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1
00:00:01,900 --> 00:00:05,139
- Everyone fucks... everyone
...eventually. - Hey! Sugar-tits.
2
00:00:05,140 --> 00:00:07,299
Don't speak to him. She is red zone!
3
00:00:07,300 --> 00:00:08,499
She's basically my sister.
4
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:10,579
He calls her "my Lulu".
5
00:00:10,580 --> 00:00:13,459
I'm not in love with you.
6
00:00:13,460 --> 00:00:16,459
Why are you wearing a hat?
7
00:00:16,460 --> 00:00:18,619
Colin! 'I think
you should live with me.'
8
00:00:18,620 --> 00:00:22,620
I think you would like being painted.
I would be generous with your penis.
9
00:00:23,420 --> 00:00:26,979
- Fred.
- Yeah. - This ain't never gonna happen.
10
00:00:26,980 --> 00:00:30,980
OK.
11
00:00:47,700 --> 00:00:50,139
Oh, please, if you're about to
say something like
12
00:00:50,140 --> 00:00:52,779
"porn is killing sex" we are
going to have a massive argument.
13
00:00:52,780 --> 00:00:55,539
- Please don't say it.
- Porn is killing sex. - Bring it.
14
00:00:55,540 --> 00:00:58,419
Listen, hot chops, I've wanked over
the entire internet.
15
00:00:58,420 --> 00:01:02,420
Computer screens used to give me
faster boners than a flash of a tit and that is NOT normal.
16
00:01:02,460 --> 00:01:05,619
- Can we please stop talking about porn?
- Lulu, you're supposed to be helping me!
17
00:01:05,620 --> 00:01:08,979
You know that a common side
effect of excessive porn use is erectile dysfunction...
18
00:01:08,980 --> 00:01:12,059
- Are you getting better boners?
- What do you think is holding the table up?
19
00:01:12,060 --> 00:01:13,419
Lulu, kitchen now!
20
00:01:13,420 --> 00:01:16,019
- Guys, am I too much?
- Aiiiiiiii! Aiiiii! - Hot, hot, hot!
21
00:01:16,020 --> 00:01:18,019
You look lovely.
22
00:01:18,020 --> 00:01:19,979
Cheers. Sam helped.
23
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:23,339
Ladies and gentlemen...
This is my greatest achievement.
24
00:01:23,340 --> 00:01:27,340
You look SO hot!
25
00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,539
Here, try this.
26
00:01:35,540 --> 00:01:36,579
Is it a hot one?
27
00:01:36,580 --> 00:01:39,059
No. It's sweet.
28
00:01:39,060 --> 00:01:42,579
Oh, yeah. Thank you for letting me
stay here.
29
00:01:42,580 --> 00:01:44,659
I know it can't have been ideal me
30
00:01:44,660 --> 00:01:47,379
just... turning up
out of the... Oh, my GOD!
31
00:01:47,380 --> 00:01:51,380
You are a BASTARD! You bastard!
You bastard!
32
00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:55,219
I should have seen it
coming, you fucker!
33
00:01:55,220 --> 00:01:57,379
Fred, where's your date?
We need to get going.
34
00:01:57,380 --> 00:01:59,739
- I'll call him again.
- Stood UUPPP.
35
00:01:59,740 --> 00:02:01,699
- He's probably just got stuck on a...
- Penis.
36
00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:02,939
- Train.
- Penis train.
37
00:02:02,940 --> 00:02:04,939
He'll be here. He's very reliable.
38
00:02:04,940 --> 00:02:07,579
Whoohoo! Reliable!
39
00:02:07,580 --> 00:02:10,219
So, go on, pray tell us
all about the penis train.
40
00:02:10,220 --> 00:02:14,220
Oh, yeah, well... He-he's lovely.
Yeah, he's really, um...
41
00:02:15,780 --> 00:02:18,939
He's just so nice to me,
I-I don't...
42
00:02:18,940 --> 00:02:22,940
I just... I mean, it's... early days.
43
00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:25,059
What's wrong with you? It's broken.
44
00:02:25,060 --> 00:02:27,979
- Oh, it's broken!
- Don't mess me up, OK? I like him.
45
00:02:27,980 --> 00:02:31,139
Yeah sure. Never seen you look
so sexy.
46
00:02:31,140 --> 00:02:34,219
OK, here we go.
Can we move that, please?
47
00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:35,579
- Yup.
- OK.
48
00:02:35,580 --> 00:02:39,580
Tonight there will be three curries -
this first one is...
49
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,419
Vindalulu?!
50
00:02:41,420 --> 00:02:44,339
Yeah. No.
Now it's called Katie Korma.
51
00:02:44,340 --> 00:02:46,379
What?! But it's not even a korma.
