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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,793 --> 00:00:04,379 -Previously on Ally McBeal. -I'm really a man. 2 00:00:04,462 --> 00:00:08,466 I shouldn't be hitting on you, but you're just so cute. 3 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:11,261 And what can I say? I'm a man. 4 00:00:11,344 --> 00:00:13,555 I gave you my word I wouldn't tell. I'll honor that. 5 00:00:13,638 --> 00:00:15,181 But Mark's a friend. 6 00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:16,391 It's difficult to sit back and watch him get hurt. 7 00:00:16,474 --> 00:00:18,727 What makes you so damn sure he'll get hurt? 8 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:21,855 The truth is I like a girl with a secret or two. 9 00:00:21,938 --> 00:00:25,191 Hmm. You're gonna love me. 10 00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:30,822 [Ally Narrating] It all started with his smile. 11 00:00:30,905 --> 00:00:32,490 Now I've heard it said 12 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:34,325 when you trace the origin of trouble, 13 00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:37,203 more times than not, it can lead to a smile. 14 00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:38,663 Okay, well, I need you 15 00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:40,248 to, uh, sign there. Sign there. 16 00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:41,332 [Ally Narrating] We were just dotting 17 00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:42,834 the "I's" on a settlement. 18 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:45,795 The case was over. And he seemed so happy. 19 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,547 May I? 20 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:50,050 Which is unusual for a lawyer, 21 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:53,136 if not illegal. 22 00:00:53,219 --> 00:00:57,348 -Can I ask you something? -Sure. 23 00:00:57,432 --> 00:01:01,061 You have a smile that seems to embrace life. 24 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:04,355 Now, either you never married or you beat cancer. 25 00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:07,400 Uh, well, I did marry, but she died. 26 00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:10,737 -Oh. -Of cancer. 27 00:01:10,820 --> 00:01:13,490 -I am so sorry. -[Chuckles] 28 00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,200 Nah, it's all right. 29 00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:18,203 But I will accept the compliment on my smile. 30 00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:20,038 How do you do it, really? 31 00:01:20,121 --> 00:01:22,165 -Do what? -Smile like that. 32 00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:24,042 So genuine, 33 00:01:24,125 --> 00:01:27,128 so like everything's gonna be okay. 34 00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:31,299 Well, I close my eyes, 35 00:01:31,382 --> 00:01:35,804 and I say to myself aloud, but in a very low voice, 36 00:01:37,305 --> 00:01:41,392 "Everything's going to be okay." 37 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,812 [Ally Narrating] I'm not sure why, 38 00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:46,856 but I wanted some of what he had inside him. 39 00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,483 And then it just happened. 40 00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,984 Would you like to get dinner? 41 00:01:50,068 --> 00:01:51,486 Sure. 42 00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:53,696 I accepted my very first date... 43 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,574 with an... old person. 44 00:01:57,867 --> 00:01:59,786 {\an8}♪ I've been down down, down ♪ 45 00:01:59,869 --> 00:02:03,289 {\an8}♪ I've been down this road ♪ 46 00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:07,627 {\an8}♪ Walkin' the line that's painted by pride ♪ 47 00:02:07,710 --> 00:02:10,588 {\an8}♪ And I have made mistakes in my life ♪ 48 00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:14,884 {\an8}♪ That I just can't hide ♪ 49 00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:17,971 {\an8}♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪ 50 00:02:18,054 --> 00:02:21,975 {\an8}♪ For what love has to bring Yeah ♪ 51 00:02:22,058 --> 00:02:26,146 {\an8}♪ I got myself together, yeah ♪ 52 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:30,024 {\an8}♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪ 53 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:33,695 {\an8}♪ I've been searching my soul tonight ♪ 54 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:37,407 {\an8}♪ I know there's so much more to life ♪ 55 00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:40,410 {\an8}♪ Now I know I can shine a light ♪ 56 00:02:40,493 --> 00:02:43,163 {\an8}♪ To find my way back home ♪ 57 00:02:43,246 --> 00:02:45,665 {\an8}-♪ Oh ♪ -♪ Hoo, hoo ♪ 58 00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:48,668 {\an8}♪ Baby, yeah ♪ 59 00:02:48,751 --> 00:02:52,463 {\an8}-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪ -♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪ 60 00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:07,187 {\an8}[Ally Narrating] They say that after breaking up 61 00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:09,522 {\an8}with somebody, a woman will date anybody. 62 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:12,108 {\an8}They also say that men can pick up on that. 63 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,485 {\an8}[Growls] Sorry. 64 00:03:14,569 --> 00:03:17,030 {\an8}It's okay. Do you wanna catch a movie? 65 00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:18,865 {\an8}[Ally Narrating] I'm in my 30s. It's no big deal, really, 66 00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:21,701 {\an8}going out with a guy in his 50s. 67 00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:23,536 {\an8}What's so disconcerting... 68 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,705 {\an8}was getting that little intuitive pang inside... 69 00:03:25,788 --> 00:03:28,291 that says it could be something serious. 70 00:03:28,374 --> 00:03:31,127 That inner voice that screams out, 71 00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:33,922 "Buy a new dress." 72 00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:36,382 How could she cause the breakup? 73 00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:38,384 Because I followed her advice. 74 00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:40,386 {\an8}I did everything she told me to, 75 00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,597 {\an8}only to have my husband walk out on me for good. 76 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:47,060 {\an8}Nelle, this is Wanda Spickett. She's the one suing the doctor. 77 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,561 {\an8}Oh, doctor, yeah. 78 00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:49,896 {\an8}You know, I doubt she's even a real doctor. 79 00:03:49,979 --> 00:03:51,481 {\an8}That woman has no business giving people 80 00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:52,649 {\an8}advice on how to save their marriages. 81 00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:54,150 {\an8}-I'll tell ya. -Whoa, whoa, whoa. 82 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,860 {\an8}You took this woman's seminar. 83 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,278 {\an8}More like a workshop, really. 84 00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:58,821 {\an8}You know, it's "How to Satisfy Your Man." 85 00:03:58,905 --> 00:03:59,739 {\an8}She has 'em every month. 86 00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:01,866 {\an8}She's starting a new one tomorrow. 87 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:03,326 {\an8}I have half a mind to go down there 88 00:04:03,409 --> 00:04:05,036 {\an8}and tell her students what a fraud she is. 89 00:04:05,119 --> 00:04:08,331 {\an8}Okay. And based on this doctor's advice-- 90 00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,625 {\an8}I did what she said. 91 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:12,627 {\an8}My husband dumped me like toxic waste. 92 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,546 {\an8}What was her advice? 93 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:17,173 {\an8}Well, basically, 94 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,384 {\an8}that the woman should make sacrifices. 95 00:04:19,467 --> 00:04:20,927 {\an8}You know, we should be submissive. 96 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,220 {\an8}You know, like Baptists. 97 00:04:22,303 --> 00:04:24,097 {\an8}And when he comes home from work, 98 00:04:24,180 --> 00:04:25,556 {\an8}we should greet him at the door with slippers, 99 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,558 {\an8}a three-course meal and fellatio. 