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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,344 Hey! 2 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:30,572 Welcome to Dreamland! Thank you for traveling Turbish Express! 3 00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:31,781 Oh, thank God. 4 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:35,452 This little piggy's had to wee-wee-wee all the way home. Stand aside. 5 00:00:36,369 --> 00:00:38,288 Oh, Turbish, how considerate of you. 6 00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:40,915 I'm not kneeling, I'm dying. 7 00:00:40,999 --> 00:00:42,542 - Wait a minute. - Oh! 8 00:00:42,625 --> 00:00:44,753 What the hell is that weird green smoke? 9 00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:47,714 Here. Stole 'em from Odval. 10 00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:52,343 Look, just beyond Mount Ominous! 11 00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:54,053 Hey, everybody stop worrying. 12 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:56,306 Probably just an army marching here to kill you all. 13 00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:58,767 I'm gonna go get a snack. Hey, do I look fat? 14 00:00:58,850 --> 00:00:59,684 'Cause you do. 15 00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:03,563 Yeah, you're gonna die soon. 16 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:07,358 But who'd want to attack Dreamland? 17 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,653 Besides Bentwood. Or Dankmire. Or Steamland. 18 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:13,364 Or those teenagers we ran over a while back. 19 00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:16,785 You have an impressive number of enemies for a girl your age. 20 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:19,913 Face it, Bean, neither one of us is destined to lead. 21 00:01:19,996 --> 00:01:22,123 You can't even keep track of your boots. 22 00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,334 I miss footwear. 23 00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:25,960 I may not be destined to lead... 24 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:28,505 - Or fit to lead. - Ooh! Or equipped to lead. 25 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:30,423 Or sociopathic enough to lead. 26 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,634 Girl, you are the wrong type of crazy. 27 00:01:32,717 --> 00:01:35,303 The last thing this kingdom needs is more crazy. 28 00:01:35,386 --> 00:01:37,764 Uh-oh. 29 00:01:38,473 --> 00:01:40,141 All right, Zøg has stopped… 30 00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:46,314 He's either fast asleep or sitting very still in a quiet rage. 31 00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:47,607 Okay, Abner. 32 00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:52,737 Now tiptoe in and put the roast poodle close enough to smell, but not too close. 33 00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:55,532 He's been known to eat whole cushions in his sleep. 34 00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,033 Then, get the hell out fast. 35 00:01:57,117 --> 00:02:01,371 Are you ready? You ready? Okay. You signed your will, right? Good. Go. 36 00:02:04,332 --> 00:02:05,542 Hey, wait a minute. 37 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:08,336 This ain't no poodle. It tastes like Shih Tzu. 38 00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:10,380 No! Not the catapult! 39 00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:19,681 Oh, Turbish? Would you step in here for a minute, please? 40 00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:29,816 You are back? Did you get Bentwood moneys and weapons? 41 00:02:29,899 --> 00:02:31,776 No, I screwed up royally. 42 00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,903 That should be family motto. 43 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:35,947 Wait, Oona, are you going somewhere? 44 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:37,740 Whoa! 45 00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:39,617 Whoa, again! 46 00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:42,078 It's time to shed skin and leave, Bean. 47 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:45,456 The longer I stay on land, the weaker I appear on sea. 48 00:02:45,540 --> 00:02:49,961 Piracy is very cutthroat business, is not even joke. Or isn't? 49 00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:51,880 But I can't do this without you! 50 00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:55,258 Elfo and Luci are all I have, and that is not a deep bench. 51 00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:58,887 If I do not go now, I cannot return when least expect. 52 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:01,973 A powerful Oona is more help to Bean in the future. 53 00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:04,517 But we might not have a future if you leave now. 54 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:07,353 Some kind of evil cloud cover is coming our way. 55 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:11,232 Don't be drama queen. That is my job. Flourish. 56 00:03:11,816 --> 00:03:12,816 Oona, no! 57 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:16,696 You'll know what to do. You are more capable than you don't think. 