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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:06,040
This programme
contains some strong language
2
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:07,640
Oh, mate, wait there.
3
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,160
You look like Jason Statham, my son.
4
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:11,840
You're his ringer.
5
00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:13,520
You're delicious.
6
00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:19,720
What do you reckon? 10/10?
Absolute sort.
7
00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:23,920
MUSIC: Super Freak
by Rick James
8
00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:38,240
# She's a very kinky girl
9
00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:41,120
# The kind you don't take home
to mother
10
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:45,000
# She will never let
your spirits down
11
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,960
# Once you get her off the street
12
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:52,040
# She likes the boys in the band
13
00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:55,720
# She says that I'm her
all time favourite
14
00:00:55,720 --> 00:00:59,840
# When I make my move to her room,
it's the right time,
15
00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:01,800
# She's never hard to please
16
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,240
# Oh, no
17
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:07,200
# That girl is pretty wild now
The girl's a super freak
18
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:10,640
# The kind of girl you read about
In new wave magazines
19
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:14,080
# That girl is pretty kinky
The girl's a super freak
20
00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:16,760
# I'd really love to taste her
Every time... #
21
00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:18,840
HE BELCHES
22
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:23,400
Oh, I love it down here.
23
00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:26,760
I absolutely love it here
down at the Dave.
24
00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,640
Oh, hold the front page.
25
00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:32,120
12 o'clock across the pool. Don't
make it blatant but have a look.
26
00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:34,120
Be subtle, be subtle, babe.
Who is it?
27
00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:35,880
Darren Ferdinando from school.
28
00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:37,680
That's got to be his wife
Chloe Ferdinando,
29
00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:39,880
I've seen her on Facebook,
people you may know.
30
00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:43,680
Oh, what?
31
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:45,320
He's only gone and swan dived.
32
00:01:45,320 --> 00:01:48,600
He's swan... Look at him, look
at him glide through that water.
33
00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:50,680
Oh, that technique.
34
00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:54,600
Oh, I tell you,
I'm going to just say it as it is.
35
00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:56,200
He's the strongest geezer down here.
36
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,080
We should go and say hello
then, babe.
37
00:02:01,600 --> 00:02:03,400
I might actually do that.
38
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:06,000
Might just slip in the pool,
have a little swim over.
39
00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:08,800
Just sort of say something
about something, you know?
40
00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:12,560
Yeah, exactly. Here, you could talk
to him about that documentary
41
00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:15,280
you watched on sinkholes.
PHONE BUZZES
42
00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:17,680
Yeah. I thought that was
well interesting.
43
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:22,720
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
What is it?
44
00:02:22,720 --> 00:02:27,640
It's my mum. Stuart Williams from
number 36 is having a BBQ on Sunday
45
00:02:27,640 --> 00:02:30,640
but we're already having a BBQ
on Sunday.
46
00:02:30,640 --> 00:02:33,480
Well, what's he playing at?
He's only been here two minutes.
47
00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:36,040
See, I told you he'd be trouble.
48
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:38,520
You did say that, to be fair.
Didn't I?
49
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:39,720
Oh, God. Didn't I?
50
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:43,080
The last 40 years, my family have
run the Butterchurn Crescent
51
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:46,360
inaugural BBQ. My granddad
started this thing,
52
00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:49,680
and on the first year
that I take over from my father,
53
00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:53,560
some other wally comes down and has
a barbecue just down the road.
54
00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:58,200
Nah, nah, nah, no way, Jose.
Are you stupid? No. Oh. Ah.
55
00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,440
I'm having one.
I'm in the midst of one.
56
00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:01,720
I'm having a panic attack.
57
00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:03,080
Oh. Oh.
58
00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:06,600
I'm drownding,
I'm drownding, I'm drownding.
59
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:08,480
Gary, Gary, you are not drownding.
60
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:10,360
Oi, oi. You are not drownding.
61
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:12,040
Look at me, look at me.
62
00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:15,040
You need to calm down,
get yourself together,
63
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:18,400
get yourself dressed, get me another
drink and go and talk to your dad.
64
00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:21,160
Be straight with him,
he'll understand. Do you think?
65
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:24,000
I don't think, I know.
66
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:46,120
No, I don't know
what he's going to do, no.
67
00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:49,000
Well, it puts you in an awkward
position, doesn't it?
68
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,520
I'm so sorry.
69
00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:51,840
Shoes.
70
00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:54,760
I'm just on the phone to Hazel.
71
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,680
Listen, Mum, does Dad know about
this thing
72
00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,280
because I don't want it to become
like a big deal and stuff.
73
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,600
I'm not getting involved,
but just so you know,
74
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:03,880
if this goes south,
he will be devastated.
