Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
3
00:00:38,208 --> 00:00:39,666
{\an8} All across the world,
4
00:00:39,666 --> 00:00:42,250
{\an8}and maybe ever since
the beginning of time,
5
00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:45,958
{\an8}different cultures had different ways
of celebrating a kid coming of age.
6
00:00:47,666 --> 00:00:49,000
{\an8}There's the quinceañera.
7
00:00:50,041 --> 00:00:52,083
{\an8}-There's Sweet 16.
8
00:00:52,083 --> 00:00:54,583
{\an8} There's also something
called land diving.
9
00:00:55,083 --> 00:00:57,875
My dad told me that
in the Brazilian Amazon,
10
00:00:57,875 --> 00:01:00,166
there's this thing called
a bullet ant initiation
11
00:01:00,166 --> 00:01:03,375
where fire ants crawl all over your hands
and bite you.
12
00:01:03,375 --> 00:01:06,083
And if you can handle the pain,
you're ready to be a man.
13
00:01:06,083 --> 00:01:08,333
I told him if he thinks that sounds bad,
14
00:01:09,625 --> 00:01:11,875
try being a girl in middle school.
15
00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:17,541
Everyone has their own thing.
16
00:01:19,375 --> 00:01:20,625
And we have ours.
17
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,625
- Va-y'chal Moshe...
18
00:01:30,625 --> 00:01:33,083
At a Bar or Bat Mitzvah,
when you're 13,
19
00:01:33,083 --> 00:01:36,333
you step before friends,
family, and elders of the temple
20
00:01:36,333 --> 00:01:37,750
and read from the Torah.
21
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:40,916
Then, there's usually a party.
22
00:01:40,916 --> 00:01:43,500
All right, mishpachah,
23
00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:48,375
please say hello
to our newest and most fabulous adult,
24
00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:52,458
Stacy Friedman!
25
00:01:54,666 --> 00:01:57,333
Your Bat Mitzvah
is the first day of your adult life,
26
00:01:57,333 --> 00:02:01,583
and everyone knows an iconic adult life
hinges on how it starts.
27
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,208
♪ I don't care, I love it ♪
28
00:02:06,208 --> 00:02:07,458
{\an8} The theme.
29
00:02:08,041 --> 00:02:09,791
- The food.
- Can I get one?
30
00:02:09,791 --> 00:02:11,333
The entrance video.
31
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,541
It all tells a story.
32
00:02:14,041 --> 00:02:15,833
Who do I want to be?
33
00:02:15,833 --> 00:02:19,833
Will I have amazing lifelong friends
like Lydia Rodriguez Katz?
34
00:02:20,958 --> 00:02:26,708
Nothing before that day matters
because that was the old you, the kid you.
35
00:02:27,333 --> 00:02:28,791
Now you're an adult.
36
00:02:29,375 --> 00:02:32,458
So who cares if two years ago
you accidentally peed yourself
37
00:02:32,458 --> 00:02:35,375
during a field trip and had to get
a secret dry pants delivery
38
00:02:35,375 --> 00:02:37,458
from your awesome older sister Ronnie?
39
00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:40,041
This is a hypothetical situation
of course.
40
00:02:40,625 --> 00:02:41,541
♪ I love it ♪
41
00:02:42,291 --> 00:02:44,083
Go Stacy! That's my sister!
42
00:02:44,083 --> 00:02:46,291
And what better way
to kick off adulthood
43
00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:48,500
than with the hottest guy
in seventh grade?
44
00:02:48,500 --> 00:02:49,625
♪ I love it ♪
45
00:02:55,750 --> 00:03:02,333
♪ You keep me under your spell ♪
46
00:03:02,333 --> 00:03:04,041
Andy, what are you doing?
47
00:03:04,666 --> 00:03:09,666
Stacy, I've loved you since the first time
I saw you in the temple's Purim Pageant.
48
00:03:09,666 --> 00:03:13,166
You were the finest Queen Esther
I ever laid eyes on.
49
00:03:13,166 --> 00:03:17,791
Is it okay if I officially signify me
being your boyfriend by giving you a kiss?
50
00:03:21,625 --> 00:03:23,625
Consent given, Andy Goldfarb.
51
00:03:27,500 --> 00:03:29,250
- Stacy!
52
00:03:31,208 --> 00:03:33,500
Stacy,
we're gonna be late. Let's go.
53
00:03:38,041 --> 00:03:40,041
- I know you can hear me.
54
00:03:40,041 --> 00:03:43,625
One second,
I'm flossing like you tell me to!
55
00:03:43,625 --> 00:03:46,250
- Now I'm gurgling.
- Well, hurry up!
56
00:03:46,250 --> 00:03:48,458
- You too, Ronnie!
- I'm ready!
57
00:03:48,458 --> 00:03:50,958
You always say that. Never ready.
58
00:03:50,958 --> 00:03:53,708
- Ugh. Fine you got me. I'm not ready.
- Yankees are winning.
59
00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:55,750
That's what you're wearing?
60
00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:58,375
Yeah, I don't even know who this kid is.
I'm not gonna wear a suit.
61
00:03:58,375 --> 00:04:01,333
It's a junior high friend.
We have to get to know those parents too.
62
00:04:01,333 --> 00:04:03,833
I don't want to get to know 'em.
I liked when they were little.
63
00:04:03,833 --> 00:04:06,291
All we had to know was them
and the trampoline park guy.
64
00:04:06,291 --> 00:04:07,625
Ronnie, we're gonna be late!
65
00:04:07,625 --> 00:04:09,958
I'll be ready when Stacy's ready, Mom.
It's all good.
66
00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:14,250
Hey, Andy, of course I'll share
a matzo ball soup with you.
67
00:04:18,208 --> 00:04:19,791
Hi, Andy. I like your yarmulke.
68
00:04:19,791 --> 00:04:22,333
I didn't know you were going
to the Bat Mitzvah tonight, that's cool.
69
00:04:22,333 --> 00:04:23,958
Honey, what are you looking for?
70
00:04:23,958 --> 00:04:25,208
I can't find my earring.
71
00:04:25,208 --> 00:04:27,000
Oh, good luck.
72
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:30,125
Keep looking, baby.
Keep looking. Take your time.
73
00:04:30,125 --> 00:04:31,458
Stacy!
74
00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:33,083
Sorry, I'm coming!
75
00:04:44,125 --> 00:04:45,375
Those are cool.
76
00:04:45,375 --> 00:04:48,416
- Mom will never let you wear them, though.
- She won't even notice.
77
00:04:48,416 --> 00:04:50,791
And if she does,
I'll put on a sad show for Dad.
78
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:52,583
Oh, she'll notice. She'll hate them.
79
00:04:52,583 --> 00:04:56,208
And Dad will feel bad, but ultimately
be too afraid to stand up to Mom.
80
00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:57,875
I've known them longer than you.
81
00:05:00,041 --> 00:05:03,500
Um, excuse me,
what are those things on your feet?
82
00:05:03,500 --> 00:05:06,083
Lydia's mom bought us each a pair,
so we could twin.
83
00:05:06,083 --> 00:05:07,458
What's twin?
84
00:05:07,458 --> 00:05:09,500
Wearing the same thing.
It's very seventh grade.
85
00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,333
Take them off. You look like a stripper.
86
00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:14,083
- Mom, you can't say that.
- Yeah, Mom. You're gonna get cancelled.
87
00:05:14,083 --> 00:05:15,125
Oh boy.
88
00:05:15,125 --> 00:05:17,458
Take them off or lose your phone.
89
00:05:25,958 --> 00:05:26,791
Oh.
90
00:05:29,375 --> 00:05:31,500
No, you can't. Just take them off.
91
00:05:31,500 --> 00:05:32,916
Everyone in the car.
92
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:35,583
Thirty seconds or there's going
to be no food left at this thing.
93
00:05:35,583 --> 00:05:37,458
You're the one who's not ready.
We're ready.
94
00:05:37,458 --> 00:05:40,750
- I don't know where my earring is.
- Babe, did you look everywhere? Honestly?
95
00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:43,083
'Cause if you look hard enough,
you can find it.
96
00:05:43,083 --> 00:05:44,625
Why would you do that to me?
97
00:05:44,625 --> 00:05:46,666
Because I knew the girls needed more time.
98
00:05:46,666 --> 00:05:48,875
I also... I don't want to go
to this thing at all.
99
00:05:48,875 --> 00:05:50,791
- You guys are the worst.
- Yeah. I love you. Okay.
100
00:05:50,791 --> 00:05:52,333
Come on, Mom, just let her wear the shoes.
101
00:05:52,333 --> 00:05:54,625
It's not fair to Lydia
to make her wear them by herself.
102
00:05:54,625 --> 00:05:57,708
Okay. You're going to hate them
in two minutes.
103
00:05:58,458 --> 00:05:59,708
You're welcome.
104
00:05:59,708 --> 00:06:00,958
Thank you. Love you.
105
00:06:07,708 --> 00:06:10,125
- Whoa. Ow!
- Stacy!
106
00:06:10,125 --> 00:06:11,625
I'm coming!
107
00:06:12,750 --> 00:06:13,958
Ugh, fine.
108
00:06:18,541 --> 00:06:19,916
Move, child!
109
00:06:19,916 --> 00:06:21,041
Coming, sorry!
110
00:06:21,041 --> 00:06:23,000
- Oh yeah!
- Oh, nice job.
111
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:25,416
Taking after Dad
with the dress clothes and sneakers.
112
00:06:25,416 --> 00:06:27,625
Comfort always
comes first, sweetie.
113
00:06:29,583 --> 00:06:32,666
- There she is!
- She's limping. Hi, sweetheart!
114
00:06:32,666 --> 00:06:35,833
- Hi, Lyd!
- Lydia, Lydia encyclopedia.
115
00:06:35,833 --> 00:06:36,833
Hi, guys!
116
00:06:36,833 --> 00:06:38,458
Nice shoes. You look super cute, Lydia.
117
00:06:38,458 --> 00:06:40,958
Oh, thanks, Ron Ron.
Stacy and I are twinning.
118
00:06:40,958 --> 00:06:41,958
We heard.
119
00:06:41,958 --> 00:06:43,625
Hmm. Not anymore.
120
00:06:44,291 --> 00:06:45,875
- You took yours off.
- I got you.
121
00:06:45,875 --> 00:06:49,041
- Oh, thank you. I couldn't feel my feet.
- Mom and Dad know we're taking you?
122
00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:52,333
Well, I told my mom, and then she told
Dad's lawyer, so we're good to go.
123
00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:56,250
Nice!
124
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,750
Ugh! Dad, can you turn this song off?
It's embarrassing.
125
00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:02,000
Why is it embarrassing?
No one's around to hear it.
126
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,083
Oh my God! You're humiliating me!
127
00:07:04,083 --> 00:07:07,041
All right! I'll turn it off. Jesus.
128
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:12,000
I turned it off, guys!
What are we still upset about?
129
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:14,958
Their watching sad videos
to see who can cry first.
130
00:07:16,125 --> 00:07:19,625
You're trying to cry. That is so bizarre.
131
00:07:22,791 --> 00:07:25,708
Ugh! You're so freaking good at this game.
I hate it.
132
00:07:25,708 --> 00:07:27,583
Everybody in this house needs a shrink.
133
00:07:27,583 --> 00:07:28,791
Yeah, you need two.
134
00:07:28,791 --> 00:07:29,708
Ten.
135
00:07:29,708 --> 00:07:31,708
That's nice.
136
00:07:31,708 --> 00:07:34,250
Everyone be normal. We're going to temple.
137
00:07:34,250 --> 00:07:35,458
Here's your music.
138
00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:47,125
Make some noise, mishpachah!
139
00:07:49,416 --> 00:07:51,250
Woohoo!
140
00:07:51,250 --> 00:07:53,500
It's Devin's B'nai Mitzvah!
141
00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:57,666
They're becoming an adult.
Let's hear it for Devin!
142
00:07:57,666 --> 00:08:00,500
We've been pushing all the teachers
to assign more homework.
143
00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:03,625
If we want to prepare our kids
for this world, we gotta start 'em early.
144
00:08:03,625 --> 00:08:05,416
India's been kicking our ass.
145
00:08:05,416 --> 00:08:07,625
- I'm always telling my son, Marvin--
- I'm sorry.
146
00:08:07,625 --> 00:08:10,791
Can I interrupt you for one second?
I think this is on behalf of the table.
147
00:08:10,791 --> 00:08:14,583
We came here
to enjoy chicken and fish tonight
148
00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:17,458
and maybe have a few drinks,
so could you stop talking?
149
00:08:17,958 --> 00:08:19,958
♪ I want your stupid love ♪
150
00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:20,875
Thank you.
151
00:08:21,750 --> 00:08:22,666
Wow!
152
00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:31,416
This is such a classic.
Have you watched Leprechaun in the Hood?
153
00:08:31,416 --> 00:08:32,916
Dude, that's a masterpiece.
154
00:08:32,916 --> 00:08:37,041
We know. We've seen it. It was awful.
Can you just let us watch our movie?
155
00:08:37,041 --> 00:08:38,291
Bye!
156
00:08:38,958 --> 00:08:39,916
That hurt.
157
00:08:41,625 --> 00:08:43,375
- We've seen that?
- No.
158
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:46,416
Okay, I love this Carnivale theme,
159
00:08:46,416 --> 00:08:48,958
but your Candyland theme
is gonna be the best of the year.
160
00:08:48,958 --> 00:08:52,625
Oh, until your New York theme
puts the entire school to shame!
161
00:08:52,625 --> 00:08:54,166
If my parents let me have it.
162
00:08:54,166 --> 00:08:56,125
Did your dad talk to DJ Schmuley yet?
163
00:08:56,125 --> 00:08:59,625
Let me hear you scream,
"DJ Schmuley is my king!"
164
00:08:59,625 --> 00:09:01,875
DJ Schmuley is my king!
165
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:04,833
- He's already been booked. We got it!
- Sweet!
166
00:09:06,583 --> 00:09:08,458
Looking nice, ladies!
167
00:09:08,458 --> 00:09:09,708
- Hi, guys.
- Hi.
168
00:09:09,708 --> 00:09:11,625
Can you believe
we're becoming adults this year?
169
00:09:11,625 --> 00:09:12,583
- No.
- Yeah.
170
00:09:12,583 --> 00:09:15,041
My mom actually let me shave
my legs this afternoon.
171
00:09:15,041 --> 00:09:17,333
First time. So magical.
172
00:09:17,333 --> 00:09:18,833
Oh, I'm so proud of you, Nikki!
173
00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:21,916
It burns so bad right now, like somebody
wiped wasabi all over my shins.
174
00:09:21,916 --> 00:09:23,250
Oh.
175
00:09:23,250 --> 00:09:24,625
Oh my God.
176
00:09:24,625 --> 00:09:27,458
Why do Kym, Anya,
and Megan always look so cool?
177
00:09:27,458 --> 00:09:29,083
Are those birds rescued?
178
00:09:29,083 --> 00:09:31,000
- Say what?
- They better be.
179
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,291
- They scare me.
- Yeah, you know what else is scary?
180
00:09:33,291 --> 00:09:36,958
Nikki's mom is allowing Ronnie and Zaara
to drink alcohol!
181
00:09:36,958 --> 00:09:39,375
One, two, three. Woo!
182
00:09:42,958 --> 00:09:44,708
- Okay, let me hide those.
183
00:09:44,708 --> 00:09:47,208
Yeah, she's trying to be like a cool mom.
It's really weird.
184
00:09:47,208 --> 00:09:48,541
Let's go!
185
00:09:50,083 --> 00:09:53,458
Oh my God,
Andy Goldfarb looks so cute tonight.
186
00:09:55,666 --> 00:09:56,708
♪ Let's go ♪
187
00:09:59,333 --> 00:10:02,041
Do you realize
that one day he will be mine,
188
00:10:02,041 --> 00:10:03,833
and you will have a cool boyfriend too,
189
00:10:03,833 --> 00:10:07,333
and then we'll have a joint wedding
and move to adjoining lofts in Tribeca?
190
00:10:07,333 --> 00:10:09,041
In Taylor Swift's building?
191
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:10,375
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
192
00:10:11,416 --> 00:10:12,375
I'm gonna talk to him.
193
00:10:12,375 --> 00:10:13,750
- What?
- I'm ready.
194
00:10:13,750 --> 00:10:16,250
You should, Stace. Yeah, you got this.
195
00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:17,291
Come with me, please.
196
00:10:17,291 --> 00:10:18,250
- Yeah.
- Let's go.
197
00:10:18,250 --> 00:10:20,083
Go, go, go. You got this.
198
00:10:20,083 --> 00:10:21,333
Gang way!
199
00:10:21,333 --> 00:10:23,000
Hey, wait for me!
200
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,083
- No! You're embarrassing me.
- Yes!
201
00:10:28,750 --> 00:10:32,208
♪ I don't eat, I don't sleep ♪
202
00:10:32,208 --> 00:10:36,833
♪ I do nothing but think of you ♪
203
00:10:38,041 --> 00:10:40,041
♪ You keep me under your spell ♪
204
00:10:40,041 --> 00:10:41,500
♪ You keep me under your... ♪
205
00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,583
Hey, Stacy.
206
00:10:44,375 --> 00:10:45,458
I like your kicks.
207
00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:50,916
Andy, smile!
208
00:10:52,833 --> 00:10:53,958
Finish him!
209
00:11:01,041 --> 00:11:04,458
Why would Mateo do that?
That was so uncalled for.
210
00:11:04,458 --> 00:11:05,458
Oh, sorry.
211
00:11:05,458 --> 00:11:06,791
Completely. Sorry.
212
00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:09,416
Why does Andy hang out
with that Italian exchange student anyway?
213
00:11:09,416 --> 00:11:10,750
I think he's Ecuadorian.
214
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:13,458
Whatever. I heard he has a girlfriend
back home. She's in college.
215
00:11:13,458 --> 00:11:15,541
Um, no. I think that's, like, illegal.
216
00:11:17,625 --> 00:11:19,166
- Oh my God!
217
00:11:20,291 --> 00:11:22,000
- Sorry.
- What's wrong with you?
218
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,375
- Why would you do that? So embarrassing.
- I'm sorry.
219
00:11:24,375 --> 00:11:27,541
All right, everybody, make some noise!
220
00:11:27,541 --> 00:11:32,416
♪ If you don't wanna see me
Dancing with somebody ♪
221
00:11:35,416 --> 00:11:37,375
♪ If you wanna believe... ♪
222
00:11:37,375 --> 00:11:40,333
Come on, let's dance, everybody! Come on!
223
00:11:41,958 --> 00:11:45,208
♪ Don't show up, don't come out ♪
224
00:11:45,916 --> 00:11:49,000
♪ Don't start caring about me now ♪
225
00:11:51,583 --> 00:11:54,333
- Let me hear you scream, Schmu...
- Ley!
226
00:11:54,333 --> 00:11:55,666
- Schmu--
- Ley!
227
00:11:55,666 --> 00:11:56,916
- Schmu, Schmu--
- Ley!
228
00:11:56,916 --> 00:11:59,083
Why does everybody like this idiot?
229
00:11:59,083 --> 00:12:00,750
- He's the best!
- The best.
230
00:12:00,750 --> 00:12:05,166
- You've been officially Schmulitized!
231
00:12:06,583 --> 00:12:08,458
Thank you family
for joining us today.
232
00:12:10,291 --> 00:12:12,500
Let me take you all on a journey.
233
00:12:12,500 --> 00:12:15,500
Picture this. My entrance video starts...
234
00:12:16,333 --> 00:12:19,125
Which, as we know,
sets the tone for the entire Bat Mitzvah.
