All language subtitles for Ally.McBeal.S03E07.1999.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.AAC-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

They're still a little baggy.

That's the style these days.

It's those damn teenagers.
They control fashion.

Everything is youth, youth, youth.

Don't teenagers wanna look good?

Yes, but they like baggy.

Probably so the boys
can conceal their weapons,

and the girls can hide being pregnant.

Blame the schools all you want,
but it's the parents.

-Children are victims of their parents.
-Ma'am--

-You're newly single, aren't you?
-Ma'am, I just want a pair--

I noticed the mark
where your ring used to be.

If I could just--

Newly single women want tight jeans.

If you're gonna get a man,
you gotta sell your ass a little.

Am I right?

Nothing like ripe rump cheeks to get a guy
interested in your phone number.

-Am I right? It's vile.
-[People Shouting]

You don't care about
how many years I've put in here?

Steven.

-Take it easy.
-I have been here for 17 years!

[Shouts] Does that mean anything to you?

Let me explain.

[Grunts]

-[Grunting]
-[Shouts, Indistinct]

-[Shouting, Indistinct]
-Steven--

-[Gasps]
-Hey!

-[Snarls]
-Hey!

[Grunts]

[Both Grunting]

[Screams] Ooh!

-[Shrieks]
-Hey, what are you--

-[Shrieks]
-Ooh!

-You hit Santa!
-[Screaming]

Oh, get off of her, for God's sakes!
Security!

-Ooh!
-[Grunting]

-Hey!
-Stop!

-[Shrieks]
-[Grunting]

-Hey!
-Ooh!

[Karate Yell]

[Grunts, Groans]

-What is wrong with you?
-They attacked me!

-No, you attacked us first!
-You started it!

-They were just trying to help Santa.
-They came after me!

All right, Dana. I won't let
you get away with this, Larry.

-Steven--
-Seventeen years of service.

Well, ever heard of John Cage?

He's probably
the best lawyer in this town.

-He will make you pay.
-I've offered you another job.

I'm Santa Claus!

I am the spirit of Christmas,
you son of a bitch!

-Steven, shut up.
-I will make you pay.

♪ I've been down this road ♪

♪ Walkin' the line
that's painted by pride ♪

♪ And I have made mistakes in my life ♪

♪ That I just can't hide ♪

♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪

♪ For what love has to bring Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ I got myself together ♪

♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪

♪ I've been searching my soul tonight ♪

♪ I know there's so much more to life ♪

♪ Now I know I can shine a light ♪

♪ To find my way back home ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Baby, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

One, two, three.

[Groans]

-Is he okay?
-He's okay. Maybe a broken rib.

-Is anyone here pressing charges?
-No. No.

It's an internal dispute. Thank you.

Are you okay?

Yeah. What happened?

Oh, I fired our Santa Claus.

Everything that happened after, you saw.

And heard.

Listen, um, that lawyer
he mentioned, John Cage?

I actually worked with him
until about a week ago.

Really? Is he as good
as Steven says he is?

-I'm afraid he is.
-[Sighs]

But I know how to beat him.

-You took the case?
-Why shouldn't I?

Georgia, what is this about--
beating us, beating me?

Oh, right, Billy.

Newman's department store.
I'm about to turn that down.

Typical for you to think
it's all about you.

Stupid too,
but I've heard that can happen

when a person soaks his head in bleach
for too long.

Georgia, I suggest that you keep
our problems between you and me,

and I hope you don't
air them out in the courtroom.

Billy, this is about work.

There's nothing going on
between you and me.

-Really?
-Really.

-Anything else?
-Not a thing.

-Then get out.
-Fine.

Fine.

-Too fat?
-Yes. Believe that?

He says I'm too fat to be Santa Claus.

Did he actually cite your physicality?

Yes. Yes. He said, "You're too fat.

Goin' with a thin Santa this year."

-Well, fat is out, and so am I?
-It wasn't job performance?

No. No, no, no, no, no.
He said I was too fat.

That is why I'm gone. Fat, fat, fat!

Why? It's a function of the job, isn't it?
Who ever heard of a Slim-Fast Santa?

The problem is, if we go with that--it's
okay to hire somebody based on weight--

we can't very well say it's wrongful to
fire somebody because of the weight.

Why not? This is America.
It's always okay to hire somebody.

It's never okay to fire them.
That's why this country works, damn it!

