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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:36,400 林先生，我們在香港找了四個月 2 00:00:36,480 --> 00:00:38,160 終於找到令郎的後人 3 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:39,800 也就是你孫子的下落 4 00:00:39,880 --> 00:00:41,120 讓我們先看一下錄影帶 5 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,680 他叫林天賜 6 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:45,920 在中環一家廣告公司上班 7 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:48,960 他母親也在香港，姓左叫香香 8 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,640 因為她跟你兒子結婚了 9 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:53,200 所以又叫林左氏 10 00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,160 她最大的樂趣是打麻將 11 00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:57,240 經常跟一票闊太太在一起 12 00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:01,040 我孫子他結婚了沒有？ 13 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:02,360 他不只沒結婚 14 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:04,040 連結婚的徵兆都沒有 15 00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:07,920 什麼？難道他是同性戀 16 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:08,640 也不是 17 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,160 他從小就跟女孩子沒有緣分 18 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:14,960 唸小學的時候經常的被女孩子欺負 19 00:01:15,320 --> 00:01:18,160 唸中學的時候就被女孩子打 20 00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:20,640 上了大學，他交了女朋友 21 00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:22,840 很可惜又被女朋友給甩了 22 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:31,520 醫生說過我還有兩個月的生命 23 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:36,600 我希望我臨死之前 24 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,920 還能看到林家有後 25 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:46,960 起碼也讓我看到孫子成家立業 26 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,000 林先生，中國人有句俗話 27 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,040 重賞之下必有勇夫 28 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,040 你可以叫他們在一個月之內結婚 29 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:56,200 否則的話就不能夠繼承 30 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,360 你三億美元的遺產 31 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,120 三億？ 32 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:06,360 史東先生，你就代表我到香港 33 00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:12,160 去告訴天賜要他在一個月之內結婚 34 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:17,960 如果在下個月一號中午12點以前 35 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:20,280 他還沒結婚 36 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:23,200 我準備留給他的那一筆 37 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:28,000 三億美金的遺產我就給我侄子 38 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:31,480 三億？ 39 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:36,360 我？ 40 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:41,240 不過我還有一個附帶的條件 41 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:44,200 就是不能把這個秘密 42 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:47,320 洩漏出去讓人知道 43 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:53,600 因為我不希望那個女人是因為錢 44 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:55,080 而嫁給我孫子的 45 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:56,240 是的，林先生 46 00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:01,960 三億… 47 00:03:03,160 --> 00:03:04,480 你在這裡幹嘛？ 48 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:08,520 沒有，我在唱歌 49 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:16,760 我在雨中唱歌… 50 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,840 我現在已經是一個有錢大富翁 51 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:51,640 親愛的上帝，我信仰你這麼久了 52 00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:53,160 從來沒有要求過你什麼 53 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:56,080 今天晚上我希望你能賜給我一個 54 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:57,760 二筒 55 00:03:57,840 --> 00:03:59,040 不是二筒，上帝 56 00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:01,320 我想要一個不論外表或內在 57 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,760 都是完美無瑕的終身伴侶 58 00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:05,120 我的要求很低 59 00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:07,760 只要有林青霞，張曼玉，鍾楚紅 60 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,280 這三個人混合體就行了 61 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:12,160 我知道你一定會答應我的 62 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:14,160 希望她很快出現在我的眼前 63 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:15,520 開 64 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:17,920 我有周潤發那麼迷人 65 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,760 劉德華那麼英俊，王晶的氣質 66 00:04:19,840 --> 00:04:20,840 合不合你的要求 67 00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:25,080 王晶是誰？他有什麼氣質？ 68 00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:27,000 卑鄙無恥，還跟我一樣下流 69 00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:30,560 表哥，你大半夜跑到我房間裡幹嘛 70 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,880 咱們是好兄弟，今天晚上賓館客滿 71 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:34,840 良宵苦短 72 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:37,000 這種尤物我總不能白白浪費 73 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:38,800 你出去看姑媽打麻將嘛 74 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,440 不行，讓媽知道了怎麼辦？ 75 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,280 你不說，我不說誰知道呀？ 76 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:43,600 你看看嘛 77 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,080 死人，我要洗澡 78 00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:49,080 人家還沒洗澡呢，你太沒同情心了 79 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:52,160 大不了我付你房錢，幫幫忙，謝了 80 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:53,120 不行呀 81 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,000 你得快點出來 82 00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:59,880 出來，那麼快出來我有什麼搞頭？ 83 00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:00,880 去… 84 00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:02,680 該你了 85 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:04,280 媽 86 00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:07,240 兒子怎麼了？還不去睡呀？ 87 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:08,320 睡不著嘛 88 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:16,240 兒子，怎麼這樣打呵欠 89 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:17,680 太沒規矩了 90 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:26,440 牙疼 91 00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:34,360 你怪笑個什麼勁？ 92 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:37,000 你的牌好爛哪 93 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,080 打什麼呢？ 94 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:44,320 快打呀 95 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:45,200 等等嘛 96 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:47,400 一筒 97 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:49,120 胡了 98 00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:54,560 終於逮到你了，十三么吊一筒 99 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,840 我知道他們母子倆串通好抬轎子 100 00:05:58,920 --> 00:05:59,400 對… 101 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:02,520 他一會兒怪笑，一會兒又說牙疼 102 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:03,840 這分明是詐賭 103 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:06,320 願賭服輸，你幹嘛這麼不甘願 104 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:08,160 話可不能這麼說 105 00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:09,880 你打了老半天也沒胡過牌 106 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,240 你兒子一出來你就胡個大牌 107 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:13,320 這不是抬轎子是什麼？ 108 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:14,200 對 109 00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:16,320 兒子，給我回房去 110 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,040 什麼，回房裡去？ 111 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:20,640 當然了，讓人家這麼說，多難聽 112 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:21,480 進去 113 00:06:24,280 --> 00:06:25,560 給錢… 114 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,600 你在敲什麼敲得叮叮咚咚的 115 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:31,200 敲門 116 00:06:31,280 --> 00:06:32,840 進自己的房間還要敲門 117 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,520 你房裡有鬼是不是？神經病 118 00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:36,520 我忘了 119 00:06:37,880 --> 00:06:38,680 進來吧 120 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:41,880 快點幫幫忙，我搞不定她，快呀 121 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:42,920 你有病呀？ 122 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:44,480 幹這種事情還要人幫忙？ 123 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:45,240 你不要想歪了 124 00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:46,880 我只是叫你把她按住 125 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:51,400 你住哪裡？ 126 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:53,320 住印度 127 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,320 印度 128 00:06:57,960 --> 00:06:59,040 裡面搞什麼鬼？ 129 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,040 進去… 130 00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:04,200 你趕快進去 131 00:07:04,280 --> 00:07:05,080 安靜 132 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:07,000 兒子，開門哪 133 00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:08,600 你在裡頭搞什麼鬼？ 134 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,000 你在搞什麼呀？吵得那麼凶 135 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:18,680 我在看電視 136 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:20,320 看電視？ 137 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,720 我看不是吧 138 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:28,960 真巧呀 139 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:29,880 也太巧了 140 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,760 好噁心呀！ 141 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,920 難怪你兒子到了三十歲還沒女朋友 142 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,200 怎麼這麼多人，開舞會呀？ 143 00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:50,000 那個廣告的企劃案好了沒有？ 144 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:51,800 經理，就快好了 145 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:52,880 搞什麼嘛？ 146 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:54,680 這麼爛的案子還要我來想 147 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:57,120 美人 148 00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:00,320 先去填飽肚子 149 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:01,040 到哪兒吃呀？ 150 00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:02,960 慢點…先給我女朋友打個電話 151 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:03,720 等我一下 152 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:06,880 還是我快 153 00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:08,000 你… 154 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,040 對不起，小姐，我先打 155 00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:15,000 我得先找一塊錢…一塊錢在哪裡？ 156 00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:15,960 有沒有一塊錢？ 157 00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:18,640 我有五毛錢 158 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,240 先生，我有 159 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:23,880 小姐，你真好心，謝了 160 00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:27,920 我謝你一褲子，沒零錢還搶個屁呀 161 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:30,080 出門沒燒香，踩了一腳狗屎 162 00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:31,160 我衰到家了我 163 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:32,760 小妞，你少撒野了 164 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:34,320 回去問問你娘，搞不好 165 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,400 我還是你老爸呢 166 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:37,680 你說什麼？我看你是欠扁了 167 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:38,720 那也輪不到你呀 168 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:39,840 好了，不要吵了… 169 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:41,440 沒事，安啦 170 00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:42,760 要是帶種的話 171 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:44,160 就先讓我先打一巴掌 172 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:45,520 要是老娘打爽了的話 173 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:46,680 說不定賞你一塊錢 174 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,720 天賜，上路的話 175 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,240 到路邊給我討兩塊錢回來 176 00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:51,880 討？ 177 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:52,320 快去 178 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:52,720 我… 179 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,200 你他媽的傻賤哪 180 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:55,480 什麼事呀？小小 181 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:57,040 好大奶奶 182 00:08:57,360 --> 00:08:59,760 就是這兩個土蛋，跟人家搶電話 183 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,480 哪像個男人，簡直下流？ 184 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,480 不好意思，我朋友喜歡開玩笑 185 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:05,240 是呀 186 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:08,200 少裝蒜，剛剛怎麼沒見你這麼溫柔 187 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,200 小小 188 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:11,560 小姐，貴姓？ 189 00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:13,200 叫我Fitty好了 190 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,880 純屬誤會 191 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:18,880 我是做社會工作的 192 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:20,960 有理想有抱負 193 00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:23,200 我最欣賞從事社會服務的人 194 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:24,840 你說什麼？ 195 00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:26,840 我沒有說話 196 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,240 什麼？剛剛叫我跟她搶電話 197 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:31,440 現在叫我約人家吃飯 198 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:32,200 我沒有 199 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,120 閉嘴 200 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:34,640 小姐，你就快點答應他吧 201 00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:35,840 如果你們不答應的話 202 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:37,200 待會我就有得瞧了 203 00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:37,880 我沒有呀 204 00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:38,800 不必客氣了 205 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,080 有人請客，我們幹嘛不去呀 206 00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:43,240 還怕他把我們吃了？ 207 00:09:43,680 --> 00:09:45,320 小小，這樣子不太好吧 208 00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:48,880 幾位要不要喝點什麼？ 209 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:50,160 你問她好了 210 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:51,800 紅酒可以嗎？ 