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1
00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:12,334
- Hey, Frasier.
- Oh, hi, Roz.
2
00:00:12,835 --> 00:00:14,578
Checking out
the personal ads, huh?
3
00:00:14,795 --> 00:00:17,368
Actually, l'm looking at the want ads.
4
00:00:17,589 --> 00:00:19,249
l'm trying to find a housekeeper.
5
00:00:19,424 --> 00:00:22,092
Now that Daphne is Niles' girlfriend,
it doesn't feel right for me
6
00:00:22,259 --> 00:00:25,010
to ask her to pick up
after me anymore, so...
7
00:00:25,178 --> 00:00:27,466
lt's awfully difficult
finding someone, though.
8
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:30,349
lt's hard getting what you want
these days, isn't it?
9
00:00:30,557 --> 00:00:31,588
lndeed.
10
00:00:31,808 --> 00:00:36,764
But you can still find convenience
and value if you know where to look.
11
00:00:36,978 --> 00:00:39,894
- Dear God, what are you selling?
- Wrapping paper.
12
00:00:40,063 --> 00:00:41,973
lt's a fundraiser for Alice's school.
13
00:00:42,149 --> 00:00:44,899
- Well, at least it's a worthy cause.
- Yeah.
14
00:00:45,109 --> 00:00:46,852
All right, let's have a look.
15
00:00:47,777 --> 00:00:49,983
Oh, that one's too garish.
16
00:00:50,154 --> 00:00:52,395
l don't like this one either.
17
00:00:52,864 --> 00:00:54,145
Ooh, l'm certainly not crazy
18
00:00:54,324 --> 00:00:56,031
- about Garfield.
- Oh, give me that.
19
00:00:56,242 --> 00:00:58,033
You're getting five rolls
of Peace on Earth
20
00:00:58,202 --> 00:00:59,364
and thanks for your support.
21
00:00:59,536 --> 00:01:01,077
Roz.
22
00:01:02,621 --> 00:01:04,578
Macchiato.
23
00:01:04,747 --> 00:01:06,824
Make it a doppio.
24
00:01:09,335 --> 00:01:10,793
FRASlER:
Niles.
25
00:01:10,961 --> 00:01:13,202
Niles, please, whatever's wrong,
the answer doesn't lie
26
00:01:13,379 --> 00:01:16,130
at the bottom of an espresso cup.
27
00:01:16,923 --> 00:01:18,002
lt's Mel again.
28
00:01:18,175 --> 00:01:21,589
Oh, Lord. Still making you
humiliate yourself at social functions
29
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:23,384
while she plays
the long-suffering wife?
30
00:01:23,553 --> 00:01:25,011
l'm afraid so.
31
00:01:25,221 --> 00:01:27,841
But she said a couple more weeks
and l'll have my divorce.
32
00:01:28,056 --> 00:01:29,597
She said that two weeks ago.
33
00:01:31,434 --> 00:01:32,809
What was it this time?
34
00:01:33,018 --> 00:01:35,224
Well, we attended Colonel Turner's
very large,
35
00:01:35,395 --> 00:01:37,303
very high-Episcopalian funeral.
36
00:01:37,521 --> 00:01:40,094
During the course of which,
my cell phone rang repeatedly.
37
00:01:40,273 --> 00:01:41,980
l was not allowed to answer it.
38
00:01:42,149 --> 00:01:45,648
And Mel had set the ringer
on ''La Cucaracha.''
39
00:01:49,113 --> 00:01:51,650
- Oh, Niles, l'm so sorry.
- Oh, it's all right.
40
00:01:51,865 --> 00:01:54,271
No, l called you twice.
41
00:01:57,202 --> 00:01:59,325
Well, l ruined quite a sendoff.
42
00:01:59,496 --> 00:02:02,698
There was an honour guard,
the colonel's butler seating people.
43
00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:05,742
- Two archbishops presiding--
- Did you just say butler?
44
00:02:05,916 --> 00:02:09,367
Oh, yes, l know.
An honest-to-goodness English butler.
45
00:02:09,545 --> 00:02:11,122
The colonel was a bit
of an anachronism.
46
00:02:11,296 --> 00:02:13,702
Oh, yes. lt's amusing, really.
47
00:02:13,881 --> 00:02:16,169
l suppose this butler
saw to the colonel's every need.
48
00:02:16,382 --> 00:02:19,003
Oh, yeah, and clipped his cigars,
poured his scotch.
49
00:02:19,217 --> 00:02:21,839
Laid out his clothes for him
and served him his meals.