58 00:03:16,779 --> 00:03:18,364 Goodbye, crazy girl. 59 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,330 Ooh. Gecko style. 60 00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:27,498 Not gecko, newt! 61 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:31,085 This feels nice. 62 00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:35,340 Yeah. And once I sprinkle it with glitter, you'll look like a right badass. 63 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:39,510 Derek. Oh! And new angry fairy girl I like. 64 00:03:39,594 --> 00:03:42,055 Hey, Oona, how's it hanging? 65 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:45,725 Oh, by suction cups. Listen, I must vamoose for a while. 66 00:03:45,808 --> 00:03:48,645 Well, what about me? I don't wanna stay in Dreamland. 67 00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:51,940 Bean and Dad are just really emotionally draining. 68 00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:54,317 Plus, I'm not the cute one anymore. 69 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,945 Yeah, but a few scars and a tattoo of a naked me, 70 00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,279 you'll be my dream geezer. 71 00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:01,783 Goodbye, Derek. I love you. Don't follow me. 72 00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:05,620 Well, those are mixed messages. 73 00:04:06,704 --> 00:04:10,625 Mommy, wait! My needs outweigh your scorn! 74 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:14,504 Set sail! 75 00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:18,800 Ugh, I knew it. 76 00:04:18,883 --> 00:04:20,760 I swallowed a lot of sea water. 77 00:04:23,846 --> 00:04:26,349 Derek and Oona. I'm gonna miss her. 78 00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:30,561 Damn it! She took her drugs with her. 79 00:04:31,312 --> 00:04:34,482 Oh, no, the smoke's gone from the Badlands to the Even Worse Lands! 80 00:04:34,565 --> 00:04:38,111 It's probably those smartass teenagers getting high in the woods again. 81 00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:39,779 I'm glad we ran them over. 82 00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:43,449 We should start a gang and kick Elfo out. We can call it "Luci and Friend." 83 00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:46,160 Shut up, boys. I gotta warn my nutty dad. 84 00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:48,162 It'll either cure him or kill him. 85 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:52,292 Princess, you've returned. What news of Bentwood? 86 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:53,375 It's not good. 87 00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:56,212 Though, I did run into Grindl, an old friend of Sorcerio's. 88 00:04:56,296 --> 00:05:00,675 - You went to wizarding school together? - More of a wizarding community college. 89 00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:03,177 I flunked out because I was so overworked. 90 00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:06,764 It's hard being a wizard and a golf caddy at the same time. 91 00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:09,142 Anyway, I've got to talk to my dad. 92 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:10,101 Oh, ah… 93 00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:13,604 You do not wanna go in there, unless you're a fan of, like, dying. 94 00:05:14,605 --> 00:05:16,899 Perhaps you should put on some armor first. 95 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:19,152 Or an invisibility cloak. 96 00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:21,529 I had one here a minute ago. 97 00:05:21,612 --> 00:05:23,948 Oh, he's not gonna mess with daddy's little girl. 98 00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,992 Or her fists of lead. 99 00:05:27,368 --> 00:05:29,620 I'm bettin' on, like, the fat guy. 100 00:05:36,669 --> 00:05:38,296 Dad? 101 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,590 It's me. 102 00:05:41,215 --> 00:05:44,635 Your favorite kid? The drunken one? 103 00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:48,056 The big disappointment? The one who shot you? 104 00:05:50,224 --> 00:05:52,310 Ah, Beanie… 105 00:05:52,393 --> 00:05:54,395 It's okay, Dad. I'm here for you. 106 00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:57,565 Let's not say anything to anger El Porko Loco. 107 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,780 - Oh! Duck! - Duck! 108 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,865 Duck? Where? 109 00:06:09,535 --> 00:06:12,705 I was hiding under the throne since Tuesday. 110 00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:15,875 At least this side of his head is undamaged. 111 00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:20,296 Look at that glowering old fool. It's clear he's unfit to lead. 112 00:06:20,379 --> 00:06:22,256 You think? 113 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,841 Tiabeanie, you know that… 114 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:26,511 Women are not permitted to speak in the council chambers. 115 00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:27,512 It's the law. 116 00:06:27,595 --> 00:06:30,181 It's a stupid law. 117 00:06:30,264 --> 00:06:32,809 Why don't you just stop gasping and change the law? 118 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,977 Only the king can change the law. 119 00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:37,438 But right now, he can't even change himself. 