Original subtitles

The AP got the story. The UP got the story.

The INS got the story.

Everybody with a war correspondent in Moscow got the story

but the Amalgamated News of America, my organization!

In my 30 years in the newspaper business...

You've got to get a hold of yourself, Chief. You're not a well man.

Thanks to Kittredge.

War correspondent!

If I could only get a flash he'd been shot or something...

Easy, Chief.

- Well, at least it's a pleasant thought. - Cablegram, Mr. Mason.

"Disregard all rumors.

"Germany will positively not invade Russia. Kittredge."

There, do you see what I mean?

(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)

My greatest makeup job since I was with the Moscow Art Theatre.

Really, really?

Oh! Who's that?

You see? You don't even recognize yourself.

Nobody'd better recognize me. I've gotta get out of here.

I gave those newspapermen down the hall 8-to-5

that Germany wouldn't invade Russia, and I haven't enough money to pay you.

(COUGHING)

Say, is this beard fresh?

But of course. I cut it off the horse myself.

Oh, well, that...

Well, put a saddle on me and let's get going.

I hope those newshounds don't know who I am.

Don't worry, nobody in the whole world will recognize you.

- You sure? - Not even your own brother.

Not even your own mother!

Who's there?

It's the maid. Is it all right to make up your bed, Mr. Kittredge?

Oh, that would be silly, I'm wearing the mattress,

so come back later, huh?

Putschki? See, you!

- So, nobody'd recognize me, huh? - No wonder. I forgot your mustache.

Well, come on, shoot the 'stache to me, Sache!

Let's not skip up here.

What did you do with the rest of the bicycle?

Look, when I get down in the street,

you lower the bags to me on the rope, will you?

If I get past those wolves, I'll double your salary.

- Thank you very much. Spasiba. - Oh, yeah. Da, da.

Should have killed this thing before I put it on.

MAN: Kittredge is going to pay me or I'll knock his ears off.

I'm getting mine, too.

I saw him trying to get down the fire escape this morning.

- Where are you going? - Who, me?

I'm just going in there to see a friend of mine who is out.

If you are wanting to see Mr. Kittredge, he is not for many hours waking up yet.

- I'm going in there and get my money. - You will please to take a powder.

(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)

(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)

- Foreigner? - Hey, who are you, anyway?

Me? I am the great Russian singer and dancer...

Yeah? Say that again.

- I think you're... - No more talk. Better I sing and dance.

Are you going anywhere special?

No, I'm just keeping the seat warm for Mrs. Roosevelt.

(LAUGHING)

My name is Matthews. I'm from the New York Gazette.

Oh, really?

You know, I was the one who sent that story back on the invasion of Russia.

Sent over 1,000 words.

You know, if it wasn't for me, they wouldn't have known anything.

- Oh, is that so? - Yes.

- What's the matter with you? - Oh, nothing.

You big blabbermouth!

I'm a newspaperman myself, but I was double-crossed.

You can't trust that Hitler. He'd double-cross his best friend.

You're telling me!

Hiya, boys! Well, here I am, back from the wars.

Well, if isn't Joseph John McGinty McGuirk himself!

This is like old times.

Hiya, Pop!

How about a little warm welcome for old Bob Kittredge?

Walt, you old rascal! You're a sight for sore eyes.

It's gonna be good to hear your voice again.

Hiya, Jackson. How's my little mascot?

From now on, you can catch your own mice.

(MOURNFUL MUSIC PLAYING ON HARMONICA)

And how are you, my little man?

How are you?

Well, I didn't waste a second getting here, Chief.

Well, well, well. Kittredge, my boy.

- You know, I've dreamed of this moment. - Well, I have, too.

You know, it got so I was afraid to go to sleep.

That's right. Make yourself at home.

You'll think I'm wacky,

but I thought you were going to bawl me out when I got here.

(LAUGHS)

Now, would I bring you 5,000 miles just to bawl you out?

Now, would I?

Oh, that'd be silly.

Of course it would. I just wanted you near me.

- Right in this room. - Oh, well...

So I could beat you to death with my bare hands,

- you flannel-headed traitor! - No! No!

- No, no, Chief! You must control yourself. - That's right, Chief.

- Think of your blood pressure. - My blood...

- Think of my mother, Chief. - What mother?

All right, Kittredge.

I'll give you a better break than you deserve.

Oh, that's swell.

You mean you're gonna send me to the front again?

Yes, I'm going to send you to the front.

To the front of the employment agencies on Sixth Avenue.

You're lucky I'm only firing you.

Now, get out of here before I skin you alive!

Fired? Why, you don't mean that.

You try to get in the building tomorrow morning and find out.

Oh, now, listen, Chief.

Just because I slipped up a little on the Russian rumpus...

Now, listen to me, you mutton-topped incompetent.

For years I've been trying to make a newspaperman out of you.

I started you at Police Headquarters,

and the first day you passed up the Rothstein murder.

Well, I explained that to you, Chief.

How did I know those little round things in his head were bullet holes?

Then you wanted to be a foreign correspondent.

And what happened?

Two years ago, you were standing right outside the beer hall in Munich

when a bomb exploded that nearly killed Hitler.

You didn't even hear it.

Well, I did hear it, but I didn't know it was a bomb.

Those Nazis had just finished a keg of beer and I thought they were...

Never mind.

You've wrecked my nervous system, ruined my reputation.

You've cost me money, customers and goodwill.

Does that mean you're dissatisfied with my work, Chief?

I hate your work.

I hate you.

Why, I wouldn't even trust you to cover a hole in the carpet,

let alone another story.

Well, you didn't talk this way to me when I won a Pulitzer Prize.

That's right. You did win a Pulitzer.

You really did.

And I'll go to my grave, which you dug for me,

wondering who won it for you.

I won it myself, and I'll win another.

When I do, you'll have to give me another chance.

Send me to the front again.

I'll not only do that, I'll double your salary.

It's a deal, Chief, and here's my hand on it.

- (EX CLAIMING) You big blubber-head. - I'm sorry.

Look what you've done!

I'm sorry. I didn't know you use the wet kind. I'm sorry.

Smith, get this big stumblebum out of here before I kill him.

- I'll fix this. - Stop that!

- Get out! - Please, Mr. Kittredge.

You'd better go now.

Don't worry, Chief. I'll keep in touch with you.

Put armed guards around the building,

and if Kittredge shows up, their orders are, "Shoot to kill."

I just got a raise. I...

And by that time, I had him eating out of the hollow of my hand.

"Mason," I said, "I accept your apology on two conditions:

"a raise in salary and a vacation,

"so I can visit my girl in Washington before I go back to the front."