235
00:12:19,125 --> 00:12:21,083
- Mm-hmm.
236
00:12:21,083 --> 00:12:23,083
- Ugh, Ronnie!
- Girls, come on.
237
00:12:23,083 --> 00:12:27,375
Anyway, I descend the stairs
of a private yacht on the Hudson River
238
00:12:27,375 --> 00:12:29,416
to cheers and fireworks.
239
00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:30,666
Whoa.
240
00:12:30,666 --> 00:12:33,166
Then! Oh, who's that zipping by
on a jet ski?
241
00:12:33,750 --> 00:12:36,791
Why that's international recording artist
Olivia Rodrigo.
242
00:12:36,791 --> 00:12:38,791
Wait, how we gonna pay for this?
243
00:12:38,791 --> 00:12:39,708
Oh, we have ideas.
244
00:12:39,708 --> 00:12:41,250
They... they got ideas, honey.
245
00:12:41,250 --> 00:12:42,458
Okay.
246
00:12:43,583 --> 00:12:46,541
No. Wait. No. The old guy
was supposed to be for your dad.
247
00:12:46,541 --> 00:12:47,833
Oh no. Just keep going.
248
00:12:49,708 --> 00:12:50,541
- There.
- Okay.
249
00:12:50,541 --> 00:12:52,666
Oh, this is amazing.
250
00:12:52,666 --> 00:12:54,458
- Shut up, Ronnie.
- No, you shut up.
251
00:12:54,458 --> 00:12:55,583
I'll kill you, Ronnie.
252
00:12:55,583 --> 00:12:57,375
Not if I stab you first!
253
00:12:57,375 --> 00:12:58,666
Oh, that's... that's nice.
254
00:12:58,666 --> 00:13:02,333
Oh my God, this is important!
I'm becoming a freaking woman, everyone!
255
00:13:02,333 --> 00:13:05,750
Okay, woman. All you should worry about
right now is your mitzvah project
256
00:13:05,750 --> 00:13:07,250
and practicing your Haftarah.
257
00:13:07,250 --> 00:13:09,166
- Mm-hmm.
- That's not important!
258
00:13:10,916 --> 00:13:14,625
I mean, it is important to you
and other old people and God and stuff.
259
00:13:14,625 --> 00:13:17,291
But to me, the party is important.
260
00:13:17,291 --> 00:13:20,416
If this doesn't go well,
I could end up like Kate Kossman.
261
00:13:20,416 --> 00:13:22,208
You are not gonna end up
like Kate Kossman.
262
00:13:22,208 --> 00:13:23,583
Who's Kate Kossman?
263
00:13:23,583 --> 00:13:27,291
Oh, she had this terrible medieval themed
Bat Mitzvah called Kate Kossman Knights,
264
00:13:27,291 --> 00:13:29,625
not realizing
the initials spelled out KKK.
265
00:13:29,625 --> 00:13:31,666
Yeah, no, I could see
that being a problem. Okay.
266
00:13:31,666 --> 00:13:34,750
So now, she just sits alone in
the cafeteria sewing friendship bracelets
267
00:13:34,750 --> 00:13:38,250
for literally no one
because she has no friends.
268
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:39,625
That sounds a little dramatic.
269
00:13:39,625 --> 00:13:43,291
Oh, so you think you shouldn't be
punished for promoting the KKK.
270
00:13:43,291 --> 00:13:45,750
Wow, Mom,
didn't realize you supported racism.
271
00:13:45,750 --> 00:13:46,750
Oh boy.
272
00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:47,833
Hear me out.
273
00:13:47,833 --> 00:13:50,916
You're always saying how my Bat Mitzvah
determines the rest of my life.
274
00:13:50,916 --> 00:13:53,041
And I think Dua Lipa
would make my life perfect.
275
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:56,625
No. No famous pop stars,
no yachts, no sailboats even.
276
00:13:56,625 --> 00:13:59,250
That's so unfair!
Ronnie got a baked potato bar at hers!
277
00:13:59,250 --> 00:14:02,666
Listen, when I got Bar Mitzvahed,
we had a party in Grandma's basement.
278
00:14:02,666 --> 00:14:04,750
We all split, like, this giant matzo ball.
279
00:14:04,750 --> 00:14:05,666
That was the fun.
280
00:14:05,666 --> 00:14:07,958
You know what the theme was? Being Jewish.
281
00:14:07,958 --> 00:14:10,750
Just practice your prayers
and write your speech already.
282
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:13,166
Oh, I've been doing that Mr. Friedman.
It's all covered.
283
00:14:13,166 --> 00:14:15,416
You're writing Stacy's speech?
284
00:14:15,416 --> 00:14:18,041
- You know I'm not good at writing.
- English is her worst subject.
285
00:14:18,041 --> 00:14:19,291
It's really bad.
286
00:14:19,291 --> 00:14:21,416
- Stacy, that is so not okay.
- It's fine.
287
00:14:21,416 --> 00:14:24,583
She's gonna do my entrance video.
I know she'll crush it. Don't worry.
288
00:14:25,750 --> 00:14:27,916
Can I at least have a virgin mojito bar?
289
00:14:27,916 --> 00:14:29,458
You can have a ball pit.
290
00:14:29,458 --> 00:14:31,166
Oh my God, Dad. That's for kids!
291
00:14:31,166 --> 00:14:33,375
I've had my period for seven months now!
292
00:14:33,375 --> 00:14:35,083
Wait, Stacy.
293
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:36,916
That's a long period, sweetheart!
294
00:14:38,833 --> 00:14:40,375
You know what? I'm gonna head out.
295
00:14:40,375 --> 00:14:41,500
I'll drive you.
296
00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:43,166
Love you. See you in the morning.
297
00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:44,958
Don't worry, Dad. It'll be okay.
298
00:14:45,458 --> 00:14:47,500
She's growing up so fast. It's crazy.
299
00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:48,791
I'm drinking now.
300
00:14:48,791 --> 00:14:51,625
I tried it the other day.
I didn't like it. We're good.
301
00:14:54,916 --> 00:14:57,333
Va-y'chal Mosh--
302
00:14:57,333 --> 00:14:59,958
- Va-y'chal...
303
00:14:59,958 --> 00:15:01,500
Dear God, what's up?
304
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:04,416
Stacy Friedman here,
but I guess you already know that.
305
00:15:04,916 --> 00:15:07,416
And I guess you already know
what I'm going to say.
306
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,375
But just to be super safe,
I'm going to say it anyway.
307
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:15,958
I would really, really appreciate it
if I could have an amazing Bat Mitzvah.
308
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,666
And I know I need
to do my mitzvah project.
309
00:15:19,666 --> 00:15:24,166
But isn't a mitzvah project supposed to be
giving back in a way that represents me?
310
00:15:24,166 --> 00:15:26,125
Which is why I don't know what to do.
311
00:15:26,833 --> 00:15:28,208
I mean, I'm not popular.
312
00:15:28,208 --> 00:15:29,750
I'm not a loser.
313
00:15:31,333 --> 00:15:33,291
I don't know who I am.
314
00:15:34,250 --> 00:15:37,291
But I do know,
if I have a kick-ass Bat Mitzvah,
315
00:15:37,291 --> 00:15:41,291
doors would open,
and I can have a fab life on my own terms.
316
00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:43,125
No. No famous pop stars.
317
00:15:43,125 --> 00:15:44,458
You can have a ball pit.
318
00:15:44,458 --> 00:15:47,416
A ball pit? Lydia's
gonna get everything she asked for.
319
00:15:47,416 --> 00:15:49,416
Even a Twizzlers station for me.
320
00:15:49,958 --> 00:15:52,125
I'm starting
to worry Mom and Dad don't get it,
321
00:15:52,125 --> 00:15:54,166
and the whole thing's gonna suck.
322
00:16:00,791 --> 00:16:04,125
- You had her phone the whole time?
- No, she was lying.
323
00:16:04,125 --> 00:16:05,625
- The audacity.
- The monster.
324
00:16:05,625 --> 00:16:06,875
Yeah.
325
00:16:06,875 --> 00:16:08,791
- Can we sit outside? It's a nice day.
- No.
326
00:16:08,791 --> 00:16:10,541
I mean, I definitely could use some color.
327
00:16:10,541 --> 00:16:13,041
- Yeah, it's true.
- Is that Tory Burch?
328
00:16:13,041 --> 00:16:17,250
Oh no, it's Walmart. I got this
and a water bottle for only $12.
329
00:16:17,250 --> 00:16:18,583
I was talking to her.
330
00:16:21,291 --> 00:16:22,625
M-me?
331
00:16:22,625 --> 00:16:23,750
Your skirt.
332
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:26,083
Uh, yeah, it is Tory Burch.
333
00:16:26,083 --> 00:16:29,750
My mom is trying to spend all
my dad's money before the next court date.
334
00:16:30,833 --> 00:16:33,458
I'm pretty sure I saw Hailey Bieber
wearing the exact same one.
335
00:16:33,458 --> 00:16:36,000
Oh cool. Okay. Bye.
336
00:16:38,625 --> 00:16:39,791
That was weird.
337
00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:42,791
- I love and hate them at the same time.
- Yeah.
338
00:16:42,791 --> 00:16:44,333
What just happened?
339
00:16:53,958 --> 00:16:55,458
♪ Wait a minute ♪
340
00:16:55,958 --> 00:17:00,291
♪ I think I left my conscience
On your front-door step ♪
341
00:17:01,833 --> 00:17:03,500
♪ Whoa ♪
342
00:17:05,958 --> 00:17:09,250
So get this. I heard Megan's
doing her mitzvah project next weekend.
343
00:17:09,250 --> 00:17:10,916
She's passing out sunscreen at Coachella.
344
00:17:10,916 --> 00:17:12,875
- What? Wow.
- So cool.
345
00:17:12,875 --> 00:17:14,750
Guys, I have to come up
with something amazing.
346
00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:16,083
This is so much pressure.
347
00:17:16,083 --> 00:17:19,583
How long do you think it takes to become
a social activist influencer on TikTok?
348
00:17:19,583 --> 00:17:21,083
Uh, six months?
349
00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:22,458
Too long.
350
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,416
You know what?
We just need to chill our brains.
351
00:17:25,416 --> 00:17:27,916
What are you doing Saturday?
My mom's out of town this weekend.
352
00:17:27,916 --> 00:17:29,250
Why? You gonna throw a party?
353
00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:30,291
A dork party?
354
00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:33,458
What if I did?
355
00:17:33,958 --> 00:17:36,125
Well, I mean, my dad's out of town.
356
00:17:36,125 --> 00:17:38,166
Now, you could actually throw a party.
357
00:17:38,166 --> 00:17:41,166
You could invite the whole seventh grade
and not exclude anybody.
358
00:17:41,166 --> 00:17:45,500
Oh, come on. Wouldn't it be fun to exclude
people instead of being excluded for once?
359
00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:00,416
Heads up!
360
00:18:01,875 --> 00:18:03,375
Ay dios mío.
361
00:18:03,875 --> 00:18:06,166
Stace, Stace, Stace, Stace? Are you okay?
362
00:18:06,166 --> 00:18:07,958
- Oh shit.
363
00:18:07,958 --> 00:18:09,416
That doesn't look good.
364
00:18:09,416 --> 00:18:10,791
You have grass in your hair.
365
00:18:10,791 --> 00:18:12,041
Stacy.
366
00:18:12,041 --> 00:18:13,291
Are you okay?
367
00:18:13,291 --> 00:18:14,625
That's my bad!
368
00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:17,791
You good?
369
00:18:22,416 --> 00:18:23,583
Yeah. Sorry about that.
370
00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:30,458
- Have some water.
371
00:18:32,541 --> 00:18:33,916
Oh my God. That was perfect.
372
00:18:33,916 --> 00:18:35,250
He went... And then you went.
373
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:37,583
- You guys are meant to be.
374
00:18:37,583 --> 00:18:39,500
Hey, are your legs okay, Nikki?
375
00:18:40,750 --> 00:18:42,458
They're fine, Mateo. Just relax.
376
00:18:52,500 --> 00:18:53,333
Really?
377
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:57,125
Oh, by the way, Dad invited
the dry cleaner to the Bat Mitzvah, Stacy.
378
00:18:57,125 --> 00:18:58,833
What? No, that's so unfair.
379
00:18:58,833 --> 00:19:02,333
The ratio to old people to normal people
is already so unbalanced.
380
00:19:02,333 --> 00:19:04,916
Why is that kid Mateo going
to Hebrew school?
381
00:19:05,833 --> 00:19:09,208
Maybe he wanted to convert
and take some Jewish holidays off?
382
00:19:10,625 --> 00:19:12,125
You gonna invite him, Stace?
383
00:19:12,125 --> 00:19:13,666
Mateo? No, I barely know him.
384
00:19:13,666 --> 00:19:16,041
You know, if you invite Mateo,
Andy might come.
385
00:19:20,875 --> 00:19:22,500
Have fun learning!
386
00:19:22,500 --> 00:19:24,208
Love you!
387
00:19:26,291 --> 00:19:27,625
Oh shit!
388
00:19:30,041 --> 00:19:31,250
Are you on dru--
389
00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:33,333
Take me to your best friend's house
390
00:19:33,333 --> 00:19:37,666
Goin' round this roundabout, oh yeah
391
00:19:39,208 --> 00:19:41,291
- Thank you.
- Good job, guys.
392
00:19:41,875 --> 00:19:43,000
- Manishmah.
- Hi.
393
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,583
- Shalom, you two.
- Shalom.
394
00:19:44,583 --> 00:19:47,416
Oh, this looks really good.
I am not that creative...
395
00:19:47,416 --> 00:19:49,458
I was not good at arts and crafts,
like, at all.
396
00:19:49,458 --> 00:19:51,250
- I like your outfit, Ashley.
- Thank you.
397
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:52,541
Oh yeah, it's really cute.
398
00:19:52,541 --> 00:19:54,750
Look who's coming out
of the make out closet.
399
00:19:54,750 --> 00:19:56,375
Oh my God,
were they hooking up in there?
400
00:19:56,375 --> 00:19:59,583
How do they not get caught?
There's literally so many people around.
401
00:20:00,416 --> 00:20:05,083
Would you believe when I was your age,
I was in a Jewish rock and roll band?
402
00:20:05,083 --> 00:20:10,041
We called ourselves Exodus
because Genesis was already taken.
403
00:20:10,875 --> 00:20:12,250
I'm sorry, Aaron, am I boring you?
404
00:20:12,250 --> 00:20:14,666
What? No--
I was listening, Cantor Jerry.
405
00:20:14,666 --> 00:20:15,791
Stace, Lyd!
406
00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:19,208
- You look so cute. You guys good?
- Yes.
407
00:20:19,208 --> 00:20:20,958
- The pole!
- Pole!
408
00:20:21,750 --> 00:20:23,500
Oh, wait, how's your Torah portion going?
409
00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:25,291
It's like 6,000 pages long.
410
00:20:25,291 --> 00:20:27,958
Why did my parents pick
the third week of August?
411
00:20:27,958 --> 00:20:31,666
But mine's literally, like, a minute
and a half long. Thank you, June 10th!
412
00:20:32,291 --> 00:20:35,000
Chop-chop, ladies! Curtain's up in five!
413
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:38,916
I like to think of Hebrew school
as a little performance I give.
414
00:20:38,916 --> 00:20:42,666
Your prayer book is the playbill,
and I'm the star, cutie-pops.
415
00:20:43,583 --> 00:20:46,708
Giving you a bit of the ole razzle-dazzle.
You know what I'm saying?
416
00:20:46,708 --> 00:20:48,625
Kidding. Come one, class is starting.
Let's go!
417
00:20:48,625 --> 00:20:49,791
Rabbi Rebecca!
418
00:20:49,791 --> 00:20:52,083
- Can we please have snacks?
- You want some latkes and gefilte fish?
419
00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:53,083
She's insane.
420
00:20:53,083 --> 00:20:54,541
I know. I love her.
421
00:20:54,541 --> 00:20:56,875
"And I'm the star,
cutie-pops, razzle-dazzle."
422
00:20:56,875 --> 00:20:58,291
- Very nice.
- Very good.
423
00:20:58,291 --> 00:20:59,708
Thank you. Thank you very much.
424
00:21:00,833 --> 00:21:03,125
- Is she serious? Oh my God.
- I know, right?
425
00:21:03,125 --> 00:21:05,958
I really want a cloud.
Like, I want to taste a cloud.
426
00:21:05,958 --> 00:21:08,333
- You want what?
- I want to taste a cloud.
427
00:21:08,333 --> 00:21:09,833
I want to taste a cloud. That's all.
428
00:21:09,833 --> 00:21:11,791
- It seems--
- Yo. You good, bro?
429
00:21:15,333 --> 00:21:16,875
Yeah. Why?
430
00:21:16,875 --> 00:21:19,041
Uh, your head from earlier.
431
00:21:19,041 --> 00:21:20,416
Head injuries are no joke.
432
00:21:20,416 --> 00:21:23,166
One time I barfed at soccer
from a concussion.
433
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,333
Did you barf?
434
00:21:25,958 --> 00:21:27,791
No. I didn't.
435
00:21:28,291 --> 00:21:29,208
Tight.
436
00:21:33,750 --> 00:21:36,375
- All right, shabbat shalom!
- Shabbat shalom.
437
00:21:36,375 --> 00:21:39,666
How's everyone feeling?
We having the time of our lives right now?
438
00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:41,666
You guys start your mitzvah projects yet?
439
00:21:41,666 --> 00:21:43,541
- No.
- Yeah.
440
00:21:43,541 --> 00:21:47,625
No? It's the most important part
of this whole thing.
441
00:21:47,625 --> 00:21:52,958
It's when you do something menschie
for your community, for society at-large.
442
00:21:52,958 --> 00:21:56,041
What? You guys don't care
about society at-large?
443
00:21:56,041 --> 00:21:57,916
- No.
- Yeah.
444
00:21:57,916 --> 00:22:02,583
All right, how about we pick up where
we left off with our old buddy, David.
445
00:22:02,583 --> 00:22:03,708
Remember him?
446
00:22:03,708 --> 00:22:08,541
Homeboy was about to get his groove on
with the foxy Bathsheba
447
00:22:08,541 --> 00:22:10,958
even though she was married
to someone else.
448
00:22:10,958 --> 00:22:13,500
What a snake David is!
449
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:14,666
You a snake, Aaron?
450
00:22:16,041 --> 00:22:16,958
N-no.
451
00:22:16,958 --> 00:22:19,166
You ever pull something like that?
Cheat on your wife?
452
00:22:21,541 --> 00:22:25,625
- M-me?
- Dude, I'm messing around with you. Relax!
453
00:22:25,625 --> 00:22:27,833
You're sweating, my goodness.
454
00:22:27,833 --> 00:22:29,833
You're not a snake, Aaron. You're awesome.
455
00:22:29,833 --> 00:22:31,916
Look at that arm hair
and mustache coming in strong.
456
00:22:31,916 --> 00:22:33,916
Baruch HaShem, Aaron. Let's go.
457
00:22:40,333 --> 00:22:42,666
So I told the sales lady,
"I'll take one in each color."
458
00:22:42,666 --> 00:22:45,625
And she said, "Are you getting a divorce?"
And I said, "How'd you guess?"
459
00:22:48,208 --> 00:22:49,375
That's really funny, Mom.
460
00:22:49,375 --> 00:22:52,666
Hey, can you let me bring over some people
on Saturday?
461
00:22:52,666 --> 00:22:53,875
Oh sure. Like a playdate?
