All language subtitles for Dead Boss s01e04.eng

I now sentence you
to twelve years!

Objection!

I'm taking away
the Nespresso machine.

Helen! You could help me
find Justin.

Can I have your Fitness First card?

You were my supply teacher
at senior school.

Too little,

too late.

We won the lottery!
Yes!

Don't you tell anyone about this.

Shhh!

- You can't represent me against my will.
- Yes, I bloody can.

I'm Justin.

What are you doing in my flat?

Mashta Fembuick...
Well, this changes everything.

Bingo!

Sync, corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com

Dear Maurice,
thank you for your postcard.

In answer to your query - I did
experiment with that as a teenager,

although I soon realised -
lady's top half, fine,

bottom half- nooo, thank you.
But never say never!

I've been in Broadmarsh
eight weeks now,

though it feels like yesterday
I was trying on wedding dresses

and deciding on our first dance -

anything by Daniel Bedingfield -
not Gotta Get Thru This.

My lawyer, Tony,
has been about as useful to me

as a dandelion tincture
in the face of cancer,

so I'm afraid, at the moment,
we're on non speakers.

Can't help thinking,
I should forget lawyers

and handle my case myself.

I'm sure you'd give me the same advice,
although as you say,

it's different for you because you
did actually kill all those people.

Helen!

I'm fine. I'm fine.

There's still no sign
of my darling fiance, Justin.

Aside from the fact
that I need my alibi,

I'm worried he's changed
his mind about the wedding.

But I need to be positive.

Maybe he's had a terrible accident
and is in a coma somewhere.

- Was the sofa OK to sleep on?
- Yeah.

Sorry you couldn't sleep in your bed,
Helen's bed.

Oh, I'm off to see Helen.
She requested a visit.

I should tell her you're back.
When are you going in?

I think I might leave it
a couple more days.

I'm still getting over my jet lag.

You can get jet lag
from the Eurostar?

Well, it's certainly
taken it out of me.

I'd appreciate it if you didn't
mention anything about me...

You know, being... alive.

I need a bit more time.

These last few months have been
an emotional roller coaster.

Maybe I need to unlock here,

before I can... unlock her.

- I need your help.
- I'm very well, thanks for asking.

- How are you?
- Oh, God, just... Shhh!

OK?

I'm thinking about
representing myself now.

What? What's Tony going to do?
He needs this job, Helen.

This is about me, not Tony.

It's always about you,
that's the problem.

If you weren't so selfish,
maybe you wouldn't be in prison.

Shut up! I'm selfish?

You've visited me once
in the last eight weeks.

I was waiting in
for a parcel from Eye Secrets.

Oh, it's not about that, OK?

I need your help because I'm
thinking about teaching myself law.

You know, Like Erin Brockovich
or the Lorenzo's Oil guys.

Really? No offence, Helen,

but I used to copy your old homework

until I realised I got better grades
if I didn't hand anything in.

I've always thought I'd make
a fantastic lawyer, though.

Good, because I need you to assist me.
You'd have more access to books

and together,
we could get me out of here.

Listen Helen, I'd love to,
but I've got a very busy life.

I'm out two to three nights a week.

That's a shame.

It's just... I thought
it might make a good story

if we ever felt like
selling the film rights.

What film rights?

The Hollywood film deal.

Think about it.

They're crying out for a story
like this - two sisters,

separated by prison,

one of them in for a crime
she didn't commit.

- Younger sister played by...
- Beyonce?

I don't know if that would work,
because I was thinking

- Jennifer Aniston could play me.
- Or Whoopi Goldberg.

Anyway, younger sister learns law
to a top level,

gets older sister out.
It's got everything.

Yeah, I suppose it does.

What, I'd just have to
learn some law?

Yeah!

You'd have to get your skates on
because my appeal's looming

I think representing myself
could really work.

No-one gives more of a shit
about me than me.

Is that my cardigan?

I'm actually quite excited
about this.

I once had a try-out
for the school debating team.

Didn't get in, but, you know,

it shows the seeds were sown.

Wow. When you do get out of here,

and I get out of here
and you get married to Justin,

can I be your maid of honour?

I don't know, Christine...

I've got loads of funny stories
for the speech,

like the time you were
given a cavity search,

and accidentally
called the warden Mum.

Wow!

That's a Lorra, Lorra Law.

What the hell?

Where's all the books?

Found one!

Mornin' ladies, yeah?