75
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,080
Well, you'll be glad to know
it's not going south,
76
00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:07,880
it's not going anywhere
near the south,
77
00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:09,720
it's going to stay firmly
in the north, so...
78
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,960
All right, boy? Has your mum told
you, has she? Has she told you?
79
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,440
Yeah, she was just saying
actually and um...
80
00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,320
Just bought the world's
sharpest knife.
81
00:04:17,320 --> 00:04:19,240
Here it is, just unboxed it.
82
00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,800
I got it off the internet TV
last night,
83
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:24,200
and I'm going to use it on the hog
roast at your first BBQ.
84
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,160
Oh, nice one. This'll cut
through anything.
85
00:04:26,160 --> 00:04:29,400
It'll cut through fruit,
frozen fruit, meat, frozen meat.
86
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:32,400
A hammer. Why would you need it
to cut through a hammer?
87
00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:35,320
Do you want a little hold, boy,
feel it in your hand?
88
00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:37,920
Go on, have a little hold.
They're banned in Mexico, them.
89
00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:39,480
Oh, wow, that is, that's a...
90
00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:41,680
That's a decent old bit of kit,
innit? That's lovely.
91
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:44,000
That's, that's,
definitely bring this to the BBQ.
92
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,800
If there is a BBQ,
what with everything that's gone on.
93
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,720
Oh, no. Please.
94
00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:54,800
Not the BBQ. Not the King's
Butterchurn Crescent inaugural BBQ?
95
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,080
First year and you've naused it?
96
00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:59,440
Oh, I haven't naused it, I
haven't... I've not...
97
00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:02,600
For everyone in this room, let me
state now - I have not naused it.
98
00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:05,480
It's just that someone else on the
crescent is having a BBQ
99
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:08,040
on the same day. Someone else on the
crescent on the same day!
100
00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:11,360
Oh, he's melted. His arse has gone
at the first hurdle.
101
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:14,760
Nah, nah, nah, nah. Nah, nah, nah,
nah, nah, nah, nah, it hasn't.
102
00:05:14,760 --> 00:05:17,880
This Stuart Williams fellow,
he's an absolute no-bo dad.
103
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:19,840
No-one's even going to go
to his BBQ, so...
104
00:05:19,840 --> 00:05:22,160
Well, Hazel said she's going to his,
105
00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:24,880
because she didn't get an
invite to yours. Oh, she did.
106
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:26,280
She definitely did.
107
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,160
I emailed and I WhatsApped everyone.
108
00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:30,080
What, what? No paper invites?
109
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,760
This is worse than I thought.
110
00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:33,200
Listen, Dad, listen to me.
111
00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:35,720
I'll tell you something,
I want to tell you, right,
112
00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:38,360
this Stuart Williams, I'm going
to go and have a word with him.
113
00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:40,240
You're going to have to have
a word with him.
114
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:41,600
You going to have a word with him?
115
00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:42,920
Oh, I'm going to say something.
116
00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:45,360
You're going to have to say
something. I will say something.
117
00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:46,640
Oh, I will. Hazel.
118
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:50,640
Yeah, he's going to say something.
119
00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:52,880
Oh, God, yeah, I know.
120
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:56,800
I'm so nervous,
but I've got to try it. Yeah.
121
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,840
I mean everyone is doing it.
122
00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:01,520
I'm told it doesn't even
hurt that much.
123
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:03,840
Although obviously,
it depends who you go with.
124
00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:05,800
Are you talking about bum sex?
125
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:07,000
No, no.
126
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,280
You just say what I say, babe,
I say, "Gal, I will do it
127
00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:12,440
"if I'm drunk, and it's your
birthday."
128
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,640
Either/or, do you know
what I'm saying?
129
00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:16,840
Oh, bless you. No we're talking
about micro-blading.
130
00:06:16,840 --> 00:06:19,240
Oh, yeah, micro-blading.
131
00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:21,720
Oh, they doing that down
here, are they?
132
00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:23,960
Cool, cool, cool, cool, yeah.
Yeah, done that, yeah.
133
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:25,880
Me and my hubby Gary,
you know, little Gary,
134
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,520
son of big Gary King, used to go
to school with your Darren?
135
00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:31,240
No, I don't. Yeah, we tried it in
like Miami, two years ago.
136
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,480
My Gal really struggled on the
micro-blades, though.
137
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:37,720
Oh, just so you know, micro-blading
is a semi-permanent eyebrow tattoo.
138
00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:42,080
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, exactly, yeah.
139
00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:43,600
Very specialist.
140
00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,120
I'm having mine done this afternoon
141
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:47,160
even though my eyebrows are
naturally perfect.
142
00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:50,400
Has Holly Willoughby had it done?
143
00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:51,600
I've no idea, babe.
144
00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:54,240
She's my queen, that one.
She's like a proper lady, isn't she?