120 00:06:37,522 --> 00:06:40,233 You heard me correctly. The king is bediapered. 121 00:06:41,275 --> 00:06:44,487 Stop harrumphing! We've got far more pressing matters! 122 00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:46,072 This is ridiculous! 123 00:06:46,155 --> 00:06:50,743 King Zøg is a danger to himself and, more important, to me. 124 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,162 He must be restrained and put away somewhere. 125 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,831 Then who will rule the kingdom? 126 00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:57,458 With Derek out at sea, no one. 127 00:06:57,542 --> 00:07:00,503 You're going to have a hard time keeping this quiet! 128 00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:03,464 I know a place we can keep Zøg that's completely soundproof. 129 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,508 It's where we put that zydeco band. 130 00:07:05,591 --> 00:07:10,054 That's right. Stan is talking, of course, of the Old Castle Mental Ward. 131 00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:13,724 But if we put Zøg down there, who'll have the guts to talk to him? 132 00:07:13,808 --> 00:07:16,227 Not me. Hospitals give me the willies. 133 00:07:16,310 --> 00:07:19,313 Yes, that place creeps even me out. 134 00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,607 And you know me, I love zydeco. 135 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:26,362 Well, the bigmouth princess has a soothing influence over him. 136 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,030 I suppose so. 137 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:31,868 She's probably the only one brave, or foolish, enough. 138 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:36,372 So now you come crawling back, begging me to talk to my dad, huh? 139 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:39,208 I'll do it if you come crawling and beg me. 140 00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:43,963 Oh, please. Oh, please. Oh, please. 141 00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:58,478 Hi, Dad, I brought you some dinner. 142 00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:00,480 With gravy? 143 00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:02,482 Listen, I need to talk to you. 144 00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:06,819 We have to start working together. But I need you to help me help you. 145 00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:11,824 Mmm… 146 00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:14,535 Yeah, it's your favorite soup. Melted butter. 147 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,120 Anyway, I thought you should know 148 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,706 that there's this thing headed toward Dreamland. 149 00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:23,503 We don't know if it's an army or a monster or a storm, or what. 150 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:24,962 It's green smoke. 151 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:27,757 Green smoke? 152 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:31,427 I know, but calm down. We can do this together. 153 00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:34,138 And by we, I mean, mostly you, 154 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,349 because, holy cow, being in charge is stressful. 155 00:08:36,432 --> 00:08:38,142 I totally get why you went insane. 156 00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:39,894 Yeah, this isn't helping, is it? 157 00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:41,187 More, please. 158 00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,065 Man, I know you know what to do. 159 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:45,483 - Somewhere inside you… - Mmm… 160 00:08:45,566 --> 00:08:48,694 …along with this food and those chess pieces you ate yesterday, 161 00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:49,987 it's in there, isn't it? 162 00:08:53,449 --> 00:08:54,909 Yeah, I know what you're saying. 163 00:08:54,992 --> 00:08:57,203 Wait, I know what you're saying. 164 00:08:57,286 --> 00:09:01,249 All these years of living with a grunting, emotionally remote dad has paid off. 165 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:02,542 I have an idea. 166 00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:07,380 Idiots… 167 00:09:11,842 --> 00:09:14,220 Dummy. Dummy. 168 00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:17,932 Okay, um, play me in with a little fanfare, Luci. 169 00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:22,228 All right. Shut up, everyone, quiet. 170 00:09:22,311 --> 00:09:25,439 The princess has a proclamation from King Zøg. 171 00:09:25,523 --> 00:09:27,817 Shut up, Elfo, I'm not done yet. 172 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:38,369 Thank you. That was a little number I call "Shut Up, Elfo" in E flat. Elfo? 173 00:09:38,452 --> 00:09:40,913 Okay. That's great. Please stop clapping. 174 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,124 That's enough. Let's stop now, please. 175 00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:45,793 Oh, still one person. Let's stop. 176 00:09:46,335 --> 00:09:48,004 - Turbish! - Sorry. 177 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:53,676 Ahem. Princess Tiabeanie brings a proclamation from King Zøg. 178 00:09:53,759 --> 00:09:57,597 By order of my dad, Dreamland must prepare for an attack. 