52
00:02:46,380 --> 00:02:50,380
No, it's always been a korma.
You were just so chuffed with your wordplay I couldn't break it to you.
53
00:02:50,460 --> 00:02:52,659
- Wow.
- It was named after you first?
54
00:02:52,660 --> 00:02:56,059
Oh, it seems I was
just the holding name until he got himself an actual girlfriend.
55
00:02:56,060 --> 00:02:57,139
Fiancee.
56
00:02:57,140 --> 00:03:00,139
Fiancee. Sorry,
I forgot people still did that.
57
00:03:00,140 --> 00:03:02,339
Don't get weird about it.
It's a curry.
58
00:03:02,340 --> 00:03:03,939
I'm not being weird about it!
59
00:03:03,940 --> 00:03:05,819
He meant her.
60
00:03:05,820 --> 00:03:07,459
That's embarrassing.
61
00:03:07,460 --> 00:03:09,019
Ah. I'll get over it.
62
00:03:09,020 --> 00:03:11,979
- Where's Melody?
- She's still painting Colin. - I bet she is.
63
00:03:11,980 --> 00:03:15,980
Lulu, go get her.
64
00:03:16,900 --> 00:03:20,900
ALL CHAT
65
00:03:22,740 --> 00:03:26,740
Mate, if this bhaji was a hat,
Kate would wear it to work.
66
00:03:26,820 --> 00:03:30,619
It's like you've come in my mouth.
67
00:03:30,620 --> 00:03:32,419
Thanks, guys. And the chutney?
68
00:03:32,420 --> 00:03:36,420
ALL COMMENT AT ONCE
69
00:03:36,660 --> 00:03:40,299
Mmmm, tastes like cunt.
70
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:41,659
Thanks, baby.
71
00:03:41,660 --> 00:03:43,579
- INDIAN ACCENT: OK, OK, OK.
- Don't.
72
00:03:43,580 --> 00:03:45,699
But why not-ah? It's curry night!
73
00:03:45,700 --> 00:03:46,819
It's offensive.
74
00:03:46,820 --> 00:03:48,059
What? WHY? I'm good at it...
75
00:03:48,060 --> 00:03:50,659
No, you're not.
Can we just serve the curry?
76
00:03:50,660 --> 00:03:52,219
- Yeah.
- But why is it offensive?
77
00:03:52,220 --> 00:03:55,779
- IRISH ACCENT: Would you say that
this is offensive, now Anthony? - Yes. Very.
78
00:03:55,780 --> 00:03:58,539
AMERICAN ACCENT: Is this? This is,
like, totally offensive, right?
79
00:03:58,540 --> 00:04:01,339
- Doing an Indian accent is different.
- Why can't I do an Indian accent?
80
00:04:01,340 --> 00:04:05,340
I'm not taking the piss
out of Indian people, I'm just doing the accent-ah on curry nigh t-ah!
81
00:04:05,940 --> 00:04:07,459
It's racist. OK.
82
00:04:07,460 --> 00:04:08,899
How is it racist?!
83
00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:11,459
It just is. It makes me
feel uncomfortable.
84
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:14,739
- Because it makes you feel like
you are around Indian people? - No. I didn't say...
85
00:04:14,740 --> 00:04:17,779
- Am I making you feel uncomfortable, Kate?
- Do you want him to leave?
86
00:04:17,780 --> 00:04:21,539
I just feel there are certain
connotations that come with mocking certain accents.
87
00:04:21,540 --> 00:04:23,579
Come on,
it's not the 1980s any more.
88
00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:26,019
You can do an accent without it
being mocking!
89
00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:28,579
POSH ACCENT: Is this offending
any of you, darlings?
90
00:04:28,580 --> 00:04:29,939
I just got hard.
91
00:04:29,940 --> 00:04:33,940
You can't censor an Indian
accent just because it makes YOU feel uncomfortable.
92
00:04:33,980 --> 00:04:35,459
If anything, that's racist.
93
00:04:35,460 --> 00:04:39,460
I don't know why it makes me
feel weird. It just does.
94
00:04:40,140 --> 00:04:42,619
EXAGGERATED ACCENT:
Oh, do the accent, Katy.
95
00:04:42,620 --> 00:04:44,779
LAUGHTER AND ENCOURAGEMENT
96
00:04:44,780 --> 00:04:47,019
Do the accent, Katy.
97
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,579
No!
98
00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:50,619
Can we just, um...
99
00:04:50,620 --> 00:04:53,619
The pomegranate seeds might be
a little bit too much, I'm not sure.
100
00:04:53,620 --> 00:04:57,620
- What, there's...
- They're in the raita.
101
00:04:58,140 --> 00:05:02,140
EXAGGERATED INDIAN ACCENT: I'm going
to pop my belly if I don't have my papadums soon, ya?