100 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:29,686 [Laughs] Fellatio. Ha! 101 00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:31,020 You know what my husband said to me? 102 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,022 He said getting oral sex from me... 103 00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:35,191 was like walking on a high wire. 104 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,360 In either case, you don't wanna be looking down. 105 00:04:37,443 --> 00:04:39,737 This woman is my doctor. 106 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:41,239 -I think that she-- -Whoa! Whoa. Whoa. 107 00:04:41,322 --> 00:04:43,157 Are you sure he didn't leave you just for being unattractive? 108 00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:50,039 It was the putrid advice I got from that guru. 109 00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:52,667 I want to sue her. 110 00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,423 {\an8}[Mumbling] 111 00:04:58,506 --> 00:04:59,549 {\an8}Ally, how long have you known me? Seven, eight years? 112 00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:01,884 {\an8}[Mumbling] About. 113 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,386 {\an8}And in that time, 114 00:05:03,469 --> 00:05:05,013 {\an8}have you ever known me to be morally conflicted? 115 00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,472 {\an8}Never. 116 00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:07,724 {\an8}So you'll understand how I need your help here. 117 00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,225 {\an8}What's your crisis, Richard? 118 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,560 {\an8}Well, uh, Mark. 119 00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:12,395 {\an8}I like Mark, as I'm sure you do. 120 00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,605 {\an8}I want him to be happy. 121 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:16,399 He's dating a woman. 122 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:18,526 She's got so many nice qualities, 123 00:05:18,609 --> 00:05:21,279 but one of them is a--a penis. 124 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,076 Ally? Are you there? 125 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,579 Did you just say that she has a penis? 126 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:33,708 Yes. That's not my problem, though it's certainly his. 127 00:05:33,791 --> 00:05:36,711 My conflict is, should I tell? 128 00:05:36,794 --> 00:05:39,547 See, I learned this through a privileged communication. 129 00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:41,799 Even though privilege runs to the other lawyers 130 00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,718 in this firm, she forbade me from telling him. 131 00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:45,845 And yet--Ally, he's falling in love with her. 132 00:05:45,928 --> 00:05:47,513 I mean, I can see it. 133 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:48,973 Don't I have some duty? Shouldn't I slip him a note? 134 00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:51,434 Mayday? Something? 135 00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:54,354 The woman Mark is dating has a penis? 136 00:05:54,437 --> 00:05:57,440 Yes. It's not right. 137 00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:01,277 [Ally Narrating] Ordinarily, one would think 138 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,779 Mark Albert would win the contest... 139 00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,864 for having the biggest problem, 140 00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:08,826 even though he has yet to discover it. 141 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,288 But these aren't ordinary times. 142 00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:18,878 Um, there must be some mistake. 143 00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:23,007 Hmm. Well, this is your table, sir. 144 00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,717 [Ally Narrating] It's always the case. 145 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,928 As soon as you meet one man, they all come out. 146 00:06:27,011 --> 00:06:28,763 Look at this guy. He's perfect. 147 00:06:28,846 --> 00:06:30,306 Do you have another table? 148 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,016 And I'm on a date, so I can't have him. 149 00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:35,186 We have a table in the back. This way, please. 150 00:06:35,269 --> 00:06:38,272 -Sorry to disturb you. -It's okay. 151 00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:42,068 This is the thing about dating somebody older. 152 00:06:42,151 --> 00:06:43,486 Young, beautiful things... 153 00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,405 get dangled in front of you all day. 154 00:06:47,698 --> 00:06:51,369 Ally. [Chuckles] I'm sorry I'm late. 155 00:06:51,452 --> 00:06:52,537 It's okay. 156 00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:54,831 I was in court in front of Judge Swackheim, 157 00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:56,874 who actually threatened us with contempt 158 00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,876 if we didn't complete our pretrial memos. 159 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,379 It's an environmental pro bono case, 160 00:07:01,462 --> 00:07:02,964 and it's killin' me. 161 00:07:03,047 --> 00:07:05,216 The environment is your client? 162 00:07:05,299 --> 00:07:07,009 Funny. 163 00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:10,513 It is a nonprofit organization. I'm a softy for clean air. 164 00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:12,974 [Thinking] I've been so wanting to meet a guy 165 00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:15,226 where everything's not about money. 166 00:07:15,309 --> 00:07:17,478 Could we have a bottle of Cristal, please? 167 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,896 [Man] Right away, sir. 168 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,398 [Thinking] And who's got plenty of it. 169 00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:23,526 [Ally Narrating] The truth is the conversation 170 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,319 struggled for a while. 171 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:28,531 We both loved movies, but different ones. 172 00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,033 We both liked sports, but different ones. 173 00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:33,453 We both were afraid of George Bush, 174 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:35,538 but different ones. 175 00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:37,290 It wasn't until the end of the dinner 176 00:07:37,373 --> 00:07:40,042 that we truly connected on one common interest-- 177 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,753 one thing we were both rather passionate about-- 178 00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:46,883 the one thing that can truly alter a person's life-- 179 00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:49,385 [No Audible Dialogue] 180 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,887 ♪ Please don't talk about love tonight ♪ 181 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,763 [Ally Narrating] Disco. 182 00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:55,808 For a single guy in the '70s, disco was the way to meet women. 183 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:58,019 For a little girl in her preteens, 184 00:07:58,102 --> 00:08:00,563 the outfits made for the best Halloween costumes. 185 00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:04,192 ♪ All the trouble that we've been through ♪ 186 00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:08,321 ♪ Please don't talk about the plans we had ♪ 187 00:08:08,404 --> 00:08:11,073 ♪ For fixin' this broken romance ♪ 188 00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:13,159 Elaine, can I steal you a second? It's important. 189 00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:14,952 Okay. 190 00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:19,582 ♪ I want action I want to live ♪ 191 00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:23,336 ♪ Action I got so much to give ♪ 192 00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:27,048 ♪ I'm wanna give it I'm wanna get some too ♪ 193 00:08:27,131 --> 00:08:30,760 ♪♪ [Vocalizing] 194 00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:34,889 ♪ I love the nightlife I got to boogie ♪ 195 00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:38,100 ♪ On the disco round, yeah ♪ 196 00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:41,938 And, uh, we're suing this guru for causing the breakup. 