462
00:22:53,875 --> 00:22:57,833
A playdate? Mom, I'm 13.
Please don't call it a playdate.
463
00:22:58,750 --> 00:23:00,875
My dad's calling me. Hi!
464
00:23:00,875 --> 00:23:03,375
Hey! Stacels.
Hey, I'm at the store right now.
465
00:23:03,375 --> 00:23:05,750
Mommy told me you need some, uh, tampons...
466
00:23:05,750 --> 00:23:08,083
- But I'm not sure what size you use--
- Stop. Get whatever.
467
00:23:08,083 --> 00:23:09,958
There's a lot of whatever
to choose from.
468
00:23:09,958 --> 00:23:11,333
Do pads. I don't care.
469
00:23:11,333 --> 00:23:12,875
What kind of flow do you got going?
470
00:23:12,875 --> 00:23:14,666
- Uh, heavy flow situation?
- Heavy.
471
00:23:14,666 --> 00:23:16,708
- Oh my God.
- A light flow? Or extra chunky?
472
00:23:16,708 --> 00:23:19,500
I... I... I got confused.
I'm getting peanut butter also.
473
00:23:19,500 --> 00:23:22,666
- I mean--
- Mommy said it was a high-alert situation?
474
00:23:22,666 --> 00:23:24,458
That you might have to sleep
in the bathtub?
475
00:23:24,458 --> 00:23:26,291
I'll drop 'em off
in your room immediately.
476
00:23:26,291 --> 00:23:27,791
Oh my God. Love you. Bye.
477
00:23:31,583 --> 00:23:34,541
"Hey, Lyd, it's Kym.
Having people over now."
478
00:23:34,541 --> 00:23:36,000
"Pull up if you're free."
479
00:23:36,500 --> 00:23:37,333
Wow.
480
00:23:39,250 --> 00:23:40,916
Um, what do I say?
481
00:23:40,916 --> 00:23:42,250
Do you want to go?
482
00:23:44,125 --> 00:23:45,000
No.
483
00:23:46,750 --> 00:23:49,416
But, I mean, I should respond.
484
00:23:49,416 --> 00:23:52,500
Yeah. For sure.
Uh, if you want to go, I don't care.
485
00:23:52,500 --> 00:23:55,416
I just think they're awful,
but it's your choice.
486
00:23:56,583 --> 00:23:58,750
- Let me ask if you can come.
- No. Please don't do that.
487
00:23:58,750 --> 00:24:02,291
Yeah, I'm gonna ask. Doing it right now.
Look, I just did it. Whoops. Sorry.
488
00:24:09,125 --> 00:24:13,083
Oh my God! Okay, Mom, can you drop us off
at Kym Chang-Cohen's house, please?
489
00:24:13,083 --> 00:24:15,708
- Wait. Can you stop by my place first?
- Sure.
490
00:24:15,708 --> 00:24:18,666
- Period.
- You gonna ask if Tara and Nikki can come?
491
00:24:18,666 --> 00:24:19,750
Oh.
492
00:24:20,250 --> 00:24:23,458
Oh. Um, I mean, I don't think so.
493
00:24:23,458 --> 00:24:25,375
Bringing three people
would be, like, a lot.
494
00:24:25,375 --> 00:24:26,833
- Yeah, I agree.
- Yeah.
495
00:24:29,791 --> 00:24:32,583
- You can't go now.
496
00:24:36,833 --> 00:24:38,500
Okay. Hurry.
497
00:24:38,500 --> 00:24:39,708
- Hi, Ron.
- Hi.
498
00:24:39,708 --> 00:24:42,166
- Should I wear a jacket with this?
- No. Where are you going?
499
00:24:42,166 --> 00:24:43,583
Kym Chang-Cohen's.
500
00:24:43,583 --> 00:24:46,708
Oh wow. First rule of going
to a cool kid's house, don't disagree.
501
00:24:46,708 --> 00:24:47,666
Don't get too excited.
502
00:24:47,666 --> 00:24:48,750
- Got it. Thanks.
- Cool.
503
00:24:48,750 --> 00:24:50,375
Oh, Dad left pads on your bed.
504
00:24:50,375 --> 00:24:52,875
They're enormous.
I almost thought they were pillows.
505
00:24:52,875 --> 00:24:53,875
Are you joking?
506
00:24:53,875 --> 00:24:55,750
That's funny.
507
00:25:02,791 --> 00:25:04,291
Oh my God.
508
00:25:04,291 --> 00:25:06,750
Remember.
Don't disagree. Don't get too excited.
509
00:25:17,250 --> 00:25:19,416
So, Lydia, any crushes?
510
00:25:20,708 --> 00:25:22,291
Oh, uh...
511
00:25:23,041 --> 00:25:26,583
No, not really. There's not a lot
of options for boys in our grade.
512
00:25:26,583 --> 00:25:28,375
- You know?
513
00:25:29,416 --> 00:25:31,333
Oh, so you only like boys?
514
00:25:31,333 --> 00:25:33,541
Uh, I think so.
515
00:25:33,541 --> 00:25:35,458
Don't worry. Some of us are straight too.
516
00:25:35,458 --> 00:25:36,541
Cool.
517
00:25:37,333 --> 00:25:38,666
I don't disagree.
518
00:25:43,166 --> 00:25:44,666
Yeah, Stacy, what about you?
519
00:25:45,333 --> 00:25:46,291
Who do you like?
520
00:25:47,625 --> 00:25:49,750
Uh, no one, really.
521
00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:57,500
Uh, people are coming to my house tomorrow
if you want to come. Nothing big.
522
00:25:57,500 --> 00:25:58,625
Sounds chill.
523
00:25:59,208 --> 00:26:01,291
You guys have to come.
It'll be freaking amazing!
524
00:26:01,291 --> 00:26:02,750
Her house is so cool.
525
00:26:06,250 --> 00:26:07,791
I mean, it'll be a'ight.
526
00:26:07,791 --> 00:26:11,708
Uh, anyways, we should
probably wash this off before we go.
527
00:26:11,708 --> 00:26:14,708
- Uh, we have to change before we leave.
- Where are we going?
528
00:26:14,708 --> 00:26:16,208
To the ledge.
529
00:26:22,416 --> 00:26:24,250
- No way.
- We'll be careful.
530
00:26:24,250 --> 00:26:25,458
I don't want to die.
531
00:26:25,458 --> 00:26:27,250
- We have to. We can't disagree.
- What?
532
00:26:27,250 --> 00:26:28,333
Don't act excited!
533
00:26:28,333 --> 00:26:29,833
Andy will be there.
534
00:26:33,916 --> 00:26:35,666
Come on, Lydia, can't you do this for me?
535
00:26:35,666 --> 00:26:37,833
I already got you invited here.
Isn't that enough?
536
00:26:40,416 --> 00:26:41,791
I didn't mean it like that.
537
00:26:41,791 --> 00:26:43,333
You guys coming or what?
538
00:26:43,333 --> 00:26:44,583
Yeah, I'm down.
539
00:26:58,250 --> 00:27:00,000
♪ It's irresistible ♪
540
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,375
♪ I'm so stuck on you ♪
541
00:27:03,291 --> 00:27:06,375
Ugh, my mom said I have to wait a year
before I can get lip filler.
542
00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:08,750
She said you can have Botox.
Just use that on your lips.
543
00:27:08,750 --> 00:27:09,666
Yeah.
544
00:27:11,375 --> 00:27:13,375
♪ I might be a little obsessed ♪
545
00:27:18,583 --> 00:27:20,000
Look who's here!
546
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,791
♪ I might be a little obsessed ♪
547
00:27:25,500 --> 00:27:28,291
♪ What's a feeling
Without someone to feel it? ♪
548
00:27:28,291 --> 00:27:31,250
♪ What's appealing?
Sleep in on the weekend ♪
549
00:27:31,250 --> 00:27:33,958
♪ Home solo, spinning on the ceiling ♪
550
00:27:34,666 --> 00:27:36,208
♪ And every day is the same ♪
551
00:27:36,208 --> 00:27:38,958
♪ When the name of the game's
Break sweat to break even ♪
552
00:27:39,958 --> 00:27:41,333
What up, what up?
553
00:27:43,458 --> 00:27:44,458
What's good?
554
00:27:45,750 --> 00:27:46,583
Hi, Stacy.
555
00:27:47,375 --> 00:27:48,208
Hey, Mateo.
556
00:27:48,208 --> 00:27:51,541
Yo, we just had soccer,
and we kicked St. Catherine's ass, 3-0.
557
00:27:51,541 --> 00:27:52,958
Even though their field sucks.
558
00:27:52,958 --> 00:27:55,291
Yeah, that field is so lopsided.
559
00:27:57,041 --> 00:27:58,000
Exactly.
560
00:27:58,791 --> 00:27:59,625
Uh,
561
00:28:00,250 --> 00:28:01,250
how's your head?
562
00:28:06,208 --> 00:28:08,875
It's, um... it's still on her body, so...
563
00:28:09,458 --> 00:28:10,625
Yeah, we love that.
564
00:28:10,625 --> 00:28:13,166
And I'm not barfing, so, yeah.
565
00:28:15,833 --> 00:28:17,916
Uh, anyways...
566
00:28:18,833 --> 00:28:20,250
What's up? I'm Andy.
567
00:28:20,250 --> 00:28:23,291
Uh, I know. We, uh...
we go to Hebrew school together. Lydia.
568
00:28:23,291 --> 00:28:24,583
We do?
569
00:28:24,583 --> 00:28:25,875
Yeah.
570
00:28:27,333 --> 00:28:29,500
I dare one of you guys to jump in!
571
00:28:29,500 --> 00:28:30,958
Come on! Let's go.
572
00:28:30,958 --> 00:28:32,250
Jump off the ledge, Aaron?
573
00:28:32,250 --> 00:28:34,916
You'd break both legs on impact
and your spine.
574
00:28:34,916 --> 00:28:36,833
Yeah, I heard
Melissa Quinto's cousin jumped,
575
00:28:36,833 --> 00:28:39,291
and she now has to text
with her nose, so, no.
576
00:28:39,291 --> 00:28:41,166
Looks like it might be fun.
577
00:28:42,708 --> 00:28:44,625
Hey, I'd jump
if I didn't have my contacts in.
578
00:28:44,625 --> 00:28:47,125
Oh, I'd be happy
to hold them for you, Aaron.
579
00:28:50,666 --> 00:28:53,708
Oh shit. You can't see.
580
00:28:56,416 --> 00:28:57,250
I'll do it.
581
00:28:58,583 --> 00:28:59,416
What?
582
00:29:00,541 --> 00:29:01,625
You'd jump in?
583
00:29:01,625 --> 00:29:03,916
That... that's sick.
584
00:29:03,916 --> 00:29:05,083
Let's see it.
585
00:29:07,416 --> 00:29:08,333
Okay.
586
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,791
- No way, no way.
- Oh shit.
587
00:29:10,791 --> 00:29:12,708
If she jumps, it's my idea, guys.
588
00:29:12,708 --> 00:29:14,750
We don't know if that's shallow.
589
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,375
- She's not gonna do it.
- She's not gonna do it.
590
00:29:34,375 --> 00:29:36,708
- If she dies, we weren't here.
- Hell no.
591
00:29:36,708 --> 00:29:39,000
- She's a scaredy-cat.
- She's stalling.
592
00:29:39,541 --> 00:29:42,791
Stacy, you said we'd be careful. Please.
593
00:29:43,291 --> 00:29:44,208
Is Andy watching?
594
00:29:47,500 --> 00:29:49,125
Everyone is watching!
595
00:29:50,541 --> 00:29:53,666
Friedman! Yo, you got this! Let's go!
596
00:29:54,583 --> 00:29:56,625
- Let's get it!
- Stacy, do not do this to me.
597
00:29:56,625 --> 00:30:00,250
If you die, your parents will kill me.
I swear to God. Stacy! No!
598
00:30:09,625 --> 00:30:12,125
- Oh my God!
- Holy shit!
599
00:30:12,125 --> 00:30:13,791
- My God!
- Oh my God!
600
00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:19,208
Stacy!
601
00:30:19,875 --> 00:30:21,166
- Stacy!
- Oh shit!
602
00:30:22,041 --> 00:30:23,708
That was unreal!
603
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:27,958
- Stacy!
- Woohoo!
604
00:30:29,041 --> 00:30:30,666
- That was my idea!
- Yo, shut up!
605
00:30:30,666 --> 00:30:33,250
Yo, Stacy Friedman!
606
00:30:33,250 --> 00:30:35,541
You're a fricken' legend!
607
00:30:35,541 --> 00:30:37,500
That's how I do it!
608
00:30:40,125 --> 00:30:41,833
What is that?
609
00:30:47,708 --> 00:30:50,041
Oh, disgusting.
610
00:30:50,041 --> 00:30:53,583
Yo, Stacy just turned the ledge
into the Red Sea.
611
00:30:58,833 --> 00:30:59,791
Chill out.
612
00:30:59,791 --> 00:31:01,833
It's just a period, guys.
It happens every month.
613
00:31:01,833 --> 00:31:03,291
That looks like two months.
614
00:31:03,291 --> 00:31:05,333
You couldn't deal
with having a period, Aaron.
615
00:31:05,333 --> 00:31:06,416
Yeah, you punk.
616
00:31:06,416 --> 00:31:07,958
Wait, what'd I even do?
617
00:31:20,500 --> 00:31:22,208
Thanks for laughing with everyone.
618
00:31:23,375 --> 00:31:24,708
I wasn't laughing.
619
00:31:24,708 --> 00:31:26,083
Yes, you were.
620
00:31:26,083 --> 00:31:28,916
Stacy, it's not that big of a deal.
Just take my sweatshirt.
621
00:31:28,916 --> 00:31:31,833
Not a big deal? That was humiliating!
Andy looked at me like--
622
00:31:31,833 --> 00:31:34,208
You're a badass!
That's all anyone was thinking.
623
00:31:34,208 --> 00:31:36,625
No, whatever. I'm over him.
624
00:31:38,458 --> 00:31:39,625
Call it.
625
00:31:39,625 --> 00:31:42,250
- Stacy, think this through.
- I did. Call it.
626
00:31:46,083 --> 00:31:47,166
5:23.
627
00:31:47,166 --> 00:31:50,750
Stacy Friedman's crush
on Andy Goldfarb has ended.
628
00:31:50,750 --> 00:31:54,041
Time of death, 5:23 p.m.
629
00:31:54,041 --> 00:31:55,791
Okay, let's just go.
630
00:31:55,791 --> 00:31:57,750
No, you just stay with your new friends.
631
00:31:57,750 --> 00:31:59,375
What? What are you talking about?
632
00:31:59,375 --> 00:32:01,708
Oh my God, stop! You didn't have my back.
Just admit it!
633
00:32:01,708 --> 00:32:04,333
You stop. I told you not to jump.
I didn't even want to be here.
634
00:32:04,333 --> 00:32:06,708
Only because you already got them
to come to your party!
635
00:32:06,708 --> 00:32:10,125
- You're being so dramatic right now!
- You're such a wannabe right now!
636
00:32:11,750 --> 00:32:13,333
I'm freezing. I'm gonna go.
637
00:32:13,333 --> 00:32:16,083
Wow, Stacy. I can't even.
638
00:32:16,083 --> 00:32:17,583
I can't even, even more.
639
00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:22,708
What you gonna do, sweets?
640
00:32:22,708 --> 00:32:24,416
Sending out the invitations today.
641
00:32:24,416 --> 00:32:27,125
I have to get my hair dyed--
Oh, will you call DJ Schmuley?
642
00:32:27,125 --> 00:32:29,875
He's asking for a green room and per diem.
643
00:32:29,875 --> 00:32:31,791
And he may or may not have hit on me.
644
00:32:31,791 --> 00:32:33,708
Well, I may or may not punch him
in the face.
645
00:32:33,708 --> 00:32:35,708
- Yeah, okay.
- Let me handle Schmuley.
646
00:32:35,708 --> 00:32:37,916
So, you, I'm going to the movies.
You want to come?
647
00:32:38,625 --> 00:32:41,166
Too weird being
at a movie theater alone with my dad.
648
00:32:41,166 --> 00:32:44,125
Okay, you never want to be with me again?
What are you gonna do all day?
649
00:32:44,125 --> 00:32:48,041
Zaara's coming over, and we're going to
online shop and then take a nap outside.
650
00:32:48,791 --> 00:32:50,000
And that's not weird to you?
651
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:52,500
We're tired from frickin' school all week!
652
00:32:53,666 --> 00:32:57,375
Honey, go have quality time with
your younger daughter who still loves you.
653
00:32:57,375 --> 00:32:58,833
- Yeah.
- Okay? Have a good day.
654
00:32:58,833 --> 00:33:00,791
This one scares me.
655
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,416
- Miss you already, Daddy!
- Do ya? Great.
656
00:33:15,583 --> 00:33:17,541
Oh my God!
657
00:33:37,666 --> 00:33:40,250
- We ready in there, buddy?
- One second, Dad!
658
00:33:57,333 --> 00:33:59,875
Don't do this to me. Let's go!
659
00:33:59,875 --> 00:34:01,041
Coming!
660
00:34:04,625 --> 00:34:05,708
Bubie, I'm psyched.
661
00:34:05,708 --> 00:34:08,666
I'm psyched about the popcorn.
Lots of butter.
662
00:34:09,458 --> 00:34:11,416
Lots of anger after I finish it.
663
00:34:11,416 --> 00:34:14,583
- Lots of oil on my face.
- Dad, can I skip the movies?
664
00:34:14,583 --> 00:34:17,666
You wanna skip the movie? How come?
You don't want to be seen with me either?
665
00:34:17,666 --> 00:34:21,041
No, no, no. I just need to talk to Lydia.
Can you drop me at her house?
666
00:34:22,041 --> 00:34:23,125
Sure, buddy.
667
00:34:24,250 --> 00:34:26,333
What's the matter? Something bugging you?
668
00:34:27,375 --> 00:34:29,166
It'll be fine. Whatever it is.
669
00:34:31,458 --> 00:34:33,791
Here. Don't tell your mother.
Have some coffee.
670
00:34:34,375 --> 00:34:36,416
One sip... [yelling] I gotcha.
671
00:34:36,416 --> 00:34:37,666
- Gotcha.
672
00:34:40,583 --> 00:34:44,666
- All right. Have fun. I love you.
- Thank you. Love you.
673
00:34:44,666 --> 00:34:46,666
I'll just be all alone
at the movies,
674
00:34:46,666 --> 00:34:49,083
crying and eating a bucket
of Sour Patch Kids!
675
00:34:49,083 --> 00:34:52,041
- A'ight!
- Okay. Text me if you need me.
676
00:34:52,041 --> 00:34:53,166
I will!
677
00:35:08,625 --> 00:35:10,041
♪ Feeling like I'm falling ♪
678
00:35:10,041 --> 00:35:13,000
♪ I've been getting uptight
Staring at the ceiling ♪
679
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:16,875
♪ Trying to get it just right
You know what's on mind ♪
680
00:35:16,875 --> 00:35:20,041
♪ I can't look you in the eye ♪
681
00:35:20,041 --> 00:35:23,083
♪ I'm getting on the freeway
Underneath the night sky ♪
682
00:35:23,083 --> 00:35:25,916
♪ I'm a little wallflower
Singing "One Headlight" ♪
683
00:35:25,916 --> 00:35:28,375
♪ Looking for a sign ♪
684
00:35:28,375 --> 00:35:31,166
♪ Superstition made me blind ♪
685
00:35:31,166 --> 00:35:33,750
♪ I'm sick of running from a past life ♪
686
00:35:34,333 --> 00:35:36,500
♪ I don't care about the next one ♪
687
00:35:37,083 --> 00:35:39,541
♪ Right now I'm feeling like a stranger ♪
688
00:35:40,291 --> 00:35:41,916
♪ Don't recognize the voice inside my... ♪
689
00:35:41,916 --> 00:35:45,625
- Oh. Uh, Stacy, you would know.