179 00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:00,141 Furthermore, my father said, and I quote… 180 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,895 "Tell them jackasses that I said to do what you say." 181 00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,189 And by "you," he means me. 182 00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,357 Continuing… 183 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:12,278 "Those idiots are so dumb, they'll believe anything." 184 00:10:12,361 --> 00:10:15,197 I believe anything and I'm not an idiot. 185 00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:19,035 "Once the biggest idiot has spoken, wrap it up." 186 00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:21,871 Meeting adjourned. 187 00:10:23,164 --> 00:10:24,498 What just happened? 188 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:35,009 Zøg? Oh, Zøg? 189 00:10:35,801 --> 00:10:36,844 Zøg! 190 00:10:36,927 --> 00:10:39,639 Dag? Dagmar, is that you? 191 00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:42,516 Let me in, Zøg, and I'll let you out. 192 00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:47,605 Whoa, I'm finally hearing voices outside of my head. 193 00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:51,067 Dad, I brought you a little midnight snack. 194 00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:55,488 They didn't have much in the kitchen, but I got you some giant novelty crackers. 195 00:10:55,571 --> 00:10:58,783 Remember? You executed the guy who invented these? 196 00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:01,827 Oh, no! Dad? This is bad. 197 00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:04,497 Really bad. 198 00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:14,924 Who's up there? 199 00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:17,760 It's just Mertz. Only Mertz! 200 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:20,763 It's not just me! It's only Turbish! Ha! 201 00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:23,557 Lower the goddamn drawbridge right now 202 00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:26,143 or I'll come up there and strangle the both of you! 203 00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:30,731 Ha-ha, the only way up here is the secret door to your immediate left! 204 00:11:31,774 --> 00:11:32,983 Uh-oh. 205 00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:37,530 You're next, Turbish! 206 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:41,033 Ah! 207 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:47,665 Hey, guys! Did you see my dad? 208 00:11:47,748 --> 00:11:49,125 He went thataway. 209 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:51,001 Oops, I let go. 210 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,086 No! 211 00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:55,965 This place looks awful. Who's in charge here? 212 00:11:56,048 --> 00:11:57,234 Who the hell is that guy? 213 00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:58,634 Oh! 214 00:11:58,717 --> 00:11:59,844 The king! 215 00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:01,554 What're you doin' out here? 216 00:12:01,637 --> 00:12:06,517 You gotta be protectin' the castle against that green smoke that's coming. 217 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,728 Listen, buddy, you gotta sneak back in that castle. 218 00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:14,108 You can't be out here in the streets like this… All that riffraff… 219 00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:16,444 Have you gone crazy? 220 00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:18,946 Dad? Dad, where are you? 221 00:12:23,951 --> 00:12:27,163 Come on in. Water's nice and warm. 222 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:37,173 Why's everything gettin' dinkier? 223 00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,966 Ooh! 224 00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:41,177 Ooh! 225 00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:43,846 Ooh! 226 00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:45,181 Ooh! 227 00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:46,182 Ooh! 228 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:52,938 All right, I'll talk to you later. 229 00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:54,022 Ooh. 230 00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:57,401 - Hey, girlie! - Yow! 231 00:12:57,485 --> 00:13:00,112 Now with bubbles! 14 cents! 232 00:13:00,196 --> 00:13:01,280 Forget it. 233 00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:06,035 Have you ever sold a cup? 234 00:13:06,577 --> 00:13:08,287 13 cents! 235 00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:13,709 Ooh, ooh, ooh! 236 00:13:13,792 --> 00:13:14,792 Thanks! 237 00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,172 Oh, sorry! 238 00:13:25,262 --> 00:13:27,640 Oh, no, he's at Losers' Leap, 239 00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:29,391 right above Splatter Beach. 240 00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:40,152 Hi, Dad. Please don't run away. 241 00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:43,405 Come on, what's wrong? Talk to me. 242 00:13:44,156 --> 00:13:46,033 Now you're not talking at all? 243 00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:47,993 Not even a honk, for old time's sake? 244 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,373 All right. Come on, we can go get some crackers? 