102
00:05:02,460 --> 00:05:06,460
You understand me, ya?
103
00:05:09,820 --> 00:05:10,979
Maybe it is racist.
104
00:05:10,980 --> 00:05:13,579
Jesus, Kate.
105
00:05:13,580 --> 00:05:15,339
This is really beautiful food.
106
00:05:15,340 --> 00:05:18,299
Yeah, with herbs it would be even
better, actually.
107
00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:22,139
It shouldn't really need herbs.
108
00:05:22,140 --> 00:05:25,939
The worst thing about it is,
a part of him always knew it was
109
00:05:25,940 --> 00:05:29,659
happening, but he was just too
much of a coward to be alone.
110
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,819
He'd rather have her while she's
being licked out by her accountant,
111
00:05:32,820 --> 00:05:34,539
than not have her at all.
112
00:05:34,540 --> 00:05:38,540
Romantic, pathetic, beautiful.
It's so many things.
113
00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:45,100
Wow.
114
00:05:45,340 --> 00:05:48,259
Yes, I wasn't expecting her to
tell you all that.
115
00:05:48,260 --> 00:05:49,659
You're through the worst now.
116
00:05:49,660 --> 00:05:53,019
He also has sometimes touched himself
thinking of the two of them together.
117
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:56,859
He is a sexually complicated man.
But with a huge heart.
118
00:05:56,860 --> 00:05:59,299
- Right.
- A huge, broken, heart.
119
00:05:59,300 --> 00:06:01,659
- OK, Melody.
- Shattered.
120
00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:02,779
Bum out.
121
00:06:02,780 --> 00:06:06,339
No, no, look.
She has found love with Brian.
122
00:06:06,340 --> 00:06:07,939
I cannot begrudge her that.
123
00:06:07,940 --> 00:06:11,579
Your pain is so beautiful.
124
00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:12,819
Thank you.
125
00:06:12,820 --> 00:06:16,820
- Have you been in touch with Cara?
- Yes... She, uh... sent me a photo of her garden.
126
00:06:18,260 --> 00:06:19,379
Her front garden?
127
00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:22,219
No, although she does have
a lovely little front garden.
128
00:06:22,220 --> 00:06:24,819
But I only paid attention to
the back garden.
129
00:06:24,820 --> 00:06:27,179
More space for aggressive seeding
and such.
130
00:06:27,180 --> 00:06:30,019
It was rather a weekend
passion of mine.
131
00:06:30,020 --> 00:06:32,699
Can we see a picture of her
back garden?
132
00:06:32,700 --> 00:06:36,700
Of course.
If you like that sort of thing.
133
00:06:36,740 --> 00:06:38,539
Here are the lovely camellias.
134
00:06:38,540 --> 00:06:42,099
And you can just make out that
climbing rose blossoming
135
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:44,419
through the sweet peas.
- What's that?
136
00:06:44,420 --> 00:06:46,979
That's Brian jumping through
the sprinkler in front
137
00:06:46,980 --> 00:06:48,179
of the chrysanthemums.
138
00:06:48,180 --> 00:06:51,979
- He's very...
- Hairy, yes.
139
00:06:51,980 --> 00:06:55,980
I haven't that gift, I'm afraid.
140
00:06:56,980 --> 00:07:00,980
I think it's beautiful.
That you tried. She let you down.
141
00:07:02,220 --> 00:07:06,220
You held your end up. Good for you.
142
00:07:06,980 --> 00:07:10,739
Thank you, Sam.
143
00:07:10,740 --> 00:07:14,740
- Are you trying to have sex
with someone here? - No.
144
00:07:20,820 --> 00:07:22,059
UKULELE STRUMS
145
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:26,060
OK. It's Ukululu time.
We're going to play Truth Songs.
146
00:07:27,220 --> 00:07:28,659
So, fill your cups.
147
00:07:28,660 --> 00:07:30,819
It's time to
get to know each other properly
148
00:07:30,820 --> 00:07:33,779
and these are the only two ways
I know how to do it.
149
00:07:33,780 --> 00:07:36,179
I have work tomorrow.
Ah, we all do.
150
00:07:36,180 --> 00:07:37,899
- Well...
- What?
151
00:07:37,900 --> 00:07:39,459
You're a receptionist.
152
00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:40,819
And?
153
00:07:40,820 --> 00:07:44,820
Well...
154
00:07:46,220 --> 00:07:48,819
Sing one about this deliciously
spicy curry!
155
00:07:48,820 --> 00:07:52,099
OK.
156
00:07:52,100 --> 00:07:55,019
I really liked the curry
157
00:07:55,020 --> 00:07:58,699
Which is really lucky
158
00:07:58,700 --> 00:08:02,619
Cos Kate told us to big it up
whether we did or not.
