All language subtitles for Frankie Go Boom (2012) [BluRay PFa]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal) Download
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:48,391 --> 00:00:50,610 Hey, Frankie, let's go have a picnic. 2 00:00:50,685 --> 00:00:52,608 No, I don't trust you. 3 00:00:53,271 --> 00:00:55,774 I got your favourite cupcakes. 4 00:00:58,359 --> 00:00:59,952 Are they real this time? 5 00:01:01,571 --> 00:01:02,788 Mom! 6 00:01:05,408 --> 00:01:08,287 He's your brother! Your damn brother. 7 00:01:12,081 --> 00:01:13,253 Get over here! 8 00:01:14,125 --> 00:01:17,220 Where'd you get those cameras, you little fuck? 9 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:23,263 Where'd you get those cameras? 10 00:01:23,676 --> 00:01:24,893 Did you steal them? 11 00:01:28,472 --> 00:01:30,725 Get back here, you little fucker, I'm gonna kill you! 12 00:02:27,448 --> 00:02:28,540 Mom. I can't talk. 13 00:02:28,699 --> 00:02:30,372 You sound tense. 14 00:02:30,451 --> 00:02:32,874 I'm not tense. I'm writing. Can I call you back'? 15 00:02:33,037 --> 00:02:35,790 No, no, no. It'll only take a second. What're you writing? 16 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,292 What do you think I'm writing, Mom? 17 00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:40,382 Writing books you never finish is masturbation, Frank. 18 00:02:40,628 --> 00:02:43,222 And I mean that with love, so don't take it as an insult. 19 00:02:45,758 --> 00:02:48,887 Anyway, there's a party on Friday for your brother, and he wants you to come. 20 00:02:49,053 --> 00:02:54,105 Mom, I don't see Bruce. I don't talk to Bruce. You know it, he knows it. 21 00:02:54,308 --> 00:02:56,902 It's been three years now! Get over it. 22 00:02:56,978 --> 00:02:59,822 - Mom, I'm hanging up. I'll call you back. - Let it go. He's off drugs. 23 00:03:01,273 --> 00:03:04,903 He wanted it to be a surprise. I know you two have your stuff, 24 00:03:05,319 --> 00:03:08,368 and his counsellor said everyone has to go through this on their own time. 25 00:03:08,447 --> 00:03:11,041 But if you can come to his graduation thing, I think you should. 26 00:03:13,619 --> 00:03:19,251 Mom, I just don't think it's a good idea. I'm really into this book. 27 00:03:20,167 --> 00:03:26,095 And I just started a garden. Looks amazing. But tell Bruce I'm proud of him. 28 00:03:26,716 --> 00:03:29,515 No, you know what? I'll tell him myself. I'll write him a letter. 29 00:03:29,927 --> 00:03:34,524 My God. Would you really do that? And when he finds out you're not coming 30 00:03:34,598 --> 00:03:37,442 and he overdoses in a crack house, we can read it at his funeral. 31 00:03:46,610 --> 00:03:47,862 Fuck! 32 00:04:57,973 --> 00:05:00,271 There you are! Bruce called. 33 00:05:00,351 --> 00:05:02,445 All the other families are there. I don't want to be late. 34 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:03,612 Chris, he's here! 35 00:05:04,105 --> 00:05:05,106 Hi, Mom. 36 00:05:05,397 --> 00:05:07,365 Come on, the "hi" was implied. 37 00:05:08,692 --> 00:05:09,989 A lot of pictures of Bruce. 38 00:05:10,111 --> 00:05:12,955 Bonnie Hubbard's son raped a girl when he got out of rehab. 39 00:05:13,114 --> 00:05:14,707 We want Bruce to feel loved. 40 00:05:15,157 --> 00:05:16,625 - Sure. - Chris! 41 00:05:16,700 --> 00:05:17,826 I'm here. Stop yelling. 42 00:05:17,910 --> 00:05:21,039 Why are you wearing the burgundy when I suggested the blue? 43 00:05:21,122 --> 00:05:22,123 What? You said red. 44 00:05:22,206 --> 00:05:24,129 Tell your son it's time for him to move back home. 45 00:05:24,208 --> 00:05:25,209 What? 46 00:05:25,292 --> 00:05:29,047 My people are Jewish. Moses led us out of the desert. It is disrespectful to go back. 47 00:05:29,171 --> 00:05:32,015 Would you please stop picking on him? If what happened to him at his wedding 48 00:05:32,091 --> 00:05:34,514 happened to you at your wedding, you'd want to hide in the desert, too. 49 00:05:34,593 --> 00:05:35,594 - Hi, Frankie. - Hi, Dad. 50 00:05:35,678 --> 00:05:36,804 - So now he's guilty? - Guilty? 51 00:05:36,887 --> 00:05:38,230 - Who said anything about him being guilty? - You did! 52 00:05:38,305 --> 00:05:39,829 - And you said it in your own words! - He's traumatised. 53 00:05:39,849 --> 00:05:42,068 And look at that! That is not a blue sweater, that's a grey sweater. 54 00:05:42,643 --> 00:05:44,520 We'll have to use your car. 55 00:05:45,354 --> 00:05:46,446 What's wrong with yours? 56 00:05:46,522 --> 00:05:49,401 We don't have cars right now. Bruce stole them for drugs. 57 00:05:49,483 --> 00:05:50,905 We said we wouldn't tell him! 58 00:05:50,985 --> 00:05:52,157 Who said we wouldn't tell him? 59 00:05:52,236 --> 00:05:55,957 I'm sorry, Bruce stole your cars and sold them for drugs? 60 00:05:56,031 --> 00:05:57,749 Why are you so hard on your brother? 61 00:05:58,200 --> 00:06:01,955 Drug addiction is a disease. Would you be mad at somebody because they got cancer? 62 00:06:02,204 --> 00:06:03,956 If they stole my fucking car, I would. 63 00:06:04,248 --> 00:06:07,422 Just don't mention it tonight. Besides, the mopeds are fine. 64 00:06:10,254 --> 00:06:11,676 They're all we could afford. 65 00:06:11,755 --> 00:06:15,885 Apparently, the insurance company doesn't consider it theft if it's family. 66 00:06:22,933 --> 00:06:26,779 Hi, my name is Bruce, and I am an addict and an alcoholic. 67 00:06:28,397 --> 00:06:29,899 Thank you, thank you. 68 00:06:30,399 --> 00:06:33,198 Today's a big day for me. I've just come out of rehab. 69 00:06:33,986 --> 00:06:35,784 And today I am 90 days sober. 70 00:06:37,615 --> 00:06:38,616 Who's that woman? 71 00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:39,700 Thank you, thank you. 72 00:06:40,117 --> 00:06:41,209 Think I know her. 73 00:06:41,285 --> 00:06:42,286 Thank you, thank you. 74 00:06:42,453 --> 00:06:44,626 - Be quiet. - Thank you, thank you. 75 00:06:46,123 --> 00:06:50,629 My disease had left me in a drug-induced sleep. 76 00:06:51,795 --> 00:06:56,175 It was rough. But even then I had a dream. 77 00:06:56,300 --> 00:07:01,477 Just like this guy. Just like old Marty King. "I had a dream." 78 00:07:02,598 --> 00:07:07,570 My slavery was not picking cotton, or eating gumbo, or whatever. 79 00:07:08,145 --> 00:07:12,321 But it was gin and it was cocaine. And I have been released. 80 00:07:17,655 --> 00:07:18,656 Thank you. 81 00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:24,750 Today, I would like to thank Mom and Dad and Frankie. 82 00:07:25,663 --> 00:07:27,006 This is for you. 83 00:07:27,790 --> 00:07:28,791 Thank you. 84 00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:38,176 There they are! 85 00:07:38,300 --> 00:07:39,472 There he is. 86 00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:43,851 You look so pretty today. 87 00:07:43,931 --> 00:07:45,228 There's my leading man! 88 00:07:45,307 --> 00:07:46,650 Say something, Frankie! 89 00:07:46,725 --> 00:07:48,568 Would you not do that, please? 90 00:07:48,727 --> 00:07:52,857 I'm sorry. I've been waiting three months to get this puppy back in my hands. 91 00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:56,160 Bruce put his directing career on hold while he was getting better. 92 00:07:56,235 --> 00:07:57,953 They don't allow cameras in rehab. 93 00:07:58,028 --> 00:07:59,154 Is that really Jack Knoll? 94 00:07:59,238 --> 00:08:00,455 Yeah, I never told you... 95 00:08:00,656 --> 00:08:03,000 Jack! Jack! Come over and meet my family. 96 00:08:03,117 --> 00:08:04,209 Two seconds! 97 00:08:04,535 --> 00:08:06,082 We might be doing a picture together. 98 00:08:06,245 --> 00:08:09,749 With you directing? Did you hear that? My God! 99 00:08:10,249 --> 00:08:12,251 When did you become a director, Bruce? 100 00:08:12,876 --> 00:08:15,049 Dude, I've been directing my whole life. 101 00:08:15,296 --> 00:08:18,049 Don't you remember all those funny movies you used to make when you were boys? 102 00:08:18,132 --> 00:08:21,306 He tortured him. Bruce tortured him on film. 103 00:08:21,385 --> 00:08:22,682 That's not true. 104 00:08:27,266 --> 00:08:31,191 It's good to see you. I haven't seen you since the wedding. 105 00:08:31,895 --> 00:08:33,067 - Rishr.> - Yup. 106 00:08:34,106 --> 00:08:35,358 You're not still mad about that, are you? 107 00:08:37,776 --> 00:08:38,993 Let's just forget about it, Bruce. 108 00:08:39,069 --> 00:08:41,663 - Right. You don't wanna talk about it? - Nope, not really. 109 00:08:41,739 --> 00:08:43,207 It's just that I kind of wanted to talk about it. 110 00:08:43,324 --> 00:08:45,668 Do you think it would be okay just to keep this about now? 111 00:08:45,743 --> 00:08:46,710 That's not a problem. 112 00:08:46,785 --> 00:08:50,790 Jack Knoll. Isn't he that actor with all those guns? Didn't he shoot somebody'? 113 00:08:50,914 --> 00:08:54,043 Hey! Bruce, your old man's fucking gossiping about me, man. 114 00:08:54,835 --> 00:08:57,964 I'm just kidding, man. I'm just kidding. I'm Jack. I love you people. 115 00:08:58,255 --> 00:09:00,678 I just grazed him, didn't really hurt him. 116 00:09:00,966 --> 00:09:04,937 Listen, your son, this man here, saved my life. 117 00:09:05,846 --> 00:09:11,148 If it hadn't been for him, I would've just ripped my skull, right above my eyebrows, 118 00:09:11,226 --> 00:09:13,979 just ripped it off and taken my brains and smashed them out. 119 00:09:14,104 --> 00:09:15,151 This man is a saint. 120 00:09:15,272 --> 00:09:16,865 Those are sweet words. Thank you, Jack. 121 00:09:17,524 --> 00:09:20,198 Bruce, are these your parents? . Yes. 122 00:09:20,277 --> 00:09:21,870 You must be so proud. 123 00:09:22,946 --> 00:09:24,573 Dharma, this is my family. 124 00:09:24,948 --> 00:09:26,291 Are you in show business? 125 00:09:26,492 --> 00:09:30,747 Mom, this is Dharma D-Cup. She's been, like, in a billion porn movies. 126 00:09:30,996 --> 00:09:33,340 - Really? - Yeah, but I'm done with all that. 127 00:09:33,624 --> 00:09:35,592 I'm going to try and get into real acting. 128 00:09:36,543 --> 00:09:37,760 I'm sure you'll be great. 129 00:09:37,961 --> 00:09:38,962 Thanks. 130 00:09:39,296 --> 00:09:41,298 You're a terrific actor. 131 00:09:41,924 --> 00:09:42,925 What? 132 00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:45,974 You. You have a talent. 133 00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:51,776 You, the way you played that comedy. It's so rare, so special. 134 00:09:51,850 --> 00:09:52,942 You're a great actor. 135 00:09:53,268 --> 00:09:54,645 Thank you. What is he talking about? 136 00:09:54,770 --> 00:09:57,614 The short. The short, man. Superb. 137 00:09:57,773 --> 00:09:59,650 - What short? - My short. 138 00:10:01,276 --> 00:10:05,326 The short that I shot at UCLA film school, bro. Remember? 139 00:10:05,531 --> 00:10:06,828 About the wedding. 140 00:10:07,866 --> 00:10:10,369 Right. You showed them my wedding video? 141 00:10:10,828 --> 00:10:13,331 You know what, it's not actually called My Wedding Video any more. 142 00:10:13,414 --> 00:10:16,042 It's called The Wedding Video for copyright reasons. 143 00:10:20,671 --> 00:10:22,514 Frank! Frank! 144 00:10:23,215 --> 00:10:26,469 Frank, they didn't know it was real. They thought that you were an actor. 145 00:10:26,552 --> 00:10:28,975 Come on, it's not like a million people haven't seen it already. 146 00:10:29,054 --> 00:10:32,649 It wasn't a million people, Bruce. It was 18 million people. 