- Uh, how do you turn on the jacuzzi jets?
690
00:35:46,208 --> 00:35:48,000
Uh, the switch is in the pantry.
691
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,000
- The pantry?
- Pantry?
692
00:35:54,208 --> 00:35:56,666
♪ Don't recognize the voice
Inside my head ♪
693
00:35:56,666 --> 00:35:59,083
♪ 'Cause I've been running
From a past life ♪
694
00:35:59,583 --> 00:36:02,875
♪ I wanna live
I wanna live this life instead ♪
695
00:36:07,125 --> 00:36:08,583
Oh my God.
696
00:36:13,208 --> 00:36:14,416
Oh my God.
697
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:23,500
- Stacy! Stacy!
- Oh, snap.
698
00:36:23,500 --> 00:36:26,041
Yo, shit just got real.
699
00:36:26,958 --> 00:36:27,791
Stacy.
700
00:36:28,291 --> 00:36:29,791
Stacy, he kissed me!
701
00:36:29,791 --> 00:36:31,375
You don't even like him!
702
00:36:32,375 --> 00:36:34,416
You're like David and Bathsheba,
and you're the snake.
703
00:36:34,416 --> 00:36:36,416
- I'm sorry, okay. I--
- Stop talking!
704
00:36:36,416 --> 00:36:38,333
Let me explain? Please?
I haven't done anything.
705
00:36:38,333 --> 00:36:40,500
No! Let me explain some things to you.
706
00:36:40,500 --> 00:36:42,875
First of all, we are no longer friends.
707
00:36:42,875 --> 00:36:47,208
Second of all, I am definitely not doing
your entrance video.
708
00:36:47,833 --> 00:36:50,666
- Stacy.
- Oh! And one more thing...
709
00:36:52,166 --> 00:36:56,708
Lydia Rodriguez Katz,
you are so not invited to my Bat Mitzvah.
710
00:36:58,875 --> 00:37:01,250
Good! Have fun without me!
711
00:37:09,041 --> 00:37:11,708
Dear God, Stacy Friedman here.
712
00:37:12,208 --> 00:37:15,458
And what the hell?
713
00:37:16,375 --> 00:37:17,958
How could you do this to me?
714
00:37:26,750 --> 00:37:30,791
♪ Brown guilty eyes
And little white lies ♪
715
00:37:30,791 --> 00:37:34,666
♪ Yeah, I played dumb but I always knew ♪
716
00:37:36,208 --> 00:37:40,500
♪ That you talked to her
Maybe did even worse ♪
717
00:37:40,500 --> 00:37:43,041
♪ I kept quiet so I could keep you ♪
718
00:37:45,208 --> 00:37:48,000
♪ You betrayed me ♪
719
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:54,166
♪ And I know that you'll never feel sorry
For the way I hurt, yeah ♪
720
00:37:54,166 --> 00:37:55,375
Okay, bye, Stacy.
721
00:37:57,166 --> 00:37:59,666
Oh, oh, Z. It's okay. Go back to bed.
722
00:37:59,666 --> 00:38:02,375
- You're fine. I promise. You're fine.
723
00:38:02,875 --> 00:38:04,875
- ♪ But that didn't matter ♪
724
00:38:04,875 --> 00:38:09,666
♪ It took you two weeks
To go off and date her ♪
725
00:38:09,666 --> 00:38:12,833
♪ Guess you didn't cheat
But you're still a traitor ♪
726
00:38:12,833 --> 00:38:15,291
Stacy, wait up. Stace, wait up.
727
00:38:15,291 --> 00:38:17,083
Are you okay? What happened?
728
00:38:17,083 --> 00:38:19,791
Yeah. Everybody keeps asking us
if you need a double-X tampon.
729
00:38:19,791 --> 00:38:21,958
- I'm fine.
- Are you sure, Stace?
730
00:38:21,958 --> 00:38:24,583
'Cause your best friend's
dating your crush.
731
00:38:24,583 --> 00:38:26,583
They're not dating. It was just one kiss.
732
00:38:26,583 --> 00:38:28,791
Oh, I heard he touched her underboob
in PE this morning.
733
00:38:28,791 --> 00:38:30,541
- Tara...
- It's fine, guys.
734
00:38:30,541 --> 00:38:32,583
Junior high gossip. Never ends.
735
00:38:55,833 --> 00:38:57,791
- Okay, well, when did that start?
736
00:38:58,416 --> 00:38:59,916
Her party this weekend.
737
00:39:00,500 --> 00:39:01,750
She had the party?
738
00:39:01,750 --> 00:39:03,583
Guess so. She didn't invite us.
739
00:39:03,583 --> 00:39:06,083
No surprise, because they were
awfully chummy laughing
740
00:39:06,083 --> 00:39:08,416
at my near-death experience at the ledge.
741
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:11,000
You guys went to the ledge with Andy?
742
00:39:12,958 --> 00:39:15,208
Oh, it's just the ledge.
It was last minute.
743
00:39:15,708 --> 00:39:16,666
Hmm.
744
00:39:17,916 --> 00:39:19,750
- Come on, Tara. Let's go.
- Yeah.
745
00:39:22,583 --> 00:39:25,416
Okay, today we're going
to be talking about tikkun olam.
746
00:39:25,416 --> 00:39:26,791
Does anyone know what that means?
747
00:39:27,458 --> 00:39:28,375
Kym!
748
00:39:28,375 --> 00:39:30,958
If God exists,
then how do you explain climate change?
749
00:39:33,333 --> 00:39:35,791
It's actually an amazing question. Um--
750
00:39:35,791 --> 00:39:38,750
Yeah, and why can't straight people
get on gay TikTok? It's way funnier.
751
00:39:38,750 --> 00:39:42,125
And if God loves me, then why
is he always giving me so many zits.
752
00:39:42,125 --> 00:39:44,000
And why does Apple
keep changing their chargers?
753
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:46,333
And why did my dad's doctor operate
on the wrong shoulder?
754
00:39:46,333 --> 00:39:48,666
And why do I have to share a room
with my grandma?
755
00:39:50,333 --> 00:39:51,958
Okay, okay, okay.
756
00:39:51,958 --> 00:39:56,458
I think I can explain zits
and climate change and gay TikTok.
757
00:39:56,458 --> 00:39:58,583
- She scares me sometimes.
- You too?
758
00:40:00,541 --> 00:40:02,125
Musically!
759
00:40:02,125 --> 00:40:08,333
♪ If God is real, then why is there war? ♪
760
00:40:09,041 --> 00:40:12,041
♪ Why is there injustice? ♪
761
00:40:12,041 --> 00:40:14,500
♪ Why are people poor? ♪
762
00:40:15,166 --> 00:40:20,625
♪And why have I had a yeast infection ♪
763
00:40:20,625 --> 00:40:25,833
♪ for a solid 11 years? ♪
764
00:40:25,833 --> 00:40:28,583
♪ The answer is clear ♪
765
00:40:31,750 --> 00:40:33,708
- ♪ God is random ♪
766
00:40:33,708 --> 00:40:35,625
♪ God is random ♪
767
00:40:35,625 --> 00:40:37,208
♪ God is random sauce ♪
768
00:40:37,208 --> 00:40:38,375
Everybody!
769
00:40:38,375 --> 00:40:40,166
♪ God is random ♪
770
00:40:40,166 --> 00:40:41,791
♪ God is random ♪
771
00:40:42,291 --> 00:40:44,500
Your prayer book
is the playbill, cutie-pops...
772
00:40:44,500 --> 00:40:46,375
...razzle-dazzle.
773
00:41:11,333 --> 00:41:12,416
Seema!
774
00:41:14,666 --> 00:41:17,291
What did Rabbi Rebecca say
about being on your phone?
775
00:41:18,208 --> 00:41:21,083
Right? Aaron knows what I'm talking about.
Come on, dude.
776
00:41:22,583 --> 00:41:24,833
- Yup, Baruch HaShem, Aaron.
- Yes, sir.
777
00:41:31,458 --> 00:41:34,125
All right, what's going on, young lady?
778
00:41:34,125 --> 00:41:36,916
You used to be such a good,
respectful kid.
779
00:41:36,916 --> 00:41:39,791
Now, you're on your phone.
You're not practicing your portion.
780
00:41:39,791 --> 00:41:42,333
Talk to me, sis.
What's crappenin'?
781
00:41:43,583 --> 00:41:47,375
Do you know what your portion is about?
Do you understand Ki Tisa?
782
00:41:47,875 --> 00:41:50,750
Yeah. Lots of golden calf talk
and stuff like that.
783
00:41:51,875 --> 00:41:55,916
Yeah, but it's also about becoming
your own individual person.
784
00:41:55,916 --> 00:41:58,291
It's about taking responsibilities
for your mistakes.
785
00:41:58,291 --> 00:41:59,625
You know, grown-up stuff?
786
00:42:00,291 --> 00:42:01,916
Let me take a wild guess.
787
00:42:01,916 --> 00:42:04,666
You haven't started
your mitzvah project yet either, huh?
788
00:42:05,625 --> 00:42:07,166
I'm narrowing it down.
789
00:42:07,166 --> 00:42:10,541
Seema, I'm telling you,
the sooner you do your mitzvah,
790
00:42:10,541 --> 00:42:13,083
which is a good deed,
a commandment by the way,
791
00:42:13,083 --> 00:42:15,583
the sooner you'll find
things falling into place.
792
00:42:17,458 --> 00:42:19,625
Wait, so, if I do a mitzvah,
God will reward me?
793
00:42:19,625 --> 00:42:22,583
- No, not reward--
- And he'll give me what I want?
794
00:42:22,583 --> 00:42:24,208
Well, I definitely did not say that.
795
00:42:24,208 --> 00:42:26,875
No, thank you, Rabbi. You helped me
so much. I gotta get to work.
796
00:42:26,875 --> 00:42:28,000
Wait. No, no, no!
797
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:30,083
Gotta start my journey, Rabbi Rebecca!
798
00:42:30,083 --> 00:42:31,208
Can you get me a Gatorade?
799
00:42:48,333 --> 00:42:50,458
Hey, uh, can I sit here?
- Sure.
800
00:43:11,541 --> 00:43:12,458
Hey.
801
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,125
You wouldn't happen
to know why people keep asking me
802
00:43:16,125 --> 00:43:18,500
if they can floss their teeth
with my nipple hair today,
803
00:43:18,500 --> 00:43:19,833
do you, Stacy?
804
00:43:19,833 --> 00:43:21,625
Uh, no.
805
00:43:21,625 --> 00:43:24,875
You know, seventh grade is hard enough
without people pointing and laughing at me
806
00:43:24,875 --> 00:43:28,250
whenever I walk down the hall,
screaming out, "Here, comes spider-nips."
807
00:43:28,250 --> 00:43:30,958
Better than, "Here comes Aunt Flow
and the Blood-Pads!"
808
00:43:30,958 --> 00:43:32,291
But that really happened, Stacy.
809
00:43:32,291 --> 00:43:35,250
- How do I know your nipples are hairless?
- Because you do!
810
00:43:37,291 --> 00:43:40,500
Why are you dating him?
I thought it was just one kiss?
811
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,666
And stop doing Rabbi Rebecca impressions
to Andy.
812
00:43:43,666 --> 00:43:45,958
That's my impression,
you freaking ripoff artist!
813
00:43:45,958 --> 00:43:49,333
And I'm the star,
cutie-pops, razzle-dazzle!
814
00:43:50,833 --> 00:43:53,708
That sounds so much like her!
Do Cantor Jerry.
815
00:43:54,375 --> 00:43:55,416
I don't know how.
816
00:43:56,458 --> 00:43:58,625
Boo!
817
00:43:58,625 --> 00:44:01,958
- Um, uh, chicken?
- Ronnie? Ronnie.
818
00:44:01,958 --> 00:44:04,541
Can you help with my mitzvah project?
I need to get on that ASAP.
819
00:44:04,541 --> 00:44:07,416
I'm kind of in the middle of something.
Oh, chicken parmesan!
820
00:44:07,416 --> 00:44:08,416
Correct.
821
00:44:08,416 --> 00:44:11,291
Honey, why don't you and Lydia
do something with the homeless
822
00:44:11,291 --> 00:44:13,458
or volunteer at the animal shelter?
823
00:44:13,458 --> 00:44:16,041
Cause it’s my Bat Mitzvah
and I’m not doing my project with Lydia.
824
00:44:16,041 --> 00:44:17,208
It's a statement about me.
825
00:44:17,208 --> 00:44:19,375
Stace, that's what you said
about the egg roll piñata.
826
00:44:19,375 --> 00:44:21,041
- And the dress.
- And your hair.
827
00:44:21,041 --> 00:44:23,125
Shut up, Zaara. Why are you always here?
828
00:44:23,125 --> 00:44:24,375
- Hey.
829
00:44:24,375 --> 00:44:27,041
Ugh! You guys don't get what this means.
Nobody does.
830
00:44:29,125 --> 00:44:30,916
Biggest drama queen in the room?
831
00:44:30,916 --> 00:44:33,750
- Correct.
- Oh my God! You're not funny.
832
00:44:33,750 --> 00:44:35,208
Girls, leave her alone.
833
00:44:40,125 --> 00:44:42,541
Vayar Aharon
834
00:44:42,541 --> 00:44:46,666
vayiven mizbayach l'fanav
835
00:44:47,166 --> 00:44:49,750
vayikra Aharon
836
00:44:50,375 --> 00:44:52,500
- Ugh. Oh my God.
837
00:44:53,541 --> 00:44:56,208
Vayar Aharon
838
00:44:56,208 --> 00:44:58,291
-vayiven mizbayach l'fanav
839
00:44:58,291 --> 00:45:00,166
- What the heck?
840
00:45:18,541 --> 00:45:20,791
If that was you
and a boy, what would you do?
841
00:45:25,416 --> 00:45:27,166
Let's get a closeup of that one.
842
00:45:27,166 --> 00:45:28,541
Hmm. Look at that.
843
00:45:28,541 --> 00:45:30,458
-Mmm, mmm, mmm.
844
00:45:32,875 --> 00:45:36,458
- Why do you always do that?
- I like the way my feet smell!
845
00:45:36,458 --> 00:45:39,000
- She sounds like a lawnmower. So loud!
846
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:43,208
Did you get the full flip?
847
00:45:43,208 --> 00:45:45,875
- I got a full booger.
- Stop. Erase that right now, please.
848
00:45:45,875 --> 00:45:47,166
This is how I'm gonna kiss.
849
00:45:48,083 --> 00:45:50,000
We're waiting for her to pop a pimple.
850
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:51,916
Oh my God, I think I peed myself.
851
00:45:51,916 --> 00:45:54,291
Kym and Megan and Anya, they suck.
852
00:45:54,291 --> 00:45:55,500
They're very dumb.
853
00:45:55,500 --> 00:45:56,916
Her real toes are hairy.
854
00:45:59,166 --> 00:46:01,250
What is the biggest lie
you've ever told?
855
00:46:01,833 --> 00:46:03,875
Have you ever farted from the front?
856
00:46:03,875 --> 00:46:06,000
- Yeah, like your vajayjay?
-Juicy!
857
00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:08,916
- Want me to show you? I have to prepare.
- Yes. Let's see it.
858
00:46:08,916 --> 00:46:10,708
Stop. You have an exercise?
859
00:46:11,416 --> 00:46:13,083
No, poor Nikki.
860
00:46:17,375 --> 00:46:19,291
I was showing them how to queef.
861
00:46:19,291 --> 00:46:20,541
Wha--
862
00:46:34,083 --> 00:46:35,791
You better not show this to anyone.
863
00:46:35,791 --> 00:46:37,833
I swear to God,
if you show this to anyone,
864
00:46:37,833 --> 00:46:39,083
I literally will murder you.
865
00:46:39,083 --> 00:46:40,750
You understand this? You understand that?
866
00:46:40,750 --> 00:46:42,875
- I wouldn't do that.
- Okay, good.
867
00:46:42,875 --> 00:46:43,833
Love you.
868
00:46:47,666 --> 00:46:49,875
Stop, I'm being serious.
This could be dangerous.
869
00:46:51,541 --> 00:46:53,416
They're both nuts together.
870
00:46:53,416 --> 00:46:55,625
Stacy, stop smothering Lydia.
871
00:46:55,625 --> 00:46:58,666
- Aw, that's nice!
872
00:46:58,666 --> 00:47:02,083
Thanks for watching. Bye!
873
00:47:11,833 --> 00:47:14,916
Vayar Aharon
874
00:47:14,916 --> 00:47:19,083
vayiven mizbayach l'fanav
875
00:47:19,083 --> 00:47:21,083
vayikra Aharon
876
00:47:21,083 --> 00:47:22,375
My lo--
877
00:47:24,666 --> 00:47:28,750
♪ I'm here, my love
But I'm floating, baby ♪
878
00:47:28,750 --> 00:47:31,416
♪ Hold me down tight
When I'm losing my mind... ♪
879
00:47:32,416 --> 00:47:37,083
Oh yeah! Mazel tov to Benjamin!
880
00:47:38,833 --> 00:47:40,333
Schmule--
881
00:47:40,958 --> 00:47:42,000
Hey, Schmuley!
882
00:47:42,583 --> 00:47:43,583
What, what, what?
883
00:47:43,583 --> 00:47:46,166
Can you play
"Don't Stop Believing" by Journey?
884
00:47:47,416 --> 00:47:50,750
Whoa. What a deep cut.
885
00:47:50,750 --> 00:47:55,416
Get out of here with that shit!
Let Schmuley handle the vibe around here!
886
00:47:59,208 --> 00:48:02,375
Make some noise, party people!
887
00:48:09,375 --> 00:48:10,916
♪ To get to you ♪
888
00:48:16,916 --> 00:48:19,083
- Oh. Yeah.
- It's too loud in here.
889
00:48:19,083 --> 00:48:23,500
You know, we didn't have to suffer with
these Bat Mitzvahs when we were your age.
890
00:48:23,500 --> 00:48:27,666
We just celebrated with our families,
and poof, you're a woman.
891
00:48:27,666 --> 00:48:29,666
- Yeah.
- Girls didn't have Bat Mitzvahs?
892
00:48:29,666 --> 00:48:33,833
My mother told me girls were born
into God's kingdom, so we didn't have to.
893
00:48:34,541 --> 00:48:37,250
She was full of it.
She was just trying to save money.
894
00:48:43,458 --> 00:48:44,458
Go. Just go.
895
00:48:45,916 --> 00:48:48,958
Man, that's all-time.
You ever seen Evil Dead 2?
896
00:48:48,958 --> 00:48:51,541
- Yeah, we saw it. It was weak.
- Yeah, just like you two.
897
00:48:51,541 --> 00:48:53,875
Ugh. Could you
just let us watch our movie?
898
00:48:54,625 --> 00:48:55,666
Okay.
899
00:48:55,666 --> 00:48:58,333
♪ I've been running with the wolves
To get to you ♪
900
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:14,083
What's going on?
901
00:49:14,083 --> 00:49:16,041
Why are you hanging out
with us old people right now?
902
00:49:16,041 --> 00:49:19,083
- Why are you not with your friends?
- I have a stomach ache.
903
00:49:19,083 --> 00:49:22,375
You have a stomach ache?