How about ageism? If they're
gonna go with a younger Santa--

I thought of that. They can get around it.

Basically, they're hiring
an actor to play a part.

If the part calls for somebody young, they
can't be required to hire an older actor.

Oral contract.

That's the only thing I can
think of, but it's weak.

[Sighs] You'll never guess who Newman's
hired to represent them.

-[Both] Who?
-Georgia.

-What?
-I love when I get to tell.

We should mark up a T.R.O.
with the clerk's office.

Hit 'em before they have time
to dig a bunker. Can you second chair?

Sure.

I'll get some more information from
Steven.

I think we should go in
as soon as possible.

Okay.

[Hums]

Excuse me. Are-Are you lost?

Are you?

[Gasps]

You have to help him.

[Voice Echoes] Ally?

Ally?

Huh? Uh, Ling. Uh, hi.
Hel-Hello. Wh-What's up?

-Relax. I'm not gonna kiss you.
-[Nervous Chuckle]

On, that-that-that's a good one.
Ha, ha. Ha, ha. Ha, ha.

-What's the matter?
-Um--

Um, nothing. I-I just, uh,
bumped into an old friend.

Me.

And, um--Well, I--

[Sighs]

-Now what?
-Who knows?

Nobody else can help him but you.

[Gasps]

[Panting]

What do you want? Shouldn't you be out...

bleaching your head
or kissing some client?

Great. I need somebody to talk to.
I see I've come to the wrong office.

Somebody to talk to?
I'll talk to you. Cheater. Pig. Traitor.

Gee, I didn't see you react this way when
I kissed another woman last year.

-Because it was me!
-Exactly.

Now you've completely trivialized
your cheating on Georgia with me...

by cheating on her with somebody else--

a woman you barely know,
you lying, cheating pig!

[Exhales] I thought that our deceitful
little affair meant something.

-Hey, can't you see I'm hurting?
-Ha!

-"Ha"?
-Yes, ha!

Why the hell did you kiss that woman?

You didn't come down on Georgia...

when she was sucking tongue
with your father.

-Billy,
-[Smoke Hissing]

I don't believe that
violence solves anything,

so you should leave before
I leap to a poor solution.

-There was no contract.
-There was an oral contract,

-not to mention the fact that--
-Certainly a store should have a right--

You cannot terminate a person for obesity.

It is wrongful,

especially when we're talking about
Santa Claus, where being stout...

-is a function of the job.
-Not the new Newman's Santa.

What do you mean, the new Santa?

Newman's has decided to go with a new,
lean, health-conscious Santa Claus.

He's more commensurate with the store's
demographics.

Fat and jolly belongs at Wal-Mart.

At Newman's, sitting on Santa's lap
should be its own reward.

What are you talking about?

Things have changed in the North Pole.

May I present to the court
Kristopher and Kristen Kringle.

This is your new Mr. and Mrs. Claus?

Naughty or nice, Judge?
Come to Newman's and find out.

Your Honor, in the spirit
of Christmas tradition,

let us all take a serious extended moment.

Mr. Cage, we will not be taking moments.

The only issue before this
court is whether or not...

there was an oral contract, and whether it
was wrongfully breached.

For that, we'll have a hearing.

I'll hear from fat Santa after lunch.

I mean, Mr. Mallory.

-Adjourned.
-[Gavel Raps]

"Sitting in his lap is its own reward"?

-There's no contract here, Ally.
-Let's go.

Uh, well, w-w-wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait. Um--

Georgia. [Chuckles] How ya doin'?

-Who's asking?
-Well--

Elaine, actually.
She wants to tell people.

And me. I'm asking.

-Are you okay?
-Fine.

I just went on this new diet.

I lost 170 pounds of dead weight.
I feel great.

-Are you sure?
-You can have him, Ally.

I don't want him.

Yuck.

[Shudders] Gross.

[Exhales]

He never specifically promised you that
you could continue being Santa?

Well, it was just understood.

I mean, I was Santa
before he even worked there.

It was just a given that I would be Santa
forever at Newman's, and--

We've got a statute of frauds problem.

If it's a forever thing or more than a
year, the promise can't be oral.

It's gotta be written.

You need to be able to say
he promised you...

for this year specifically
that you would be Santa.

No, Steven.

-Steven, don't cry.
-I'm sorry.

He has a duct problem in his left eye.

Whenever he gets emotional, happy, sad--

He cries out of one eye?

