All language subtitles for Killing.It.S02E01.720p.WEB.h264-ETHEL

Oh, hell yeah.

That's badass. You're
a fucking warrior.

You're Tarzan. You
tame the jungle.

Now do one where you're smiling.

- Okay.

- Bigger smile.

Bigger. Come on.

Think about all the
snakes you killed.

- No, I didn't like
killing snakes.

- The magazine sent
over a bio that said...

- I was broke and I
entered a contest.

I used the winnings to
start building my empire,

but it was horrifying.

- Okay, then think
about your empire.

Think about how rich you are.

Think about how much
more money you have

than every other person
in this room combined.

- Come on, man. That
doesn't make me smile.

I mean, there's only
five people here.

- Hold on, I just
gotta swap lenses.

Give me the 50.
- Grab the 50!

- You know, I've shot a
ton of CEOs, 12 covers.

This snake thing has got to be

the craziest origin
story I've ever heard.

- Honestly, that shit was boring

compared to what came next.

- Oh, fuck. What came next?

- Three words:

saw palmetto berries.

- Oh.

- They're worth a fortune

and they only grow
in coastal Florida.

- I mean, okay. Cool.

- Cool?

It was a modern-day gold rush.
- Yeah, sure.

It just sounds way less
exciting than snake hunting.

- That's because you haven't
heard the story, motherfucker.

Listen up.

One, two, three.

Welcome to Henry's Farm.

As you can see, we're
just getting settled.

It's taken a long time
to get to this point,

but we're on track.

- This lush and fecund swampland

is ready to burst forth
with fertile abundance.

- Did we agree on that language?

- We'll postgame
later. Stay focused.

- As my partner was saying,

a purchase commitment
from Green Bounty Organics

would allow us to secure
additional funding to grow...

- Okay, okay, okay,
okay. We're in.

- What?
- You are?

- Saw palmetto extract is huge.

The whole men's health
market is exploding,

so we're prepared

to prepurchase your entire crop.

What do you say?

- I'm sorry, I'm just so
used to being rejected.

I was prepared to follow
you to your car pleading.

- And I was supposed to tell you

how both of our dad's died.

Gunshot, heart attack.

- Why would that
have been relevant?

- Endearing context
for our struggles.

- It doesn't matter. Yes,
we will take the deal.

Here we go.

- Ooh!

- Do you want to sign
on the hood of my car?

- Or, if you don't mind waiting,

we can do it in our new office,

kick this partnership
off in style.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

- Fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck.

No!

You know, I can
actually sign out here.

It's nice to do
business in the sun.

Jillian, back desk, now!

Initial here. Sign here.

We're in business.
No backsies.

- Yo, it's Zay.
Leave a message.

- It's me, calling again
for the hundredth time.

Hope you're having fun
out west or wherever.

Nessa's coming. I get
to show off to her,

so it's a big day here.

Thought I'd give you a
shot, see if you answer.

Anyway, give me a call.

This is your brother, Craig,
from growing up together.

Gabriel.

There he is. How's it going?

- I almost filled up another
crate of the berries, sir.

I love that!

Angel, my man.

How much money did
you make me today?

- Uh...
- I'm kidding with you.

I'm just in such a good mood.

My daughter's visiting
from California today.

She's never seen the farm.

I'm so excited to show her

something I built
with my own two hands.

Our own four hands.

Everyone lends a hand.
It doesn't matter.

- J Glopp, what up, partner?

- I feel so bad parking the
Kia next to the billboard.

It's like bringing a hot
new boyfriend around an ex.

- I know you love
this car, Jillian,

but it's really
not that special.

- So now Bluetooth connectivity

is "not that special."

I'm sorry, can you transmit
sound through the air?

- That's kind of
what talking is.

- Your Toyota Tundra's
a fucking joke.

- What was that?
- Nothing.

Is Nessa here yet?
Are you excited?

You must be so excited.
- I can't wait.

It's been ten
months. She's 13 now.

She's never seen me
succeed at anything before.

- If you want your
daughter to like the place,

you might want to
have the guy come

and empty the port-a-potty.

- Shayla, it was just
emptied last week.