145
00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:56,440
I mean, everyone says I look like
her and I'm like that,
146
00:06:56,440 --> 00:06:57,840
"All right, enough!"
147
00:06:57,840 --> 00:06:59,960
Can't see it. Have a closer look.
148
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,800
Are you going to put some
clothes on or..?
149
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:07,000
Mm? Nah, nah, nah, nah.
150
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,680
Nah, not until I'm completely,
151
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:10,640
you know, air dried, no.
152
00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:13,400
You see them house towels you've got
on there, girls?
153
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:14,560
Don't trust 'em, nah.
154
00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,120
Gave me proper bad pinkeye
about a month ago.
155
00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:19,280
Laters, chicas.
156
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:37,760
Hello?
157
00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:40,000
Everybody in the crescent
knows the Kings
158
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,760
have the first BBQ of the summer.
159
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:43,520
Sorry, who are you?
160
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:45,760
Gary, Gary King, I live at the
corner plot over there,
161
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:46,800
sweet little place.
162
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,680
Couple of concrete lions out the
front, all the bedrooms converted
163
00:07:49,680 --> 00:07:52,680
to en-suite, already worth double
what I paid for it, so, there we go.
164
00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:55,000
Yeah, I think I know it,
what seems to be the problem?
165
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,320
Your rival BBQ on Sunday, mate.
166
00:07:57,320 --> 00:08:00,520
Yes, I'm having a barbeque on
Sunday, it's my wife's birthday.
167
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:02,960
I don't care if it's your
wife's birthday.
168
00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:04,680
No, it is my wife's birthday.
169
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:07,520
Exactly! I do not care
if it's your wife birthday.
170
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,520
What? No, it is my wife's birthday.
171
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:14,360
Listen, there's a Crescent WhatsApp
group
172
00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:16,760
so this kind of bedlam
doesn't happen.
173
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,520
All Crescent business must go
through the WhatsApp group.
174
00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:23,600
Yeah, I muted that WhatsApp
group months ago.
175
00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:27,160
What?!
176
00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:30,200
You muted a street WhatsApp group,
Stuart.
177
00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:32,880
What if there's some kind of
emergency down here on the Crescent?
178
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,800
Really, like what?
Like two BBQs on the same day.
179
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:37,440
Listen, erm...
180
00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:40,160
Gary, Gary King.
181
00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:42,920
Gary, right, I mean we've actually
only invited like a handful
182
00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:45,560
of people from the Crescent, so...
I love this Crescent.
183
00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:47,200
I love everyone on it.
184
00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:49,080
I know all the people.
185
00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:51,160
Name any number,
name any number of the Crescent.
186
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:53,000
Right, no, I'm not getting
into this, mate.
187
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:56,720
Mate, I'll sleep on this porch.
You name a number, I ain't
going nowhere till you do.
188
00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,040
Test me here.
Name a number, any number.
189
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:03,000
Er, number 53.
190
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,560
Number 5... I live at number 53.
191
00:09:05,560 --> 00:09:08,760
That's my house. You can see that
from here, you're just...
192
00:09:08,760 --> 00:09:11,560
Any other number, just name one.
193
00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:13,000
Are we still doing this thing or..?
194
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,240
Yes, we're doing it, name one.
195
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,240
Erm, 68.
196
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:20,120
68, Alison Clark, she lives alone,
her husband Clarky,
197
00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,440
he died two years ago because his
blood stopped working.
198
00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,000
Right, well,
I'm sorry to hear about that.
199
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,640
Where are you getting
your meat from?
200
00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,240
Err, Gribbin's, I think.
201
00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:31,680
Gribbin's the butchers?
202
00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,920
Yes, I tend to get my meat
from the butchers, yeah.
203
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:36,240
Don't make a joke out of this, mate,
seriously.
204
00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:38,440
I'm telling you now, you do not make
a joke out of this.
205
00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:40,960
Because what you've got now, mate,
you've got yourself a war.
206
00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:42,560
You're in a war now, mate.
There we go,
207
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:44,520
there's a war going on
between me and you, right?
208
00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:46,560
Yeah, mate, you're in a war
and once you're in a war,
209
00:09:46,560 --> 00:09:49,080
you can't get out of the war that
you're in, until the war is over.
210
00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:51,360
So, war time. You're losing it here,
this is ridiculous.
211
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,240
You're ridiculous, mate,
so see you around.
212
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:56,600
Mind the plant pot, won't you, mate.
213
00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:59,200
Snide. You're a sh...nide, mate.
214
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:02,200
CAR HORN HONKS
215
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,560
Gentleman,
time is of the very essence.
216
00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:19,440
Now I've emailed you all
a list of jobs.
217
00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:23,000
First up I need a leaflet drop,
advertising the BBQ.
