got banged up, so 15th of May.
464
00:27:52,822 --> 00:27:57,131
Oh. It must be another guy because
Eric was definitely dead by then.
465
00:27:57,132 --> 00:28:01,211
Well, the chap I made it for
needed a passport pronto.
466
00:28:01,212 --> 00:28:03,781
And the reason he
stays in my memory
467
00:28:03,782 --> 00:28:06,641
is he's the only man I've been with
468
00:28:06,642 --> 00:28:09,271
who had to give himself
a pep talk to climax.
469
00:28:09,272 --> 00:28:12,551
"I think I can, I think I can..."
470
00:28:12,552 --> 00:28:15,294
"I know I can, I know I can."
471
00:28:18,462 --> 00:28:20,157
He's alive.
472
00:28:20,178 --> 00:28:22,655
Sync, corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com
473
00:28:22,705 --> 00:28:27,255
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