Ye--You know,
an oral contract can be implied.

Did he give you instructions,
tell you to push certain toys?

[Sighs] I'll have to think.

-We've got nothing. You do know that.
-There's got to be something.

[Toilet Flushes]

What about the threat of
negative publicity?

This is Newman's.
They throw the big Christmas parade.

To fire Santa Claus right before
Christmas? Not very sympathetic.

Well, some people don't really care how
unsympathetic they come off.

-You know what, Ally?
-Uh--[Babbles]

-I won't be judged by you.
-Too late. The verdict is in, pig.

-Georgia is the one who strayed first.
-After you bleached your head.

After you turned into a chauvinist.

After you hired your little
candy striper assistant.

Georgia had a right to sit
on that barstool.

Did it entitle her to kiss somebody? No.

But you owed it to her to find out
why she did it.

You owed her some exploration
of the why, Billy,

and instead, you kiss some gold-digging
bombshell client.

And that is what you're upset about!
Not that I betrayed Georgia,

but that I kissed somebody else,
that I betrayed you.

It's just like you said. You're upset that
I demeaned my affair with you!

Well, you know what?
There's two kinds of pigs:

chauvinist pigs and selfish pigs.

I am one. You're the other.
Maybe there's some chemistry here.

Two pigs lookin' to pod each other.

If you think I'm gonna go near your pod,
you're as deluded as you are deranged.

-Now I'm deranged too!
-And pathetic.

[Gasp]

-That's nice.
-Yeah.

You were paid a day rate,
were you not, Mr. Mallory?

-Yes.
-And if another job came along,

if maybe you decided to switch careers,
you were free to do so, correct?

[Chair Scraping Floor]

Your Honor, if I may, I'd like to
instruct my client...

-to answer "no" to that question.
-Hey!

Mr. Cage.

Well, I apologize, but she's trying to
establish...

if my client felt no binding obligation
to work at Newman's,

then they accordingly should feel no
binding obligation towards him.

It's a clever yet tricky question,

therefore imperative that
my client answer "no."

Your Honor--

Mr. Cage, I've had enough
of you. Do you hear me?

I do. Let me go on record
I'd be shocked and dismayed...

if you let your contempt for me
punish Santa Claus.

[Sighs] Your Honor, I have
practiced law with this man,

and when he stunts like this--

I will not be attacked
simply because I'm short.

[Georgia] What?

The record will reflect she kicks midgets.

-You've got to be kidding!
-Mr. Cage,

let her ask her question.

Mr. Mallory, since your termination,
have you been offered any other jobs?

-Yes, many.
-To play Santa Claus?

Yes, but... Newman's Santa Claus.

To people in New England, he is the Santa
Claus. Everybody knows that.

But in terms of income, you have been
offered employment...

that would more than make up
for lost wages, correct?

[Sighs] Yes.

[Nose Whistles]

-You tried ageism?
-[Groans] It won't fly.

-And weight?
-I told you, they're hiring an actor.

-They can designate type. If it's thin--
-Is he gay?

Can't fire homosexuals these days.
Or maybe he's part Indian.

-That's good. Indians are in.
-He's a white Anglo heterosexual.

The law doesn't care about him.
We need real merits.

He should've joined a union.
They'd never be able to fire him...

if he were in a union, even if he was
touching the children.

Look, you're dead. Why can't he just go be
a Santa Claus at Sears?

Because this is Newman's.
That's why the others want him.

Because the Newman's
Santa Claus--that's Santa.

Yeah. I remember when I was little,

I hated Christmas 'cause
my parents weren't together,

so I'd go to Newman's,
and just sitting on his lap--

I don't know. Christmas just became
real with him.

Everything else went away.
He was, uh, magic. [Chuckles]

Would you testify to that?

-Excuse me?
-I have an idea.

We need to take this to another court.

Would you say what you
just said on the stand?

Well, I guess.

-[Sighs]
-[Door Closes]

[Young Ally Giggling]

[Boy] I'll probably be a fireman.

[Young Ally] They don't
make much money, you know.

I don't care.

I get to help people.

Artists don't make much either, you know.

[Laughing]

What's the matter?

Ally?

Ally?

-Hmm?
-What's wrong?

[Stammering] Um, I--Well, um--

I've been getting these visions
of myself at age 10.

And she keeps on saying,

"You have to save him.
You have to save him."