147 00:10:34,852 --> 00:10:37,947 Okay, I shouldn't have shown it to Jack without asking you first. 148 00:10:38,063 --> 00:10:39,064 You think? 149 00:10:39,189 --> 00:10:41,658 And I shouldn't have put it on the Internet. That was a mistake! 150 00:10:42,276 --> 00:10:43,448 Okay, Frank, I'm sorry! 151 00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:47,330 Did you just say you were sorry? 152 00:10:47,406 --> 00:10:49,500 I shouldn't have put your wedding tape on the Internet. 153 00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:54,209 I regret it. It was a long time ago. I've been a shitty brother. 154 00:10:54,455 --> 00:10:59,256 But I'm a different person now. I'm sober. And I would like us to start again. 155 00:11:05,215 --> 00:11:06,341 All right, fine. 156 00:11:07,718 --> 00:11:10,642 I'm gonna cook you breakfast before you go tomorrow. 157 00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:12,063 See you tomorrow. 158 00:11:14,433 --> 00:11:15,935 I love you, Frank! 159 00:11:18,395 --> 00:11:20,443 Hey, hey, watch it! 160 00:11:23,859 --> 00:11:27,238 - Why aren't you in a car? - What? 161 00:11:27,321 --> 00:11:31,292 This is LA. Nobody walks here. 162 00:11:32,075 --> 00:11:35,420 Take a little bit of advice and learn the lay of the land. 163 00:11:35,496 --> 00:11:38,249 Yeah, well, let me give you some advice. There's a rehab back there. 164 00:11:38,373 --> 00:11:40,091 Are you trying to say I'm an alcoholic? 165 00:11:41,376 --> 00:11:43,925 Because that is ridiculous. 166 00:11:44,338 --> 00:11:48,343 Alcoholics don't even ride bicycles, buddy. 167 00:11:48,467 --> 00:11:54,645 They drive in a car. So you are that, you are an alcoholic. 168 00:12:03,106 --> 00:12:04,983 Lady, are you okay? 169 00:12:09,154 --> 00:12:10,155 Hey. 170 00:12:13,742 --> 00:12:14,743 Great. 171 00:12:23,794 --> 00:12:24,795 Lady. 172 00:12:26,129 --> 00:12:27,130 Hey. 173 00:12:57,494 --> 00:12:58,495 Fuck! 174 00:12:58,662 --> 00:12:59,663 Where am I? 175 00:13:02,165 --> 00:13:04,588 - In a parking lot. - Why am I in a parking lot? 176 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,007 You passed out. 177 00:13:08,422 --> 00:13:09,719 So you stayed with me? 178 00:13:11,508 --> 00:13:12,509 Yeah. 179 00:13:13,802 --> 00:13:16,180 Okay. Tell me where you live and I'll take you home. 180 00:13:18,724 --> 00:13:21,523 I don't know where I live any more. 181 00:13:23,061 --> 00:13:28,864 I went home today. And my fiancé, I dressed like this to surprise him. 182 00:13:28,942 --> 00:13:34,073 And then I get home and he was there. And he was playing tag. 183 00:13:35,073 --> 00:13:36,074 Tag? 184 00:13:36,366 --> 00:13:40,712 Naked tag. With the guy who cleans the pool. 185 00:13:40,954 --> 00:13:43,423 The pool boy, I guess. 186 00:13:43,624 --> 00:13:47,720 And he's like, "Babe, what do you mean, you haven't heard of naked tag before?" 187 00:13:47,836 --> 00:13:51,056 "You haven't heard of it?" And I'm like, "No! I haven't heard of it. 188 00:13:51,256 --> 00:13:56,057 "Because it's not even a game, and I'm not an idiot, so stop saying that it's a game." 189 00:13:56,136 --> 00:14:01,484 He's like, "Babe, I have an erection! But it's only because I'm super-competitive!" 190 00:14:01,558 --> 00:14:04,562 And I'm like, "Who's competitive in tag?" 191 00:14:04,853 --> 00:14:07,948 "Have you ever even heard of anyone who's competitive in tag? No!" 192 00:14:08,023 --> 00:14:11,744 "Because it's a game that you play with your friends. It's a friendly game!" 193 00:14:12,569 --> 00:14:14,367 - Fuck. - Yeah, it's usually pretty friendly. 194 00:14:14,905 --> 00:14:20,912 He gets me drunk and then he sits me down and just tells me everything. 195 00:14:24,623 --> 00:14:28,127 I'm sorry. God, I have no idea why I'm laying all of this on you. 196 00:14:28,251 --> 00:14:30,424 I don't even know you. I'm really sorry. 197 00:14:30,712 --> 00:14:33,761 No. It's okay. Really. 198 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,307 I'm sorry. 199 00:14:47,062 --> 00:14:50,407 I don't know what your plans are, but do you maybe wanna go somewhere? 200 00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:56,784 Yeah, you know. Let's go somewhere. 201 00:14:57,614 --> 00:15:01,460 Sure. Okay. 202 00:15:02,619 --> 00:15:04,121 Great. 203 00:15:05,539 --> 00:15:07,257 Would you mind putting your seatbelt on? 204 00:15:07,332 --> 00:15:09,801 It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if I live or die. 205 00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:11,211 Okay... 206 00:15:20,929 --> 00:15:24,433 Wait, no, wait, wait. My parents are asleep in there. 207 00:15:24,975 --> 00:15:26,477 There's a place in the back. 208 00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,139 Shit, that's actually my brother's stuff. 209 00:16:12,564 --> 00:16:14,157 I made this when I was a kid. 210 00:16:14,483 --> 00:16:15,530 Cool. 211 00:16:17,694 --> 00:16:19,116 So you don't live here? 212 00:16:20,238 --> 00:16:25,369 No, no. I actually live in Death Valley. 213 00:16:25,869 --> 00:16:28,292 And what do you do in Death Valley? 214 00:16:28,497 --> 00:16:31,876 I've just been kind of camping out and trying to write this novel, which is... 215 00:16:35,253 --> 00:16:36,721 - Okay. - Is that all right? 216 00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:38,848 Um... Yeah, sure. 217 00:16:40,342 --> 00:16:41,810 So what do you write about? 218 00:16:44,221 --> 00:16:46,144 Revenge, mostly. 219 00:16:47,891 --> 00:16:49,188 What is your name? 220 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:52,312 - Frank. - Frank, I'm Lassie. 221 00:16:53,355 --> 00:16:54,356 - Hi. - Hi. 222 00:16:54,731 --> 00:17:01,615 So, Frank, I was just wondering if perhaps you could just want me tonight. 223 00:17:01,696 --> 00:17:05,200 You can do, honestly, whatever you want to me. 224 00:17:05,700 --> 00:17:07,452 Like, really, pretty much anything. 225 00:17:07,577 --> 00:17:09,250 - Okay, Lassie? - Huh. 226 00:17:10,497 --> 00:17:13,046 Could we maybe kiss first? 227 00:17:14,376 --> 00:17:15,878 Yeah. Yeah. 228 00:17:17,337 --> 00:17:18,384 Okay... 229 00:17:36,898 --> 00:17:38,741 - What's the matter? - What? What? 230 00:17:38,817 --> 00:17:42,037 You're not hard. What's wrong? Am I doing something wrong? 231 00:17:42,112 --> 00:17:43,864 No. We just started. 232 00:17:44,114 --> 00:17:45,741 Right, but, I mean... 233 00:17:45,824 --> 00:17:48,543 - Actually, Lassie, you're kind of squeezing. - Yeah? 234 00:17:48,618 --> 00:17:52,248 I am? Sorry. Is that better? 235 00:17:54,165 --> 00:17:56,588 - I mean, you're still squeezing. - Really'? Fuck. 236 00:17:56,835 --> 00:18:00,339 - Okay, how about that? - That's a little better. 237 00:18:00,672 --> 00:18:01,673 Yeah? 238 00:18:03,008 --> 00:18:06,512 My God, you can eat my bra. Like, I'm not just saying that. It's edible. 239 00:18:06,595 --> 00:18:09,064 I got it in a sex shop. It's not toxic. 240 00:18:09,139 --> 00:18:10,140 - It's a turn-on. - Lassie. 241 00:18:11,141 --> 00:18:13,143 I think I'm okay. For now. 242 00:18:14,728 --> 00:18:15,820 Maybe later. 243 00:18:16,187 --> 00:18:18,406 I'll just... I'll keep it on, so, yeah. 244 00:18:23,278 --> 00:18:26,908 But you're gonna, like... You will eventually get hard tonight. 245 00:18:27,657 --> 00:18:30,126 Right? I'm just asking. 246 00:18:30,327 --> 00:18:31,328 You will... It'll happen? 247 00:18:31,494 --> 00:18:33,292 It's never been a problem before. 248 00:18:34,873 --> 00:18:36,341 I think we'll be fine. 249 00:18:38,335 --> 00:18:39,336 Great. 250 00:18:59,022 --> 00:19:04,199 I'm sorry that I'm crying. It's stupid. You must feel like enough of a failure. 251 00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:14,792 Which you shouldn't. Lots of guys can't get erections sometimes. 252 00:19:15,163 --> 00:19:18,713 God damn it! I just don't understand why I'm taking care of you. 253 00:19:19,167 --> 00:19:22,592 Because, you know what, this is actually a really fucking horrible 254 00:19:22,712 --> 00:19:24,885 time for this to be happening to me! 255 00:19:24,965 --> 00:19:30,893 I just don't understand it, I don't understand why nobody will fuck me! 256 00:19:36,726 --> 00:19:39,070 Your parents. Right, I'm sorry. Fuck. 257 00:19:40,730 --> 00:19:41,777 Thank you. 258 00:19:47,570 --> 00:19:48,787 Fucking hell. 259 00:19:49,447 --> 00:19:52,326 I should just go. So, I'll go. 260 00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:56,747 You don't have to go. 261 00:19:58,081 --> 00:19:59,674 Really. You don't have to go. 262 00:20:16,933 --> 00:20:20,437 Okay. I literally never talk about this. 263 00:20:24,566 --> 00:20:27,035 I found out my fiancée was cheating at our wedding. 264 00:20:27,986 --> 00:20:28,987 Really? 265 00:20:30,905 --> 00:20:34,205 We were only getting married because she was pregnant. 266 00:20:36,661 --> 00:20:38,334 It turns out it wasn't my kid. 267 00:20:39,622 --> 00:20:40,623 Wow. 268 00:20:41,958 --> 00:20:44,507 - My best man. - No way. 269 00:20:47,505 --> 00:20:48,722 What'd you do? 270 00:20:52,635 --> 00:20:53,978 I hit her in the face. 271 00:20:55,013 --> 00:20:57,141 What? Sorry. 272 00:20:58,475 --> 00:21:01,604 It wasn't really a hit. It was more like a slap. 273 00:21:05,315 --> 00:21:07,317 And then I pulled her hair a little. 274 00:21:09,527 --> 00:21:14,533 And then I got an upset stomach and I threw up on her. 275 00:21:16,868 --> 00:21:17,994 It was fucking terrible. 276 00:21:18,328 --> 00:21:24,006 I knew that I knew you from somewhere. I saw that... 277 00:21:24,084 --> 00:21:28,305 - I saw your wedding video! On the Internet. - Yeah, well, a lot of people did. 278 00:21:28,379 --> 00:21:29,756 Why did you put that on the Internet? 279 00:21:29,839 --> 00:21:31,841 I didn't. My brother did. 280 00:21:32,967 --> 00:21:36,016 So weird. My friends used to watch that video all the time. 281 00:21:36,179 --> 00:21:38,728 They thought it was the funniest shit ever. 282 00:21:42,769 --> 00:21:44,021 I never did, though. 283 00:21:46,106 --> 00:21:48,529 I thought that it was just sad. 284 00:21:48,608 --> 00:21:53,489 Like watching someone get their heart stepped on, right in front of you. 285 00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:54,827 Or something. 286 00:21:55,782 --> 00:21:59,002 Well, you're, like, the only person who ever saw that. 287 00:22:07,836 --> 00:22:10,510 You still hate her? The girl? 288 00:22:12,549 --> 00:22:13,766 No. 289 00:22:16,553 --> 00:22:17,520 Yeah. 290 00:22:17,595 --> 00:22:20,064 She sounds exactly like Peter. 291 00:22:20,140 --> 00:22:25,237 Just a lying, cheating, whore bitch. My God. 292 00:22:27,272 --> 00:22:28,364 Go on. 293 00:22:28,648 --> 00:22:33,529 No, I just think that that's really selfish and cruel and evil. 294 00:22:34,237 --> 00:22:35,739 And whore-like. 295 00:22:37,657 --> 00:22:40,501 Okay. One more time. Slow. 296 00:22:42,078 --> 00:22:45,582 Okay, um... Okay. 297 00:22:47,584 --> 00:22:49,552 She was... What was her name? 298 00:22:50,795 --> 00:22:51,796 Sandra. 299 00:22:51,921 --> 00:22:54,640 Sandra is a fucking 300 00:22:57,802 --> 00:22:59,019 horrible 301 00:23:00,889 --> 00:23:02,311 cunt-face 302 00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:05,101 bitch. 303 00:23:06,186 --> 00:23:08,655 And she fucked you up. 304 00:23:09,355 --> 00:23:14,111 She fucked you up and she sent you to Death Valley to die. 305 00:23:23,328 --> 00:23:25,547 - Holy shit. Holy shit! - Okay, now stop talking! 