50
00:02:23,513 --> 00:02:25,505
- l saw him first.
- You had a gardener and maid.
51
00:02:25,681 --> 00:02:27,756
- Never a butler. lt's my dream.
- lt's my turn.
52
00:02:27,974 --> 00:02:29,681
Daphne won't have
to clean anymore.
53
00:02:30,767 --> 00:02:32,640
l tip my cap, sir.
54
00:03:05,209 --> 00:03:06,453
Ah.
55
00:03:06,626 --> 00:03:08,998
Ferguson, is it morning already?
56
00:03:09,211 --> 00:03:12,960
- lndeed, sir. l trust you slept well.
- Best sleep l've had in years.
57
00:03:13,132 --> 00:03:15,124
- Excellent. Your coffee, sir.
- Thank you.
58
00:03:15,300 --> 00:03:18,465
To think l was sceptical when you said
these pillows could be better arranged.
59
00:03:18,635 --> 00:03:21,718
Yes. Preparing a suitable
sleeping environment
60
00:03:21,887 --> 00:03:25,338
is one of the first tasks l learned
at my father's knee.
61
00:03:25,557 --> 00:03:28,427
- Oh, your father also buttled?
- Oh, yes, sir.
62
00:03:28,601 --> 00:03:31,850
Even my father's father
was a gentleman's gentleman.
63
00:03:32,020 --> 00:03:34,058
Ha-ha.
That's a good one, Ferguson.
64
00:03:34,563 --> 00:03:36,390
Thank you, sir.
lt's one of my staples.
65
00:03:38,233 --> 00:03:41,102
Will it be breakfast en suite today,
sir?
66
00:03:41,276 --> 00:03:43,683
No, l believe l'll join
the rest of the household.
67
00:03:43,903 --> 00:03:45,527
Very good, sir.
68
00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:48,736
Thank you, Ferguson.
69
00:03:50,325 --> 00:03:53,111
You spoil me. Keep it up.
70
00:03:56,454 --> 00:03:57,829
Good morning, Dad, Daphne.
71
00:03:57,996 --> 00:04:00,748
- Fras. Where's Lord Weirdo?
- Good morning.
72
00:04:02,959 --> 00:04:05,247
Dad, his name is Ferguson.
73
00:04:05,461 --> 00:04:08,295
[PHONE RlNGlNG]
74
00:04:10,214 --> 00:04:12,669
Good morning,
Dr. Crane's residence.
75
00:04:12,883 --> 00:04:15,005
Oh, good morning, Dr. Crane.
76
00:04:16,177 --> 00:04:20,303
Well, thank you, sir.
Your phone manner is also delightful.
77
00:04:21,638 --> 00:04:23,879
- lt's Dr. Crane for you, miss.
- Oh, thank you.
78
00:04:24,098 --> 00:04:28,226
Hello, Niles. Oh, yes.
79
00:04:28,394 --> 00:04:30,800
- Dear God.
- What's wrong?
80
00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:32,472
That politicking Alan Murchie
81
00:04:32,646 --> 00:04:34,804
has just been elected president
of the opera board.
82
00:04:35,023 --> 00:04:39,269
Yeah, l'll never forget where l was
when l heard the news.
83
00:04:40,653 --> 00:04:43,356
This pinhead is president,
l can't even get on the board.
84
00:04:43,529 --> 00:04:47,656
And what will you be sending
to congratulate Mr. Murchie, sir?
85
00:04:47,865 --> 00:04:49,692
Curses and epithets
is all he'll get from me.
86
00:04:49,867 --> 00:04:50,947
FERGUSON:
Quite right.
87
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:55,655
However, a well-chosen gift
might draw the eye of Mr. Murchie
88
00:04:55,830 --> 00:05:00,075
as he considers a replacement
for his now-vacated seat on the board.
89
00:05:03,336 --> 00:05:04,995
Well...
90
00:05:07,255 --> 00:05:08,748
lf it will make you happy, Ferguson,
91
00:05:08,922 --> 00:05:11,460
let's send him
a bottle of Chateau Beliveau.
92
00:05:12,175 --> 00:05:14,843
lf l may, sir,
l've overheard Mr. Murchie
93
00:05:15,011 --> 00:05:17,761
speak fondly of the family villa
in Umbria.
94
00:05:18,179 --> 00:05:22,590
He may consider a wine
from that region especially thoughtful.
95
00:05:26,143 --> 00:05:28,468
lt's a little on the nose, but fine.