And I thought that she meant
Santa Claus, and--

And suddenly I--

That's not who she means.

What does she mean?

I-I--I think that, um--

Well, I think that
she wants me to save you.

Save me? Why do I need to be saved?

I don't know. I--[Laughs]

I always figured of all people,
that I need saving more--

Do you remember...

how we'd talk about
what we'd be when we grew up?

Do you remember?

Not really.

You don't?

Well, um,

you-you were going to be either
a doctor or a fireman...

because you wanted to be able to help at
least one person every single day, and...

I was gonna be an artist...

and-and paint the world
with beautiful colors.

[Mouths Words]

And we became lawyers.

[Exhales]

How did that happen?

Maybe...

we both need saving.

Mm.

No, she keeps saying,
"You have to save him."

Maybe because at least I can remember.

You can't even do that.

[Door Opens]

[Door Closes]

And sitting on his lap, you believed.

We knew every store had a Santa,

some guy from the Salvation Army with
cotton glued to his chin,

but this one--

at Newman's--

To a six-year-old, he was real.

I'm confused. A-Are you a fan of "real"?
Or is it fantasy?

I suppose there's something to be said
of reality blurring with the make-believe.

Oh, you mean like your hair?

Gee, Georgia. Do you suddenly have a
problem with long-blonde-haired women?

-All right.
-Okay.

I don't have anything else.

Your Honor, I call
James Russell to the stand.

How long have you been C.E.O.
of Newman's department store?

Eleven years.

And for all that time, Steven Mallory
has been your Santa Claus, has he not?

-He has, in fact.
-But, Mr. Russell,

suddenly--or I should say,
uh, two days ago--

[Spectators Murmuring]

Your Honor, he tried to hit me.

I apologize. I have a nervous tic.

When I get nervous, my arm shoots out,
and I can't control it.

In extreme circumstances, both arms do it.

I-I was not trying to hit you.

Oh. Mr. Russell, can you tell us...

why you suddenly terminated Mr. Mallory

and opted to go with a more lean,
ripped version?

The ad agencies have been
telling us for years...

the 18-to-49-year-olds are the shoppers.

They're the ones who spend the money.
We've been making all sorts of changes...

to broaden our appeal to this demographic.

Well, including a thin Santa Claus?

You should see the teenage girls
lining up to sit on him.

Yeah, but don't you see anything wrong
with having a hard body serve as--

Television works this way.
Why can't a department store?

Mr. Russell, would you agree
that the Newman's Santa,

he's always been the preeminent
Santa Claus in New England?

-He still can be.
-Leads the Christmas parade.

-Still will.
-Like Miss Porter testified,

when kids want to see the real
Santa Claus, come to Newman's.

-That's what you advertise?
-Yes.

You've also stressed commitment to
community. Has Newman's not done that?

Yes. And, um, we will continue to
emphasize that ideal.

Mm-hmm. All right. What about tradition?

"Since 1912." That's in your logo.

Uh, haven't you always sold tradition as
part of Newman's heritage?

Of course, but an allegiance
to tradition...

certainly doesn't preempt
changing with the times.

Yeah. That was a dandy answer.
Your shareholders would be proud.

-[Both] Objection.
-Sustained.

How much of your business is repeat
business?

Almost 60%.

-So loyalty's important.
-Yes.

Yeah. Give back to your customers.
Give back to the community.

-Is that right?
-Yes, that is the Newman's way.

Your customers know that when
they come to Newman's?

I would hope so.

A lot of people turn out
for that parade, don't they?

Yes.

-Couple hundred thousand or so.
-It's a big parade.

-It's also televised.
-Yes, it is.

What do you think your loyal customers are
gonna say to their children...

when they see this thin, young Santa?

-I would hope--
-"There is no Santa"?

Or do they tell their children they fall
outside Newman's demographic?

-That isn't fair.
-Fair? Does fair count here?

Let me talk about fair, Mr. Russell.

-Objection.
-Sustained.

Dial it back, Mr. Cage. Are you okay, sir?

I-I'm fine.

We were talking about fairness.

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ There's a photo I've been looking for ♪

♪ It's a picture of the boy next door ♪

♪ And I loved him more than words
could say yeah ♪

♪ Never knew it till he moved away ♪

♪ Faded pictures in my scrapbook ♪

♪ Just thought I'd take one more look ♪♪

-Billy.
-Hey.

-What are you doing?
-Nothing.