218
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,400
I want you to hit up
every residence,
219
00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:28,040
every local business, every shop,
every pub, every gym.
220
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:32,200
All the bakers in town, the kebab
store, every block of flats.
221
00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:35,000
Flats?
Does your dad know about all this?
222
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,720
He does, and it's none
of his concern.
223
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:38,280
None of yours either, Winkle.
224
00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:41,240
I run the business,
how I want, when I want.
225
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,360
Well, what are we going to do about
the primary school job this weekend?
226
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,920
The leaky roof. I've pulled it.
227
00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:49,240
This is a million times
more important.
228
00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:51,640
Oh, I don't know,
what will big Gary think about that?
229
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,520
We're supposed to be
finished by Monday.
230
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,960
Don't test me in front of the other
lads, Winkle, all right.
231
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:58,120
Yes, Wayne, you haven't got to put
your hand up, son.
232
00:10:58,120 --> 00:10:59,440
Do we still get double bubble?
233
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:02,440
You'll have to ask his mum,
she does the timesheets.
234
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:04,680
Hey, hey, hey! Don't tell my mum
anything, all right?
235
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:08,640
I'm the boss, I'm the leader,
this is my dance, this is my disco.
236
00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:11,720
And let me tell you now, all of you
are getting double bubble,
237
00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:15,080
all weekend long. Now there's a box
of leaflets there, you lot get gone.
238
00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,720
I've got something very important
to take care of.
239
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,880
Here he is, little Gary!
240
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,360
Head in the clouds,
what's the weather like up there?
241
00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,680
I'm not actually here
for banter today, so...
242
00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:26,320
His mother said he wouldn't be long.
243
00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:27,360
Listen, erm...
244
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:28,840
He were too big for a normal pram,
245
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:31,280
his old man used to schlep him
about in a wheelbarrow.
246
00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:33,960
Shut up! Shut your noise.
247
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,240
What have I done, Gal?
248
00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:37,880
Stuart Williams, yeah.
249
00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:41,720
I know about you and him
carrying on behind my back.
250
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:46,200
You supplying his BBQ on the very
same day as my BBQ, John.
251
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:47,520
St..
252
00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:50,080
Beady fella! Five ten,
rides the foldy bike.
253
00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,960
He lives down your road!
I know he lives down my road.
254
00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,120
That is the problem!
That's what's created
255
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:58,000
this absolute nightmare what I'm
living through right now.
256
00:11:58,000 --> 00:11:59,120
All right, all right.
257
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:01,440
You know I don't want to fall out
with you or big Gary.
258
00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:03,440
You tell me what to do, it's done.
259
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:06,080
You phone this Stuart Williams,
260
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:09,240
you cancel his order,
you say that you've ran out of meat,
261
00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:12,200
then you close this place down
for a week or two. Lie low, John.
262
00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:15,280
I'll cover all your costs, I'll give
you a nice little drink on top.
263
00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:19,840
And from now on, you don't call me
Little Gary no more.
264
00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:21,440
Well, what do I call you then,
Big Gary?
265
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,680
Well, not Big Gary, Big
Gary's me dad's name so...
266
00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:25,400
Great Big Gary? No, I don't wanna...
267
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:27,480
Bald Gary? No, no. Chunky Gary!
268
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:29,960
No, that's just offensive, John,
so no. Fat Gary?
269
00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:32,960
Just Gary! From now on I'm just
Gary, all right?
270
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,520
Ah, get in there.
271
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,280
Ah!
272
00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:43,160
Ah, not up there, hey.
273
00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:57,680
You all right?
274
00:12:57,680 --> 00:12:59,360
Yeah, sweet as, yeah.
275
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:03,760
Like to...get my head under from
time to time because I was
a water baby.
276
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:10,800
Oh! Your, your...doo-dahs, yeah, ah.
277
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:12,520
Yeah, they look banging, actually.
278
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:15,400
Yeah, they don't look fake,
but they are fake,
279
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:18,480
but they look real,
do you know what I mean? Yeah.
280
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:20,240
Yeah, you should get yours done.
281
00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:21,880
Already am, babe, yeah, yeah.
282
00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:25,720
My mate Kay's doing them, she's like
the Banksy of eyebrows so, you know.
283
00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,680
Want to look all nice for my Gal at
his big BBQ, you know what I mean?
284
00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:31,640
Oh, love a cook out.
285
00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:34,360
Sorry, a what out?
286
00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:35,800
A cook out.
287
00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:39,560
Oh, sorry, it's just an
Americanism for barbecue.
288
00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:42,880
Right.
289
00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:44,280
Nice.
290
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:46,920
Oh, look, you should, should...
291
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:51,040
..come to our cook out,
because we are cooking out, cowgirl.
292
00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:56,040
No, seriously, you should come along
and bring your Darren.