96
00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:33,766
l love you too. Bye.
97
00:05:34,983 --> 00:05:37,473
- Manchester, right?
- ls it that obvious?
98
00:05:37,693 --> 00:05:40,018
Yeah, to me it is.
My mum's from Manchester.
99
00:05:40,195 --> 00:05:42,318
Used to scream her lungs out
for United.
100
00:05:42,488 --> 00:05:43,863
ls that so?
101
00:05:44,073 --> 00:05:46,527
My Uncle Jack once tried
to get Bobby Charlton's autograph,
102
00:05:46,699 --> 00:05:49,024
until Bobby cracked him
over the head with a can of lager.
103
00:05:49,201 --> 00:05:52,201
Twelve stitches,
and he still has the can.
104
00:05:54,289 --> 00:05:56,826
- Let me give you a hand tidying up.
- Oh, thank you, miss.
105
00:05:56,999 --> 00:06:00,331
You know, you needn't stand
on ceremony for Dr. Crane's father.
106
00:06:00,501 --> 00:06:04,118
- He prefers it if you're more informal.
- Oh, that's rather difficult for me.
107
00:06:04,295 --> 00:06:08,043
l'm accustomed to formality.
Besides, l find it's more professional.
108
00:06:08,215 --> 00:06:12,163
lt helps draw the line
between a family and its servant.
109
00:06:12,718 --> 00:06:15,837
- Are you referring to Niles and me?
- Well, that's none of my business.
110
00:06:16,012 --> 00:06:18,966
No, it's all right. We're together.
111
00:06:19,181 --> 00:06:21,339
He told me he'd been in love with me
for seven years,
112
00:06:21,516 --> 00:06:23,425
and l couldn't help
but fall head over heels.
113
00:06:23,601 --> 00:06:25,011
lt was like a fairy tale.
114
00:06:25,477 --> 00:06:29,473
Seven years? He sounds shy.
115
00:06:30,648 --> 00:06:32,605
Oh, he is.
116
00:06:32,774 --> 00:06:35,099
He was also married
for much of the time.
117
00:06:36,026 --> 00:06:39,892
- But now your prince is free.
- Almost. He married someone else.
118
00:06:40,571 --> 00:06:42,148
l see.
119
00:06:42,657 --> 00:06:44,565
No, you don't understand.
120
00:06:44,783 --> 00:06:47,653
Once that divorce goes through,
we'll be together forever.
121
00:06:48,118 --> 00:06:50,443
Well, l hope it's moving swiftly
through the courts.
122
00:06:50,662 --> 00:06:51,990
Oh, he hasn't filed yet.
123
00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:56,289
But when his wife thinks the time
is right, which is soon, he will.
124
00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,622
Well, not that she's in charge of us.
125
00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:00,619
Oh, look, l've given you
the wrong impression.
126
00:07:00,794 --> 00:07:04,244
Miss Moon, please understand
that this is not meant to be cruel.
127
00:07:05,797 --> 00:07:08,549
But l've witnessed much heartbreak
in my career,
128
00:07:08,717 --> 00:07:13,342
and l've come to know
that an employee-employer romance
129
00:07:13,512 --> 00:07:15,550
has little chance of success.
130
00:07:15,721 --> 00:07:18,721
The status relationship
will always exist.
131
00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:21,888
Thank goodness
l'm not as cynical as you are.
132
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:24,597
True love is stronger than status.
133
00:07:24,770 --> 00:07:27,094
l don't care what anyone says
or thinks.
134
00:07:27,271 --> 00:07:29,014
Niles and l are in love.
135
00:07:31,149 --> 00:07:35,016
Yeah, and don't spread that around.
lt's a secret.
136
00:07:38,196 --> 00:07:39,738
Next.
137
00:07:39,905 --> 00:07:42,312
[MUSlC PLAYS ON TV]
138
00:07:42,490 --> 00:07:43,818
Next.
139
00:07:43,991 --> 00:07:45,783
[WEAPONS FlRlNG ON TV]
140
00:07:45,952 --> 00:07:47,778
Next.
141
00:07:47,953 --> 00:07:50,787
Oh, Shark Week. At ease.
142
00:07:52,498 --> 00:07:53,577
Good day, all.
143
00:07:53,748 --> 00:07:56,452
Hey, Fras, how'd your lunch go
with that opera guy?
144
00:07:56,625 --> 00:07:59,496
Excellent, not only did Murchie
rave on and on
145
00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:01,917
about the bottle
of Umbrian wine l sent,
146
00:08:02,088 --> 00:08:06,167
but he intimated
that l was opera board timber.