Excellent. I love that.
It's why I hired you.

You ever remember your dreams, Richard?

-The wet ones I try to. Why?
-I'm serious.

Do you ever sit back and take stock of
what you planned

for yourself in high school...

and then measure it against what you are?

You mean, do I wonder whether I sold out?

Yeah.

Sometimes, but I always planned to sell
out, so I'm living my dream.

-Forget it.
-Billy.

Obviously you're going through something.

And you're no doubt upset with yourself
for being a total schmuck.

But what you need to keep in mind:
before this you were boring.

Whatever phase you're going through,
embrace it,

because at least it's interesting.

Sure, you look a little silly
as this Billy Idol horn-dogger,

but what's important:
people are talking about you.

Thank you, Richard. I feel much better.

Yeah? Anytime.

Richard, where do you see
yourself 20 years from now?

Now, see, there's your mistake, Billy.

By not asking that question of myself now,
20 years hence I won't be disappointed.

But... here's a question
you can ask yourself.

Why did you kiss that woman? Really?

He talked about loyalty to the shoppers--
repeat shoppers.

Commitment to community. The obligation
to give something back.

He told you--that man!

Children sat on this
Santa's lap and grew up...

patronizing Newman's, dreaming of one day
taking their children...

to sit on Santa's lap in that same spirit
of Christmas.

That spirit of tradition that he laid
claim to--that man!

Does tradition call for them to obliterate
the image of Kris Kringle?

Does commitment to community say,
"Hey, for the biggest Christmas parade...

"in New England, let's shatter Santa.

Focus on demographics--18 to 49.
Well, they shop"?

Yeah, the heck with Santa. The heck
with-with children!

The heck with Yuletide magic!

Who cares whether children
believe in jolly old Saint Nick?

[Girl] Mommy!

If they want to see Santa,
let 'em go to Wal-Mart.

Let 'em go to Sears. Let 'em go
to Service Merchandise.

Next, let's go after Rudolph!

Frosty! Then we can kill the Easter Bunny!

[Children Crying]

Objection! He planted these
children in the gallery!

-Oh, turn a deaf ear. He does.
-Objection!

-Pay no attention to these tears.
-Objection!

-Go kick an elf!
-Objection!

That's enough. Remove the crying children
from my courtroom.

-Now.
-[Crying Continues]

Mr. Russell, stop flapping.

Was that effective? That seemed a little
outrageous, John.

Well, a judge can be influenced

by public opinion almost as much
as a department store.

Yeah, but... did you rent those children?

-What the hell was that?
-You've already objected, Georgia.

-That was despicable.
-All right.

Oh, get out of my way! I don't have to put
up with you anymore!

[Sighs] I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean that.

-Could I please talk to you?
-[Groans]

Clearly you're not fine.

You're very angry.

Do you blame me for Billy
kissing that woman?

I mean, it's okay to, Georgia.
I'll own it.

I-I certainly didn't
help things between you two.

But--But, look,
for-for you two not to talk,

-to just--
-What?

You wanna get us back together now, Ally?

I've got to let your guilt
have a life now too?

[Sighs]

That isn't fair.

Don't worry about me, Ally.

I am fine.

Fine.

♪♪ [Up-tempo Pop]

[Vonda] ♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ Baby, I know ♪

♪ It's over for me and you ♪ yeah ♪

[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

[Man] ♪ You cheated and you lied, girl ♪

-♪ You been untrue ♪
-[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

[Vonda] ♪ Oh, no matter
what I did for you ♪

[Man] ♪ You still wouldn't be true ♪

♪ You just cheat
and lie to me all the time ♪

-[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
-[Vonda] ♪ Oh ♪

-♪ I used to work ♪
-Know what you want?

♪ Like a slave for you all day long ♪

-[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
-[Man] ♪ I'd bring you my money ♪

♪ But you'd never, never be at home, no ♪

-[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
-[Vonda] ♪ Don't explain ♪

-♪ I know where you been ♪
-[Man] ♪ In the arms of another man ♪

[Both] ♪ You just cheat
and lie to me all the time ♪

H-Hey, Billy. You havin' a good time?

-As a matter of fact, yes.
-Thing is, usually when you say...

you're having a good time,
it usually means that you're not.

Ally, did you come here
to dance or save me?

Oh, see, I just came to have some fun,
because that's what this is. Right?

Right.