197 00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:43,773 It sounds like a tough case to me. 198 00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,441 Yeah, it is. 199 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,151 It so happens she's, uh, 200 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:49,195 starting another one of these workshops tomorrow. 201 00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:55,284 -I want you to enroll. -What? 202 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:56,953 Well, we've gotta get an inside peek 203 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,871 at what this seminar's like, the things she teaches. 204 00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:01,499 -Why don't you enroll? -Elaine, if I showed up... 205 00:09:01,582 --> 00:09:03,292 saying it was hard for me to hold onto a man, 206 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:06,462 don't you think she's be a tad suspicious? 207 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:09,549 Let me put it another way. 208 00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:10,633 I'm the attorney. 209 00:09:10,716 --> 00:09:13,052 I can't also be a potential witness. 210 00:09:13,135 --> 00:09:16,764 Look, all you have to do is go and listen and take notes. 211 00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:23,187 Please? 212 00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:25,231 All right. 213 00:09:25,314 --> 00:09:28,192 ♪ I wanna give it I wanna get some too ♪ 214 00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:32,488 -Thank you. -♪ Oh, oh ♪ 215 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,825 ♪ I love the nightlife I gotta boogie ♪ 216 00:09:35,908 --> 00:09:37,702 Who's that old thing with Ally? 217 00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,454 ♪ On the disco round, yeah ♪♪ 218 00:09:40,538 --> 00:09:42,039 [Ally Narrating] It started with disco. 219 00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,624 But as the night went on, 220 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,710 we could suddenly talk about everything. 221 00:09:45,793 --> 00:09:47,461 I really started to believe 222 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:48,879 that a 30-year-old woman has more in common... 223 00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:52,049 with a 50-year-old man than a guy her own age. 224 00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:57,305 Of course, it still seemed like hard bodies were now everywhere, 225 00:09:57,388 --> 00:09:59,807 though it was probably my imagination. 226 00:09:59,890 --> 00:10:03,311 I only started dating a year ago. 227 00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,813 After nine years of being single? 228 00:10:05,896 --> 00:10:07,982 The kids have only been out of the house for five. 229 00:10:08,065 --> 00:10:11,152 Plus, do you know how terrifying dating can be? 230 00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:13,070 -Uh, no. Tell me about it. -[Laughs] 231 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:15,531 Not to mention painful. Now, when you're younger, 232 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,617 at the end of the day you have all this energy. 233 00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:20,995 When you get older and tired-- 234 00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:22,288 Well, older, you know, 235 00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:24,040 has its advantages, if you ask me. 236 00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:27,209 -Mmm? -Younger guys, they, um-- 237 00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,503 -They only want one thing. -Mmm. 238 00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:31,088 You know what? As a man 239 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:32,673 who used to be younger, I take offense to that. 240 00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:35,259 Oh. Mm-hmm. 241 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,470 You know, I just keep thinking about your smile. 242 00:10:37,553 --> 00:10:40,473 I don't know why a smile should fascinate me. 243 00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:42,683 [Thinking] Maybe because I don't remember how to. 244 00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:46,520 Well, you know, most lawyers hate what they do, Ally. 245 00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,189 And people generally 246 00:10:48,272 --> 00:10:50,191 feel what they do is what they are. 247 00:10:50,274 --> 00:10:53,194 It naturally follows that they end up hating themselves. 248 00:10:53,277 --> 00:10:56,530 Now, I get up in the morning, I watch what I eat... 249 00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:59,116 and I watch what I do. 250 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,534 [Ally Narrating] It was one of those 251 00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,703 almost perfect fall nights. 252 00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:06,540 I should've known I was in for something unexpected. 253 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:08,292 [Vonda] ♪ That boy ♪ 254 00:11:08,376 --> 00:11:11,003 [Ally Narrating] Speaking of which. 255 00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:17,343 ♪ Isn't good for you ♪ 256 00:11:17,426 --> 00:11:19,887 -Mark. -Yeah? 257 00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:23,015 ♪ And this boy ♪ 258 00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:25,893 ♪ Won't be happy ♪ 259 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,728 I am-- 260 00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:31,440 ♪ Until he's seen you cry ♪ 261 00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:34,735 You're such a great guy. I just want you to know that. 262 00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:37,655 -You seem scared. -[Chuckles] 263 00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:39,824 No. I'm apprehensive, maybe. 264 00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:43,369 I've just had some relationships end abruptly. 265 00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:46,038 I'm not going anywhere. 266 00:11:46,122 --> 00:11:48,833 Promise? 267 00:11:48,916 --> 00:11:50,835 I promise. 268 00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:52,837 ♪ And, oh ♪ 269 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:56,841 ♪ And this boy ♪ 270 00:11:56,924 --> 00:12:00,219 ♪ Would be happy ♪ 271 00:12:01,470 --> 00:12:03,889 -♪ Just to love you ♪ -Richard. 272 00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,891 It's not right. [Mumbling] 273 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:09,061 You will keep your mouth quiet. 274 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:11,731 ♪ That boy ♪ 275 00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:15,818 ♪ Won't be happy ♪ 276 00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:19,363 ♪ Until he's seen ♪ 277 00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:23,659 ♪ You cry ♪♪ 278 00:12:31,041 --> 00:12:32,710 Aren't you afraid of giving him a heart attack? 279 00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:34,420 He is in good shape, Renee. 280 00:12:34,503 --> 00:12:36,213 Mid-50s is not that old. 281 00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:37,715 Who are you kidding? He's a fossil. 282 00:12:37,798 --> 00:12:39,925 -[Sighs] -I like older men. 283 00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:41,385 It's not until their peter peters 284 00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:43,012 that you can actually have a conversation. 285 00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:45,014 -He's not fat, is he? -Mmm. 286 00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:46,140 I had an old guy have a heart attack 287 00:12:46,223 --> 00:12:48,476 on me in bed once. It was awful. 288 00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:50,811 I just thought I was really good. Who knew he was dying? 289 00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:54,064 Can you imagine dying that way? 290 00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:58,110 Naked, your thingy all out and messy. Yuck. 291 00:12:58,194 --> 00:12:59,653 He's in good health. 292 00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:02,823 And I haven't even kissed him, by the way and-- 293 00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:04,575 I think that these slumber parties 294 00:13:04,658 --> 00:13:06,202 have cheered me up enough. 295 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,244 We don't need to keep having them once a week. 296 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:08,662 I have to get going anyway. 297 00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:11,332 My classes start today. "How to Satisfy a Man." 298 00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:13,459 By the way, enrollees can bring guests 299 00:13:13,542 --> 00:13:15,795 for the first class, so you might as well come. 300 00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:18,005 -Wh-What is this? -Uh, it's for a case. 301 00:13:18,088 --> 00:13:19,590 Some alleged doctor is teaching a course 302 00:13:19,673 --> 00:13:21,300 on how to keep a man happy. 