All right. I'll get you a ginger ale.
904
00:49:23,041 --> 00:49:25,666
You're not hot. You feel fine.
905
00:49:27,125 --> 00:49:28,833
You don't have a stomach ache.
906
00:49:30,458 --> 00:49:33,041
How come you're not hanging out
with Lydia tonight?
907
00:49:33,041 --> 00:49:34,083
She betrayed me.
908
00:49:34,083 --> 00:49:37,416
She kissed my crush,
and then he touched her underboob in PE.
909
00:49:37,416 --> 00:49:39,416
- Oh.
- Oy, underboob.
910
00:49:39,416 --> 00:49:41,708
Oh, I got plenty of that.
911
00:49:41,708 --> 00:49:45,208
Underboob, overboob,
sideboob, behindboob, I got all of it.
912
00:49:45,208 --> 00:49:46,500
Oh.
913
00:49:46,500 --> 00:49:48,708
You know, bubelah, when I was young,
914
00:49:48,708 --> 00:49:52,375
my best friend Susie Rebenstock
and I fought over a boy,
915
00:49:52,375 --> 00:49:54,125
and I stopped talking to her.
916
00:49:54,125 --> 00:49:57,208
Fifty years later,
I ran into her brother at Zabar's.
917
00:49:57,208 --> 00:50:00,083
Turns out,
she threw herself off a roof at 32.
918
00:50:00,083 --> 00:50:03,041
I let a stupid boy come between us,
919
00:50:03,041 --> 00:50:05,833
and now she's lying dead
at the bottom of the Chrysler Building.
920
00:50:05,833 --> 00:50:07,250
Oh my God.
921
00:50:07,250 --> 00:50:10,166
- It was McDonald's.
- Whatever! You get my point.
922
00:50:10,666 --> 00:50:13,375
All I'm saying is we girls
have to stick together!
923
00:50:13,375 --> 00:50:14,625
- Yeah.
- Hear, hear.
924
00:50:23,708 --> 00:50:24,666
Megan!
925
00:50:26,375 --> 00:50:28,958
Okay. Here, Tatala, huh?
926
00:50:28,958 --> 00:50:30,500
- Thank you.
- Okay.
927
00:50:30,500 --> 00:50:31,791
- Hiya, ladies.
- Hello.
928
00:50:31,791 --> 00:50:33,458
- Hey, hey.
- And gentleman.
929
00:50:34,750 --> 00:50:36,208
Mind if I take your extra rolls?
930
00:50:36,208 --> 00:50:38,583
I'm making up a plate
for Andy Goldfarb's grandmother.
931
00:50:38,583 --> 00:50:39,958
Oh, that's nice.
932
00:50:39,958 --> 00:50:42,041
- What a respectful boy you are.
- That's sweet.
933
00:50:42,041 --> 00:50:43,666
- Here's some basketball rolls.
-Gracias.
934
00:50:43,666 --> 00:50:46,125
Wait, why are you making a plate
for Andy's grandma?
935
00:50:46,125 --> 00:50:48,291
She only gets Jell-O
at her retirement home.
936
00:50:48,291 --> 00:50:52,333
I thought that I'd get real food for Andy
to bring to her when he visits tomorrow.
937
00:50:52,333 --> 00:50:54,541
Wait, Andy's grandma's
in a retirement home?
938
00:50:55,500 --> 00:50:56,583
That's awesome.
939
00:50:57,291 --> 00:50:58,833
Wait, why is that awesome?
940
00:51:21,375 --> 00:51:22,875
Ooh! The bookies are here!
941
00:51:32,416 --> 00:51:35,041
Andy? Oh, hey!
942
00:51:35,916 --> 00:51:36,750
Yo.
943
00:51:38,833 --> 00:51:40,375
What are you doing here?
944
00:51:40,375 --> 00:51:42,333
I'm just visiting my grandma.
945
00:51:42,333 --> 00:51:46,333
She's taking a nap right now,
so I got to sit here till I get picked up.
946
00:51:46,333 --> 00:51:48,541
It's so sweet that you visit her.
947
00:51:48,541 --> 00:51:51,833
Yeah, my moms say
they'll take away my Xbox if I don't. So...
948
00:51:53,458 --> 00:51:54,541
So...
949
00:51:55,875 --> 00:51:57,750
Are you excited about your Bar Mitzvah?
950
00:51:57,750 --> 00:51:59,291
Yeah, it should be all right.
951
00:51:59,291 --> 00:52:00,791
That's dope.
952
00:52:03,750 --> 00:52:06,916
Yeah, but Lydia, she's being all salty
953
00:52:06,916 --> 00:52:09,833
'cause she has to miss
some dumb dance competition to go.
954
00:52:09,833 --> 00:52:11,416
Ugh. I hate how competitive she is.
955
00:52:11,416 --> 00:52:14,083
It's just like,
why can't it be about the dancing?
956
00:52:14,083 --> 00:52:17,666
Well, I mean, I play soccer,
and soccer is pretty competitive.
957
00:52:17,666 --> 00:52:21,541
Uh, well, soccer's a sport.
Dance is an art.
958
00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:24,208
Facts.
959
00:52:24,791 --> 00:52:25,875
Real talk.
960
00:52:26,500 --> 00:52:28,125
Andy Goldfarb.
961
00:52:28,125 --> 00:52:30,500
Um, yeah. Uber's here. Gotta bounce.
962
00:52:30,500 --> 00:52:32,541
Okay. So nice running into you.
963
00:52:32,541 --> 00:52:33,833
Yeah, cool.
964
00:52:36,958 --> 00:52:38,500
- Hey.
- Yo!
965
00:52:39,541 --> 00:52:41,500
- Too slow, boy!
- Jesus.
966
00:52:41,500 --> 00:52:45,416
Can't guard me.
Ha ha, old man! Goldfarb rules!
967
00:52:46,875 --> 00:52:49,125
Still waitin' on me bookies!
968
00:52:49,125 --> 00:52:50,375
It's right here.
969
00:52:52,250 --> 00:52:53,583
I don't want that one.
970
00:53:00,583 --> 00:53:04,416
Hello, Joe. Can you refill
my popcorn please? Extra butter.
971
00:53:05,041 --> 00:53:06,041
On it.
972
00:53:08,833 --> 00:53:10,208
I love this Carnivale theme,
973
00:53:10,208 --> 00:53:12,958
but your Candyland theme
is going to be the best of the year.
974
00:53:12,958 --> 00:53:15,875
Well, until your New York
theme puts the entire school to shame!
975
00:53:15,875 --> 00:53:16,958
Yeah.
976
00:53:16,958 --> 00:53:19,083
Why'd we eat
so many Twizzlers last night?
977
00:53:19,083 --> 00:53:20,416
I don't know!
978
00:53:20,416 --> 00:53:21,500
Hey, Stacy.
979
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:23,291
Oh, hey, Mateo.
980
00:53:23,291 --> 00:53:26,250
Hey, can you believe no Bar
or Bat Mitzvah tonight?
981
00:53:26,250 --> 00:53:27,541
Get to go to the movies.
982
00:53:27,541 --> 00:53:29,416
What are you seeing?
983
00:53:29,416 --> 00:53:31,583
I'm not sure. Andy bought the tickets.
984
00:53:31,583 --> 00:53:33,625
- Andy's here?
- Yeah.
985
00:53:36,416 --> 00:53:39,208
- Sorry, the butter nozzle's jammed.
- No, it's fine. I don't need butter.
986
00:53:39,208 --> 00:53:41,541
- All good. I know you love butter.
- No, I really don't need butter.
987
00:53:41,541 --> 00:53:43,583
I'll grab a coat hanger.
This is all fixed.
988
00:53:43,583 --> 00:53:45,375
- Dude, give me the popcorn!
- Stacy Friedman.
989
00:53:45,375 --> 00:53:47,541
Hey, Kym! What's up?
990
00:53:48,250 --> 00:53:51,208
Hey, yo, what's poppin'?
How's the bookie business?
991
00:53:51,208 --> 00:53:53,000
Booming. Still got your Xbox?
992
00:53:53,583 --> 00:53:54,416
You know it.
993
00:53:54,416 --> 00:53:55,791
That's what's up.
994
00:53:56,958 --> 00:53:59,000
Bubie, what's taking you so long?
995
00:53:59,000 --> 00:54:01,291
Is the guy mad at us
for getting three refills?
996
00:54:01,291 --> 00:54:02,625
Where is that dude?
997
00:54:02,625 --> 00:54:03,916
Oh, your friends are here.
998
00:54:03,916 --> 00:54:06,500
What's up, everybody?
Nice to see you guys.
999
00:54:06,500 --> 00:54:09,958
- I like your robe, man!
- Oh yeah, the kid likes the drip.
1000
00:54:09,958 --> 00:54:11,125
I like your taste.
1001
00:54:11,125 --> 00:54:13,166
So I'm gonna go outside and get a blanket
1002
00:54:13,166 --> 00:54:15,500
from the trunk of the car
'cause it's freezing in there.
1003
00:54:15,500 --> 00:54:18,541
We can kind of snuggle
like we used to. All right?
1004
00:54:18,541 --> 00:54:21,833
Always fun, right? Blanket time?
You know what I'm talking about, bro?
1005
00:54:22,750 --> 00:54:24,416
- Wha--
- I see you back there, Lydia.
1006
00:54:24,416 --> 00:54:26,583
- How you doing, kiddo?
- Oh, hey.
1007
00:54:26,583 --> 00:54:29,500
- Love ya. Say hi to your folks.
- Yeah, of course.
1008
00:54:29,500 --> 00:54:31,125
- Miss you, buddy.
- See you.
1009
00:54:32,791 --> 00:54:33,916
You-- Oh...
1010
00:54:44,958 --> 00:54:46,750
Stacy! We're here.
1011
00:54:49,083 --> 00:54:50,291
Did you fall off a motorcycle?
1012
00:54:50,291 --> 00:54:53,416
- Did you eat nuts? Do you need an EpiPen?
- Why do you look like a bad IG filter?
1013
00:54:53,416 --> 00:54:55,208
Can periods happen to your face?
1014
00:54:55,208 --> 00:54:56,500
Shut up. Come in.
1015
00:54:57,041 --> 00:54:59,708
- What are you wearing? Oh my God.
- Scandy!
1016
00:54:59,708 --> 00:55:00,666
Guys...
1017
00:55:06,208 --> 00:55:08,791
Tara, you're putting the lighting
in the camera. Okay, yeah.
1018
00:55:08,791 --> 00:55:11,583
- Lift it higher. Make sure I'm glowing.
- I'm not built for this.
1019
00:55:11,583 --> 00:55:14,500
You know, I really thought we were
just gonna hang out and make slime.
1020
00:55:14,500 --> 00:55:15,916
Oh my God, we're women now.
1021
00:55:17,041 --> 00:55:17,875
Maybe later.
1022
00:55:18,458 --> 00:55:19,375
How does this look?
1023
00:55:20,833 --> 00:55:22,125
Like your goldfish died.
1024
00:55:22,125 --> 00:55:23,166
Hey, just switch it up.
1025
00:55:23,750 --> 00:55:25,041
- Okay.
- There you go.
1026
00:55:26,083 --> 00:55:27,958
Seduce me. Okay? Just seduce me.
1027
00:55:27,958 --> 00:55:30,500
Oh, way better. Slay, queen.
1028
00:55:30,500 --> 00:55:32,750
Guys, this is so lame.
1029
00:55:32,750 --> 00:55:35,416
I thought we could be, like,
this iconic best friend trio, you know?
1030
00:55:35,416 --> 00:55:37,333
Now that Lydia broke up with you and all.
1031
00:55:38,333 --> 00:55:42,041
Uh-oh. Now you look like all the goldfish
in the world just died.
1032
00:55:42,041 --> 00:55:45,583
No, it's fine. Let's just take
more pictures and then change outfits.
1033
00:55:45,583 --> 00:55:47,958
- There's more outfits?
- That's-- Okay. Yeah.
1034
00:55:50,125 --> 00:55:51,875
- Are you serious?
- Geez, Stace.
1035
00:55:51,875 --> 00:55:54,041
Whoa, what is happening?
1036
00:55:54,583 --> 00:55:56,166
Uh, taking pictures.
1037
00:55:56,166 --> 00:55:57,666
You look insane.
1038
00:55:57,666 --> 00:55:59,958
Uh, we're gonna go get some boba
and then watch a movie,
1039
00:55:59,958 --> 00:56:01,333
Evil Dead 2, if you wanna come.
1040
00:56:01,333 --> 00:56:02,833
- Yeah, just--
- Oh, thank God.
1041
00:56:02,833 --> 00:56:03,875
Yes!
1042
00:56:03,875 --> 00:56:05,833
What happened to your armpits?
1043
00:56:05,833 --> 00:56:08,250
Oh, I shaved this morning.
It did not go well.
1044
00:56:08,833 --> 00:56:10,958
It's fine! I didn't need you anyway.
1045
00:56:19,041 --> 00:56:20,625
Don't you love puzzles?
1046
00:56:21,958 --> 00:56:23,125
Puzzles are corny.
1047
00:56:23,625 --> 00:56:24,958
Facts.
1048
00:56:32,666 --> 00:56:35,875
I have a question. Is Lydia a good kisser?
1049
00:56:37,333 --> 00:56:38,208
She's a'ight.
1050
00:56:39,208 --> 00:56:40,666
A'ight? Huh.
1051
00:56:41,375 --> 00:56:43,500
Probably because you were her first kiss.
1052
00:56:43,500 --> 00:56:46,708
No, she's told me she's kissed a bunch
of guys before.
1053
00:56:47,416 --> 00:56:48,416
At camp?
1054
00:56:49,333 --> 00:56:50,250
Yes.
1055
00:56:50,250 --> 00:56:54,333
Does her tight-lipped technique
suggest a high level of experience?
1056
00:56:54,333 --> 00:56:57,791
Nah, it's like she thinks she's kissing
a stuffed animal or something.
1057
00:56:57,791 --> 00:57:00,416
Plus, every time I try to move my hand,
she starts laughing,
1058
00:57:00,416 --> 00:57:01,750
says she's mad ticklish.
1059
00:57:01,750 --> 00:57:04,375
You have the patience
of a saint.
1060
00:57:04,916 --> 00:57:06,125
A Jewish saint.
1061
00:57:07,833 --> 00:57:08,708
True.
1062
00:57:12,916 --> 00:57:14,333
Twenty points for me.
1063
00:57:14,333 --> 00:57:15,666
Get it, Grandma.
1064
00:57:15,666 --> 00:57:18,708
Want a picture of you and your grandma
to prove to your moms you're here?
1065
00:57:19,375 --> 00:57:22,041
Uh, yeah. That's low-key a good idea.
1066
00:57:24,041 --> 00:57:25,041
Okay.
1067
00:57:31,625 --> 00:57:33,500
- Yeah, Grandma.
- Hilarious.
1068
00:57:34,250 --> 00:57:36,041
I have to prove
to Rabbi Rebecca I'm here too.
1069
00:57:36,041 --> 00:57:38,125
I'm volunteering for my mitzvah project.
1070
00:57:38,125 --> 00:57:40,125
- That's what's up.
- Here, I'll send it to you.
1071
00:57:40,625 --> 00:57:43,291
- For sure.
- Oh, shoot. I just sent you more pics.
1072
00:57:43,291 --> 00:57:45,208
- Just ignore.
- Andy Goldfarb.
1073
00:57:53,375 --> 00:57:54,666
Nice.
1074
00:58:00,083 --> 00:58:02,791
- That one's way too big on me.
- Okey-dokey.
1075
00:58:04,541 --> 00:58:07,166
Well, why don't you try the strapless one?
1076
00:58:08,958 --> 00:58:12,041
So, how's Lydia's entrance video
coming along?
1077
00:58:13,416 --> 00:58:15,041
I finished it this weekend.
1078
00:58:15,041 --> 00:58:15,958
Great!
1079
00:58:16,666 --> 00:58:17,541
No.
1080
00:58:17,541 --> 00:58:18,791
Why is it a no?
1081
00:58:18,791 --> 00:58:20,458
Just-- it's just a no.
1082
00:58:20,458 --> 00:58:22,625
Well, okay, then try the last one on.
1083
00:58:22,625 --> 00:58:24,208
No, that's the worst one!
1084
00:58:24,208 --> 00:58:25,500
Well, just try it!
1085
00:58:25,500 --> 00:58:26,750
Oh my God.
1086
00:58:26,750 --> 00:58:29,541
- It's so ugly, Mom.
1087
00:58:29,541 --> 00:58:31,583
Maybe it'll look good when it's on you.
1088
00:58:33,875 --> 00:58:36,125
Oh.
1089
00:58:37,458 --> 00:58:38,375
You know what?
1090
00:58:39,666 --> 00:58:41,000
I like this.
1091
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:44,125
I look like the lady
at school that pulls kids out of class
1092
00:58:44,125 --> 00:58:46,125
when their parents get into car accidents.
1093
00:58:46,125 --> 00:58:47,750
How often does that happen?
1094
00:58:48,875 --> 00:58:52,666
Can we please get this dress?
Come on. It's the dream dress.
1095
00:58:52,666 --> 00:58:54,333
It costs more than our house.
1096
00:58:54,333 --> 00:58:57,083
Okay, so wear the cheap dress
in front of God. Got it.
1097
00:58:57,083 --> 00:58:58,416
It's not cheap.
1098
00:58:58,416 --> 00:58:59,958
It's reasonable.
1099
00:58:59,958 --> 00:59:03,166
That's what every kid wants to hear
on the most important day of their life.
1100
00:59:03,166 --> 00:59:05,625
"Wow, Stacy, you look so reasonable."
1101
00:59:05,625 --> 00:59:07,541
You know what? This is a nice,
1102
00:59:08,541 --> 00:59:12,541
temple-friendly, well-priced dress. And--
1103
00:59:12,541 --> 00:59:15,875
No. Don't say it. Please, Mom.
Please, I beg you.
1104
00:59:16,375 --> 00:59:19,791
- We're gettin' it.
- Oh my God! You're ruining me!
1105
00:59:20,958 --> 00:59:22,666
So ugly, Mom.
1106
00:59:23,333 --> 00:59:26,791
- So, is this, like, a swipe or a chip?
- Yeah, it's a chip.
1107
00:59:26,791 --> 00:59:30,166
Good? Okay.
Wait, did I take it out too soon?
1108
00:59:32,916 --> 00:59:35,375
Why? We could color coordinate.
1109
00:59:35,375 --> 00:59:37,375
We're not color coordinating, Mom.
We're not doing that.
1110
00:59:37,375 --> 00:59:39,000
- You want to ruin me?
- [Gabi Okay. No.
1111
00:59:39,000 --> 00:59:41,416
It looks like something
the counselor at school wears, Mom.
1112
00:59:41,416 --> 00:59:43,875
- Okay, okay.
- Please, I'm not wearing that.
1113
00:59:44,708 --> 00:59:47,125
- Yeah, I got that app too.
- Eli!
1114
00:59:47,125 --> 00:59:48,958
- What?
- What do you think?
1115
00:59:48,958 --> 00:59:51,208
What? Uh, Rudy, hold on a second.
1116
00:59:51,708 --> 00:59:54,041
I'm at a family function or something, uh...
1117
00:59:54,916 --> 00:59:58,958
Yeah, that dress is gorgeous, kiddo.
Only the best.
1118
00:59:58,958 --> 01:00:01,500
Papi, you don't even know
which one we're talking about.
1119
01:00:01,500 --> 01:00:04,416
It's the prettiest one.
Just like you, pumpkin.