So he thinks you're an ace.

He told me I was the greatest foreign correspondent in the world.

These cigarettes are stronger than I thought.

(THUDDING)

Did you hear something out there?

Could be my watch. It needs oiling.

I come 5,000 miles and you leap into the arms of another man.

- Vanescu! - Quiet! Turn off your light!

- Yeah, but... - Turn off your light!

Everybody's an Air Raid Warden these days.

Say, what are you...

(SHUSHING)

What's the matter, Vanescu? She won't scream.

Take your hand away.

What do you mean by sneaking in here and half strangling me?

Please, I am in great danger. Quiet.

Kittredge, I must see you at once, alone.

Go into the office.

It's all right, Chris. Vanescu's an old friend of mine.

I can trust him just like I trust myself.

Say, I'd better watch that guy!

Well, well, I haven't seen you

since somebody tried to kill you that night in Istanbul.

Do you know why those men were trying to kill me tonight?

- You took three lumps of sugar? - No. Sit down.

They were trying to kill me because they wish to stop me

from giving you the biggest story of your career.

Yeah?

How would you like me to win another Pulitzer Prize for you?

(SHUSHING)

What's the story, Vanescu? Tell it to me.

- I will gladly tell it to you for $10,000. - It's a deal.

- Ten thousand what? - Dollars.

And, my friend, it is a bargain. This scoop will make you.

Yes, a pauper.

- I'll give you $1,000. - To save time, $9,000.

- To save money, $2,000. - $7,500.

- $3,000. - $6,000.

- $4,000. - All right, $4,000.

$5,000 and not a penny more. Is it a deal?

It's a deal.

(LAUGHING)

Chris, I've got to give Vanescu $5,000 right away.

For what? For trying to strangle me?

- Do you know who Vanescu is? - All I know...

He's the sharpest political tipster in the business.

He tipped me off to Quisling in Norway, the Nazis in Holland,

the P�tain-Darlan deal...

Then why didn't you cable any of those stories?

I was working on bigger things.

But I've got to get an okay on that much money.

- Let me call Mason in New York. - Yeah, go...

Call Mason? No, no.

You're too young to hear that kind of language.

Now, look, you just got out of one jam with Mason,

and if you get into another, he'll surely fire you.

Well, I'll just have to risk it.

Oh, Chris, I'm not doing this for myself. It's for us.

All those long, weary months in Moscow,

I kept dreaming of you in that little rose-covered cottage,

with the green shutters and the window boxes

- and the white... - And the white picket fence.

You're a little off key.

Every time you want me to get you out of a jam,

I hear about the green shutters and the white picket fence.

Oh, but this time it's on the level.

If you'll only sign this, we'll be honeymooning in Miami in a week.

I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on earth.

If I was the last man on earth, you'd have to wait for a priority.

Besides, we're going to spend our honeymoon at Niagara Falls.

Oh, Chris, you know I'm allergic to high places.

Why, I get dizzy if I just get up on my toes.

I'd take one look over the Falls and faint, and on my honeymoon, too!

Please, hurry. Every moment counts.

All right, give me the check.

He wanted $10,000 at first.

Here's the check on the Day and Night Bank.

You can get the money as soon as you leave here.

All right, come inside and I will dictate the story.

Okay. Get your book, honey, and plenty of pencils.

When you see a light, aim carefully.

Get every word of this, Chris.

- Are you ready? - Yes.

Now, you've got everything all laid out in your mind?

- Right. - All right, shoot!

Say, that's quick service.

Hey, wait for baby.

- I must leave here at once. - That will be all right with me.

But I can't leave in these clothes, they will recognize me.

It is certain death.

No, sir! Not on your five-star final.

He's not going to leave here in my clothes.

Oh, Chris! Now, wait.

It's for me, baby. Kittredge, your old pal.

If he gets killed leaving here, I don't get my story.

Please.

- Oh, all right. - Oh, attagirl!

Mr. Kittredge! This is a privilege reserved for Niagara Falls.

Miami. In Miami you can sleep nights.

How far is it to Niagara Falls?

Just try these on for size.

If my clothes are too tight for him, you can give him your girdle.

Chris, are you decent?

Yes, and that's more than I can say for either of you two.

- He's all set now. - I'm delighted.

Look.

Boy, you look great!

- Is it all right? - I think it's charming.

I'll say. Did you ever try modeling?

Good luck!

Isn't this like old times, Chris?

The two of us working together. The danger, the thrills, the excitement.

(LAUGHING)

I'll say this for you, Kit. There's never a dull moment.

Is Vanescu coming back here,

or do we meet him somewhere for the story?

It better be some yarn for 5,000 bucks.

What's the matter, Kit? You...

You didn't arrange anything with him?

You don't know where he lives, or where to find him?

Oh, Kit, you dope!

So you wound Mason around your little finger, did you?

And he apologized and told you to go to Washington, did he?

Well, to tell the truth, he didn't say, "Go to Washington."

The place he mentioned was a little further south and much warmer.

Kit, do you realize what you've done?

What am I going to say to Mason when he finds out about the check?

Well, I'll take care of that, honey.

It's true, he did fire me, but only because he was worked up at the time.

- By now, he's probably defrosted. - Yes.

Nice defrosting!

This isn't Mason's handwriting. It doesn't mean a thing.

I'll tell you what it means. This is a wash-up, Kit.

I can't stand it any longer.

Well, what do you want?

Do you have a story you want to sell for $5,000?

No. I just brought up your order, that's all, from the drug store.

We didn't order anything, son. Run along.

Well, this is 1214, ain't it? Amalgamated News?

Well, this is your order. Where do you want it?

Just let me have the whole tray right in my kisser.

You'd better take it back, son. There must be some mistake.

No mistake, lady.

Ham on wheat and a milkshake for 1214. It's all paid for.

Well, if it's paid for, drop it anywhere there.

- Well, is that all? - Yeah, that's all. Go, go, Henry Aldrich.

We've got to raise the money to pay back the firm.

I've got $400 in the bank. That makes us $4,600 short.

Have you got any money, Kit?

I got $6, a couple of slugs and a Wilkie button.

Well, can you raise any?

Yeah, I can sell my body to a medical school.

- How can you eat at a time like this? - I'm nervous.

- What is it? - Oh, it's nothing. It's from Vanescu.

Vanescu!

Oh, good old Vanescu. I knew he'd come through. Look!

KIT: We haven't got a minute to lose, Chris.

Have you got this stuff? A red purse and a green umbrella?

Well, I've got a red purse at home,

and one of the girls, Sally, has a green umbrella.