306 00:23:25,663 --> 00:23:27,461 - I can't believe it! - Please just stop talking. 307 00:24:00,698 --> 00:24:02,792 - Morning, Mom. - Morning, horn dog. 308 00:24:03,368 --> 00:24:05,086 I saw your lady friend leaving. 309 00:24:07,205 --> 00:24:08,457 I'm gonna take a shower. 310 00:24:13,962 --> 00:24:15,214 Hey, bro. 311 00:24:15,338 --> 00:24:17,557 Hey, sorry. I didn't know you had company. 312 00:24:17,632 --> 00:24:19,976 No, that's okay. You remember Claudia, right? My editor. 313 00:24:20,385 --> 00:24:22,683 We weren't... We're just friends. 314 00:24:23,471 --> 00:24:27,101 I mean, she'll come over and let me eat her out sometimes, but it's not serious. 315 00:24:27,183 --> 00:24:28,184 Hi, Frank. 316 00:24:29,102 --> 00:24:31,025 Wait. Bro, bro. I wanted to talk to you. 317 00:24:34,148 --> 00:24:37,277 I wanted you to know that I filmed you and that chick last night. 318 00:24:37,610 --> 00:24:40,955 And lam glad that I did. When she hit you with her bike... 319 00:24:41,030 --> 00:24:44,284 - it was awesome. - It was just... Bang! Fucking love happens. 320 00:24:44,367 --> 00:24:46,210 - Italian vibe. - Let's see what happens next. 321 00:24:46,744 --> 00:24:48,121 Like very early Cassavetes. 322 00:24:48,204 --> 00:24:51,834 But I heard you loud and clear last night when you talked about 323 00:24:51,916 --> 00:24:55,045 wanting to be in the loop and all that shit, and here's the deal. 324 00:24:55,211 --> 00:24:57,555 I dropped a copy of what I filmed off at Jack's. 325 00:24:57,880 --> 00:24:59,223 - Good for you, baby. - Get it back. 326 00:24:59,841 --> 00:25:01,684 He asked me to be honest, and now I've just been honest. 327 00:25:01,759 --> 00:25:02,806 - It's pathetic. - Bruce... 328 00:25:02,927 --> 00:25:06,101 - Shit. Let me handle this. - What? 329 00:25:06,389 --> 00:25:09,689 Bro, I'm sorry, okay. 330 00:25:11,561 --> 00:25:16,067 I didn't film you two having the sex. If that's what you're worried about. 331 00:25:16,232 --> 00:25:17,984 I mean, I watched it. But I didn't film it. 332 00:25:18,192 --> 00:25:22,072 Okay. Bruce. You're going to give me the address. 333 00:25:22,238 --> 00:25:24,491 And I am going to go pick up whatever it is you gave him. 334 00:25:24,907 --> 00:25:27,080 VVhy're you being like this? We just had a beautiful moment. 335 00:25:27,410 --> 00:25:29,504 - We had another beautiful moment... - Give me the fucking address! 336 00:25:29,620 --> 00:25:30,997 Boys, stop fighting! 337 00:25:31,456 --> 00:25:36,087 I finally get my life in order! I finally find someone in the business who believes in me. 338 00:25:36,252 --> 00:25:39,722 And I ask my baby brother for one little favour to help me achieve my dream. 339 00:25:39,797 --> 00:25:40,844 And will he help? 340 00:25:40,923 --> 00:25:45,144 How is Jack Knoll seeing a movie of a drunken woman hitting me with her bike 341 00:25:45,261 --> 00:25:47,263 helping you get your dream, Bruce? 342 00:25:47,347 --> 00:25:48,724 Stop fighting! 343 00:25:48,806 --> 00:25:51,525 Because it's funny, man. It's fucking funny. 344 00:25:51,768 --> 00:25:53,645 Not as funny as the stuff in the clubhouse. 345 00:25:56,230 --> 00:25:57,277 What did you say? 346 00:25:57,357 --> 00:25:58,358 Nothing. 347 00:25:59,525 --> 00:26:02,244 Bro, you just swore to me that you didn't film me in the clubhouse. 348 00:26:02,445 --> 00:26:06,951 No, I did not. I swore I didn't film you having sex. And that was true. 349 00:26:08,242 --> 00:26:13,749 But we had sex in the clubhouse! We had sex almost immediately in the clubhouse. 350 00:26:13,831 --> 00:26:15,799 I mean, that's what we did in the clubhouse. 351 00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:18,549 That depends on how you define sex. 352 00:26:18,628 --> 00:26:23,429 Personally, I think that sex involves one of the people having an erection. 353 00:26:23,508 --> 00:26:25,385 - Yeah, that's usually the case. - Will you shut up? 354 00:26:25,593 --> 00:26:29,188 I'm just saying. It took quite a while for that to occur. 355 00:26:29,639 --> 00:26:33,940 But when you finally, finally did achieve that erection, and good for you, bro, 356 00:26:34,185 --> 00:26:37,405 but when you did, I cut. Because, as far as I'm concerned, 357 00:26:37,522 --> 00:26:40,492 sex is a private thing, a sacred thing between two people. 358 00:26:40,650 --> 00:26:42,778 - Even if it takes a while. - Bruce, Bruce. 359 00:26:42,860 --> 00:26:47,115 Listen to my rationale. How many movies have sex in them? 360 00:26:47,365 --> 00:26:48,491 All of them. 361 00:26:48,574 --> 00:26:50,622 How many movies have impotence? 362 00:26:50,701 --> 00:26:51,702 None of them. 363 00:26:51,828 --> 00:26:53,205 Impotence makes us pop. 364 00:26:55,206 --> 00:26:56,298 Am I wrong? 365 00:26:58,167 --> 00:26:59,168 Wow, wow. 366 00:26:59,627 --> 00:27:01,880 You just hate that I'm making something of my life, don't you? 367 00:27:01,963 --> 00:27:03,761 You just hate the fact that I'm a director now. 368 00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:05,842 No. I don't. You know why? 369 00:27:05,925 --> 00:27:10,021 Because you're not a director. You're a fucking pervert. And a freak. 370 00:27:10,346 --> 00:27:14,943 Well, listen to this. Action. Cut. Action. Cut. 371 00:27:16,018 --> 00:27:20,524 Fucking action. That is directing, my friend. 372 00:27:22,442 --> 00:27:25,195 Come on, man. Just let him watch it once. 373 00:27:25,361 --> 00:27:28,786 Did it even occur to you there's another person in your stupid film? 374 00:27:28,865 --> 00:27:30,412 I mean, did you even think about that? 375 00:27:31,701 --> 00:27:33,123 Mr Knoll! 376 00:27:35,413 --> 00:27:38,542 Jack? Jack? 377 00:27:42,628 --> 00:27:44,471 - You just gonna walk in? - Yes. 378 00:27:44,547 --> 00:27:47,721 Jack? Hello? 379 00:27:58,519 --> 00:27:59,896 Buddy? 380 00:28:06,110 --> 00:28:07,578 Is this his house? 381 00:28:08,279 --> 00:28:09,451 Must be redecorating. 382 00:28:10,281 --> 00:28:11,578 Jackie-boy? 383 00:28:17,038 --> 00:28:18,039 Hey, man. 384 00:28:18,498 --> 00:28:20,171 Hey. Almost done. 385 00:28:20,416 --> 00:28:22,919 What's up? You look amazing. 386 00:28:24,337 --> 00:28:25,839 Where's all your stuff, bro? 387 00:28:25,922 --> 00:28:29,426 Collection agency. Said they're coming for my treadmill this morning. 388 00:28:29,717 --> 00:28:31,594 Let them try. Let them try! 389 00:28:31,761 --> 00:28:34,105 - He's got a gun. It's a gun. That's a gun. - He's virile. 390 00:28:34,263 --> 00:28:37,187 - Mr Knoll. - Call me Jack, son. How's my form? 391 00:28:39,018 --> 00:28:42,522 Pretty good. So, my brother dropped off a DVD... 392 00:28:42,813 --> 00:28:44,030 DVD. Haven't seen it yet. 393 00:28:44,148 --> 00:28:46,947 I thought you said that you were gonna watch it before your agent came over. 394 00:28:47,109 --> 00:28:50,363 Agent dropped me as a client. Said no one'll hire me. Fuck him. 395 00:28:50,571 --> 00:28:53,916 Should've fired him years ago. Got me up for grampa roles now. 396 00:28:53,991 --> 00:28:57,586 Come here. Look at this. Come here. Hit my ass. 397 00:28:58,371 --> 00:29:00,544 Frank, hit it. Really hit it. Hit my ass. 398 00:29:00,831 --> 00:29:02,674 - I am not hitting his ass. - Punch his fucking ass. 399 00:29:02,750 --> 00:29:04,252 Come on! Hit it hard! 400 00:29:05,127 --> 00:29:08,631 Yeah, damn right! Does that feel like a grampa ass to you? 401 00:29:08,714 --> 00:29:09,715 Not at all. 402 00:29:09,799 --> 00:29:12,177 That ass is harder than a dick on Viagra. 403 00:29:12,343 --> 00:29:15,472 But, no, I got an agent who says, "Take the grampa roles. 404 00:29:15,596 --> 00:29:17,143 - "They die at the end." - He's a lunatic. 405 00:29:17,223 --> 00:29:18,638 I don't wanna die. I don't wanna cry. I wanna fuck! 406 00:29:18,641 --> 00:29:20,314 We gotta get the DVD and get the fuck out of here. 407 00:29:20,393 --> 00:29:23,021 Bruce, we gotta do movies where there's lots of fucking! 408 00:29:23,145 --> 00:29:25,648 Don't worry, I can see it in your eyes, I'm fine. 409 00:29:26,482 --> 00:29:29,156 Watch this, motherfuckers! Where's my addiction, Bruce? 410 00:29:29,235 --> 00:29:31,658 - Way back there, Jack! - Can you see it, Bruce? 411 00:29:31,821 --> 00:29:35,746 - It's fucking way over there! - Fuck you, addiction. You cannot catch me! 412 00:29:35,908 --> 00:29:38,957 - I win! I win! I win! - YOu win! 413 00:29:41,289 --> 00:29:43,007 Come on! Let's watch your movie. 414 00:29:43,541 --> 00:29:44,542 Action! 415 00:29:44,875 --> 00:29:46,343 Hey, hey, watch it! 416 00:29:49,297 --> 00:29:50,844 - Make him turn it off. - I can't. He's enjoying it. 417 00:29:53,301 --> 00:29:54,678 Frank, you got talent! 418 00:29:55,303 --> 00:29:56,646 I can see it! 419 00:29:57,013 --> 00:29:58,390 Isn't the camera work good? 420 00:29:58,931 --> 00:30:00,558 Frank? 421 00:30:04,604 --> 00:30:06,606 - What are you doing? - Shit! 422 00:30:06,689 --> 00:30:08,157 What the fuck are you doing? 423 00:30:09,525 --> 00:30:11,027 What the fuck was that? 424 00:30:11,277 --> 00:30:12,824 - You didn't see that spark? - What? 425 00:30:12,903 --> 00:30:14,075 What are you doing here? 426 00:30:14,280 --> 00:30:15,577 That'll dry right out. 427 00:30:15,823 --> 00:30:17,120 What are you doing here? 428 00:30:17,325 --> 00:30:20,204 Frank? You know my daughter? 429 00:30:20,661 --> 00:30:21,662 She's your daughter? 430 00:30:21,746 --> 00:30:23,919 Dad, could you maybe put some clothes on? Maybe? 431 00:30:24,081 --> 00:30:25,799 - This is your dad? - Yeah. 432 00:30:26,709 --> 00:30:27,710 Hi. 433 00:30:28,961 --> 00:30:30,258 How do you know my Lassie? 434 00:30:30,671 --> 00:30:32,673 Rehab, from rehab. Last night. 435 00:30:32,757 --> 00:30:34,885 I was late. I was on my way to see you... 436 00:30:34,967 --> 00:30:36,810 - Yep, exactly. Exactly. - ...and I ran into him. 437 00:30:36,886 --> 00:30:41,312 - How do you know my father? - My brother was his roommate. 438 00:30:41,432 --> 00:30:43,150 Hey, in rehab. 439 00:30:43,225 --> 00:30:45,603 - Brother? The brother... - Yep. Mmm-That one. 440 00:30:45,895 --> 00:30:47,147 - I'm gonna finish my workout. - Okay. 441 00:30:47,229 --> 00:30:48,981 Then let's all have a calm breakfast inside. 442 00:30:49,065 --> 00:30:50,237 What a coincidence. 443 00:30:50,358 --> 00:30:51,826 He's an amazing man, your father. 444 00:30:52,068 --> 00:30:55,572 - Jack, don't forget the treadmill's on! - Shit! 445 00:31:04,872 --> 00:31:05,873 But I fell... 446 00:31:06,415 --> 00:31:08,133 What is wrong with you? 447 00:31:08,209 --> 00:31:10,257 People are not just wandering around, 448 00:31:10,336 --> 00:31:12,304 waiting for you to make movies about them, Bruce. 449 00:31:12,380 --> 00:31:16,226 This is a public place, Frankie. If they don't wanna be filmed, they shouldn't come here. 450 00:31:16,300 --> 00:31:17,768 Where are you going? Where are you taking me? 451 00:31:18,094 --> 00:31:21,644 - Going home, Dad. We're going home. - No, take me back in there! You're the doctor! 452 00:31:21,722 --> 00:31:24,692 - OxyContin! Just get me them, damn it! - He's an orderly. Will you just calm... 453 00:31:24,767 --> 00:31:26,394 - What's wrong? - He wants drugs. 454 00:31:26,477 --> 00:31:27,524 Jack! 455 00:31:27,603 --> 00:31:29,276 Come here, please. Please, listen to me, man. 456 00:31:29,355 --> 00:31:30,902 Look, lam in deep pain, man. 457 00:31:30,981 --> 00:31:34,611 - The doctor said I needed some painkillers. - The doctor said Advil was fine. 458 00:31:34,777 --> 00:31:37,246 - He told me OxyContin. - He did not say... 459 00:31:37,363 --> 00:31:39,707 He did not say OxyContin. He said OxyContin. 