211 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:52,520 好呀 212 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,480 那算什麼酒，要喝當然喝啤酒了 213 00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:58,320 先拿四瓶啤酒，慢點 214 00:09:58,400 --> 00:09:59,760 乾脆就來一打好了 215 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:03,080 我一看你 216 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:05,480 就知道你一定是很會喝的樣子 217 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:07,840 我不會喝酒 218 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:10,000 又沒叫你一個人喝光 219 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:11,520 對了，你會不會划拳？ 220 00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:12,280 不會 221 00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:17,280 SUZUKI…TOYOTA…YAMAHA 222 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:19,360 很簡單的嘛，你會了吧 223 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:21,880 你斯文一點行不行？ 224 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:24,640 出來找樂子為的就是尋開心 225 00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:25,840 幹嘛裝模作樣？ 226 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:27,720 你答應過我什麼？ 227 00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:30,600 答應過你要做個淑女 228 00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:32,000 不跟你們玩了 229 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:36,600 你有沒有煙？來一根 230 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:39,600 我不會抽煙 231 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,720 又不抽煙不喝酒 232 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:44,440 不能打不會幹 233 00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:45,640 你怎麼泡妞？ 234 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:47,880 我很少 235 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,120 不是很少，是沒有 236 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:50,520 我就不同了 237 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,440 我是多得不想泡 238 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:55,040 直到今天下午我看到了Fitty 239 00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,800 我平靜的心就像小鹿般的狂跳 240 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:00,560 我的雞皮疙瘩快掉一地了 241 00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:01,720 你噁不噁心呀？ 242 00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:04,240 你們別老是吵個沒完的好不好？ 243 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:06,600 我看要你老實十分鐘都不可能 244 00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:08,880 誰說的，我樂小小 245 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,400 如果在十分鐘之內說一句髒話 246 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:14,120 或是有粗魯的行為，我就是王八 247 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:15,600 現在開始計時 248 00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:17,120 好，賭一百塊 249 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:17,760 好 250 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:19,280 我跟你賭五千塊 251 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:21,840 話可是你說的喔！ 252 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:22,880 當然了 253 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:25,040 她不說髒話我是婊子 254 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:26,760 你快蒙主寵召了 255 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,560 麻煩你嘴巴放乾淨點行嗎？ 256 00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:31,920 天賜 257 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:32,680 媽 258 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:34,400 這麼巧 259 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:37,640 媽，您剛剛上哪兒去了？ 260 00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:40,120 我剛剛去廟裡上完了香 261 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,560 順便來吃點東西 262 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:43,840 這些都是你朋友？ 263 00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:45,040 是呀，我來幫你介紹 264 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,560 不用了…你們吃吧，我先回去了 265 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:49,160 伯母 266 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,320 這位是… 267 00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:56,200 我叫樂小小，伯母，您的皮膚好嫩 268 00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,240 都一大把年紀了 269 00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,240 滿臉皺紋還嫩什麼 270 00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:02,640 我說的是真的 271 00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:04,040 我向來不會說謊的 272 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:07,280 這是天賜的女朋友？ 273 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:08,200 可能 274 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:12,120 你看郎才女貌，兩個人挺相配的 275 00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:14,680 媽 276 00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:18,320 那我們兩個呢？ 277 00:12:18,440 --> 00:12:21,440 你女兒跟你不像，不過她很漂亮 278 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:26,200 天賜常跟我說伯母燒的一手好菜 279 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,000 改天要到府上跟您好好學學 280 00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:33,240 你實在太客氣了，下星期是我生日 281 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:34,800 你過來玩嘛 282 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,520 一定到，不過只怕天賜 283 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:39,560 帶去的女孩子不會是我 284 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,280 開玩笑，他不帶你，他帶誰呀？ 285 00:12:42,840 --> 00:12:44,240 你可一定要來 286 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:45,640 好的，伯母，謝謝 287 00:12:45,720 --> 00:12:46,480 再見了 288 00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:47,640 繼續吃，再見 289 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:48,360 媽，再見 290 00:12:48,440 --> 00:12:49,160 拜拜 291 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:50,720 你真行 292 00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:52,720 過獎了，Fitty小姐 293 00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:54,720 怎麼了，林先生？ 294 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:57,720 我媽真的把你當成我的女朋友 295 00:12:57,800 --> 00:12:59,200 那就算真的也無妨 296 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,000 那真是一朵鮮花插在牛糞上了 297 00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:06,000 借我看一下時間 298 00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:08,240 謝謝 299 00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:13,560 打賭時間還沒到 300 00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:15,760 你輸給我五千塊錢了，錢拿來 301 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:17,680 賭你媽，已經過了十五秒了 302 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,080 你他媽趕快給錢 303 00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:21,640 再雞歪小心老娘打得你滿地找牙 304 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:25,680 看什麼看，有飯就吃有屎就拉 305 00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,120 沒看過老娘K人哪 306 00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:27,720 回頭 307 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:28,920 啊… 308 00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:32,080 怎麼不坐計程車？ 309 00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:34,760 小時候我爸最喜歡帶我坐電車 310 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:36,520 他現在不帶你坐了？ 311 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,400 他早就掛了 312 00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:40,000 掛了？什麼意思？ 313 00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:41,680 死了 314 00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:47,480 對不起，我不是故意的，對不起 315 00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:48,320 沒關係 316 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,720 他已經死了好幾年了 317 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,360 跟人家打架打死 318 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,560 我們家現在只剩大哥跟大嫂 319 00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:56,800 你大哥現在做什麼？ 320 00:13:57,640 --> 00:13:59,200 沒有固定工作 321 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:00,960 偶而替人家看看場子 322 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:02,680 平常玩玩六合彩 323 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,600 不然就是放放高利貸 324 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:06,240 要是有人看誰不爽 325 00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:07,840 就會丟個幾萬塊錢出來 326 00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:09,720 他就幫忙把人手腳給卸了 327 00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:11,080 打個臨時工 328 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:12,560 那不就是黑社會？ 329 00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,600 不是每個人都像你那麼幸運 330 00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:18,320 我大哥才唸到國小二年級 331 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:19,560 我唸到國中一年級 332 00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:20,840 不幹這行他能做什麼？ 333 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,200 吃人總比被人吃好吧 334 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:27,960 想不到你這麼年輕 335 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:29,280 思想會這麼成熟 336 00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:32,160 你長得不錯很適合拍廣告 337 00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:35,320 是嗎？有時候我也當模特兒的 338 00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:37,360 我在廣告公司上班 339 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,440 有機會我們可以合作，好嗎？ 340 00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:40,600 好了…以後再說 341 00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:43,720 待會到我家坐坐 342 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:45,840 我大哥老說我的男朋友 343 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:47,520 沒一個長得像人樣的 344 00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:49,760 他一看到你一定會喜歡 345 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:50,920 來…請坐 346 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:52,600 天賜，我大嫂 347 00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:53,680 你好，大嫂 348 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:55,920 我給你倒杯茶 349 00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:00,680 連水都沒了 350 00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:03,640 這樣吧， 喝杯白蘭地吧 351 00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:04,800 你不要客氣，大嫂 352 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:05,880 沒關係 353 00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,160 媽，我口好渴 354 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,000 口渴？ 355 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:12,680 喝點白蘭地吧 356 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,960 好棒喔，有酒喝 357 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:16,960 老婆 幹嘛？ 358 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:18,280 把我的傢伙通通拿出來 359 00:15:18,360 --> 00:15:19,600 待會談判要用 360 00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:23,800 老妹，你男朋友呀？ 361 00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:26,840 問你話 362 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,040 我… 363 00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,080 我是在跟你聊天，不是在跟你談判 364 00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:34,840 咿呀咿呀的口齒不清 365 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:37,920 來一根吧 366 00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:39,640 這是什麼？ 367 00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:40,480 好貨色 368 00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:43,720 抽大麻，哪種好 369 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:47,520 當然是我們老大的那種好 370 00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:50,480 效果強，味道香 371 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:54,120 貨源呢？咱們自己種 372 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:55,080 我不敢抽 373 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:55,560 你不敢？ 374 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:56,000 不敢 375 00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,520 真的不敢？ 真的不敢 376 00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:58,440 白痴 377 00:15:58,840 --> 00:15:59,800 都拿去 378 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:05,160 讓開 379 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:11,800 你拿這麼大把刀準備要幹什麼？ 380 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,400 我說要來刮鬍子你信不信？ 381 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:15,320 我不表示意見 382 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:20,040 老妹，你從哪裡認識這個大土蛋 383 00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:21,920 他可是個老實人 384 00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:24,920 土蛋 385 00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,000 你要敢欺負我老妹 386 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,960 小心我刮你鬍子，知不知道？ 387 00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:29,800 知道 388 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:32,160 同樣的要是有人敢欺負你 389 00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:33,560 你就告訴我 390 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:34,920 我把他全家人都給砍死 391 00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:36,440 好… 392 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:37,840 我走了 393 00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:38,760 打得開心 394 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:40,720 我是去開會 395 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,640 不要走，晚上我們一塊吃宵夜 396 00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:47,640 記住，不准走 397 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,360 好，我不走 398 00:16:58,040 --> 00:16:59,280 你的腿怎麼了？ 399 00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:00,880 我也不知道 400 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:02,680 它為甚麼不聽使喚抖個沒完 401 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:06,680 其實我老哥是個大好人 402 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:08,560 只是他那個長相挺嚇人的嘛 403 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,000 像你這麼膽小的人不多了 404 00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:11,880 走吧 405 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,400 不行，你哥哥叫我在這裡等他 406 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,000 我陪你一塊走就不用怕了 407 00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:19,080 那就不用麻煩了 408 00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:22,800 其實我也不是很怕啦 409 00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:26,960 那我先走了，你不用送我了 410 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,000 我只是想呼吸一點新鮮空氣 411 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:30,960 不要怕 412 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:32,560 我忘了告訴你我的名字了 413 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,680 我叫樂長劍 414 00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,160 因為我出生的時候 415 00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:36,320 我爸爸手上拿把長劍 416 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:37,680 所以我叫樂長劍 417 00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:40,360 你叫什麼名字？ 