293
00:13:56,040 --> 00:13:58,240
I know my Gary would absolutely
love that.
294
00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:02,120
I'll come 100%, but I can't say
for sure about Darren because...
295
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,600
Oh, God, I'm really not supposed
to say anything
296
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:07,960
but can you keep a secret?
Er, yeah, babe.
297
00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:11,840
He's doing the dry-lining at
Ian Wright's house.
298
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:13,040
Fuck off!
299
00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:14,680
Ian's really happy with his work,
300
00:14:14,680 --> 00:14:16,680
he's already texted Lee Dixon
and Alan Shearer.
301
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:19,280
And if he can get in with them
and Gary Lineker,
302
00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,560
you're talking serious money.
303
00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:23,480
Ah, well, yeah.
Fair play to you.
304
00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:24,720
That's, that's...
305
00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:26,440
That's massive.
306
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:28,400
Yeah.
307
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:31,360
We're still the same people,
but we are doing a little bit better
308
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,600
than everyone else,
do you know what I mean?
309
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,960
Winkle.
HE WHISTLES
310
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:49,640
Wink. Winkle, son.
How's it all going?
311
00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:52,400
Well, it was OK but we've had
a big setback.
312
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:56,120
Absolute disaster, in fact.
I'll let Mr Bounce explain.
313
00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:58,600
Benny Bounce - castles, slides,
pools, balls.
314
00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,240
If it bounces, we hire it.
315
00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:03,080
Mr Bounce, an absolute honour
to meet you, sir.
316
00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:04,320
What seems to be the problem?
317
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,480
It's your inflatable slide
I'm afraid.
318
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:08,520
You can't fit it in your garden.
319
00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:12,160
OK. Are you absolutely sure
about this, Ben?
320
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,800
Maybe we go without it, Gal.
321
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,840
Maybe move on, mate.
322
00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:17,200
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah.
323
00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:20,120
No, that inflatable slide, that's an
imperative part of my vision.
324
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,680
I need it.
325
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:24,200
OK, just give me a second,
let me have a little think.
326
00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:27,560
I've got, I have got it.
327
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,880
The way I see it,
there's only one option.
328
00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:33,360
We're going to have to knock through
into Mrs Watson's garden next door.
329
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,200
That's the only way
we're going to do this.
330
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:41,800
Hello, Miss Watson, love.
331
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:43,520
Hello, Mark.
332
00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:46,720
I'm just going to lob some bits and
bobs and your garden here,
all right?
333
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,640
You ain't going to notice
that you're there.
334
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,240
Thank you very much.
335
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:52,480
You're more than welcome.
336
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:54,840
Right, it's grim in here,
I'm not going to lie to you.
337
00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:57,520
It's pretty disgusting, the poor old
bird's let herself down.
338
00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:59,560
Let's get a lawnmower,
some strimmers,
339
00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:02,160
let's get it cleaned up ASAP, boys.
Let's do it, yeah.
340
00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:04,560
Sorry, so, so where do you want
the Porta-Potties?
341
00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:06,720
In here, mate, in Mrs Watson's
garden, all right?
342
00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:09,640
That's why we've knocked it through.
And where are the Waltzers going?
343
00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:12,440
Right, everyone listen to me because
I'm going to say this once.
344
00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:15,520
Porta-Potties, Waltzers,
inflatable slide,
345
00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:19,000
in fact, all of the rides come
in here in Mrs Watson's garden.
346
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,760
Lob the smoking area in here
too, all right?
347
00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:36,840
Morning, Gal.
348
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,520
You all right? Yeah, this little
Piggy went to market.
349
00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,400
Mate, I'm up against it here, I've
got no time for joking and stuff.
350
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,840
Get that meat in the chest freezer
by the DJ booth at once. Gal.
351
00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:49,120
Randy. mate, pick up your feet
when you're moving, son.
352
00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:50,680
That fence won't move itself. boy.
353
00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:52,440
Gal. I need to show you something.
354
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:54,560
So basically I went to see
Kay last night.
355
00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:55,920
What, mad Kay from the flats?
356
00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:57,000
Yeah...
357
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:00,920
It's my eyebrows.
358
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,280
Right, yeah, OK...
Morning, Tel. whoa!
359
00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:11,200
What, weren't you expecting us?
Didn't you know we were coming?
360
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:12,840
All right, all right, mate.
That's...
361
00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:15,680
Here, get her a Benadryl, Gal, she
looks like she's going to sneeze.
362
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,840
All right, yep, yep, carry on,
mate, with what you were doing.
363
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:22,160
What have I done, Gal?
364
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:24,600
And why are they so high?
365
00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:28,680
I look like fucking Coco the Clown.
366
00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,680
I mean, what am I going to do?
367
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:31,760
Kids entertainment.