460 00:31:39,949 --> 00:31:40,950 Give me a Darvon. 461 00:31:41,117 --> 00:31:43,916 Okay, Jack, listen to me, drugs aren't your friend. I am your friend. 462 00:31:43,994 --> 00:31:46,543 And what I'm going to do, as your friend, I'm gonna take you to a meeting. 463 00:31:46,622 --> 00:31:48,295 Can I have your car keys? I'm gonna take him to a meeting. 464 00:31:50,626 --> 00:31:52,378 Make sure you get that DVD! 465 00:32:01,011 --> 00:32:03,184 Well, it's nice to see you again. 466 00:32:03,264 --> 00:32:06,643 Yeah, you really don't have to say that to me. 467 00:32:06,976 --> 00:32:08,068 What are you talking about? 468 00:32:08,144 --> 00:32:11,990 I mean, I knew you weren't going to call me, which is actually totally fine. So... 469 00:32:12,732 --> 00:32:17,784 I already did. Twice. Check your phone. 470 00:32:20,740 --> 00:32:25,496 I don't believe it. Look, Frank, I don't do what we did last night. 471 00:32:26,162 --> 00:32:31,009 Okay. And I know that lots of girls say that, but I really never, ever, ever do that stuff. 472 00:32:31,333 --> 00:32:32,585 Okay... 473 00:32:32,668 --> 00:32:35,888 And now it turns out that you know my father, who I want to kill, 474 00:32:36,005 --> 00:32:40,932 and anytime I get sucked back into his whole crazy world, 475 00:32:41,010 --> 00:32:43,058 it ends very, very badly. So... 476 00:32:47,391 --> 00:32:50,190 Lassie, I actually don't know your dad. 477 00:32:50,269 --> 00:32:54,866 But I do know what it's like to want to kill a relative. 478 00:32:54,940 --> 00:32:59,286 Hey, look, I'm not trying to suck you into anything, 479 00:33:00,404 --> 00:33:05,706 I'd just really love go out on, like, a regular date with you. You know? 480 00:33:06,660 --> 00:33:11,257 We could see a movie. Maybe get something to eat that isn't part of your underwear. 481 00:33:19,632 --> 00:33:23,478 Hi, everyone. My name is Jack, and I'm an alcoholic and a drug addict. 482 00:33:24,094 --> 00:33:25,346 Hi, Jack. 483 00:33:25,471 --> 00:33:31,319 Drugs and alcohol cost me my career as a movie star. 484 00:33:31,727 --> 00:33:36,483 And I only say that up in case any of you doubt that this disease can take away 485 00:33:36,565 --> 00:33:38,317 the things that you love most. 486 00:33:40,653 --> 00:33:43,907 That's what happened to me. Just one more thing. 487 00:33:44,323 --> 00:33:47,623 If any of you ladies wanted to have sex with me back when I was a somebody 488 00:33:47,701 --> 00:33:51,251 and didn't get a chance, meet me out back. I also have a pool. 489 00:34:02,258 --> 00:34:04,226 Have you ever worked at a strip club? 490 00:34:04,301 --> 00:34:05,598 - Bruce? - Yeah. 491 00:34:05,678 --> 00:34:08,272 - Hi. My name's David. - Hi. 492 00:34:08,389 --> 00:34:10,232 - This is my wife, Natalie. - Hello. 493 00:34:10,349 --> 00:34:13,774 We related to everything you said in the meeting. 494 00:34:13,894 --> 00:34:15,817 We wanted to be in the movie business our whole lives. 495 00:34:15,938 --> 00:34:21,536 And when we got sober, we swore we'd finally do what we were supposed to do. 496 00:34:22,111 --> 00:34:24,113 That's why we started our company. 497 00:34:24,196 --> 00:34:28,997 - Los Angeles Pictures. - Los Angeles. "Angels." 498 00:34:30,744 --> 00:34:32,462 Did you know that angels are everywhere? 499 00:34:32,788 --> 00:34:35,962 - I did not know that, David. - There's one standing next to you. 500 00:34:37,376 --> 00:34:39,799 Don't be afraid. That's Sonya. She follows us. 501 00:34:42,715 --> 00:34:45,434 Did you come with Jack Knoll? Are you friends? 502 00:34:46,552 --> 00:34:48,475 Jack? Yeah. Big time, good friend. 503 00:34:48,637 --> 00:34:50,184 No, hit it, hit it, hit it. 504 00:34:50,347 --> 00:34:54,818 Do you think that you and Jack would be interested in making movies with us 505 00:34:54,935 --> 00:34:55,982 about angels? 506 00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,773 Thanks to dentistry, we have plenty of money. 507 00:35:00,482 --> 00:35:02,655 You guys are like Christian tooth fairies. 508 00:35:04,653 --> 00:35:05,745 That's amazing. 509 00:35:05,821 --> 00:35:07,698 We're ready to go. 510 00:35:07,781 --> 00:35:11,081 We're just looking for like-minded artists to join us. 511 00:35:11,243 --> 00:35:12,665 You know what's weird? 512 00:35:12,745 --> 00:35:17,842 Jack, only yesterday, was talking about how much he loves angels. 513 00:35:19,043 --> 00:35:20,215 My God. 514 00:35:21,378 --> 00:35:23,597 - It's a miracle. - It's a miracle. 515 00:35:23,672 --> 00:35:26,266 So, how much money do you guys have? 516 00:35:27,176 --> 00:35:28,849 - We have a lot. - Shh. 517 00:35:30,721 --> 00:35:31,768 Should we pray? 518 00:35:31,847 --> 00:35:33,190 - Let's! - Let's pray. 519 00:35:48,739 --> 00:35:52,243 - Whoa. Whoa, whoa, Claudia... - Shhh. 520 00:35:53,535 --> 00:35:55,629 Be very quiet. 521 00:35:58,457 --> 00:35:59,800 Help! Mom! 522 00:35:59,917 --> 00:36:01,339 Shut the fuck up! 523 00:36:01,877 --> 00:36:03,720 Okay. Okay. Just do it. 524 00:36:09,218 --> 00:36:11,141 - Hey, bro. - Where you been? 525 00:36:11,220 --> 00:36:12,972 Well, Jack and I went to a meeting. 526 00:36:13,055 --> 00:36:15,854 After which I was approached by some very serious film producers. 527 00:36:15,933 --> 00:36:17,856 I need my keys. I'm late to meet Lassie. 528 00:36:17,935 --> 00:36:20,905 - Okay. Have a good time. - You got the DVD, right'? 529 00:36:20,980 --> 00:36:22,982 Weren't you supposed to get the DVD? 530 00:36:25,317 --> 00:36:26,660 How do you know he's not home? 531 00:36:26,735 --> 00:36:29,488 He stayed for another meeting. So, where are you going to take Lassie? 532 00:36:29,571 --> 00:36:32,074 Just get the DVD out of the player and stop talking. 533 00:36:32,157 --> 00:36:34,251 Why are you always so mean to me? 534 00:36:37,496 --> 00:36:38,998 - It's fucking gone. - Shh! 535 00:36:39,081 --> 00:36:40,549 He's sleeping. 536 00:36:41,417 --> 00:36:42,964 Fine. 537 00:36:44,253 --> 00:36:45,300 Where are you going? 538 00:36:45,587 --> 00:36:47,589 I'm going to get it. 539 00:36:52,261 --> 00:36:53,854 What if he has an alarm? 540 00:36:53,929 --> 00:36:56,899 You think he has an alarm? He has no furniture. 541 00:36:56,974 --> 00:36:59,193 But you think he's gonna pay for an alarm? 542 00:36:59,268 --> 00:37:01,191 Use your head, Frankie. 543 00:37:01,562 --> 00:37:03,564 I'm sorry! I'm not a goddamn criminal. 544 00:37:03,647 --> 00:37:07,151 Yeah, well, it's just as well, because you'd be a terrible one. 545 00:37:08,068 --> 00:37:10,196 Just, fuck... Bruce, the guy has guns. 546 00:37:10,279 --> 00:37:14,329 I know he has guns! And he will use them on us if he ever watches that video. 547 00:37:14,783 --> 00:37:16,126 So are you gonna help me get it back? 548 00:37:16,201 --> 00:37:18,750 Or are you gonna stand out here all night and whine like a little bitch? 549 00:37:18,829 --> 00:37:20,502 I'm a bitch'? I'm a bitch? 550 00:37:20,581 --> 00:37:23,710 Then how come you're the one always sucking Jack Knoll's balls? 551 00:37:23,792 --> 00:37:25,760 He's my friend! 552 00:37:28,213 --> 00:37:30,591 Holy shit. The pig is in the pool. 553 00:37:30,841 --> 00:37:33,390 The pig is in the pool? Fuck. 554 00:37:33,469 --> 00:37:34,595 He's fine. He's swimming. 555 00:37:35,429 --> 00:37:37,602 What're you talking about? Pigs can't swim! 556 00:37:38,223 --> 00:37:41,727 Jack shouldn't have kept a pig by the pool. It's irresponsible. It's not our fault. 557 00:37:41,810 --> 00:37:43,437 We are not leaving him in there. 558 00:37:43,645 --> 00:37:44,692 Fine. You go get him. 559 00:37:44,772 --> 00:37:46,695 You get him! I'm going on a date after this. 560 00:37:46,774 --> 00:37:48,117 - I can't swim. - What? 561 00:37:48,192 --> 00:37:51,696 I can't swim, Frankie. I never have. I don't like water. 562 00:37:51,779 --> 00:37:53,247 I can't even drink the stuff. 563 00:37:53,781 --> 00:37:55,283 You fuck! 564 00:38:05,459 --> 00:38:07,882 I think he's dead. I think he's dead! 565 00:38:08,128 --> 00:38:10,005 - Heimlich him! - Heimlich him? 566 00:38:10,130 --> 00:38:12,758 Do it! Heimlich him! 567 00:38:12,841 --> 00:38:14,514 Squeeze his little belly. 568 00:38:22,601 --> 00:38:24,194 Is that a condom? 569 00:38:25,395 --> 00:38:26,692 Yeah, that's definitely a condom. 570 00:38:27,231 --> 00:38:28,904 Get it off. 571 00:38:29,108 --> 00:38:30,860 - Who the fuck is out here? - Jack, Jack! 572 00:38:31,068 --> 00:38:33,036 It's Bruce. Don't shoot! Don't shoot! 573 00:38:33,403 --> 00:38:35,531 - What are you doing here? - I was worried about you. 574 00:38:35,823 --> 00:38:37,291 Hey, Dharma D-Cup. 575 00:38:37,366 --> 00:38:40,495 And I thought it would be good if I could be here when you got home. 576 00:38:40,577 --> 00:38:44,127 And it's a good that we were, because your pig fell in the pool, man. 577 00:38:44,206 --> 00:38:45,799 - Is he all right? - He's fine. 578 00:38:45,874 --> 00:38:46,875 We saved him. 579 00:38:47,417 --> 00:38:48,669 Mr Knoll. 580 00:38:48,836 --> 00:38:53,262 Since we're already here, would you like us to get the DVD player fixed? 581 00:38:53,340 --> 00:38:54,887 That's a good idea, Frankie. 582 00:38:54,967 --> 00:38:56,389 Don't worry about it. 583 00:38:56,552 --> 00:38:59,305 My housekeeper took it home with her. Her husband fixes them. 584 00:39:27,291 --> 00:39:28,668 Hey, GUYS... 585 00:39:28,750 --> 00:39:31,344 We're looking for Ramon and Celia. 586 00:39:31,753 --> 00:39:33,096 They just left for now, bro. 587 00:39:34,298 --> 00:39:35,675 Right. Um... 588 00:39:35,757 --> 00:39:37,009 Do you know where they went? 589 00:39:37,092 --> 00:39:38,810 None of your business. 590 00:39:40,721 --> 00:39:42,644 You're done now? 591 00:39:42,723 --> 00:39:44,942 What's up, homes? Listen, 592 00:39:45,017 --> 00:39:48,863 Cecilia, the Chiquita who lives here, she works for a guy called Jack Knoll. 593 00:39:48,937 --> 00:39:53,443 You know Jack Knoll? He's a big TV actor. 594 00:39:53,525 --> 00:39:55,323 You don't have a TV. That's okay. 595 00:39:55,402 --> 00:39:57,996 Jack's a really good amigo of mine. 596 00:39:58,071 --> 00:40:01,371 And he sent me over to just grab something from... 597 00:40:01,450 --> 00:40:02,622 They just left. If want to come back a little... 598 00:40:02,701 --> 00:40:03,702 Maybe we'll just have a quick look inside. 599 00:40:03,785 --> 00:40:05,787 Maybe I'll just break your fucking legs if you take another step. 600 00:40:06,496 --> 00:40:07,748 You're gonna do it? 601 00:40:09,875 --> 00:40:11,548 Okay. You're a lot bigger standing up. 602 00:40:11,668 --> 00:40:14,171 - Sorry to disturb you. - Just get the fuck out of here. 603 00:40:14,254 --> 00:40:15,801 See that. 604 00:40:41,323 --> 00:40:43,246 I can see it. It's just here. 605 00:40:43,325 --> 00:40:44,417 My God. 606 00:40:48,330 --> 00:40:49,673 You have to do it. 607 00:40:49,748 --> 00:40:51,591 - What? - You have to go in. 608 00:40:52,793 --> 00:40:55,546 I swore on my sobriety that I wouldn't steal any more, Frank. 609 00:40:55,796 --> 00:40:59,221 And besides, breaking and entering a stranger's home is definitely a felony 610 00:40:59,299 --> 00:41:00,846 and I've already got two strikes. 