147
00:08:06,341 --> 00:08:07,621
[CHUCKLES]
148
00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:10,291
Now all we have to do is continue
my charm offensive
149
00:08:10,469 --> 00:08:11,667
with the other board members.
150
00:08:11,845 --> 00:08:14,845
- Then might l suggest a party, sir?
- Oh, l'm way ahead of you this time.
151
00:08:15,014 --> 00:08:18,464
l was thinking
of a little post-opera soiree next week
152
00:08:18,641 --> 00:08:20,349
after the opening of Turandot.
153
00:08:20,559 --> 00:08:23,097
lf l may take the liberty, sir,
perhaps holding the party
154
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:27,349
prior to the opera might be easier
on the older guests.
155
00:08:27,565 --> 00:08:28,939
Yes, good thinking. Yes, yes.
156
00:08:29,107 --> 00:08:33,234
lt's a very nice spin
on my initial insight of the party.
157
00:08:33,443 --> 00:08:34,819
- You flatter me, sir.
- Ah.
158
00:08:34,987 --> 00:08:37,442
[DOORBELL RlNGS]
159
00:08:41,491 --> 00:08:43,981
FRASlER: Hello, Niles.
- Hello, Frasier.
160
00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:45,950
Ah, yes, Ferguson.
161
00:08:46,119 --> 00:08:47,946
FERGUSON: How do you do, sir?
NlLES: Very well.
162
00:08:48,121 --> 00:08:50,160
- May l take your coat, sir?
- Certainly.
163
00:08:56,001 --> 00:08:58,040
- Sherry, Dr. Crane?
- Oh, thank you, Ferguson,
164
00:08:58,211 --> 00:09:00,251
but as we speak, l have a bottle
of Veuve Clicquot
165
00:09:00,422 --> 00:09:03,256
chilling in my apartment.
And you know the old caution:
166
00:09:03,424 --> 00:09:06,589
Champagne after sherry
makes tummy grow wary.
167
00:09:08,344 --> 00:09:10,668
You have your brother's wit, sir.
168
00:09:15,641 --> 00:09:17,549
So, Niles,
you're awfully chipper today.
169
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,642
And why not?
Daphne and l are going out on a date.
170
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:25,892
Well, Niles, what if somebody
sees you and reports back to Mel?
171
00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:27,186
Mel be damned.
172
00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:30,393
Daphne and l are going to have
a romantic evening at my apartment.
173
00:09:30,568 --> 00:09:34,315
Not only that, she's going in my car,
in my backseat,
174
00:09:34,487 --> 00:09:37,488
under a pile of my coats
and blankets.
175
00:09:37,657 --> 00:09:39,115
[PHONE RlNGS]
176
00:09:39,283 --> 00:09:41,074
- That's my cell phone.
- Shall l?
177
00:09:41,242 --> 00:09:43,697
- Can he?
- Would you?
178
00:09:46,496 --> 00:09:47,693
Dr. Crane's line.
179
00:09:48,997 --> 00:09:52,117
- l'm ready.
NlLES: Oh, Daphne, you look ravishing.
180
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:53,951
Oh, thank you.
181
00:09:55,502 --> 00:09:56,961
lt's Mrs. Crane, sir.
182
00:10:02,758 --> 00:10:04,417
NlLES:
Hello, Mel.
183
00:10:04,593 --> 00:10:05,671
What?
184
00:10:06,177 --> 00:10:09,758
Wait a minute, l thought we agreed
24-hours notice. You can't just...
185
00:10:11,472 --> 00:10:14,508
All right, l'll see you then.
186
00:10:14,683 --> 00:10:16,177
FRASlER:
Everything all right, Niles?
187
00:10:16,393 --> 00:10:18,515
lt's Mel. She's having tea
with her sorority sisters
188
00:10:18,686 --> 00:10:20,678
and would like me to show up.
189
00:10:20,854 --> 00:10:22,478
Late, of course,
and preferably boorish.
190
00:10:22,647 --> 00:10:25,765
Oh, for Pete's sake, l thought
this was supposed to be over by now.
191
00:10:25,940 --> 00:10:29,309
Yes, well, so did l,
but as Mel so politely reminded me,
192
00:10:29,485 --> 00:10:31,608
if l want this divorce
to be quick and simple,
193
00:10:31,779 --> 00:10:34,482
l have to dance to her tune.
194
00:10:37,157 --> 00:10:39,233
l'm sorry.