Having fun with the books, yawn.

- Can we help you with something?
- It's the first of the month.

You know what that means?

- White rabbits!
- Shut up.

It means payday.

Top Dog wants four fags,
from everyone.

You do this, Christine?

I've got mine on direct debit,
so I don't have to worry about it.

Well, I haven't smoked since
my first Holy Communion,

so you'll have to get
your snouts elsewhere.

Right. Well, I think Top Dog will
find other ways to make you pay.

Like with biscuits.

I'll leave you with this
to think about.

Margaret, I think I know
what this is about,

and first of all,
she's a lying skank,

and what's more, I was just patting
her there because she looked upset.

- Take your top off, Frank.
- OK.

- What?
- Off.

Now. Get it off.

And the vest.

- I want you...
- Yeah...

Here, midday tomorrow.

Eh?

I'm going to paint you, Frank.

- Like a model?
- Yes, like a model.

Ha. I'm a bloody model!

And Frank...

Yes, ma'am?

It wasn't a pat, it was a squeeze.

You're on six weeks library duty for
touching up the prison chaplain.

Get out.

All right, yeah.

Hello, Entirely Tiles,
can I put you on hold?

Hello, Entirely Tiles,
can I put you on hold?

- Hello, Entirely Tiles, can I put you on hold?
- 'Sorry.'

Hello, Entirely Tiles,
can I put you on hold?

Hello, Entirely Tiles...

Friday 11.24,
Entirely Tiles offices.

Tony Norman is continuing with his...
my endeavours,

despite the client's protestations.

This is my chance
to show Helen Stephens

I am the right man for the job.

Hello, Entirely Tiles,
can I put you on hold?

VACUUM WHIRRS

I appear to be in some
sort of storeroom.

At first inspection,
seems normal enough -

catalogues, ring binders,
dividers,

four-colour biros

paper-A3 and A4,

oh, prickly thimbles...
various colours.

Nothing untoward.

I think I'll just lay low
in here for a bit,

and then

resume my investigation
when the coast is clear.

CLATTERING

TOP DOG SNIFFS

This one's menthol.

Who smokes menthol,
for flop's sake?

We thought you'd like it
as a pudding fag.

Oh yeah, like an after fag, fag.

- It's the last straw.
- That was Fatty's fault.

I don't give a pilchard's turd
whose fault it is.

You can't even run

a basic fag extortion
payment scheme!

It's not good enough.

I'm sick of you.

I'm going to get a new posse.

You're fired.

And I'm taking back your nicknames.

- What?
- You 'eard.

Clare.

Imogen.

Claire with an I.

Sarah.

Sorry, I've forgotten your name.

- Clare.
- Clare!

Ssh, Piccalilli.
I'm trying to nail my sister's case.

I'm not going to think about
anything other than this case.

I'm literally 1,000% the law right now.
I'm like Robocop.

I need to focus on justice.

What are you looking at?

We need a new boss.

You've got to be shitting me.

Listen to me, we need to move fast.

Without a leader, we're just
a violent friendship circle.

We need a proper psycho.

She might say she didn't do it
but they all say that.

She's definitely a killer.

Mary. We need to talk...
Argh!

Erm, you've got a little bit of...

What do you want?

I just saw Helen Stephens' lawyer
snooping around.

Have you told anyone
about the missing money?

No. I haven't.

The only people who know about that
money are you and a dead man.

And now me. You, me and a dead man.

Why is he here then, eh?
Seems a weird coincidence.

I don't know. Maybe it's got something
to do with that murdering bitch

who killed our boss in this very
office for no reason.

Oh, my God.
That's why she killed him,

- Stephens knew about the money.
- Take that back!

- Helen didn't kill anyone.
- How can you be so sure?

Because when you've looked into
Helen's eyes as deeply as I have,

you can see right through
to her frontal lobe.

And that frontal lobe
wouldn't hurt a fly.

Well, what about Mrs Bridges?

Call it women's intuition,
but that bitch is all over this.

Did you just let off?

I most certainly did not.

Listen to me. We need to move fast.

You need to go into the prison
and find out

whether that slag Helen knows
anything about the money.

Call it women's intuition,
but that bitch is all over this.

- You just said that about Mrs Bridges.
- What can I say?

- I've got a very sensitive bitch-dar.
- OK.

But when we go back out there,

we just need to act
like everything's normal.

The last thing we need is Mrs Bridges
getting wind of any of this.

My office. Now.