245 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,918 Dad, come on, say something. 246 00:13:58,128 --> 00:14:03,801 Let's go home. The kingdom needs you. I need you. I mostly need you to talk. 247 00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:18,691 You know, Dad, a lot of people think you're beyond repair. 248 00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:21,193 And now you're wearing your crown backwards, 249 00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:23,654 and your ass hanging out is a definite deal breaker. 250 00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:25,990 But I know that you can get better. 251 00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:27,491 And I'll be right by your side 252 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:28,784 until you do. 253 00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:30,619 Damn it! Dad! 254 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:35,082 Hi, Beanie! Over here! 255 00:14:35,165 --> 00:14:37,167 Come on, Beanie, over here! 256 00:14:37,251 --> 00:14:38,794 Wow, okay. 257 00:14:40,045 --> 00:14:42,673 Hello, there! You sound like someone I know. 258 00:14:42,756 --> 00:14:46,510 I don't think so. I ain't never been tossed in a drunk tank. 259 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:48,470 Hey! 260 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,848 I'm kiddin'. You look like you can take a joke. 261 00:14:50,931 --> 00:14:53,934 You look in the mirror every mornin', don't you? 262 00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:57,396 Dad, you're talking again! Let's go home and celebrate! 263 00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:04,194 Don't you see? He talks through me. But it ain't free. 264 00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:05,404 Tee hee hee. 265 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:08,657 Oh, I can't part with that one. That's Freckles. 266 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,327 He's a very naughty boy, but he's my favorite. 267 00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:13,370 He's practically my son, you know, 268 00:15:13,454 --> 00:15:15,831 though I wouldn't want to nurse that splintery wooden mouth! 269 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,416 He's a biter. 270 00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:21,045 Perhaps you'd be interested in this eyeless frog dummy? 271 00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:23,422 He comes with a lily pad arse glove. 272 00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:26,842 I think the insulting dummy really appeals to him. 273 00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:28,344 And my low self-esteem. 274 00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:31,805 Aw, I'm done razzin' ya, ya bucktoothed gin junkie. 275 00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:33,641 We'll take it in a bag, please. 276 00:15:37,227 --> 00:15:39,939 Any operating instructions or ominous warnings? 277 00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:43,150 Oh, my, no. Enjoy! No refunds! 278 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,155 - Bye, Freckles! - Hmm. 279 00:15:56,956 --> 00:16:01,627 I've heard every man's home is his castle, but this place is a dump. 280 00:16:01,710 --> 00:16:04,713 Yeah, well, the throne room isn't usually such a disaster, 281 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:08,008 but my dad has had kind of a rough few years. 282 00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:11,971 And Bunty only cleans on Tuesdays. Being king can drive you mad. 283 00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:14,056 Uh, you can say that again! 284 00:16:14,139 --> 00:16:16,058 And the way Zøg was tortured, 285 00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:19,144 it's no wonder he don't talk no more, yeah? 286 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:21,730 It's "doesn't talk no more." 287 00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,816 Wait, tortured? How? 288 00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:27,111 Zøg was left for dead with a hole in his chest. 289 00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:30,280 He was told his loving daughter was burnt at the stake. 290 00:16:30,364 --> 00:16:34,243 He was buried alive in a pine box. That's torture! 291 00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:37,496 I should know. Some of my best friends are pine boxes. 292 00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,083 Princess, the king has escaped from the mental ward 293 00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,334 and now, that nutjob is… 294 00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:46,171 sitting there with a charming little puppet on his lap. 295 00:16:46,255 --> 00:16:48,924 Is it wise to have Zøg untethered like that? 296 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:49,842 He's good. 297 00:16:49,925 --> 00:16:52,886 This dummy keeps him calm and allows him to express himself 298 00:16:52,970 --> 00:16:55,347 in ways that don't involve honking or punching. 299 00:16:55,431 --> 00:16:59,560 Oh, I see this castle already has a dummy. Am I right, dummy? 300 00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:02,688 Good one, Your Majesty. 