303 00:13:21,383 --> 00:13:24,094 How about how to keep a man? Period. 304 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:26,096 Speak for yourself. 305 00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:29,850 [Chuckles] That's right. You have your Richard. 306 00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:32,770 Tell me, Ling. What's your secret? 307 00:13:32,853 --> 00:13:36,023 I have my secrets, thank you very much. 308 00:13:36,106 --> 00:13:38,442 -Oh, please. -I do. 309 00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:40,653 Oh, well, then tell us, Ling! 310 00:13:40,736 --> 00:13:43,823 Please? Give us poor, poor girls some help. 311 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,324 Do tell. 312 00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,201 Well, there are no general rules, 313 00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:49,870 which is why I have a problem with this doctor seminar thing. 314 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:53,165 Every trick is man specific. With Richard, well, you-- 315 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,627 I'm not gonna tell you. 316 00:13:56,710 --> 00:13:58,462 -Oh, come on! -Just tell us, Ling. 317 00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:02,007 All right. Between us. It never leaves this room. 318 00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:07,346 -Okay. -I take a little adhesive. 319 00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,473 I tape hundred dollar bills to my privates, 320 00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:11,308 wear them all day long. 321 00:14:11,392 --> 00:14:14,436 Nighttime, I get into bed. I'm beautiful, naked, 322 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,856 smell like money. 323 00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:19,024 It drives him wild. 324 00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,821 Oh, wow. 325 00:14:23,904 --> 00:14:25,823 [Elevator Bell Dings] 326 00:14:28,784 --> 00:14:31,161 Mark. Hey. 327 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:33,163 -How's it going? -Fine. 328 00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:36,584 Great. So, you and, uh, Cindy-- 329 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,420 Thing's going okay there? 330 00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:40,671 Richard, why are you taking such a keen interest 331 00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,173 in my relationship with Cindy? 332 00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:46,343 Well, Mark, to be completely honest, 333 00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:48,846 which you know I'm not comfortable, uh, being, 334 00:14:48,929 --> 00:14:51,891 uh, Cindy-- [Sighs] 335 00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:55,352 -You want her for yourself? -Mmm. [Coughing] 336 00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:58,939 -Richard. Are you okay? -[Groans] 337 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,983 I'm fine. Fine, fine, fine. 338 00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:03,319 No, it's just the thought of something wrong... 339 00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:05,404 going down the windpipe. 340 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:09,074 The thing is, I feel you met Cindy as a result of me. 341 00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:11,285 And, uh, well, as Cupid, 342 00:15:11,368 --> 00:15:13,370 you know, it was my arrow that it kinda-- 343 00:15:14,955 --> 00:15:18,292 Mark, Cindy-- She has an arrow. 344 00:15:18,375 --> 00:15:21,211 What are you talking about? 345 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:24,256 Uh--Ally, uh, wait. Excuse me. 346 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,219 Have you given any more thought to my conflict? 347 00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:33,474 I don't think you should tell him. 348 00:15:33,557 --> 00:15:35,559 What? Ally, he's falling in love with her. 349 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,394 Maybe he'll be open-minded about it. 350 00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,605 Guys can be a lot more accepting than you know 351 00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:41,231 when it comes to women they love. 352 00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:43,609 Have you ever known one to accept a--a penis? 353 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,279 -Richard-- -[Knocking] 354 00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:50,616 John. John. John, I-- I need your input. 355 00:15:50,699 --> 00:15:52,076 -Richard! -No, no, no, no! 356 00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:53,744 Up till now I've been asking women. 357 00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:56,080 I want to consult with a man. 358 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:59,583 Now, John, this is an absolute secret. You cannot repeat it. 359 00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:01,377 But I need your advice, because this-- 360 00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,629 this came close to keeping me awake last night. 361 00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:06,006 -Richard. -N-No. Cindy. 362 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:06,840 You've seen her, right? 363 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:09,093 -Quite fetching. -Well, uh, Cindy 364 00:16:09,176 --> 00:16:11,762 has a secret, which I know and Mark doesn't. 365 00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:14,264 The issue is, do I tell? 366 00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:18,102 -Is it material? -Extremely. She has a penis. 367 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:26,318 [Nose Whistles] 368 00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:28,779 [Ally Narrating] I think all men are homophobes. 369 00:16:28,862 --> 00:16:30,656 The bigots consider gayness a disease. 370 00:16:30,739 --> 00:16:33,075 The more enlightened ones don't-- 371 00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,952 only because they're afraid of catching it. 372 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:37,746 -Sorry. -[Laughs] 373 00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:40,541 No. No, that was--It was my fault. I was--I was-- 374 00:16:40,624 --> 00:16:42,876 You were the one at my table last night. 375 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:45,796 Oh. Oh, that-- that was your table? 376 00:16:45,879 --> 00:16:48,090 [Thinking] Then why didn't you sit down? 377 00:16:48,173 --> 00:16:52,011 Well, no. There was a mix-up. Um, are you eating there again? 378 00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:54,680 Uh, no. No, no, no. I'm-I'm-I'm-- 379 00:16:54,763 --> 00:16:57,850 I'm gonna go upstairs to an office. 380 00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,562 Well, it's nice to see you again. 381 00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:03,063 You too. 382 00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:07,651 Excuse me. 383 00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:11,363 I'm--I'm sorry, but I-- I kind of believe in fate. 384 00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,532 And, well, the combination of fate 385 00:17:13,615 --> 00:17:15,701 and no wedding ring on your finger-- 386 00:17:15,784 --> 00:17:18,996 Um--Would you like to get dinner? 387 00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:21,248 [Ally Narrating] The one thing I don't do is juggle. 388 00:17:21,331 --> 00:17:23,250 It's what I despise most about dating. 389 00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:26,336 -I'd love to. -I'm Jonathan. 390 00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:28,547 Ally, uh, McBeal. 391 00:17:28,630 --> 00:17:31,508 I work at Cage & Fish, so you can call me there. 392 00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,510 A lawyer? Great. 393 00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:35,721 Why? You have something against lawyers? 394 00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:38,307 Uh, everything. I am one. 395 00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:41,351 Ah. 396 00:17:41,435 --> 00:17:42,853 Well, maybe we can spend dinner 397 00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:45,272 overcoming negative first impressions. 398 00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:46,899 Yeah. 399 00:17:58,994 --> 00:18:00,329 [Ally Narrating] I spent the entire lunch 400 00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:02,081 pretending to listen to Michael, 401 00:18:02,164 --> 00:18:05,751 while I was really thinking about Jonathan. 402 00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:08,337 I have this really weird habit. 403 00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:12,758 Whenever I think about sex, I use my napkin a lot. 404 00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:15,260 Maybe because it's messy. 405 00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:17,554 I wasn't any less interested in Michael, 406 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:19,264 to be honest. I liked both of them. 407 00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,350 Oh, I hope he's talking about something 408 00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:23,435 I should be smiling about. 409 00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:25,562 Oh, men try to be funny on dates, 410 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,106 so every minute and a half, 411 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:29,858 I just take a shot and laugh a little. 412 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:33,070 I can still smell Jonathan. 413 00:18:33,153 --> 00:18:36,031 So she said good-bye to the family and, uh, 414 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,158 she passed away. 415 00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:41,245 [Chuckles] That's cute. 416 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,379 The thing about men, 417 00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:52,798 they start life nursing from their mothers. 418 00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:55,342 As little boys, they're pampered. 419 00:18:55,425 --> 00:18:57,469 And it's that pampering they still crave, 420 00:18:57,553 --> 00:18:58,804 even as adults. 421 00:18:58,887 --> 00:19:00,514 Should we write this down? 422 00:19:00,597 --> 00:19:01,473 We talk about all the progress-- 423 00:19:01,557 --> 00:19:03,433 -I'm taping it. -Shh. 424 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:06,478 Well, in the workplace, that may be true. 425 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:10,440 But in the home, we have never had a higher rate of failure. 426 00:19:10,524 --> 00:19:13,652 That's because women today want careers. 427 00:19:13,735 --> 00:19:17,156 And even the women who don't work want autonomy. 428 00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:20,284 What the man wants at home is a support system. 429 00:19:20,367 --> 00:19:23,495 Men get beaten up out there by their bosses-- 430 00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,747 by their competitors, by their colleagues. 431 00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:30,169 They have wounds, inside and out. 432 00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:35,090 ♪ When he opens the door ♪ 433 00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,467 ♪ Says, I'm home ♪ 434 00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:41,138 ♪ Be aware of the look in his eyes ♪ 435 00:19:41,221 --> 00:19:44,933 ♪ They tell you the mood he's in ♪ 436 00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:48,979 ♪ What kind of day it's been ♪ 437 00:19:49,062 --> 00:19:52,524 ♪ For the love of him ♪ 438 00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:56,028 ♪ Make him your reason for living ♪ 439 00:19:56,111 --> 00:19:58,697 ♪ Give all the love you can ♪ 440 00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,741 ♪ Give him ♪ 441 00:20:00,824 --> 00:20:04,703 ♪ All the love you can ♪ 442 00:20:05,704 --> 00:20:09,791 ♪ Little things he forgets to do ♪ 443 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:13,378 ♪ Have you told him today I love you ♪ 444 00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:17,925 ♪ When he reaches out be there ♪ 445 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:21,178 ♪ Show him that someone cares ♪ 446 00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:23,680 Everybody! [Laughs] 447 00:20:23,764 --> 00:20:26,892 ♪ For the love of him ♪ 448 00:20:26,975 --> 00:20:31,021 ♪ Make him your reason for living ♪ 449 00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:33,357 ♪ Give all the love you can ♪ 450 00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:39,071 ♪ Give him all the love you can ♪ 451 00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:41,198 Thank you. 452 00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:44,201 ♪♪ [Vocalizing] 453 00:20:44,284 --> 00:20:46,286 ♪♪ [Ends] 454 00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,789 -[Water Running] -[Renee] So? 455 00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:50,415 You're seeing two guys at the same time. 456 00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:51,833 [Water Flushes] 457 00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:53,919 What makes you think they're not? 458 00:20:54,002 --> 00:20:56,421 It's just I kinda told Michael before 459 00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:58,465 that I wasn't seeing anybody else. 460 00:20:58,548 --> 00:21:02,177 So what? Dating is not a truthful business. 461 00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,179 -It isn't? -Of course not. 462 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,597 You put on a little extra makeup 463 00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:07,391 so they don't see what you really look like. 464 00:21:07,474 --> 00:21:08,767 You laugh at each other's jokes, 465 00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:10,227 even when you know they're not funny. 466 00:21:10,310 --> 00:21:12,938 No, dating is about presenting a person 467 00:21:13,021 --> 00:21:15,232 you think he wants to see. 468 00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:17,150 No girl ever lets a guy know 469 00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:19,403 who and what she really is. Am I wrong? 470 00:21:19,486 --> 00:21:21,280 No, I suppose you're not. 471 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,740 Start tellin' the guy the truth on a first date, 472 00:21:23,824 --> 00:21:25,784 and you will never get a second date. 473 00:21:25,867 --> 00:21:28,453 I've told some guys-- [Laughs] 474 00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,414 I'm still a virgin. 475 00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:34,126 And they believe it, too, 'cause they want to. 476 00:21:34,209 --> 00:21:36,003 Some guys I've told... 477 00:21:36,086 --> 00:21:40,924 that I've never even seen a peppermint stick. 478 00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:44,970 -You ever try that? -Oh, that is very funny. 479 00:21:45,053 --> 00:21:46,888 So everybody knows. 480 00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:51,643 -[Door Opens] -What's up with her? 481 00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:54,479 -[Door Closes] -Excuse me. 482 00:21:54,563 --> 00:21:56,481 -[Door Opens, Closes] -What'd I say? 483 00:21:58,442 --> 00:22:01,820 Uh, Cindy? Can I-- Oh! Oh, excuse me. 484 00:22:01,903 --> 00:22:03,155 Can I talk to you for a minute? 485 00:22:03,238 --> 00:22:04,573 No, thank you. I'm really not-- 486 00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:07,034 Everybody doesn't know. 487 00:22:07,117 --> 00:22:09,244 My friend Renee, she had no idea 488 00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:11,079 what she was saying in there. 489 00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:14,875 Obviously, you know. 490 00:22:14,958 --> 00:22:17,753 Uh, yes. But that's because... 491 00:22:17,836 --> 00:22:19,421 everybody runs to me with their problems 492 00:22:19,504 --> 00:22:21,590 because I have a conscience. 493 00:22:21,673 --> 00:22:24,718 Can I talk to you in private? Okay? 494 00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:33,060 Richard told me because-- 495 00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:35,354 I don't believe this. He's so unethical. 496 00:22:35,437 --> 00:22:36,897 Exactly, 497 00:22:36,980 --> 00:22:38,732 which is why he can't deal with an ethical problem. 498 00:22:38,815 --> 00:22:40,233 Richard Fish thinks 499 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:42,069 that moral fiber comes in a breakfast cereal. 500 00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:44,071 He was completely ill-equipped to handle this and-- 501 00:22:44,154 --> 00:22:45,989 and that's why he came to me. 502 00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:48,492 So what did you tell him? 503 00:22:48,575 --> 00:22:51,578 That he shouldn't tell Mark. 504 00:22:53,163 --> 00:22:55,082 But I think you should. 505 00:22:56,875 --> 00:22:59,586 I didn't ask you what you think, Ms. McBeal. 506 00:23:01,088 --> 00:23:03,215 And forgive me, but public opinion... 507 00:23:03,298 --> 00:23:05,384 has never been a big influence in my life. 508 00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:08,220 He's in love with you. 509 00:23:08,303 --> 00:23:10,180 Did he tell you that? 510 00:23:10,263 --> 00:23:13,725 He didn't have to. We can all see it. 511 00:23:24,152 --> 00:23:25,821 It's not a good sign that he's taking you 512 00:23:25,904 --> 00:23:27,447 to the same restaurant. Very bad sign. 513 00:23:27,531 --> 00:23:29,199 It's in his office building. I think he's trying... 