You understand, don't you?
195
00:10:39,451 --> 00:10:42,119
- l guess so.
- That's my girl.
196
00:10:43,495 --> 00:10:47,906
- l will make this up to you. l promise.
- You better get going.
197
00:10:55,879 --> 00:10:57,207
You heard, didn't you?
198
00:10:58,047 --> 00:11:02,043
No, l don't need that.
l mean, l know he loves me.
199
00:11:02,258 --> 00:11:04,500
But it took him seven years
to tell me.
200
00:11:04,677 --> 00:11:08,626
His ex-wife walked all over him,
and now Mel's doing the same thing.
201
00:11:08,805 --> 00:11:10,464
What, is it gonna take
another seven years
202
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,927
before he stands up
for himself or for us?
203
00:11:13,099 --> 00:11:17,049
- Why do you suppose he hasn't?
- l don't know.
204
00:11:17,270 --> 00:11:19,807
For the first time,
l'm beginning to wonder if...
205
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:23,264
lf maybe
there are too many differences.
206
00:11:24,024 --> 00:11:27,190
Maybe he feels
he has too much to lose.
207
00:11:27,359 --> 00:11:30,859
Oh, God, Ferguson,
maybe you were right.
208
00:11:41,244 --> 00:11:43,118
[CORK POPS]
209
00:11:43,288 --> 00:11:44,782
[LlQUlD POURlNG]
210
00:11:44,956 --> 00:11:47,078
l hope everything meets
with your approval, sir.
211
00:11:47,249 --> 00:11:49,040
Oh, yes, indeed, indeed.
212
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,667
Where's Dad's chair?
213
00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:53,750
l took the liberty of removing it
for the party.
214
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,204
But Dad will be furious.
215
00:11:56,714 --> 00:11:59,833
And l completely forgot.
He'll be here,
216
00:12:00,008 --> 00:12:01,965
swigging from a can
and guessing women's weight.
217
00:12:02,135 --> 00:12:04,173
l'll be blackballed.
218
00:12:05,095 --> 00:12:07,384
Oh, Dad, listen, about tonight--
219
00:12:07,556 --> 00:12:09,464
Yeah, l'd love to hobnob
and whatnot,
220
00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,632
but the Town Car's waiting
to take me to the game.
221
00:12:11,808 --> 00:12:13,717
Thanks for the tickets, Fras.
222
00:12:14,018 --> 00:12:15,642
Fergie.
223
00:12:16,186 --> 00:12:18,261
Your meatloaf sandwich, sir.
224
00:12:18,814 --> 00:12:20,770
And your finger.
225
00:12:28,945 --> 00:12:31,151
- l hope you don't mind, sir.
FRASlER: Not at all.
226
00:12:31,323 --> 00:12:32,485
[DOORBELL RlNGS]
227
00:12:32,657 --> 00:12:35,361
Ferguson, positions.
228
00:12:36,659 --> 00:12:38,947
Oh, Niles, what are you doing here?
229
00:12:39,161 --> 00:12:40,820
Don't panic.
l'm not crashing your party.
230
00:12:40,996 --> 00:12:43,118
l'm here to pick up Daphne.
We're going to the mall.
231
00:12:43,289 --> 00:12:44,748
Really?
232
00:12:44,916 --> 00:12:47,157
Well, no chance
of running into Mel there.
233
00:12:47,376 --> 00:12:51,242
Should be a night to remember. We're
going someplace called The Limited.
234
00:12:52,837 --> 00:12:54,794
Well, Daphne,
why aren't you dressed?
235
00:12:55,005 --> 00:12:56,880
l'm not sure if l'm up
to going out tonight.
236
00:12:57,049 --> 00:12:59,290
l really hate all this sneaking around.
237
00:12:59,509 --> 00:13:01,252
lt's not sneaking around.
238
00:13:01,427 --> 00:13:04,961
We're gonna be out in public
at the Tacoma Mall.
239
00:13:05,388 --> 00:13:08,139
And the most important thing
is we'll be together.
240
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:13,134
All right. l suppose
that really is what matters.
241
00:13:13,352 --> 00:13:15,391
NlLES: Now, tell me again,
what are we going to eat?
242
00:13:15,562 --> 00:13:17,601
DAPHNE: Curly fries.
NlLES: Ooh.
243
00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:19,724
[DOORBELL RlNGS]
244
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,558
Good evening, and welcome
to the home of Dr. Frasier--
245
00:13:23,735 --> 00:13:25,644
FRASlER:
Oh, save it. lt's just Roz.