418 00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:41,440 林天賜 419 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,120 我小弟知道在什麼地方找到你了 420 00:17:44,360 --> 00:17:46,440 長劍哥慢走，不送了 421 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,160 不要叫我長劍哥 422 00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:49,960 我的英文名字叫Leslie 423 00:17:50,040 --> 00:17:51,160 叫我Leslie就行了 424 00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:54,080 是不是跟剛退休的張國榮一樣？ 425 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,320 是我叫他退休的 426 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:57,320 他吃了豹子膽敢跟我用一樣的名字 427 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:58,680 不怕我把他給剁了？ 428 00:17:59,080 --> 00:17:59,960 我先走了 429 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:02,120 長劍哥，不，Leslie 430 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:03,680 慢走，再見 431 00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:05,560 你不怕他了？ 432 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:08,920 Leslie他好和藹 433 00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:12,600 過了那個天橋有地下鐵可以坐 434 00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:14,480 鞦韆 435 00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:17,800 我小的時候就很喜歡盪鞦韆 436 00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:19,720 不過老是輪不到我 437 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,040 連女孩子我都搶不過 438 00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:22,600 現在居然沒有人要玩 439 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,520 也不是，現在的小孩都早熟 440 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:27,960 該是盪鞦韆的年齡已經去騙人了 441 00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:31,240 該玩官兵捉強盜的時候早去做賊了 442 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:33,120 該騎腳踏車的時候他就… 443 00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:34,920 你不要說了，我知道… 444 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,600 去騎馬，你當他還能騎什麼？ 445 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:45,040 來…笑一個…好 446 00:18:45,120 --> 00:18:47,240 這邊再來一張，笑一個 447 00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:50,000 伯母 448 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:51,600 伯母，您好 449 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:52,960 歡迎… 450 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:54,520 一點小意思，不成敬意 451 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:57,640 招呼不周，裡頭隨便坐 452 00:18:57,720 --> 00:19:00,560 裡面坐…別客氣 453 00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:04,360 怎麼這麼不會做人 454 00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:05,600 就送這麼個蛋糕？ 455 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,000 拜託，這是兩百多塊買的 456 00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:10,920 我還有事我先走了 457 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,480 我答應幫一個朋友照顧家的 458 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:13,640 我得趕回去才行 459 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,160 別急，吃完再走 460 00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:18,120 那一家子老爸愛吸毒 461 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,800 老媽是個舞馬，大兒子是個白癡 462 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:22,600 小兒子又得了羊癲瘋 463 00:19:23,040 --> 00:19:24,800 我聽說他們家今天還失火了 464 00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:25,880 你還是快去看看他們 465 00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:27,200 好吧，那就不留你了 466 00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:30,520 天賜，我有話跟你說，你過來一下 467 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:31,440 有話跟我說？ 468 00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:36,600 小小平常都很好 469 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:38,120 不過千萬不能讓她喝酒 470 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:39,480 否則幾杯黃湯一下肚 471 00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:41,320 可就滿嘴胡說八道了 472 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:42,160 知不知道？ 473 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:43,520 我知道，我會注意的 474 00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:44,560 那我先走了 475 00:19:44,640 --> 00:19:45,240 好 476 00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:46,440 拜拜 477 00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:48,000 幫我照顧小小 478 00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:48,560 你放心好了 479 00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:49,600 拜拜 480 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:51,880 天賜 481 00:19:52,120 --> 00:19:54,520 這可是第一次看你帶著女朋友出現 482 00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:56,320 為了慶祝你這個遲來的春天 483 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:57,360 我們大家乾一杯 484 00:19:57,880 --> 00:19:58,280 乾一杯 485 00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:00,480 各位表哥，你們明知道我不會喝酒 486 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:02,120 不要鬧了 487 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:03,080 怎麼能不喝呢 488 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:05,400 你要不喝，我用這杯酒給你洗頭了 489 00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:05,960 你喝不喝？ 490 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:07,320 放了我吧，拜託拜託 491 00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,560 天賜，難得都這麼高興 492 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:11,320 就陪表哥們喝一杯吧 493 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:13,520 謝了… 494 00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:14,760 不是這一杯 495 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:15,520 不是這一杯？ 496 00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:16,440 是這一杯 497 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:18,520 這麼大一杯，不要開玩笑 498 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,440 總不能在女朋友面前丟人吧 499 00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:23,880 說的也是，你到底是喝還是不喝？ 500 00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:24,280 對呀 501 00:20:24,360 --> 00:20:24,960 好 502 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:28,520 喝呀… 503 00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:30,880 真能喝呀 504 00:20:31,320 --> 00:20:32,560 好事成雙呀 505 00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:34,200 你們不要灌他行不行？ 506 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:37,280 不要灌他？那就灌你好了 507 00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:38,440 那我們來划拳怎麼樣 508 00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:40,400 划拳最好看了 509 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:41,240 看你是女孩子 510 00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:42,960 我跟你划五、十、十五好了 511 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,200 不必了，哥倆好 512 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,600 哥倆好呀，單一單哪，六六順哪 513 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:52,120 你輸了，喝吧… 514 00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:00,720 各位，一個都別想走呀 515 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,480 你…該你了 516 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:06,320 十五，二十 517 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,680 沒有，二十，喝吧 518 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:22,160 不要說我欺負你們，我先乾為敬了 519 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:23,880 小小，不要喝酒 520 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:24,720 幹嘛不喝 521 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,720 剛才你喝得有多樂 522 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:34,800 你，最會說話的，來划拳 523 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:36,880 我們快走吧 524 00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:40,120 媽在看我們了 525 00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:42,440 走了… 526 00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:43,840 伯母 527 00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:48,200 樂小姐，看不出你酒量還這麼好 528 00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,520 沒有，我…我喝醉了 529 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:51,240 是呀 530 00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:52,440 天賜，你還不快扶我走 531 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,120 媽，她喝醉了… 532 00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,400 你怎麼來這麼晚，等你好久了 533 00:21:57,480 --> 00:21:58,240 不好意思 534 00:21:58,520 --> 00:21:59,520 牛太太 535 00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:00,360 生日快樂 536 00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:01,800 謝謝兩位賞光 537 00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:04,760 我們老大姐過生日，怎麼能不來呢 538 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:05,640 就是嘛 539 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,120 現在時間還早，我們先打個幾圈吧 540 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:10,520 不行呀，我們才三個人 541 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:14,480 叫你兒子的女朋友上，不就行了嘛 542 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:15,200 我？ 對呀 543 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:17,520 樂小姐，陪我們打個幾圈吧 544 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:20,520 我不會打 545 00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:23,320 這個一學就會了，這樣好了 546 00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:25,320 要是你輸了就算我的好了 547 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:25,920 怎麼樣？ 548 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:27,640 那我… 549 00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:29,120 來吧…先打幾圈吧 550 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:30,640 走了… 551 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:31,600 媽 552 00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:35,880 天賜 553 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,640 我叫Robert，是你的堂兄 554 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:46,520 我萬里迢迢，從美國回來找你的 555 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:48,280 你說什麼？ 556 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,080 你死去老爸的老爸 557 00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,040 是我老爸的叔叔 558 00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:55,160 明白嗎？ 559 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:55,840 不 560 00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:58,440 Auntie 561 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:00,280 他搞什麼鬼呀？ 562 00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:03,240 Auntie 563 00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:07,840 你是幹什麼？你到底是誰？ 564 00:23:08,360 --> 00:23:09,400 我是Robert 565 00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:11,800 你先生是不是姓林？ 566 00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:12,600 是呀 567 00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:14,160 那你是不是姓左？ 568 00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:14,840 沒錯 569 00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:16,240 你一定是林左氏，錯不了 570 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:17,520 Auntie 571 00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,240 對不起…別在這裡攪和，行不行？ 572 00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:21,040 先讓我打完這把再說 573 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:30,000 紅中 574 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:30,680 碰 575 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:31,760 慢點 576 00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:35,320 胡了，十三么單吊紅中 577 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:38,000 你可真會吊，我手上有一對 578 00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:39,400 你居然還有絕章 579 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:41,400 一起手就這樣 580 00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:43,880 Auntie，這位是誰？ 581 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,000 她是天賜的女朋友 582 00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:49,800 天賜可真沒眼光 583 00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:51,200 居然交了一個女老千 584 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:52,600 你胡說什麼？ 585 00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,080 我親眼看你吐兩張牌 586 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,040 怪不得你能胡十三么 587 00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:03,520 你為什麼要陷害我？ 588 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:05,320 我幹嘛要害你，我又不認識你 589 00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,200 我是你公公的侄孫 590 00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:09,680 連我都沒見過我公公 591 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:12,560 他住在美國，他叫我回來找你們 592 00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:14,920 邀請你們全家到法國巴黎去玩 593 00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:17,440 有這麼好的事 594 00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,200 廢話少說，先弄清楚你害我的原因 595 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:21,200 小小，算了，不要這樣 596 00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:21,840 你讓開 597 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:23,880 王八蛋，老娘找你單挑 598 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,120 這麼厲害 599 00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:28,520 小小，你放手呀 600 00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:30,640 天賜，你怎麼跟這種人交朋友 601 00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:32,280 沒規矩，還耍老千 602 00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:34,360 媽，她平常不是這樣的 603 00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:35,880 今天可能多喝一點酒 604 00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:37,000 我的國語不太靈光 605 00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,120 不過這好像叫扮豬吃老虎 606 00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:40,160 你這個… 607 00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:41,360 小小，你不要這樣 608 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:42,560 你少在這裡撒野 609 00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,040 我們可不歡迎你 610 00:24:44,360 --> 00:24:45,800 你以為我喜歡留在這兒呀 611 00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:49,200 小小，小小你不要走 612 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:51,200 你等等，要走把蛋糕也帶走 613 00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:53,960 留著給你們那一票小混混吃吧 614 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:54,920 媽 615 00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:56,040 小混混 616 00:24:59,040 --> 00:24:59,880 小小 617 00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:02,200 怎麼樣？ 618 00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:04,200 好蛋糕 619 00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:10,840 你跑哪兒去了？ 620 00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:11,960 我在隔壁的片場 621 00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:13,240 看到一個很正點的馬子 622 00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:14,000 你還有空看女人 623 00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:15,400 我的模特兒到現在還沒來 624 00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,400 我已經派人去催了，你急有屁用 625 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:20,360 隔壁的馬子很棒…來吧… 626 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:21,400 幹什麼？ 