- It needs to be emptied
every week, boss.

- There are only five
of us on this farm.

It shouldn't fill up that fast.

- Oh, I know it
shouldn't, and yet...

- Look, I don't want to get
in another fight about this

because my daughter's coming
and I don't want to be

embarrassed in front of her,
but I go above and beyond

what's legally required of
me in terms of sanitation.

- I'm not as versed
in shit law as you,

but I do know this:
it bakes in the sun,

and if I'm in there for
more than 20 minutes,

I feel like I'm
about to pass out.

- Why are you ever in
there more than 20 minutes?

- Whoa, asking a woman?

That's technically harassment,
Craig, and you're on tape.

- Shayla, it's too expensive

to have the truck
come every week.

End of discussion.
- Jillian?

- We'll figure out a
way to make it work.

- No, we won't!

You can't let that absolute

soft serve machine
order you around.

- She's not ordering me
around. She's my friend.

- Jillian, you're a boss.

These are your employees,
not your friends.

- You can be someone's
boss and their friend.

Chewbacca is great
friends with Han Solo.

- You do you.

I'm not gonna worry about it

because Nessa's almost
here and I am happy.

- Hey, Craig Foster.

- Yeah. I'm sorry, who are you?

- Natalie-Ray Boone.

My family works down the road.
You ever heard of Carpets?

- Yeah, the old strip club.
- Yeah, that's our place.

We got closed down when this

"Good Will Hunting"
-ass stripper

started to poke
around in our taxes.

- Hmm.

- You want to come with me?

I want to talk to you about
a business proposition.

- Wow. That's flattering.

And as much as everything
about your vibe seems normal,

I'm actually really
busy right now.

- I wasn't asking.

Welcome to Carpets,

where the only carpet
is on the floor.

- Fucking seriously, Ray-Nathan?

- Oh, shit.

- What the fuck,
Nattie? Who's this?

- Oh, this is our neighbor
Mom told me to go get.

- Well, nobody fucking told me.

- Oh, I told you. You
just don't listen to me.

You're always looking
at your phone.

- The group chat doesn't
care if I'm busy.

When it pops off, it pops off.

- Hey, if you're busy, I
can come back another time.

You can call me.
- Nah, fuck it.

Probably good for him to
see who he's dealing with.

See this gentleman here?

He was supposed to deliver
some merchandise for us.

- Drugs.

- And that merchandise
mysteriously went missing.

- He did the drugs.

- God damn it, Nattie.

I'm trying to be evocative here.

You got no mystique. That's
why you're still single.

- I'm single 'cause
I work all the time.

- Now, this

is what happens

when somebody messes
with our merchandise.

Hell no.

- Nobody fucks with the Boones!

Please help me!

Come on. Sic him.

What the hell? Why
isn't he hungry, huh?

Did you feed the fucking gator?

- Well, the thing
about Buttercup...

- Don't fucking name him,
and definitely not Buttercup!

- Okay, first of
all, it is a girl

because she is pretty.

And yes, I gave her a treat.

If we want her to be sweet,

we have to give her
a treat to be sweet!

- We don't want her to be sweet.

She's an alligator. She's
supposed to be scary.

- You know what's fucking scary

is when a cutie
doesn't get her treat.

- Leave it! Hey, leave it.

Leave it.

I'm Jackie Boone,

and these are my
dumb-fuck children.

We have a business
proposal for you.

- I think there's been
some kind of mistake.

I just own a saw palmetto farm.

- Yeah, we fucking know.

We used to run the saw
palmetto berry game.

- Yeah, we'd pick on public land

and sell to the
supplement companies.

Easy money.

- It's the best kind of money.

- Yeah, but they cut us out

by bribing the state
to change the laws.

Now you have to own the land
where you get your berries.

- And the supplement
companies bought up

all the fucking swampland.

- So here's what
we're proposing.

We recently picked
a bunch of berries

out in the Everglades.

We would like to say

that them berries
come from your farm.

You sell them. We
split the profits.

- 80/20.

- So you want to launder
your berries through my farm.

- You make it sound unseemly.

We're just small
business owners,

just like you.