368
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:34,120
That's enough out of you,
you get that meat in the freezer,
369
00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,880
you take your boy and you
get out of here.
370
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:37,600
Yeah, no, I... Sorry, Gal.
371
00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:39,720
I'll make you right. Shut up.
372
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,480
I can not let anyone see me
like this, Gary.
373
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,040
I look like I've just stepped on
a piece of Lego.
374
00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:48,840
Now you listen to me, right.
375
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:52,480
Your surprise face
376
00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:55,880
is my favourite face out of all the
faces what you do.
377
00:17:57,840 --> 00:17:59,160
Yeah? Oh. yeah.
378
00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:02,960
When we were 16, first French kiss,
down by the Wandle,
379
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:05,200
you find out that I've got
my tongue pierced.
380
00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:06,760
Surprise face.
381
00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:09,880
When you thought that we couldn't go
to Ibiza
382
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,160
because I had contracted worms
off that street cat,
383
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,840
but I turned up at your house,
picked you up, we went.
384
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:16,240
Surprise face.
385
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:20,480
When we found out you were
pregnant with our Teddy,
386
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:22,800
even though we thought
I was a Jaffa.
387
00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:24,120
Surprise face.
388
00:18:24,120 --> 00:18:26,960
See, your surprise face is the
cornerstone
389
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:31,120
of all of the happiest moments
of my whole life.
390
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:36,360
I love your eyebrows.
391
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,960
Thanks Gal.
392
00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,720
I love you, bub,
but I need to get this BBQ sorted.
393
00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:45,200
Ooh, hold on, I've got
something to tell you.
394
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,840
Erm, erm, Chloe just text me.
395
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,680
Darren Ferdinando's
coming to the BBQ.
396
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:58,120
I'm actually going to cry.
397
00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,400
Please tell me you're not
pulling my plonker, babe.
398
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:02,080
He's really coming, babe.
399
00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:04,720
This ain't a dream, this is real
life, this is really happening.
400
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:07,680
I've been waiting for this
moment my whole life.
401
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,280
Darren Ferdinando's coming to my
house to play. Yeah.
402
00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:13,280
Oh, babe, thank you.
403
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:14,920
Oh, I need to change my outfit,
404
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,240
that's the first thing
I need to do, innit?
405
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:19,120
I think, I can't go, I need
to think about this.
406
00:19:19,120 --> 00:19:22,040
All right. Ooh, white skinny jeans.
Yes, yes!
407
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:23,600
Ooh, Gal, Gal.
408
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:25,240
What? No socks.
409
00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:26,400
Yeah.
410
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:34,360
MUSIC: All This Love That I'm Giving
by Gwen McCrae
411
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,880
# You try hard
412
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:42,440
# Getting next to me
413
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:44,440
# I was so in love with you
414
00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:46,360
# I could hardly see
415
00:19:46,360 --> 00:19:48,680
# Now it seems you wanna
416
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:50,840
# Run out on me
417
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:52,840
# Now after all this time
418
00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:55,000
# Tell me can't you see
419
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,920
# All this love that I'm giving
420
00:19:57,920 --> 00:19:59,640
# Giving my love... #
421
00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:01,520
ECHOING: Council lager.
422
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,640
That bin's full of council lager.
423
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:09,320
That bin's full of council lager.
What? You're kidding.
424
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:11,640
Yeah, it's full to the brim
of council lager,
425
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,920
supermarket own stuff.
It's a bit tacky, that.
426
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:17,240
Well, I just bought classy stuff,
I went with like Stella, Peroni.
427
00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:19,320
Someone must have just
smuggled that gear in.
428
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:21,920
You've gone too early on them coals.
They're not even white yet.
429
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,640
Yeah, they are, they're fine.
They're lovely and white.
430
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,000
Winkle said you sold one
of the work vans. What?
431
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,160
You did what?
432
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:30,320
I didn't, I haven't sold anything,
I swear, Dad.
433
00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:33,440
You need to turn them sausages. I am
turning them, I'm in control here.
434
00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:36,720
I did the lad's timesheets and
they've charged double bubble
435
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,120
for helping you here,
436
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:40,760
rather than finishing
that school job in Margate.
437
00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:44,120
You've used company money
to pay for this fiasco?
438
00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:47,600
Fiasco, this is not a fiasco,
this ain't a fiasco by a long shot.
439
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:48,920
It's a smashing success, Dad.
440
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,760
Look, everyone's having a great
time, everyone's really loving it.
441
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,440
You've burnt it now.
442
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:56,880
Look, you gotta turn the meat, son.
Rotation, rotation, rotation.
443
00:20:56,880 --> 00:21:00,000
Got you a beer, Big Gal.
It's a Belgian one.
444
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,960
Can't wait to see this world's
sharpest knife,
445
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,320
you don't do things by half, you.
