All language subtitles for The.Nanny.S04E21.720p.HMAX.WEBRip.x264-GalaxyTV_track3_eng

I don't know why I applied
to Princeton.

I'll never get
in with my SAT scores.

Honey, you wanna get in,
forget your SAT scores.

Just attach your father's TRW.

Fran, I have to go
to an out-of-town college.

If I stay in this house,

I'm not gonna have
any social life.

Oh, it's the house?

It's amazing.
You win three Tonys

and suddenly everyone's
returning your phone calls.

Miss Fine, you'll never guess

who's agreed
to star in my new show.

[GASPS]
Don't tell me it's the woman

that was snubbed by the Academy

for Best Director for the
best
motion picture

ever made, "Yentl"?

Miss Fine, let me
ask you something.

If Barbra Streisand and
your mother were both drowning,

who would you save?

Well, I'd save my mother.

Barbra can walk on water.

I give up.
Well, I got Morgan Faulkner.

Oh, my God,
I love Morgan Faulkner.

Morgan Faulkner?

Ha!

I went to high school with her
when she was Marcy Feldman.

Well, she happens
to be a great actress.

And one hell of a magician.

She made half her nose disappear
between 10th and 11th grade.

Now, you behave yourself.
She'll be here in a few
minutes.

Oh, well, I'm going upstairs.

I can't stand
to be around people

who are ashamed of who they are.

Don't you even want to see her?

And have her find out I'm
a nanny? Have you gone mental?

We were the most popular girls

in high school
and very competitive.

- What happened between you?
- Well, I'm a maid

and she's on the cover of
Elle.
I'd say we have a winner.

[♪♪♪]

♪♪ She was working
in a bridal shop
in Flushing, Queens ♪♪

♪♪ 'Til her boyfriend
kicked her out ♪♪

♪♪ In one of those
crushing scenes ♪♪

♪♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪♪

♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪

♪♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing to the
Sheffield's door ♪♪

♪♪ She was there
to sell makeup,
but the father saw more ♪♪

♪♪ She had style!
She had flair!
She was there! ♪♪

♪♪ That's how
she became the nanny! ♪♪

♪♪ Who would have guessed that
the girl we've described ♪♪

♪♪ Was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed? ♪♪

♪♪ Now the father
finds her beguiling ♪♪

♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪

♪♪ And the kids
are actually smiling ♪♪

♪♪ Such joie de vivre! ♪♪

♪♪ She's the lady in red ♪♪

♪♪ When everybody else
is wearing tan ♪♪

♪♪ The flashy girl
from Flushing ♪♪

♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪

Sylvia has invited us over
for the Jewish holiday.

Now, is this the holiday
Miss Fine said

you can't eat all day
then stuff yourself,

or the one where you light
candles then stuff yourself,

or the one where you build
a straw hut then stuff
yourself?

I believe it's where you hide
crackers from small children

and then stuff yourself.

Ah. Passover.

You know, Maxwell, I don't
wanna
look a gift horse in the mouth,
but--

Then don't floss in a mirror.

Why is Nanny Fine hiding
from Morgan Faulkner?

Ugh. They were
at high school together

and Miss Fine's
a little embarrassed

about being a nanny.

Oh. What about you?

Aren't you embarrassed
about being a butler?

- I don't know Morgan
Faulkner.
- No. I mean, in general.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Morgan, do come in.

Oh, I am so thrilled
to be working with you.

Wait two weeks
and see if you say that.

Oh!

I'm his partner, C.C. Babcock.

It's a pleasure.

Wait five minutes
and see if you say that.

Oh...Miss Faulkner,
I am such a big fan.

I got your autograph
at the Whiskey Bar.

- The Whiskey Bar?
- I'm sorry. I don't
remember.

Oh, why would you?
I was never there.

Your daughter's very beautiful.

Is there a Mrs. Sheffield?

Are my ears burning?

Morgan, it's Fran.

Fran Fine.