Oh, that's swell.

Oh, but, Kit, that's a terrible color scheme.

With a red purse, I'd never carry a green umbrella.

Oh, Chris, this isn't a fashion show, it's Vanescu's idea,

and we gotta do as he says.

Hello. Who is this? Sally?

Oh, good. Listen. Listen carefully, Sally.

Chris is going out on a terribly important story

and she has to have a red purse and a green umbrella.

and she has to have a red purse and a green umbrella.

A red purse and a green umbrella?

Yes.

Yes, of course I'll get it.

What?

Oh, and Chris' notebook in the desk. The one with her name on it.

It sounds absolutely thrilling.

- Can I go along with Chris? - No, you can't.

Hop into a cab right away and meet us at the Lincoln Memorial.

That's right, the Lincoln Memorial.

She should have been here long ago. I don't understand it.

I don't either.

She probably stopped off at a USO dance.

Say, didn't you tell her to meet us at the Lincoln Memorial?

Yes, and here we are.

- Are we? - Why, of course. Anybody knows...

Yes, you fathead.

The Lincoln Memorial, not the Washington Monument.

Well, come on, let's get going. Don't stand there.

She's not around here either.

CHRIS: I guess she got tired of waiting.

- Say, Officer. - Yeah?

Pardon me, did you see a green girl around here carrying a red umbrella?

Huh?

How silly of me.

I mean, did you see a green pocketbook with a red girl carrying an umbrella?

A green pocketbook, a red... Oh, yeah.

She got into a car with some men over there just a few minutes ago.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Well, thanks.

Well, I guess we'd better go home and wait, huh?

Go home? Why? The evening is young yet.

There must still be lots of trouble you can get into.

Oh, come on, now, Chris. Stop riding me, will you?

After all, everyone makes mistakes. Is it my fault I'm good at it?

That's about all you're good for, you donkey.

It's bad enough that you get me wound up in your crazy schemes.

I deserve it for being sap enough to be in love with you.

But what about Sally? She doesn't even like you.

Oh, she will. I'm an acquired taste.

Nobody likes me at first.

I was 14 years old before my mother would let me in the house.

Now, look, honey...

I thought they would send the other young lady,

but you will do.

Guard the door and keep your eyes and ears open.

It was bad enough before I could see.

Are you fond of spiders?

Fonder than I am of the Gestapo.

Are you ready?

Are you ready?

I guess so. I wouldn't know for sure.

Saboteurs, employed by three enemy governments,

are at work here in Washington.

The headquarters and arsenal of this ring are disguised as a beauty salon

where bombs and explosives

are manufactured and stored in great quantities.

...for the activities of the ring

is transmitted direct to the principal agents,

and reports of the spies in code

are transmitted to Foreign Offices in the same way.

(GROANING)

My work is finished.

You will be taken back now, young lady.

That sure suits me fine, mister.

I guess I'll go now.

(BANGING)

(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)

Gestapo!

(SCREAMS)

(CRYING)

About this time of night,

I always wish you had an apartment with a little more privacy.

Privacy, in Washington?

Say, I'm lucky to have a place with only five other girls.

I'd like to have the cold cream concession in your apartment.

That's Lucille and her boyfriend. He's a captain.

He certainly handles himself well under fire.

- Good night, Jeff. - Good night, Lucille.

- How are maneuvers? - Okay.

Say, what's the penalty for impersonating an officer?

I don't know. Try it.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Chris, do you hear that far off ringing of bells?

This must be love.

You say it's love, I say it's your elbow.

- Hi, Helen. - Hello.

- Hi, Helen. - Hi.

How are things at the Treasury Department?

Making any money?

(WHISTLES)

This place isn't big enough for both of you. Either you or that joke has to go.

- Hello, Lucy. - Hi.

Don't bother with the bed, girls, this couch is fine for me.

Why don't you get off the couch and give us a hand?

- Don't be bitter. - Don't tell me he's moved in.

Oh, here, let me give you a hand with that, will you?

- Yeah. He irons beautifully, Mildred. - Yeah, this is my racket.

I figure these things out.

- There you are. - Thank you.

That's all right. You might be able to do me a favor.

The next time a big story breaks down at the FBI,

you could tip me off.

Sure. When they issue a warrant for you, I'll let you know.

Yeah. Well, that'll be...

Where is Sally, Chris? Didn't she go out to meet you?

Oh, there's been a little slip-up. Sally's all right.

I'm not so sure, Kit. I'm afraid something's happened to her.

She's been gone a terribly long time.

Oh, nonsense. Four hours. You call that a long time?

Why, I went out on a story once and I was gone for two years.

And I never even got the story.

So you chicks stop worrying. She'll be all right.

- She'd better be. - Here comes her boyfriend.

Wait till he finds out Sally's missing and you're responsible.

He's a Marine, the biggest and the strongest in the whole Corps.

He's won three medals for sharpshooting.

He shoots backwards without a mirror.

And he used to be a professional wrestler.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

There he is.

- Hiya, Helen. - Hello, Red. Come in.

- Hello, girls. How are you? - Hello, Red.

Where's Sally?

Well, what's happened? Where is she?

- I'll turn down the bed later, girls. - Hey!

- Who are you? - Oh, I'm the new maid here.

- I was just doing a little dusting. I'll be... - Wait a minute.

There's something funny going on around here.

- Where's Sally? - Ask him.

- Well? - Oh, Sally's all right, Red.

She's right in there. I'll give her a holler.

Oh, Sally!

Sally. Sally. Come on out, your boyfriend's here.

(IN WOMAN'S VOICE) I'm coming.

You see? She's coming.

Don't try any of your tricks, buddy. Come on. What's happened to Sally?

Well, it's not my fault, Red.

Some rat, a no-good reporter named Kittredge,

sent her out on a story and she isn't back yet.

That Kittredge is responsible.

Yeah? Who are you?

Kittredge. Oh, no, no. I'm an imposter. I mean...

Now, look, Red, don't fire till you see the whites of my eyes.

Sally's all right.

She'll be back soon, just as pretty and fresh and sweet as when she left here.

You'll see.

(DOOR OPENING)

You see? Just as fresh as a daisy.

- Gracious! What is it honey? - CHRIS: Sally!

- What happened to you, Sally? - Are you hurt?

They shot at me.

I fell and they chased me.

Come on, honey.

Dogs, dark. Oh, it was awful.

- Quick, Mildred, get some water. - Sally, honey, what's happened?

- Did you get the dictation? - Back away.

Take it easy, Sally. Tell us what happened.

You can remember. Talk slowly, honey.