246
00:13:25,861 --> 00:13:29,727
- What are you doing here?
- Oh, your gift wrapping came in.
247
00:13:30,823 --> 00:13:32,151
l thought l just ordered a few.
248
00:13:32,324 --> 00:13:34,068
You were more generous
than you thought.
249
00:13:34,284 --> 00:13:35,992
FERGUSON: l'll put it in your room, sir.
- Yeah.
250
00:13:36,202 --> 00:13:38,278
You look like a gift giver.
251
00:13:38,495 --> 00:13:40,534
Roz, you put it in my room.
He's working.
252
00:13:40,705 --> 00:13:42,412
[DOORBELL RlNGS]
253
00:13:43,540 --> 00:13:46,660
Alan Murchie, lovely to see you.
254
00:13:46,877 --> 00:13:49,793
Likewise.
l don't think you've met my wife, Diane.
255
00:13:49,962 --> 00:13:51,041
Enchant�.
256
00:13:51,213 --> 00:13:53,620
And this is Henry Worth,
another board member.
257
00:13:53,798 --> 00:13:55,541
Henry. Lovely to meet you.
258
00:13:55,757 --> 00:13:58,248
FERGUSON: May l take your coats?
- Oh, thank you.
259
00:13:58,426 --> 00:13:59,885
Yeah.
260
00:14:00,053 --> 00:14:02,092
Frasier, isn't that
the colonel's old butler?
261
00:14:02,263 --> 00:14:03,756
Yes, Ferguson.
262
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:06,551
My sense of duty compelled me
to take him in
263
00:14:06,724 --> 00:14:07,886
after the colonel passed.
264
00:14:08,058 --> 00:14:12,636
Yes. We felt the same sense of duty
toward his art collection.
265
00:14:12,812 --> 00:14:15,728
Oh, that's very droll.
266
00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:17,973
Excuse me.
267
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:22,316
--collection. And the Family Pak
really is your best value.
268
00:14:22,485 --> 00:14:24,394
Roz, Roz, what are you doing
out here?
269
00:14:24,570 --> 00:14:26,728
l'm sure Mr. Worth
isn't interested in gift wrapping.
270
00:14:26,905 --> 00:14:28,482
Nonsense. She's delightful.
271
00:14:29,365 --> 00:14:31,108
Now, what kind of deal
would you give me
272
00:14:31,283 --> 00:14:33,191
if l bought a hundred rolls?
273
00:14:33,409 --> 00:14:34,488
l'd take off 20 percent.
274
00:14:34,660 --> 00:14:38,953
And what would you take off
if l bought 5000 rolls?
275
00:14:41,290 --> 00:14:43,033
Everything but my bracelets.
276
00:14:43,208 --> 00:14:44,832
[LAUGHlNG]
277
00:14:45,001 --> 00:14:47,871
Yes, sir.
278
00:14:53,799 --> 00:14:57,249
Ah! Ted and Lois.
Oh, please, come in.
279
00:14:57,427 --> 00:15:00,426
l hope you don't mind, but we had
an extra ticket, so we brought a friend.
280
00:15:00,595 --> 00:15:02,672
Well, of course.
The more the merrier.
281
00:15:02,848 --> 00:15:04,674
Good evening, Frasier.
282
00:15:04,891 --> 00:15:08,056
Mel, what a delightful surprise.
283
00:15:08,268 --> 00:15:10,224
l had no idea you knew the Fishers.
284
00:15:11,436 --> 00:15:13,513
Niles, look who's here.
285
00:15:14,523 --> 00:15:16,728
- Darling.
MEL: Niles.
286
00:15:16,899 --> 00:15:20,267
l didn't think l'd see you here tonight.
l thought you were working late.
287
00:15:20,735 --> 00:15:22,442
Oh, lucky me.
288
00:15:22,611 --> 00:15:25,315
No. Lucky me.
289
00:15:25,488 --> 00:15:29,070
Lucky all of us.
Please, won't you sit down?
290
00:15:29,492 --> 00:15:31,483
What are you doing here?
291
00:15:31,660 --> 00:15:33,948
Look, l didn't know
we were stopping by here on our way,
292
00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:36,076
so just put on your party face
and deal with it.
293
00:15:36,246 --> 00:15:37,953
Well, l'm sorry, l have plans.
294
00:15:38,122 --> 00:15:40,613
Yes, you do.
To be by your wife's side.
295
00:15:40,833 --> 00:15:42,161
Everybody good? Everybody happy?
