All language subtitles for An.idiot.abroad.S01E04.aAF.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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The seven wonders of the world...
Christ the redeemer.

The Taj Mahal.

The great pyramids.

Truly man's greatest achievements.

But there's one man who
sees them differently.

A building like that should be
going, "What's been going on?"

Karl Pilkington.

I don't know the
politically correct term.

Close your mouth.

Moron.

I think he is a round,
empty-headed, chimp-like moron.

And he's a friend.

You're not meant to laugh.

You're meant to go, "Ooh."

He's a typical little englander,
and he doesn't like

going out of his comfort zone.

I just think that it'd be amazing
to send him around the world.

Me eyes have never been so busy.

There's always something
there going, "Look at me."

So you're like that so your neck...
By the end of today,

me neck will be well
and truly worn out.

What we'd like to see is him experience
other cultures...

...And see if in any way we can
change his outlook on the world.

It's like something make an ornament
of sort of next to the telly.

I've been to many exotic places.

I genuinely think travel
broadens the mind.

I want him to hate it.

Oh.

I want him to hate every minute
of it for my own amusement.

Nothing is funnier than Karl in
a corner being poked by stick.

I am that stick.

And now I have the might
of sky behind me.

Shit! Shit!

This is one of the funniest, most
expensive practical jokes I've ever done.

And it's gonna be great.

Just let me go! Jesus.
No.

Sync by honeybunny
Corrected by www.MY-SUBS.com
www.MY-SUBS.Com

Next up, Karl...

Chichen Itza in Mexico.

Never heard of it.

No, I know you'll think it
looks a little like a pyramid.

Yeah.

Not just about the
building, though, is it?

Mexico very different to Egypt.

Completely different country on a different
continent thousands of miles away.

Used, of course, for human
sacrifice back in the day.

Yeah, the death thing is good.

Right.

So as opposed to celebrating life and
culture, you want to go around...

Well, it's more relevant
to me than this, isn't it?

A pyramid isn't for me, is it?

I'm not gonna use a pyramid,
but I am gonna die.

But it's not about death.

And the great thing is, Karl,
that in a lot of these

countries, it's a very
high murder rate.

Yeah.

So there's a strong chance that you're
one of the group could get killed.

If you've got a building for it...
It's equivalent of, like,

death hill in that if you've got
something cold, dark in an area,

it encourages it.

Knock it down and say,
"Don't do that anymore.

It's bad."

Well, there you go.

Knock it down.

Well, anyway, you're going.

Get your bags, your passport.

We've got to get you
to the airport.

Packing again.

Um... This time for Mexico.

I mean, it's the same
clothes, really.

It doesn't matter where I'm going.

I've got the same pants,
I've got the same t-shirts.

Um, maybe a different
flavor crisps.

What crisps have you got?

Uh, monster munch pickled onion.

Uh, it's good, soft
things like this.

What do you like in
that monster munch?

It's just a bit... there's something
about them that cheers you up.

Not only are they tasty...
You're just having a little

monster talk out
when you're fed up.

You have one new message.

Hey, Karl.

How are you doing?

Karlos?

How are you doing, man?

I'm all right, yeah.

Call me Karlos, yeah.

That's all right.

Let's go, man.

What's up in there, huh?

What's all this?

Some [Bleep] Crashed me, man.

Some [Bleep] Crashed you.

Yeah.

Is this yours? Huh? This dog?

Yes.

That's yours?

Yeah, this is Jack.

Oh.

Normal.

Is this a little chihuahua?

Yes.

Oh.

Que pasa, Jack.

When you first get them,
they're tiny, aren't they?

Uh-huh.

And a friend of me mum had one,
sat on the sea front... yeah.

A seagull came down, took it away.

Uh-huh?

A seagull... bird.

Yes.

Came down, grabbed it, took it
out to see, never saw it again.

No

No

, man.

I know.

Today is the day of the...
Jesus Christ die.

Let me show you the celebration.

It's a good celebration, man...
With a lot of romance and

Mexican womans and...
Well, quite funny, man.

I've got a girlfriend.

Nice bod?

What?

Nice bod?

Smart?

Nice bod?

Nice body?

Yeah.

She used to have.

Yeah?

But, you know, I'm
not having a go.

I used to look better than this.

So I just think, you know, we both
sort of lost out a little bit.