627 00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:22,840 你看嘛，不賴吧 628 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:52,600 CUT，換衣服 629 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:56,200 攝影師，剛剛鏡頭有沒有問題？ 630 00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:57,400 沒有問題 631 00:25:57,480 --> 00:25:59,480 場記，查一查有沒有漏什麼鏡頭 632 00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:00,360 知道 633 00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:08,320 嗨！ 嗨！ 634 00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:13,680 對不起 635 00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:25,840 你沒事吧 636 00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:29,320 你的耳環 637 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:31,400 謝謝 638 00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:57,040 天賜，你回來了 639 00:26:58,840 --> 00:26:59,840 回來了 640 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:01,760 天賜，Robert說 641 00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:03,600 要請我們到巴黎去玩 642 00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:04,440 你知不知道為什麼？ 643 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:09,560 這完全是親情，我可是真心誠意的 644 00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:11,040 扮下去，Robert 645 00:27:13,120 --> 00:27:14,480 打哪兒冒出個洋鬼子？ 646 00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:16,640 我會說國語，林太太 647 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,040 你的公公林新發先生 648 00:27:19,120 --> 00:27:21,040 他是紐約華人巨富 649 00:27:21,120 --> 00:27:24,120 他準備把三億美金遺產留給天賜 650 00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:26,160 不過有一個條件就是 651 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:28,480 必須在一個月之內結婚 652 00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:30,120 還剩二十七天 653 00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:31,680 那就是下個月一號？ 654 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:33,400 不錯，是下個月一號 655 00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,200 而且一定要在中午十二點以前結婚 656 00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:38,800 怪不得你誠心誠意請我們去巴黎玩 657 00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:39,640 是希望我們拿不到 658 00:27:39,720 --> 00:27:41,480 這三億美金的遺產是吧，是不是？ 659 00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:44,080 不是… 660 00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:44,960 不是？ 661 00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:46,680 你們拿不到就是他的 662 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,880 你這個臭小子，你真是壞蛋 663 00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:54,720 姑媽，你的武功真好 664 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:55,800 那可不 665 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:57,200 兒子… 666 00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,560 廢話少說了，馬上給我結婚去 667 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:02,440 說得容易，上哪兒找？ 668 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,080 有錢還怕找不著嗎？ 669 00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:07,320 還有一個附帶條件 670 00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:09,000 就是不能讓那女孩子知道 671 00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:10,560 將來她會是一個大富翁 672 00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:14,240 天賜，你放心 673 00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:15,760 一切都交給媽了 674 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,080 無論如何，媽一定會給你找一個 675 00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,720 十全十美的老婆的 676 00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:24,920 她叫阿信，能幹活又知道節儉 677 00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:28,240 手腳又俐落，尤其對長輩很尊敬 678 00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:31,440 這麼說起來阿信還真是不錯 679 00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:32,480 請多多指教 680 00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,160 伯母，您腰痠不痠？ 681 00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:35,920 要不要我幫你按摩？ 682 00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:36,720 不用了 683 00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:38,720 天賜哥，你呢？ 684 00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:40,120 不用… 685 00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:43,720 叫點東西來吃 686 00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:45,920 不要了，這裡東西好貴 687 00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:50,840 天賜哥，你那一大碗湯都不喝了？ 688 00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:53,160 我吃飽了，喝不下了 689 00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:54,840 我幫你喝了它，免得浪費 690 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:01,640 伯母，您飯才吃了一半？ 691 00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:03,920 我吃不下了 692 00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:07,040 能省就省，千萬不要浪費了 693 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:21,560 你不要了？ 694 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:24,040 當然不要了 695 00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:27,040 這不是餛飩 696 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:28,520 我不是吃，我要拿回家 697 00:29:28,800 --> 00:29:29,680 可以做漿糊 698 00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:32,240 你這樣也太節省了吧 699 00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,680 她是呀，阿信一個月才花六十塊 700 00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:39,560 這怎麼行呀？ 701 00:29:39,640 --> 00:29:41,480 是呀，每個月我都會去賣血 702 00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:42,880 還有錢賺呢 703 00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:47,480 林太太，你們就多聊聊嘛 704 00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:49,200 淑娜很開放的 705 00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:50,960 才從美國回來的 706 00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:56,600 天賜，你看她的身材挺不錯的 707 00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:58,720 跟媽咪年輕的時候差不多 708 00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:02,720 天賜，你今年幾歲了？ 709 00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:04,720 二十九 710 00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:08,520 好，正好是男人性能力的顛峰期 711 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:09,360 你說什麼？ 712 00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:10,600 沒什麼，考慮一下性問題 713 00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,040 你有沒有固定的性伴侶？ 714 00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:15,280 有沒有… 715 00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:16,520 沒有… 716 00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:19,000 那你用什麼避孕呢？ 717 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,400 避孕？沒有 718 00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:23,080 我一直是贊成男人避孕的 719 00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:24,720 一來這樣比較乾淨 720 00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:27,000 二來它不會傷身體 721 00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,040 最重要的是現在愛滋病這麼流行 722 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:30,160 你過來一下 723 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:30,800 過來？ 724 00:30:30,880 --> 00:30:31,600 來呀 725 00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:37,360 什麼事？ 726 00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:38,320 親一個 727 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:41,720 接吻的技術很普通 728 00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,760 好在你不抽煙沒有口臭 729 00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:46,320 不過你沒有鬍子不夠刺激 730 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:48,720 算了，就當是抽涼煙 731 00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:49,640 淡就淡一點了 732 00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:53,240 淑娜，你還真開放 733 00:30:53,320 --> 00:30:54,680 好說，婚前先試清楚 734 00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:55,760 總比將來後悔好呀 735 00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:59,840 今天晚上你有沒有空，到我家來 736 00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:01,720 到你家？ 737 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,200 不去我家也行，那我到你家 738 00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:07,600 婚前不試清楚，將來怎麼做夫妻呢 739 00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:10,240 不要臉 740 00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:14,720 我忘了，今天晚上不行我約了阿森 741 00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:16,480 那咱們乾脆明天晚上，好不好？ 742 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:18,600 好… 743 00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:20,400 晚安 744 00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:21,480 你好 745 00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:34,720 她是我的乾女兒，木蘭花小姐 746 00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:35,480 是嗎？ 747 00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,560 這個長得不錯 748 00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:43,680 木蘭花小姐，你在哪兒工作？ 749 00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:45,120 我是在警界服務 750 00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:48,040 那很好呀，可是你長得這麼斯文 751 00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:50,480 在警界工作你不害怕呀 752 00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,920 不要動… 753 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:56,680 我把所有首飾都給戴出來了 754 00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:58,400 這下可全完蛋了 755 00:32:00,360 --> 00:32:01,800 快拿出來 756 00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:04,080 老兄，你不要亂來呀 757 00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:04,640 幹什麼？ 758 00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:05,760 不要 759 00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:10,520 媽 760 00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:33,480 不要過來，不然我殺了她，放下 761 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,080 別亂來，他真的會把我給殺了的 762 00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:37,160 過來，把槍放下 763 00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:39,960 不要開槍 764 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:49,440 這樣你也敢開槍，她居然真的開槍 765 00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:50,360 媽，你沒事吧？ 766 00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:51,480 沒事的 767 00:32:53,320 --> 00:32:54,560 從他抽起刀到砍下來 768 00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:56,000 最少還有一秒鐘的時間 769 00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,160 我只要打中他的頭，他馬上死了 770 00:32:58,240 --> 00:32:59,280 你安全得很 771 00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:01,120 我以為你是打字小姐 772 00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:02,720 不是，我在刑事組 773 00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:05,840 伯母，先坐下來喝杯茶嘛 774 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:07,520 不… 775 00:33:09,840 --> 00:33:11,040 有沒有人在？ 776 00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,080 怎麼一個人都沒有？ 777 00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:14,960 生意都不做了 778 00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:26,880 今天要做臉嘛？ 779 00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:30,920 幹什麼？ 780 00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:33,040 別怕，這是最新產品 781 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:34,240 剛剛才從法國運來的 782 00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:36,720 小姐，這是什麼東西？ 783 00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:38,760 最新護眼膜，很有效的 784 00:33:39,680 --> 00:33:41,840 可是我又沒說我要做 785 00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:44,400 免費的，你是這裡老客人了 786 00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:47,200 真的？免費的？那不做白不做 787 00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:50,360 對了，我還要做電子減肥呢 788 00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:52,120 時間少效果又好 789 00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:53,280 林太太來了沒有？ 790 00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:55,880 朱太太，我在這兒呢 791 00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:02,280 怎麼你自已也做臉了，真有一套 792 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:03,480 你是新來的？ 793 00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:05,880 到底幫客人做臉還是幫自己做 794 00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:08,080 沒有啦，這樣可以節省很多時間 795 00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:10,200 你坐下 796 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:11,840 林太太，我早就坐下了 797 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:15,160 對了，你那個兒子的對象找到沒有 798 00:34:15,240 --> 00:34:17,560 他自己都不急，我急有什麼用 799 00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,200 其實上次那個丫頭還挺不錯的 800 00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:22,360 水準太差了 801 00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:26,120 你別說，那丫頭的長相倒挺秀氣的 802 00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,520 長得秀氣有什麼用？身子骨那麼薄 803 00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:31,160 跟塊洗衣板似的，屁股上又沒有肉 804 00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:34,560 還什麼髒話都敢說一點規矩都不懂 805 00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,800 天賜要是看上她，我就苦了 806 00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:37,760 說得也是 807 00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:43,840 不過現在的女孩子 808 00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:46,600 不是個個都追求什麼豪放嗎？ 809 00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:48,400 我最怕這種豪放女了 810 00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:50,960 搞不好弄頂綠帽給我們天賜戴呢 811 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:52,080 不會吧 812 00:34:52,840 --> 00:34:54,040 這可是很難說唷 813 00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:56,080 你看她長著個婊子臉 814 00:34:56,160 --> 00:34:57,960 天生就是個賣騷的樣兒 815 00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:01,640 小姐，很疼 816 00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:03,960 會疼才表示有效嘛 817 00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,320 既然這樣再加點勁吧 818 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,240 你別生氣了 819 00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:10,560 看不到她還沒事，一看到她 820 00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:12,040 我就想給她兩嘴巴 821 00:35:13,760 --> 00:35:14,640 你幹嘛呀 822 00:35:14,720 --> 00:35:16,240 我又沒有叫你給我兩嘴巴子 823 00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:17,040 你沒有聽說過呀 824 00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:18,600 這是一種快速收縮 825 00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,000 對於收緊皮膚有特殊的神效 826 00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:21,680 真的？ 827 00:35:21,760 --> 00:35:22,400 是呀 828 00:35:22,680 --> 00:35:24,400 那你就多打兩下，我受得住的 829 00:35:27,600 --> 00:35:28,960 你這樣不痛呀？ 