Here, sit down.

- Sally, did you get the dictation? - Oh, wait a minute.

They chased me and I was so scared.

It was dark and the dogs were growling.

Two men were running after me.

- Did you get the dictation, Sally? - Come on.

Yes, I got the dictation.

The man talked so fast, but I got it.

- I got it all. - Oh, that's fine, Sally.

Okay, everybody, leave her alone now.

This kid's got to get to bed. She's hysterical.

Here, give her a couple of these sleeping pills

so she can get a good rest.

- That's a good idea, Kit. - Take it easy, Sally.

- Come on, baby. - It was awful!

And I had to run so fast.

And they were shooting and it was so dark.

Oh, never mind. You've done a great job, honey.

Everything's okay. It turned out swell.

Then they grabbed me.

They stole the notebook.

They got away with all the dictation.

Oh, no! No! Don't give her any sleeping tablets.

- No! Chris! - Hey, wait a minute. You can't go in there.

No?

FAUSCHEIM: Splendid!

You have done very well.

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

Dismissed!

Well, gentlemen,

I told you my men would bring in the notebook,

and here it is.

There is no substitute for German efficiency.

Send in Gross.

What delayed you?

Read this.

(CLEARING THROAT)

I am waiting, Gross.

I cannot read it. It is not Pitman.

I said read it.

I am an expert on Pitman. This is not Pitman, Your Highness.

It is too late for flattery.

Get out!

Fauscheim, your methods are too crude.

What is needed here is a fine Italian hand.

Permit me.

Send in Signor Testori, please.

We do things differently.

Testori! How are you? How's the family?

You're looking very well indeed. Come in.

Here is the shorthand notebook I was telling you about.

Just read it to us, won't you?

- Most assuredly, Signor Baldanacco. - Thank you.

I cannot. It is not Gregg.

The fine Italian hand!

I regret, it is not my system.

I am an expert on Gregg shorthand.

This must be speedwriting.

(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

Scram, you dope!

If we have wasted enough time now on your experts,

perhaps you will allow me to bring in a humble servant of the Emperor

who understands all shorthand systems.

Send in Mr. Hawara, please.

Translation, please.

- This shorthand is not Pitman. - Splendid! Continue, please.

- This shorthand is also not Gregg. - Excellent! Go on.

Shorthand is also not speedwriting.

It is not Pitman, it is not Gregg, it is not speedwriting.

What is it?

Regret to say, it is no shorthand system.

Stenographer who write this make up own system.

This was entirely your scheme.

Quiet! Quiet!

Quiet!

I am thinking.

- HELEN: Hurry up, Lucille. Step on it. - Well, how's Sally?

- She's sleeping nicely. - Like a log.

- And how are you? - Hello.

Still sleeping? What did you use on her? Chloroform?

That girl's sleeping my life away. I've got to get that story.

I'm ruined if she doesn't wake up.

You girls go ahead. I'll stay here with him and Sally.

Can you manage all right without us, Chris?

Oh, sure. They're both unconscious.

I heard that last crack.

But I forgive you.

I know you're all worked up and excited.

Girls can't stand up under a strain like a man.

You're doing fine.

You're about as steady as a riveting machine right now.

Well, who wouldn't be upset?

I get a great story, the biggest thing in my career,

and I have it shot right out from under me.

Do you realize I may never see Vanescu again?

And the story's dynamite, it must be.

Because somebody else wanted it badly enough to steal the notebook.

- Who? - Who, she says!

If I knew who stole the notebook, I wouldn't be waiting

for that Southern fried chicken to spread her wings.

This way. The hall. It's better.

We gotta wake her up, Chris.

Every minute she's asleep is taking a year off my life.

- Ammonia! - Go ahead and faint. I won't stop you.

No, not for me, for Sally. It revives people, doesn't it?

- Maybe. Get some and try. - I can't lose.

If it doesn't revive Sally, I'll need it myself.

Say, come on, fellas, get this off the stairs. I'm in a hurry.

Sorry. It's heavy. We're having difficulty.

Well, I'll give you a hand with it.

Here, I've got it. Lift your end.

Well, lift a little, I'm only helping.

Say, this is heavy. What have you got in here, a body?

Come on, fellas, let's get going. I've got my own troubles.

We're in the stretch.

Well, I could use a little spritz of ammonia right now.

You know, in a job like mine, where you use your brain so much,

you neglect your muscles.

I guess you can handle it from here, huh, boys?

- Oh, yeah. Thanks for helping us. - Oh, it was nothing.

All I need is a new back.

Kit! Kit!

- Sally's gone! She's been kidnapped! - Kidnapped!

- They must have her in our hamper. - In the...

Hey! Hey!

Do something, quick! Get a car! Chase them!

Leave it to me, Chris. I got their license number.

- They can't get very far. - Oh, good, Kit.

Get that girl, Laura. The one who works at the license bureau.

- Have her trace it. - All right.

Boy, this is the break I've been waiting for.

- We'll round up every last one of them. - Yeah. Come on.

Yes, Laura. Have you got it? Great!

Did she get it? Come on, Chris, don't hold out on me.

Thanks, Laura.

The car is owned by the Capitol Drive It Yourself System.

- Oh, I've heard of that outfit. - It was rented some time last night.

Oh, swell! Now let's find out who got it.

- I know who got it. - Yeah?

A man about 5'11 ", a mastermind named Robert Kittredge.

How do you like that, you Quiz Kid?

They kidnapped Sally in your own car.

Oh, if I don't get that car back, I'll lose my deposit.

I'm gonna call the police and tell them they've got Sally.

Oh, now, just another second, please, Chris.

No. You've had hours.

Heaven knows where Sally is or what they're doing to her.

Oh, she's all right. They'll never harm her.

- They don't dare. - And why not?

Because you can get 20 years for hitting anyone with glasses,

and that's quite a showcase that gal totes.

- But she's not wearing them. - Yeah.

Huh?

They're in there. I saw them.

Kit, Sally's as blind as a bat without those glasses.

That's for the glasses, angel.

Both lenses.

They're bifocals.

Here they are.

It's all so simple, we should have guessed it right away.

Guessed what? What are you talking about?

Sally must have messed up her shorthand somehow

and they snatched her so she could read what Vanescu dictated.

But she can't read a billboard without those glasses.

That's it.

Don't you see, Chris? They've gotta come back to get these.

And they'll be after whoever's got them.

Well, I've got them.

Maybe you'd better hold them.

- Hey, wait a minute. What are you doing? - I'm going to call the FBI.

Oh, now, listen, sweetheart, if the G-men move in,

all the papers will get the story, and I'll lose a sensational scoop.