Good

Um...

Yeah, they're fine.

I mean... it's okay.

I mean, you know, I've never...
It's good to have a good...

A good body, you know?

Ohh.

Okay, Karlitos.

You want to take this street, you
know, along the stone quarries.

This one here?

Yeah, the big celebration
is over there.

See you later, Edgar.

Ciao.

It seems to be a big deal here... easter,
whereas at home,

it's just... you know, "Sir,
sir, do you have a chocolate

egg?," and he was like, "What?"

He had no idea.

They don't have
chocolate eggs here.

I mean, for me, that's
what easter is.

Take the eggs away, it's...
You know, what I mean?

It's Friday.

He fell over.

I think it's part of the story.

Somebody help him.

Do you know the Bible story?

No, I don't know, but surely he
wouldn't want someone helping

him, would he?

That's like saying, "Come on.

I want to see you get crucified."

Say, "Put it down.

Don't be helping me."

It's the one time in your life
where you don't want help.

They're coming through.

He's got a rush job.

Just what you want, isn't it?

Imagine that.

Jesus being taken.

You know, your life's gonna end,
you got someone with a recorder.

It's the worst sound
going, isn't it?

It's the worst instrument, that.

I'd say, "Do it here."

Bloody hell.

I thought it was a proper
accident before when he was

walking up and he fell over.

I thought it was a proper
trip, and it was.

He's obviously... he's leg locked.

But it does sort of ruin the
whole sort of Jesus-type

image when, you know, someone from St.
John's ambulance is

sticking salve on his knee.

You think they're gonna nail him?

Not after.

Because they were so concerned
about his knee, putting salve

on and stuff on it.

I don't they'd do that and say,
"All right, give us your hands."

It'd be a bit, uh... be a
bit extreme, wouldn't it?

They used to do it.

Until 1984, they used
to do it with nails.

Here?

Yeah.

Well, what sort of a nail
do you use for that?

I always struggle.

D.I.Y.

You just never... you
never get it right.

I do not know what sort
would go through... oh.

Obviously, you know, all of this
means a lot to these people,

doesn't it?

Whereas, I've never seen
anything like this at home,

you know... at home, really.

It's a sort of a... it's got
religion linked to it, but,

really, it's just the time of
the year for greedy people to

feel like they're
doing a bit of good.

"Oh, I love Jesus, mate.

You got any eggs?"

There wasn't an egg
even involved in it.

I don't know the connection
between Jesus and an egg.

'Cause he can't be happy
with that, can he?

If he was his cross on his last
breath and someone said, "We're

gonna remember you, Jesus."

And it was like, "Great.

What are you gonna do?"

"We're gonna have egg."

"What? Ugh."

Do you know what I mean?

You wouldn't be chuffed with that.

It's not like this at
home, is it... easter?

You know, my easter weekend,
I'm normally stuck watching

James Bond or, you know, just
nipping out... stuff like

that, but...
Somehow I can't see that

somehow I can't see that
happening here.

Since I've been here, you know, I've sort
of been thinking about things that I

know about Mexico, which isn't
that much, but then I just

remember seeing a Mexican
jumping bean on "Sesame Street"

when I was a kid.

Mexican jumping beans.

What are you laughing at?

I told me mum about them, and she
was like, "What are you on about?"

She ended up buying me
some marbles instead.

I've always wanted to
see one in real life.

Mexican jumping beans.

Mexican jumping beans.

Have you heard of them?

No.

It's like a bean...
and it jumps about.

Bump-bump, bump-ba-bump.

I don't know if you're
meant to eat them.

I don't know if you get them
in a food shop or pet shop.

Like a little bean,
pop it in your hand.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch.

Probably be like Heinz beans.

You can get them anywhere at home.

Know Heinz beans?

You got no brakes.

Sí.

How do you brake?

Sí.

Shhh! Brake.

Sí.

How?

Sí.

No brake.

Sí.

You might be Mexicans.

You need brakes it's not safe.

Sí.

Brake.

Oh.

No, I didn't pack
anything like that, no.

Wrestling?

What's that got to do
with the seven wonders?

I'm here to see a wonder.

I've had enough practice.

I mean, you know.

You've sort of had me in that lock, so...
I know.

That's the spirit.

That's the spirit.

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

I'll see you later.

All right.