830 00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:30,560 為了美，痛也得忍呀 831 00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:32,880 要是讓我再碰見那丫頭 832 00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:35,200 我一定請她嚐嚐我的拿手好菜 833 00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:37,560 金華火腿，替她的父母親 834 00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:39,200 好好的教訓她一頓 835 00:35:39,640 --> 00:35:41,120 不過話又說回來了 836 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,240 她的父母也不是什麼好貨 837 00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:45,120 當真是婊子出妓女 838 00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:50,120 怎麼回事？發生什麼事了？ 839 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:50,680 你沒事吧？ 840 00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:52,000 你想電死我呀？ 841 00:35:52,080 --> 00:35:53,480 不懷好心，成心要整我 842 00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:55,600 你是幾號？快說你是幾號？ 843 00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:57,400 我非叫老闆娘開除你不可 844 00:35:57,480 --> 00:35:57,960 太不像話了 845 00:35:58,040 --> 00:35:59,000 你真是太離譜 846 00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:00,400 她跑掉了 847 00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:03,840 林太太，怎麼回事？ 848 00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:05,360 你生意是怎麼做的？ 849 00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:06,800 你從哪裡請來這種人 850 00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:08,480 差點沒把我給電死 851 00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:10,320 是哪個呀？ 852 00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:12,440 就是那個滿臉塗得白白的 853 00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:14,560 跑到那邊去了，你去看看哪 854 00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,240 對不起，我到裡面去看看是誰 855 00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:18,360 我們走了 856 00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:19,600 趁她們還沒過來，你快走吧 857 00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:20,440 謝了，拜拜 858 00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:21,360 拜拜 859 00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:25,080 沒關係，等她出來看看就知道了 860 00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:28,720 好呀，沒錯，原來真的就是你呀 861 00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:31,720 我說聲音聽起來怎麼會那麼熟悉 862 00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:33,120 是我又怎麼樣？ 863 00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:33,960 我打你 864 00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:34,960 你敢？ 865 00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:36,680 你怎麼可以對客人這麼凶呢？ 866 00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:39,640 凶又怎麼樣了？我有手有腳的 867 00:36:39,720 --> 00:36:42,080 我就不信香港會餓死人，我不幹了 868 00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:43,720 他媽的，你當老闆什麼大不了 869 00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:45,640 少跟我大小聲，什麼東西 870 00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:47,320 還有你們兩個大雞婆 871 00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:48,640 少在背後說我壞話 872 00:36:48,720 --> 00:36:50,040 當心下輩子沒屁眼 873 00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:52,480 講的這是什麼話… 874 00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:53,480 你們兩個再他媽雞歪的話 875 00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:55,880 當心老娘打得你滿地找牙 876 00:36:56,160 --> 00:36:57,000 幹嘛！ 877 00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:01,640 我們年輕的時候習慣是 878 00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:05,560 走三步扭兩下，看看前看看後 879 00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,800 男人看了連魂都沒了 880 00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:10,040 這有用嗎？ 881 00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:13,600 現在當然是沒用了，時代不同了 882 00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:15,520 那現在流行什麼？姨媽 883 00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:19,480 流行比誰的胸部大，仙桃鬥文旦 884 00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:21,200 一個說自己有個大仙桃 885 00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:23,400 那個又說自己是個大文旦 886 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:25,800 總之都是一堆大肥肉 887 00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:27,240 我看了都噁心 888 00:37:27,840 --> 00:37:29,960 姨媽，那我這個是什麼？ 889 00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,160 你呀，你是荷包蛋 890 00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:34,640 荷包蛋？ 891 00:37:34,720 --> 00:37:35,680 還涼透了 892 00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:38,080 所以只能用性感來彌補了 893 00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:40,960 擺個你認為最性感的姿勢姨媽瞧瞧 894 00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:43,320 性感？ 895 00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:03,480 你這是在幹什麼呀？ 896 00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:05,120 你三天沒拉屎了是不是呀？ 897 00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:08,840 不是呀，姨媽 898 00:38:08,920 --> 00:38:11,480 我每次去看那些小電影 899 00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:14,960 那裡面的那些女主角不都是這樣… 900 00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:17,280 就憑你這副德行 901 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:18,600 別說男人沒勾著了 902 00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:20,200 卻勾來一大群野狗 903 00:38:21,960 --> 00:38:23,440 那要怎樣才算性感嘛 904 00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:25,640 看姨媽表演 905 00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:30,720 眼角要往上挑，嘴角要微微翹 906 00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:33,440 這屁股要撅得高 907 00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:37,200 兩手這麼一夾，胸部才顯得挺 908 00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:41,320 眉梢眼角要帶著風騷 909 00:38:41,600 --> 00:38:45,640 男人看了就沒命的跟著你跑 910 00:38:47,640 --> 00:38:49,360 哪來兩隻駝鳥？ 911 00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,440 不是啦，姨媽在教我裝性… 912 00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:57,600 我在教你表妹素女心經 913 00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:00,560 媽，你以前不是告訴我 914 00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:01,880 那一套是騙人的嗎？ 915 00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:02,960 怎麼你又相信了？ 916 00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:04,440 現在先別說這些了 917 00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,360 天賜，媽給你介紹那麼多女孩子 918 00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,040 你到底是喜歡哪一個？ 919 00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:10,640 我一個都不喜歡 920 00:39:10,720 --> 00:39:11,960 你不是也不喜歡嗎？ 921 00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:15,520 你就將就將就，隨便挑一個算了 922 00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:18,080 已經沒有多少時間，只剩二十天了 923 00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:20,200 我不想談這個問題 924 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:26,160 姨媽，我是不是一看到表哥 925 00:39:26,240 --> 00:39:28,480 就要裝駝鳥？ 926 00:39:29,560 --> 00:39:30,320 來… 927 00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:33,160 快來看 928 00:39:33,240 --> 00:39:34,760 幫你擦防曬油好不好？ 929 00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:45,000 站他旁邊好有安全感喔 930 00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:50,360 媽，你已經十幾年沒有下水 931 00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:51,840 今天怎麼突然想游泳？ 932 00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:53,840 她是大輪船打哆嗦 933 00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:54,520 什麼意思？ 934 00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:55,400 發浪呀 935 00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:57,480 沒一句好聽的，真是 936 00:39:58,600 --> 00:39:59,680 兒子，你看看 937 00:39:59,960 --> 00:40:01,400 媽給你介紹這麼多女孩子 938 00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:02,760 你都沒一個看上的 939 00:40:02,840 --> 00:40:04,120 今天我把她們全約到這兒來 940 00:40:04,200 --> 00:40:05,960 你看哪個身材好，你就選了吧 941 00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:08,760 伯母，這些東西要放哪裡？ 942 00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:10,520 隨便找地方放就行了 943 00:40:12,760 --> 00:40:14,080 哪個身材好我就不知道 944 00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,160 不過像她那樣，早晚變成藍波的 945 00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:19,720 伯母，到這裡坐嘛 946 00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:24,800 謝謝 947 00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:26,200 看過今天的報紙沒有？ 948 00:40:26,280 --> 00:40:27,640 我在茶樓拿了幾份過來 949 00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:34,320 有沒有順便拿點蝦餃燒賣？ 950 00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,680 有呀，我外婆喝完了茶 951 00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:39,520 剩下就帶回來了，我還捨不得吃 952 00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:40,760 你喜歡，你拿去吃好了 953 00:40:44,240 --> 00:40:45,560 你外婆那麼早就去飲茶了 954 00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,320 不是，是上個月帶來的 955 00:40:56,560 --> 00:40:58,040 天賜，伯母 956 00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:02,040 木小姐，謝謝你來玩 957 00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:04,280 這個身材好 958 00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:08,240 別客氣，喜歡就去游泳 959 00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:10,800 我跟我兒子說完話之後就過來陪你 960 00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:12,760 您忙，我去看看這兒有沒有小偷 961 00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:14,280 逮到了就毒打一頓 962 00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:19,760 表哥，我靚靚也來了 963 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:21,400 要不要吃呀？ 964 00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:23,280 姨媽，表表哥 965 00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:25,480 這個正點，你好好把握 966 00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:26,440 想找死呀你？ 967 00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:28,840 媽，我看乾脆… 968 00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:30,040 好了…你安靜點 969 00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:33,000 你只要從這三個當中給我選一個 970 00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:33,920 就成了 971 00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:41,280 你要不要吃？很好吃 972 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:45,280 美人，什麼時候放假？ 973 00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:47,120 放假？我很少有假的 974 00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:48,560 我不會放棄任何一個 975 00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:50,200 打擊罪犯的機會 976 00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:53,000 像昨天我才抓到一個變態的殺人魔 977 00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:54,440 你不知道有多開心 978 00:41:54,720 --> 00:41:55,480 真有那麼刺激呀 979 00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:57,760 我們一衝進屋裡馬上把他制服了 980 00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:00,560 還用手銬把他銬在窗台上，才發現 981 00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:02,920 他把死者砍成一段一段放在冰箱裡 982 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,360 還把肉跟內臟分開來放呢 983 00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:06,640 你不知道他有多狠哪 984 00:42:06,720 --> 00:42:08,640 為了想跑把自己的手都砍斷了 985 00:42:08,720 --> 00:42:10,120 我一槍就把他的頭給打爛 986 00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:11,920 腦漿噴得到處都是 987 00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:14,000 再一看他原來正在吃早點 988 00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:16,840 他居然把死者的內臟拿來煮及第粥 989 00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:19,280 鍋子裡還浮著一雙眼球在那兒 990 00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:20,560 直盯著我看 991 00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:25,480 對了，在他吃的那個碗裡 992 00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:26,880 我還看到兩根手指頭 993 00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:29,600 在那兒晃來晃去的 994 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:32,080 就跟你碗裡那兩根大腸很像 995 00:42:33,720 --> 00:42:36,360 好噁心，我要吐了 996 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:39,040 你的嗓子不錯，呼叫的頻率很高 997 00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:39,960 如果以後我們局裡 998 00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:41,760 要拍案件重演的話 999 00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:43,280 我一定會推薦你演那個 1000 00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:45,960 被人砍成一段一段的女受害人 1001 00:42:52,240 --> 00:42:54,920 白雪公主七個小矮人 1002 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,400 七個矮人專門愛打洞 1003 00:42:57,480 --> 00:43:00,120 七個月有七個鬼 1004 00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:03,040 一起上山去打洞… 1005 00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:06,760 一點反應也沒有，難道不夠力？ 1006 00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:08,120 再換一首 1007 00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:11,440 五月花是個大酒家 1008 00:43:11,520 --> 00:43:14,160 裡面的小姐真不差 1009 00:43:14,240 --> 00:43:17,320 又可以打波還可以幹啥 1010 00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:20,520 又可以滴滴答，看什麼看？ 1011 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:22,880 你幹什麼？ 1012 00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:24,400 唱歌呀 1013 00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:26,320 唱歌？ 1014 00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:27,960 唱什麼歌呀？ 1015 00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:31,320 青青校樹，芭樂蓮霧 1016 00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:32,600 西瓜鳳梨都有 1017 00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:34,000 他在唱黃色歌曲 1018 00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:39,160 死胖子 1019 00:43:39,240 --> 00:43:41,320 你敢在我女朋友面前唱黃色歌曲 1020 00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:42,240 那你就唱呀 1021 00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:45,800 你唱五百首，少一首你就當心 1022 00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:46,880 五百？好 1023 00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:47,320 快唱 1024 00:43:47,400 --> 00:43:48,920 好…我唱… 1025 00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:53,000 我有兩支槍，長短不一樣 1026 00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:57,120 長的打土匪，短的打姑娘 1027 00:43:57,200 --> 00:44:01,720 FUCK，發… 1028 00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:02,520 真的？ 1029 00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:03,760 不是 1030 00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:48,560 又是她 1031 00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:00,880 天賜，你是我見到男人當中 1032 00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:02,200 最有魅力的一個 1033 00:45:04,200 --> 00:45:08,560 天賜，從我第一次看到你 1034 00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:12,440 我就愛上你，我願意做你的奴隸 1035 00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:15,480 用力擁抱我 1036 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:22,720 你少蓋了 1037 00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:27,240 天賜… 1038 00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:31,000 你怎麼了？ 1039 00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:32,400 小小，你來了 1040 00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:34,280 走，我們過去 1041 00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:39,360 媽，小小是專程來給你道歉的 1042 00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:40,160 伯母 1043 00:45:40,240 --> 00:45:40,840 姨媽 1044 00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:42,080 這兒太擠了吧 1045 00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:44,080 擠？不會呀，這裡好寬敞 1046 00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:45,040 我說擠就擠 1047 00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:48,880 姨媽，你要是不喜歡這個洗衣板 1048 00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:50,120 我來對付她 1049 00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,040 我可沒這麼說，不過我們是文明人 1050 00:45:53,120 --> 00:45:54,800 不跟這沒水準的人在一起 1051 00:45:54,880 --> 00:45:56,520 對呀… 1052 00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,240 小小… 1053 00:45:59,440 --> 00:46:01,040 小小，你不要跟我媽生氣 1054 00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:02,080 我跟你說對不起嘛 1055 00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:03,480 你媽那是什麼態度？ 1056 00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:04,800 我也有我的自尊 1057 00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,160 還要我跟她道歉呀 1058 00:46:06,240 --> 00:46:06,640 好了嘛 1059 00:46:06,720 --> 00:46:07,840 救命呀 1060 00:46:08,240 --> 00:46:09,320 我來救你了 1061 00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:12,280 天賜，你會不會游泳？ 1062 00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:17,600 救命呀 1063 00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:24,280 救命呀…我不會游泳，救命呀 1064 00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:26,920 姨媽，你看看表哥 1065 00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:27,960 天賜 1066 00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:30,120 快點呀 1067 00:46:33,480 --> 00:46:34,960 天賜… 1068 00:46:35,040 --> 00:46:36,240 表哥 1069 00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:37,480 你不會游泳幹嘛要下去？ 1070 00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:38,000 我去找人來 1071 00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:39,280 我去找白花油 1072 00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:40,480 我跟你去 1073 00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:42,480 我到垃圾桶找找看有沒有藥 1074 00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:44,760 天賜… 1075 00:46:46,400 --> 00:46:47,680 我給他做人工呼吸 1076 00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:00,320 幹嘛擋著我，洗衣板 1077 00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:01,880 你給我閃遠一點 1078 00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,600 天賜，你怎麼了？天賜 1079 00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:15,120 是你救我的嗎？ 1080 00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:19,080 你怎麼樣？ 1081 00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:21,360 謝謝你救我 1082 00:47:22,640 --> 00:47:23,880 你是為了救我才這樣的 1083 00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:29,760 對了，你明天晚上有沒有空？ 1084 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,360 到我家來，我明晚有個舞會 1085 00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:40,680 我被騙了，什麼爛錶 1086 00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,680 還會浸水，表哥 1087 00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:44,960 你很吵，你給我下去 1088 00:47:45,440 --> 00:47:49,400 女娃娃女娃娃，一個女娃娃 1089 00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:51,280 這不是黃色歌曲 1090 00:47:51,720 --> 00:47:52,640 是黃色歌曲呀 1091 00:47:52,720 --> 00:47:53,760 要唱黃色歌曲 1092 00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:55,200 有… 1093 00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:56,040 唱呀 1094 00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:59,880 你可以吻吻我，也可以弄弄我 1095 00:47:59,960 --> 00:48:04,320 就算我倆沒緣分，見面也該說哈囉 1096 00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:21,600 那天要謝謝你救了我 1097 00:48:21,960 --> 00:48:25,040 應該的，不過你是我見到女人當中 1098 00:48:25,120 --> 00:48:25,960 最有味道的一個 1099 00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:30,200 這可是第一次有人這麼說我 1100 00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:33,240 以前那些男的只會說 1101 00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:35,240 我是他所認識的女人裡 1102 00:48:35,320 --> 00:48:39,840 最浪的一個，身材最好，最騷 1103 00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:44,960 甚至還有人說我是掃把星 1104 00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:50,880 過去喝點酒，好不好？ 1105 00:48:51,240 --> 00:48:52,000 好 1106 00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:54,120 兩位 1107 00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:55,240 謝謝 1108 00:48:59,080 --> 00:49:00,040 兩位喜歡喝點什麼？ 1109 00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:01,440 兩個Nigo Nigo 1110 00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:02,360 當然 1111 00:49:04,240 --> 00:49:05,240 你剛剛說的是非洲話？ 1112 00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:09,200 不是，是音有點像台灣麻將的一種 1113 00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:11,880 很好玩的，全部都是一對一對的 1114 00:49:12,240 --> 00:49:16,200 用萊姆、伏特加、龍舌蘭 1115 00:49:16,280 --> 00:49:18,000 還有白蘭地 1116 00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:19,560 再加一些特殊的東西 1117 00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:27,720 味道不錯 1118 00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:31,040 謝謝 1119 00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:32,920 你試試看 1120 00:49:35,240 --> 00:49:36,920 好，我希望有個刺激的夜晚 1121 00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:48,200 有什麼感覺？ 1122 00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:51,000 沒有，跟沒喝一樣 1123 00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:52,960 怎麼會呢？多喝一點 1124 00:49:53,960 --> 00:49:54,960 應該會有的 1125 00:49:59,240 --> 00:50:00,000 有了 1126 00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:01,920 有什麼感覺？ 1127 00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:03,200 我的腦袋好像被敲了一下 1128 00:50:03,480 --> 00:50:06,360 你的感覺與眾不同，爽不爽？ 1129 00:50:06,440 --> 00:50:07,200 爽 1130 00:50:36,760 --> 00:50:38,960 糟了，發生什麼事了？ 1131 00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:41,360 我就這樣失身了嗎？ 1132 00:50:41,960 --> 00:50:43,280 我的第一次給了誰？ 1133 00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:45,200 這樣是不是太便宜她了 1134 00:50:46,880 --> 00:50:49,560 莫名其妙失身，我是不是該哭呢 1135 00:51:08,920 --> 00:51:09,640 是她 1136 00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:12,280 老天有眼，如果是她我就賺到了 1137 00:51:22,240 --> 00:51:24,120 我要一個人在這兒好好的靜一靜 1138 00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:26,160 當心會生病 1139 00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:28,920 管他呢 1140 00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:37,640 我從來沒這麼放縱過 1141 00:51:39,280 --> 00:51:40,960 我不是一個隨便的女人 1142 00:51:41,480 --> 00:51:42,600 我也不是一個隨便的人 1143 00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:46,120 我想你的個性應該是很灑脫 1144 00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:48,000 今天晚上的露水姻緣 1145 00:51:48,400 --> 00:51:50,920 到明天太陽一出來 1146 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:52,800 最後你就會把它給忘了 1147 00:51:53,840 --> 00:51:54,960 我不會忘記的 1148 00:51:56,240 --> 00:51:58,000 跟我玩真的你會後悔的 1149 00:52:02,920 --> 00:52:03,640 Shit! 1150 00:52:06,880 --> 00:52:08,960 雨停了，我們到裡面去好嗎？ 1151 00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:09,680 好 1152 00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:11,520 這是什麼雨嘛？ 1153 00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:13,160 來得快去得也快，搞什麼嘛 1154 00:52:15,800 --> 00:52:17,320 雨就像人生一樣 1155 00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:21,440 變幻莫測，今天不知道明天的事 1156 00:52:21,800 --> 00:52:25,280 所以還是把它忘了吧 1157 00:52:26,520 --> 00:52:28,200 不行，我一定要負責到底 1158 00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:31,240 你要負責就讓你負責了嗎？ 1159 00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:33,440 我什麼時候答應過你了 1160 00:52:34,240 --> 00:52:35,200 你不答應我？ 1161 00:52:35,640 --> 00:52:37,080 那就要看你的表現了 1162 00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:41,280 我要你從明天開始，重新追求我 1163 00:52:42,640 --> 00:52:43,840 重新追求你？ 1164 00:52:44,240 --> 00:52:47,720 還有…帶我去見你的家人 1165 00:52:49,840 --> 00:52:52,280 好呀，我們先進去吧 1166 00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:57,640 見你的大頭鬼，白吃那麼多東西 1167 00:52:57,720 --> 00:52:58,960 你的力氣都到哪兒去了？ 1168 00:52:59,680 --> 00:53:01,160 跟抓癢癢一樣嘛 1169 00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:03,640 那我應該怎麼做？ 1170 00:53:03,720 --> 00:53:05,640 我是這邊脖子給扭了 1171 00:53:05,720 --> 00:53:06,800 你應該要輕輕的 1172 00:53:06,880 --> 00:53:09,520 再用點力慢慢的把它推回去 1173 00:53:10,040 --> 00:53:15,200 要用力呀？那簡單了，你小心了 1174 00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:18,160 你怎麼了？ 1175 00:53:19,680 --> 00:53:22,600 你幹什麼呀你？使那麼大勁 1176 00:53:22,920 --> 00:53:25,120 我這是頭不是球 1177 00:53:25,200 --> 00:53:26,760 要不要再來一次？ 1178 00:53:26,840 --> 00:53:28,800 不要…千萬別碰我 1179 00:53:28,880 --> 00:53:30,440 那我去打119 1180 00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:32,760 是要叫靈車還是要叫救護車？ 1181 00:53:32,840 --> 00:53:35,400 死丫頭狗嘴裡吐不出象牙來 1182 00:53:35,480 --> 00:53:36,360 姨媽 1183 00:53:37,560 --> 00:53:38,960 放心，我媽是個大好人，來 1184 00:53:41,640 --> 00:53:42,520 媽，你怎麼了？ 1185 00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:44,200 脖子給扭著了 1186 00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:47,640 媽 1187 00:53:47,720 --> 00:53:48,400 表哥 1188 00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:48,920 伯母 1189 00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:50,040 這位是封小姐 1190 00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:52,520 這一邊 1191 00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:54,520 你好… 1192 00:53:54,600 --> 00:53:57,000 伯母，我以前學過一點按摩 1193 00:53:57,080 --> 00:53:58,520 你有沒有膽子讓我試一下 1194 00:53:58,840 --> 00:53:59,800 你呀？ 1195 00:54:00,880 --> 00:54:04,080 你到底行不行嘛？大姨媽 1196 00:54:05,600 --> 00:54:07,560 伯母，放輕鬆一點 1197 00:54:12,640 --> 00:54:13,200 好了耶 1198 00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:13,920 怎麼樣？ 1199 00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:15,280 功夫真是不錯 1200 00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:19,120 謝謝你…來…坐… 1201 00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:21,080 坐…別客氣 1202 00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:22,960 倒茶去 1203 00:54:23,240 --> 00:54:24,600 要我倒茶給她呀？ 1204 00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:26,080 少囉唆，倒茶去 1205 00:54:28,720 --> 00:54:29,600 天賜 媽 1206 00:54:29,680 --> 00:54:32,640 你是從哪兒找來這麼漂亮的小姐？ 1207 00:54:33,440 --> 00:54:35,000 媽，你覺得她很棒嗎？ 1208 00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:37,960 你媽知道什麼樣的貨色是一流的 1209 00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:43,120 你們認識很久了？ 1210 00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:46,560 沒有多久，不過… 1211 00:54:46,880 --> 00:54:48,080 是好了很久 1212 00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:50,200 在什麼地方上班？ 1213 00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:51,560 我呀？ 1214 00:54:51,800 --> 00:54:53,360 媽，她是一個模特兒 1215 00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:00,800 我昨天踩到狗屎 1216 00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:05,160 胡椒粉、辣椒粉 1217 00:55:10,240 --> 00:55:11,480 五味俱全 1218 00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:22,120 是你呀，怎麼又是你這個洗衣板？ 1219 00:55:23,440 --> 00:55:24,480 天賜在家嗎？ 1220 00:55:27,240 --> 00:55:28,200 小小 1221 00:55:29,000 --> 00:55:29,960 天賜 1222 00:55:31,480 --> 00:55:35,040 大姐大駕光臨真是蓬蓽生輝 1223 00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:37,200 天賜，我有話跟你說 1224 00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:39,000 我們到房裡去談 1225 00:55:41,120 --> 00:55:43,240 幹嘛呀，有話就在客廳裡頭說吧 1226 00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:44,520 他女朋友在這兒 1227 00:55:44,920 --> 00:55:47,520 進房裡頭聊，不怕人家生氣嗎？ 1228 00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:48,680 你們慢慢聊，我去換件衣服 1229 00:55:52,680 --> 00:55:53,920 請坐呀，不要客氣 1230 00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:57,240 靚靚，給大姐大倒杯茶 1231 00:55:57,680 --> 00:55:59,480 我們可不能得罪她喔 1232 00:56:09,400 --> 00:56:11,680 伯母，我知道以前我是太任性了 1233 00:56:11,760 --> 00:56:12,880 全都是我的錯 1234 00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:13,880 我現在向您道歉 1235 00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:17,040 我可擔不起，我哪來這麼大膽子 1236 00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:19,880 我們是正當人家，什麼事都不懂 1237 00:56:20,240 --> 00:56:23,080 搞不好你一翻臉還會給我一頓呢 1238 00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:26,640 伯母，既然她人來了 1239 00:56:26,720 --> 00:56:28,600 一定是有誠意來向你道歉的 1240 00:56:29,120 --> 00:56:32,760 封小姐，很多事情你是不知道的 1241 00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:34,680 總之過去的事情我也不想提了 1242 00:56:34,760 --> 00:56:35,640 我老實告訴你吧 1243 00:56:35,720 --> 00:56:37,320 我不喜歡你跟天賜來往 1244 00:56:37,960 --> 00:56:38,960 為什麼？ 1245 00:56:39,040 --> 00:56:40,520 沒什麼為什麼 1246 00:56:40,600 --> 00:56:43,280 說灑脫呢有咱們靚靚 1247 00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:46,920 說漂亮斯文大方，有咱們封小姐 1248 00:56:47,400 --> 00:56:49,400 再怎麼樣也輪不到你這種 1249 00:56:49,480 --> 00:56:50,920 不三不四的洗衣板 1250 00:56:51,000 --> 00:56:52,040 請你說話乾淨一點 1251 00:56:52,120 --> 00:56:53,360 誰是不三不四的洗衣板？ 1252 00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:55,600 洗衣板，你想怎麼樣，想打架？ 1253 00:56:56,280 --> 00:56:57,000 不要吵了 1254 00:56:57,360 --> 00:56:59,000 好，既然你們全都看不起我 1255 00:56:59,080 --> 00:57:01,120 我也不必尊重你們了，天賜 1256 00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:07,920 救命呀… 1257 00:57:08,000 --> 00:57:08,960 媽，發生什麼事？ 1258 00:57:09,040 --> 00:57:11,120 兒子… 1259 00:57:11,200 --> 00:57:11,720 媽，你怎麼了？ 1260 00:57:11,800 --> 00:57:14,120 你看她在我臉上打了十個手指印 1261 00:57:14,200 --> 00:57:15,760 還抓著我的頭髮去撞牆 1262 00:57:15,840 --> 00:57:18,080 你看看她這個女人多狠心 1263 00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:19,640 你怎麼這樣冤枉我？ 1264 00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:22,200 你怎麼可以這樣子呢？ 1265 00:57:22,280 --> 00:57:23,160 我媽年紀這麼大了 1266 00:57:23,240 --> 00:57:24,560 你居然還下得了手 1267 00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:26,640 林天賜，連你也不相信我 1268 00:57:27,920 --> 00:57:29,240 慕人，到底發生什麼事？ 1269 00:57:32,760 --> 00:57:33,640 我不敢說 1270 00:57:35,000 --> 00:57:36,080 你照實說不就行了 1271 00:57:39,440 --> 00:57:42,320 其實這位小姐是有誠意來道歉的 1272 00:57:42,400 --> 00:57:45,720 伯母可能是對她有點成見 1273 00:57:45,800 --> 00:57:47,480 說話的語氣是重了一點 1274 00:57:48,080 --> 00:57:49,440 你全聽到了 1275 00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:53,440 有誤會可以慢慢解釋的呀 1276 00:57:53,520 --> 00:57:56,360 只是你也沒有道理動手打人哪 1277 00:57:57,000 --> 00:57:58,520 什麼？你… 1278 00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:01,080 你是打她了 1279 00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:03,000 你看你把她打成這個樣子 1280 00:58:03,320 --> 00:58:04,640 你過意得去嗎？ 1281 00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:08,600 小小，你實在太過分了，你… 1282 00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:11,880 林天賜，你他媽帶種 1283 00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:12,680 我會記得你的 1284 00:58:15,240 --> 00:58:17,120 表哥，我去幫你打他 1285 00:58:17,200 --> 00:58:19,160 傻丫頭，人家是打架打大的 1286 00:58:19,240 --> 00:58:21,200 你算什麼東西，憑什麼跟人家鬥 1287 00:58:21,680 --> 00:58:22,440 說得也是 1288 00:58:24,040 --> 00:58:27,400 封小姐，幸虧你站出來說句公道話 1289 00:58:27,480 --> 00:58:29,720 事實如此，還疼不疼？ 1290 00:58:30,520 --> 00:58:33,560 現在沒什麼了，咱們倆還真是有緣 1291 00:58:34,120 --> 00:58:36,160 來…到屋裡頭陪我聊聊 1292 00:58:41,720 --> 00:58:43,440 怎麼都走光了，那我幹什麼？ 