1120
01:00:05,166 --> 01:00:07,541
Twenty-three skidoo! Wee!
1121
01:00:07,541 --> 01:00:10,333
Okay, yeah,
I think you gave me a good price.
1122
01:00:11,250 --> 01:00:13,708
Mom? Mom, can we go?
1123
01:00:13,708 --> 01:00:15,833
Yeah, okay. Take the dress.
1124
01:00:15,833 --> 01:00:17,541
- Thank you.
- Okay.
1125
01:00:17,541 --> 01:00:18,875
So great. We got a great deal.
1126
01:00:18,875 --> 01:00:20,250
Where's Daddy? I don't remember--
1127
01:00:20,250 --> 01:00:21,958
- No.
- Gabi!
1128
01:00:21,958 --> 01:00:22,875
Bree?!
1129
01:00:22,875 --> 01:00:24,500
Lydia! Lydia's here--
1130
01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:26,583
Oh my God! I haven't seen you in forever!
1131
01:00:26,583 --> 01:00:27,833
Hi!
1132
01:00:28,500 --> 01:00:31,291
Just like the two of us
to be getting dresses at the last minute.
1133
01:00:31,291 --> 01:00:32,916
Why plan ahead, right?
1134
01:00:34,041 --> 01:00:35,416
How are you? How's Stace?
1135
01:00:35,416 --> 01:00:39,166
She's good. I miss Lydia.
She hasn't been over in a while.
1136
01:00:39,166 --> 01:00:40,875
Eli! It's so great to see you.
1137
01:00:40,875 --> 01:00:42,125
How you doing?
1138
01:00:42,125 --> 01:00:44,375
Terrific. We're getting divorced.
1139
01:00:45,000 --> 01:00:47,875
Oh yeah. I'm-- I heard. I'm so sorry.
1140
01:00:47,875 --> 01:00:50,291
I'm not. I'm on six dating apps.
1141
01:00:50,291 --> 01:00:52,250
Six? Wow, that's a lot.
1142
01:00:52,250 --> 01:00:53,750
Andy broke up with me.
1143
01:00:54,416 --> 01:00:57,208
Hmm. Sorry to hear that.
You were the perfect couple.
1144
01:00:58,291 --> 01:01:02,166
He said he couldn't deal with the
ticklishness or the closed mouth kissing.
1145
01:01:03,333 --> 01:01:04,875
Sucks for you, I guess.
1146
01:01:06,083 --> 01:01:09,458
Said he heard
I lied about kissing boys in camp.
1147
01:01:10,291 --> 01:01:13,333
Well, you did lie. So...
1148
01:01:19,291 --> 01:01:20,291
See you at temple?
1149
01:01:20,291 --> 01:01:21,875
- See you at temple.
- Okay.
1150
01:01:21,875 --> 01:01:24,291
Anyhoo. Gonna go.
1151
01:01:25,166 --> 01:01:26,583
- Happy shopping!
- Yeah!
1152
01:01:26,583 --> 01:01:28,583
- Bye, Eli! Enjoy those dating apps.
- Yeah.
1153
01:01:28,583 --> 01:01:30,625
- Bye, Stacy.
- See ya! Come on, honey.
1154
01:01:32,125 --> 01:01:33,375
What's that mom's name again?
1155
01:01:33,375 --> 01:01:35,083
Bree.
1156
01:01:35,083 --> 01:01:36,375
Are you kidding me?
1157
01:01:37,041 --> 01:01:39,666
You need to get your fat head
in the game, Eli.
1158
01:01:39,666 --> 01:01:42,791
Stacy's father, Danny,
if you could remember names,
1159
01:01:42,791 --> 01:01:47,083
who we've known since kindergarten,
is so involved in every single detail!
1160
01:01:47,083 --> 01:01:48,791
Oh, he is?
1161
01:01:48,791 --> 01:01:52,666
So, which detail is that?
1162
01:01:54,416 --> 01:01:57,000
- He's exhausted from being a good dad.
1163
01:01:57,000 --> 01:01:59,208
Honey. You wish.
1164
01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:01,250
Can we get ice cream?
1165
01:02:03,166 --> 01:02:05,708
- Did you guys already get ice cream?
- No, we didn't.
1166
01:02:06,208 --> 01:02:09,125
♪ Bim bam bim bim bam ♪
1167
01:02:09,750 --> 01:02:11,541
♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪
1168
01:02:11,541 --> 01:02:13,041
♪ Chiri chiri chiri ♪
1169
01:02:13,041 --> 01:02:16,458
♪ Bim bam bim bim bam ♪
1170
01:02:16,458 --> 01:02:19,708
♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪
1171
01:02:19,708 --> 01:02:23,541
- ♪ Shabbat shalom ♪
- Hey!
1172
01:02:23,541 --> 01:02:26,958
♪ Shabbat, shabbat
Shabbat, shabbat shalom ♪
1173
01:02:26,958 --> 01:02:30,125
♪ Bim bam bim bim bim bam ♪
1174
01:02:30,125 --> 01:02:33,791
♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪
1175
01:02:33,791 --> 01:02:35,041
Yes, Seema?
1176
01:02:35,041 --> 01:02:37,333
- Can I go to the bathroom?
- Yes you can.
1177
01:02:37,333 --> 01:02:41,000
Go pee-pee, but quickly.
1178
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:42,250
So quickly.
1179
01:02:43,250 --> 01:02:48,375
♪ Bim bim bim bim bim bam ♪
1180
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:53,125
- Thank you, thank you!
- Bravo! Slay, queen!
1181
01:02:55,041 --> 01:02:58,791
Does anyone know the significance
of that particular piece of music, huh?
1182
01:02:59,583 --> 01:03:02,416
Yes, Andy, please enlighten us.
1183
01:03:03,375 --> 01:03:05,208
I gotta go to the bathroom too.
1184
01:03:05,208 --> 01:03:07,833
No one thinks to take a whiz
before they come to class?
1185
01:03:07,833 --> 01:03:09,750
Fine, Andy, but quickly!
1186
01:03:09,750 --> 01:03:13,000
- So quickly.
- So quickly.
1187
01:03:13,000 --> 01:03:15,125
So quickly.
1188
01:03:15,125 --> 01:03:16,875
Go, Andy.
1189
01:03:16,875 --> 01:03:18,583
Go, Andy.
1190
01:03:18,583 --> 01:03:20,250
Good luck, Andy.
1191
01:03:20,250 --> 01:03:22,375
Good luck, Andy.
1192
01:03:22,375 --> 01:03:27,583
Hopefully, it's not number two!
1193
01:03:30,333 --> 01:03:32,625
It's Mr. Mateo!
1194
01:03:34,166 --> 01:03:37,125
- Mr. Potatoes.
- Mr. Potato.
1195
01:03:37,125 --> 01:03:38,125
Hey, Stacy!
1196
01:03:38,125 --> 01:03:41,666
Can't believe you're not even Jewish,
and you come to temple more than I do.
1197
01:03:41,666 --> 01:03:44,375
Yeah, I go to church every Sunday.
1198
01:03:44,375 --> 01:03:48,375
Might as well fill in the other six days
for some, you know, holiness too.
1199
01:03:48,375 --> 01:03:51,000
I'm actually going
to help these guys make challah.
1200
01:03:51,000 --> 01:03:54,458
- Challah!
- Okay, okay! Challah, challah.
1201
01:03:54,458 --> 01:03:56,291
- That's what I said!
1202
01:03:56,291 --> 01:03:58,791
I'm waiting here for Mrs. Lippman
to unlock the kitchen.
1203
01:03:58,791 --> 01:03:59,958
She's taking forever.
1204
01:03:59,958 --> 01:04:03,791
I remember when I had Mrs. Lippman,
six years old, not a care in the world.
1205
01:04:03,791 --> 01:04:04,708
I got cares.
1206
01:04:04,708 --> 01:04:07,750
My mom says
if I don't learn the candle blessings,
1207
01:04:07,750 --> 01:04:10,375
I can't play Call of Duty anymore!
1208
01:04:10,375 --> 01:04:11,541
Oh, that's heavy.
1209
01:04:11,541 --> 01:04:15,708
Or maybe Mr. Mateo will teach you.
He probably knows it by now.
1210
01:04:15,708 --> 01:04:18,416
Baruch Atah Adonai,
1211
01:04:18,416 --> 01:04:20,750
-Eloheinu Melech ha'o--
1212
01:04:21,666 --> 01:04:23,541
- Mrs. Lippman!
- Bye.
1213
01:04:23,541 --> 01:04:24,750
See you later, Stacy.
1214
01:04:29,291 --> 01:04:31,333
- Hi, Mike.
- Shalom, Stacy.
1215
01:04:45,041 --> 01:04:46,000
What's up?
1216
01:04:47,208 --> 01:04:48,041
Hi.
1217
01:04:48,583 --> 01:04:49,541
Hey, uh...
1218
01:04:50,541 --> 01:04:52,500
Have you ever kissed anyone?
1219
01:04:55,041 --> 01:04:56,833
Uh, no.
1220
01:04:58,416 --> 01:04:59,750
Would you want to?
1221
01:05:01,333 --> 01:05:02,208
Yeah.
1222
01:05:03,458 --> 01:05:05,083
All right, come on, let's go.
1223
01:05:07,750 --> 01:05:08,666
Come on.
1224
01:05:14,458 --> 01:05:16,583
- Um, someone's in here!
- Go away!
1225
01:05:17,541 --> 01:05:19,250
Where could we go?
1226
01:05:20,708 --> 01:05:21,958
Come on. Let's go.
1227
01:05:51,625 --> 01:05:53,666
No one's gonna find us in here.
1228
01:05:54,958 --> 01:05:58,125
I don't know,
I just feel like God's gonna be mad.
1229
01:05:59,500 --> 01:06:03,083
Nah, God's gonna be stoked
that we like each other so much.
1230
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:05,875
You're right.
1231
01:06:14,125 --> 01:06:16,958
This is not the bathroom!
1232
01:06:16,958 --> 01:06:18,000
Oh no.
1233
01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:19,458
Do you see a toilet?!
1234
01:06:19,458 --> 01:06:21,166
I didn't think so!
1235
01:06:21,833 --> 01:06:23,041
I didn't need to go.
1236
01:06:23,750 --> 01:06:25,958
Well, mazel tov, you guys are married now.
1237
01:06:26,916 --> 01:06:28,541
Kidding, but you're in a lot of trouble.
1238
01:06:29,250 --> 01:06:32,166
In front of the Torah?
What were you thinking?
1239
01:06:32,166 --> 01:06:35,083
I said I was sorry.
Why is Andy not getting in trouble?
1240
01:06:35,083 --> 01:06:36,166
Oh, he's in trouble!
1241
01:06:36,166 --> 01:06:39,125
He's a repeat offender. We're handling it.
1242
01:06:39,125 --> 01:06:40,583
I hope my father doesn't handle it.
1243
01:06:40,583 --> 01:06:43,125
He'll put him in a wood chipper.
They'll never find his body.
1244
01:06:44,541 --> 01:06:49,083
Seema, we're only a few weeks away
from your Bat Mitz. Okay, cutie-pops?
1245
01:06:49,083 --> 01:06:51,625
This is supposed to be
the most important day of your life,
1246
01:06:51,625 --> 01:06:54,416
and you're not taking it seriously at all.
1247
01:06:54,416 --> 01:06:56,375
You haven't even done
your mitzvah project yet.
1248
01:06:56,375 --> 01:06:59,125
I did my mitzvah project.
I volunteered at the retirement home.
1249
01:06:59,125 --> 01:07:02,583
So you could do a mitzvah,
or so you could flirt with a boy?
1250
01:07:03,458 --> 01:07:04,833
How did you know that?
1251
01:07:04,833 --> 01:07:08,750
Let's just say there's
a wonderful woman there, Mrs. O'Leary,
1252
01:07:08,750 --> 01:07:14,208
who wishes to convert to Judaism,
and you never brought her bookies!
1253
01:07:14,916 --> 01:07:17,833
Yeah, you're not the only one
who's amazing at impressions.
1254
01:07:18,333 --> 01:07:19,333
I'll do better.
1255
01:07:20,166 --> 01:07:24,000
Let me take off
my "rabbi hat" for a second
1256
01:07:24,000 --> 01:07:26,416
and put on my "tough love hat."
1257
01:07:28,500 --> 01:07:31,875
If you don't shape up, your Bat Mitzvah
is gonna be cancelled, sis.
1258
01:07:32,875 --> 01:07:36,208
And that's the way
the hamantaschen crumbles. Capisce?
1259
01:07:44,916 --> 01:07:47,375
Yes, we understand, Rabbi Rebecca.
1260
01:07:47,375 --> 01:07:49,833
She doesn't really even deserve
a second chance.
1261
01:07:49,833 --> 01:07:50,875
We thank you for that.
1262
01:07:50,875 --> 01:07:52,041
Mm-hmm.
1263
01:07:52,041 --> 01:07:56,125
Oh, and just please
calm your husband down.
1264
01:07:56,125 --> 01:08:00,458
Okay? Tell him don't put Andy Goldfarb
in a wood chipper.
1265
01:08:00,458 --> 01:08:03,125
- She just walked in.
- Oh. Okay, good luck.
1266
01:08:05,333 --> 01:08:08,375
Dad, take a breath.
Just talk to her. Don't yell.
1267
01:08:12,750 --> 01:08:14,125
He didn't take a breath.
1268
01:08:14,125 --> 01:08:15,166
No.
1269
01:08:19,666 --> 01:08:21,666
Hey. We don't slam doors in this house.
1270
01:08:21,666 --> 01:08:24,250
- Dad, I need a break.
- Well, welcome to being an adult.
1271
01:08:24,250 --> 01:08:26,333
And welcome to being Jewish.
We don't get breaks.
1272
01:08:26,333 --> 01:08:27,666
Oh my God! Stop!
1273
01:08:27,666 --> 01:08:29,583
Kissing a boy in a temple?
1274
01:08:29,583 --> 01:08:31,916
You know how disrespectful that is?
1275
01:08:31,916 --> 01:08:37,166
Every time you walk into that synagogue,
you are declaring to everyone and God,
1276
01:08:37,166 --> 01:08:39,916
"I'm Jewish, and I am part of this!"
1277
01:08:39,916 --> 01:08:41,291
Well, maybe I don't want to be!
1278
01:08:41,291 --> 01:08:42,458
Yes, you do!
1279
01:08:42,458 --> 01:08:44,083
I was born into God's kingdom!
1280
01:08:44,083 --> 01:08:47,125
Yeah? Well, God wants you out right now!
How's that?
1281
01:08:47,125 --> 01:08:49,291
- I hate you!
- You don't mean that.
1282
01:08:49,291 --> 01:08:51,916
Wow, I never said that to him,
and I was nuts.
1283
01:08:51,916 --> 01:08:53,583
- You hate me?!
1284
01:08:53,583 --> 01:08:56,375
I do. You're a jerk,
and you won't let me have a mojito bar.
1285
01:08:56,375 --> 01:08:57,291
Gabi!
1286
01:08:57,291 --> 01:08:58,208
Hi!
1287
01:08:58,208 --> 01:09:00,333
That's why we fought the Nazis?
1288
01:09:00,333 --> 01:09:02,041
So you could have a mojito bar?
1289
01:09:02,041 --> 01:09:03,416
Is this a bad time?
1290
01:09:03,416 --> 01:09:06,416
- Um, no. What's... what's going on?
- Are you nuts?
1291
01:09:06,416 --> 01:09:09,041
Well, Stacy was supposed
to do that video for Lydia's Bat Mitzvah.
1292
01:09:09,041 --> 01:09:10,500
Oh, yeah, yeah. Of course, right.
1293
01:09:10,500 --> 01:09:12,458
Get out of my room!
Stop ruining my life!
1294
01:09:12,458 --> 01:09:14,541
- Anyways--
- I paid for this room!
1295
01:09:14,541 --> 01:09:15,500
She never sent it.
1296
01:09:15,500 --> 01:09:18,500
I was in the neighborhood, and thought
I'd pop by and see if it was ready.
1297
01:09:18,500 --> 01:09:19,666
- Really?
1298
01:09:19,666 --> 01:09:22,500
Oh, hi, Ronnie. Hi, Zaara. How's it going?
1299
01:09:22,500 --> 01:09:24,791
Andy Goldfarb?
That's who you pick?
1300
01:09:24,791 --> 01:09:26,791
Great! Nice to see you.
1301
01:09:26,791 --> 01:09:28,833
You girls got so big. How's high school?
1302
01:09:28,833 --> 01:09:30,958
You'll be the reason
I start doing drugs!
1303
01:09:30,958 --> 01:09:32,166
Same here!
1304
01:09:32,166 --> 01:09:33,083
Hard.
1305
01:09:33,083 --> 01:09:34,541
Very, very stressful.
1306
01:09:34,541 --> 01:09:35,583
Good God!
1307
01:09:35,583 --> 01:09:39,291
Um, I think that Stacy said
she finished the video this weekend,
1308
01:09:39,291 --> 01:09:41,500
so I can just email it to you ASAP.
1309
01:09:41,500 --> 01:09:44,541
Thanks. Lydia keeps talking about how
she doesn't wanna have a video anymore.
1310
01:09:44,541 --> 01:09:46,666
- I know she'd regret it.
- You're on your own! Good luck!
1311
01:09:46,666 --> 01:09:48,083
I hope you die before Mom!
1312
01:09:48,083 --> 01:09:50,708
- I'm taking you with me!
- We'll see you. Mazel tov! Bye!
1313
01:10:07,750 --> 01:10:11,250
Andy Goldfarb
is going in the goddamn wood chipper!
1314
01:10:11,250 --> 01:10:12,791
- Okay.
1315
01:10:16,708 --> 01:10:18,250
Dear God, Stacy here.
1316
01:10:19,666 --> 01:10:23,875
So, as you probably already know,
Lydia's Bat Mitzvah is coming up,
1317
01:10:23,875 --> 01:10:26,041
and I really don't know what to do.
1318
01:10:26,583 --> 01:10:28,791
I'm not even sure if she wants me there.
1319
01:10:33,375 --> 01:10:35,666
If I was in
this situation a month ago,
1320
01:10:35,666 --> 01:10:37,708
I would've asked my friends what to do.
1321
01:10:38,583 --> 01:10:40,250
Hey, look, we're twinning.
1322
01:10:41,583 --> 01:10:42,583
Twinning?
1323
01:10:42,583 --> 01:10:44,375
What are we in fourth grade?
1324
01:10:45,083 --> 01:10:47,083
But the people
I'm hanging out with now,
1325
01:10:47,083 --> 01:10:49,375
I don't know
if they'd have such good advice.
1326
01:10:49,375 --> 01:10:52,083
et b'ney Moshe--
1327
01:10:52,083 --> 01:10:53,875
I've actually been working hard
1328
01:10:53,875 --> 01:10:56,875
because I want to have a good Bat Mitzvah
and a good life.
1329
01:10:57,375 --> 01:11:00,291
kedushah ha-nasi...
1330
01:11:00,291 --> 01:11:02,791
I don't know how to fix things with Lydia,
1331
01:11:02,791 --> 01:11:04,166
or if I should,
1332
01:11:04,166 --> 01:11:05,916
or if it's even possible.
1333
01:11:05,916 --> 01:11:10,500
al panav ad bo-oh l'dabeyr ito.
1334
01:11:10,500 --> 01:11:11,750
Booyah!
1335
01:11:12,291 --> 01:11:14,916
So I've been focusing
on my new mitzvah project.