Oh, yeah.

Are you Sandy?

Hello.

Bloody hell.

I'm not doing it in
front of a crowd, am I?

I'm just getting some training?

Yeah, some training. Yeah.

It's good, isn't it?

I'm just about to go and
wrestle with the shocker.

I told Susan about it, right?

I said, "Don't be hassling me.

I'm about to go wrestling."

She sent me a text, "Be careful.

How do you use the DVD player?"

That's... that's good, isn't it?

She's not that worried.

Hey!

I should introduce you.

Nice to meet you, Karlitos.

Karl.

How are you doing?

You're shocker.

I'm shocker.

Very pleased to meet you.

Let me show you around.

You're a lot bigger
than I thought.

I thought they would have given me
a little fellow to sort of try out with.

Oh, you want a little fellow?

How big? This big?

Just about like that.

Come here, boy.

Watch.

Ugh!

Ughh!

Ugh!

Aah!

Ohh!

Ugh!

I know it's Ricky that set it up,
and it's folly, you know,

to him, but this is, like,
how accidents happen.

It's like the star of casualty.

You watch that programme,
everyone's having fun,

it's a party or something.
People are going on a holiday on a bus.

And you know it's all gonna go wrong.

And that's how this feels.

It feels like the star of casualty.

It was just somebody who chokes around.

That could be me out there.

I mean, does he know the full story
that I'm here to see the seven wonders?

I didn't come here to be trained as a...
No, he doesn't know that.

Yeah, well, it's...
You should tell him, really.

Looks better on you.

Wow.

You look just like a wrestler.

Hey, come on.

Squat and then jump, kick your legs...
Go like that?

Yeah, go ahead.

That's all right.

Whoa!

Good job!

Really?

You almost got it.

Okay, we're gonna start
with training of wrestling.

Are you ready?

Now what have I done there?

You'll be okay
in a couple of days.

Come on.

Ready?

You got to follow the lead, okay?

There you go.

See how easy that was?

Okay?

Can I be you in that one?

Come on, you

Oh, missed the thing.

Go.

Grab the ropes.

Oh,

Good job.

Hold on.

Don't just...
Oh, I'm going to be sick.

Wait a minute.

You're sick?

I'm sick.

Going to throw up?

Like this.

Is it normal to feel, like, sick?

Ugh!

Oh, yeah.

Do you give up?

Yeah.

Ohh.

Come on, Karl.

Shocker, I can't.

You see me shaking.

That doesn't do me confidence
any good, really, because...

I thought I was fitter than that.

What do you think Suzanne
would say if she saw you now?

I'm not wanting to watch this one.

Whatever night this goes on, I'm gonna
take her out for something to eat.

"I want to stay in and watch."

"No, we're going out."

Somebody said hang out, so, uh, I don't
know what I'm going to be doing.

Rick and Steve probably
at home doing nothing.

They haven't called up yet and
given any instructions, so I'm

just gonna have a wander
about, see what's going on.

Oh, look here.

Look at the newspapers.

Normally we've got Cheryl Cole
on the front of our newspapers.

Yet, here, look.

Fella sort of done in.

Look at that.

They're not scared of death
here in Mexico, are they?

They're not worried about it.

I mean, our graveyards don't
look like this, do they?

This looks like they have
a holiday camp in a way with

all the different colors and
everything... a little sort of

beach like you get in Kent.

Oh, this is the thing we're seeing,
isn't it... the Chichen... Chichen Itza.

I mean, I've heard about
this day of the dead that they do.

Yeah.

Everyone basically has a party
to celebrate the dead people.

We don't do that.

We find it all a bit
morbid, don't we, death?

We don't like to talk about it.

Certainly don't have
a day dedicated to it.

But then we waste days, you know,
dedicated to, like pancake Tuesday.

Why have we got
a day for pancakes?

This sort of thing,
me dad would do that.

He built a barbecue
a bit like this.

A little grill bit in there.

That was a funnel.

All right, mate.
How's it going?

It's all right, you know.

I'm not having a bad time here.

Which is an odd thing to say
'cause it was wrestling yesterday.

Um... it depends I mean, if he had hit
badly, I could come across like I'm weak.

But, uh, I think I got
a few good moves in there.

What do you mean?

What do you mean they want... what
do you mean about the banning bit?