611 00:41:00,926 --> 00:41:02,644 If you think you're going to manipulate me and... 612 00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:04,062 Fine. 613 00:41:04,388 --> 00:41:07,062 I'll go. I'll do it. It's fine. 614 00:41:07,891 --> 00:41:09,643 Bruce, neither of us should do it! 615 00:41:09,726 --> 00:41:12,821 Frank, if I get caught and go down for 3O years, 616 00:41:13,146 --> 00:41:14,318 will you do me a favour? 617 00:41:14,398 --> 00:41:16,947 Promise you won't put Mom in a nursing home. 618 00:41:19,903 --> 00:41:21,496 All right. Wait. Wait. 619 00:41:31,123 --> 00:41:32,420 - Stop pushing. - Okay. 620 00:41:39,673 --> 00:41:40,674 You Okay? 621 00:42:33,185 --> 00:42:34,186 What are you doing? 622 00:42:34,770 --> 00:42:35,942 He's attacking me. 623 00:42:36,021 --> 00:42:37,022 Shake him off! 624 00:42:37,481 --> 00:42:39,358 He's really strong! 625 00:42:39,441 --> 00:42:41,409 Frank, Frank! Stab him! 626 00:42:41,485 --> 00:42:43,408 - What? - Take this knife and stab him! 627 00:42:43,487 --> 00:42:45,034 I'm not fucking stabbing him, Bruce. 628 00:42:45,113 --> 00:42:46,911 He's, like, a million years old. It doesn't matter. 629 00:42:46,990 --> 00:42:49,288 Okay, just bring him over here. I'll stab him. 630 00:42:51,244 --> 00:42:52,996 He fucking bit me! 631 00:42:53,955 --> 00:42:54,956 Give me the DVD player! 632 00:42:59,920 --> 00:43:00,921 Good luck. 633 00:43:02,381 --> 00:43:04,429 Bruce! Bruce! 634 00:43:04,508 --> 00:43:05,509 What the fuck? 635 00:43:15,310 --> 00:43:18,063 It really took you 14 hours to get me out? 636 00:43:18,146 --> 00:43:20,740 When Bruce gets arrested, we always let him spend the night. 637 00:43:20,816 --> 00:43:23,160 Your mother and I decided we shouldn't play favourites. 638 00:43:24,152 --> 00:43:26,405 Bruce is a fucking criminal! 639 00:43:26,488 --> 00:43:27,910 Ex-criminal. 640 00:43:27,989 --> 00:43:30,333 And you are scarcely in any position to judge. 641 00:43:31,076 --> 00:43:32,077 Here. 642 00:43:41,670 --> 00:43:42,671 Stop sign! 643 00:44:02,441 --> 00:44:04,944 - Hello. - I am so sorry about last night. 644 00:44:05,026 --> 00:44:07,324 Don't even worry about it. Bruce called me. 645 00:44:07,404 --> 00:44:09,156 He told me all about your father's scare. 646 00:44:09,239 --> 00:44:10,832 Are they sure that it's not a heart attack? 647 00:44:11,825 --> 00:44:13,372 Yeah, he's... 648 00:44:14,870 --> 00:44:16,042 They said he's fine. 649 00:44:16,121 --> 00:44:17,122 Good. 650 00:44:17,289 --> 00:44:18,666 So... 651 00:44:19,082 --> 00:44:20,299 You want to get together later? 652 00:44:21,376 --> 00:44:23,094 Right, well... 653 00:44:24,004 --> 00:44:26,382 Frank, I just don't think that I have the time. 654 00:44:28,049 --> 00:44:30,393 Right. Okay. 655 00:44:30,927 --> 00:44:32,554 The relief organisation that I work for, 656 00:44:32,637 --> 00:44:35,356 they just offered me this position in China that I'm thinking about taking. 657 00:44:35,432 --> 00:44:38,060 So, it's just kinda crazy right now. 658 00:44:39,436 --> 00:44:43,657 But if I'm ever in Death Valley, then, you know, I'll absolutely give you a call. 659 00:44:44,649 --> 00:44:46,026 Okay... 660 00:44:47,736 --> 00:44:49,989 Okay. Have a safe trip. 661 00:44:58,246 --> 00:44:59,463 Fuck. 662 00:45:02,250 --> 00:45:04,548 Hey, bro. I got it. 663 00:45:04,628 --> 00:45:05,971 All broken up. 664 00:45:08,590 --> 00:45:11,309 I also got all the tape. That's for you as well. 665 00:45:12,093 --> 00:45:14,687 And don't worry. Jack's maid isn't going to press charges. 666 00:45:16,806 --> 00:45:18,023 Are you okay, bro? 667 00:45:18,099 --> 00:45:19,897 Did someone touch you in prison? 668 00:45:22,729 --> 00:45:24,151 Have my car keys? 669 00:45:27,150 --> 00:45:29,699 Look at me and tell me you don't have any more copies. 670 00:45:32,489 --> 00:45:35,789 I swear, on my sobriety, 671 00:45:36,451 --> 00:45:38,453 that I don't have any more copies. 672 00:45:48,547 --> 00:45:50,470 Now swear that no one else has any. 673 00:45:54,302 --> 00:45:58,398 Okay, since your impotence is apparently so embarrassing to you, 674 00:45:58,473 --> 00:46:01,773 I had Claudia completely re-edit my movie. 675 00:46:01,851 --> 00:46:04,604 Which means, technically, I don't even have to show it to you. 676 00:46:05,063 --> 00:46:08,192 Because as you will soon see, this movie no longer has anything to do with you. 677 00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:11,825 But I'm happy for you to see it because you're my brother and I love you. 678 00:46:12,571 --> 00:46:13,993 Claudia, play it for him. 679 00:46:14,155 --> 00:46:16,499 Well, what you're about to see, in my opinion, 680 00:46:16,575 --> 00:46:20,250 is a serious step back from the integrity of Bruce's original work. 681 00:46:20,328 --> 00:46:21,420 Could you just press play, please? 682 00:46:21,496 --> 00:46:24,090 Okay, will you just stop yelling at me, please? 683 00:46:24,165 --> 00:46:25,633 - I'm not even yelling at you. - You're being rude. 684 00:46:25,709 --> 00:46:27,086 Just play it. 685 00:46:39,556 --> 00:46:40,682 - What's wrong? - What? 686 00:46:40,765 --> 00:46:42,062 - What's wrong? - What? 687 00:46:42,142 --> 00:46:44,611 You're not hard. What's wrong? Am I doing something wrong? 688 00:46:44,686 --> 00:46:46,859 No, no, no. We just started. 689 00:46:49,357 --> 00:46:50,779 - Actually, Lassie. - Yeah? 690 00:46:50,859 --> 00:46:52,031 You're kind of squeezing. 691 00:46:52,235 --> 00:46:55,910 I originally planned to put fuzz face on the genitals. 692 00:46:55,989 --> 00:46:59,163 But it's actually a lot funnier with genitals. 693 00:46:59,242 --> 00:47:02,462 Especially since you were having so much trouble with your genitals. 694 00:47:02,621 --> 00:47:04,123 I'm sorry. Who the fuck are you? 695 00:47:04,205 --> 00:47:06,708 This is Arthur. Arthur, this is Frank. 696 00:47:06,791 --> 00:47:09,590 Arthur's a bigwig in the whole in the whole fuzz face game. 697 00:47:09,711 --> 00:47:11,964 And what exactly did you plan to do with this? 698 00:47:12,047 --> 00:47:14,596 It's going to be submitted it to a sex-tape site in the valley. 699 00:47:14,716 --> 00:47:17,265 It's a do-it-yourself fornication and lighting emporium, called. 700 00:47:17,344 --> 00:47:19,722 ChooseALam pAndGo F uckEachOther. Com. 701 00:47:19,929 --> 00:47:21,055 Please get hard. 702 00:47:21,389 --> 00:47:23,983 Please get hard. Please get hard. Please get hard. 703 00:47:24,893 --> 00:47:26,270 Shit. 704 00:47:26,353 --> 00:47:28,321 Frank, you ungrateful little bitch. 705 00:47:28,396 --> 00:47:30,364 We did this so you wouldn't have to be embarrassed! 706 00:47:39,240 --> 00:47:41,834 Hey, idiots. I uploaded it without the fuzz face. 707 00:47:41,910 --> 00:47:44,163 Now your film is going to be seen the way it was meant to be seen. 708 00:47:46,748 --> 00:47:47,920 What? 709 00:47:48,917 --> 00:47:50,760 Are you into lesbians? 710 00:47:50,835 --> 00:47:52,382 That's a thing with guys, right? 711 00:47:52,629 --> 00:47:54,256 The girl is Jack Knoll's daughter! 712 00:47:54,339 --> 00:47:55,761 Great art hurts, Bruce. 713 00:47:56,257 --> 00:48:00,182 Mmm... Boobs. I love your boobs. 714 00:48:05,600 --> 00:48:07,227 Do not honk my horn. 715 00:48:07,310 --> 00:48:08,311 Can you go around him? 716 00:48:10,605 --> 00:48:13,404 Look who's suddenly nervous about someone seeing the movie. 717 00:48:13,483 --> 00:48:15,861 Yes, I'm nervous about being killed! 718 00:48:15,944 --> 00:48:18,538 As soon as he sees that video, you don't think he's gonna kill you, too? 719 00:48:19,322 --> 00:48:21,416 I am nervous about being actually shot! 720 00:48:21,491 --> 00:48:23,914 Not about the possibility of maybe somebody on the Internet 721 00:48:23,993 --> 00:48:26,166 seeing my embarrassing weiner. 722 00:48:31,626 --> 00:48:33,253 No. Open hand! Open hand! 723 00:49:03,408 --> 00:49:05,331 - Hey. - Excuse me. 724 00:49:07,328 --> 00:49:09,376 Kip, Kip, it's him, it's him. 725 00:49:11,166 --> 00:49:12,543 Your video was dope, dawg. 726 00:49:12,625 --> 00:49:13,842 I'm the director. 727 00:49:14,377 --> 00:49:16,755 The most original sex tape ever. 728 00:49:16,838 --> 00:49:18,010 Shut your mouth. 729 00:49:18,423 --> 00:49:19,424 We'd like it back. 730 00:49:19,507 --> 00:49:23,557 I mean, a sex tape with no sex. That is just genius. 731 00:49:23,636 --> 00:49:27,015 Yeah, it was great. The thing is, it was actually sent to you by mistake. 732 00:49:27,098 --> 00:49:29,317 So, we're really gonna need you to destroy it. 733 00:49:29,392 --> 00:49:31,895 I can't do that. Once it goes up, it's up for 72 hours. 734 00:49:32,020 --> 00:49:34,364 Wait, wait, wait. You're saying it's on the Internet now? 735 00:49:34,564 --> 00:49:36,817 Come, check it out. You got some great feedback, dawg. 736 00:49:37,150 --> 00:49:38,117 Come on, man. Take a look here. 737 00:49:38,193 --> 00:49:41,697 Dad! Cut it with the welding, man. Come on! 738 00:49:41,905 --> 00:49:44,033 - Are these all for me? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. See? 739 00:49:44,115 --> 00:49:46,493 Here's the deal, either take it down right now, or... 740 00:49:46,576 --> 00:49:48,544 - ls five boners good? - Five boners is great. 741 00:49:48,703 --> 00:49:50,956 - That's five out of five. - Five out of five boners. 742 00:49:51,039 --> 00:49:52,256 And they're really stingy with boners. 743 00:49:52,332 --> 00:49:55,632 Yeah, they don't give boners for anybody. Dad! We have customers! 744 00:49:55,710 --> 00:49:57,963 - Hey, pal, pal, you wanna negotiate? - No, I don't. 745 00:49:58,046 --> 00:50:00,014 They call me Alfred Bitchcock. 746 00:50:00,757 --> 00:50:03,306 That's hilarious. I don't know what that means, though. 747 00:50:03,384 --> 00:50:05,102 - You want a car? - I don't want a car. 748 00:50:05,178 --> 00:50:06,475 I got a '93 Honda right outside. 749 00:50:06,554 --> 00:50:08,397 I have a DUI and I drive a Vespa. 750 00:50:08,515 --> 00:50:10,643 "Kinky In Kualalumpa" thinks that I'm a visionary. 751 00:50:10,725 --> 00:50:14,104 If other men are on our site and they see a guy like you 752 00:50:14,187 --> 00:50:18,237 having trouble getting an erection, keeping an erection, forming an erection... 753 00:50:18,316 --> 00:50:19,317 Right. 754 00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:21,402 I think that they'll feel a lot better about themselves. 755 00:50:21,528 --> 00:50:23,155 I don't want to be too forward, 756 00:50:23,238 --> 00:50:25,332 but would you like to maybe get some coffee or something later? 757 00:50:25,406 --> 00:50:26,783 - Anytime. - That'd be great. 758 00:50:26,866 --> 00:50:29,210 Like, wait, did you mean romantically? 759 00:50:29,285 --> 00:50:31,253 Most certainly romantically. 760 00:50:31,371 --> 00:50:33,169 - Bruce, can we leave, please? - Sure. 761 00:50:33,790 --> 00:50:35,133 All right. Hey, send us more stuff. 762 00:50:35,208 --> 00:50:37,552 Seriously, guys, you cannot fucking mess with people's lives like this. 763 00:50:37,627 --> 00:50:38,970 I really appreciate your support. 764 00:50:39,045 --> 00:50:41,594 You will take this down, or you will face the fucking consequences. 765 00:50:41,673 --> 00:50:43,266 I will call you, okay? About this. 766 00:50:44,092 --> 00:50:45,514 Did you think I didn'tjust see that? 767 00:50:45,593 --> 00:50:49,598 You heard the guy. They've only got, like, 15,000 subscribers tops. 768 00:50:49,681 --> 00:50:52,935 Mostly in Asia. And he's going to take it down in 72 hours. 769 00:50:53,017 --> 00:50:55,111 I am not waiting 72 hours. 770 00:50:55,770 --> 00:50:58,273 Why are you so embarrassed about your impotency'? 