-It's not too late.
-Nope. Night's young.

[Vonda] ♪ Go away, and don't you
ever, ever call my name ♪

[Ikettes] ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪♪ [Fades]

So, what happens now?

Well, they give their final statements,
then the judge will rule.

-Oh, we should get going.
-I had a dream last night...

that Santa kept coming down my chimney...

over and over and over again.

-Never mind, Elaine.
-Hmm.

Maybe we could get some coffee.
Maybe dinner?

Oh, right. Are you gonna date Ling?

It's none of your business.

Who are you trying to kid,
besides yourself?

Why wouldn't he want to date me?
He has a penis.

-[Elevator Bell Dings]
-Ally, we have to go.

-I want to talk to you when I--
-Since when do you care?

-Since now. Since--
-Get away from me.

[Squealing]

First of all, they introduced no evidence
of a binding contract.

Second, this filibuster he launched
into about giving back to the community?

-The community has no standing here.
-[Chair Scrapes Floor]

Your Honor, "filibuster"
is a senatorial term.

It's bad enough for me to endure the
scuzzy image of lawyer.

I refuse to sink deeper and be likened
to a member of Congress.

Mr. Cage.

Though I suppose I could be called worse,

like a Santa Claus killer.

One more word, I find for the defendant.

And then third, this idea of destroying
the myth of Santa.

It's not Newman's responsibility
to preserve this lie.

In fact, one could argue they'd be doing a
service to children by exposing the truth.

You want to know the number one
affliction of today's adults?

It's disillusionment.
Maybe if we could cure this--

this addiction to the dream
at an earlier stage, people--

Maybe it could spare them
pain down the road.

Sugarplums and family holidays,

Christmas stockings.

I think you're getting off track, counsel.

We all get off track. And that's my point.

Believing in-in fairy tales, believing--

At the end of the day,

life is just this big wall of reality
that we all crash into.

You know, maybe--

[Creaking]

Maybe kids should get a dose of it when
young.

Maybe it would give them
thicker skin, and--

My client isn't killing
Santa Claus, Your Honor.

He doesn't exist.

He doesn't.

Your Honor, could we take a break?

Miss Thomas, are you finished?

-She's finished.
-[Exhales]

You're probably sick of me
butting into your life, Georgia,

-but I am gonna do it one more time.
-I am not gonna--

You are gonna listen
to what I have to say!

Now, you kissed my father because you were
angry with Billy.

And Billy kissed Robin Jones
because he was angry at you.

We have two angry people who couldn't
possibly be so angry

if they still didn't love--

-I am not finished!
-Stop screaming!

[Sighs] Now, maybe you two
should break up.

But-But how can you not talk first?

How can you just reel off in anger...

-without at least--
-Talk to what?

Some Neanderthal who thinks my day should
get meaning from rubbing his feet?

-Georgia, I grew up with Billy.
-Yeah, I know.

-Would you let me finish?
-Stop screaming!

[Both Shouting At Once]

[Sighs] Billy grew up in a home
where his dad was king...

and his mother was a slave in the kitchen.

-It was a home-castle thing.
-So I'm supposed--

Don't make me scream.

Billy--He was a quarterback
in high school,

and all the girls were on the sidelines
as-as-as cheerleaders, including me.

I-I was a-a cheerleader.

-You?
-[Sputters] Please don't tell anybody.

My point: he was raised...

in a patriarchal world, wanting to grow up
and be like his dad.

And now he works in a firm where the women
are stronger than the men.

His wife makes as much money. He's not
even the provider. He's got no castle.

And I'm not trying to make excuses for him
being unfaithful.

All I am saying is stuff
is going on with him.

He-He-He bleached his head,
for God's sake, and--

And stuff is going on with you.
You kissed my father. You quit your job.

Stuff is going on, and it's
making you both angry.

And for you to just wave the white flag...

and let anger win without
trying, without talking--

[Inhales, Exhales]

[Exhales] It hasn't gone too far yet.

But for God's sake,
get in a room and talk it out.

You love each other way,
way too much to just give up.

[Sighs]

Related to my father?

Everybody's marriage is connected
to the marriage of their parents, Billy.

I know you're smart enough to know that.

Even now at the dumbest time of your life.

I thought my dumbest time
was when I left you.

-It was, and now you're exceeding it.
-[Laughs]

-[Scoffs] And it isn't that either.
-What is it? What?