From Hillcrest High.

Miss Fine,
Morgan meets so many people.

Well, why doesn't
she recognize me?

She's the one
that got everything changed.

[LAUGHS]

Oh, that Fran Fine.

Don't tell me
you're Mrs. Sheffield?

Well, let's just say, we don't
need to sign a piece of paper.

But the kids adore me.
I live here.

You fill in the blanks.

So you're the nanny.

And the blanks are filled.

[♪♪♪]

Ma, how come
you're cooking for 12

when Passover's a week away?

What Passover?

I did five minutes
of a Jane Fonda tape.

I feel lightheaded.

Ma, do you ever question

the choices
that you make in life?

Sometimes I'm sitting across
the table from your father...

- Yeah.
- ...and I look at his
face...

- Yeah?
- And I wonder,

is he gonna finish
that lamb chop?

I'm wondering
what Jane Fonda tape

you were exercising to?
"Klute"?

Ma, put the fork down
for two seconds.

I'm very upset about something.

Mr. Sheffield hired
Morgan Faulkner

to star in his new play.

Darling, what's bothering you?

That she's a big star
and you're a maid?

Mamaleh, don't look
into other people's windows.

You never know what
someone's life is truly
like.

You see the woman
across the alley?

For years,
I envied her fancy apartment,

and then, one day,
I realized,

she was born blind.

Well, what makes
you think that?

Her bedroom window
looks directly into ours

and she has never even looked.

Ma, she wasn't born blind.
She made herself that way.

[♪♪♪]

Mmm...

What's cooking?

Oh, I've been
experimenting with recipes

for your mother's seder.

I've made kreplach, knaidlach,
tsimmis and gribenes.

Yummy.

Boy, Niles, you're really
taking
this seriously, aren't you?

Oy, I've been
eating like a chazer.

My pants I can't zip

and when are you
getting married already?

You know, it takes a lot more

to being Jewish
than just cooking.

There's a whole other wiener
you gotta schnitzel, mister.

Where's Mr. Sheffield?

He's with Miss Fancy-Shmancy
movie star, big shot.

You know, this is getting scary.

Quick, eat a piece of ham.
Play a sport.

You're far more sanguine

about Miss Faulkner
than you were yesterday.

Well, first of all,
welcome back.

Second of all, I'm trying.

You know, I don't like
to look through windows.

Fine. All right. Thank you.

Just wait till you see

this marquee, Morgan.
It just went up.

My name better be above
the title.

Well, of course it is.

I wouldn't have it
any other way.

Excuse me.

Hi, Morgan.
I didn't know you were here.

Oh, I'm sorry.
Do you need to clean in here?

For your information,
I don't clean.

I'm not even a real nanny.

I'm in the witness
protection program.

Oh, come on, Fran,
you don't need to pretend.

It's just me, two-time Academy
Award winning Morgan Faulkner.

Did I mention
I just did a pilot?

Really? What airline?

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I--

I shouldn't
look through windows.

You know, your life
seems very glamorous,

but I'm sure
you live like a gypsy.

You don't even have a real home.

Well, actually,
I have a compound in Malibu.

But you're lonely.
You don't have any real
friends.

Well, I don't get to see
Demi and Uma as often

because I'm dating a Kennedy.

Does your mother live
at the compound?

Well, I hardly ever see her.

She moved to Boca.

Would you fill out this
lotto
card for me, please?

Fran, I got rejected
from Princeton and Vassar.

Oh, sweetie, come here.

Maggie, if it makes you feel
any better, I didn't even
go to college.

Really?

I didn't go to college either.

I know what that girl needs.

I just lost my assistant.
It's a great job. It's
exciting.

- She'll meet celebrities.
- Wait a minute.

You can't give
a kid like that a job.

Not when I've known you
since high school.

Can't you throw me a bone?

[LAUGHS]

[SOBBING]
I can't believe

Morgan took away
the only daughter I never had.

How many shiksa goddesses
do they think I got in me?