1336
01:11:14,916 --> 01:11:16,208
♪ 'Cause now I'm in it ♪
1337
01:11:16,791 --> 01:11:18,375
♪ But I've been trying... ♪
1338
01:11:18,375 --> 01:11:20,750
{\an8} And maybe,
if I start doing good things...
1339
01:11:20,750 --> 01:11:21,666
I got you.
1340
01:11:21,666 --> 01:11:23,583
...good things will start happening to me.
1341
01:11:29,666 --> 01:11:30,708
Thanks.
1342
01:11:31,500 --> 01:11:34,083
That's more of
a Buddhist concept than a Jewish one,
1343
01:11:34,083 --> 01:11:35,666
but, hey, at this point, I'm--
1344
01:11:35,666 --> 01:11:36,791
Friedman?
1345
01:11:37,625 --> 01:11:39,208
What the hell are you doing?
1346
01:11:39,208 --> 01:11:41,000
Your meter was expired.
1347
01:11:41,000 --> 01:11:42,958
Yes, I wanted it to be expired.
1348
01:11:42,958 --> 01:11:44,916
The meter maid is a sexual icon,
1349
01:11:44,916 --> 01:11:47,083
and I wanted a chance to hit on her.
1350
01:11:47,083 --> 01:11:49,666
Now I have to wait 45 minutes!
1351
01:11:49,666 --> 01:11:51,500
You're not supposed
to call them meter maids.
1352
01:11:51,500 --> 01:11:53,291
And why are you in a handicapped spot?
1353
01:11:53,875 --> 01:11:55,375
Everybody loves a bad boy.
1354
01:11:56,166 --> 01:11:58,166
Gross. That's a $500 fine.
1355
01:11:58,166 --> 01:11:59,333
Huh?
1356
01:12:15,333 --> 01:12:16,291
What the heck, man?
1357
01:12:16,958 --> 01:12:18,125
It was her fault!
1358
01:12:18,833 --> 01:12:20,625
- Her?
- She did it!
1359
01:12:20,625 --> 01:12:22,041
- We know that kid.
- What?
1360
01:12:22,041 --> 01:12:24,958
- She goes out with the basketball guy.
- Exactly.
1361
01:12:37,833 --> 01:12:39,166
Stace?
1362
01:12:40,708 --> 01:12:41,791
Honey?
1363
01:12:43,333 --> 01:12:44,750
Why aren't you ready yet?
1364
01:12:45,708 --> 01:12:47,333
I don't want to go.
1365
01:12:47,333 --> 01:12:48,875
Yes, you do.
1366
01:12:48,875 --> 01:12:51,333
This is Lydia's Bat Mitzvah.
1367
01:12:52,250 --> 01:12:54,666
- She doesn't even want me there.
- Honey.
1368
01:12:54,666 --> 01:12:57,125
I don't know what's happening
between you two,
1369
01:12:57,125 --> 01:13:00,250
but I know things must feel
really messed up right now.
1370
01:13:00,250 --> 01:13:04,291
I know she hurt you,
but I'm sure she misses her best friend.
1371
01:13:06,583 --> 01:13:08,541
You need to make things right.
1372
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:13,458
- Okay?
- Yeah.
1373
01:13:13,458 --> 01:13:15,916
Okay,
I think you should wear this towel.
1374
01:13:15,916 --> 01:13:18,125
- It's a good accessory.
- It's very stylish.
1375
01:13:18,125 --> 01:13:19,458
- Don't you think?
- Yeah.
1376
01:13:24,666 --> 01:13:27,666
Oy! Hey! Hey, slow down!
1377
01:13:27,666 --> 01:13:29,916
- Feel the breeze, Grandma!
- Oh my, ah!
1378
01:13:29,916 --> 01:13:32,333
I can see why you fell for him so hard.
1379
01:13:35,625 --> 01:13:37,208
You’re wearin' the suit
for me, huh?
1380
01:13:37,208 --> 01:13:39,916
- Yeah. Lydia gets the suit.
- Oh, it's for Lydia.
1381
01:13:50,916 --> 01:13:52,541
- We love you guys!
- Thank you for coming.
1382
01:13:52,541 --> 01:13:54,000
Lydia! Look at you!
1383
01:13:54,000 --> 01:13:55,375
Oh my God!
1384
01:13:55,375 --> 01:13:56,875
- This is exquisite!
1385
01:13:57,500 --> 01:14:00,750
Gabi, you've outdone yourself, girl.
Really, it's gorgeous.
1386
01:14:00,750 --> 01:14:02,541
Stacy, I'm so glad you came!
1387
01:14:02,541 --> 01:14:04,833
Lydia said you've been so busy
with show choir.
1388
01:14:05,791 --> 01:14:07,291
Yeah, the show's going really great.
1389
01:14:07,291 --> 01:14:08,625
That's exciting.
1390
01:14:08,625 --> 01:14:09,708
Can you girls believe it?
1391
01:14:09,708 --> 01:14:12,500
You've been planning this
your whole lives, and it's finally here!
1392
01:14:12,500 --> 01:14:15,833
Uh, well, it's time to get hammered.
1393
01:14:15,833 --> 01:14:16,791
Okay.
1394
01:14:16,791 --> 01:14:18,541
Ooh, maybe he'll pass out.
1395
01:14:18,541 --> 01:14:21,541
You! I saw you today at temple.
The Haftarah.
1396
01:14:21,541 --> 01:14:22,833
Spot on.
1397
01:14:22,833 --> 01:14:25,458
- Thank you, Mr. Friedman.
- Lydia, you look so pretty!
1398
01:14:25,458 --> 01:14:26,583
Well, thank you.
1399
01:14:26,583 --> 01:14:30,333
- You got the Twizzlers station?
- Yeah, it's back there. I got it for you.
1400
01:14:30,333 --> 01:14:32,083
Yay!
1401
01:14:32,083 --> 01:14:35,000
Your New York theme
is gonna be amazing!
1402
01:14:35,000 --> 01:14:37,083
Thank you for coming, madam.
1403
01:14:37,083 --> 01:14:39,291
Well,
thank you for inviting me.
1404
01:14:39,291 --> 01:14:41,000
Lyd! There you are!
1405
01:14:41,000 --> 01:14:42,583
- Hey!
- You're up! Come on!
1406
01:14:42,583 --> 01:14:43,833
Ready for your grand entrance?
1407
01:14:44,750 --> 01:14:46,666
Come on! Places, cutie-pops.
1408
01:14:48,000 --> 01:14:49,666
- See you after.
- That's a good impression.
1409
01:14:49,666 --> 01:14:50,833
See you. Bye, Ronnie!
1410
01:14:50,833 --> 01:14:53,041
- That felt good, huh?
- Yeah.
1411
01:14:54,500 --> 01:14:55,375
- Wow!
- Wow!
1412
01:14:57,250 --> 01:14:58,875
- Hey!
- Oh, hey!
1413
01:14:58,875 --> 01:15:01,250
We're sitting with the Lamonsoffs.
I love it!
1414
01:15:01,250 --> 01:15:02,375
Good to see ya.
1415
01:15:05,125 --> 01:15:06,166
What up?
1416
01:15:06,708 --> 01:15:09,166
You ready, DJ? The party's starting.
1417
01:15:09,166 --> 01:15:13,000
All right, I'll be right there!
I'm just getting my mind right!
1418
01:15:17,958 --> 01:15:19,541
It's Schmuley time.
1419
01:15:21,500 --> 01:15:22,583
So let's go.
1420
01:15:24,291 --> 01:15:29,125
All right! Put your hands up in the air
like you just don't care, because...
1421
01:15:29,125 --> 01:15:34,166
It is officially
Lydia Katz Rodriguez's Bat Mitzvah!
1422
01:15:36,541 --> 01:15:39,541
Woo!
Oh yeah, you got it, Grandma!
1423
01:15:44,833 --> 01:15:47,750
Yeah, nobody does it
like DJ Schmuley, huh?
1424
01:15:47,750 --> 01:15:48,833
I guess.
1425
01:16:00,625 --> 01:16:03,000
My little sweet baby.
1426
01:16:05,833 --> 01:16:06,958
Bubelah!
1427
01:16:06,958 --> 01:16:07,916
Tatelah!
1428
01:16:07,916 --> 01:16:09,000
Meydelah!
1429
01:16:09,000 --> 01:16:11,416
Shayna punim!
1430
01:16:16,958 --> 01:16:19,791
- Remember that? Kindergarten, first day?
- Yeah, yeah.
1431
01:16:19,791 --> 01:16:21,458
Yeah, you took my parking spot.
1432
01:16:21,958 --> 01:16:24,208
Mm-hmm.
Not sure that was me, but either way.
1433
01:16:24,208 --> 01:16:25,291
Okay.
1434
01:16:28,375 --> 01:16:30,416
If that was you and a boy,
what would you do?
1435
01:16:41,708 --> 01:16:43,750
We're waiting for her
to pop a pimple.
1436
01:16:43,750 --> 01:16:45,750
Stace, what's going on?
What are you doing?
1437
01:16:48,833 --> 01:16:49,750
Look at that.
1438
01:16:50,875 --> 01:16:52,416
Why do you always do that?
1439
01:16:52,416 --> 01:16:54,416
Because I like the way my feet smell!
1440
01:16:54,416 --> 01:16:55,958
This isn't normal!
1441
01:16:57,666 --> 01:16:59,750
Schmuley, turn off the video.
Please, please, please!
1442
01:16:59,750 --> 01:17:02,708
Schmuley! Turn off the video!
1443
01:17:02,708 --> 01:17:04,750
It's getting big reactions.
What's wrong with it?
1444
01:17:04,750 --> 01:17:08,083
It's getting a horrible reaction!
Please, just turn it off!
1445
01:17:08,083 --> 01:17:10,208
- She sounds like a lawnmower.
1446
01:17:11,750 --> 01:17:13,208
That was not a snore!
1447
01:17:14,750 --> 01:17:16,666
- What's that smell?
- Oh God.
1448
01:17:16,666 --> 01:17:18,958
Kym and Megan and Anya, they suck.
1449
01:17:18,958 --> 01:17:20,333
They're horrible.
1450
01:17:20,333 --> 01:17:24,291
Oh, I want cute, designer stuff,
but make sure it's, like, eco-friendly.
1451
01:17:24,291 --> 01:17:26,000
- I'm sorry.
- They're very dumb.
1452
01:17:26,000 --> 01:17:27,166
It's kinda true though.
1453
01:17:27,166 --> 01:17:29,125
Shut up! It's not.
1454
01:17:29,125 --> 01:17:31,458
- I got a full booger.
- Stop! Erase that right now. Please!
1455
01:17:32,666 --> 01:17:34,250
Her real toes are hairy.
1456
01:17:34,250 --> 01:17:36,750
Remember when that string
on my tampon broke?
1457
01:17:36,750 --> 01:17:38,125
I think I peed myself!
1458
01:17:38,125 --> 01:17:39,666
Oh my God.
1459
01:17:39,666 --> 01:17:42,291
Have you ever farted from the front?
1460
01:17:42,291 --> 01:17:43,833
Yeah, like your vajayjay?
1461
01:17:43,833 --> 01:17:45,541
- Want me to show you?
- Yes.
1462
01:17:45,541 --> 01:17:46,833
I have to prepare.
1463
01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:51,708
I was showing them how to queef.
1464
01:17:51,708 --> 01:17:54,041
Is that
what kids talk about today?
1465
01:17:54,041 --> 01:17:56,291
Tampons and frontal farts?
1466
01:17:56,291 --> 01:17:58,041
You better not show this to anyone.
1467
01:17:58,041 --> 01:17:59,041
Oh my God.
1468
01:17:59,041 --> 01:18:01,166
I swear to God,
if you show this to anyone...
1469
01:18:01,166 --> 01:18:03,416
- Schmuley did this?
- I... I--
1470
01:18:03,416 --> 01:18:04,458
Schmuley?
1471
01:18:04,458 --> 01:18:08,958
Thanks for watching, bye!
1472
01:18:12,583 --> 01:18:14,208
- Why would Stacy do that?
- I don't know.
1473
01:18:19,208 --> 01:18:20,625
Okay, even I'm not that mean.
1474
01:18:20,625 --> 01:18:22,583
- You're pretty mean.
- Yeah, you suck.
1475
01:18:39,416 --> 01:18:40,833
Turn it off, turn it off!
1476
01:18:40,833 --> 01:18:43,291
Lydia! Lydia, I didn't mean to--
1477
01:18:43,291 --> 01:18:45,666
Stop! You didn't mean to?
1478
01:18:45,666 --> 01:18:48,458
Like you didn't mean to tell everyone
I had a black hair on my nipple,
1479
01:18:48,458 --> 01:18:49,791
or that Andy was my first kiss?
1480
01:18:49,791 --> 01:18:52,208
- No, but this is different!
- Just stop lying, Stacy!
1481
01:18:52,208 --> 01:18:54,916
I have tried to apologize,
but you keep punishing me!
1482
01:18:54,916 --> 01:18:57,375
- When is it enough, Stacy?
- Now, it's enough!
1483
01:18:57,375 --> 01:18:58,375
It's too late!
1484
01:18:58,875 --> 01:18:59,833
Lydia!
1485
01:19:03,958 --> 01:19:07,750
♪ I saw us only in the highlights ♪
1486
01:19:12,500 --> 01:19:15,916
♪ A picture of me... ♪
1487
01:19:15,916 --> 01:19:18,250
I should go up and see her.
I gotta talk to her.
1488
01:19:18,250 --> 01:19:20,750
No, I'm the one who sent the damn video.
I should go.
1489
01:19:20,750 --> 01:19:24,000
Neither of you guys should go up there.
She needs to process this herself.
1490
01:19:24,000 --> 01:19:25,000
No, honey, she needs--
1491
01:19:25,000 --> 01:19:27,166
I know what she needs
'cause I know how she's feeling.
1492
01:19:27,166 --> 01:19:28,625
How would you know what she's feeling?
1493
01:19:28,625 --> 01:19:31,291
Even your crazy ass
never did anything that stupid.
1494
01:19:31,291 --> 01:19:33,625
True, but I've seen some similar TikToks.
1495
01:19:33,625 --> 01:19:36,541
And the "even your crazy ass"
was gaslighting.
1496
01:19:37,416 --> 01:19:38,875
Yeah, you're right. Sorry about that.
1497
01:19:38,875 --> 01:19:41,291
This is gonna be difficult
for you to hear, Danny and Bree,
1498
01:19:41,291 --> 01:19:42,791
but from this point forward,
1499
01:19:42,791 --> 01:19:46,875
there's going to be a whole huge part
of Stacy that you don't understand,
1500
01:19:46,875 --> 01:19:49,875
that you won't ever understand,
no matter how much you want to,
1501
01:19:49,875 --> 01:19:51,208
and that's just the way it is.
1502
01:19:52,291 --> 01:19:54,833
Don't ever call us Danny
and Bree again, Zaara.
1503
01:19:54,833 --> 01:19:56,041
Yeah, that was weird.
1504
01:19:56,041 --> 01:19:58,375
Sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Friedman.
1505
01:19:59,750 --> 01:20:01,458
To me, that was gaslighting.
1506
01:20:04,958 --> 01:20:09,291
God, everything is such a mess.
1507
01:20:10,541 --> 01:20:12,583
I've never felt this way before.
1508
01:20:15,458 --> 01:20:18,208
And I don't know how to fix it.
1509
01:20:21,500 --> 01:20:25,291
♪ When you said it was love
Did you mean it? ♪
1510
01:20:25,791 --> 01:20:29,875
♪ Or did I make it up? Did I dream it? ♪
1511
01:20:29,875 --> 01:20:33,875
♪ For a while I was fooled
I believed it ♪
1512
01:20:34,375 --> 01:20:38,166
♪ But you can hang the moon ♪
1513
01:20:42,666 --> 01:20:45,208
♪ But you can hang the moon ♪
1514
01:20:45,208 --> 01:20:49,083
Well, I'm sure you got
this day marked in your holy calendar too,
1515
01:20:49,083 --> 01:20:51,250
but today is my Bat Mitzvah.
1516
01:20:51,250 --> 01:20:54,083
The most important day of my Jewish life.
1517
01:20:54,083 --> 01:20:56,333
Maybe even my entire life.
1518
01:20:56,916 --> 01:20:58,458
But what's the point?
1519
01:20:58,458 --> 01:20:59,791
Let's do this!
1520
01:21:02,375 --> 01:21:04,125
You're kidding me. Again?
1521
01:21:04,125 --> 01:21:06,375
This time, I'm serious. I am not going.
1522
01:21:06,375 --> 01:21:08,708
Oh, you're going.
Get dressed. Get in the car.
1523
01:21:08,708 --> 01:21:10,583
- I can't, and I won't.
1524
01:21:10,583 --> 01:21:13,500
Okay, fine. Say goodbye to your phone.
1525
01:21:15,250 --> 01:21:17,125
Fine. Who am I texting anyway?
1526
01:21:20,625 --> 01:21:24,208
There is nothing you can say or do
that will make me go.
1527
01:21:24,875 --> 01:21:27,541
I'm an adult today,
and I can make my own decisions,
1528
01:21:27,541 --> 01:21:30,166
and I have decided that I am staying here.
1529
01:21:31,458 --> 01:21:34,125
- Put me down, put me down!
- Hey. Come on. Hey.
1530
01:21:34,125 --> 01:21:36,333
Ronnie!
1531
01:21:36,333 --> 01:21:39,125
That is some amazing parenting
right there.
1532
01:21:39,125 --> 01:21:41,416
- No! Don't!
- Hey.
1533
01:21:46,416 --> 01:21:48,375
Hey, how are those armpits doing?
1534
01:21:48,375 --> 01:21:50,458
You know how they say
that it grows back double?
1535
01:21:50,458 --> 01:21:51,750
It's growing back triple.
1536
01:21:51,750 --> 01:21:52,708
Oh.
1537
01:21:52,708 --> 01:21:53,708
Yeah.
1538
01:21:53,708 --> 01:21:55,333
- Pull it together!
1539
01:21:58,333 --> 01:22:00,458
- Calm down.
- I don't want to go.
1540
01:22:00,458 --> 01:22:01,583
Can you stop?
1541
01:22:02,500 --> 01:22:03,625
H-hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
1542
01:22:03,625 --> 01:22:05,791
Shabbat shalom.
1543
01:22:05,791 --> 01:22:07,666
Shabbat shalom.
1544
01:22:07,666 --> 01:22:10,791
Today is a very special day.
1545
01:22:11,291 --> 01:22:13,958
Our brilliant, young Stacy Friedman
1546
01:22:13,958 --> 01:22:17,541
is called to the bimah
for her Bat Mitzvah.
1547
01:22:17,541 --> 01:22:18,875
Oh, God.
1548
01:22:18,875 --> 01:22:22,541
Do you hear her calling me up
to receive an honor I do not deserve?
1549
01:22:23,250 --> 01:22:27,166
I've been dreaming about this day
my whole life, and now it's here.
1550
01:22:27,166 --> 01:22:31,375
And I wish I could go back in bed,
or under my bed, or literally anywhere--
1551
01:22:31,375 --> 01:22:32,458
Seema?
1552
01:22:57,375 --> 01:23:00,333
Barechu et Adonai hamevorach.
1553
01:23:00,333 --> 01:23:05,000
Baruch Adonai
hamevorach leolam vaed.
1554
01:23:05,000 --> 01:23:08,000
Baruch Adonai hamevorach leolam vaed.
1555
01:23:08,000 --> 01:23:12,541
Baruch Atah Adonai Eloheinu
melech haolam,
1556
01:23:12,541 --> 01:23:15,666
asher bachar banu mikol...