159
00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:06,579
APPLAUSE
160
00:08:06,580 --> 00:08:08,179
Is that true?
161
00:08:08,180 --> 00:08:09,419
No.
162
00:08:09,420 --> 00:08:11,539
Yes. Who's next?!
163
00:08:11,540 --> 00:08:12,699
Kate do one!
164
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:13,819
Excellent idea!
165
00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:15,859
- Do one about...
- Nothing sexual, please.
166
00:08:15,860 --> 00:08:17,259
...orgasms!
167
00:08:17,260 --> 00:08:19,259
I'm not going to sing about orgasms!
168
00:08:19,260 --> 00:08:21,499
ALL: Come on!
169
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:25,500
UKULELE STRUMS
170
00:08:26,100 --> 00:08:30,100
They feel really nice
171
00:08:32,180 --> 00:08:36,180
They feel really nice
172
00:08:38,260 --> 00:08:42,260
I really like orgasms
173
00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:49,060
They happen down there.
174
00:08:55,380 --> 00:08:59,380
You nailed it, babe.
175
00:09:00,580 --> 00:09:03,699
I want to do one with Colin,
about love.
176
00:09:03,700 --> 00:09:07,700
Hold my hand.
177
00:09:09,540 --> 00:09:13,540
-
Oooooo
- Oooooo
178
00:09:14,580 --> 00:09:18,580
Why am I here?
179
00:09:20,700 --> 00:09:24,700
Most mornings I wish I was dead.
180
00:09:31,020 --> 00:09:34,939
Wow.
181
00:09:34,940 --> 00:09:36,299
Fucking amazing.
182
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:37,619
TIMER DINGS
183
00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:41,620
Second curry.
184
00:09:48,580 --> 00:09:49,699
What's that smell?
185
00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:51,059
It's the next curry.
186
00:09:51,060 --> 00:09:53,899
Ooh, lovely. Why did you tell
Lulu about my orgasm thing?
187
00:09:53,900 --> 00:09:56,779
I didn't. Why did you tell everyone
to pretend to like my meal?
188
00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:59,779
I didn't. Why did you tell
Lulu I've never jizzed?
189
00:09:59,780 --> 00:10:02,539
I didn't!
Baby, you can't say jizzed.
190
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:04,059
Well, she's fucking intuitive then,
191
00:10:04,060 --> 00:10:06,299
picking ME to sing the one
song about orgasms.
192
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:07,379
Lucky I pulled it off.
193
00:10:07,380 --> 00:10:08,979
Later. Please. This one is fish.
194
00:10:08,980 --> 00:10:10,379
It's all in the timing.
195
00:10:10,380 --> 00:10:12,059
Promise me she doesn't know.
196
00:10:12,060 --> 00:10:13,259
I promise.
197
00:10:13,260 --> 00:10:16,499
- Swear on our future children.
- I swear.
198
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:28,900
Kate can't co-me.
199
00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:32,899
I was singing about how...
200
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:36,019
how you can't come to the cinema
with Sam and Fred tomorrow.
201
00:10:36,020 --> 00:10:37,579
- Sure.
- Seriously, I didn't know.
202
00:10:37,580 --> 00:10:38,779
Seriously, it's OK.
203
00:10:38,780 --> 00:10:42,219
I didn't know. Anthony never tells me
anything any more. Seriously.
204
00:10:42,220 --> 00:10:46,220
I'm sorry.
205
00:10:48,020 --> 00:10:51,059
I don't want to talk about it.
206
00:10:51,060 --> 00:10:52,379
OK.
207
00:10:52,380 --> 00:10:54,539
I can get the ukulele
if you'd rather sing about it.
208
00:10:54,540 --> 00:10:58,540
- I could fucking murder you sometimes.
- Sorry.
209
00:10:59,020 --> 00:11:00,939
Hey, I'm a good listener, though.
210
00:11:00,940 --> 00:11:04,379
- I'm sure you...
- What?
211
00:11:04,380 --> 00:11:08,139
I just feel like everyone else can
jizz at the drop of a cock.
212
00:11:08,140 --> 00:11:09,499
Tell me about it.
213
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:11,299
You struggle as well?
214
00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:13,259
Oh, no, sorry.
I'm one of the lucky ones.
215
00:11:13,260 --> 00:11:15,579
I get close just
looking at The Shard.
216
00:11:15,580 --> 00:11:17,779
- Huh...
- DOOR BANGS
217
00:11:17,780 --> 00:11:19,379
Lulu, get out, come on.
218
00:11:19,380 --> 00:11:21,619
I can feel you ruining
my relationship from here.
219
00:11:21,620 --> 00:11:24,659
It's OK, baby. I know you didn't say
anything. We're just chatting.