- What happens if I say no?

- That's a conversation you can
have with Buttercup over there.

- Motherfucker!
It's the treats.

- It's not the treats.

She's just relaxed 'cause
we're all together.

- This is definitely intriguing,

but, um...

I just worked so hard
to get where I am.

I'd rather just
keep it aboveboard.

- Man with a code.

I can respect that.

You want to drive
Mr. Foster back to his farm?

- Craig! Where did you go?

I had to entertain Nessa
for, like, 30 minutes.

- They're here?
- She's a tough nut to crack.

I asked her if she wanted
to see how easy it is

to pair your phone to
the Kia's Bluetooth,

and she just said "why?"

- Guess she's
officially a teenager.

- Dad!
- Hey, hey, hey.

Oh, that's my girl.

Look at you. You
getting taller?

You look taller.
- This place is so cool.

Do you call it Henry Farms
because of Grandpa Henry?

- Just wanted to
honor his memory.

- That's so sweet. You
know what'd be sweeter?

Nessa Farms.

- Nessa Farms wasn't
even my second choice.

Craig Farms was number two.

Third place was Project Genesis

'cause I thought
it sounded cool.

- Hmm.
- Come on.

Let me show you around.
Where's your mom?

- She's in the car.
She needed the A/C.

- In luxury cars like the Kia,
it's called climate control.

- Hey, Camille. Come on.
I want to give you a tour.

- I would've told you,

but she wanted to
tell you first.

- It's fine. It's...

It's her life. None
of my business.

I'm not even gonna
ask who the father is.

- I didn't ask either
because I thought you would.

Now we just don't get to know?

- Oh, you're right.
That's insane.

Whose is it? Is
it someone I know?

- Not yours? How's
that make sense?

- Why didn't I
learn sign language?

I had a year.
- You're a surrogate?

When did you decide to do this?

- Dad, they're
paying her $60,000.

- I don't understand.
Why do you need money?

Didn't you just get a
great job in Oakland?

Isn't that why our daughter
lives 3,000 miles away from me?

- You know I'm
doing well, right?

This is my farm that I own.

We just had our first harvest.
We're about to get paid.

We have an actual contract
with a supplement company.

Next week, we're
delivering these berries

and we're getting a
lot more than $60,000.

We are thriving here!

- Hello.
- Who are you?

- Hi. I'm with the
state of Florida.

We're shutting you down.

- What do you mean,
you're shutting us down?

- Well...
- Oh, hell yeah! Toilet police!

- He's not here because of
the port-a-potties, Shayla.

You're not, are you?
- No, sir.

I'm with the Florida
Department of Agriculture.

- Okay, but do you work
in the same building

as the toilet police?
- No, ma'am.

I'm just here about the
giant African land snails.

They've been
spotted in the area.

- Snails?
- What do you mean giant?

- Well, these snails
are an invasive species

that devour all plant life.

They can destroy
entire ecosystems

in a matter of months.

Now, I know what
you're gonna say.

"Sounds like my ex-wife."

We've been trained
to make light patter

while we break bad news.

I don't even have an ex-wife.

Is the tension released?

- No, the tension's
not released!

The tension's very fucking high!

- We don't have giant
snails on our farm.

- According to you, but
we still have to check.

We're placing the entire
area under quarantine.

Ten-mile radius.

No agricultural
materials in or out

until the snails are gone.
- No!

Our first harvest
goes out next week.

We need that payment
to keep us in business.

- Dad, are you going
out of business?

- No, we just have bills due.

- All businesses take on
debt as they're starting out.

I wish everyone
understood sign language

'cause then they would
see that you bully me.

- I'm sorry, but the snails
also carry meningitis.

It can kill one in ten
people who are infected.

- Well, do you know what else
you can get diseases from?

Fecal matter.
- Shayla, get back to work.

- Uh, work's canceled.
Haven't you heard?

- Work's not canceled.

- Are we going to get fired?
- Don't worry, guys.

Even if they shut us down,

I promise you'll
keep getting paid.

And Margarita
Monday is still on.

- You can't promise them that.

- I already juiced
the limes, Craig.