1557
01:23:15,666 --> 01:23:17,208
ha-amim...
1558
01:23:25,708 --> 01:23:28,333
I made a huge mistake.
1559
01:23:29,541 --> 01:23:32,166
I'm sorry.
I don't even know what I'm doing up here.
1560
01:23:41,000 --> 01:23:41,833
Uh...
1561
01:23:43,458 --> 01:23:47,500
In the Jewish religion,
I am supposed to be a grown-up today.
1562
01:23:48,791 --> 01:23:54,916
But I have been so selfish and bratty
and annoying to my parents who just want...
1563
01:23:54,916 --> 01:23:56,958
And then, it happened.
1564
01:23:56,958 --> 01:23:59,666
The very day I was supposed
to become a woman
1565
01:23:59,666 --> 01:24:01,708
is the day that everything started
to make sense.
1566
01:24:01,708 --> 01:24:03,166
...Nikki, Tara...
1567
01:24:03,166 --> 01:24:06,416
When you're a kid, you think it's okay
to put yourself in front of your friends
1568
01:24:06,416 --> 01:24:08,291
in pursuit of something better.
1569
01:24:08,916 --> 01:24:11,750
A woman knows there is nothing better
than your friends.
1570
01:24:13,250 --> 01:24:14,541
...Kym, Megan, Anya...
1571
01:24:14,541 --> 01:24:15,708
When you're a kid,
1572
01:24:15,708 --> 01:24:19,166
sometimes you think you have to be
someone you're not in order to fit in.
1573
01:24:19,166 --> 01:24:22,791
...if I'm being honest, it's probably 'cause
we were, like, jealous or something...
1574
01:24:22,791 --> 01:24:25,375
But a woman knows
it's not about hiding who you are.
1575
01:24:25,375 --> 01:24:27,375
It's about being yourself
and speaking your truth.
1576
01:24:27,375 --> 01:24:30,750
...but also, you guys can be,
like, such a-holes sometimes.
1577
01:24:32,041 --> 01:24:33,625
Keep it PG in the temple.
1578
01:24:33,625 --> 01:24:34,750
Sorry.
1579
01:24:34,750 --> 01:24:37,166
Where'd she learn to curse like that?
1580
01:24:37,166 --> 01:24:38,291
No idea.
1581
01:24:38,291 --> 01:24:41,500
And the biggest difference
between being a kid and an adult...
1582
01:24:41,500 --> 01:24:42,625
Andy...
1583
01:24:43,458 --> 01:24:45,416
...is knowing what really matters.
1584
01:24:46,000 --> 01:24:49,333
I'm gonna keep it brief 'cause I know you
can't focus on one thing for that long,
1585
01:24:49,333 --> 01:24:52,500
but you're basic and not nice to people,
1586
01:24:52,500 --> 01:24:55,083
and if I'm being honest,
not that good at soccer.
1587
01:24:56,458 --> 01:24:57,541
You suck!
1588
01:24:58,500 --> 01:25:00,541
And worst of all, because of you,
1589
01:25:01,250 --> 01:25:04,708
I ruined my friendship
with the one person that matters the most.
1590
01:25:05,625 --> 01:25:07,375
I need to tell her how bad I messed up.
1591
01:25:08,583 --> 01:25:09,625
Hey, hey, hey...
1592
01:25:09,625 --> 01:25:12,125
You gotta go up there and finish
your Torah portion before you go.
1593
01:25:12,125 --> 01:25:16,000
Come here. Give it your best shot,
and then we'll all fix this together.
1594
01:25:16,000 --> 01:25:18,208
Hopefully, after I take off
this itchy suit.
1595
01:25:19,750 --> 01:25:21,000
You have coffee breath.
1596
01:25:21,000 --> 01:25:24,000
Okay. All right. Use that up there. Go.
1597
01:25:24,000 --> 01:25:28,583
Quickly, so quickly, so quickly.
1598
01:25:28,583 --> 01:25:30,291
So quickly.
1599
01:25:36,666 --> 01:25:40,708
Va-y'chal Moshe mi-dabeyr itam
1600
01:25:40,708 --> 01:25:42,791
Va-yiteyn al panav masveh.
1601
01:25:44,083 --> 01:25:48,541
Uv'vo Moshe lifney Adonai l'dabeyr ito
1602
01:25:48,541 --> 01:25:51,000
Ya-sir et ha-masveh ad tzeyto
1603
01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:57,708
V'yatza v'di-ber el b'ney Yisrael
et asher y'tzuveh.
1604
01:25:57,708 --> 01:26:02,083
V'ra-u v'ney Yisrael et p'ney Moshe
1605
01:26:02,083 --> 01:26:08,458
Ki karan or p'ney Moshe v'heysheev Moshe
1606
01:26:08,458 --> 01:26:11,291
Et ha-masveh al panav
1607
01:26:11,291 --> 01:26:16,500
ad bo-oh l'dabeyr ito.
1608
01:26:17,958 --> 01:26:18,833
I did it.
1609
01:26:21,541 --> 01:26:23,500
Ya'sher koach! Now go!
1610
01:27:11,958 --> 01:27:13,041
Lydia!
1611
01:27:15,125 --> 01:27:16,958
Lydia.
1612
01:27:18,958 --> 01:27:19,875
Lydia.
1613
01:27:20,625 --> 01:27:22,000
Lydia, please open--
1614
01:27:23,750 --> 01:27:24,791
The Andy stuff.
1615
01:27:25,291 --> 01:27:27,416
I know you never hurt me on purpose.
1616
01:27:27,416 --> 01:27:29,541
I should have let you apologize.
1617
01:27:30,250 --> 01:27:33,541
I miss you, and I love you, and I'm sorry.
1618
01:27:33,541 --> 01:27:35,500
I've been a horrible, selfish friend.
1619
01:27:35,500 --> 01:27:37,375
Please, please forgive me.
1620
01:27:40,375 --> 01:27:43,250
Stacy, you ruined my Bat Mitzvah.
1621
01:27:43,250 --> 01:27:45,875
What part of that do you not understand?
I don't under-- Like--
1622
01:27:45,875 --> 01:27:48,000
- I know.
- Let me finish.
1623
01:27:48,583 --> 01:27:50,875
That day at the ledge,
I told you not to go.
1624
01:27:50,875 --> 01:27:52,958
I told you don't jump. You jumped.
1625
01:27:52,958 --> 01:27:54,750
Then the whole thing
ended up being my fault.
1626
01:27:54,750 --> 01:27:56,875
- Then I was the shitty friend?
- I'm sorry.
1627
01:27:56,875 --> 01:28:00,583
And I've known you liked Andy for, like,
a million years, but guess what, Stacy?
1628
01:28:00,583 --> 01:28:03,333
So has every other girl at our school,
including me,
1629
01:28:03,333 --> 01:28:06,458
but I never told you anything
because I knew it'd just make you upset.
1630
01:28:06,458 --> 01:28:11,250
And then, when you uninvited me to the day
I've been helping you plan forever,
1631
01:28:12,500 --> 01:28:14,208
I dated him to make you mad.
1632
01:28:14,916 --> 01:28:16,125
Until you ruined it.
1633
01:28:16,916 --> 01:28:19,166
Then you ruined your best friend's
most important day of her life.
1634
01:28:19,166 --> 01:28:20,958
So, yeah, I'm... I'm done here, Stacy.
1635
01:28:20,958 --> 01:28:22,708
Wait, you're right.
1636
01:28:23,458 --> 01:28:25,000
Yeah, I know.
1637
01:28:25,000 --> 01:28:29,500
Just come to my Bat Mitzvah party tonight.
I promise it'll be worth it. Please.
1638
01:28:34,875 --> 01:28:36,541
I'm gonna take that as a maybe.
1639
01:28:41,416 --> 01:28:42,375
Hello, again.
1640
01:28:48,500 --> 01:28:49,583
Honey?
1641
01:28:50,500 --> 01:28:51,416
Hi, Mom.
1642
01:28:51,416 --> 01:28:53,333
Your father called in
a lot of favors.
1643
01:28:53,333 --> 01:28:56,083
I think it's gonna work out
if she shows up.
1644
01:28:58,291 --> 01:28:59,458
Come on. Let me do it.
1645
01:29:04,250 --> 01:29:07,625
I know tonight's not exactly
what you dreamed it would be,
1646
01:29:07,625 --> 01:29:09,166
but I'm really proud of you.
1647
01:29:10,041 --> 01:29:10,875
Okay, go.
1648
01:29:13,750 --> 01:29:14,625
There.
1649
01:29:16,125 --> 01:29:17,833
- Hmm.
- Gorgeous.
1650
01:29:17,833 --> 01:29:18,916
Thanks, doll.
1651
01:29:21,750 --> 01:29:23,666
- I have something for you.
- Okay.
1652
01:29:26,166 --> 01:29:29,291
Okay, now,
I know you may not like this, but...
1653
01:29:30,708 --> 01:29:32,875
Really?
1654
01:29:33,458 --> 01:29:34,458
Thank you!
1655
01:29:37,041 --> 01:29:39,000
I think I'm gonna wear sneakers.
1656
01:29:39,000 --> 01:29:41,541
Oh my God, you're a woman.
You're a smart woman
1657
01:29:42,166 --> 01:29:43,375
Let's party!
1658
01:29:53,750 --> 01:29:54,750
Is she here?
1659
01:29:55,625 --> 01:29:57,625
I don't think she's coming.
1660
01:29:57,625 --> 01:29:58,791
Honey, she's gonna come.
1661
01:29:58,791 --> 01:30:00,750
May I have your attention?
1662
01:30:00,750 --> 01:30:03,500
It's starting. What if she doesn't come?
Then everything's pointless.
1663
01:30:05,500 --> 01:30:06,750
It's not pointless.
1664
01:30:06,750 --> 01:30:09,916
- I could've been working on my golf game!
- Oh, you're fine.
1665
01:30:09,916 --> 01:30:11,000
You made it.
1666
01:30:12,333 --> 01:30:13,250
I made it.
1667
01:30:13,916 --> 01:30:15,083
Perfect timing.
1668
01:30:15,083 --> 01:30:17,250
Just in time for your grand entrance.
1669
01:30:17,250 --> 01:30:20,000
Listen guys and girls,
ladies and gentlemen...
1670
01:30:20,000 --> 01:30:21,291
No, Lydia...
1671
01:30:21,291 --> 01:30:25,833
Please give a very sweet welcome
to your Bat Mitzvah
1672
01:30:27,250 --> 01:30:30,375
Lydia Rodriguez Katz!
1673
01:30:30,375 --> 01:30:31,875
It's time for yours.
1674
01:30:32,833 --> 01:30:34,583
Stacy, what is this?
1675
01:30:35,083 --> 01:30:38,208
You deserve a perfect Bat Mitzvah.
One that no one ruins.
1676
01:30:38,958 --> 01:30:41,125
So you gave up your Bat Mitzvah for me?
1677
01:30:43,375 --> 01:30:44,916
Stacy, this was your dream.
1678
01:30:44,916 --> 01:30:46,291
It's our dream.
1679
01:30:46,291 --> 01:30:47,291
Stacy!
1680
01:30:48,583 --> 01:30:51,500
Yeah, Lydia! We love you!
1681
01:30:51,500 --> 01:30:52,916
We love you!
1682
01:30:55,375 --> 01:30:56,458
Go!
1683
01:30:56,458 --> 01:30:57,916
Okay.
1684
01:30:57,916 --> 01:30:59,666
Entrance. Beautiful.
1685
01:31:01,916 --> 01:31:04,291
Lydia! Lydia! Lydia!
1686
01:31:04,291 --> 01:31:05,958
Lydia!
1687
01:31:05,958 --> 01:31:08,083
Come on, Lydia!
1688
01:31:10,416 --> 01:31:11,583
Go, Lydia!
1689
01:31:28,375 --> 01:31:32,958
All right! Make some noise
for Lydia and Stacy!
1690
01:31:34,958 --> 01:31:38,041
- I'm not paying for this, right?
- Yeah. You are.
1691
01:31:38,041 --> 01:31:40,625
I'm kidding you. You're good. We got this.
1692
01:31:40,625 --> 01:31:45,541
- Let's get this party started!
- Oh man.
1693
01:31:49,416 --> 01:31:51,125
♪ It's your birthday every day ♪
1694
01:31:53,250 --> 01:31:54,625
♪ Every day your birthday ♪
1695
01:31:54,625 --> 01:31:57,416
♪ We gon' have a good time, all right ♪
1696
01:32:03,166 --> 01:32:06,416
Guys, you're watching
Shawshank Redemp!
1697
01:32:06,416 --> 01:32:09,291
- I love that movie. Have you seen--
- Yeah, we've seen it.
1698
01:32:09,291 --> 01:32:12,250
- Yeah, can you leave us alone?
- Bye!
1699
01:32:18,708 --> 01:32:20,333
You're the guy
from the movie theater, right?
1700
01:32:20,333 --> 01:32:21,416
I am.
1701
01:32:21,416 --> 01:32:23,041
Let me get some Twizzlers.
1702
01:32:23,541 --> 01:32:25,208
- Yeah, give me a lot.
- On it.
1703
01:32:29,875 --> 01:32:31,750
- I just want one.
- Okay, my bad.
1704
01:32:31,750 --> 01:32:33,083
Hell's wrong with you?
1705
01:32:35,666 --> 01:32:38,416
All right, mishpachalah!
1706
01:32:38,416 --> 01:32:41,791
Who's ready
for some "Don't Stop Believing!"?
1707
01:32:41,791 --> 01:32:43,666
Yeah, let's go!
1708
01:32:45,375 --> 01:32:48,666
Of course you are, nerd,
and that's why I'm not going to play it.
1709
01:32:49,250 --> 01:32:52,541
I think it's time to slow things down
1710
01:32:52,541 --> 01:32:56,791
for a little love jam.
1711
01:32:59,166 --> 01:33:03,291
♪ Know it sounds funny
But I just can't stand the pain ♪
1712
01:33:06,916 --> 01:33:11,250
♪ Girl, I'm leaving you tomorrow ♪
1713
01:33:13,625 --> 01:33:17,875
♪ Seems to me, girl
You know I've done all I can ♪
1714
01:33:21,208 --> 01:33:25,416
♪ You see, I begged, stole
And I borrowed ♪
1715
01:33:26,250 --> 01:33:28,708
♪ That's why I'm easy ♪
1716
01:33:32,583 --> 01:33:35,250
♪ I'm easy like Sunday morning ♪
1717
01:33:35,250 --> 01:33:36,250
Hey.
1718
01:33:36,833 --> 01:33:38,250
Do you want to dance?
1719
01:33:39,166 --> 01:33:40,875
Well, what about Isabella?
1720
01:33:41,875 --> 01:33:42,791
Who?
1721
01:33:43,458 --> 01:33:45,500
Your 25-year-old girlfriend back
in Ecuador?
1722
01:33:45,500 --> 01:33:48,916
I just assumed her name
was something glamorous like Isabella.
1723
01:33:48,916 --> 01:33:50,625
I don't have a girlfriend.
1724
01:33:50,625 --> 01:33:53,375
You know, it's a weird rumor
I don't understand.
1725
01:33:54,791 --> 01:33:55,625
Oh.
1726
01:33:59,041 --> 01:34:01,250
Ooh, how do you feel about that?
1727
01:34:01,250 --> 01:34:03,791
Your daughter's dancing
with a handsome young gentleman?
1728
01:34:03,791 --> 01:34:06,708
Um, surprisingly, I feel okay with it.
1729
01:34:06,708 --> 01:34:07,666
Really?
1730
01:34:07,666 --> 01:34:10,333
- You know what I don't feel good with?
- What?
1731
01:34:10,916 --> 01:34:13,208
- Rabbi Rebecca and Cantor Jerry.
1732
01:34:13,208 --> 01:34:14,125
What is that?
1733
01:34:14,125 --> 01:34:16,041
Ooh, work it, Rabbi.
1734
01:34:16,041 --> 01:34:19,208
Yeah. That should be against
every religion right there.
1735
01:34:19,208 --> 01:34:21,208
- Yeah.
- What are they doing?
1736
01:34:24,500 --> 01:34:26,833
{\an8}Okay, that's enough of the slow stuff.
1737
01:34:26,833 --> 01:34:30,208
- Let's make some noise everybody!
1738
01:34:30,208 --> 01:34:31,541
Are you ready?
1739
01:34:36,791 --> 01:34:38,000
♪ Funky ♪
1740
01:34:39,291 --> 01:34:42,916
♪ Everybody clap your hands ♪
1741
01:34:45,166 --> 01:34:48,166
Dear God, Stacy Friedman here.
1742
01:34:48,875 --> 01:34:50,541
So today, I'm an adult,
1743
01:34:51,041 --> 01:34:53,125
and honestly, it's wonderful.
1744
01:34:54,416 --> 01:34:57,166
I know this is just the first chapter
of my grown-up life,
1745
01:34:57,166 --> 01:34:59,583
and it might not always be this great,
1746
01:34:59,583 --> 01:35:02,000
but if it was, that would also be great.
1747
01:35:02,500 --> 01:35:04,000
I mean, no pressure.
1748
01:35:04,000 --> 01:35:05,875
Not like I could pressure you.
1749
01:35:06,708 --> 01:35:07,666
Just saying.
1750
01:35:09,500 --> 01:35:11,458
And I know what you're thinking,
1751
01:35:11,458 --> 01:35:14,583
that giving up my party
for Lydia was my mitzvah project.
1752
01:35:16,875 --> 01:35:18,291
But that's not a mitzvah.
1753
01:35:20,083 --> 01:35:21,708
That's just being a best friend.
1754
01:35:23,583 --> 01:35:24,875
♪ Yeah, turn it up ♪
1755
01:35:28,375 --> 01:35:31,000
Welcome to Mitzvah Bakery.
All proceeds go to charity.
1756
01:35:31,000 --> 01:35:35,083
Helping others, being selfless,
taking the bad and making it good...
1757
01:35:35,083 --> 01:35:36,875
- Breadsticks for four dollars.
- Four dollars.
1758
01:35:36,875 --> 01:35:38,125
That's a mitzvah.
1759
01:35:38,958 --> 01:35:40,166
Stacy, you did this?
1760
01:35:40,166 --> 01:35:42,416
- This is so dope.
- What are you gonna get?
1761
01:35:42,416 --> 01:35:46,583
Okay, obviously you know that.
You're God, which you also know.
1762
01:35:48,000 --> 01:35:49,541
Make sure you say Hamotzi.
1763
01:35:49,541 --> 01:35:52,000
And for one piece, 24 dollars.
1764
01:35:52,916 --> 01:35:55,041
Anyway,
thanks for being patient with me.
1765
01:35:55,041 --> 01:35:56,875
I'm really glad I'm a part of this.
1766
01:35:56,875 --> 01:35:58,625
- Ooh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
1767
01:35:58,625 --> 01:35:59,916
You're very, very welcome!
1768
01:35:59,916 --> 01:36:02,333
Okay, I'll get back to you.
Selling bread.
1769
01:36:02,333 --> 01:36:04,583
Now we're talking mitzvah!
1770
01:36:04,583 --> 01:36:08,250
♪ I'm so hopeless and over you ♪
1771
01:36:08,250 --> 01:36:12,041
♪ Think that you know it too ♪
1772
01:36:16,791 --> 01:36:21,625
♪ I say that it's over ♪
1773
01:36:22,208 --> 01:36:27,000
♪ But here I'm still singing ♪
1774
01:36:27,000 --> 01:36:28,833
♪ Play me something juicy ♪
129072
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Quechua
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkmen
Uighur
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof