Original subtitles

[OPENING THEME PLAYING]

♪ T-E-E-N

♪ T-I-T-A-N-S

♪ Teen Titans, let's go

♪ Teen Titans, go

[ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Who would've thought a movie about babies fighting dogs

would be so amazing?

I feel the enriched.

I feel inspired.

I feel like we should make our own movie.

[ALL GASP]

Can we's even do that?

Surely it is not legal for any fool to dabble

in such sacred arts.

Anyone can make a movie.

All you need is a script, a camera,

some actors, and a dream in your heart.

Uh, what about talent?

We've got none of that.

Has a lack of talent stopped anyone from pursuing

a job in entertainment?

Nopes, it ain't stopped anyone ever.

Then let's make a movie!

[ALL CHEERING]

[ALL EXCLAIMING EXCITEDLY]

Guys, wait.

Should we concerned about creative differences?

Uh, what's a "Creative differences"?

Creative people are oversensitive babies.

So when they have conflicting ideas

they get really mad at each other.

That's a good thing, challenging each other's ideas will only make

the movie better.

If we fight too much, we may never want to work together again.

It's a risk I'm willing to take.

Now, to get this movie started, the first thing we need to do is...

Decide which super famous celebrities are going to be playing us?

Ooh, ooh, you know who should play my man, Cyborg?

Seth Rogen.

Seth Rogen can't play me, dude.

Tom Selleck could play me though.

Ooh, Helen Mirren should play me.

I dig that sassy broad.

And I wish to be played by The Little Mermaid princess.

[SEAGULLS CHIRPING]

Okay, crazy. Who should play Robin?

Nobody is going to be playing me

because we are not making a movie about ourselves.

Oh, I see,

because no celebrity would wanna play you.

Not true, Joseph Gordon-Levitt would be happy to play me.

♪ I'm going in And I'm feelin' fresh

♪ I got a dope chain And a dope vest ♪

Ain't no way JGL could play a dude this weird-looking.

[GOAT BRAYING]

We must find the real person.

You mean, real ugly.

Yes, that is exactly what I meant.

[CHANTING IN OTHER LANGUAGE]

[BURPS]

These guys do not match my description.

Actually they kind of do.

Yo, if this dude was a little shorter

he'd be your height.

Hey, this one's got the right sized hands.

[SNIFFING]

This one's fishy odor makes me the sick.

[RETCHES] Just like yours.

[VOMITS]

These guys are perfect.

No, they're not, I'm handsome and almost tall.

Everyone, out! Out!

[EXCLAIMS]

[SCREAMS]

We're not making a movie about the Teen Titans.

We're going to make something original.

A piece of art that reflects the ennui of our times.

Art? I thought we were making a movie.

Movies are the highest art form.

Now, because I'm a controlling megalomaniac

I'll be the director.

We'll need someone to write the script.

Beast Boy and I can do that.

Are you sure? Being a writer isn't easy.

Sure it is, writers just hang out at coffee shops

-pretending to look busy. -But they's really just getting that free Wi-Fi, yo.

Full bars, baby.

Sounds like you know what you're doing.

We're also going to need someone to design the wardrobe.

I will gladly perform this task.

Great, I'm sure there'll be no misunderstandings at all.

Finally, someone has to be our makeup artist.

-What? -Oh, Raven.

Please be the one who will make all of the ups.

Are you kidding?

I've never worn makeup in my life.

Besides, I'm still worried that creative differences will ruin

our friendship.

What if we promised to be kind and courteous at all times?

Okay.

I'll do it.

-[ALL WHOOPING] -Titans! Go!

Make a movie!

[WHIRRING]

[LOUDLY] How's the script coming, boys?

We are crafting the classic hero's journey.

But we wanna subvert some of the more familiar tropes.

BOTH: That's write!

But they are tropes for a reason.

It's only meaningful when the hero experiences darkness.

Before the light.

The arrow flies.

The arrow falls.

BOTH: Write on!