514 00:23:29,282 --> 00:23:30,909 to show me off a little, which is a good sign. 515 00:23:30,992 --> 00:23:32,661 And what about Jonathan? 516 00:23:32,744 --> 00:23:35,080 Drinks Wednesday night, so keep Thursday morning clear. 517 00:23:35,163 --> 00:23:36,331 It could go late. 518 00:23:36,415 --> 00:23:37,499 Ally, hello? Today is Wednesday. 519 00:23:37,582 --> 00:23:38,834 What? 520 00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:39,751 It has been ever since this morning. 521 00:23:39,835 --> 00:23:41,837 Today is--Oh, God. 522 00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:44,673 You're double-booked. I love it. 523 00:23:44,756 --> 00:23:46,716 I can't cancel a first date. 524 00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:48,385 Yeah, but you can't just blow a guy off 525 00:23:48,468 --> 00:23:50,637 a half an hour before dinner either. You're cooked. 526 00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:52,514 -I love it. -Wait a minute. 527 00:23:52,597 --> 00:23:54,599 There's no reason why I can't do both. 528 00:23:54,683 --> 00:23:56,309 Dinner is over by 8:00, 529 00:23:56,393 --> 00:23:58,228 and I'm supposed to meet Jonathan at 9:00. It's doable. 530 00:23:58,311 --> 00:24:00,522 But are you doable? Twice in one night? 531 00:24:00,605 --> 00:24:03,024 It is just dinner and it is just drinks, Elaine. 532 00:24:03,108 --> 00:24:05,944 Sorry to put a damper on your vicarious life. 533 00:24:06,027 --> 00:24:07,863 -Ooh! Oh. -[Grunts] 534 00:24:07,946 --> 00:24:10,824 -I'm sorry. Ally. -Mark. 535 00:24:10,907 --> 00:24:14,536 -Mark, is everything okay? -Yeah, sure. 536 00:24:14,619 --> 00:24:15,829 No, no, Mark. 537 00:24:15,912 --> 00:24:16,997 -What's the matter? -Nothing. 538 00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:21,543 -Mark. -I think I'm getting dumped. 539 00:24:21,626 --> 00:24:23,587 Why? 540 00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:26,006 Cindy. She said she wanted to talk about something. 541 00:24:26,089 --> 00:24:30,510 It sounded a little ominous. I think I'm toast. 542 00:24:30,594 --> 00:24:35,474 Oh. Well, you-- Don't jump to conclusions. 543 00:24:35,557 --> 00:24:38,310 Just hear what she has to say. 544 00:24:38,393 --> 00:24:39,686 Oh, I can guess what she has to say. 545 00:24:39,769 --> 00:24:41,104 She seemed distant at lunch. 546 00:24:41,188 --> 00:24:43,023 Well, there might be circumcisions 547 00:24:43,106 --> 00:24:44,357 that you don't know about-- 548 00:24:44,441 --> 00:24:45,609 Circumstances. 549 00:24:47,569 --> 00:24:49,362 Just see--see what the night brings. 550 00:24:49,446 --> 00:24:50,864 [Elevator Bell Dings] 551 00:24:50,947 --> 00:24:52,699 This is so beyond bogus! 552 00:24:52,782 --> 00:24:54,534 Shirley, just let me handle it. 553 00:24:54,618 --> 00:24:57,037 If I believed for one second, Walter, you could handle it, 554 00:24:57,120 --> 00:24:59,039 I wouldn't have insisted on coming. 555 00:24:59,122 --> 00:25:00,957 Ms. Grouper, we're in the conference room. 556 00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:02,459 Oh, this is ridiculous. 557 00:25:05,670 --> 00:25:08,215 6:00. Is this when old people usually eat? 558 00:25:08,298 --> 00:25:11,843 [Laughs] I have an 8:00 meeting, thank you, 559 00:25:11,927 --> 00:25:14,054 and I was desperate to sandwich you in. 560 00:25:14,137 --> 00:25:17,766 Oh, now that is a sandwich that I would like. 561 00:25:17,849 --> 00:25:20,560 [Thinking] God, I'm thinking about sex with him now. 562 00:25:20,644 --> 00:25:22,437 If this our second or third date, officially? 563 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,022 Do lunches count? 564 00:25:24,105 --> 00:25:25,815 -Why? -I don't know. 565 00:25:25,899 --> 00:25:27,234 Just asking. 566 00:25:27,317 --> 00:25:29,736 Have you lied to me yet? 567 00:25:29,819 --> 00:25:32,447 [Thinking] I can't believe that just came out of my mouth. 568 00:25:32,531 --> 00:25:34,449 [Chuckles] I beg your pardon? 569 00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:37,118 People kind of lie a little on early dates-- 570 00:25:37,202 --> 00:25:39,204 I've been told. 571 00:25:39,287 --> 00:25:41,831 Have you? 572 00:25:41,915 --> 00:25:44,918 Actually, yes. 573 00:25:45,001 --> 00:25:47,712 -Your wife isn't really dead. -Oh, no. 574 00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:49,756 She is dead. 575 00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:52,384 [Thinking] I can't believe I'm saying these things. 576 00:25:52,467 --> 00:25:55,512 I'm--I'm so sorry. That was-- 577 00:25:55,595 --> 00:25:57,931 [Gasps] That is so inappropriate. 578 00:25:58,014 --> 00:26:01,268 It's just the fact that you told me that you lied, 579 00:26:01,351 --> 00:26:02,727 it threw me, and I-- 580 00:26:02,811 --> 00:26:05,480 Wh-What was the lie? 581 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:08,024 Okay. 582 00:26:08,108 --> 00:26:10,652 The truth is, 583 00:26:10,735 --> 00:26:13,405 I hate disco. 584 00:26:13,488 --> 00:26:16,575 [Laughs] When I first heard it, it made me want to vomit, 585 00:26:16,658 --> 00:26:19,911 and last night I was nauseous. 586 00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:22,789 Oh. Oh! 587 00:26:22,872 --> 00:26:24,833 Oh, well, that's okay. 588 00:26:24,916 --> 00:26:28,545 So, you're probably into what? Perry Como? 589 00:26:29,713 --> 00:26:31,756 Perry was just a stage with me. 590 00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,593 [Chuckles] Who's your favorite band? 591 00:26:34,676 --> 00:26:37,470 -Oh, never mind. -Why? 592 00:26:37,554 --> 00:26:40,223 -You'll just laugh. -No, I won't laugh. 593 00:26:40,307 --> 00:26:43,935 -Never mind. -I won't laugh. Tell me. 594 00:26:45,103 --> 00:26:47,230 Okay. 595 00:26:47,314 --> 00:26:49,357 [Whispering] Neil Diamond. 596 00:26:50,984 --> 00:26:54,446 Uh, uh-- Oh, he's--he's-- 597 00:26:54,529 --> 00:26:57,240 [Chuckles] Neil. No, he's--he's nice. 598 00:26:57,324 --> 00:27:00,577 No. People forget how fantastic his songs were. 599 00:27:00,660 --> 00:27:02,454 When I was in college I was in a band, 600 00:27:02,537 --> 00:27:04,039 and every time I would play Neil Diamond, 601 00:27:04,122 --> 00:27:07,208 I would have the room eating out of my hand. 602 00:27:08,752 --> 00:27:10,545 -You were in a band? -Mm-hmm. 603 00:27:10,629 --> 00:27:13,423 -Keyboards. -Ah. 604 00:27:13,506 --> 00:27:16,134 Oh, well, they have a piano here. 605 00:27:16,217 --> 00:27:18,178 Sorry? 606 00:27:18,261 --> 00:27:20,680 Go play me something from Neil Diamond. 607 00:27:22,057 --> 00:27:24,643 First of all, I never put down the workingwoman. 608 00:27:24,726 --> 00:27:26,436 What do I look like? The welfare blob? 609 00:27:26,519 --> 00:27:28,229 I'm all for women of power, 610 00:27:28,313 --> 00:27:30,899 women of strength, women of substance. 611 00:27:30,982 --> 00:27:33,151 What I said was men don't want it. 612 00:27:33,234 --> 00:27:34,277 And they don't. 613 00:27:34,361 --> 00:27:36,738 Did you not, as a doctor, 614 00:27:36,821 --> 00:27:38,782 counsel these women to be subordinate? 615 00:27:38,865 --> 00:27:40,283 Did you not, as a doctor, 616 00:27:40,367 --> 00:27:41,826 advise them never to get upset... 617 00:27:41,910 --> 00:27:43,912 or to do anything to complicate his day? 618 00:27:43,995 --> 00:27:46,081 I counsel them to have dinner on the table, 619 00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:48,541 to keep the carpet clean, preferably with a lemon scent, 620 00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:50,460 and should you feel like blowing your top, 621 00:27:50,543 --> 00:27:51,795 blow his instead. 622 00:27:51,878 --> 00:27:54,214 Is it sacrificing? Yes. 623 00:27:54,297 --> 00:27:57,133 That's what the course was about--sacrifice. 624 00:27:57,217 --> 00:28:00,220 Why? Because that's what men want. 625 00:28:00,303 --> 00:28:03,181 And if you want somebody to sue, sue society. 626 00:28:03,264 --> 00:28:05,475 [Wanda] The moment I became a pushover, 627 00:28:05,558 --> 00:28:08,478 like you said, he walked out. 628 00:28:08,561 --> 00:28:11,106 Honey, I don't know you personally. 629 00:28:11,189 --> 00:28:12,607 But even at first blush, 630 00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:14,859 I am picking up on so many things to dislike. 631 00:28:14,943 --> 00:28:16,820 What you need to do is go out and find 632 00:28:16,903 --> 00:28:19,030 a fat guy with no teeth. 633 00:28:19,114 --> 00:28:20,615 The man with no other choices-- 634 00:28:20,699 --> 00:28:22,492 He is your demographic. 635 00:28:24,327 --> 00:28:29,332 Oh, we will go forward with this lawsuit, Ms. Grouper. 636 00:28:29,416 --> 00:28:31,960 Ooh! More threats from the Pokémon. 637 00:28:32,043 --> 00:28:34,087 If this goes to trial, 638 00:28:34,170 --> 00:28:35,922 everything about her becomes relevant, 639 00:28:36,005 --> 00:28:38,550 including why her husband left her. 640 00:28:38,633 --> 00:28:41,094 My bet would be he got his eyesight back. 641 00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:43,179 -[Gasps] -Sue away. 642 00:28:43,263 --> 00:28:46,141 I'd love for this to go to a jury. You know why? 643 00:28:47,559 --> 00:28:50,854 I'm lovable. 