Do you mean to tell me that Sally's life isn't worth more than a scoop?

You're right, absolutely right.

I'm a heel, Chris. A worn-down, rubberless heel.

Don't have anything to do with me. Forget me. Give me up, Chris.

I'm just no good, that's all.

You're a darling, Kit.

It takes a mighty big man to admit he's done something small.

You're right.

Hello? Federal Bureau of Investigation?

I want to report a kidnapping.

I no kidnap nobody. Only wash laundry. FBI?

You want Japanese. Me Chinese, 100% American.

Hope you catch them.

Oh, that's fine.

Yes, put every available man on the case,

and I'll be right down to tell you what I know about it.

Yes. Yes, of course. Goodbye.

Boy, they sound tough.

Don't worry, Chris. They'll have Sally back in no time.

- Thanks, Kit. - Oh, it's nothing.

I'm sorry about the story.

Oh, well, it really doesn't matter,

even though it might have been the greatest yarn of my life.

It might have even made me famous, wealthy perhaps.

Oh, well, money isn't everything.

That's right. After all, you can't take it with you.

No, but it would have been fun toting it around for a while.

- What are you doing? - Turning everything over to the FBI.

The glasses, the note Vanescu sent us last night.

Now, where...

Oh, yes.

- That's funny. - What is it?

I never noticed the other side of this note. Look!

- Say, this is nice. - Strictly from Hungary.

Good evening. This table, please.

(EASTERN MUSIC PLA YING)

Maybe we have to do our own cooking.

Kittredge.

Wait on him and report to me.

- Good evening. - Hi.

- You would like perhaps dinner? - Do we look perhaps hungry?

- I'll have a bourbon and soda. - With two straws.

I'm killing him.

You order for both of us, Kit.

Say, there's a dish I've heard you have here.

I don't see it on the menu.

Mushrooms a la Vanescu.

- Mushrooms a la... - Vanescu.

It's a Romanian dish, about 6 feet, dark complexioned...

- I mean, it's mushrooms with... - I'll see if we have it, sir.

I'll bet a new tire he comes back with mushrooms.

Maybe so, but I have a feeling it registered.

(SPEAKING ROMANIAN)

She wants to play gin rummy. Some other time, Carmen.

- The cards tell everything. - Yes, we know.

Secrets of the heart.

- Business prospects. - Sure.

- Where missing friends are located. - Yes.

Oh, sure. I want my fortune told. Pull up a couple of chairs and sit down.

She carries her own tent.

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(CLICKING TONGUE)

Look, never mind the cricket solo. What's in the cards?

Yes, just get down to the interesting part.

- All right. This is the house. - House.

- Blood! - You're getting blood all over the house.

And this is you.

- I've gotten much thinner. - Yes, and you've got two heads.

I could use a spare.

I see you in the house with two beautiful girls.

I see them in shimmering dresses.

I see them begging you to love them.

I see you refusing.

I see you need glasses.

Look, let's skip right down to the part about missing friends. Do you mind?

This friend you are looking for, he is a Romanian, yes?

- Yes. Where is he? - He sent you here?

Well, yes, he did in a way.

I had a note from him and he mentioned this place.

Upstairs we have private rooms.

Find friends much easier.

However, you must be alone. Perhaps, you will come back another time.

Oh, no, no. I'm alone right now.

- Oh, no, you are with beautiful girl. - Oh, I'm not with her.

This is just a tomato I picked up under a table.

What? Well, you've got a nerve.

Go on. Grab some air, sister. You've had your drink.

Go on, burn the breeze, stir your stumps. Beat it, will you?

Okay, you third-rate palooka. So, you're going to do a fade, huh?

Take a walkout powder, are you? Go on, waltz, waltz, waltz.

- See if I care, you lug! - Shut up!

(BOTH EX CLAIMING)

She must work on the swing shift.

(PEOPLE LAUGHING)

Well, that's that.

Now, where to, Gypsy Rose?

Go to the end of the balcony, turn left, then go up the stairs.

- There you will find what you seek. - Oh, thanks.

(SPEAKING ROMANIAN)

I tell you, Margot, these bunglers are driving me crazy.

First we risk everything to get this notebook,

and then we cannot decipher it.

We have the girl who wrote it, and still cannot read her notes.

- Her glasses! - Be patient, Otto.

We have handled much greater problems.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

- FAUSCHEIM: Who is it? - Karl. It is important.

I am to report, Herr Fauscheim, that Kittredge is here asking about Vanescu.

They've sent him up here to madam.

Kittredge? How did he get here?

I don't know. We may have underestimated him.

Find out what he knows.

Clear away everything.

It's all right. Get out!

Leave Kittredge to me, Otto. I will handle him.

See to it.

Yes?

Yes.

Won't you come in?

Who? Me?

Well, you see, I was looking for someone, a friend of mine, a man, darn it.

Come in. I asked them to send you here, to me.

To you? Well...

In some ways, that's better than I expected.

- Will there be anything else? - No, thank you.

So, you are looking for a friend of yours.

I are? I mean, I am?

You were asking downstairs about a man, Gregory Vanescu.

Oh, Vanescu. Oh, yes, yes.

Well, if I run into Vanescu, I'll tell him you were looking for him.

No. It is you who are looking for Vanescu.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course.

- You know him well, this Vanescu? - Oh, sure. We're like that.

I'm the nervous one.

A light? Right here.

Oh, thank you.

- The door. - Huh?

Someone is there.

Oh, I was mistaken.

My nerves, these last few days, have been terrible.

- Won't you sit down, please? - Oh, sure.

What can I lose?

You see, many people are hunting for Vanescu.

- I must be careful. - Yes, we must.

- What is your name? - My name? Why, it's...

Oh, now, isn't that silly? It was right on the tip of my tongue, my name...

Kittredge! Hart, Shaffner and Kittredge.

- Oh, Kittredge. - Yes. You know me?

Oh, yes. My husband has spoken of you many times.

Your husband? Oh, you mean you and Vanescu are...

Congratulations.

Vanescu is in great danger, Mr. Kittredge, and so am I.

- We need a friend. - A friend?

Yeah, well, who do I know? Let me see.

Look at me.

It's warm, isn't it?

Oh, there, that's better.

Oh! This month's PEEP. Well...

Oh, yes, I've seen that.

Mr. Kittredge, I feel that I can trust you.

A voice speaks to me here.

Oh, there.

If I take you to my husband,

will you help him get out of town, far away from here?

- With pleasure. - Come, then. We will go together.

That's a nice way to travel.