296
00:15:42,334 --> 00:15:45,002
Let's try to respect the feelings
and long-held dreams of others.
297
00:15:45,169 --> 00:15:47,659
Don't worry, Frasier,
everything's going to be fine.
298
00:15:47,838 --> 00:15:51,751
Fine? Fine for whom?
ls that code? What does that mean?
299
00:15:53,175 --> 00:15:55,463
Daphne, Daphne, l'm so sorry.
300
00:15:55,635 --> 00:15:57,592
Listen, this party can't last more
than an hour,
301
00:15:57,762 --> 00:16:00,845
and after that, we'll have
the whole evening together. l promise.
302
00:16:01,014 --> 00:16:03,172
Please, don't make any more promises
you can't keep.
303
00:16:03,349 --> 00:16:05,637
Oh, Niles, come over here
and listen to Ted's funny joke
304
00:16:05,809 --> 00:16:07,517
about Communists and heaven.
305
00:16:07,727 --> 00:16:10,762
Oh, l'm laughing already.
306
00:16:12,022 --> 00:16:15,021
- Frasier, this party is a triumph.
- Oh, well...
307
00:16:15,190 --> 00:16:18,524
l shouldn't be telling you this,
but if my straw poll is any indication,
308
00:16:18,693 --> 00:16:21,184
we may be seeing you
at the next board meeting.
309
00:16:21,404 --> 00:16:25,400
Oh, well, l hope you don't think
that's why l did this.
310
00:16:25,573 --> 00:16:27,897
But it's certainly
a nice fringe benefit.
311
00:16:28,117 --> 00:16:32,030
l'm no farmer, Crane,
but l can smell manure a mile away.
312
00:16:32,912 --> 00:16:35,367
You'll be a welcome addition.
313
00:16:37,123 --> 00:16:38,664
Oh, Ferguson. Ferguson, listen.
314
00:16:38,874 --> 00:16:40,533
Make sure
that everyone has a champagne.
315
00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:44,409
l have a little toast in mind
that l daresay will seal the deal.
316
00:16:46,963 --> 00:16:50,545
By the by, don't make any plans
for New Year's Eve.
317
00:16:50,716 --> 00:16:53,337
Lo and l are having a blowout
at our Mercer lsland place.
318
00:16:53,510 --> 00:16:55,549
Well, that's a very generous offer,
but--
319
00:16:55,720 --> 00:16:56,834
Oh, we'd love to.
320
00:16:57,846 --> 00:16:59,838
lt'll give me a chance to wear
that new Valentino
321
00:17:00,014 --> 00:17:02,469
- l might be getting for Christmas.
- Miss Moon?
322
00:17:03,392 --> 00:17:05,717
Mel, may l see you for a moment?
323
00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:07,388
- Well, actually, l--
- No, thank you.
324
00:17:07,562 --> 00:17:09,470
Excuse us.
Excuse us just one second.
325
00:17:10,647 --> 00:17:12,639
New Year's Eve with you?
Are you out of your mind?
326
00:17:12,815 --> 00:17:13,894
Keep your voice down.
327
00:17:14,066 --> 00:17:16,603
Look, l have gone along
with this charade because l hurt you,
328
00:17:16,776 --> 00:17:18,935
but now you're just dragging it out
to be vindictive.
329
00:17:19,112 --> 00:17:22,527
- l'm not gonna tolerate it any longer.
- What're you gonna do about it?
330
00:17:22,697 --> 00:17:25,318
- Keep pushing me, you'll find out.
- Don't threaten me.
331
00:17:25,533 --> 00:17:28,532
You made a promise,
and you're going to keep it.
332
00:17:28,743 --> 00:17:31,364
Your wrap, madam.
Dr. Crane thanks you for coming.
333
00:17:31,537 --> 00:17:34,158
Ferguson, Ferguson,
what in blue blazes are you doing?
334
00:17:34,373 --> 00:17:36,199
Perhaps to spare you
some embarrassment, sir,
335
00:17:36,374 --> 00:17:37,998
- l took the liberty--
- Stop.
336
00:17:38,167 --> 00:17:41,665
You've been taking far too much liberty
with the liberty-taking. Please.
337
00:17:41,877 --> 00:17:43,538
Just see that everyone
has some champagne.
338
00:17:43,713 --> 00:17:45,041
Yes, sir.
339
00:17:45,214 --> 00:17:47,964
There's no need to leave.
l would like to propose a toast.
340
00:17:48,132 --> 00:17:50,883
NlLES: No, Mel, why don't you listen
for once? l'm through.