644 00:29:00,572 --> 00:29:02,866 Hey. 645 00:29:02,949 --> 00:29:04,868 Cindy. Hey. 646 00:29:08,747 --> 00:29:11,374 -How are you? -I'm fine. How are you? 647 00:29:11,458 --> 00:29:13,877 A little freaked actually. 648 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:16,504 -On the phone, you said-- -Yeah. 649 00:29:16,588 --> 00:29:18,715 What's the matter? 650 00:29:24,262 --> 00:29:26,723 Tell me. 651 00:29:29,517 --> 00:29:32,187 Actually-- 652 00:29:34,189 --> 00:29:36,232 Let's just go out and have a really good time tonight. 653 00:29:36,316 --> 00:29:37,317 Cindy. 654 00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:38,902 No, I really wanna have a nice dinner 655 00:29:38,985 --> 00:29:40,653 and go out dancing, 656 00:29:40,737 --> 00:29:43,072 and, um, we can talk later. 657 00:29:44,783 --> 00:29:47,118 Please? 658 00:29:48,703 --> 00:29:51,414 Sure. 659 00:30:06,846 --> 00:30:09,516 [With Diners] ♪ Sweet Caroline ♪ 660 00:30:10,683 --> 00:30:15,897 ♪ Good times never seemed so good ♪ 661 00:30:15,980 --> 00:30:18,358 ♪ Whoa, whoa ♪ 662 00:30:18,441 --> 00:30:20,944 ♪ I've been inclined ♪ 663 00:30:22,737 --> 00:30:27,742 ♪ To believe they never would ♪ 664 00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:32,914 ♪ Oh, yeah Sweet Caroline ♪ 665 00:30:32,997 --> 00:30:35,375 [Ally] I had to admit, there was something about him. 666 00:30:35,458 --> 00:30:37,627 No, I could tell that he lives for the right reason... 667 00:30:37,710 --> 00:30:39,587 and he loves for the right reason. 668 00:30:39,671 --> 00:30:40,880 ♪ Whoa, oh ♪ 669 00:30:40,964 --> 00:30:42,632 And as I sat there listening, 670 00:30:42,715 --> 00:30:44,425 the whole world just shrank to the size of the room. 671 00:30:44,509 --> 00:30:47,220 There was only one thing that stopped me... 672 00:30:47,303 --> 00:30:50,974 from walking up to that piano and asking him to marry me. 673 00:30:53,268 --> 00:30:55,353 I had another date. 674 00:30:56,646 --> 00:30:59,148 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 675 00:31:00,149 --> 00:31:02,068 ♪ Who do you think you are ♪ 676 00:31:02,151 --> 00:31:04,112 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 677 00:31:04,195 --> 00:31:06,072 Ally Narrating] And this guy was great too. 678 00:31:06,155 --> 00:31:08,408 Now I'd look at Jonathan and I would think, 679 00:31:08,491 --> 00:31:09,826 "Wouldn't it be nice 680 00:31:09,909 --> 00:31:10,952 to forge through the years 681 00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:12,412 figuring out life together?" 682 00:31:12,495 --> 00:31:14,789 And then I'd think, "Michael. Wow. 683 00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:18,626 He's done all the grunt work and can just give me the answers." 684 00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:22,088 ♪ Do you think I can't afford to give you my love ♪ 685 00:31:22,171 --> 00:31:23,965 Hello. 686 00:31:24,048 --> 00:31:26,301 My roommate. She lives to torture me. 687 00:31:26,384 --> 00:31:29,470 -You know this woman? -Like a sister. 688 00:31:29,554 --> 00:31:30,680 Think you might send her away? 689 00:31:30,763 --> 00:31:32,640 ♪ Who do you think you are ♪ 690 00:31:32,724 --> 00:31:34,809 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 691 00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:37,896 ♪ You're never gonna get my love ♪ 692 00:31:37,979 --> 00:31:42,650 ♪ Now I now all the girls I've seen you with ♪ 693 00:31:42,734 --> 00:31:44,527 I ordered a private performance. 694 00:31:44,611 --> 00:31:45,904 I see that. It's nice. 695 00:31:45,987 --> 00:31:48,990 -I pull out all the stops. -[Laughs] 696 00:31:49,073 --> 00:31:52,410 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 697 00:31:52,493 --> 00:31:54,662 -♪ Who do you think are ♪ -What's wrong? 698 00:31:54,746 --> 00:31:57,123 -Nothing. -Cindy. 699 00:31:57,206 --> 00:31:59,292 Whatever it is, just tell me. 700 00:31:59,375 --> 00:32:02,211 No. This is just not the time or the place. 701 00:32:02,295 --> 00:32:04,964 Well, it's making me a little crazy. 702 00:32:05,048 --> 00:32:06,966 How about a clue? 703 00:32:11,054 --> 00:32:12,430 ♪ I'd rather give my love to one guy ♪ 704 00:32:12,513 --> 00:32:14,140 Hold me close. 705 00:32:14,223 --> 00:32:15,975 ♪ That has a love that's true ♪ 706 00:32:16,059 --> 00:32:19,395 ♪ Than to be fooled around and to be hurt by you ♪ 707 00:32:19,479 --> 00:32:21,189 Closer. 708 00:32:21,272 --> 00:32:22,565 ♪ 'Cause when I give my love ♪ 709 00:32:22,649 --> 00:32:25,526 ♪ I want love in return ♪ 710 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:28,529 ♪ Now I know this is a lesson, Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 711 00:32:28,613 --> 00:32:31,199 ♪ You haven't learned Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 712 00:32:31,282 --> 00:32:34,202 ♪ Tell me Who do you think you are ♪ 713 00:32:34,285 --> 00:32:37,580 -Surprise. -♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 714 00:32:37,664 --> 00:32:39,707 ♪ You're never gonna get my love ♪ 715 00:32:39,791 --> 00:32:42,669 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 716 00:32:42,752 --> 00:32:44,587 ♪ You're never gonna break my heart, ah ♪ 717 00:32:44,671 --> 00:32:48,257 -♪ Mr. Big Stuff, oh, yeah ♪ -[Glass Shatters] 718 00:32:48,341 --> 00:32:51,094 ♪ You're never gonna make me cry Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 719 00:32:51,177 --> 00:32:54,597 ♪ Tell me Who do you think you are ♪ 720 00:32:54,681 --> 00:32:56,516 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪♪ 721 00:33:00,937 --> 00:33:02,939 So you knew? 722 00:33:03,022 --> 00:33:04,607 She told me in confidence, made me 723 00:33:04,691 --> 00:33:06,234 promise not to tell you. 724 00:33:06,317 --> 00:33:08,778 I tried to give you a hint. 725 00:33:08,861 --> 00:33:11,906 Everything about him-- her-- 726 00:33:12,907 --> 00:33:14,909 was so perfect. 727 00:33:14,993 --> 00:33:17,829 You know, these things happen, Mark. 728 00:33:19,205 --> 00:33:22,709 What do you mean, "these things happen"? 729 00:33:22,792 --> 00:33:27,296 My girlfriend has a penis! These things don't happen! 730 00:33:30,216 --> 00:33:32,677 [Sighs] Can I just say one thing? 731 00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:34,846 [Sighs] 732 00:33:34,929 --> 00:33:39,767 It's not easy finding a person to love in this world, Mark. 733 00:33:39,851 --> 00:33:45,064 And whoever you end up with, she won't be perfect. 734 00:33:45,148 --> 00:33:47,650 Cindy is beautiful. 735 00:33:47,734 --> 00:33:49,569 And when people see you with her, 736 00:33:49,652 --> 00:33:52,572 they're more impressed with you. 737 00:33:52,655 --> 00:33:54,866 But what I'm trying to say is don't dump her. 738 00:33:54,949 --> 00:33:58,244 Use her as bait to attract other beautiful women-- 739 00:33:58,327 --> 00:34:01,497 ones without meat whistles. 740 00:34:12,133 --> 00:34:15,261 -[Door Closes] -Nobody loves a sage. 741 00:34:15,344 --> 00:34:17,764 I still don't know why you have to talk to him. 742 00:34:17,847 --> 00:34:18,973 Because as horrible as this woman is, 743 00:34:19,057 --> 00:34:20,767 she's pretty on target. 744 00:34:20,850 --> 00:34:22,518 And if you insist on going forward-- 745 00:34:22,602 --> 00:34:23,978 I do. 746 00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:25,646 Then we have to at least explore your ex-husband's 747 00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:27,815 reasons for leaving you. 748 00:34:27,899 --> 00:34:30,359 [Elevator Bell Dings] 749 00:34:33,821 --> 00:34:36,240 -Jonathan is here. -What? 750 00:34:36,324 --> 00:34:39,243 He just went to the unisex. He brought you these flowers. 751 00:34:39,327 --> 00:34:42,246 -Wow. -Wow is right. 752 00:34:42,330 --> 00:34:44,999 There's probably three decent guys in this stupid town. 753 00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:47,251 You've got two of them, and Mark's got the other. 754 00:34:47,335 --> 00:34:48,586 Oh, that's real funny, Elaine. 755 00:34:48,669 --> 00:34:50,838 He took it hard. 756 00:34:52,507 --> 00:34:54,509 Ally. 757 00:34:56,385 --> 00:35:00,765 Michael. Michael, wh-what a surprise. 758 00:35:00,848 --> 00:35:04,310 Well, I was in the neighborhood and-- 759 00:35:04,393 --> 00:35:08,147 Actually, I wasn't. That was a lie too. [Chuckles] 760 00:35:08,231 --> 00:35:10,233 I just came to see you. 761 00:35:11,484 --> 00:35:13,986 Nice flowers. 762 00:35:14,070 --> 00:35:16,823 Oh. [Laughs] Oh, uh, the-- 763 00:35:16,906 --> 00:35:18,825 Oh, yeah. Thanks. 764 00:35:18,908 --> 00:35:21,661 C-Can you excuse me for just one second? 765 00:35:23,913 --> 00:35:25,873 [Whispering] Can you keep Jonathan in the bathroom? 766 00:35:25,957 --> 00:35:27,250 How am I supposed to do that? 767 00:35:27,333 --> 00:35:28,376 Just use your imagination, Elaine. 768 00:35:28,459 --> 00:35:29,502 Keep Jonathan in the bathroom 769 00:35:29,585 --> 00:35:30,753 until I get rid of Michael. 770 00:35:30,837 --> 00:35:32,588 -Well, uh-- -[Chuckles] 771 00:35:34,298 --> 00:35:38,136 So. Well, what a shock-- surprise. 