I've been here now a couple of
days, and I've already seen

that they're not really bothered
about health and safety.

So the fact that there's
something that they are worried

about the health and safety of means
that it must be pretty mental.

I'm just waiting here for...
For Carlos, isn't it?

Chicken with a gun.

Hello, mate.

Carlos.

How are you doing?

You all right?

I'm glad, mate.

What are they doing?

That's a... it's kind of a...
A whistle we always do.

No, I wasn't that shocked
with the whistle.

It was the 30-foot frog
that they were carrying.

Oh, yeah.

It's called the Judas.

We use things we don't
like and we burn them.

They try to stop it because
it's a bit dangerous.

What sort of...Danger?

Uh... get an injury,
but not, like, death.

But it's... there's a lot of injuries.

Look.

He's a master craftsman.

Yeah?

He makes fireworks.

What, just on the
street like this?

Yeah.

Are these safe?

Yeah.

Look at him.

Has he lost an eye
from doing this?

Yeah.

One of these fireworks, you
know, they turn on and then

go. Like a
rocket, and they hit you.

He got hit in the eye.

Who's taking the
security measures?

I haven't seen anyone
who looks official.

I've seen a fellow with one eye who's
in charge of making the fireworks.

Yeah, the... that's why the
government tried to ban it.

But... but it would help the situation
if they just got a fellow with two eyes.

Do you know what I mean?

Maybe the government would say,
"Well, at least they're trying

to make it safer."

But I don't... I mean, respect
to the man for making a living

out of it, but I don't think
he's the best man for the job.

This is classico Torito.

Yeah?

This one is going to burn.

Mental.

It's not [Bleep] Mental.

You'll see it.

You'll enjoy it, mate.

So all this is gunpowder, yeah?

Yeah.

I'm not getting under that.

You're not getting
under that, mate.

Well, Jamie's in charge of health and
safety, yet he's [Bleep] Back, you see.

So I don't know what I'm
meant to be doing here.

I'm meant to be over there?

Is that a safe place?

It's a safe place, mate.

Let's go.

Where are we going?!

Behind the car!

Behind the car!

Quick! Behind the car!

Whoo-hoo-hoo-ha!

Get down! Get down!

Get down, man!

Whoo-hoo-hoo-ha!

Whoo!

Look, mate!

What?

I just got burned.

Where are we going?

Where's your house?

House... it's over there.

Let's go.

Ohh!

Down! Down that street!

Whoo-hoo-hoo-ha!

Come on, mate.

Go on, man!

Go on. I'll follow you.

Where's Carlos?!

Oh.

Come on, mate.

Get in.

Whoo-hoo.

Whoo!

Well, what's this got
to do with Jesus?

'Cause it's easter Sunday.

Yeah.

There's no hens going on.

There's no chocolate eggs.

I mean, I haven't read the
Bible, but I don't remember

anyone mentioning setting fire to a
cow with a load of fireworks on it.

The thing is, we burn things, and we think
that it's Judas iscariot, you know?

It's like vengeance, you know?

You betray Jesus Christ,
so you're going to burn.

I wasn't getting that from that.

I just saw lunatics.

♪ Let's go work it out ♪

Whoo-hoo!

Steve sent me a text sort of
saying, "Right, you know, stop

all your messing about,"
which has been out of order.

He's the one who
sorted all this out.

He said, "You know, you're
not there for messing about.

You're meant to be
seeing the wonder."

So I'm going to, uh, make my
way over that way today...

Stop off on the way and
meet and meet some charros.

Didn't know what they were.

He said they're, uh,
Mexican cowboys.

Ricky sort of said to Steve to
tell me to try a sombrero on.

That was the ninth
thing he wanted.

Not sort of broadening your mind of
meeting local people, trying local food.

He just wants me to wear a hat.

Close your mouth.

Hey!

It's not my sort of thing, really...
You know, cowboys and not.

I've never been into it as a kid
or anything, but I'll have a look.

Whoa.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

They're meant to be like proper
men, though, aren't they?

If I went home, and he said, "Oh,
what are you doing these days?"

"Oh, I've got into horses."

They'd go, "What's... what's...
Is he an idiot."

Do you know what I mean?

It's not a very manly
thing to do at home.

Turn! Turn!

Turn!

But for some reason when you think
of cowboys, you do think manliness.