1293 00:58:46,640 --> 00:58:50,160 你想成為一個高雅的淑女嗎？ 1294 00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:52,480 戴上了淑女錶 1295 00:58:52,560 --> 00:58:56,160 就能表現出您高雅迷人的氣質 1296 00:58:57,360 --> 00:58:58,360 我們去跳舞吧 1297 00:59:01,960 --> 00:59:02,720 不錯耶 1298 00:59:03,000 --> 00:59:03,800 當然 1299 00:59:04,680 --> 00:59:06,200 我很滿意 1300 00:59:07,160 --> 00:59:08,520 我相信一定可以吸引到 1301 00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:09,760 中下層的顧客 1302 00:59:10,520 --> 00:59:11,560 我希望簽她做我們 1303 00:59:11,640 --> 00:59:13,400 淑女錶的專屬模特兒 1304 00:59:16,240 --> 00:59:17,720 我怕我找不到她 1305 00:59:18,200 --> 00:59:20,360 沒問題，你一定找得到的 1306 00:59:21,560 --> 00:59:22,760 天賜在到處找你 1307 00:59:23,080 --> 00:59:24,360 要你跟他公司簽約 1308 00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:25,520 做長期的模特兒 1309 00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:28,560 你知道我那一天有多憋呀 1310 00:59:29,240 --> 00:59:30,160 那個臭小子居然喜歡 1311 00:59:30,240 --> 00:59:31,760 那個大胸脯的女人 1312 00:59:32,120 --> 00:59:32,960 他媽媽還跟那個女人 1313 00:59:33,040 --> 00:59:34,360 聯合起來陷害我 1314 00:59:35,040 --> 00:59:36,080 我幹嘛給他做模特兒 1315 00:59:37,560 --> 00:59:38,280 還生氣呢？ 1316 00:59:39,400 --> 00:59:41,920 也不看看你自己，來勢洶洶的跑去 1317 00:59:42,000 --> 00:59:43,480 人家還以為你想去打架呢 1318 00:59:44,760 --> 00:59:47,200 你該回過頭來看看你自己 1319 00:59:47,280 --> 00:59:49,160 不要再穿這些不男不女的衣服了 1320 00:59:50,320 --> 00:59:51,680 你為什麼不改變形象 1321 00:59:51,760 --> 00:59:52,920 好好把身材練一練 1322 00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:54,680 再打扮像個淑女的樣子 1323 00:59:55,080 --> 00:59:56,320 你害怕爭不過她呀 1324 00:59:58,040 --> 00:59:59,480 我就是嚥不下這口氣嘛 1325 01:00:00,880 --> 01:00:02,120 既然這樣，就讓我哥哥 1326 01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,160 好好修理他一頓，這總可以了吧 1327 01:00:16,600 --> 01:00:18,840 你的鼻子長的太大要割掉一點 1328 01:00:19,120 --> 01:00:20,800 你的眉毛太粗要拔掉幾根 1329 01:00:20,880 --> 01:00:22,560 你的嘴太歪了要弄正一點 1330 01:00:22,640 --> 01:00:24,080 還有你太高了要砍掉幾吋 1331 01:00:24,840 --> 01:00:25,920 我不是來整容的 1332 01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:26,840 不是來整容 1333 01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:28,600 那你到我這兒來是來消遣我？ 1334 01:00:28,680 --> 01:00:31,440 不是，我是來找一個女孩子 1335 01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:33,760 找女孩子怎麼這個時候來找？ 1336 01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:36,080 如果她還在整容還沒有做好的話 1337 01:00:36,160 --> 01:00:37,800 你一見到她，豈不嚇得你一哆嗦 1338 01:00:38,200 --> 01:00:39,680 我是找樂小小 1339 01:00:40,160 --> 01:00:42,360 樓下是舞廳，大中小隨你樂 1340 01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:44,640 醫生，是她約我來這裡的 1341 01:00:44,720 --> 01:00:45,640 麻煩你幫我找一下 1342 01:00:45,720 --> 01:00:46,840 你當這裡是哪裡？ 1343 01:00:46,920 --> 01:00:48,840 一通電話服務就到，神經病 1344 01:00:49,680 --> 01:00:51,560 好…我認了，你到底想怎麼樣？ 1345 01:00:52,160 --> 01:00:54,000 這才上路，想要見樂小小？ 1346 01:00:54,080 --> 01:00:55,400 除非讓我幫你整容 1347 01:00:55,480 --> 01:00:58,120 整容？我哪裡需要整呀 1348 01:00:58,200 --> 01:00:59,240 下面也可以整 1349 01:00:59,320 --> 01:01:00,480 下面？到目前為止 1350 01:01:00,560 --> 01:01:02,040 我對我的下面非常滿意的 1351 01:01:02,320 --> 01:01:03,280 那我幫你加顆痣怎麼樣？ 1352 01:01:03,360 --> 01:01:07,600 痣？好…整… 1353 01:01:07,680 --> 01:01:08,320 等一下 1354 01:01:13,240 --> 01:01:14,360 我替你修理他 1355 01:01:15,320 --> 01:01:16,480 不必給我留面子了 1356 01:01:26,840 --> 01:01:29,600 醫生，加一顆痣需要這麼多工具？ 1357 01:01:30,600 --> 01:01:33,040 這哪算多，才奪命十三針 1358 01:01:34,440 --> 01:01:35,720 那你也太誇張了吧 1359 01:01:35,800 --> 01:01:38,560 怕打針？那我先替你打一支麻醉針 1360 01:01:40,240 --> 01:01:41,760 好吧，打… 1361 01:01:45,960 --> 01:01:47,360 這麼大那就算了吧 1362 01:01:48,320 --> 01:01:49,480 這一支叫開路先鋒 1363 01:01:49,560 --> 01:01:51,080 打完了之後打什麼針都不疼了 1364 01:01:51,160 --> 01:01:51,960 怕就把臉轉過去 1365 01:01:52,040 --> 01:01:52,480 不是，我… 1366 01:01:52,560 --> 01:01:53,640 快點呀 1367 01:01:59,320 --> 01:02:00,520 我打 1368 01:02:06,720 --> 01:02:07,320 還痛呀？ 1369 01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:08,520 我左手換右手，右手換左手 1370 01:02:08,600 --> 01:02:10,800 我再替你補一針，我打 1371 01:02:17,280 --> 01:02:17,840 你知不知道 1372 01:02:17,920 --> 01:02:19,280 我以前在國外得過獎？ 1373 01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:20,720 是飛針冠軍獎 1374 01:02:21,160 --> 01:02:22,400 把褲子脫掉，快點 1375 01:02:22,800 --> 01:02:25,480 還要脫褲子？為什麼要脫褲子？ 1376 01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:27,360 快點脫褲子，真是的 1377 01:02:27,640 --> 01:02:28,880 沒見過一個大男人脫褲子 1378 01:02:28,960 --> 01:02:30,120 那麼彆彆扭扭的 1379 01:02:30,840 --> 01:02:32,000 捱針的又不是你 1380 01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:35,800 慘了 1381 01:02:37,120 --> 01:02:38,080 要打得快 1382 01:02:38,160 --> 01:02:40,240 獨眼反手，無敵針 1383 01:02:46,640 --> 01:02:47,720 誰呀？… 1384 01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:49,480 是不是小小？ 1385 01:02:50,520 --> 01:02:51,920 快點把針筒拿出來 1386 01:02:53,520 --> 01:02:54,200 小小 1387 01:02:55,880 --> 01:02:58,680 小小…原來你在這裡？ 1388 01:02:59,320 --> 01:03:00,640 你找我幹什麼？ 1389 01:03:00,880 --> 01:03:01,720 簽約 1390 01:03:02,760 --> 01:03:03,760 你找你媽和封小姐 1391 01:03:03,840 --> 01:03:05,760 做模特兒不就行了，我哪夠資格？ 1392 01:03:07,040 --> 01:03:08,640 沒有感情，起碼還有友情 1393 01:03:08,720 --> 01:03:09,840 我的老闆很欣賞你 1394 01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:11,960 叫我一定要請你回去簽個長約 1395 01:03:13,360 --> 01:03:14,240 做模特兒拍廣告 1396 01:03:15,480 --> 01:03:17,040 先打完這一針再解釋 1397 01:03:17,520 --> 01:03:18,800 不用了吧，醫生 1398 01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:21,080 誰說的？這兒哪有你說話的份哪 1399 01:03:21,160 --> 01:03:22,000 好，我不說 1400 01:03:22,080 --> 01:03:23,200 好，你要是有誠意 1401 01:03:23,280 --> 01:03:24,640 就讓我來給你打這一針 1402 01:03:24,720 --> 01:03:26,080 你肯不肯？ 1403 01:03:26,480 --> 01:03:27,000 來呀 1404 01:03:27,080 --> 01:03:28,320 打在胳肢窩上 1405 01:03:38,560 --> 01:03:40,920 為了表示我對你的誠意，打吧 1406 01:03:42,800 --> 01:03:44,840 把手放下來吧，你有狐臭 1407 01:03:46,360 --> 01:03:47,120 小小 1408 01:03:49,360 --> 01:03:51,840 那就是說我可以不用打這一針了 1409 01:03:53,680 --> 01:03:55,480 你也答應跟我簽約了？ 1410 01:03:58,200 --> 01:03:59,120 太好了 1411 01:04:01,560 --> 01:04:02,800 你不要佔我便宜呀 1412 01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:04,640 好多毛呀 1413 01:04:10,320 --> 01:04:12,680 他昨天去找樂小小，你知不知道？ 1414 01:04:13,080 --> 01:04:14,200 知道呀 1415 01:04:14,360 --> 01:04:16,320 那你還有心情做臉？ 1416 01:04:17,000 --> 01:04:18,480 難道你叫我哭呀？ 1417 01:04:18,560 --> 01:04:19,280 想想辦法嘛 1418 01:04:19,360 --> 01:04:21,040 不要讓那個女的破壞我們的好事 1419 01:04:21,360 --> 01:04:22,880 天賜約了我去看婚紗表演 1420 01:05:21,600 --> 01:05:23,360 這件衣服的款式不錯 1421 01:05:24,040 --> 01:05:28,320 不過沒什麼特別，我不太喜歡 1422 01:05:30,560 --> 01:05:33,120 我們只是來參觀，又沒有人叫你買 1423 01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:38,160 可是我們將來結婚一定要特別點 1424 01:05:39,080 --> 01:05:39,800 你看著辦吧 1425 01:05:46,240 --> 01:05:51,040 好漂亮 1426 01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:02,880 是小小，怎麼突然變這麼漂亮 1427 01:06:10,520 --> 01:06:13,240 真漂亮喔 1428 01:06:16,040 --> 01:06:16,640 不好意思 1429 01:06:24,560 --> 01:06:25,640 林先生嗎？ 1430 01:06:25,920 --> 01:06:26,760 是呀 1431 01:06:26,840 --> 01:06:27,960 小小叫我交給你 1432 01:06:32,720 --> 01:06:35,280 天賜，今天晚上十點鐘 1433 01:06:35,360 --> 01:06:37,400 在盪鞦韆那裡見面 1434 01:06:37,480 --> 01:06:42,760 希望見到你 1435 01:06:51,200 --> 01:06:52,120 小小 1436 01:06:57,320 --> 01:06:58,040 來 1437 01:07:04,160 --> 01:07:05,880 你今天怎麼會在時裝表演會出現 1438 01:07:07,680 --> 01:07:10,000 只有你的封慕人能當模特兒嗎？ 1439 01:07:10,080 --> 01:07:11,480 不，我不是這個意思 1440 01:07:11,560 --> 01:07:12,600 我是說… 1441 01:07:12,680 --> 01:07:14,360 能看到我的好朋友在台上表演 1442 01:07:14,440 --> 01:07:15,560 我覺得很高興 1443 01:07:16,640 --> 01:07:18,200 你們男人真會口是心非 1444 01:07:18,680 --> 01:07:20,640 要不是還有點喜歡我 1445 01:07:20,720 --> 01:07:22,400 你不會到後台去找我 1446 01:07:22,480 --> 01:07:23,560 更不會到這兒來了 1447 01:07:25,440 --> 01:07:27,800 到底我們還是好朋友，對不對？ 1448 01:07:29,520 --> 01:07:32,160 男女之間很少有真正的友情 1449 01:07:32,600 --> 01:07:34,160 你說謊的技巧並不高明 1450 01:07:34,240 --> 01:07:35,880 最好老實說 1451 01:07:36,640 --> 01:07:38,880 你到底是喜歡封慕人還是我 1452 01:07:39,160 --> 01:07:40,360 想想清楚 1453 01:07:40,800 --> 01:07:42,560 我不喜歡拖泥帶水的 1454 01:07:51,840 --> 01:07:52,560 喂？ 1455 01:07:52,640 --> 01:07:54,040 他真的來跟樂小小見面了 1456 01:07:54,840 --> 01:07:56,960 那怎麼辦？我馬上過來幫你 1457 01:07:57,040 --> 01:07:59,320 我看你有病，又不是要打架 1458 01:08:02,520 --> 01:08:05,440 喂… 1459 01:08:06,720 --> 01:08:08,520 又失靈了，氣死人了 1460 01:08:16,000 --> 01:08:17,040 你說呀 1461 01:08:17,120 --> 01:08:18,120 我… 1462 01:08:24,160 --> 01:08:26,960 小小，我跟慕人發生了關係 1463 01:08:27,040 --> 01:08:28,640 我對她一定要負責任的 1464 01:08:29,400 --> 01:08:30,400 關係？ 1465 01:08:30,680 --> 01:08:32,000 是呀 1466 01:08:33,960 --> 01:08:37,080 在一個風雨交加的夜晚 1467 01:08:37,160 --> 01:08:38,840 我多喝了兩杯 1468 01:08:38,920 --> 01:08:41,760 我一睜開眼睛就睡在她床上了 1469 01:08:42,920 --> 01:08:44,240 這就算發生關係了？ 1470 01:08:44,760 --> 01:08:46,120 她說她第一次給了我 1471 01:08:47,080 --> 01:08:49,120 既然是她的第一次 1472 01:08:49,200 --> 01:08:50,280 你總應該有感覺 1473 01:08:50,360 --> 01:08:51,520 你沒讀過生理衛生？ 1474 01:08:53,080 --> 01:08:54,720 對呀，我沒有看到床單上有血 1475 01:08:55,280 --> 01:08:56,680 我看你是叫她給騙了 1476 01:08:58,520 --> 01:08:59,320 不會吧 1477 01:08:59,880 --> 01:09:01,120 天賜 1478 01:09:01,640 --> 01:09:02,800 慕人 1479 01:09:03,080 --> 01:09:04,200 真沒想到 1480 01:09:04,280 --> 01:09:06,200 你居然瞞著我跟別的女人見面 1481 01:09:06,600 --> 01:09:07,840 還敢懷疑我騙你 1482 01:09:08,280 --> 01:09:10,160 這麼沒良心的話你都說得出來 1483 01:09:11,200 --> 01:09:11,920 好 1484 01:09:16,280 --> 01:09:17,920 這顆毒藥 1485 01:09:18,000 --> 01:09:20,080 是我準備你在背叛我的時候吃的 1486 01:09:22,280 --> 01:09:23,440 今天正好用上 1487 01:09:24,000 --> 01:09:26,080 這麼大一顆，我看是維他命C 1488 01:09:30,120 --> 01:09:31,240 來世再見了 1489 01:09:32,920 --> 01:09:34,120 慕人… 1490 01:09:34,200 --> 01:09:35,000 天賜 1491 01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:36,160 慕人 1492 01:09:43,760 --> 01:09:44,960 怎麼還不跟來呢？ 1493 01:09:46,520 --> 01:09:49,840 這個死瑪麗亞，叫她去買顆藥丸 1494 01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:51,320 怎麼買這麼大顆呢？ 1495 01:10:06,000 --> 01:10:06,680 怎麼樣了？ 1496 01:10:07,440 --> 01:10:08,600 幹什麼… 1497 01:10:09,760 --> 01:10:12,000 我知道，你牙白，你舌頭很長 1498 01:10:18,560 --> 01:10:19,120 喂 1499 01:10:19,200 --> 01:10:20,800 天賜 1500 01:10:21,720 --> 01:10:23,840 慕人，怎麼了？怪怪的 1501 01:10:24,440 --> 01:10:27,040 天賜，我知道你仍然深愛著 1502 01:10:27,120 --> 01:10:29,400 你以前的女朋友，對不對？ 1503 01:10:30,400 --> 01:10:31,360 你說什麼？ 1504 01:10:32,200 --> 01:10:34,480 是不是我媽又跟你嘮叨些什麼了？ 1505 01:10:34,920 --> 01:10:38,560 不是，我好累 1506 01:10:40,160 --> 01:10:41,600 累了你就休息一下 1507 01:10:41,920 --> 01:10:44,120 你以後再也看不到我了 1508 01:10:44,200 --> 01:10:45,680 我想睡覺 1509 01:10:46,960 --> 01:10:47,680 那你睡吧 1510 01:10:47,760 --> 01:10:50,160 我吃了一瓶安眠藥會睡得好 1511 01:10:50,240 --> 01:10:53,800 什麼？慕人… 1512 01:10:54,640 --> 01:10:58,240 安眠藥，慕人…自殺… 1513 01:10:59,320 --> 01:11:01,240 快一點，你馬子在等你 1514 01:11:01,480 --> 01:11:03,320 慕人自殺了 1515 01:11:06,520 --> 01:11:07,160 自殺 1516 01:11:18,800 --> 01:11:21,320 慕人… 1517 01:11:23,360 --> 01:11:24,560 慕人 1518 01:11:27,040 --> 01:11:28,160 慕人 1519 01:11:34,320 --> 01:11:38,240 慕人… 1520 01:11:38,320 --> 01:11:39,720 你醒一醒… 1521 01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:41,080 我是不是已經死了？ 1522 01:11:41,160 --> 01:11:45,280 慕人… 1523 01:11:45,920 --> 01:11:47,320 我還沒死呀？ 1524 01:11:47,400 --> 01:11:48,400 你沒有死 1525 01:11:50,520 --> 01:11:51,480 我帶你去洗胃 1526 01:12:05,600 --> 01:12:08,480 慕人，你沒事吧？有沒有摔痛你 1527 01:12:08,560 --> 01:12:10,760 你忍耐一下，我馬上送你去醫院 1528 01:12:12,480 --> 01:12:16,480 何必呢？你喜歡的是樂小小 1529 01:12:16,560 --> 01:12:17,600 我… 1530 01:12:17,680 --> 01:12:24,560 我…也只有半年好活了 1531 01:12:27,080 --> 01:12:30,400 你救了我也是沒用的 1532 01:12:30,480 --> 01:12:31,080 我還是成全你 1533 01:12:31,160 --> 01:12:32,320 慕人，你胡說些什麼？ 1534 01:12:33,720 --> 01:12:38,520 我有血癌，只能活半年了 1535 01:12:40,280 --> 01:12:41,920 我一直沒有跟人說 1536 01:12:42,000 --> 01:12:45,840 慕人，你… 1537 01:12:46,640 --> 01:12:48,240 你為什麼不告訴我？ 1538 01:12:50,040 --> 01:12:51,880 告訴你有什麼用呢？ 1539 01:12:51,960 --> 01:12:52,800 當然有用了 1540 01:12:57,360 --> 01:12:58,920 慕人，你放心好了 1541 01:12:59,000 --> 01:13:00,000 我一定會娶你的 1542 01:13:00,080 --> 01:13:01,720 我要讓你開開心心過完這半年 1543 01:13:02,000 --> 01:13:03,160 你不准騙我 1544 01:13:03,240 --> 01:13:05,160 我絕對不會騙你，我發誓 1545 01:13:13,080 --> 01:13:15,480 你多休息，我會陪你的 1546 01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:22,880 你搬到我家來住好不好？ 1547 01:13:23,680 --> 01:13:24,480 好不好嘛？ 1548 01:13:24,560 --> 01:13:25,640 好 1549 01:13:32,840 --> 01:13:34,080 臭死了 1550 01:13:35,360 --> 01:13:38,360 這是三鞭四物五福湯，很補人的 1551 01:13:39,400 --> 01:13:41,080 我用十碗水把它熬成三碗 1552 01:13:41,160 --> 01:13:42,520 給你未來的表嫂喝 1553 01:13:45,080 --> 01:13:47,520 待會好了我還得馬上給她送過去 1554 01:13:48,320 --> 01:13:49,280 那我要跟你去 1555 01:13:49,360 --> 01:13:50,920 少囉唆，你給我待在家裡 1556 01:13:55,040 --> 01:13:55,360 瑪麗亞 1557 01:13:55,440 --> 01:13:56,320 你好，太太 1558 01:13:56,400 --> 01:13:57,600 小姐他們在不在？ 1559 01:13:57,680 --> 01:13:59,520 我特地給她送湯過來的 1560 01:13:59,600 --> 01:14:00,400 他們不在家 1561 01:14:00,480 --> 01:14:02,160 我要去超級市場 1562 01:14:02,400 --> 01:14:04,280 好…你去 1563 01:14:15,280 --> 01:14:17,040 慕人…我是Robert 1564 01:14:17,120 --> 01:14:17,960 你真帥 1565 01:14:18,040 --> 01:14:20,400 把林天賜那個呆子耍得團團轉 1566 01:14:20,480 --> 01:14:22,440 我趁他不在才打電話給你 1567 01:14:22,520 --> 01:14:24,720 對了，第二期款二十萬美金 1568 01:14:24,800 --> 01:14:26,560 我已經存進你瑞士銀行的戶頭了 1569 01:14:26,640 --> 01:14:28,480 只要過了下個月一號 1570 01:14:28,560 --> 01:14:31,680 還有結婚之前要好好整整那小子 1571 01:14:31,760 --> 01:14:35,040 事成之後我另外再加五十萬美金 1572 01:14:36,160 --> 01:14:39,160 你真不愧是第一號的愛情女殺手 1573 01:14:40,280 --> 01:14:42,800 對了，記得，錄音帶要洗掉 1574 01:14:42,880 --> 01:14:43,360 拜拜 1575 01:14:43,440 --> 01:14:44,520 這下子可糟了 1576 01:14:45,120 --> 01:14:47,280 原來那個封小姐 1577 01:14:47,360 --> 01:14:49,720 跟死羅拔兩個人是串通好的 1578 01:14:51,000 --> 01:14:52,760 好險，差點上他們的當 1579 01:14:52,920 --> 01:14:54,120 快告訴天賜 1580 01:14:55,400 --> 01:14:57,160 做了什麼虧心事了？ 1581 01:14:57,440 --> 01:14:58,600 幹嘛嚇成這樣？ 1582 01:15:00,120 --> 01:15:02,080 你還想惡人先告狀 1583 01:15:02,520 --> 01:15:03,960 你的心腸也太毒了吧 1584 01:15:04,040 --> 01:15:06,000 虛情假意的來騙我兒子 1585 01:15:06,280 --> 01:15:06,680 聰明的話你快滾 1586 01:15:06,760 --> 01:15:08,840 不要再纏著我兒子了 1587 01:15:08,920 --> 01:15:09,720 否則我拼了命 1588 01:15:09,800 --> 01:15:11,920 也要把你這狐狸精給趕出去 1589 01:15:12,240 --> 01:15:14,440 你搞清楚了，老太婆 1590 01:15:15,120 --> 01:15:16,440 這可是我家喲 1591 01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:20,320 你家又怎麼樣？ 1592 01:15:20,600 --> 01:15:21,880 你當我不敢打你是不是？ 1593 01:15:21,960 --> 01:15:22,760 試試看了 1594 01:15:22,840 --> 01:15:23,560 我打你 1595 01:15:28,040 --> 01:15:29,040 還打不打？ 1596 01:15:29,120 --> 01:15:31,960 好狠，你想摔死我呀 1597 01:15:32,040 --> 01:15:33,640 不摔你摔誰呀？ 1598 01:15:34,360 --> 01:15:35,200 你弄清楚 1599 01:15:35,280 --> 01:15:38,000 我是美國西岸女子柔道的亞軍 1600 01:15:38,720 --> 01:15:41,040 有沒有興趣再來一回合 1601 01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:42,800 你不要碰我… 1602 01:15:42,880 --> 01:15:45,360 等我兒子回來以後我要你好看 1603 01:15:46,840 --> 01:15:50,560 救命呀… 1604 01:15:50,640 --> 01:15:51,160 我的頭 1605 01:15:51,240 --> 01:15:52,240 痛不痛？ 1606 01:15:53,840 --> 01:15:56,000 你這個老太婆，你去死吧 1607 01:15:56,080 --> 01:15:57,920 你那一套少用在我身上 1608 01:15:58,000 --> 01:15:58,880 天賜 1609 01:16:01,560 --> 01:16:04,200 慕人… 1610 01:16:04,280 --> 01:16:05,000 我兒子 1611 01:16:05,080 --> 01:16:07,840 慕人… 1612 01:16:07,920 --> 01:16:08,960 我回來了 1613 01:16:15,400 --> 01:16:18,120 兒子，這個狐狸精她… 1614 01:16:18,600 --> 01:16:20,040 慕人，發生什麼事了？ 