How shall we go? Shall we ride or shall we walk?

I don't know about you, but I'm flying.

- This won't delay you? - No, no.

You're not keeping me from doing a thing. My time is your time.

Madame, would like to hear any request numbers?

Yes. Have you got a tune to fit a murder?

(ALARMS BLARING)

- We're trapped. Let's surrender. - No. Come on!

Hey! What are we running for? It's only a blackout.

Please, hurry!

- Follow me closely. - Closely? I'm practically glued to you now.

Give me your hand.

WOMAN: Is you scared, Hubert? KIT: Me? No, I always shake like this.

Hubert?

- Come on, Georgia. - Flirt!

- WARDEN: Hey, douse that light. - Give me your hand first.

This way. Up these steps.

Come in.

Okay. But remember, one false move and I'm yours.

(SNIFFING)

What did he have for dinner? Spaghetti and mothballs?

It's a very old house.

I'll find Gregory and tell him you are here.

- Wait in there. - Alone?

- Where is he? - He's in the other room.

Good.

When our crazy friend finishes with him,

he'll be too frightened to ever bother us again.

Gee, I wish I had a knife.

Thanks.

MAN: Nice evening.

I wonder.

You didn't expect to see me here, did you?

No, I...

Say, do you know where Vanescu is?

I know everything.

You look pretty old to be one of the Quiz Kids.

Follow me.

Cozy little nook. What time do the bats fly out?

You're a cool one, ain't you?

You care for a drink?

Well, I don't mind if I do.

Sorry.

Say when.

When.

Pretty stiff drink.

It's nothing compared to what I'm gonna have when I get out of here.

Have you read the evening paper?

- Is this the latest? - Just came out.

Now then, who give you that information?

- Wait a minute. Are you kidding? - Who's the traitor?

- I don't get it. - You didn't?

Then how did Lincoln know

that Stonewall Jackson was in the Shenandoah Valley, huh?

Well, I don't know. I didn't tell him. Honest.

You Yankee spy!

He's our man, Cartwright.

Oh, I hadn't noticed Cartwright.

How do you do?

- You sure he hasn't been drafted? - Are you going to talk?

Well, now, wait a minute. I'm the wrong guy. I just got in town.

I just flew here from New York.

You flew here? Like a bird?

You wouldn't try to make me think you're crazy, would you?

Oh, no, no.

Did you ever hear of a little game called "Bullet, bullet, who's got the bullet"?

Look, I'm not interested in any cross-ventilation right now.

You see in there?

They's five empty chambers and one cartridge, see?

Now, then, we don't know where the bullet is, do we?

(CLICKS)

That wasn't it, was it?

Wasn't it?

- Do you like the game, Yankee? - Yeah, but I don't like the odds.

Oh, don't worry, they keep changing.

Now, then, do you want to tell me who you bought off?

- Could I have another drink? - You ain't finished the one you got.

Yeah, well, just put a head on it.

Look, grandpa, let's take it from back where I came in.

- Flew in, you said. - Take it down. I'll talk.

Now, that's better.

- Now, then... - Cartwright, you've got an honest face.

You won't let this happen to me. Go on, tell him the truth.

You know I'm innocent.

Why, Cartwright suspected you right from the start, Yankee, didn't you?

He's lying.

He's trying to protect himself. There's your man.

He's the one who tipped me off. Go on, search him.

He's got Union money right in his pocket. There's your traitor!

You, Cartwright.

My best friend. I can't...

There he goes, he's making a break for it.

Here, cover him with this.

Poor guy. What time did... Hey! Hey! Hey!

Poor guy. What time did... Hey! Hey! Hey!

What are you trying to do?

I can't get out. I'm trapped. He locked me in here, he took the key.

- How did you get in here? - Through the door, of course.

- Who are you talking about? - A Confederate spy.

He tried to kill me. He just went through that wall.

- Confederate spy? - Yes.

You have got the right idea, but the wrong war.

Oh, you think so, huh? Well, just take a look at Cartwright.

Oh, no, forget about it.

I have looked in every room, but there is no sign of Gregory.

Something must have happened to him.

Oh, that's silly. What could happen to anyone in this house?

A while ago, I thought I heard a shot.

I thought I heard three shots.

Even my shoelaces are unstrung.

(EX CLAIMS)

- What is it? - There! That shoe!

- Well? - I think there's a foot in it.

Somebody went out and forgot his foot.

(GASPS)

Vanescu!

Oh, Gregory! My poor husband.

(CRYING)

They've killed him.

You must avenge him.

You were his friend.

Well, as a matter of fact, we hardly knew each other.

Oh, please, take me out of this dreadful place.

Yeah. With pleasure.

- Where to? - My apartment, to the Chelsea House.

Squealer.

- There, do you feel any better? - Yes, thank you.

- A little. - Oh, fine.

Now it's my turn to faint.

Boy, getting out of that place alive

is the biggest surprise I've had since Brooklyn won a pennant.

You are so brave, Mr. Kittredge, so understanding.

Call me Bob. All my friends call me Bob.

Yes, Bob. And you must call me Olga.

Olga?

Say, did Vanescu ever tell you who was after him and why he was hiding?

No.

Only that he was afraid, afraid somebody was trying to kill him.

He was right about that.

Tell me, did he ever mention the Gestapo here in Washington?

The Gestapo, here? Oh, no, you must be mistaken.

Oh, no, I'm not.

The first time I met your husband was in Ankara.

The Gestapo was after him.

Then in Budapest, again the Gestapo, and they were gaining on him.

In Paris, they just missed him by an eyelash.

Mark my words, Olga, your husband was killed by German agents.

You may be right.

My husband had some letters in German.

- They may be here. - Oh, that's great.

They may give us a lead.

I will look very carefully.

- Well, what about Kittredge? - He's going ahead with his investigation.

How much does he know?

He is convinced the Gestapo murdered Vanescu,

and he knew enough to come to the Cafe Moresque looking for him.

I know what to do. We must eliminate Kittredge at once.

- Not so loud. - The man is dangerous, Fauscheim.

He is a reporter. He'll keep going after his story.

Let me handle this and our troubles are over.

Except that murdering him will convince everybody,

the police, other reporters, that he really did have a story.

No. There is a better way.

Destroy his reputation.

Destroy him professionally.

Make him the laughingstock.

Then he can talk as much as he wants to. Nobody will believe him.

He can write, too, but nobody will print it.

I have a plan.

See that he smokes one of these.

When he wakes up,

he will find himself married to a very dear friend of mine.

"M."

Olga? Vanescu? "M"?

Maybe she's a mother.

"M."