But I think maybe it's
losing it a little bit now.

Maybe cowboys aren't like
that since... you know, since

"Brokeback Mountain" and
the village people.

There's been little things in
the way of cowboys, that's sort

of ruining the
reputation a little bit.

John Wayne... you know,
didn't he turn out to be gay?

They will bring something to
toughen you up a little bit.

And then you will ride the bull.

I can't get on a bull.

I shouldn't be getting on a bull.

We've got loads of horses here
why are we messing about on an

animal that you don't ride?

They haven't got have
brains, have they?

They'll just run riot.

I don't want to do it.

We'll have just a little
drink of tequila to smoothen

your muscles and give you
a little bit of strength.

One kind of tequila, they put
worms in it, and it's a very

nice thing to offer the
worm to the guest.

What is wrong with you people?

May we split?

Just [Bleep] About on
bulls, drinking worms.

I've been wrestling.

I've only been here
about three days.

It's like everyone's daring each
other to do something stupid.

Get on a cow, get on a bull.

Yeah, let's have a wrestle.

Eat a worm!

Do you know what I mean?

It's just it's never-ending.

It's just...
Actually, for us, this is normal, man.

I know, but that's
what's frightening.

Do you chew or do
you just swallow?

Of course you chew and you try to
figure out the flavor and everything.

All right. There you go.

Swallow it!

It's still in there!

Oh, gosh.

Oh.

Man.

I daren't bend over
'cause I'm gonna be sick.

Right, okay.

Let's jump inside.

Gracias.

Can I see him?

Eh, I've caught you
out, haven't I?

Get him pissed off,
stick him on a bull.

If anything happens, you just...
See, this isn't helping, Eugene.

You know, seeing I've got to
suddenly jump out of the way.

Look. Look, look, look.

Hey, come on!

I'm not going out there.

No, seriously.

Jamie, I can't.

There's no way.

Look.

I can't!

Keep it short.

What's that he's got?

It's for handling the...
Right. Exactly.

No, no!

Out of the way.

Hey!

No, no, no, no!

No!

Just let me go!

No.

Aah!

What was that?

Stop winding me up, now.

Seriously, right?

Enough's enough.

Come on.

Fuck no... no chance.

Karl.
Forget it.

Come back, man.
Karl.

It's your turn.
No.

Karl.
No, leave it.

Seriously... I've ridden a horse,
I've had a drink, I've eaten a worm.

Karl, come back.

No.

A lot of bees here.

Is anywhere safe?

Do you sell... do you sell
Mexican jumping beans?

Mexican jumping beans?

No.

No?

Do you know, uh...
Mexican jumping beans?

No?

I don't understand why
you've never heard of him.

No.

One of the best things
to come out of Mexico.

Little bean.

You all sit around
here, nothing to do.

You'd love these things.

Just pop them on the
floor, jump about.

You seen that?

What is it?

It's the thing, isn't it?

It's the, uh...
Chichen Itza that we're seeing.

I mean, it's meant to be a place
that, you know, the used to

sacrifice people and all that, but
they've stuck it on the plate.

You have one new message.

Little change of plan there.

I thought I was gonna be seeing
the wonder today, but Rick and

Steve have called up.

So forget that.

Um, we're gonna be spending the
afternoon in a little village

with some mayan people.

So, it should be all right.

You know, after all the hassle
on the... you know, the horses

with the charros and that, it
should be a nice little relaxing

afternoon, really.

Luis?

Hola!

Eh, how you doing?

Fine, thanks. And you?

I'm Karl.

Nice to meet you, Karl.

Good to see you.

Who's this?

He's my Uncle... José.

That's your Uncle... José.

José.

José.

Nice to see you, José.

The name of the small
village is Yashuna.

Yashuna has around 500 people.

It's a quiet place.

It's not like a big city.

Because we don't have a lot
of things to do here.

No, there's nothing to do
here, is there, really.

No, nothing.

It's just working in the
cornfield, and then you go back

to your home.

Has he had a good day?

Is he happy?

Uh...

Yes.

He say yes.

When did he last have a bad day?

Uh...

Never.

Never.

He's happy every day.

He looks happy.

He's got a happy face.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

He's constantly smiling.

Everyone just stood around.

Look, there's a fellow there just
playing with a bit of rubber.

Now, what...
It can't be good for you, this, can it?