301 00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:05,816 - The kingdom needs... - You think ignoring me makes me go away, 302 00:17:05,899 --> 00:17:08,485 but it just… makes me more annoying! 303 00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:10,279 Consider me schooled. 304 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:11,822 The kingdom needs to prepare 305 00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:14,867 for an incoming cloud of green smoke and we have a question. 306 00:17:14,950 --> 00:17:17,786 Oh? Which is? 307 00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:21,498 What do we do to prepare for an incoming cloud of green smoke? 308 00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:22,582 Hmm… 309 00:17:22,624 --> 00:17:26,962 You wanna know the most important thing in preparing for a potential attack? 310 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,130 Oh, yes. 311 00:17:28,213 --> 00:17:30,632 - Come closer. - Okay. 312 00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:31,842 Closer. 313 00:17:31,925 --> 00:17:32,801 Oh? 314 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,803 - Closer. - Hmm? 315 00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,639 See, you gotta watch out for my hand! 316 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:39,099 Ow! 317 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:40,601 Look at it! It left an imprint! 318 00:17:40,684 --> 00:17:43,520 Uh, I think he means we have to be vigilant. 319 00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:48,942 That big wall is not gonna stop the smoke. 320 00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:50,736 Get the nets, idiots! 321 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:55,199 Hey, watch it. That ladder's my uncle. 322 00:17:55,282 --> 00:17:59,828 Even more important than a good defense is a good offense. 323 00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:01,371 You heard him. We need weapons. 324 00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:03,707 We need bravery. We need a brilliant strategy. 325 00:18:03,791 --> 00:18:05,959 - Is hiding a weapon? - No. 326 00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:08,253 - Is hiding bravery? - No. 327 00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:10,506 Is hiding a brilliant strategy? 328 00:18:10,589 --> 00:18:12,007 Well, yes. 329 00:18:15,594 --> 00:18:18,097 Sergeant Touchy, feel out where we're vulnerable. 330 00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:19,264 Hmm… 331 00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:20,599 Yes, yes… 332 00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:24,228 You're afraid to let people in and you hide behind sarcasm. 333 00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:27,022 I meant our battle plan, but good to know. 334 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:29,191 Jenkins, work on your issues. 335 00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:33,654 There's one last thing you gotta do to be ready. 336 00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:34,780 And that is? 337 00:18:34,863 --> 00:18:38,075 You have to come closer 'cause I don't want people to panic. 338 00:18:38,158 --> 00:18:39,993 - Yes? - Come closer! 339 00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:44,581 Oh, no, I'm not falling for that one again. You're going to hit me. 340 00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:46,708 I'm not gonna hit you, I promise! 341 00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,043 - You promise? - Yeah! 342 00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:49,253 - You really do? - Uh-huh. 343 00:18:49,336 --> 00:18:51,547 No foolin' now, this is a serious situation. 344 00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,632 - You got it. - All right, then. 345 00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:56,468 - You gotta come closer, though. - All right. 346 00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:59,054 - Closer. - Hmm. 347 00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:02,015 You really wanna know what's important in a siege? 348 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:03,600 Yes, I do. 349 00:19:03,684 --> 00:19:05,018 Closer, then. 350 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:08,313 You gotta make sure people don't go hungry! 351 00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:09,523 Ow! 352 00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:11,650 Oh, ow! Ow! Ow! 353 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,403 Oh, you promised! 354 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,446 Yeah, I promised I wasn't gonna hit ya. 355 00:19:16,530 --> 00:19:19,950 That's why I bit ya. Next time, I might slit ya. Yeah. 356 00:19:20,033 --> 00:19:22,327 We better stock up on food and beverages. 357 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:30,210 We've brought regular gumballs, and suicide gumballs, 358 00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:32,671 in case things take a turn for the worse. 359 00:19:32,754 --> 00:19:34,590 Okay, put it over there. 360 00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:40,721 Hmm… 361 00:19:44,766 --> 00:19:46,101 Ew, grape. 362 00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:47,936 Ew, no, thank you. 363 00:19:49,104 --> 00:19:52,983 Preparations seem to be proceeding beyond our wildest fantasies, sire. 364 00:19:53,066 --> 00:19:55,235 And you oughta see this guy's fantasies! 