446
00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:06,000
Oh, don't, here we go. It is ruined.
447
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:08,880
She has ruined the world's
sharpest knife.
448
00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:10,320
I just put him in the dishwasher.
449
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:13,240
Just? It struggled to cut through
a mango this morning.
450
00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:15,840
Gal...
Oh, my God, your eyebrows.
451
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:18,760
Yeah, I know, Denise. Thank you.
452
00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:22,200
Right, babe, action stations.
Chloe and Darren have just arrived.
453
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:24,080
Better go and say hello.
454
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:25,920
Right, they're here.
455
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:29,000
Right, I've got this, I've got this,
Gary. I've got this, I've got this.
456
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:31,240
20 years. 20 years I've been
waiting for this.
457
00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:32,880
Winkle, man the BBQ, all right, boy?
458
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,840
Hello, babe, thanks for coming.
459
00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,200
Oh! What happened to your eyebrows?
460
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:42,520
Oh, they are so awful.
461
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:46,600
Oh, no. Nah, no, no, see, it's
exactly how I wanted them, yeah.
462
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,880
It's actually my Gal's
favourite face
463
00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:50,840
out all the faces what I do, so...
464
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,920
Oh, right.
465
00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:59,440
Hey, Dal. How you doing, man?
466
00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:01,080
Mad one...
467
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:04,680
..we actually went to school
together, Gary King.
468
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:06,320
Big chestnut.
469
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,200
Oh, right, yeah. Sort of forgotten
all about you
470
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:14,320
but then I see you down at the Dave
the other day, and I was like wow.
471
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:17,760
You were swimming and stuff and I
was saying to my wife,
that guy's got..
472
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:20,440
You had amazing technique.
You've got that locked down,
473
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:21,800
the front crawl.
474
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,840
Maybe if...
475
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:25,200
Yeah, I'm just not...
476
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:27,360
I'm, I...can't do it.
477
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:30,920
Yeah.
478
00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,960
Oh, God. Oh, well, actually, that's
what I was going to say to ya.
479
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:42,080
Guess who I saw the other day?
Cheryl Philpott.
480
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:43,440
Yeah, I saw her in Asda,
481
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,200
she's married to Phil Joss now,
of all things.
482
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,920
By accounts looking at
probably getting a...
483
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:50,160
..a loft extension.
484
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:54,040
Yeah?
485
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:12,040
Erm, what was I going to say
about it? Erm...
486
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:13,960
Oh, yeah!
487
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:19,240
Um...you're doing the dry-lining at
Ian Wright's house?
488
00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:21,720
Oh, yeah.
489
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,120
Yeah.
490
00:23:27,120 --> 00:23:28,400
Yeah.
491
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:34,760
Oh, man, so, nice just catching up
and talking about stuff
492
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:38,280
and I haven't seen you for so long,
so, just, yeah.
493
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:40,520
Yeah, just nice seeing you, bro.
494
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,000
Good seeing you, mate.
495
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:47,800
See you later, yeah.
496
00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:49,560
So, how did that go then?
497
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:51,800
That went it exactly how I thought
it was going to go.
498
00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:53,960
Yeah, yeah, did it come out just
like we practised?
499
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:57,400
Exactly, we were just like toing
and froing beautifully.
500
00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:58,640
Nice.
501
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,200
All right, Stu.
502
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,120
How's your BBQ, mate?
503
00:24:31,120 --> 00:24:32,640
What do you want?
504
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:35,040
I'm here to put this feud to bed.
505
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:38,720
Listen, you jumped in at the deep
end with this BBQ thing
506
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:41,680
and you made yourself look like
a bit of a mug,
507
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:46,600
but I wanted say, here's my heart,
here's my hand, mate.
508
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:49,320
I want to invite you, your wife,
509
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:53,720
your kids to come and have a hot dog
at my place, and, genuinely,
510
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,400
I'm actually sorry no-one
came to your stupid BBQ.
511
00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:01,480
No, it's fine, we...
512
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:03,400
..we just moved it.
513
00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:11,240
What?
514
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:12,280
We...
515
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:13,960
..moved it.
516
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:20,960
You can't just move a BBQ, mate.
517
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:23,560
We're in the middle of a war here.
518
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:24,880
An absolute war.
519
00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:27,560
I mean, I've thrown everything at
this thing,
520
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:29,120
I've thrown grands at it.
521
00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:32,120
I've, I've got fire breathers
over there, I've got Waltzers.
522
00:25:32,120 --> 00:25:34,400
I've got Stavros Flatly
turning up in a half hour.
523
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,560
Why? It's only a barbecue.
524
00:25:37,560 --> 00:25:41,400
Oh, you've done me, ain't ya?