- Dad.

- What can we do
to speed this up?

- Ha, you sound like my ex-wife

on our wedding night.

There aren't usually
children at these.

And there's nothing you can do
but let the process play out.

Well, you folks
have a great day.

- Just out of curiosity...

Not that I'd ever break the law,

but what would happen
if we just ignored you

and drove off with our berries?

- You couldn't even
if you wanted to.

We're stopping every
vehicle in or out.

- Yeah, good.

That's why I was saying
I would never do it.

Seems crazy you felt you
had bring us out here.

- My partner and I
will be coming around

to all the farms
one-by-one to inspect.

We have to be thorough,
so it takes time.

Give us between
two and ten days.

- Fuck! I mean,
two days is fine.

Hopefully it won't be ten.

Yo, what the hell,
man? Where you been?

- I am so sorry. I
know that took forever.

I've just had my hands full

because my partner
killed himself.

- Oh, my God.
- Did you see it coming?

Were you the one who found him?

How are you otherwise?

I've never had this
conversation before.

I don't know what
questions to ask.

- You know what? I shouldn't
have brought it up.

Today's about you and your farm.

Just don't ask me
what the note said.

- What'd the note say?
- I wouldn't know.

His wife won't let me
read it, which is fine.

- All right, so...
- Really makes me feel like

there's something
about me in there.

I'm sorry.

I'm not being very
professional, am I?

- No, it's fine.
- Just our snail guy

talking about
suicide. It's cool.

- Look, I know you're anxious

for the quarantine to be
over, but the good news is,

I have a new partner

who's really gonna help
speed things along.

Okay. Meet Sally.
- Aww!

- She's been specially
trained to detect

giant African land snails

with that cute
little nose of hers.

She's also been trained to
detect suicidal ideation

in her human companions, so
she's got an eye on me too.

Nothing's gonna happen to
me with you around, is it?

No,
it's not. No, it's not.

Now,
I just need to let her

get the scent of the snails

so she knows what
she's tracking.

- What the fuck?
- Oh, wow, the snail's so big.

- Why is it that size?

- Because it's a giant
African land snail.

- It's fucking weird.

- All right, Sal,
take a big whiff.

- Oh, my God!
- She ate it!

- Dogs don't get
meningitis, right?

- Wrong. It's so
deadly for them.

Why is this happening?
Come on, girl!

- You still gotta
do the inspection!

- Come on, get in the truck.

- Hey, hey, we really need
this quarantine lifted.

We're
gonna lose everything!

Hey, can we at least
schedule a follow-up?

- Don't worry, I'm sure
the dog will be fine

and he'll be right back.

Well, the dog died.

- Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry.

Are you okay?
- Nope.

- So you want to get started

with the inspection,
because the bank...

- I actually didn't
come for an inspection.

- Why are you here?

- I thought you
might want to know

what happened to Sally.

You were the last people
to see her alive, you know?

- That really is quite special.

- As for me,

I'm taking some time off
for my mental health.

- The bank is gonna
take our farm.

Can you send someone else
to do the inspection?

- Well, no, it's my job,
so I shouldn't be punished

for feeling sad.
- You should just get fired.

- I'm sorry, what was that?

I've been having trouble
hearing ever since

the multiple traumatic
events I've experienced!

- Healing takes time.

We look forward to seeing
you whenever you feel ready.

- Thank you.

- So just, like, a
day or two, right?

- Definitely, yeah.
Like a day or two.

- How many mental health
days are you allowed to take?

- Well, you're allowed to
take as many as you need,

but you only get paid
for ten, so here I am.

Let's find some snails.

- No, we don't want
to find snails.

That will ruin us.

- I don't know, maybe
it would be better

if we all just got
meningitis and died.

- I think you need
to get another dog

to keep an eye on you.

- He can go pet shopping
after he inspects

our fucking farm, Jillian.

How long's this gonna take?

- Well, usually it
takes about three hours.

- Okay, three hours is fine.
- With a dog.

If you accidentally
killed your dog,

it takes a lot longer.

Probably more like ten.

- Just ten?
- Just ten.

- Hello, my man, we good?