What does archery have to do with anything?

It's a writer term, dum-dum.

When you's writing a movie,

the most important thing to say is things that make you sound like a writer.

Check it.

We've got a solid act one with a delicious inciting event.

But we've got some problems in act two.

We's struggling with the fun and games into the all is lost,

plus the dark night of the soul ain't playing.

Is anybody sipping from the poisoned chalice?

Oh, they're sipping.

[EVIL LAUGHTER]

But no one's scratching at the log.

Speaking of scratching, we's got to get the cat up the tree,

but he won't comes down.

-[CAT MEOWING] -We have to save the cat!

Save the cat!

-[WHIMPERS] -[THUDS]

BOTH: Write-O!

You mentioned act two problems?

We's just gonna hang a lantern on it.

Wow! You guys really sound like writers.

This script is gonna be great.

[WHIRRING]

[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]

Hey, Star, how's the wardrobe coming?

I have been toiling for the hours.

Behold!

[STARFIRE SPEAKING]

I said wardrobe, not war drone,

as in costumes.

Detecting aggression.

[EXCLAIMING]

Costumes! Make costumes!

Costumes, I suppose that makes more of the sense.

[EXCLAIMS]

Got a handle on the makeup yet, Raven?

Mmm-hmm, I've been trying some different techniques

to make the eyes pop.

Never looked better, keep up the good work.

All right, Titans.

I think we got everything we need to make this movie!

Now, let's take a look at the script.

[MYSTICAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]

This is terrible!

Your main character has no redeeming qualities!

You's a redeeming quality, fool.

Guys, please, be nice.

Creative differences,

remember?

[BOTH SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Yes, of course.

Mmm-mmm, this script has, uh...

Many admirable qualities, it's filled with words, I can read.

Some of them.

[BELL DINGING]

What do you think of the costumes?

Oh, wow, look at that.

Very nice, very, very,

nice.

-[COUGHS] -Raven,

let's get some makeup going.

The makeup has made us look like the monsters.

Which is good.

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY] Wonderful, really great,

-really good stuff everyone. -Indeed,

it is the highest of quality.

[STRAINING] Yes, it's so good, I can hardly contain myself.

[GRUNTING]

I can't speak polite anymore!

This costume is garbage.

You needs to do it better.

I have done my very best!

Your script is bad.

Bad, bad, bad.

You think that's bad? This is bad!

The creative differences!

-Come here! -[ALL ARGUING INDISTINCTLY]

STARFIRE: [GASPS] We no longer look like the monsters.

This isn't hideous anymore.

The script, it's fixed!

How is this happening?

It's the creative differences.

They're making everything better.

Well, I'll be.

What do you say, Titans, you ready to make the best movie ever?

[ALL CHEERING]

-Yay. -This is going to be fun, yo.

You know, guys, I thought creative differences would tear us apart.

But in the end, they made us even stronger.

Well said, Raven.

Now, who's ready to watch this little gem we've created?

Oh, yeah, let's do it, baby.

[FILM ROLLING]

I gotta leave my safe and comfortable space

and have an adventure, yo.

Who are you?

I'm your new buddy, we won't like each other at first.

But then we'll be best friends.

Okay.

We are the bad guys.

And we wanna tell you our evil plan.

Yes, we want to take over the world.

[BOTH LAUGHING EVILLY]

We must be the only ones who can stop them.

Action finale!

[GRUNTS]

[WHOOPS]

-Yay! -[BOTH CHEERING]

[SOBS] No, you can't be dead.

Okay.

[LAUGHS] Wow, our creative differences

helped us to make something truly special.

Uh, hello, did we all just watch the same thing?

It was all so familiar.

Yes, like the old sweater that brings the comfort.

No, I mean familiar in a bad way.

We struggled and fought and the best we could come up with

is something completely unoriginal.

I know, it's a complete copy of things we've seen before.

We've made a real Hollywood movie.

Hey, who wants to make the sequel?

ALL: Sequel!