Do you actually know
anything about the law?

Yeah. Well, I've read
all the John Grisham novels.

But I want to be all over the legalese -
Go in there and really dazzle them.

I'm going to read every word of this pamphlet,
so there's nothing they can pull me up on.

Do you want to see if you can
find a legal precedent?

I don't think so. No offence to me,
but I'm borderline backward.

I see myself as more of a
"holding the ladder" type.

Oh!

Shhh!

Is she bothering you, boss?

- Why are you calling me boss?
- Because you're our boss now.

No, I am not!
What about Miss Grainger?

- Who?
- Top Dog.

- What about Top Dog?
- That's over.

We're yours now.

Well, I'm really flattered

but I'm not looking to be anyone's
leader right now.

I'm just a humble law student

looking to learn
my way out of here,

so unless any of you
know anything about law...

- Does anyone know anything about law?
- I used to be a barrister.

- Really?
- Yeah, in Starbucks.

Shut up.

- Sorry, Boss.
- Stop calling me boss.

- I'm not your boss.
- You have been chosen.

Deal with it.

Ever since I got here, youse two
have been up to something.

Whispering in your little corners,
secret meetings in the cupboard.

Either youse two is nobbin' each other,
which I don't want to think about,

or there's something
even nastier goin' on.

We were planning this
year's Secret Santa.

In frickin' March?

- Secret Easter bunny?
- Oh. Really?

Well if you're so organised,

how comes I ain't been asked to
put in for the office lotto yet?

Oh, yeah.

I've been going through this book.

I don't want miss out on all this
good luck you've been having.

�87 last year.

That's a lot of moolah.

Where'd you get that book from?

From the third drawer
down of your desk.

That is your desk, innit, Mary?

In fairness to Mary, the lottery's
only just been resumed.

Helen Stephens was in charge of it

but since she's been banged up
in chokey, it's sort of gone to pot.

Mary's on it now.

Well, I am glad to hear it.

Anyone got change for a 50?

Well, here's to a big win.

May I say, Elaine,
you're an inspiration to us.

If you can move on from your Eric's
untimely murder so quickly,

then so can we.

You're very brave. Some would say
cold, but I say businesslike.

Thank you, Henry.
That'll be all.

Oh, and Mary.

I like a joke as much as the next person,
but this is racially inappropriate.

- That bitch knows something.
- I know that bitch knows something!

Sorry, sorry, Mary.

Listen to me.
This shit just got real.

I'll find out what that tart Bridges
is up to, you find out what

that money-loving-cow Stephens
really knows.

How?

Try looking into her frontal lobe
a little bit deeper this time.

- Now?
- No.

- Now?
- No.

- Now?
- All right.

- Now?
- Oh, for fu...

Right - everyone out.
I'm shutting shop.

No, we're entitled to
another 40 minutes library time.

Oh, I do apologise,

I forgot this was
the University of... like...

you know, Swotty Boffins.

Let me just check with the dean.

He says piss the piss off.

So, I don't think anyone
believed you existed

until Helen announced her
engagement.

You sure have
been on a long stag do!

It wasn't planned.

I was out in Prague and I kinda had
this epiphany at a U2 concert,

and well, I just decided to
follow them on tour.

Well, you're not the first man
to get cold feet

and follow Bono round the world,
and you certainly won't be the last.

I'm not sure my incarcerated sister
would understand, though.

Yeah, I know,
I'm going to sort it out.

I just don't think
now's the right time.

Helen's only just
settled into prison life.

She doesn't need another
big shock at the moment.

I'll go and see her soon. Promise.

Here you are. Try this?

What is that?

Tomato cup-a-soup
and Lea and Perrine sauce.

Mmm.

Shit.

I work well individually
and as part of a team,

I'd really like to learn more about
bullying and general scaremongering,

and I think I'd bring a lot to the
overarching threat of this group.

Very good.

And have you any experience
of being in a gang?

Yes, I spent three years in a
fairly judgmental book group?

How about combat?
Karate, jujitsu, boxing?

I'm pretty good at Zumba.

Good luck.

Thought we'd find you here.

We sorted out that skank Bella
what was looking at you funny.

Bella? She's blind.

A thank you would be nice.

I'm not thanking you
for beating up a blind woman.

We don't just beat up blind people
willy-nilly where I come from.

I will not have this violence in my name.
I won't have it.

Will I not give her this then?

- What, is the library closed?
- Yeah.