You get paid by the
fucking hour or something?

Come on!

- Okay, here's your report.

No snails, no eggs,
no residue on berries.

- That's it? We're done?
- You're done.

- Thank you so much.
- I'm gonna call the bank.

How soon can you
lift the quarantine?

- Oh, that'll take months.

Quarantine stays
until every farm

in the area's been inspected.

Yours was the first.

You're welcome.

- I hate you.

- Craig, come in. Come in.

- Mr. Franks, hey.

- How long has it been?
- Uh, too long.

- Yeah. Is this your daughter?

- No. This is my
business partner.

- Oh.
- You work here now?

- Yeah, I had to transfer

because of a misunderstanding
at the old branch.

- What kind of misunderstanding?

- Doesn't matter.
This isn't about me.

I assume you're here to talk
about your saw palmetto farm.

I'm just so glad someone
gave you a loan for that.

- Thank you, and we know
we're behind on payments,

but it's really not our fault.

- I was fired for being
too nice to women.

Tell me how that makes sense.

- It doesn't.
- It doesn't.

Thank you. Go on.

- Well, we've had a bit of
a delay with our berries,

but they are totally safe.

- Just like me.

Did you know that the
average person needs

eight hugs a day to be happy?

And it doesn't have to be
from eight different people.

It could be from the same man.

- Mm.
- Interesting.

- Mm-hmm. You were saying?

- We just need one more
extension while the state...

- And the only reason I
"targeted" female coworkers

is because they were always
frowning when I walked by.

- Mr. Franks, this is
very important to us.

Can we please have an extension?

We just need two more months.

- It seems like you've
been treated unfairly,

and we have known each
other for so long.

I'd love to help
you.

But I'm already
on thin ice here.

And even the risk of
appearing too nice,

especially with such
a beautiful woman,

it's just...

I can't.

We'll begin
foreclosure next week.

Oh, that face.

You look like you
could use a hug.

Come on.

Come on. Up, up, up.

Yeah. Oh.

- Okay, that's... that's
enough, Mr. Franks.

We gonna take off
now, Mr. Franks.

- Okay.
- Mr. Franks.

Hey, Zay, it's me. Again.

Don't know if you're getting
these, but if you are,

just wondering if
maybe you have an idea

on how to sneak 10,000
pounds of berries

past a fucking
military checkpoint.

I'm really fucked here, man.

It would mean a lot to me
just to know you're all right.

Even if you don't have an
idea about the berry thing,

just give me a call.

- Craig?

Shayla had a question.

- Are you aware how bad

the port-a-potty
situation has gotten?

Hmm?

Smell's so foul,
it stings my eyes.

Oh, and that Febreze
you put in there?

- That was me.
- It's a fricking joke.

"Bora Bora Waters" my ass.
- I'm so sorry.

- Just call the shit truck
to suck out the poops.

- Motherfucker.

I know how we're gonna
get the berries out.

- It's pretty standard stuff.

This switch turns on the vacuum.

This lever dumps your
cargo from the bottom.

- Wait, you finally caved?

You're cleaning the shit pit?

- Hey, you were right.

I gotta empty it out more.

- Wow. Thank you.

Man, I know I've been a real
thorn in your sack on this one,

but this is gonna make
a huge difference.

A little dignity goes
a long way, Craig.

You're a good boss.

- Thanks, Shayla.

Now get back to work.

- Wait, am I here to
empty the port-a-potty?

I brought a fully sterilized
truck 'cause I thought

you were gonna fill it
with berries or whatever.

- Shh, keep your voice down.
Technically, we're not supposed

to bring the berries
through the checkpoint.

- Just so you know, our
berries don't have meningitis,

so they're not
gonna kill anyone.

- Ma'am, I don't know
what you're talking about,

and honestly, I don't care.

Just give me my 2 grand,
and for the next four hours,

you can kill whoever you want.

- No, we're not
gonna kill anyone.

- I don't care.

Just give me my money.

- And you're sure the dogs
won't smell the berries?

- That's triple-wall steel.

No odors in or out.

- And the paperwork's in there?

- Yeah, everything's
in the truck.