I couldn't find the letters,

but perhaps if we talk, I may be able to help you.

I'm sure you can tell me a lot.

Shall we have a drink?

Some brandy might revive me. I still feel a bit faint.

Sure.

I've been a bit groggy myself,

but I think I'm beginning to snap out of it.

That's fine.

I am sure you will like this. It is very old.

- Cigarette? - Oh, sure. Let's live.

- Aren't you going to drink with me, Bob? - Oh, I'll say.

Oh, lovely brandy.

How's yours?

I drink to you.

Never has a meeting with any man made such an impression on me.

You haven't begun to feel it yet.

You're beginning to feel it now, aren't you?

Feel what?

That dope in the brandy got in the wrong dope.

The jig's up. Now I know who you are.

The Andrews Sisters.

You see? Just try and walk.

I switched the drinks while you were giving me a cigarette.

I thought that drink would be drugged.

Wait a minute.

It's useless to try and get away, Mrs. Whatever-Your-Name-ls.

Just try and make the door.

(LAUGHING)

Doped brandy, huh?

If you think you can pull any of those corny stunts on a hep guy like me,

then my name isn't Kobert Rittkedge.

FAUSCHEIM: It's all very simple, Gloria.

We have arranged for the marriage license,

the plane to Niagara Falls and everything.

When our friend wakes up in the hotel, you will be Mrs. Robert Kittredge.

- What's your angle? - We have no angles.

He is a fresh reporter who prints lies about our business.

- Well, I don't want to get in no trouble. - Trouble?

$500 is no trouble.

The publicity is free, and we'll see that there is plenty of it.

Okay. Go out and order the orange blossoms.

That's fine, Gloria.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Good morning. All right, Wilbur, now.

Best wishes and good luck, sir

May all your dreams go well

And all your joys be girls and boys

From the Niagara Falls Hotel

Hey, what is this? Anyone would think I got married.

Well, to all intents and purposes, sir...

Really?

Well, what do you know? So she finally got me, huh?

Chris!

Oh, Chris!

Oh, pardon me.

Why, you darling! Oh, honey, thanks a million.

(EX CLAIMING)

Look, I'm a stranger in town. Could you tell me...

Who posed for that?

Good morning, I bring you greetings

A honeymoon table for two

That you breakfast together for ever and ever

Is the management's wish for you

Oh, that's fine. That's fine.

Go shoot your singing teacher. That's fine.

Hey!

- Where's Chris? Were you at our wedding? - Yeah, I was there.

(WOMAN LAUGHING)

Oh, mister, I made a fine speech for you, but I forgot.

Here is a rose, and I wish you all the happiness in the world.

Wait a minute! What's going on here?

Hey, what's that? Huh?

Well, it ain't a sprinkler system, duckie. We're in Niagara Falls.

Niagara Falls? Well, what am I doing here? I'm in Washington.

He thinks he's in Washington!

Look, will you come back later and do that?

Any time. Tomorrow, next year, any time.

- And cheer up. - Cheer up!

You think you're in Washington, but you're in Niagara Falls.

Yeah, thanks.

What's happening? Where am I? Who are you?

Well, the name I got married under is Tillie Hoferkamp.

Tillie Hofer-who?

Professionally known as Gloria, the Glow Girl.

- Gloria, the Glow Girl? - That's me.

All right, so you got married. What's that to me?

Gloria, the Glow Girl.

When the blue of the night

That guy's haunting me. Listen, you, how did I get here?

- lf this is a gag, you... - I beg your pardon.

Now what do you want to do? Wipe my windshield?

I just want to be sure that you're perfectly happy.

Oh, it's divine!

Oh, we have innumerable recreation facilities at your disposal.

Golf, tennis, swimming,

or perhaps a nice secluded hammock under a maple tree, or...

Have you got a barrel?

I thought I might like to ride over the Falls.

Oh, now, come, come, come, now, Mr. Kittredge!

Or would you like to?

Oh, no. No, not again.

All right, now. What's the story? Come on, give it to me.

You got it.

- Hey, this is a marriage license. - It ain't a diploma.

Kittredge. That's my name, that's me!

You're on your honeymoon, kid.

Oh, no. Oh, no, you don't.

I can get this annulled. I'll prove I was doped.

I'll demand a saliva test. I'll get you ruled off the track, for life!

- This can't happen here! - Hey, Kittredge, how about a story?

Hold it! Pardon me!

REPORTER: Come on, boys! Get him. There he goes.

(REPORTERS CHATTERING)

Hold it like that, Kittredge. You look funny.

- Hold it, Kittredge. - PHOTOGRAPHER: One more.

They got me covered.

MAN: There he goes!

Hey, fellas, get a load of this, will you? This is the latest one.

What do you know about that?

Hey! Hey, wait a minute. Here.

You don't want to do that, son. A nice young fella like you.

- What's your name? - Robert Kittredge.

Kittredge?

Go ahead. Jump.

Here, take a look at the papers.

The Star has another layout on Kittredge and his bride.

I wouldn't mind seeing Kittredge laid out, and not in the newspaper.

(WHISTLES)

What a dish he picked out for himself!

There's enough peroxide in her to disinfect the whole German Embassy!

Why do you suppose it is that every time a man gets drunk,

he falls for the first blonde that waves an eyelash his way?

What are you talking about? What blonde?

Mrs. Glow Girl Kittredge, that's the blonde.

That's not the woman.

I saw him leave the caf�. It was a different woman entirely.

It's true. He wasn't lying.

He was framed into that silly marriage.

When he tried to tell me about it, I hung up on him.

I'll never forgive myself.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

A moment ago, you were never going to forgive Kittredge.

That's the taxi I ordered for my baggage.

Tell him I've changed my mind.

I'm going to unpack this stuff, and, kids, we're going to...

I know how you feel.

Yep, well, here I am, the answer to a moron's prayer.

Go on, let me have it, all of you.

I'm innocent, but nobody believes me.

I believe you.

Oh, Kit, darling!

You're right not to have anything to do with me, Chris.

Find somebody else. Forget me.

I only came to say goodbye.

You big idiot! I don't want anybody else.

And don't you dare say goodbye to me.

(ALL WHISTLING)

That's right. Kick a man when he's down.

Oh, Chris, keep kicking. I need it.

From here, you'd never know which one of them was doped.

Come on, girls, we're in the way here.

Honey, if I ever get out of this jam,

I'll never marry any other girls as long as I live,

especially strangers.

I was afraid you'd fallen for that slinky brunette at Cafe Moresque.

- I thought she was the one you married. - No such luck.

Oh, I mean, that would have been awful.