You know, for dessert
at your mother's Passover,

I thought I'd bring
some nice fresh fruit.

You're gonna slide a cheesecake
under that, aren't you?

Oh, you're not going to want

a rich dessert
after such a heavy meal?

Yeah, we are.

Niles, take a look
at this poster for the show.

Doesn't Morgan
look incredibly...

[WHISTLES]

...old, old.

Oh, I wanna see.

Oh, she looks gorgeous.

Oh, is it retouched?

No. Yes.

Oh, Maxwell, I just saw
the posters of Morgan.

- They are--
- Oh, C.C., C.C., ahem.

Miss Fine is a little
sensitive
about Morgan right now.

Oh, thank you.

Doesn't she look stunning?

I mean, hot, sexy.

Why are you being so hurtful?

I've got nothing.

I make minimum wage.

I don't have a man in my life.

I'm probably gonna die alone
like a dog.

Here.

Oh, Nanny Fine, I am so sorry.

Oh, I feel terrible.

Got guilt?

Oh, I would have made
such a good mother.

Oh, look at this.
It's almost 9:00.

What kind of
an irresponsible idiot

keeps a kid out on
a school night? I'll never
know.

All right, I'm going to
Eric's.
Be back in a couple of hours.

Okay, honey. Have fun.

Miss Fine, do you think
your anger and dismay

could possibly
be coming from a belief

that Morgan has something
that you haven't?

Like what?
Other than it all?

This isn't about me and Morgan.

Ever since Maggie took this
job,
I never see her.

I have nothing to do all day.

You could take care
of my other two children.

No, I'm distancing myself
from them.

I owe them money.

Oh, Dad,
this job is so exciting.

Morgan is fabulous.
I'm learning so much from her.

She's killing me!

Now, now, Miss Fine,

this job is the best thing
that could have happened to
her.

Cool. Because I'm going
to Europe with her

and I'm not going to college.

She's killing me!

[♪♪♪]

Look at this.

I just figured out how to add
10 more seats in the theater.

Lose the damn wheelchair row.

My daughter is
not giving up college

to go to Europe
as Morgan's gofer.

Why would anyone want
to spend their entire life

waiting on someone hand and foot
like a bloody lackey?

For the glory, sir.

Would you look at the beak
Morgan had in high school?

You know,
her first acting job

was sitting
on Baretta's shoulder.

[BOTH LAUGH]

How is Margaret gonna
make anything of herself

if she doesn't go to college?

I know four years at Oxford
opened a lot of doors for me.

[WINDOW SQUEAKING]

If Margaret
isn't gonna listen to me,

I'm gonna go down there
and make Morgan fire her.

Well, you could
lose her forever if you do
that.

- Oh, C.C., my daughter isn't--
- Not the string bean. Morgan.

Mr. Sheffield,
I'll go and take care of
it.

I mean, you're not gonna
get Morgan to fire Maggie.

The whole concept
of firing eludes you.

Look who you've got
on the payroll:

Harpo, Groucho and Drain-o.

[♪♪♪]

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Would you please tell this guy
that I am not a hooker?

It's okay. I know her.

FRAN: Hmph.

Oh, I'm sorry.
Did you wanna come in?

Yes.

Look, I'm gonna make
this short and sweet.

Oh, "Evita" is playing
on pay-per-view.

Can we talk in a couple hours?

Fran, I need
to get down to rehearsal.

What's on your mind?

Well, Mr. Sheffield wants
Maggie to go to college.

He does not want her
schlepping around after you.

Personally, I think
she's a blond heiress

with legs up to here

so higher education
isno es necesito.

But it's your job
to make Mr. Sheffield happy.

Oh, from your mouth
to God's ears.

He is cute.

And impotent, a tragic irony.

God, this takes me
right back to high school.

I can see why
we never got along.

Well, you were always
acting superior to me,

bossing me around all the time.

Oh, that is ridiculous.

Zip me up.