1615 01:16:20,520 --> 01:16:22,960 我…我沒事 1616 01:16:23,040 --> 01:16:23,840 你的臉怎麼了？ 1617 01:16:24,880 --> 01:16:26,520 不小心撞傷的 1618 01:16:27,000 --> 01:16:28,680 撞傷？那怎麼會有手印？ 1619 01:16:29,520 --> 01:16:31,160 我… 1620 01:16:31,240 --> 01:16:32,040 你的頭 1621 01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:34,440 媽 1622 01:16:34,520 --> 01:16:36,920 怎麼，你看我幹什麼？ 1623 01:16:37,160 --> 01:16:38,520 你相信她還是相信我呀？ 1624 01:16:38,840 --> 01:16:40,240 她是自己打自己 1625 01:16:40,800 --> 01:16:42,800 媽，你是怎麼搞的？ 1626 01:16:42,880 --> 01:16:44,400 上次你跟小小吵架自己打自己 1627 01:16:44,480 --> 01:16:45,680 我都沒有說什麼 1628 01:16:45,760 --> 01:16:46,720 這次你又欺負慕人 1629 01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:48,320 你到底要我怎麼做？你說呀 1630 01:16:50,040 --> 01:16:51,720 兒子，連你也護著這個狐狸精 1631 01:16:51,800 --> 01:16:52,880 是不是？ 1632 01:16:53,760 --> 01:16:55,400 我不管了，你們自己解決 1633 01:16:56,680 --> 01:17:02,200 兒子，天賜… 1634 01:17:03,280 --> 01:17:04,120 小小 1635 01:17:06,240 --> 01:17:08,840 我們又不熟，幹嘛叫得那麼親熱 1636 01:17:11,800 --> 01:17:14,400 你說得對，樂小姐 1637 01:17:14,480 --> 01:17:16,000 我們之間的事 1638 01:17:16,080 --> 01:17:17,920 你就不要放在心上了，好吧 1639 01:17:18,000 --> 01:17:18,520 我們之間 1640 01:17:18,600 --> 01:17:20,280 好像沒有發生過什麼事吧 1641 01:17:22,040 --> 01:17:24,520 這一切都怪我這老太婆 1642 01:17:24,800 --> 01:17:26,360 瞎了我的眼珠子 1643 01:17:26,440 --> 01:17:28,000 中了那女人的計 1644 01:17:28,080 --> 01:17:30,520 被她的胡言亂語給騙了 1645 01:17:30,600 --> 01:17:33,760 現在天賜又被她迷得神魂顛倒的 1646 01:17:33,840 --> 01:17:37,560 除了你，沒有人能夠救得了我兒子 1647 01:17:38,280 --> 01:17:40,200 怎麼你突然間這麼看得起我了？ 1648 01:17:40,480 --> 01:17:43,120 不怕我這個洗衣板、大老千 1649 01:17:43,200 --> 01:17:45,360 還不三不四的大姐頭 1650 01:17:45,440 --> 01:17:47,000 會帶壞了你的兒子嗎？ 1651 01:17:47,600 --> 01:17:49,160 救他？憑我也配？ 1652 01:17:50,240 --> 01:17:52,720 老妹，你不要怕，老哥支持你 1653 01:17:53,920 --> 01:17:54,280 長劍哥 1654 01:17:54,360 --> 01:17:55,720 武大郎，我還沒揍你呢？ 1655 01:17:56,480 --> 01:17:57,520 大哥 1656 01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:00,480 伯母，我想真的幫不了你 1657 01:18:00,880 --> 01:18:02,640 只怪我們沒福分了 1658 01:18:02,720 --> 01:18:05,840 眼巴巴的看著那三億美金的遺產 1659 01:18:05,920 --> 01:18:07,360 就這麼泡湯了 1660 01:18:08,160 --> 01:18:09,480 你再說一次 1661 01:18:11,000 --> 01:18:13,240 我就老老實實的跟你們說了吧 1662 01:18:13,320 --> 01:18:15,120 天賜的祖父給他留下了 1663 01:18:15,200 --> 01:18:16,600 三億美金的遺產 1664 01:18:17,160 --> 01:18:19,480 而且限天賜十天以內結婚 1665 01:18:19,560 --> 01:18:20,800 如果是沒結成 1666 01:18:20,880 --> 01:18:23,240 就把所有的錢都給了死鬼羅拔 1667 01:18:23,760 --> 01:18:25,960 那個狐狸精就是羅拔給找來的 1668 01:18:26,400 --> 01:18:27,320 親家母 1669 01:18:29,840 --> 01:18:30,640 你怎麼不早說呢？ 1670 01:18:30,720 --> 01:18:32,760 錢財對我來說跟衛生紙沒兩樣 1671 01:18:32,840 --> 01:18:34,520 我這個人講的就是義氣 1672 01:18:34,600 --> 01:18:36,760 你受這麼大委屈，我都不能忍了 1673 01:18:37,240 --> 01:18:38,560 老妹，你不幫親家母 1674 01:18:38,640 --> 01:18:41,560 還有誰能幫呢？何況我們還是親家 1675 01:18:41,640 --> 01:18:42,160 大哥 1676 01:18:42,240 --> 01:18:44,160 你不要說，我告訴你 1677 01:18:44,240 --> 01:18:45,680 我們樂家無論是賭六合彩 1678 01:18:45,760 --> 01:18:47,480 跑馬、打麻將跟人單挑 1679 01:18:47,560 --> 01:18:49,960 從來就沒輸過，何況是爭個男人 1680 01:18:50,480 --> 01:18:52,240 爭到了不喜歡把他扔到馬桶裡 1681 01:18:52,320 --> 01:18:53,240 這一定要爭 1682 01:18:57,160 --> 01:18:58,720 老妹，你一定要鎮定 1683 01:18:58,800 --> 01:19:00,240 老哥現在陪你去談判 1684 01:19:00,320 --> 01:19:01,800 你什麼都不要怕，進去 1685 01:19:04,440 --> 01:19:06,400 開門… 1686 01:19:06,680 --> 01:19:07,720 先生早 1687 01:19:07,800 --> 01:19:08,880 你混哪裡的？ 1688 01:19:08,960 --> 01:19:10,800 大哥，那是她傭人瑪麗亞 1689 01:19:11,080 --> 01:19:12,920 那就是她手下，我先唬她一下 1690 01:19:13,480 --> 01:19:15,080 我看你不順眼，馬上消失 1691 01:19:15,160 --> 01:19:16,200 要不然砍了你 1692 01:19:17,480 --> 01:19:18,680 她怕了，走，進去 1693 01:19:26,440 --> 01:19:28,440 樂小姐，那位是… 1694 01:19:28,720 --> 01:19:29,680 我是她老哥 1695 01:19:30,560 --> 01:19:31,440 兩位請坐 1696 01:19:39,000 --> 01:19:41,200 我不浪費大家的時間，直話直說 1697 01:19:41,280 --> 01:19:42,040 夠爽快 1698 01:19:42,880 --> 01:19:45,280 其實我是想放你一馬的 1699 01:19:51,520 --> 01:19:52,640 我希望你放過天賜 1700 01:19:53,520 --> 01:19:54,760 他是一個很單純的人 1701 01:19:55,040 --> 01:19:56,480 你根本就在玩愛情的遊戲 1702 01:19:56,560 --> 01:19:58,280 你又何必要傷害到他的感情呢 1703 01:19:58,360 --> 01:20:02,040 是，開始我是在騙他 1704 01:20:02,120 --> 01:20:05,720 但是在過程中，我動了真感情 1705 01:20:07,560 --> 01:20:10,280 我們結婚絕對不是為了錢 1706 01:20:11,680 --> 01:20:13,320 還有三天我們就要結婚了 1707 01:20:14,480 --> 01:20:16,960 我求求你，不要拆散我們 1708 01:20:17,040 --> 01:20:18,200 你叫我怎麼相信你？ 1709 01:20:18,280 --> 01:20:20,600 對呀，那臭小子怎麼能滿足你？ 1710 01:20:20,680 --> 01:20:22,240 哥哥我就比他強多了 1711 01:20:22,920 --> 01:20:25,360 樂小姐，我是真心的 1712 01:20:27,320 --> 01:20:28,800 不管你答不答應 1713 01:20:29,840 --> 01:20:32,600 我們喝杯酒，交個朋友好不好？ 1714 01:20:36,400 --> 01:20:39,120 你那麼瘦小，力氣不夠，我來幫你 1715 01:20:41,160 --> 01:20:41,840 謝謝 1716 01:20:48,400 --> 01:20:49,160 喝一杯吧 1717 01:20:49,240 --> 01:20:49,920 不必了 1718 01:20:50,400 --> 01:20:52,400 我不會笨到放棄我自己喜歡的人 1719 01:20:52,800 --> 01:20:54,440 更沒有興趣跟你這種人交朋友 1720 01:20:55,040 --> 01:20:57,720 如你不肯放棄的話我會跟你爭到底 1721 01:20:58,120 --> 01:20:59,200 大哥，走 1722 01:21:08,120 --> 01:21:11,160 老妹，這不能怪我們，她不肯放棄 1723 01:21:11,240 --> 01:21:12,080 我們只好奉陪了 1724 01:21:12,280 --> 01:21:14,960 救命呀… 1725 01:21:15,040 --> 01:21:17,760 搶劫，不要放他們走 1726 01:21:17,840 --> 01:21:18,320 不要走 1727 01:21:18,400 --> 01:21:18,880 幹什麼？ 1728 01:21:18,960 --> 01:21:21,560 他打破我的頭，他搶了我的首飾 1729 01:21:21,640 --> 01:21:22,920 誰打破你的頭，誰搶你的首飾？ 1730 01:21:23,000 --> 01:21:23,960 在他的口袋裡 1731 01:21:24,400 --> 01:21:25,840 我什麼時候搶你首飾了？ 1732 01:21:25,920 --> 01:21:26,800 你哪裡有首飾？ 1733 01:21:27,280 --> 01:21:27,920 這是什麼？ 1734 01:21:28,960 --> 01:21:31,520 快一點，快把他們捉到警察局去呀 1735 01:21:31,760 --> 01:21:32,520 走 1736 01:21:40,120 --> 01:21:41,240 早安 1737 01:21:42,920 --> 01:21:43,640 瑪麗亞 1738 01:21:43,720 --> 01:21:44,480 是的，小姐 1739 01:21:47,760 --> 01:21:48,400 你在幹嘛？ 1740 01:21:48,680 --> 01:21:49,440 先生 1741 01:21:50,720 --> 01:21:53,000 試禮服，你沒看到？ 1742 01:21:54,600 --> 01:21:57,200 你真有職業道德，演得跟真的一樣 1743 01:21:59,400 --> 01:22:01,240 現在只要把時間給抓準 1744 01:22:01,720 --> 01:22:04,120 十一點五十五分你們倆走近教堂 1745 01:22:04,760 --> 01:22:06,760 我不嫁，他就一無所有 1746 01:22:06,960 --> 01:22:08,760 我的錢到手，任務完成 1747 01:22:08,840 --> 01:22:11,640 對不起，我改變主意了 1748 01:22:12,280 --> 01:22:14,760 什麼，什麼意思？請你解釋一下 1749 01:22:15,520 --> 01:22:17,480 我決定今天嫁給天賜了 1750 01:22:18,200 --> 01:22:19,040 你在開玩笑呀你 1751 01:22:19,480 --> 01:22:21,120 這個遊戲我不想再玩下去了 1752 01:22:21,840 --> 01:22:24,120 你給我五十萬美金 1753 01:22:24,360 --> 01:22:25,880 但是我嫁給天賜 1754 01:22:25,960 --> 01:22:28,080 不但可以得到三億美金 1755 01:22:28,160 --> 01:22:29,680 還可以得到真情 1756 01:22:30,520 --> 01:22:32,760 就算我跟天賜離婚 1757 01:22:32,840 --> 01:22:34,720 起碼還可以得到一億五千萬 1758 01:22:35,280 --> 01:22:38,160 你說我這個帳，算得對不對？ 1759 01:22:38,240 --> 01:22:39,840 你… 1760 01:22:41,440 --> 01:22:42,360 不可以說粗話 1761 01:22:50,080 --> 01:22:51,040 忘了告訴你了 1762 01:22:51,400 --> 01:22:53,640 我在你的茶裡放了安眠藥了 1763 01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:55,280 晚安 1764 01:23:04,880 --> 01:23:06,520 伯母，開心一點嘛 1765 01:23:07,600 --> 01:23:09,040 我怎麼能開心呢？ 1766 01:23:10,120 --> 01:23:13,880 不讓他結婚這遺產就泡湯了 1767 01:23:13,960 --> 01:23:16,760 讓他結婚，我的命也差不多了 1768 01:23:17,720 --> 01:23:20,240 在他們兩個人還沒有說我願意之前 1769 01:23:20,320 --> 01:23:21,520 都還有希望的呀 1770 01:23:22,880 --> 01:23:24,840 這是一間教堂 1771 01:23:24,920 --> 01:23:27,000 就算觀音菩薩肯救我 1772 01:23:27,080 --> 01:23:28,720 祂也不好意思走進來 1773 01:23:34,360 --> 01:23:35,000 怎麼了？ 1774 01:23:35,840 --> 01:23:37,720 突然一下，我會想小小 1775 01:23:38,680 --> 01:23:40,480 你想她幹嘛，你馬上要結婚了 1776 01:23:45,600 --> 01:23:46,600 不知道他們兩個 1777 01:23:46,680 --> 01:23:47,680 在警察局會怎麼樣？ 1778 01:23:48,240 --> 01:23:49,240 不會有事的 1779 01:23:51,040 --> 01:23:53,680 不是…我不知道他為什麼要搶劫 1780 01:23:54,320 --> 01:23:55,160 我也不知道 1781 01:23:55,960 --> 01:23:58,440 為什麼小小要在你結婚的前一天 1782 01:23:58,520 --> 01:24:00,200 跑去搶那個封小姐的東西？ 1783 01:24:01,120 --> 01:24:02,120 好了… 1784 01:24:04,000 --> 01:24:05,720 這有什麼好奇怪的 1785 01:24:05,800 --> 01:24:07,640 臭婊子還能幹出什麼好事 1786 01:24:08,800 --> 01:24:10,000 夠了，我不准你罵她 1787 01:24:13,680 --> 01:24:14,360 尿尿 1788 01:24:16,720 --> 01:24:18,200 小小的個性雖然外向一點 1789 01:24:18,280 --> 01:24:19,200 但是絕對不會去搶劫 1790 01:24:19,520 --> 01:24:21,200 我也是這麼想的，我看是被冤枉的 1791 01:24:23,200 --> 01:24:24,160 我真的希望她在這裡 1792 01:24:24,400 --> 01:24:25,000 能夠問個明白 1793 01:24:25,080 --> 01:24:25,480 是呀 1794 01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:27,000 有什麼好問的？不許動 1795 01:24:27,080 --> 01:24:27,760 老大 1796 01:24:27,840 --> 01:24:28,840 不許叫我老大 1797 01:24:29,120 --> 01:24:30,840 叫老大就不用捱揍了？ 1798 01:24:30,920 --> 01:24:32,960 臭小子，居然把我妹妹給甩了 1799 01:24:33,040 --> 01:24:35,480 想跟別人結婚，小心我把它給閹了 1800 01:24:35,560 --> 01:24:36,560 老大，不行呀 1801 01:24:36,640 --> 01:24:38,400 丟到馬桶裡面水一沖就沒了 1802 01:24:38,480 --> 01:24:39,280 再吵連你一塊閹 1803 01:24:39,360 --> 01:24:40,280 是… 1804 01:24:40,840 --> 01:24:41,960 王八蛋 1805 01:24:42,040 --> 01:24:42,560 小小呢？ 1806 01:24:42,640 --> 01:24:44,320 小小？在上面大掃蕩 1807 01:24:44,640 --> 01:24:45,880 那就是殺人，你知不知道？ 1808 01:24:46,120 --> 01:24:46,600 你不要亂來 1809 01:24:46,680 --> 01:24:48,440 不要動，再動我馬上給你閹了 1810 01:24:48,520 --> 01:24:49,160 老大 1811 01:24:49,240 --> 01:24:49,880 什麼事？ 1812 01:24:49,960 --> 01:24:51,560 在我死以前，我有一個要求 1813 01:24:51,640 --> 01:24:53,200 不知道你能不能答應我 1814 01:24:53,280 --> 01:24:54,920 什麼要求？媽的，你真煩 1815 01:24:55,400 --> 01:24:57,000 先把弟弟放回去再死 1816 01:24:58,280 --> 01:24:59,280 怎麼樣？還可以吧 1817 01:25:02,520 --> 01:25:03,320 我們出去吧 1818 01:25:14,000 --> 01:25:15,000 你怕了嗎？ 1819 01:25:16,800 --> 01:25:17,600 是不是呀？ 1820 01:25:18,840 --> 01:25:21,000 你不是已經被警察給抓去了嗎？ 1821 01:25:21,760 --> 01:25:24,280 聰明的話你就趕快離開這個地方 1822 01:25:24,600 --> 01:25:27,200 看在你跟天賜是朋友的份上 1823 01:25:27,280 --> 01:25:29,920 我可以給你一筆跑路費 1824 01:25:30,480 --> 01:25:32,640 我既然來了，不會這麼容易就走的 1825 01:25:33,200 --> 01:25:34,280 你想怎麼樣？ 1826 01:25:35,000 --> 01:25:36,080 你搶我的男朋友 1827 01:25:36,160 --> 01:25:38,240 想盡辦法陷害我，還告我搶劫 1828 01:25:38,600 --> 01:25:39,920 你說我想怎麼樣 1829 01:25:40,080 --> 01:25:41,640 我只要一叫，你就跑不掉了 1830 01:25:42,920 --> 01:25:45,840 我根本就沒想過要走，我要殺了你 1831 01:25:45,920 --> 01:25:49,000 對不起，都是我不好，對不起 1832 01:25:49,080 --> 01:25:51,280 只要你把刀給放下來 1833 01:25:51,360 --> 01:25:52,600 你要我怎樣都可以 1834 01:25:53,240 --> 01:25:55,240 你有什麼不好，什麼不對？ 1835 01:25:55,320 --> 01:25:56,520 說來給我聽聽 1836 01:25:58,920 --> 01:26:01,160 是我叫Robert把首飾 1837 01:26:01,240 --> 01:26:03,440 放在你大哥的口袋裡 1838 01:26:03,520 --> 01:26:05,320 是我打破我自己的頭 1839 01:26:05,400 --> 01:26:08,800 是我騙了天賜說我跟他發生了關係 1840 01:26:09,560 --> 01:26:11,040 其實我跟他什麼都沒有 1841 01:26:12,080 --> 01:26:15,600 還有一次我打了他媽 1842 01:26:15,680 --> 01:26:18,200 然後說是他媽打我 1843 01:26:18,880 --> 01:26:20,920 我要你把這些話在天賜的面前 1844 01:26:21,000 --> 01:26:21,800 再說一遍 1845 01:26:22,480 --> 01:26:23,280 進去 1846 01:26:23,560 --> 01:26:24,400 小小 1847 01:26:25,280 --> 01:26:26,200 天賜 1848 01:26:26,280 --> 01:26:27,000 你說呀 1849 01:26:27,520 --> 01:26:28,960 我… 1850 01:26:29,200 --> 01:26:30,040 說什麼？ 1851 01:26:30,120 --> 01:26:32,280 天賜，她威脅我 1852 01:26:32,360 --> 01:26:33,920 不准我跟你結婚 1853 01:26:34,000 --> 01:26:34,720 你說什麼？ 1854 01:26:35,680 --> 01:26:37,360 你這個不要臉的臭婊子 1855 01:26:37,440 --> 01:26:40,200 你不但搶劫還想要殺人，是不是？ 1856 01:26:41,440 --> 01:26:42,280 是不是？ 1857 01:26:42,840 --> 01:26:44,480 小小，她承認了沒有？ 1858 01:26:48,160 --> 01:26:49,600 原來你們串通好了 1859 01:26:51,200 --> 01:26:51,920 你有本事的話 1860 01:26:52,000 --> 01:26:53,920 你就叫天賜不要跟我結婚 1861 01:26:54,600 --> 01:26:55,440 我才不怕你呢 1862 01:26:56,960 --> 01:26:58,280 你們在搞什麼鬼？ 1863 01:26:59,120 --> 01:27:01,520 其實他們上午已經開過庭了 1864 01:27:01,600 --> 01:27:02,640 可以保釋外出 1865 01:27:05,240 --> 01:27:06,040 天賜 1866 01:27:06,760 --> 01:27:08,600 無論他們用什麼方法來威脅我 1867 01:27:08,680 --> 01:27:09,440 我都不怕 1868 01:27:12,040 --> 01:27:13,480 我一定要嫁給你 1869 01:27:13,560 --> 01:27:16,360 兒子，你千萬別相信這狐狸精的話 1870 01:27:23,160 --> 01:27:26,560 慕人，雖然我媽跟他們都… 1871 01:27:26,640 --> 01:27:27,680 都不贊成我跟你結婚 1872 01:27:27,760 --> 01:27:29,480 但這都不是問題 1873 01:27:30,040 --> 01:27:31,160 天賜 1874 01:27:33,720 --> 01:27:37,240 我已經想清楚了，我不要跟你結婚 1875 01:27:38,880 --> 01:27:40,200 我愛的是小小 1876 01:27:44,600 --> 01:27:46,960 不管我是不是…跟你發生關係 1877 01:27:47,040 --> 01:27:48,960 她有沒有搶劫，我都不在乎 1878 01:27:50,000 --> 01:27:50,960 我要跟小小結婚 1879 01:27:51,320 --> 01:27:54,240 棒呀，你長這麼大就這次最棒了 1880 01:27:54,560 --> 01:27:57,960 好，現在還有三分鐘就十二點了 1881 01:27:58,040 --> 01:28:00,440 如果你不要我，這間教堂 1882 01:28:00,520 --> 01:28:02,560 也不會幫你跟另外一個女人證婚的 1883 01:28:04,520 --> 01:28:06,360 這怎麼辦呢？那遺產不就沒了嗎？ 1884 01:28:06,640 --> 01:28:08,480 媽，沒有那三億 1885 01:28:08,560 --> 01:28:10,240 一樣過得很開心，是不是？ 1886 01:28:10,320 --> 01:28:11,520 沒錯呀 1887 01:28:11,600 --> 01:28:13,120 但是便宜羅拔，我就不開心 1888 01:28:13,960 --> 01:28:15,240 不會的 1889 01:28:22,120 --> 01:28:26,800 媳婦，天賜，我就是你爺爺林新發 1890 01:28:27,560 --> 01:28:29,480 你不是病得很嚴重嗎？怎麼回事？ 1891 01:28:29,560 --> 01:28:33,640 我吃了中藥和針灸之後就沒事了 1892 01:28:33,920 --> 01:28:34,960 那錢不是泡湯了 1893 01:28:35,640 --> 01:28:38,040 現在我身體好得很 1894 01:28:38,840 --> 01:28:42,240 好呀，一拍兩散，大家都得不到 1895 01:28:43,000 --> 01:28:44,640 你這個不要臉的狐狸精 1896 01:28:44,720 --> 01:28:45,880 你再囉唆，我就捶死你 1897 01:28:48,800 --> 01:28:52,120 天賜，你到底喜歡哪一個？ 1898 01:28:53,240 --> 01:28:54,520 我喜歡的是她 1899 01:28:57,440 --> 01:28:58,480 挺不錯的 1900 01:28:59,840 --> 01:29:04,520 放心，爺爺雖然沒有給你三億美金 1901 01:29:04,600 --> 01:29:08,440 可是我會全力的支持你做生意的 1902 01:29:08,760 --> 01:29:09,560 謝謝爺爺 1903 01:29:10,320 --> 01:29:12,880 男人就要自己創業 1904 01:29:15,200 --> 01:29:17,040 你也別不服氣 1905 01:29:17,640 --> 01:29:20,880 我有幾句話要跟你說，你們都出去 1906 01:29:20,960 --> 01:29:21,680 爸爸 1907 01:29:21,760 --> 01:29:23,120 出去 1908 01:29:25,800 --> 01:29:27,080 老頭子打不過她的 1909 01:29:28,160 --> 01:29:29,120 要是待會不能解決 1910 01:29:29,200 --> 01:29:30,280 那個狐狸精的問題 1911 01:29:30,360 --> 01:29:31,960 我就一刀劈了她 1912 01:29:32,520 --> 01:29:33,320 你真有種 1913 01:29:39,400 --> 01:29:40,720 狐狸精，你想怎麼樣？ 1914 01:29:41,320 --> 01:29:44,520 別怕，她冤枉你們搶劫 1915 01:29:44,600 --> 01:29:47,880 是跟你們開玩笑的，沒事了 1916 01:29:48,800 --> 01:29:49,880 原來你會施蠱呀 1917 01:29:50,440 --> 01:29:53,720 不是，我是泡妞老手了 1918 01:29:55,520 --> 01:29:57,680 我跟慕人下個月 1919 01:29:57,760 --> 01:30:00,760 要去夏威夷度蜜月了 1920 01:30:03,280 --> 01:30:03,760 什麼？ 1921 01:30:03,840 --> 01:30:04,640 你說什麼？ 1922 01:30:05,680 --> 01:30:07,920 只要有錢，我是老少咸宜 1923 01:30:10,560 --> 01:30:12,320 媽咪 1924 01:30:12,840 --> 01:30:14,320 你不是叫我狐狸精的嗎？ 1925 01:30:15,000 --> 01:30:16,840 逗著你玩的嘛 1926 01:30:22,160 --> 01:30:24,600 小小，我沒有獲得遺產 1927 01:30:24,680 --> 01:30:25,560 你還會不會嫁給我？ 1928 01:30:36,880 --> 01:30:38,880 新娘子整容了？怎麼變了一個樣子 1929 01:30:38,960 --> 01:30:40,720 不是，神父，是我改變主意 1930 01:30:41,560 --> 01:30:43,200 年輕人那就看著辦好了 1931 01:30:43,280 --> 01:30:44,640 好了，那我們就開始了 1932 01:30:44,720 --> 01:30:47,880 今天非常歡迎大家來參加這個婚禮 1933 01:30:47,960 --> 01:30:49,720 三十秒沒搞定我把你閹了 1934 01:30:50,680 --> 01:30:52,800 好，你願不願意嫁給他？ 1935 01:30:52,880 --> 01:30:53,680 我願意 1936 01:30:53,760 --> 01:30:55,200 你願不願意娶她？ 1937 01:30:55,800 --> 01:30:56,280 他也願意 1938 01:30:56,360 --> 01:30:57,160 我願意 1939 01:30:57,240 --> 01:30:58,400 那你還不快點親他 1940 01:30:59,040 --> 01:31:00,000 親我 1941 01:31:00,480 --> 01:31:01,400 禮成 119037

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