220
00:11:24,660 --> 00:11:26,099
- About what?
- The Shard.
221
00:11:26,100 --> 00:11:28,259
- Get out of there!
- We're bonding!
222
00:11:28,260 --> 00:11:31,059
I'm serious! She's a teenage boy,
she has nothing to offer!
223
00:11:31,060 --> 00:11:33,139
It's OK, baby.
We'll be down in a minute.
224
00:11:33,140 --> 00:11:35,019
I know you didn't tell her anything.
225
00:11:35,020 --> 00:11:37,179
Yeah, well, I don't like it.
226
00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:40,019
Is it really gross for you
to talk about all this stuff?
227
00:11:40,020 --> 00:11:42,139
I know you two are like
siblings, right?
228
00:11:42,140 --> 00:11:46,019
- No, it's fine.
- Siblings... right?
229
00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:47,899
Yes.
230
00:11:47,900 --> 00:11:50,299
Look, the main thing about orgasms...
231
00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:53,259
Oh, fuck's sake. I HAVE jizzed.
232
00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:56,499
I've just never...
233
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:58,259
...with Anthony.
234
00:11:58,260 --> 00:12:00,499
- Ooh.
- Please don't tell him I told you.
235
00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:02,579
- Course.
- I don't want it to mean we're not happy.
236
00:12:02,580 --> 00:12:04,059
It doesn't.
237
00:12:04,060 --> 00:12:06,379
Happy people jizz.
238
00:12:06,380 --> 00:12:09,699
Everyone has a thing. You probably
just haven't found yours yet.
239
00:12:09,700 --> 00:12:12,299
You've got to keep experimenting.
Don't give up.
240
00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:14,899
SHE SLAPS HER THIGH
241
00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:16,779
Thanks.
242
00:12:16,780 --> 00:12:19,939
(I did actually come in here
because I need a poo.)
243
00:12:19,940 --> 00:12:23,940
Sure.
244
00:12:28,100 --> 00:12:29,619
Hey.
245
00:12:29,620 --> 00:12:30,859
What are you doing?
246
00:12:30,860 --> 00:12:32,539
Wow! Nothing.
247
00:12:32,540 --> 00:12:36,540
Come on. Tell me, like...
Why is this one not right for me?
248
00:12:36,660 --> 00:12:40,099
Too kind? Too successful?
249
00:12:40,100 --> 00:12:41,459
Too attractive?
250
00:12:41,460 --> 00:12:43,499
You've got a bogey.
251
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:47,500
I know that's not true.
252
00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,059
Fuck you.
253
00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:52,499
No, come on. Please, tell me.
254
00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:54,979
- I do think she's right for you.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
255
00:12:54,980 --> 00:12:56,259
Thanks.
256
00:12:56,260 --> 00:12:58,579
I'm just not sure
you're right for her.
257
00:12:58,580 --> 00:13:02,299
You don't even come together.
258
00:13:02,300 --> 00:13:06,300
I told you that in confidence.
259
00:13:06,500 --> 00:13:10,379
Aw, shit. Lulu...
260
00:13:10,380 --> 00:13:13,379
...I'm really fucking happy now.
261
00:13:13,380 --> 00:13:17,380
I don't think you are.
262
00:13:20,540 --> 00:13:23,059
Stop trying to fuck Sam.
263
00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:27,060
You're embarrassing yourself and
I don't want him to catch anything.
264
00:13:29,940 --> 00:13:33,379
Hey, guys. Sorry to interruptaroo.
265
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:37,380
You don't know where I can find a
little fella called Fred, do you?
266
00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:43,020
CHATTER
267
00:13:45,580 --> 00:13:46,939
TALK GROWS LOUDER
268
00:13:46,940 --> 00:13:50,099
- Go on!
- No, no way! No, I hardly know you guys.
269
00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:54,100
Look, if I can do a song, then you
can! It's rather liberating.
270
00:13:54,140 --> 00:13:57,539
Yeah, it doesn't matter if you can't sing,
it's not about that. It's about truth!
271
00:13:57,540 --> 00:14:00,419
Just fucking do it.
272
00:14:00,420 --> 00:14:03,339
Only if Fred gives me the topic.
273
00:14:03,340 --> 00:14:07,340
Ooh, me? Oh, I don't know...
I feel under pressure now.
274
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:09,259
- How about, um...
- Cock?
275
00:14:09,260 --> 00:14:10,579
Sam.
276
00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:12,619
How about... penguins?
277
00:14:12,620 --> 00:14:14,339
- Lovely!
278
00:14:14,340 --> 00:14:15,779
Excellent choice, Fred.
279
00:14:15,780 --> 00:14:19,780
Classic Fred.
280
00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:26,900
I'll sing you a song
about penguins and...