772 00:35:38,219 --> 00:35:41,013 Would you have dinner again with me tonight? 773 00:35:42,181 --> 00:35:45,434 You came here just to ask me that? 774 00:35:45,518 --> 00:35:48,354 [Door Opens] 775 00:35:49,647 --> 00:35:52,567 -[Door Closes] -Oh. Hello. 776 00:35:53,693 --> 00:35:55,319 I'm Elaine. 777 00:35:55,403 --> 00:35:58,072 Yes. We just met two seconds ago. 778 00:35:58,156 --> 00:36:00,992 -[Chuckles] -Oh, right. 779 00:36:01,075 --> 00:36:03,494 [Clears Throat] Before you go-- 780 00:36:03,578 --> 00:36:06,080 We are conducting a poll 781 00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:09,125 on people's feelings about the unisex, 782 00:36:09,208 --> 00:36:12,336 and I thought maybe I could ask you a few questions. 783 00:36:12,420 --> 00:36:14,964 Uh, maybe some other time. 784 00:36:17,091 --> 00:36:19,677 Uh-- 785 00:36:24,307 --> 00:36:26,475 -[Grunts] -Your family? 786 00:36:26,559 --> 00:36:27,894 My kids. 787 00:36:27,977 --> 00:36:30,605 There's only two of 'em. It shouldn't be too bad. 788 00:36:30,688 --> 00:36:33,441 I really want you to meet them. 789 00:36:33,524 --> 00:36:36,027 Wow. That's kind of a big deal, Michael. I-- 790 00:36:36,110 --> 00:36:37,778 -I know. -[Jonathan] Get off me! 791 00:36:37,862 --> 00:36:41,032 Uh, sure. Sure. Great. Great. That'd be great. 792 00:36:41,115 --> 00:36:44,785 Why don't you call me later and just tell me what time? 793 00:36:44,869 --> 00:36:47,955 -Get off! -[Laughing] 794 00:36:48,039 --> 00:36:49,582 -[Elevator Bell Dings] -Ooh. Ah! Ah. 795 00:36:49,665 --> 00:36:51,250 So I'll see you tonight. 796 00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:52,877 There you go. So I'll see you-- 797 00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:55,213 I'll see you later tonight. Tonight. Bye. 798 00:36:55,296 --> 00:36:58,799 -Bye. -Get off of me! 799 00:36:58,883 --> 00:37:01,844 Elaine, no! Bad girl! Bad! 800 00:37:01,928 --> 00:37:04,513 Go to my office! No! 801 00:37:07,391 --> 00:37:10,061 [Clears Throat] 802 00:37:12,939 --> 00:37:16,359 -She's a guard secretary. -She's crazy. 803 00:37:16,442 --> 00:37:19,195 I know, but I just don't have the heart to fire her. 804 00:37:20,947 --> 00:37:22,865 Well, I didn't mean to interrupt your day. 805 00:37:22,949 --> 00:37:24,533 I, uh, just came to say 806 00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:26,577 that I can't stop thinking about you. 807 00:37:26,661 --> 00:37:30,748 Mmm. Well, you've been on my top two thoughts as well. 808 00:37:30,831 --> 00:37:33,000 Sorry? 809 00:37:33,084 --> 00:37:35,086 It's just a little joke. It's nothing. 810 00:37:35,169 --> 00:37:37,088 God, you are so beautiful. 811 00:37:37,171 --> 00:37:40,174 -Do you know that? -No. [Mumbles] 812 00:37:40,258 --> 00:37:43,219 Um, well, thank you. 813 00:37:43,302 --> 00:37:46,722 [Chuckles] Can I see you tonight? 814 00:37:46,806 --> 00:37:51,352 Uh, tonight's tough. Um, tomorrow? 815 00:37:51,435 --> 00:37:55,356 Great. Great. Um, I'll call. 816 00:37:57,149 --> 00:37:59,235 Okay. Bye. 817 00:38:03,739 --> 00:38:05,700 [Exhales] 818 00:38:05,783 --> 00:38:09,161 -[Sighs] -You are headed for trouble. 819 00:38:09,245 --> 00:38:11,247 Give me one. 820 00:38:13,207 --> 00:38:14,834 And she says it's when 821 00:38:14,917 --> 00:38:17,086 she became more submissive that you left her. 822 00:38:18,379 --> 00:38:22,091 -It wasn't exactly that. -Can you tell us what it was? 823 00:38:23,551 --> 00:38:26,137 -I'm not really comfortable. -Mr. Spickett, 824 00:38:26,220 --> 00:38:28,139 I know this is difficult. 825 00:38:28,222 --> 00:38:30,433 But in order for your wife to prevail in this lawsuit, 826 00:38:30,516 --> 00:38:32,184 we have to show that your split 827 00:38:32,268 --> 00:38:34,603 was connected to this course she took. 828 00:38:34,687 --> 00:38:36,605 I'm a very weak man, Ms. Porter. 829 00:38:36,689 --> 00:38:40,568 The truth is I stopped loving Wanda a long time ago, 830 00:38:40,651 --> 00:38:42,611 but I was afraid to leave her, 831 00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:45,990 mainly because I was afraid of her a little. 832 00:38:46,073 --> 00:38:48,868 Believe it or not, I stayed with her for about six years... 833 00:38:48,951 --> 00:38:51,329 because I didn't have the guts to confront her, 834 00:38:51,412 --> 00:38:53,914 to face an unpleasant scene with her. 835 00:38:53,998 --> 00:38:56,334 When she became-- I don't know-- 836 00:38:56,417 --> 00:39:00,504 weak herself on the advice of the doctor, 837 00:39:00,588 --> 00:39:03,174 I got the nerve to tell her what I really thought-- 838 00:39:04,675 --> 00:39:07,511 that I didn't want to live with her. 839 00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:09,305 You stayed with this woman 840 00:39:09,388 --> 00:39:10,806 six years after you stopped loving her... 841 00:39:10,890 --> 00:39:12,933 because you didn't want to face 842 00:39:13,017 --> 00:39:14,185 an unpleasant scene with her? 843 00:39:14,268 --> 00:39:16,103 [High-pitched Voice] Well, I don't think I truly 844 00:39:16,187 --> 00:39:18,272 knew I was doing that. 845 00:39:18,356 --> 00:39:21,317 But, yes. 846 00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:25,321 Okay. You can go. 847 00:39:30,451 --> 00:39:33,162 I didn't tell her I never loved her. 848 00:39:33,245 --> 00:39:35,539 I'd appreciate you not telling her. 849 00:39:41,670 --> 00:39:44,006 Mmm. 850 00:39:44,090 --> 00:39:47,301 Well, I guess there was cause and effect. 851 00:39:47,385 --> 00:39:49,011 Had she not taken this doctor's advice, 852 00:39:49,095 --> 00:39:50,471 they might still be together. 853 00:39:50,554 --> 00:39:51,889 Oh, right, Ling. 854 00:39:51,972 --> 00:39:53,933 We'll just stand in front of a jury and say, 855 00:39:54,016 --> 00:39:56,394 "You see? He never loved her. Blame the doctor." 856 00:39:56,477 --> 00:39:59,063 Well? What'd he say? 857 00:40:02,483 --> 00:40:05,694 Uh--Uh, Wanda, 858 00:40:05,778 --> 00:40:08,572 you might have a case, but it's just too tough to make. 859 00:40:08,656 --> 00:40:10,866 We think you should drop it. 860 00:40:10,950 --> 00:40:14,036 After what she did to me? How can I? 861 00:40:15,162 --> 00:40:17,915 Well, you see, the thing is, 862 00:40:17,998 --> 00:40:20,251 it really encroaches into divorce law. 863 00:40:20,334 --> 00:40:22,753 And this is a no-fault state. 864 00:40:22,837 --> 00:40:24,755 Our legal recommendation 865 00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:27,675 is for you to just walk away from this. 866 00:40:29,009 --> 00:40:31,929 If we go to court, you'll just get more hurt. 867 00:40:33,597 --> 00:40:35,766 Just let it go, Wanda. 868 00:41:11,260 --> 00:41:13,971 Sorry I ran off. 869 00:41:14,054 --> 00:41:17,766 I always do that when a girl seems too happy to see me. 870 00:41:17,850 --> 00:41:20,102 Ha, ha. 871 00:41:20,186 --> 00:41:22,771 Look, I am sorry. 872 00:41:24,315 --> 00:41:26,692 I could have handled it maybe better. 873 00:41:28,027 --> 00:41:30,404 Mark, your reaction was normal. Trust me. 874 00:41:30,488 --> 00:41:34,074 So if you're here to apologize for that, apology accepted. 875 00:41:34,158 --> 00:41:36,952 I came here for that, but-- 876 00:41:37,036 --> 00:41:39,330 Do you have plans tonight? 877 00:41:40,748 --> 00:41:42,917 What are you saying? 878 00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:46,170 What I'm saying is... 879 00:41:48,380 --> 00:41:51,175 I've been thinking about this all day, and-- 880 00:41:52,593 --> 00:41:54,553 and as hard as I try, 881 00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:59,600 I can't see you... 882 00:42:01,101 --> 00:42:03,687 as anything other than a woman-- 883 00:42:07,525 --> 00:42:09,944 a woman I want to continue to see. 884 00:42:16,075 --> 00:42:17,701 [Laughs] 885 00:42:19,578 --> 00:42:20,955 I don't know why I feel 886 00:42:21,038 --> 00:42:22,498 like crying right now, but I do. 887 00:42:41,642 --> 00:42:43,352 We've been encouraging Daddy to date. 888 00:42:43,435 --> 00:42:45,896 I'm so glad he finally met somebody. 889 00:42:45,980 --> 00:42:48,440 [Thinking] My God. His daughter is older than me. 890 00:42:48,524 --> 00:42:51,151 Well, I'm--I'm glad to have met him. 891 00:42:51,235 --> 00:42:53,821 If this works out, I could be calling you Mom. 892 00:42:53,904 --> 00:42:57,783 [Thinking] Only once, because I'd kill you. 893 00:42:57,866 --> 00:43:00,703 [Laughs] Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves, Andrea. 894 00:43:00,786 --> 00:43:02,705 Well, Daddy, if you're introducing her to us, 895 00:43:02,788 --> 00:43:04,540 that means it could be serious. 896 00:43:05,874 --> 00:43:08,460 Ah. Here's your brother. 897 00:43:09,587 --> 00:43:13,007 Ally, my son, Jonathan. 898 00:43:17,177 --> 00:43:18,762 Hi. 899 00:43:18,846 --> 00:43:20,806 [Ally Narrating] I never got his last name. 900 00:43:20,889 --> 00:43:22,933 Hi. 901 00:43:23,017 --> 00:43:25,102 I--I think we've met. 902 00:43:25,185 --> 00:43:29,857 Yeah. Yeah, um, I think we have. 903 00:43:32,151 --> 00:43:35,863 [Nose Whistles] 904 00:44:16,236 --> 00:44:17,780 {\an8}[Woman] You stinker! 69285

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