Original subtitles

wondering his career averages against

the Sacramento Kings averages 27.5

points per game

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four dollars

yeah

I'm on my way right now

it's 3 10.

well I'm looking at a thousand dollars

of Italian engineering says everyone's

early

Johnson kiss my ass he had his chance

with the weather account his door closed

and my door opened well John's actually

here Pete so why don't you do this is my

moment Craig my future you understand me

if you let him in that room I swear to

God I will make sure

what if the Weller reps want to get

started stall Craig lie to them I'm

stuck in traffic

any towels man paper towels

house not you

what

what did I just say

anybody

screws this pitch up before I get in

there anybody

I will kill them do you understand me I

will literally shoot them in the house

all right

don't tell me to calm down

can I help you with something Mr Clean

not you [ __ ]

you are a bad person

and you're a janitor

one day you might just get a good look

at yourself

one day

he might not like what you see

whatever helps you work at night

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foreign

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[Applause]

it's occupied

hey I'm gonna be here a minute [ __ ]

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hey

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hey what is happening out there

all right you want me to come out there

hey

what is going on out here

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foreign

hey

hey [ __ ] open up

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talk to time

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okay I'm gonna be here a minute [ __ ]

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hey

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ah what is happening out there

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what the hell is happening out there

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what was happening out there

hey what the hell is happening out there

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thank you

all right you want me to come out there

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look up

hey I know this is weird but you're

trapped in it

time paradox

yeah it's time travel yeah I don't know

it's just happening forward backward

minutes or seconds totally random time

travel

one door opens another closes fix the

paradox

kill your future

what you were right

you were right

about the Stalls you just go in come out

that's how it works

oh

I just told

me that

this isn't real that's what I said

you're not real that's what I said

go into the song you'll see

I'm not going anywhere that's what I say

that's what I

I know you're freaked out

believe me

a couple minutes ago when I was you I

didn't believe me either

but if you go into that stall you come

back out you're going to be right where

I'm standing now

and you'll see what I'm talking about

I'll see

you will be me

no

no

what no no what

this is different

I didn't say that this is all different

okay time travel

so there's like a timeline

dead guy's watch is broken here at 3 30.

that's

10 minutes from now by my watch

it's 12 by mine okay so you are two

minutes from where I am and then there's

something about folding a piece of paper

and pushing them

pencil through it

we're doing 80s time travel I'm here

you're here we die here somehow we're

gonna make it out of here live we've got

to keep here from happening right

so we go here instead create a new

timeline

that's how Dr Marty did it

okay

easy

you're me from the future right yeah so

I just do something you did Future's

changed new timeline

no that's the problem

I went into the stall again and you

didn't you should already be me but

you're nuts that's the Paradox now we

both just exist

right

okay so the note said kill the future

close the door close so so

you're from the future

yeah

oh come on look I'm not saying it's

pretty but if you

and I

can do this and why would I do that

looks like you already have I don't even

have a gun sure you do where did that

thing even come from it came from you I

don't have it then take it from who

yourself why do I have because you took

it look it's time travel don't overthink

it

I got a meeting yet too what the meeting

whoa let's overthink this I want to

overthink this

look man you can't change the future

you're from the future

two minutes and that means that I'm in

the past so I should be the one to

change the future no because what if I'm

in the future from the past

if you're in the future how can you

change it it's got to be me in the past

changing the future

no no no okay fine you're right but look

Marty McFly McFly's dad you kissed your

mom now I go into the stall that's me

punching Biff you shoot yourself that

bullet's your DeLorean

you mean lightning strike yeah whatever

as long as it kills you

hey look at me the writing's on the

toilet paper okay

your door closes and my door opens kill

your future that's what it says

and that's you

I'll thank myself later

nice

it's very

that's very Charming

kill your future that's what it says and

that's you

I'll thank myself later

when it gets in the way

I'm going to take one for the team Pete

you look like a good guy to me

your door closes

my door

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come on

who are you

I'm me who are you

but I just

so we're right back where we started

what are you doing

I'm gonna try again well what do you

mean try again

well you came out before I did so your

future me

yeah so there's the gun kill the future

I just went through this with the other

no I just went through this with the

other guy okay so then you know whoa

hold up

that's not fair

yeah that's what the other guy said

foreign

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at first I didn't off himself that's

what happened I knew I couldn't trust

myself wait what's not working now we

just keep spawning morons

what did you just say he called you a

[ __ ] guys let's just chill

he's you idiot you're calling me who's

the idiot then Lauren it's working

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that's the problem

we just keep creating more paradoxes

every step is a step in the wrong

direction

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hey this is it

what last requests

what

I finally get it

you don't fix a paradox gentleman

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you finish it

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time to close some doors

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[Applause]

let me out

let me out

get in that stall

what are you doing

right now what why are you doing this

why

because there's one body unaccounted for

and that's you in that stall at 3 30.

get in the store get in put your jacket

back on

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I can still make the end of it to the

meeting

you're crazy yeah you and me both okay

don't do this shut up

I've I've got just as much dude

who do you think you're talking to

I know all your little tactics oh you're

[ __ ] at the end of the day you're

just a manipulative [ __ ] aren't you

you want me to feel bad about this

for a fact that you do the same

your door closes and my door opens

I'll thank myself later

you really are a bad person

any last requests

maybe just a little privacy

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thank you

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hey this is it

what last requests

no

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wait

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foreign

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foreign

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thank you

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