281
00:14:27,180 --> 00:14:28,859
Oh, oh, my God.
282
00:14:28,860 --> 00:14:31,939
Oh, no, no! It's good.
One more go, one more go.
283
00:14:31,940 --> 00:14:35,940
- Just do it again.
- All right, come on. With groove, groove it.
284
00:14:39,540 --> 00:14:43,540
And I wish that I could
sing about those penguins
285
00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:50,820
But all that I have
in my head, yeah
286
00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:56,899
Is a tune, a tune, a tune
287
00:14:56,900 --> 00:15:00,819
About the most beautiful
creature in the world
288
00:15:00,820 --> 00:15:03,899
So I guess I got to sing
289
00:15:03,900 --> 00:15:06,419
So I guess I got to sing
290
00:15:06,420 --> 00:15:10,419
I got to sing about Fred!
291
00:15:10,420 --> 00:15:14,420
CHEERING
292
00:15:18,020 --> 00:15:19,339
I want to do one.
293
00:15:19,340 --> 00:15:20,539
You can't beat that!
294
00:15:20,540 --> 00:15:23,179
I think I surprised
myself with that one!
295
00:15:23,180 --> 00:15:25,459
Oh-oh-oh-oh!
296
00:15:25,460 --> 00:15:28,499
I'm going to have to
strap you in, baby girl.
297
00:15:28,500 --> 00:15:30,819
TABLE SHAKES
Oh!
298
00:15:30,820 --> 00:15:34,379
Why am I the only ones drunk?
299
00:15:34,380 --> 00:15:38,099
Cos you drank everyone's wine.
300
00:15:38,100 --> 00:15:40,899
Sam, help me, would you?
301
00:15:40,900 --> 00:15:44,900
- Sam?
- Yeah.
302
00:15:45,380 --> 00:15:46,659
So, Lulu...
303
00:15:46,660 --> 00:15:49,299
- Pretty full-on, yeah.
- She's trying to piss me off.
304
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:51,299
She doesn't actually want
to have sex with you.
305
00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:54,499
- She does.
- She doesn't. Mmm. She does.
306
00:15:54,500 --> 00:15:56,539
She doesn't.
307
00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:58,739
- She does.
- I don't have time to do this.
308
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,299
She doesn't.
309
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:05,139
She doesn't.
310
00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:07,499
Can you carry those in?
311
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:11,500
So, just to be clear...
you still want to bang Lulu?
312
00:16:12,060 --> 00:16:14,259
No! No.
313
00:16:14,260 --> 00:16:16,539
OK, cool! So she's
not red zone any more?
314
00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:18,139
- Do what you want, man.
- Really?
315
00:16:18,140 --> 00:16:19,699
No!
316
00:16:19,700 --> 00:16:22,219
But, yeah, sure. But no.
317
00:16:22,220 --> 00:16:23,979
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
318
00:16:23,980 --> 00:16:27,859
No. Cool?
319
00:16:27,860 --> 00:16:29,139
Are you OK?
320
00:16:29,140 --> 00:16:30,819
No.
321
00:16:30,820 --> 00:16:34,659
That'll keep me busy for a couple
of weeks. And then... Colin?
322
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,819
I suppose a drop more can't hurt.
323
00:16:36,820 --> 00:16:40,739
Then I'm whisking Fred away
to this lovely little villa
324
00:16:40,740 --> 00:16:42,459
that I've got in Palma.
325
00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:43,939
- Aw, how romantic.
326
00:16:43,940 --> 00:16:45,619
Are we nearly finished?
327
00:16:45,620 --> 00:16:47,179
- Nope, no-one move.
328
00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:50,179
- Ow! Melody, Fred hit me!
- Fred, do it again.
329
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:52,459
Give me that.
I'm so sorry about this, Will.
330
00:16:52,460 --> 00:16:54,539
Don't make crazy Fred
come to town, OK?
331
00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:58,299
ALL: Oh!
332
00:16:58,300 --> 00:17:00,619
You have ruined the shirt!
333
00:17:00,620 --> 00:17:04,620
It was my shirt! I've ruined
MY shirt. And "crazy Fred"?
334
00:17:05,020 --> 00:17:06,379
Oh, you're adorable.
335
00:17:06,380 --> 00:17:08,619
Stop touching me. I'm not adorable.
336
00:17:08,620 --> 00:17:12,139
- I'm a man.
- All right, stop showing off, you little squid.
337
00:17:12,140 --> 00:17:13,539
I made you.
338
00:17:13,540 --> 00:17:16,179
Excuse me?
339
00:17:16,180 --> 00:17:18,259
Give me my shirt back.
340
00:17:18,260 --> 00:17:21,099
- What?
- I don't think that's necessary, is it?