That fellow who was smiling,
has he ever seen other life?

Has ever been to, say...?

No. Just here in this little
town, living here in the little

house.

But why?

He doesn't know what he's
missing, though, does he?

Anyway, he said, uh, "Let's go
knock down a wasp's nest."

I said, "Do what?"

He said, "Yeah, we knocked
down the wasp's nest and get

all the, uh... get
the larva from it.

What do you do with that?

We eat it.

Larva... wasp larva.

Yes.

You eat wasp larva?

Yeah.

There's the wasp nest.

Oh, yeah.

Uh...

Use that for wasps?

They're all coming out.

Oh!

This is stupid.

Seriously, how good could
a larva egg taste?

Is it worth it?

I got one in my...
Move your hand, move your hand.

Oh!

There it is.

Ow.

Don't run away, okay?

Just look-it.

No nothing.

These little larvas... wasp
larvas, they still alive,

and you can eat them like this.

Went in their house... tiny place.

Tight in here, isn't it?

And a woman who was doing the
cooking, she made some, um,

tortillas, and they got the
larva out of the wasp nest.

And it's all right.

We stuck them in some
chilies and stuff.

That's really hot.

I can't eat that.

You can hardly taste them.

The chilies are the more powerful.

Well, don't put them in, then.

If it's the chilies that's nice and the
sauce, don't bother with the grubs.

Uhh!

That's really hot.

Uh, and then I thought I'd give
them some... some, you know,

new experience.

What's that?

A bit of monster munch.

Ahh.

Pop it in your mouth.

You like that?

It's good, isn't it?

Good.

When I think Luis has had stuff
like that, you don't get

that fat from wasp larva.

I mean, he had a belly on him.

And he kept saying, "Oh, no.

It's the wasps that makes
you big and strong."

How many are you eating?

Because they're only that big, and
there's not much fat in them.

Well, the Uncle... you could
tell he was kind of like,

"Oh, this is all right, this."

I think he enjoyed it.

So I'm happy about that.

I gave him a new experience
there I think...

And just was open and get a
taste of something new and

think, "You know what?

I might leave this little
village and go into town and

get some crisps."

Anyway, off to see the wonder
that they built tomorrow.

I just saw something.

What's that?

Is someone pumping a tire up?

Every wonder that I've been
to so far, I've been whinging

a lot, so I'm gonna try and
change me attitude on this one

'cause that's what this
trip's been about, really.

I've been eating stuff all sorts of
stuff that I wouldn't normally eat.

You know, I've been doing things
that I wouldn't normally do.

So, I'm gonna try to go there with
the idea that I'm gonna love it.

Is this it?

Hello?

Yeah, I'm filming now.

I'm at the actual wonder.

I told you what to do.

Just get the... you get the
scart lead that's coming out

of the back of the DVD player.

Yeah, and just stick that
in the back of the telly.

There's two holes.

Use the first one.

Yeah, it looks all right.

Yeah, it's just a big pyramid.

Right.

Well, all you've got to do is
hit that a/v button on the

remote control and
it will come up.

All right.

Talk to you later.

Iha!

Welcome to Chichen Itza, home
to one of the most amazing and

advanced cultures in
history, the Mayans.

I'm Gabriella, and I
will be your host.

Buenos días, Gabriella.

Yes, the Maya were amazing.

Archaeologists have uncovered
evidence that point to this

site as once being covered
in human skulls.

I mean, we only started
listening, and straightaway,

it's, like, violence.

It's just what they used to do
with all, like, these dead

heads... stick the skulls
and frighten people off.

So it was all cluttered in heads.

If you lived around here, you'd
constantly be hearing, like,

screaming going on and...
As nice as it is... it's lovely.

Do you know what I mean?

All these trees, nice buildings
and that, but that would make me

go, "I want to move,"
to be honest.

I mean, all that going on all
the time... someone screaming

their trap out.

"Aah."

This would have been a good hiding
place when you think about it.

If you're... if you're choosed to
have your head cut off, great

place to sort of run
around, isn't it?

Got too many, though.

It's like an Ikea for,
like, columns, isn't it?

Which one?
Which one would you want?

Well, any.

They're all the same.

Just... can't get [Bleep] Of them.

How many do you need?