- And how did you get
into this business?

What was your journey?
- Jillian.

- What?
- It's research.

What if the guards start asking
questions at the checkpoint?

- You think they're gonna ask us

about our journey into
the shit business?

- It's actually kind of
an interesting story.

So my dad went to high
school with Hulk Hogan...

- We don't have time
for this, Steve Jr.

Thank you for your truck.

Why is this so
difficult? Jesus!

- You think if we both
didn't have dead dads,

we'd know how to drive a truck?

- Jillian...

Maybe.

- Paperwork.

- Uh, there you go.

- Can you open up the tank, sir?

- Yes, I can, but it
dumps from the bottom,

and if I release it,
there'll be a bunch

of fecal matter on the road.

I mean, if that's
what you want...

- That won't be necessary.
- Mm.

- So you're Steve Jr.

- That's correct. The
Wonderful Wizard of Waste.

- Hey, can I ask you something?
- Hmm.

- How'd you get into
this line of work?

- Well, my father...

- His dad went to high
school with Hulk Hogan.

- Right.
- Oh, really?

- Yes, so my dad and
Hulk Hogan, they were...

- Both in love
with the same girl.

- Right. They were
both in love...

- And then they got into
an ultimate prank war,

but it went too far.

- Jillian, I'm trying
to tell the story

as quickly as possible.

- I don't know why.
It's really interesting.

- Well, my dad and Hulk were
always topping each other...

Like, in the prank war.

Incoming!

- Stop that shit truck!

Don't let him leave.

- Don't let her see us.
Don't let her see us.

- This guy was supposed
to fucking empty

the port-a-potty, but he didn't.

It's still full. It's
fucking brimming.

- Ma'am, get back in the car.
- Get the fuck out of my way.

"Wizard of Waste" my ass.

Listen, you motherf...

Craig?
- Hi, Shayla.

- Why are you driving
the shit truck?

- Craig?

I thought your
name was Steve Jr.

- Craig's his last name.

His first name is Steve
Jr. Steve Jr. Craig.

- Sir, ma'am, I'm
gonna have to ask you

to step out of the vehicle.

- So what are you gonna do now?

- I don't know.

I can't stay in Miami.
Too many ghosts.

Maybe I'll travel,
learn an instrument.

- What are you
gonna do about us?

- Oh, well, you tried
to break quarantine,

so you'll have to
pay the largest fine

the state of Florida can
levy against a corporation.

- Fuck.

- $50.

- I can do 50.

- Also, we're gonna have
to burn your berries.

- I'm sorry, did you say burn?

- So that's it.

Everything we worked
for up in flames.

It's all over.

- Not quite.

- Hey, what can I do
for you, neighbor?

- Well, we thought
it over, and...

we'll do it.

We'll launder your
berries for you.

- I am so glad you
changed your mind.

Jackie Boone.
- Hi.

I'm Jillian Glopp,
and I'm so sorry,

I have to ask.

Did you just kill an alligator?

- I was sick of my dumb-fuck
kids fighting over her,

so I did what I had to do.

Welcome to the family.

- ♪ Hey, now, you
better listen to me ♪

♪ Every one of you ♪

♪ We've got a lotta, lotta,
lotta, lotta work to do ♪

♪ Forget about your women ♪

♪ And that water can ♪

♪ Today, we're
working for the man ♪

♪ Oh, whoa, whoa, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Well, pick up your feet,
we've got a deadline to meet ♪

♪ I'm gonna see you
make it on time ♪

♪ Oh, don't relax, I
want elbows and backs ♪

♪ I wanna see
everybody from behind ♪

♪ 'Cause you're
working for the man ♪

♪ Working for the man ♪

♪ You gotta make him a hand ♪

♪ Working for the man ♪

♪ So I'm picking 'em up
and I'm laying 'em down ♪

♪ I believe he's gonna
work me into the ground ♪

♪ I pull to the left,
I heave to the right ♪

♪ I oughta kill him, but
it wouldn't be right ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm working
for the man ♪

♪ Working for the man ♪

♪ I gotta make him a hand ♪

♪ Working for the man ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

- Not a doctor. Shh.