341
00:17:21,100 --> 00:17:25,100
Now.
342
00:17:28,100 --> 00:17:31,339
All yours.
343
00:17:31,340 --> 00:17:32,939
OK...
344
00:17:32,940 --> 00:17:35,939
Now let's play...
345
00:17:35,940 --> 00:17:39,699
"who's going to have sex tonight?"
346
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:41,699
Melody and Colin!
347
00:17:41,700 --> 00:17:43,259
That is not what this is.
348
00:17:43,260 --> 00:17:47,139
Oh, come on. We've all seen
you sneaking out of Melody's room
349
00:17:47,140 --> 00:17:49,899
like a satisfied little squirrel.
350
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:52,019
- Come on, Colin.
- Aw, Lolita, don't run!
351
00:17:52,020 --> 00:17:54,139
Oh, God, I think I'll, erm...
352
00:17:54,140 --> 00:17:57,859
It's OK, Colin. You're going
through a big life change.
353
00:17:57,860 --> 00:18:00,499
You're bound to make
very odd decisions.
354
00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:02,059
I understand English, you know.
355
00:18:02,060 --> 00:18:03,459
Why is everyone freaking out?
356
00:18:03,460 --> 00:18:05,579
Zey are lovers. Let zem be!
357
00:18:05,580 --> 00:18:07,179
Is zat offensive, Anthony?
358
00:18:07,180 --> 00:18:09,099
He's not my lover!
359
00:18:09,100 --> 00:18:13,100
He's my muse!
360
00:18:18,060 --> 00:18:20,419
- Please excuse me.
361
00:18:20,420 --> 00:18:21,899
- Merci.
362
00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:23,939
- I warned you he was fragile.
- He's an adult.
363
00:18:23,940 --> 00:18:26,659
- Well, he just stormed off like a little baby.
- Your muse?!
364
00:18:26,660 --> 00:18:29,779
- Well, I think that's just lovely.
- Me, too. - No, you don't.
365
00:18:29,780 --> 00:18:31,779
Like an artist's muse?!
366
00:18:31,780 --> 00:18:33,939
- Just lovely.
- Yes, he is!
367
00:18:33,940 --> 00:18:37,419
You think meeting someone like Colin
happens to artists all the time?!
368
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:38,899
He gives SO much.
369
00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:42,539
Yeah, sure, and you just lap it up
and just slap it on a canvas.
370
00:18:42,540 --> 00:18:43,619
Pardon?
371
00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:47,620
"His pain is so beautiful."
You're using him to indulge yourself.
372
00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:50,939
I am indulging. And what is this?
373
00:18:50,940 --> 00:18:53,219
That is a?4 bottle of wine.
374
00:18:53,220 --> 00:18:54,739
COMMOTION
375
00:18:54,740 --> 00:18:56,899
What did I just say?!
That's expensive!
376
00:18:56,900 --> 00:18:58,859
Can we all grow up
for a second here, please?
377
00:18:58,860 --> 00:19:01,499
- I can't believe you can't come.
- Sorry if I upset you, Melody.
378
00:19:01,500 --> 00:19:03,579
You don't upset me. You bore me.
379
00:19:03,580 --> 00:19:07,580
All you seem to want to do is drink
and wank and drink and wank.
380
00:19:07,660 --> 00:19:11,099
Well, at least I don't have to wank
other people's pain onto a canvas,
381
00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:14,339
and then shove it in people's
faces and call it "my art."
382
00:19:14,340 --> 00:19:16,739
Well, at least I don't have
to stare at other people's
383
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:19,179
miserable, naked bodies
to make me feel something.
384
00:19:19,180 --> 00:19:20,379
This is so hot.
385
00:19:20,380 --> 00:19:22,659
Isn't that exactly what
you're doing with Colin?
386
00:19:22,660 --> 00:19:24,819
I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
should I call him your muse?
387
00:19:24,820 --> 00:19:27,099
Maybe Kate should try
staring at a naked Colin
388
00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:28,619
to help her orgasm debut.
389
00:19:28,620 --> 00:19:30,059
I have had an orgasm!
390
00:19:30,060 --> 00:19:32,419
You are all obsessed with sex!
391
00:19:32,420 --> 00:19:35,579
- Don't walk out on this, this is
the big one, this is the curr-icane!
392
00:19:35,580 --> 00:19:38,019
I can't bear it, mate.
I'm going to have to make her come.
393
00:19:38,020 --> 00:19:39,499
I have had an orgasm!
394
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:43,500
This is a very delicate mix of three
very unusual, sought-after spices.
395
00:19:43,620 --> 00:19:46,819
This is the first time I've managed
to make it. Three days to marinate.
396
00:19:46,820 --> 00:19:50,459
- What does it feel like, then?