Standing at the tzompantli,
you can still get that eerie

feeling that the spaniards felt
when they first witnessed the

human sacrifice conducted
by the indigenous people

throughout this region.

Aaah!

That is big, isn't it?

It's coming this way.

No.

Hey, he loved that.

Want some more?

Yeah, it seen it.

Yeah, I'll have a
bit more of that.

It's weird how you can have something
in common with something so different.

That's like millions of
years old, isn't it?

But he still likes to hobnob.

In most religions, an afterlife
is a realm of peace.

I want to hear this.

♪ When I'm with you, baby ♪

♪ I go out of my head ♪

♪ just can't get enough ♪

♪ just can't enough ♪

♪ all the things you do to me
and everything you said ♪

♪ I just can't get enough ♪

♪ I just can't enough ♪

It's funny, isn't it?

Even though it's, like, a bad
vibe, the area, with a bit of

human league, it's
happier, isn't it?

♪ ...Get enough of ♪

Oh, wow, yeah.

Of course it is.

Depeche Mode.

If they would have, like...
Televised the sacrificing... sky tv/i>

having this...
♪ just can't get enough ♪

Cut another one off.

♪ I just can't get enough ♪

♪ it's getting hotter ♪

♪ it's a burning love ♪

♪ and I just can't seem to get

♪ and I just can't seem to get
enough of ♪

Oh, here we go. Look.

Here we go.

It's already starting.

What's that?

Oh, yeah.

Got any, um, jumping beans?

Mexican jumping beans?

No.

Do you know anyone who
does around here?

No.

No one.

No.

Why not?

I tell you, you'd make a killing.

Just get rid of half the plates,
add some jumping beans.

So sorry.

It's getting busy now, isn't it?

What's the clapping thing about?

Yeah, it's just...

Oh, now I'm hearing it.

It's like a boing, boing, boing.

Yeah, yeah.

Boing, boing, boing.

Is that me doing that?

Yeah.

Just a fluke, though, isn't it?

That can't be...
Whoever designed that didn't say

to the builder, "Right, listen.

I need some sort of structure,
some sort of platform that we

can cut heads off, and when
the heads roll down, and just at

the bottom, somebody want to clap,
and it sort of bounces back.

They wouldn't... that just
wouldn't be on the to-do list.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

Is that... I mean, you know, is
that what they really wanted

this to be like
when they built it?

This wonder...
Wonder of the world?

Is she all right, yeah?

This woman's fainted.

Oh.

You see, though.

Everybody loves it.

It gets a bigger crowd then
the wonder now 'cause people go,

"What's going on, Elsie?"

Now they'll get the camera out.

Think they're dying.

Oh, she's still alive.

Let's move on.

The ambulance now.

I prefer to get out of it now.

I feel like I've seen it.

I've had a bit of
a lesson with this.

It's been all right.

It's not been me favorite bit
of Mexico if I'm honest.

More people flogging

I'm half tempted just to sort of fall over
like that woman, get a lift home.

I'm going home today.

I'm always sort of happy
about going home.

But, um, I've enjoyed
it here quite a lot.

I'd probably say it's me
favorite place I've ever been

to, which is a pretty big
statement, isn't it?

I mean, the wonder wasn't great.

I wouldn't say come to
Mexico to see the wonder.

It's everything else.

There doesn't seem to
be any sort of rules.

They just do what they want to do.

And I felt like I've been able
to do what I want to do once

I've been here, really.

Something else, as well.

Women are quite... you know, they look
quite big... big people -a lot of them.

Do you like that?

In a way.

Because they don't care.

Our own women don't eat what
you want to eat, do they?

You go, "What in the oven?"

They'll go... you know, I'll say
to Suzanne, "We'll have chippy."

"Yeah, all right.

I'll just have... "I'll just
have haddock," and then I go,

"Well, I'm having COD and chips."

And you get them, and she's
like, "Can I have some chips?"

"No, you can't.

You had the option to have chips.

You said you don't want to."

It's all that thing about weight,
whereas here, she's having chips.

She's having chips
day in, day out.

She's not bothered.

And I quite like that.

It's a sort of a free spirit
they've got, isn't it?

They live the life they want to live...
Which we don't really do at home.

I like it.
I bet I could live here.

For a bit.

The only thing that I'm a bit
sort of *** about

is not seeing
the Mexican jumping bean.

Yeah...

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