771 00:50:58,690 --> 00:51:01,284 I don't have impotency! 772 00:51:02,652 --> 00:51:04,871 I had a brief one-time-only episode. 773 00:51:04,946 --> 00:51:08,450 It happens to everyone. I was impotent last night. 774 00:51:09,117 --> 00:51:11,916 I know. I was. I mean, I had just watched your video. 775 00:51:11,995 --> 00:51:15,875 So, it was probably just some kind of fraternal sympathy softie. But even so... 776 00:51:15,957 --> 00:51:18,551 Claudia had to put three fingers up my ass last night to get me hard. 777 00:51:18,626 --> 00:51:21,129 I understand your pain. Family. 778 00:51:21,212 --> 00:51:24,933 Hey. David! No this is a good time. I've just come from church. 779 00:51:35,310 --> 00:51:36,562 Do you want me to hum? 780 00:51:36,644 --> 00:51:38,237 It's just my jaw hurts. 781 00:51:38,313 --> 00:51:39,815 Mother of God... 782 00:51:40,189 --> 00:51:41,236 Okay, Dad! That's enough. 783 00:51:41,316 --> 00:51:44,069 Well, that was excruciating. 784 00:51:44,152 --> 00:51:45,574 Just tell me you can get it down. 785 00:51:45,653 --> 00:51:47,701 This is out of our area of expertise. 786 00:51:47,780 --> 00:51:49,953 Although Sydney did just e-mail me 787 00:51:50,033 --> 00:51:52,582 that it is illegal to film someone in an unflattering manner 788 00:51:52,660 --> 00:51:53,752 without their knowledge. 789 00:51:53,828 --> 00:51:56,172 And that was definitely unflattering. 790 00:51:56,247 --> 00:51:57,248 - Dad! - What? 791 00:51:57,332 --> 00:51:58,549 Sydney, he's my partner. 792 00:51:58,625 --> 00:52:00,878 How am I supposed to help you if I don't know what's going on'? 793 00:52:01,502 --> 00:52:03,175 Listen, I think you should call Judge Collins, 794 00:52:03,254 --> 00:52:05,677 have him issue a take-down order. 795 00:52:05,757 --> 00:52:07,179 Here's his number. Thank you, dear. 796 00:52:09,677 --> 00:52:12,226 You gotta be kidding me! You showed the intern? 797 00:52:12,305 --> 00:52:14,307 Everything here is confidential! 798 00:52:20,813 --> 00:52:22,531 - They're dentists? - That's right. 799 00:52:22,607 --> 00:52:26,111 And they are super rich, Morn, and they wanna make a movie with Jack and I. 800 00:52:26,194 --> 00:52:28,242 - That's fantastic. - I know. 801 00:52:28,321 --> 00:52:29,994 I'd love to have you involved in some way. 802 00:52:30,073 --> 00:52:31,871 - Me? - Of course. 803 00:52:31,950 --> 00:52:34,703 It's been too long since you and I have created art together. 804 00:52:34,786 --> 00:52:36,584 When did you two ever make art together? 805 00:52:36,704 --> 00:52:38,456 My painting. 806 00:52:38,539 --> 00:52:40,337 Don't you remember I sat for that? 807 00:52:40,792 --> 00:52:41,793 Yes. 808 00:52:42,001 --> 00:52:46,097 Great things are happening. Sobriety has worked wonders with your life. 809 00:52:46,172 --> 00:52:48,140 Excuse me, am I invisible? 810 00:52:48,216 --> 00:52:51,436 Your beautiful sober son just put me in a porn video without my permission. 811 00:52:51,552 --> 00:52:53,805 Stop it. There is nothing in that video 812 00:52:53,888 --> 00:52:56,391 that earns it the title of porn and you know it. 813 00:52:57,100 --> 00:52:58,522 You watched it? 814 00:52:58,601 --> 00:53:00,478 - You showed it to Mom? - You showed it to Dad. 815 00:53:00,561 --> 00:53:02,234 To help get it down. 816 00:53:02,313 --> 00:53:03,656 Mom, why would you watch that? 817 00:53:03,731 --> 00:53:07,156 I watch all of Bruce's films. Besides, there is nothing wrong 818 00:53:07,235 --> 00:53:09,579 with a mother seeing her son's penis in repose. 819 00:53:09,654 --> 00:53:12,749 Had you gotten aroused, I would've stopped watching. 820 00:53:12,824 --> 00:53:14,826 Can we stop talking about this? 821 00:53:14,909 --> 00:53:19,415 I am seeing ajudge tomorrow and all of this is going to be behind us. 822 00:53:19,497 --> 00:53:20,840 Stop being such a drama queen. 823 00:53:20,915 --> 00:53:23,338 Mom, I'm on a website where people fuck fruit. 824 00:53:23,418 --> 00:53:25,637 It is not people. It is one man. And it's very funny. 825 00:53:25,712 --> 00:53:27,430 And don't talk with your mouth full. 826 00:53:27,505 --> 00:53:29,974 My God. Please be poison. 827 00:53:30,049 --> 00:53:31,517 When did he become such a prude? 828 00:53:31,592 --> 00:53:34,471 You know, I hate to say it, but I think I agree with her on this one. 829 00:53:34,554 --> 00:53:37,103 What was the point of your mother and I having sex with the door open 830 00:53:37,181 --> 00:53:39,684 if we were raising a puritan? 831 00:53:39,767 --> 00:53:41,360 - Dad. - Thank you, my darling. 832 00:53:44,439 --> 00:53:45,531 May I be excused? 833 00:53:45,606 --> 00:53:47,779 Look who's finally being polite. 834 00:53:48,276 --> 00:53:51,280 You know, some nights I really miss the sound of you guys making love. 835 00:53:51,571 --> 00:53:52,948 Yeah. Me, too. 836 00:53:53,823 --> 00:53:55,825 I'm so sorry. I didn't know who else to call. 837 00:53:56,242 --> 00:53:57,960 What is going on? 838 00:53:58,077 --> 00:54:01,331 I swear to God, if you fire one more shot, I'll fucking kill you. 839 00:54:01,414 --> 00:54:03,291 My fiancé! 840 00:54:03,875 --> 00:54:07,880 My fiancé called him and told him everything. I have no idea what he was thinking. 841 00:54:07,962 --> 00:54:11,057 So, of course, my dad just totally flips out and he goes to grab his gun. 842 00:54:11,132 --> 00:54:12,884 So I just locked him in there, in the shed. 843 00:54:13,009 --> 00:54:16,513 And is this his normal reaction to a situation like this? 844 00:54:16,804 --> 00:54:20,434 He's freakishly protective of me, in his own weird way. 845 00:54:20,516 --> 00:54:24,316 - Jack! Hey, buddy, it's Bruce. - Stay out of this. 846 00:54:24,729 --> 00:54:28,859 I'm gonna open the door, but you have to give me your gun. 847 00:54:28,941 --> 00:54:30,238 - No. - The thing is, Jack, 848 00:54:30,318 --> 00:54:33,197 it's really not cool to shoot people any more. 849 00:54:34,030 --> 00:54:37,034 It's illegal. Besides, I've got really good news. 850 00:54:37,116 --> 00:54:38,663 What news? 851 00:54:38,993 --> 00:54:41,337 I am opening the door. 852 00:54:44,832 --> 00:54:46,254 Gimme the gun. 853 00:54:47,043 --> 00:54:48,886 - What's the news? - I got us producers. 854 00:54:48,961 --> 00:54:50,213 - Really? - Yeah! 855 00:54:50,296 --> 00:54:52,219 You know, why don't you just take drugs? Just take drugs again. 856 00:54:53,174 --> 00:54:55,768 - Why would you say that? - Because you are just as bad... 857 00:54:55,843 --> 00:54:57,561 You're worse, actually, when you're sober. 858 00:54:57,637 --> 00:55:01,608 So, please, I am begging you to take drugs, Jack. 859 00:55:01,682 --> 00:55:07,109 First of all, I don't think you should be calling me "Jack." 860 00:55:07,188 --> 00:55:09,566 I think you should call me "Dad." 861 00:55:14,737 --> 00:55:16,239 Hey. 862 00:55:16,906 --> 00:55:18,328 Hi. 863 00:55:20,493 --> 00:55:22,587 You Okay? 864 00:55:31,379 --> 00:55:32,471 Are you sure you're okay? 865 00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:46,944 Sorry, if I'm giving you mixed messages. 866 00:55:48,521 --> 00:55:54,278 I don't really think that it takes a genius to figure out why I'm a little bit confused. 867 00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,624 I think we're all a little bit confused. 868 00:56:00,241 --> 00:56:02,664 Thanks for being a good guy. 869 00:56:03,077 --> 00:56:04,124 I'm really not. 870 00:56:04,203 --> 00:56:06,376 No. You really are. 871 00:56:09,625 --> 00:56:11,969 What do you mean, the judge thinks we should leave it up'? 872 00:56:12,044 --> 00:56:15,765 Well, apparently, these gossip websites bribe clerks to alert them 873 00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:18,889 when people get down sex tapes, in case there's a celebrity involved. 874 00:56:18,968 --> 00:56:21,847 Anyway, Lassie's a celebrity's kid, and there's only 48 hours left, 875 00:56:21,929 --> 00:56:25,024 so the judge thinks it's just not worth the risk. 876 00:56:25,099 --> 00:56:27,602 Okay, you know what? Fuck it. 877 00:56:27,685 --> 00:56:29,028 Can I borrow one of Dad's ties? 878 00:56:29,103 --> 00:56:31,105 I got my meeting with the producers and I want to look fancy. 879 00:56:31,272 --> 00:56:32,364 Aw, of course you can. 880 00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:34,192 - Where are you going? - I'm doing what I should've done 881 00:56:34,275 --> 00:56:36,528 from the very beginning. I'm telling Lassie. 882 00:56:36,611 --> 00:56:38,739 - Why? - The judge can't get down the sex tape. 883 00:56:39,113 --> 00:56:40,581 What? No! Wait, wait, wait. 884 00:56:40,656 --> 00:56:41,703 I'm not asking your permission. 885 00:56:41,782 --> 00:56:43,455 No. I told you, man. She's never gonna see it. 886 00:56:43,576 --> 00:56:46,250 I'm telling Lassie and I'm going home. 887 00:56:47,747 --> 00:56:49,966 Can you believe that pussy came from your pussy? 888 00:56:50,416 --> 00:56:52,669 What about Phil? Maybe he can help. 889 00:56:52,752 --> 00:56:54,800 - FATHERI Who's Phil? - Phil. 890 00:56:55,922 --> 00:56:57,640 I love you, Mom. 891 00:56:59,133 --> 00:57:00,931 His cell mate from prison. 892 00:57:01,010 --> 00:57:02,637 The guy who eats rats? 893 00:57:02,720 --> 00:57:04,063 Don't be so negative! 894 00:57:04,138 --> 00:57:06,061 He hacked into a bank and got $20 million. 895 00:57:06,140 --> 00:57:08,063 He's not just some guy that eats rats. 896 00:57:08,142 --> 00:57:11,066 Hey, Phil! It's Bruce. Long time, man. 897 00:57:11,145 --> 00:57:13,443 I'm actually just calling because I need a favour. 898 00:57:13,522 --> 00:57:16,025 He's talking to his friend, the ex-con. He eats rats. 899 00:57:16,108 --> 00:57:17,826 Don't tell Mother I told you. 900 00:57:17,944 --> 00:57:19,787 Yeah, so is it okay if I send over my brother? 901 00:57:20,071 --> 00:57:21,698 What? I'm not going! 902 00:57:21,781 --> 00:57:24,330 He's a computer whiz! He can get the sex tape off the Internet. 903 00:57:24,408 --> 00:57:26,502 He's a rodent-eating ex-convict I don't know. 904 00:57:26,577 --> 00:57:27,703 Hey, we're both coming. 905 00:57:33,042 --> 00:57:35,261 Hello? 906 00:57:39,840 --> 00:57:42,218 Hello? Phil? 907 00:57:43,552 --> 00:57:44,929 Hi. 908 00:57:47,056 --> 00:57:48,182 Is Phil here? 909 00:57:52,436 --> 00:57:54,029 Hello, Bruce. 910 00:57:54,647 --> 00:57:55,694 Phil? 911 00:57:58,484 --> 00:57:59,861 It's Phyllis now. 912 00:58:00,361 --> 00:58:03,114 My God. That's weird. 913 00:58:04,699 --> 00:58:08,078 I'd like to introduce you to Frankie. 914 00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:10,379 The brother. 915 00:58:10,454 --> 00:58:11,706 Charmed. 916 00:58:13,624 --> 00:58:15,626 Kiss the hand. 917 00:58:23,551 --> 00:58:25,519 Come in, boys. 918 00:58:37,481 --> 00:58:40,155 No. I'm clean as a whistle. 919 00:58:40,234 --> 00:58:42,077 I'm impressed. 920 00:58:52,496 --> 00:58:53,713 No thanks. 921 00:58:54,957 --> 00:58:58,177 It's not nice to make a lady party alone. 922 00:58:58,252 --> 00:59:01,051 Especially when she's doing you a favour. 923 00:59:02,340 --> 00:59:03,341 Right. 924 00:59:04,133 --> 00:59:08,104 So, Phil, do you think, maybe, we could get this movie down off the Internet? 925 00:59:08,179 --> 00:59:10,307 - It's Phyllis. - Yes, it is. 926 00:59:11,265 --> 00:59:15,645 I get so horny when I smoke pot. You, too? 927 00:59:20,524 --> 00:59:23,778 You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, 928 00:59:24,111 --> 00:59:26,409 but I found your film very healing. 929 00:59:28,282 --> 00:59:30,580 I've had a lot of sadness lately. 930 00:59:30,659 --> 00:59:33,037 A lot of new girls do. 931 00:59:33,120 --> 00:59:38,251 Grieving the lost phallus, it's normal. 932 00:59:38,459 --> 00:59:39,711 It's so normal. 933 00:59:39,794 --> 00:59:41,796 But I have to tell you. 934 00:59:42,797 --> 00:59:47,928 When I saw what happened to you last night, Good Lord, I didn't miss my cock one bit. 935 00:59:48,052 --> 00:59:50,896 Would you like to see it? 936 00:59:51,222 --> 00:59:52,940 My phallus. 937 00:59:53,974 --> 00:59:56,773 No, I asked if I could keep it. I keep it in ajar. 938 00:59:57,645 --> 00:59:59,113 Well, I mean, not all of it. 939 00:59:59,188 --> 01:00:02,283 I mean, some of it they had to use to reconstruct my vagina. 940 01:00:02,358 --> 01:00:04,736 It's an amazingly interesting procedure... 941 01:00:04,819 --> 01:00:08,494 You don't have to go into all of that for us, Phyllis. 942 01:00:10,950 --> 01:00:14,875 You be nice to your Auntie Phyllis, you little shit. 943 01:00:14,995 --> 01:00:20,047 No, no. Frankie didn't... Frankie would love to hear all about your penis operation. 944 01:00:20,167 --> 01:00:23,296 It's just, we're kind of in a hurry to get the video down. 945 01:00:25,339 --> 01:00:27,467 Why has no one asked to see them? 946 01:00:27,550 --> 01:00:29,097 Your tits? 947 01:00:29,343 --> 01:00:30,811 I'd fucking love to see your tits. 948 01:00:33,222 --> 01:00:35,190 And how 'bout you, Frankie? 949 01:00:36,559 --> 01:00:38,402 Fancy a peek? 950 01:00:44,692 --> 01:00:46,911 I will not help people who don't support me. 951 01:00:46,986 --> 01:00:48,112 What is your problem? 952 01:00:48,195 --> 01:00:49,913 - What did I do? - You hesitated! 953 01:00:50,114 --> 01:00:53,493 When someone offers to show you their tits, you don't hesitate, you look! 954 01:00:53,659 --> 01:00:56,629 Bruce, I don't even know this guy. Why should I look at his tits? 955 01:00:56,704 --> 01:00:59,298 Her! Motherfucker! 956 01:00:59,373 --> 01:01:01,250 I'm done helping you. 957 01:01:01,333 --> 01:01:02,639 - Bruce! - I'm not gonna be late for my meeting 958 01:01:02,710 --> 01:01:04,804 to watch you abuse my lady friends, Frank. 959 01:01:05,254 --> 01:01:06,346 Bruce, I'm sorry! 960 01:01:06,464 --> 01:01:07,681 Don't say it to me! 961 01:01:18,100 --> 01:01:21,274 Phyllis. It's me again. 962 01:01:40,789 --> 01:01:43,417 You're a very good dancer, Frank. 963 01:01:54,011 --> 01:01:59,017 Phyllis, I would really like to, 964 01:01:59,099 --> 01:02:03,570 but I'm actually seeing someone right now, and I'm kind of old-fashioned that way. 965 01:02:06,440 --> 01:02:08,693 Please don't be mad. 966 01:02:08,943 --> 01:02:11,446 She's a very lucky girl. 967 01:02:11,529 --> 01:02:14,874 So, do you think you could 968 01:02:16,450 --> 01:02:19,875 maybe help with the sex tape? 969 01:02:22,164 --> 01:02:23,962 Well, 970 01:02:25,626 --> 01:02:27,924 since you couldn't get it up, 971 01:02:28,295 --> 01:02:30,548 I may as well get it down. 972 01:02:35,761 --> 01:02:37,763 Let's see what we have here. 973 01:02:38,722 --> 01:02:40,816 I really appreciate it, Phyllis. 974 01:02:42,685 --> 01:02:44,107 You know, 975 01:02:45,813 --> 01:02:47,486 there is something you could help me with. 976 01:02:47,565 --> 01:02:48,987 Anything. 977 01:02:49,066 --> 01:02:53,822 I have this date tonight. And I really, really like this lady. 978 01:02:53,904 --> 01:02:57,329 I think I might be a lesbian. You don't have any problem with that, right? 979 01:02:57,491 --> 01:02:58,458 No. 980 01:02:58,534 --> 01:03:03,836 Well, I got waxed for the very first time, you know, down there. 981 01:03:06,709 --> 01:03:08,803 At the end of the day, I went with the Brazilian. 982 01:03:08,877 --> 01:03:11,801 And, God, I hope I didn't make a mistake. 983 01:03:11,880 --> 01:03:13,553 I just want everything to be pretty. 984 01:03:18,679 --> 01:03:21,979 Would you like... Would you like me to take a look? 985 01:03:25,185 --> 01:03:26,186 Would you? 986 01:03:26,520 --> 01:03:28,363 Y9K)... 987 01:03:28,439 --> 01:03:29,736 Okay... 988 01:03:41,118 --> 01:03:44,998 Lord, again we thank you so much 989 01:03:45,080 --> 01:03:47,674 for Jack and for Bruce. 990 01:03:47,750 --> 01:03:51,050 In your name we pray. Amen. 991 01:03:51,128 --> 01:03:52,175 - Amen. - Amen. 992 01:03:52,254 --> 01:03:53,881 Amen. Hallelujah. 993 01:03:53,964 --> 01:03:56,012 Good, good. 994 01:03:56,091 --> 01:03:57,684 Thank you, thank you. 995 01:03:58,385 --> 01:04:03,107 And we also wanted to talk to the two of you about... 996 01:04:05,309 --> 01:04:07,403 Sex. 997 01:04:09,396 --> 01:04:10,397 Huh? 998 01:04:10,648 --> 01:04:14,278 Well, you see, my wife and I, we're celibates. 999 01:04:14,652 --> 01:04:15,824 Shut up. 1000 01:04:15,903 --> 01:04:18,656 We've taken a lifelong vow of chastity. 1001 01:04:18,739 --> 01:04:19,740 My God. 1002 01:04:19,823 --> 01:04:23,327 We don't expect you to live a similar lifestyle. 1003 01:04:23,410 --> 01:04:25,629 - Dear, no. We never would. - No. 1004 01:04:25,704 --> 01:04:31,086 But we do feel very strongly about our films being "sex-free." 1005 01:04:33,253 --> 01:04:35,551 "Sexfree." Yes. 1006 01:04:35,631 --> 01:04:37,429 You want a film with no sex in it. 1007 01:04:37,508 --> 01:04:39,351 - Correct. - Yes. 1008 01:04:39,426 --> 01:04:43,602 - Lots of angels. Zero sex. - Is that going to be a problem? 1009 01:04:45,474 --> 01:04:47,476 - Maybe. - No. 1010 01:05:03,409 --> 01:05:04,410 Phyllis! 1011 01:05:07,121 --> 01:05:09,089 I love you, Phyllis. 1012 01:05:16,672 --> 01:05:21,428 Look at us. We're on regular date, like regular people. It's nice. 1013 01:05:21,510 --> 01:05:23,558 It's a miracle. 1014 01:05:23,637 --> 01:05:26,607 When do I get to read your book? Because I kind of want to. 1015 01:05:26,682 --> 01:05:30,186 I think probably never. I'm pretty sure it sucks. 1016 01:05:30,811 --> 01:05:34,657 I'm pretty sure it sucks, too. But I still want to read it. 1017 01:05:35,482 --> 01:05:37,860 I won't judge you. 1018 01:05:37,943 --> 01:05:39,160 Maybe the next one. 1019 01:05:40,904 --> 01:05:44,408 Excuse me? It's you. Love the video, dude. 1020 01:05:44,491 --> 01:05:45,788 Fuckin' hysterical. 1021 01:05:45,868 --> 01:05:47,165 It's all right. This happens all the time. 1022 01:05:47,244 --> 01:05:49,997 Seriously. It's the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. 1023 01:05:50,581 --> 01:05:52,754 You know it got, like, a million hits in three hours today? 1024 01:05:52,833 --> 01:05:55,928 Awesome. Fuck off. You know? Thanks. 1025 01:05:56,003 --> 01:05:59,257 My God, I don't know how you handle that shit. 1026 01:05:59,339 --> 01:06:00,636 Eat my bra! 1027 01:06:02,176 --> 01:06:03,473 Eat my bra! 1028 01:06:04,052 --> 01:06:05,053 What did he say? 1029 01:06:05,137 --> 01:06:07,265 I don't know. I don't think he was talking to us. 1030 01:06:14,188 --> 01:06:15,235 What? 1031 01:06:25,949 --> 01:06:29,123 We could act out your masturbation fantasies. 1032 01:06:29,203 --> 01:06:30,876 Maybe that would get you hard. 1033 01:06:31,371 --> 01:06:35,376 Someone must've pirated a copy off the original site before I shut it down. 1034 01:06:35,876 --> 01:06:40,723 Like, I'll be a cheerleader and you be the captain of the football team. 1035 01:06:41,131 --> 01:06:43,429 Maybe you just need some kind of encouragement. 1036 01:06:43,509 --> 01:06:47,013 I'll cheer you on, I'll cheer you on, I'll cheer you on. 1037 01:06:56,605 --> 01:07:00,576 Please get it down, Phyllis. I'll do whatever you want. 1038 01:07:00,651 --> 01:07:03,450 We can dance. I'll look at your penis. 1039 01:07:03,529 --> 01:07:05,247 - Frank! - Go get the jar. Does it open? 1040 01:07:05,322 --> 01:07:08,826 - I'll touch it. - Frank, Frank, Frank. I know how you feel. 1041 01:07:09,576 --> 01:07:14,582 You're embarrassed and you're ashamed 1042 01:07:14,665 --> 01:07:16,667 and you want to die. 1043 01:07:16,750 --> 01:07:20,004 It's the exact same way I felt when the guys on my high school team 1044 01:07:20,087 --> 01:07:23,808 walked into the locker room and I was dressed in a cheerleader's uniform. 1045 01:07:23,882 --> 01:07:27,477 But it was at that moment, I got a glimpse, for the first time, 1046 01:07:27,553 --> 01:07:29,351 of my true me. 1047 01:07:30,722 --> 01:07:33,817 And that is what I want for you, darling. 1048 01:07:36,061 --> 01:07:41,158 Let your humiliation set you free. 1049 01:07:43,235 --> 01:07:45,704 Come here, sad screw up. Come here. 1050 01:07:47,573 --> 01:07:50,247 That's a very nice shampoo you're wearing. 1051 01:07:50,826 --> 01:07:52,578 Now he'll never work with me. 1052 01:07:52,661 --> 01:07:56,006 Jack? Don't be silly. He adores you. 1053 01:07:56,164 --> 01:07:58,633 Mom, he tried to shoot a guy who cheated on his daughter. 1054 01:07:58,792 --> 01:08:00,260 I put her in a sex tape, 1055 01:08:00,335 --> 01:08:04,385 which has now been viewed by by eight million people since breakfast. 1056 01:08:04,464 --> 01:08:07,968 It's not a real sex tape. It's just a funny little movie. 1057 01:08:10,929 --> 01:08:12,226 - That's it. - What? 1058 01:08:12,306 --> 01:08:16,356 It's a movie. I'll just tell Jack that what I shot in the clubhouse 1059 01:08:16,435 --> 01:08:19,314 was a teaser for a larger film. 1060 01:08:19,771 --> 01:08:21,068 What's the film? 1061 01:08:21,148 --> 01:08:22,650 I'll work that out! It writes itself! 1062 01:08:28,739 --> 01:08:30,412 - Hi. - Hey. 1063 01:08:30,490 --> 01:08:32,413 I'm so glad that you called. 1064 01:08:32,492 --> 01:08:36,747 My dad is at a meeting, but I ordered us some dinner. 1065 01:08:36,830 --> 01:08:39,583 So, I hope you're hungry. 1066 01:08:45,130 --> 01:08:47,553 Here. Sit. 1067 01:08:47,633 --> 01:08:49,635 I actually have something to tell you. 1068 01:08:50,969 --> 01:08:54,439 It's kind of the reason why we're eating Chinese food. 1069 01:08:54,514 --> 01:08:55,857 You're going to China? 1070 01:08:58,602 --> 01:09:00,445 The opposite. I told them no. 1071 01:09:01,355 --> 01:09:04,199 It's just kind of the worst time for me to go. 1072 01:09:06,860 --> 01:09:09,204 It might have a tiny little bit to do with you. 1073 01:09:16,578 --> 01:09:18,751 You all right? 1074 01:09:21,166 --> 01:09:22,418 You do these? 1075 01:09:22,501 --> 01:09:24,845 I was really into knights when I was a kid. 1076 01:09:26,046 --> 01:09:28,390 "A strong kind man, dipped in metal." 1077 01:09:28,465 --> 01:09:32,641 Listen. It's actually a very normal fantasy for a girl whose father 1078 01:09:32,719 --> 01:09:35,643 has never been in a relationship ever. 1079 01:09:35,847 --> 01:09:41,729 You can connect the dots and see why perhaps I was in need of some chivalry. 1080 01:09:48,026 --> 01:09:50,529 So, what did you want to tell me? 1081 01:09:54,825 --> 01:09:55,951 I'll tell you later. 1082 01:10:24,980 --> 01:10:25,981 Hey. 1083 01:10:26,064 --> 01:10:30,444 Thank you for the date yesterday. It was really, really nice and normal. 1084 01:10:32,070 --> 01:10:34,038 Listen, Lassie. Can I talk to you about something? 1085 01:10:34,114 --> 01:10:35,866 I'm actuallyjust running into a meeting right now. 1086 01:10:35,949 --> 01:10:37,121 Can I give you a call back in a little bit? 1087 01:10:37,659 --> 01:10:40,538 And your brother, he stopped by and he took your car. 1088 01:10:40,620 --> 01:10:43,214 He said he needed to trade it for a crane or something, I don't know. 1089 01:10:43,290 --> 01:10:45,292 He said you'd understand. 