Want us to open it for you?

- No, it's fine.
- It's easy.

- Seriously just leave it.
- You just...

What are you doing?
Don't do that!

What were we just saying about not
having violence in my...

Oh, nice one.

Ooh. Sorry boss.

Just a bit higher?
Up like that? Is that better?

Yeah.

Margaret, how could you?
With him!

Do you know how many times I've pictured
us making love on your chaise longue?

And then I walk in
and find you with him!

What kind of sick role-play is this?

I'm painting 'Poseidon's Return'
and Frank is modelling for me.

- Up a bit, Frank.
- Like that, yeah?

Enter.

Chitara, can you not?
What do you want?

Um, I just wondered
if I could have a word?

Speak.

In private?

Double clap means leave, yeah?
You bunch of whippet's shit-holes.

- They seem nice.
- What's it to you?

Nothing! Just you look naturally
good with a posse.

And?

It's just a shame you had to
get rid of the old ones.

You and your old crew had a certain
horrible je ne sais quoi.

So you did learn something
in my French class

when you weren't putting
excrement in my Radley handbag.

Yeah, well, since leaving school,

I've owned a mid-range handbag
myself and I realise now that

that kind of thing is actually
really not that funny.

Shut up. Why're you here?

Well, just...
Lenny's been asking for you.

She really misses you.
They all do.

Well, I've moved on.
That's over.

I've got a new posse now
so get out.

OK, just, very quickly wanted to say
the girls would love to see you...

I'm going to kill you in a moment.

Don't do that! A bientot.

She was holding her breath to stop
the hiccups. She passed out.

Stephens.

Tell Lenny I'll see her.

Day two. So thirsty.

I've finished the last
of the Blu-Tack.

It's not that disgusting if you
imagine it as a spring roll.

Things aren't looking good.

If I don't make it out of here
alive,

I'd like my ex-wife, Rita,
to have my TV and cafetiere

and to my stepson, I leave my
collection of Carole King LPs.

And to my client, Helen Stephens,
I'd like to leave this message.

Don't trust anyone from your office.

So, I've been thinking,
well, Fatty's been thinking...

and she don't know if this, us,
is going anywhere.

So, you know, Fatty thinks
we should call it a day.

It's not you... It's Fatty.

Fine.
Well, good luck with everything.

Is that all you can say?

Erm... I don't like you?

You cold-hearted bitch.

OK.

My God, I can't believe
I wasted the best days

of my week following you around.

Come on, Fatty.
Top Dog needs her ears syringing.

You're looking bonny, Helen.
Have you gained a little weight?

You try eating nothing
but carbonara for two months.

No, it's just nice to see a bit
more of you, that's all.

I got an e-mail from Laura saying that
you're representing yourself now.

Wow. Body and brains!
How's that going?

Good. I mean, it's not going great,
but in a good way.

So you haven't told your lawyer
anything that you haven't told me?

No.

As far as I'm concerned, Tony Norman
and I are on non-speakers.

Good.

It's just I'm supposed to
be your man on the inside,

looking for clues and whatnot,
and we don't want your lawyer

trampling all over all the good
work we've started.

All the progress we've made.

Really? What progress have we made
finding Justin?

Can I suggest, Helen,
close friend to close friend,

that you let this Justin dream,
alibi, excuse,

whatever you want to call it,
just let it go.

You need someone reliable, you need a
Vauxhall Astra not some flash Golf GTI.

Which, let's face it,
is quite expensive to insure.

Yeah. I'll bear that in mind.

Thanks, Henry,
for whatever it is you're doing.

I'll talk to Tony,
find out what he's been up to.

Sounds like a plan, Stan!

Have a great weekend.

C'mere you.

Henry, you forgot your...

Toadpole TS, Manchasteton, IE.

Dear Maurice,
thank you for your latest drawing.

I've never imagined
myself as half woman half prawn,

but it was actually quite
a good likeness!

I've realised representing myself isn't
going to be as easy as I first thought,

especially now that Lenny and the posse have
beaten up every law book in the library.

And to make matters worse,
my sister Laura has also downed tools

after receiving a very curt
E-mail from Halle Berry's agent.

Maybe I was wrong to
give up on Tony.

Right now I need all the allies
I can get.

Either you're taking this secret Easter
bunny lark a bit too seriously, Mary,

or you need to tell me exactly
what is going on.

Sync, corrected by icephoenix
www.addic7ed.com

Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0