You think this is about me needing to
believe in the forever of marriage again.

It's not that. It--
You'll be happy to know...

that I don't believe
in happily ever after anymore.

And--At least,
I don't think it's the norm.

And if it does come along,
it takes hard work.

And you two haven't worked.

And one thing you can't deny--

I know you, and I know you love her.

And this new Billy thing--

It's a cover.

Does she want to work?

Well--

[Inhales Deeply]

Ally thinks our mutual hate for each other
is something to build on.

Were you trying to hurt me,
kissing that woman?

Maybe. What about you?

Kissing Ally's father--that was about me?

Maybe.

You hate your life, Billy?

Maybe.

We've exchanged three "maybes."

This is progress, I guess.

Maybe.

I'm almost afraid to ask.

But tell me what you want.

I want you to put this back on.

-[Phone Rings]
-[Imitates Scream]

Billy Thomas's office.

-Can I tell him who's calling?
-No. He's not taking his calls.

-It's Robin Jones.
-Oh.

Hello. Yeah. [Chuckles]

Well, I-I'm sorry,
but Billy's unfortunately...

being relocated into
a witness protection program.

Oh, I know. It's quite tragic, but--

but as a result of a recent racketeering
trial, his life is in danger,

and several innocent people
have been killed already...

-just by having contact with him.
-[Line Clicks, Dial Tone]

Mm.

-You're wicked.
-Tell a friend.

What happened?

She said she can't bring herself
to take me back.

Sorry.

[Sighs] Me too.

If, um--

If there's anything I can do--

Yeah.

Ally.

The little girl had no need to save you.

You became exactly what you planned.

Someone who's out there
painting the world in...

beautiful colors.

Or at least trying to.

[Pager Beeps]

[Spectators Chattering]

There's no enforceable contract here.

The defendant has no duty
to the public either.

Plaintiff's motion for
a restraining order is denied.

I further order the petitioner to pay
the defendant's attorney fees.

I have to object to that,
Your Grinch--uh, Honor.

Object all you want, Mr. Cage.
This was a waste of my time.

I suppose you're behind now
on your shopping.

Thousand dollar fine. Anything else?

Just Merry Christmas.

And that I'd like to personally roast your
chestnuts on an open fire.

Two thousand. Keep going.

He's done, Your Grinch--Honor.

Adjourned.

-Well, Steven--
-Oh, I know you tried. Thank you.

Mr. Mallory? It was very important
that we win here...

so you'd appreciate this as a gesture
and not the function of a court order.

We would like to welcome you
back as our Santa Claus.

-What? Really?
-Really.

You may not have turned the judge,
Mr. Cage,

but you certainly persuaded me...

that Newman's Santa Claus
is something special,

and he should be more
than about demographics.

He should... be you.

Oh. Thank you.

Thank you.

It's a duct thing.

♪♪ [Up-tempo Blues Rock]

[Man] ♪ Don't tell me to go on a diet ♪

♪ Don't give me a pill ♪

♪ Just leave me alone
with my ice cream cone ♪

♪ And let me get my fill ♪

♪ I'm happy bein' fat ♪

♪ Fat, fat ♪

♪ I like the weight that I'm at ♪

[Ikettes] ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I'm happy bein' stout ♪

♪ Stout, stout ♪

♪ And if you don't like it
you can get on out ♪♪

They're havin' a big ol' party at the bar.
Our client is there.

-Let's go.
-No. No.

I'm gonna head home. Tired.

Ally said he's not there.

It's not that.

I am just really tired.

-Sure?
-Yeah.

Hey. How about you and me go someplace
else, just the two of us?

Celebrate our victory.

Thanks, Renee, but I am
just gonna go home.

Okay. If you change your mind--

I'll know where to find you.

Night.

Night.

[Door Closes]

♪ I've been alone ♪

♪ Too many nights ♪

♪ To think that you ♪

-♪ Could come back again ♪
-[Chattering]

-[Bell Jingles]
-♪ The fun times have gone ♪

♪ And left my sad home ♪

♪ And friends ♪

♪ Who once cared ♪

♪ Just walked out my door ♪

♪ Love has no pride ♪

♪ When I call out your name ♪

♪ Love has no pride ♪

♪ When there's no one to blame ♪

♪ But I'd give anything ♪

♪ To see you again ♪

♪ Yes, I'd give anything ♪

♪ To see you again ♪♪

[Woman] You stinker!