[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

- Get that.
- Oh, wait a minute.

We're going right back
into our old patterns.

You don't want cracked crab?

Oh, maybe this one last time.

Mmm. Yummy.

Fran, I don't know
what the big deal is.

Maggie won't be
an assistant forever.

She'll make connections.
She'll go places.

If I'd listened to my father,

I'd be working
in that bridal shop in
Flushing.

Well, you know,
you and me, we got out.

But Maggie is not the mover
and shaker that we are.

- Hi.
- Sweetie.

Oh, hi, angel.

Oh, this job is so cool.

Today, I met Woody Allen.

- Oh, is that exciting?
- I know.

You stay away from him.

Now, listen, honey,
I know that you think

that this job beats
going to college,

but I just hope that someday
you don't regret it.

Well, how do I know
I'm gonna regret it?

I can't dwell on
all the negative,

horrible things that
might happen in the future.

I keep forgetting
you're not Jewish.

Crab?

[♪♪♪]

Happy Pesach!

- So did we say that right?
- Beautiful.

Look, I hope this brisket
goes
with what you're serving.

Oh, it's perfect
with potato latkes.

Assuming that you brought some.

I just want to thank you,
Silvia, for inviting me.

Oh, please, Niles,
you're like family.

Is there anything else I can do?

Well, you prepared the food,
I guess it's only right

that you have the pleasure
of serving it too.

Would you start
with the gefilte fish?

And maybe you'll make
a little radish rosette?

Sweetheart, before
you make yourself comfortable,

would you bring Uncle Morty
his holiday hair?

Hi, everybody.
Mr. Sheffield, Happy Passover.

Miss Fine, where's Margaret?
Why isn't she with you?

Well, let's see,
going to a club with Johnny
Depp

or sucking on whitefish bones?

Oh, I see. She's gonna
finish out the day,

then she's fired
and going to college?

Oh, well, actually,

I sort of let her
make that decision.

You what?!
Are you out of your mind?

All right. Tomorrow,
I'll fire her. But first,
I'll practice on you.

Shh!

This is the holiday
where we don't yell

and then stuff ourselves.

"Why on this night
do we eat bitter herbs?"

"To symbolize the bitter

and cruel way
we were treated in the
pharaoh."

"Why on this night do we dip
our foods in saltwater?"

"To remind us
of the tears we've shed."

"Why on this night
do we recline on a pillow?"

"Because once we were slaves
and now we are a free people."

Oh, that was beautiful,
sweetheart.

You forgot the last question.

Oh. "When is Daddy gonna marry
my daughter already?"

That question was
to remind us of my suffering.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Why don't I get that?

Would you?

If she thinks I'm coming
for Rosh Hashanah,

she's got another thing coming.

Hi.

- Margaret.
- Maggie.

What are you doing here?
Why aren't you working?

Actually, I quit.
I thought about what Fran
said.

Oh, honey. What did I say?

Well, you know, how I'm
a blond heiress, and I
needed--

Fast forward. Fast forward.

But that I don't want to
regret
not going to college someday.

Ohh...

Did you tape "Evita"?

- I'm so glad, sweetheart.
- Here. Sit down.

You're rehired, Harpo.

You know what?
She is such a slave driver.

I walk in there,
she wants me to turn around,

drive to the airport
in rush hour

to pick up Barbra Streisand
and James--

Brolin? Give me the keys!

Give me the keys!
Give me the keys!

Oh, it's the miracle
of Passover!

The Messiah is coming!

[ALL GROANING]

Does everyone eat like this

on the Jewish holiday,
Miss Fine?

Why do you think we wandered
the desert for 40 years?

We were walking off the meal.

I'll never eat again.

I'm so full.

I can't even move.

You know, call me crazy,

but I could go
for a little sweet.

You know, I could--

I could go for a little
piece
of cheesecake.

NILES:
Oh, I made some strudel.

GRACE: You know,
I could have some napoleons.

[♪♪♪]