525
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:43,520
Oh, mate! Oh, mate, touche.
526
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,280
Touche, fair play to ya. Fair play.
527
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:49,720
But I'm putting it around everywhere
you are a sh..nide,
528
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:51,240
you're a double shnide.
529
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,800
And that invite to you your wife
and kids, uninvited.
530
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,560
Never, ever again, you're never
coming to one of my BBQs.
531
00:25:56,560 --> 00:26:00,400
Well, it actually looks like you
have a bit of a problem down there
anyway, mate, so...
532
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:01,960
Oh, you're joking, mate, what the..
533
00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:03,880
Oh, mind the plant pot,
won't you, mate?
534
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,120
And this ain't over.
Not by a long stretch.
535
00:26:06,120 --> 00:26:08,120
Twat.
536
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:12,600
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.
537
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:14,080
Guys, guys, guys. What's going on?
538
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:16,280
Is this your house, sir?
Yeah, it is as it goes, yeah.
539
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,680
Gary King, this is my gaff,
what can I do for you, officer?
540
00:26:18,680 --> 00:26:20,120
Well, we've... We've had a com..
541
00:26:20,120 --> 00:26:22,520
Sorry, mate. Guys, let's not go yet,
let's not be too hasty.
542
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:25,200
Let's have another drink inside.
Give me a second here, would you?
543
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:27,840
I'm just trying to... Guys, I've got
confetti cannons in here.
544
00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:30,400
Sir, sir. We're gonna do confetti
cannon. All right, mate.
545
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:33,120
Karaoke hasn't even started yet.
Sir. Come on, fellas! Guys!
546
00:26:33,120 --> 00:26:34,400
Sir. Bobby, Bob.
547
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:35,800
Dad, what's going on, mate?
548
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:38,400
Just going to have a couple of pints
with Dal, top man, isn't he?
549
00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:41,080
Yeah, he's great. You know he's
doing dry-lining up Ian Wright's?
550
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:44,000
Yeah, I know, but where you going?
Dad, where are you going
to go to, mate?
551
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,600
Sir. Just text me, all right, are
you going to be in the snug? Sir?
552
00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:49,160
Dotty love, you're not going, are
you, Dot? No, come on, girls,
553
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,360
you're not going, are you?
Mr King. What?
554
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,440
We've had a complaint from one of
your neighbours
555
00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:56,880
about excessive noise pollution
so I'm afraid we're going to have
to close this down.
556
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,480
Listen, mate, the whole point of
this BBQ is that everyone
557
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:02,360
from the street is here.
That's the point of it, is that..
558
00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:06,880
OK.
559
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:17,880
Here, got you a Jagerbomb.
560
00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:22,160
Cheers, Tel. Look...
561
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:28,480
..be honest with me, how do you
think today went, BBQ-wise?
562
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:30,840
Babe, everybody loved it.
563
00:27:30,840 --> 00:27:34,360
Babe, it was like proper ram-oed,
it was brilliant.
564
00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:36,520
Do you know who enjoyed it the most?
565
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:37,640
No.
566
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:39,520
Me.
567
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:42,160
I'm so proud of you, like,
really proud.
568
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:45,960
Cross my heart and my minny and hope
to die and all that shit.
569
00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:49,560
I love you.
570
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:50,960
I love you too, babe.
571
00:27:54,360 --> 00:27:58,240
Now you hold that thought, because
I'm going to put on our song,
572
00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:00,080
and then we're going to have
a lickle dance,
573
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,280
and then we'll have a bunk up
underneath the stars.
574
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,240
MUSIC: Murder She Wrote
by Chaka Demus & Pliers
575
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:18,520
Oh, you didn't.
Oh, oh, oh, 'ere we go.
576
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:25,840
# I know this little girl,
her name is Maxine
577
00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:28,080
# Her beauty is like a bunch of rose
578
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,560
# If I ever tell you about Maxine
579
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:33,280
# You only say I don't know
what I know but
580
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:36,160
# Murder she wrote
For real, for real
581
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:38,120
# Murder she wrote
582
00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:41,160
# Murder she wrote
583
00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:42,720
# Murder she wrote
584
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:44,000
# Watch ya now, me name
585
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:45,640
Ah pretty face and bad character
586
00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:49,120
# Them there kind of livin'
can't hold Chaka, follow me!
587
00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:51,040
# Ah pretty face and bad character
588
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:53,240
# Them there kind of livin'
can't hold Chaka
589
00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:54,760
# Say, gyal, you're pretty
590
00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:57,040
# Your face it pretty
but your character dirty
591
00:28:57,040 --> 00:28:58,880
# Girl you just act
too flirty flirty
592
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,680
# You run to Tom, Dick, an also
Harry
593
00:29:01,680 --> 00:29:03,440
# An when you find your mistake... #
47043
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