1090 01:11:01,391 --> 01:11:03,143 Hey. Sorry I'm late. 1091 01:11:08,315 --> 01:11:09,487 - What's going on? - This is actually 1092 01:11:09,566 --> 01:11:12,945 a really fucking horrible time for this to be happening to me! 1093 01:11:13,028 --> 01:11:18,501 I just don't understand it, I don't understand why nobody will fuck me! 1094 01:11:41,598 --> 01:11:44,647 But everyone else has sex, why can't we? 1095 01:11:45,060 --> 01:11:46,061 "Why can't I?" 1096 01:11:46,812 --> 01:11:49,440 Everyone else has sex. Why can't I? 1097 01:11:49,523 --> 01:11:50,820 Behold. 1098 01:11:50,899 --> 01:11:56,406 I am an angel, sent by God, to make you pure. 1099 01:11:56,863 --> 01:11:59,036 Dad! I'm gonna need more wings. 1100 01:11:59,116 --> 01:12:00,459 - What'? - More wings. 1101 01:12:01,660 --> 01:12:03,082 - Bruce. - Cut, cut. 1102 01:12:04,371 --> 01:12:06,123 Isn't this fucking amazing? 1103 01:12:07,249 --> 01:12:09,752 - What is this? - I'm making a movie of that night. 1104 01:12:10,335 --> 01:12:12,087 - What night? - The night in the clubhouse, bro. 1105 01:12:14,214 --> 01:12:17,263 Okay. Everybody, places. We're going again. 1106 01:12:19,886 --> 01:12:22,014 No. Actually not places. 1107 01:12:22,097 --> 01:12:25,897 Could everyone just pack this stuff up and go home? I'm sorry. 1108 01:12:25,976 --> 01:12:27,444 Frankie, stop being such a girl. 1109 01:12:27,519 --> 01:12:29,317 Do not disrespect me in front of my crew. 1110 01:12:29,396 --> 01:12:31,899 Okay'? I will slap you down. I will fucking slap you down. 1111 01:12:31,982 --> 01:12:34,076 All I'm doing here is trying to make everyone else happy. 1112 01:12:34,151 --> 01:12:35,448 The producers want an angel, 1113 01:12:35,527 --> 01:12:37,029 Jack won't do the movie unless Dharma's in it. 1114 01:12:37,112 --> 01:12:38,534 Jack is in the movie? 1115 01:12:38,613 --> 01:12:40,741 Of course Jack's in the movie. Jack's the money! 1116 01:12:41,283 --> 01:12:43,786 But he won't do it unless Dharma's in it, who can't fucking act. 1117 01:12:44,077 --> 01:12:45,169 Stop fighting, both of you! 1118 01:12:45,245 --> 01:12:47,168 And I am doing all of this, bro, 1119 01:12:47,247 --> 01:12:50,626 just to make sure that you and Cassie don't get embarrassed. 1120 01:12:50,709 --> 01:12:51,835 - Bruce? - What? 1121 01:12:51,918 --> 01:12:53,386 Isn't Jack supposed to be in this scene? 1122 01:12:53,879 --> 01:12:56,632 Can everybody just stop talking to me? Please? 1123 01:12:56,923 --> 01:12:58,721 Okay. We're going again. 1124 01:12:58,800 --> 01:13:00,928 Last time. Rolling sound. 1125 01:13:01,136 --> 01:13:02,433 - Bruce! - Action. 1126 01:13:04,347 --> 01:13:06,691 Don't listen to the angel. 1127 01:13:06,766 --> 01:13:09,019 Have sex. Have sex now. 1128 01:13:09,102 --> 01:13:11,275 - Angrier! - Have it all the time! 1129 01:13:15,233 --> 01:13:16,610 Fuck. 1130 01:13:19,070 --> 01:13:20,572 What are you doing here? 1131 01:13:20,655 --> 01:13:22,657 Tell me that you didn't know that he filmed us that night! 1132 01:13:23,533 --> 01:13:25,752 I didn't. I swear to GOd, I didn't. 1133 01:13:25,827 --> 01:13:27,374 Well, did you know that it was on the Internet? 1134 01:13:27,454 --> 01:13:29,456 Cut! Places! We're going again. 1135 01:13:30,790 --> 01:13:31,791 My God. 1136 01:13:32,125 --> 01:13:33,126 Action. 1137 01:13:34,711 --> 01:13:37,806 Why won't anyone have sex with me? Wait... 1138 01:13:38,256 --> 01:13:40,179 Is that an angel? 1139 01:13:40,383 --> 01:13:44,183 I forbid the blood to enter your cock. 1140 01:13:44,262 --> 01:13:46,685 Rise, penis, rise! 1141 01:13:46,765 --> 01:13:48,893 Bruce, could you have her say "phallus" instead? 1142 01:13:48,975 --> 01:13:50,067 What is all of this? 1143 01:13:50,143 --> 01:13:52,237 Fill with blood! Fill that member! 1144 01:13:52,312 --> 01:13:56,533 Bruce is making a movie so that we won't have to be embarrassed. 1145 01:13:56,608 --> 01:13:57,951 What are you talking about? 1146 01:13:58,026 --> 01:14:01,405 Sex out of wedlock is wrong. 1147 01:14:01,488 --> 01:14:03,081 Get that member filled with pleasure! 1148 01:14:03,156 --> 01:14:06,626 - I forbid the blood to enter your cock. - Get it in that pussy. Go... 1149 01:14:06,826 --> 01:14:07,793 - Phallus! - Phallus. 1150 01:14:07,869 --> 01:14:09,086 - I forbid... - I'm the devil! 1151 01:14:09,162 --> 01:14:12,507 - ...the blood to enter your phallus. - I'm the devil. Fuck that pussy! 1152 01:14:12,707 --> 01:14:15,460 - You big penis. - Can you say "organ" instead? 1153 01:14:15,543 --> 01:14:17,796 Motherfucker! Come here! 1154 01:14:19,965 --> 01:14:22,184 Did you put my precious daughter in a porno video? 1155 01:14:22,259 --> 01:14:24,762 You are fucking dead, do you hear me? 1156 01:14:24,844 --> 01:14:25,845 Shit. 1157 01:14:26,137 --> 01:14:28,014 Time to die, motherfucker. 1158 01:14:31,476 --> 01:14:32,898 Bruce, Bruce. 1159 01:14:34,354 --> 01:14:35,856 Fuck. 1160 01:14:35,939 --> 01:14:37,691 - Okay. Okay. - Someone call an ambulance! 1161 01:14:37,774 --> 01:14:39,196 Call 911. Call 911! 1162 01:14:39,317 --> 01:14:40,864 - He shot me in my belly. - Okay. I know, bro. 1163 01:14:40,944 --> 01:14:43,288 I know. Just keep breathing, just keep breathing. 1164 01:14:43,363 --> 01:14:45,365 Just keep breathing. 1165 01:14:47,909 --> 01:14:49,502 I knew you loved me, bro. 1166 01:14:49,577 --> 01:14:52,456 You! When you grab me, go like this. You gotta really hold me. 1167 01:14:53,164 --> 01:14:55,212 - You want to go again, Jack? - Let's go! 1168 01:14:55,542 --> 01:14:57,215 He doesn't know anything. 1169 01:14:57,294 --> 01:14:58,887 He just thinks that he's playing the part of a father 1170 01:14:58,962 --> 01:15:02,182 who found out his daughter's in a sex video. It's fine. 1171 01:15:02,924 --> 01:15:05,302 - You're such a fucking asshole! - What? 1172 01:15:05,385 --> 01:15:06,932 "What?" What's the matter with you? 1173 01:15:07,012 --> 01:15:09,765 I just want an option in case we decide to go dark in the end, bro. 1174 01:15:09,848 --> 01:15:11,646 - Lassie, I'm sorry. Lassie. - Leave me alone. 1175 01:15:11,725 --> 01:15:13,147 - Lassie. - Leave me alone! 1176 01:15:15,895 --> 01:15:17,067 But it looked that realistic? 1177 01:16:30,553 --> 01:16:32,430 Mom, stop fucking calling. 1178 01:16:32,972 --> 01:16:34,690 It's not your mother. 1179 01:16:35,225 --> 01:16:38,195 Unfortunately, I can't bear children. 1180 01:16:39,521 --> 01:16:40,522 Whatever. 1181 01:16:40,939 --> 01:16:45,945 I saw Bruce's movie, along with, I don't know, a few million other people. 1182 01:16:46,027 --> 01:16:48,997 And what the fuck was he thinking, not letting me play the angel? 1183 01:16:49,072 --> 01:16:51,450 That woman was absolute dog shit. 1184 01:16:52,450 --> 01:16:54,168 So you still talk to that girl? 1185 01:16:54,911 --> 01:16:57,835 - She still mad at you? - She won't take my calls. 1186 01:16:58,706 --> 01:17:00,629 She hasn't responded to any of my e-mails. 1187 01:17:01,167 --> 01:17:03,966 Yeah, I heard through the grapevine that she's going away. 1188 01:17:04,754 --> 01:17:05,880 Poor thing. 1189 01:17:06,005 --> 01:17:07,507 - Where? - China. 1190 01:17:09,008 --> 01:17:10,430 You think you're embarrassed? 1191 01:17:10,510 --> 01:17:13,980 Try having half the planet watch some guy not be able to fuck you all night. 1192 01:17:14,931 --> 01:17:16,933 That's embarrassing, my friend. 1193 01:17:18,893 --> 01:17:22,022 Anyway, I thought you should know she's going away. 1194 01:17:22,105 --> 01:17:25,325 Just in case one of the people on this phone call 1195 01:17:25,400 --> 01:17:27,368 wanted to start acting like a man, darling. 1196 01:17:29,529 --> 01:17:32,703 Let your Auntie Phyllis give you a piece of advice, Frankie, baby. 1197 01:17:33,575 --> 01:17:37,625 I don't give a shit how many people saw what happened in that clubhouse that night. 1198 01:17:37,704 --> 01:17:39,923 And I don't care what they thought about it. 1199 01:17:39,998 --> 01:17:42,717 They weren't there. They were just watching. 1200 01:17:45,211 --> 01:17:48,431 If you really fell in love with that girl that night, 1201 01:17:49,591 --> 01:17:52,515 then what the fuck are you still doing in the desert? 1202 01:18:10,570 --> 01:18:11,742 Francis. 1203 01:18:15,742 --> 01:18:16,743 Hey, bro. 1204 01:18:22,624 --> 01:18:26,504 Listen, I know we haven't talked since the whole angel debacle, 1205 01:18:26,586 --> 01:18:28,429 and I just wanted to say I'm really sorry. 1206 01:18:29,130 --> 01:18:32,634 After you left, I got to thinking, maybe I'm incapable of change. 1207 01:18:33,009 --> 01:18:34,181 But, look, no camera. 1208 01:18:35,053 --> 01:18:37,021 - Well, I'm impressed. - Right? 1209 01:18:37,388 --> 01:18:39,482 - You proud of me? - What time's her flight? 1210 01:18:39,891 --> 01:18:43,191 7:00 p.m. We better hit the road before we lose the light. 1211 01:18:47,815 --> 01:18:49,613 Hey, Bruce, can you help me with something in here? 1212 01:18:49,692 --> 01:18:51,285 Sure. 1213 01:18:53,947 --> 01:18:55,790 - You need a strong guy? - Yeah. 1214 01:18:59,661 --> 01:19:01,880 Frank! What're you doing? 1215 01:19:01,955 --> 01:19:03,298 You're not filming this, Bruce. 1216 01:19:04,123 --> 01:19:05,124 What? 1217 01:19:05,792 --> 01:19:07,385 Plenty of food and water in there. 1218 01:19:07,460 --> 01:19:09,633 There's even a mirror in case you want to jerk off. 1219 01:19:10,672 --> 01:19:12,549 TV gets Channel 6. 1220 01:19:12,632 --> 01:19:15,476 I swear on Mom's tits, I'm not gonna film you. 1221 01:19:16,803 --> 01:19:18,305 Okay, maybe one shot. 1222 01:19:19,138 --> 01:19:20,981 Maybe two. 1223 01:19:21,808 --> 01:19:24,937 A master from far away! Bro! 1224 01:19:25,019 --> 01:19:27,568 I just want to give you a happy ending. 1225 01:19:30,650 --> 01:19:34,029 Frank! I love you. 1226 01:20:03,850 --> 01:20:06,945 - Hey. - Dad! Tell us when people come in! 1227 01:20:10,940 --> 01:20:12,487 Excuse me? 1228 01:20:36,382 --> 01:20:39,727 I am a strong, kind man dipped in metal. 1229 01:20:40,219 --> 01:20:41,687 Dipped in metal. 1230 01:20:43,890 --> 01:20:46,518 And I have come to take you away from all of this. 1231 01:20:47,393 --> 01:20:50,863 And to protect you and to defend you. 1232 01:20:51,481 --> 01:20:54,234 And to apologise for sucking at it so far. 1233 01:20:55,610 --> 01:20:57,829 Lassie, I know all about embarrassment. 1234 01:20:57,904 --> 01:21:01,158 Eighteen million people saw me throw up on my fiancée. 1235 01:21:01,824 --> 01:21:04,748 And 35 million people saw my dick not work. 1236 01:21:05,453 --> 01:21:08,582 I'm standing in front of you wearing a car. 1237 01:21:09,415 --> 01:21:11,838 Don't go. It won't help. 1238 01:21:16,130 --> 01:21:17,473 Frank. 1239 01:21:19,592 --> 01:21:23,893 I really appreciate all of this effort, I just... 1240 01:21:27,183 --> 01:21:31,029 I can't live here an more. I have to o. Y 1241 01:21:33,856 --> 01:21:35,449 I'm sorry. 1242 01:22:06,472 --> 01:22:07,519 Come? 1243 01:22:09,517 --> 01:22:11,690 Come and visit me. 1244 01:22:12,145 --> 01:22:14,273 I could probably use a knight. 1245 01:22:20,820 --> 01:22:23,994 I might have a little trouble with the metal detector. 1246 01:22:48,723 --> 01:22:51,772 "Wow. I've never had sex with a knight before." 1247 01:22:52,393 --> 01:22:54,942 "I'm gonna fuck you on the Round Table, bitch." 1248 01:22:59,984 --> 01:23:00,985 Cut! 1249 01:25:02,189 --> 01:25:03,941 Felt real to me. 98115

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.