365 00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:57,863 Talk about being sick and depraved! 366 00:19:57,946 --> 00:20:01,408 That's all he does! Talk about being sick and depraved. 367 00:20:01,491 --> 00:20:04,453 Are you finished? Because we're due to be slaughtered. 368 00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:08,790 We're working well together getting the kingdom prepared. 369 00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:12,252 I feel really optimistic about the oncoming bloodbath. 370 00:20:13,795 --> 00:20:14,795 Good night, Dad. 371 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:18,884 Good night, Bean. 372 00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:25,015 From now on, call me Freckles. 373 00:20:25,098 --> 00:20:27,017 So… 374 00:20:27,100 --> 00:20:30,103 this isn't gonna get more normal any time soon, is it? 375 00:20:30,187 --> 00:20:31,647 What do you think? 376 00:20:49,164 --> 00:20:50,707 All right, rummies. 377 00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:55,003 You don't have to die at home, but you can't die here. Now beat it! 378 00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:02,844 Hey, do you guys think I should wean my dad off his emotional support dummy? 379 00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:05,264 And if I do, will he still be able to run the kingdom? 380 00:21:05,347 --> 00:21:07,557 Face it. You're the one running the kingdom. 381 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:11,687 All that dummy does is tell stale, wooden jokes that hurt people's feelings. 382 00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:14,022 Bean, you're the one in charge. 383 00:21:14,106 --> 00:21:15,899 - Quiet, mule. Hyah! - Ah! 384 00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:20,737 Hmm, there's only one way to find out who's really in control. 385 00:21:40,257 --> 00:21:42,092 Sweet dreams, Freckles. 386 00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:58,025 Whoa! 387 00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,776 Huh. 388 00:22:03,071 --> 00:22:04,071 Whoa! 389 00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:14,291 Oh. 390 00:22:18,253 --> 00:22:21,006 Dad, it's 3:00 a.m. and you're not in your bed. 391 00:22:21,089 --> 00:22:22,257 Or in the kitchen. 392 00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:24,843 Were you in my bedroom just now? 393 00:22:25,552 --> 00:22:27,679 Dad, what'd you do with Freckles? 394 00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,724 Hello, Bean. Did you miss me? 395 00:22:30,807 --> 00:22:31,683 Whoa! 396 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:33,268 Dad, this ain't good. 397 00:22:33,351 --> 00:22:36,063 But if you could just keep trying, I know you can get better. 398 00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:38,857 That's not possible. I mean, look at me. 399 00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:41,359 No, look at me. 400 00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:44,321 I'm just a flabby husk of a man. 401 00:22:44,404 --> 00:22:46,948 I can't barely honk no more. 402 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:51,328 See? I would've loved to be the hero of the story, 403 00:22:51,411 --> 00:22:55,665 but now, I can't even hold a spoon. I'm afraid of 'em now. 404 00:22:55,749 --> 00:22:59,586 Remember when I gave myself all them genius awards? 405 00:22:59,669 --> 00:23:02,422 I'm glad those awards ain't around to see this. 406 00:23:03,256 --> 00:23:06,176 Even you know I'm already gone, Beanie. 407 00:23:06,259 --> 00:23:09,471 You can't be gone, Dad. I need you. Here. 408 00:23:09,554 --> 00:23:13,475 And I need you. Here! You can do this, Beanie. 409 00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:16,937 Do what? Dad, no, please don't ask me this. 410 00:23:17,020 --> 00:23:21,608 If I don't go away now, I may never be able to come back. 411 00:23:21,691 --> 00:23:23,401 But who will take care of the kingdom? 412 00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:26,071 Dad, I can't… I can't do it on my own. 413 00:23:26,154 --> 00:23:29,074 Oh, Beanie, you already are. 414 00:23:29,157 --> 00:23:31,743 You've been doin' it this whole time. 415 00:23:34,663 --> 00:23:36,915 Thanks for being my dad, okay? 416 00:23:36,998 --> 00:23:39,167 I've had a lot of people leave me in my life, 417 00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:42,546 but I've never ever ever not had you before. 418 00:23:42,629 --> 00:23:46,174 Your stupid, rude, yelling face was always there. 419 00:23:46,258 --> 00:23:47,717 So come back, okay? 420 00:23:48,301 --> 00:23:50,554 Be a good queenie, Beanie. 421 00:23:50,637 --> 00:23:53,557 For me. And for me. 422 00:23:54,057 --> 00:23:55,934 And for the kingdom. 423 00:23:56,017 --> 00:23:57,811 What say you, Princess? 424 00:23:59,563 --> 00:24:01,815 My dad needs to go away for a while. 425 00:24:12,742 --> 00:24:14,202 It's time to go, Dad. 426 00:24:54,534 --> 00:24:57,287 - Ah! - Hi, I'm Chazzzzz. 427 00:24:57,370 --> 00:25:01,708 I'll be your donkey cart driver and tour guide for the next 23 hours. 428 00:25:01,791 --> 00:25:04,377 I warn you, the ride may get a little bumpy. 429 00:25:04,461 --> 00:25:09,466 For your own safety, keep your arms and legs inside the wagon at all times. 430 00:25:09,549 --> 00:25:10,967 I have a machete. 431 00:25:11,051 --> 00:25:12,552 Ah! 432 00:25:22,062 --> 00:25:23,980 Our Queen. 32741

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