341
00:17:51,051 --> 00:17:53,458
MEL: l'll tell you when
you're through, you spineless twit,
342
00:17:53,636 --> 00:17:54,916
and you're not even close!
343
00:17:55,137 --> 00:17:57,842
Opera time! Opera time!
344
00:17:58,306 --> 00:17:59,634
On to the show.
345
00:18:00,474 --> 00:18:02,098
That's it, Mel.
l'm sick of these games.
346
00:18:02,267 --> 00:18:04,674
- Niles, don't make a scene.
- l don't care.
347
00:18:04,852 --> 00:18:08,102
l love Daphne and l'm not putting her
through this torture another second.
348
00:18:08,314 --> 00:18:10,886
This sham of a marriage is over.
349
00:18:15,151 --> 00:18:18,934
lt's all right, dear. We've known
for some time he doesn't deserve you.
350
00:18:19,112 --> 00:18:21,650
Well, you've seen
what l have to put up with.
351
00:18:21,865 --> 00:18:23,656
l've tried so hard. l really have.
352
00:18:23,825 --> 00:18:26,030
l don't know how you've put up
with him this long.
353
00:18:26,243 --> 00:18:27,571
- l just want out.
- Don't worry.
354
00:18:27,744 --> 00:18:29,819
l'll handle the divorce papers
personally.
355
00:18:29,995 --> 00:18:33,115
This jackass will be out of your life
by the end of the week.
356
00:18:33,332 --> 00:18:34,909
You mean it?
357
00:18:36,375 --> 00:18:37,917
See you around, Crane.
358
00:18:41,128 --> 00:18:43,334
l love you too.
359
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,041
Oh, come on, Frasier,
you don't wanna spend the evening
360
00:18:49,218 --> 00:18:50,332
with those snobs anyway.
361
00:18:50,510 --> 00:18:51,541
Yeah.
362
00:18:51,719 --> 00:18:55,253
- Coming, Roz?
- Yeah, l'll be right there.
363
00:18:57,849 --> 00:19:01,182
l'm just getting an early start
on the candy drive.
364
00:19:03,228 --> 00:19:06,975
Frasier, l'm sorry
l ruined your evening.
365
00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:08,931
That's all right, Niles.
366
00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:12,191
lt's a small price to pay
to finally see you and Daphne together.
367
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:16,569
lt's true. We're free. No more hiding.
368
00:19:16,737 --> 00:19:21,896
Where do you wanna go?
Dinner? Dancing? London? Paris?
369
00:19:22,116 --> 00:19:23,859
Why don't we go for a walk?
370
00:19:24,785 --> 00:19:28,366
- Even better.
FERGUSON: lf you'll allow me.
371
00:19:29,413 --> 00:19:32,579
- Thank you, Ferguson.
FERGUSON: My pleasure, sir.
372
00:19:36,377 --> 00:19:40,290
- Thank you, Ferguson.
- lt was my privilege, Ms. Moon.
373
00:19:48,302 --> 00:19:51,421
All right, Ferguson, we've got
some fences to mend with the board.
374
00:19:54,097 --> 00:19:56,255
What do we send,
and to whom do we send it?
375
00:19:56,474 --> 00:20:00,685
Actually, sir, l regret to inform you
that l must tender my resignation.
376
00:20:00,853 --> 00:20:03,177
Please, don't be upset
things didn't go well this evening.
377
00:20:03,354 --> 00:20:06,058
l'll make it up to you.
Send yourself something.
378
00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:12,775
Thank you, sir, but it's not you.
379
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:14,735
lt was your brother and Ms. Moon.
380
00:20:16,614 --> 00:20:20,396
His willingness
to break social rank has inspired me.
381
00:20:20,574 --> 00:20:26,113
And there' a certain Lady Westerfield
whose acquaintance l'd like to renew.
382
00:20:26,287 --> 00:20:29,572
Ah. True love and all that.
383
00:20:29,748 --> 00:20:33,447
Well, good luck, Ferguson.
384
00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:34,746
Thank you, sir.
385
00:20:34,918 --> 00:20:39,460
Now, if you'll excuse me,
l had rather a difficult evening.
386
00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:43,496
Think l'll just go take a sad soak
in the tub.
387
00:20:44,383 --> 00:20:50,088
Sir, after such an evening, it's not right
for a man to draw his own bath,
388
00:20:50,263 --> 00:20:54,259
so if l may take the liberty...
389
00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:58,341
Carry on, Ferguson.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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