- Oh, leave her alone. - Can we focus on the curries, please?
397
00:19:50,460 --> 00:19:53,179
- You blatantly haven't.
- She has! - I have had an orgasm!
398
00:19:53,180 --> 00:19:57,180
She's just never
orgasmed with Anthony!
399
00:19:59,220 --> 00:20:03,220
Can we drop... the wind-ups...
for a second, Lu?!
400
00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:14,899
OK...
401
00:20:14,900 --> 00:20:18,900
I am just going to gather up
all of this negative energy
402
00:20:19,860 --> 00:20:22,699
and I'm just going to
pop it in here, OK?
403
00:20:22,700 --> 00:20:26,700
Don't put it in there.
I've spent three days marinating!
404
00:20:32,340 --> 00:20:35,619
- No!
- Oh, God, it's delicious, it's delicious.
405
00:20:35,620 --> 00:20:38,859
- Come on, baby, let's go to bed.
- Try. - Anthony.
406
00:20:38,860 --> 00:20:40,419
- Fuck!
- I'll do it, I'll do it!
407
00:20:40,420 --> 00:20:42,339
Aww. Our first fight.
408
00:20:42,340 --> 00:20:46,340
G'day. I'm going to go and get
you a big pint of water, OK?
409
00:20:46,580 --> 00:20:49,539
Fred, have you got some cups
and some cloths?
410
00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:53,540
Yes. Sure. This way.
411
00:20:54,260 --> 00:20:56,459
Your friends are lunatics.
412
00:20:56,460 --> 00:20:58,579
I know.
413
00:20:58,580 --> 00:20:59,779
Ugh!
414
00:20:59,780 --> 00:21:03,780
SHE GROANS
415
00:21:05,300 --> 00:21:07,179
Oooh...
416
00:21:07,180 --> 00:21:08,499
Hey.
417
00:21:08,500 --> 00:21:10,579
Ooh.
418
00:21:10,580 --> 00:21:11,859
Hey, hey, hey.
419
00:21:11,860 --> 00:21:14,579
It's tempting, Chuckles,
but I'm too full.
420
00:21:14,580 --> 00:21:16,459
Aw, come on. Get your tits out.
421
00:21:16,460 --> 00:21:18,739
We can't.
422
00:21:18,740 --> 00:21:21,019
Sorry.
423
00:21:21,020 --> 00:21:22,899
No!
424
00:21:22,900 --> 00:21:26,419
I'll let you call me Fred!
425
00:21:26,420 --> 00:21:30,420
That was a joke.
426
00:21:42,860 --> 00:21:44,379
I thought you left.
427
00:21:44,380 --> 00:21:45,699
So did I.
428
00:21:45,700 --> 00:21:48,539
- You don't have to be here
if you can't handle... - No.
429
00:21:48,540 --> 00:21:52,540
I want to be here.
430
00:21:54,700 --> 00:21:57,739
I want to be the pain
in your paintings...
431
00:21:57,740 --> 00:22:01,740
so to speak.
432
00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:12,260
Merci, Colin.
433
00:22:16,900 --> 00:22:18,179
Yup.
434
00:22:18,180 --> 00:22:19,819
That's OK.
435
00:22:19,820 --> 00:22:23,259
Yup. Yup.
436
00:22:23,260 --> 00:22:24,859
This is humiliating.
437
00:22:24,860 --> 00:22:28,860
No, baby, it's not. We've just
got to find our... thing.
438
00:22:29,860 --> 00:22:32,659
- HE SNIFFS
- I'm sorry.
439
00:22:32,660 --> 00:22:35,219
I don't want to... Whoo!
440
00:22:35,220 --> 00:22:37,299
...cry in front of you, but...
441
00:22:37,300 --> 00:22:40,219
No, no... That's fine.
442
00:22:40,220 --> 00:22:43,019
Maybe we're just going to have
to admit that we're not...
443
00:22:43,020 --> 00:22:45,859
Keep crying. Don't stop crying...
444
00:22:45,860 --> 00:22:47,819
...compatible...
- Yeah!
445
00:22:47,820 --> 00:22:51,820
- Keep going.
- ..together. - Think about how sad that makes you.
446
00:22:52,020 --> 00:22:53,979
- Keep crying!
- HE SOBS
447
00:22:53,980 --> 00:22:56,219
Cry! Cry!
448
00:22:56,220 --> 00:22:58,739
Oh, yeah! Please, cry!
449
00:22:58,740 --> 00:23:00,419
Oh, you're sad! Yeah!
450
00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:04,420
Ugh! UGH!
451
00:23:08,580 --> 00:23:12,580
- Did you...?
- Yep.
452
00:23:13,100 --> 00:23:16,580
Yeah, I did.
453
00:23:16,630 --> 00:23:21,180
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