You see, honey, that's the dame that slipped me the mickey.

When I passed out, they rang in Gloria, the Glow Girl.

Well, what about her? After all, she's your wife.

Yeah, but you're the girl I'm engaged to.

Gloria is just a stooge.

If I can get to her, maybe I can find out who hired her.

- That other dame's the one I want. - What?

For evidence.

Have you tried the caf�? Her apartment?

Yeah, they kicked me out. I can still feel it.

Well, haven't you any idea who she is or where to find her?

I've got one lead, a handkerchief.

I picked this up in her apartment last night.

The initial might give us a clue.

Here, let me see that.

What are you going to do, hire bloodhounds?

I'll show you.

Mildred, Lucille, come on, there's work to be done.

Yeah, bring in the WAACs.

- You just relax. I'll handle this. - What is it, Chris?

Look, kids, Kit has a clue to the woman who doped him.

Well, right now, it's only a smell, but we might build it into something big.

It's this handkerchief.

- Say, that's nice. What is it? - That's up to you.

It's an expensive perfume, and probably a very rare one.

Can you get one of the chemists over at the FBI to analyze it for us?

Sure.

Oh, that's swell. Get right to work on it, will you, kids?

- You leave it to us, Kit. - Right.

- Thanks. - Thanks, kids.

Gee, you're a great girl, Chris.

You're the only girl I've ever cared about.

The only girl in the whole world for me.

Gee, I might get in to see my wife now.

There you are.

I'm not proud, and I'm not too particular how I earn my living.

There's just one thing little Gloria ain't going to do,

and that's front for a bunch of swastinkers.

You can tell your boys all bets are off.

- So! - Exactly so.

There's a lot of freedom in this country, and I want to go on enjoying it.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

MAN: Ready for the snowball number, Gloria.

Okay.

I'm getting in touch with Kittredge.

There's going to be no secrets from my husband.

I'm telling him everything.

That would be very unwise, my dear.

Remember, an empty head is better than none at all.

(WHISPERING) Gloria! Gloria!

- Say, you're just the one I want to see. - Look, I'm in a terrible jam,

- and you've got to get me out of it. - Yes, I know, but...

You know who framed me, and why it was done.

Now, you've got to give me the inside. You've just got to tell me the truth.

- Sure. Sure I will. - Huh?

Well, come on. What are we waiting for?

I've got to go on.

- Wait here till I come back. - Okay.

Palsy Walsy, my old pie-face

Since I met you, I'm a dead duck

Palsy Walsy, you old sly-face

Can't forget you, reckon I'm stuck

Through thick, through thin

Or any "How've you been?"

We'll grin and take it on the chin

Who's excited?

Plan your campaign

You'll get my vote

I'll take champagne or beer

Because you are my Palsy Walsy, dear

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

- Are you through? - In a minute.

- Yes, but I can't... - Not now, buddy. She goes right on again.

Palsy Walsy, you old nifty

I'm your pigeon, sharing your lot

Palsy Walsy, fifty-fifty

With a smidgeon or with a yacht

Come rain, come snow

The icy winds may blow

And go to forty-five below

Who's excited?

Rooms or hallways, wait for baby

Because you are my Palsy Walsy, dear

Through thick, through thin

Or any "How've you been?"

We'll grin and take it on the chin

Who's excited?

Plan your campaign

You'll get my vote

I'll take champagne or beer

Because you are my Palsy Walsy, dear

- What is it? - It's my...

What happened, Gloria?

- What's the matter with her? - She's been hurt.

(COUGHING)

Who did it, Gloria? What happened?

Come on, kid, try and tell me. Who was it?

Here, somebody hold her.

- We'd better get a doctor. - It's too late, Joe. She's gone.

(CAR DRIVING AWAY)

Okay. You've got me.

Don't shoot. I'll talk.

I suppose you want to know what I'm doing here, right?

Is that right?

What's the matter? You nervous, too?

(WHISTLING)

There's someone in the shop. Quick, go round the back.

That peg is good for something.

- Is it? - Yeah, my back was itching and I...

How did you get in here?

Through the window. Isn't this the YMCA?

You must lose a lot of trade keeping that front door locked.

- What are you doing with that book? - Huh?

Oh, just browsing.

I'm an old book lover, see?

Give me a book and a fireplace and a cozy chair and I'm asleep in no time.

You will answer my questions much more respectfully before long, Mr. Kittredge.

What do you want? Why did you get here?

I love flowers, like Ferdinand the Bull. I just want to sit here and smell.

Oh, no, not that! Why, Holtz, you...

All right, all right!

Get back there! Put your hands up and keep 'em up.

Now I've got the gun.

Imagine falling for an old gag like that.

You don't go to the movies very often, do you?

I've got a few questions to ask you, and you'd better answer them quickly

or your friends are going to be walking behind you slowly.

Did you ever hear of a game called "Bullet, bullet, who's got the bullet?"

Who sent that corsage to Gloria's dressing room tonight?

- A man paid cash for that, gave no name. - That's a lie!

All your orders are listed in the book, including cash sales.

There's nothing there about an orchid corsage.

My bookkeeper made a mistake.

I suppose he knifed Gloria tonight because he wanted to balance the books, huh?

Where's Sally Branch, the girl you kidnapped?

You've got Sally, and you're going to lead me to her.

Hey, that's my gag. Trying to make me look away, huh?

Well, I'm not falling for it, see,

because I happen to be a little smarter than you are.

I can out-think you and out-guess you, and you know why? Because I use this.

Hey, look where I'm pointing, here.

Okay, take care of it right away.

- What I had to promise to get this! - Okay, Lucille, spill it.

The perfume is imported by a New York concern.

Its exclusive Washington agent is the La Roche Beauty Salon,

1757 Rhode Island Avenue, North West.

Hand me that directory.

Now, what about the Chelsea House?

Chelsea. You got it? Good.

Yeah.

Go ahead.

Wait a minute, Lucille.

- Did you get anything, Helen? - Plenty.

The Cafe Moresque and Chelsea House

are both owned by a holding company, Favini Enterprises.

They're both in the red and haven't paid taxes in years.

- Well, what about... - Wait a minute. What was that?

But they have one place that's a gold mine,

the La Roche Beauty Salon.

That's all I want to know.

Thanks, sugar.

What's up, Chris?

The flower shop that Kittredge went to last night

is directly in back of the beauty salon.

I'm calling on that shop, kids.

I smell something funny, and it isn't their perfume.

Oh, I am sure you are mistaken.

We haven't stocked any Reprise for more than a year.

The war, you know. Those dreadful Nazis.

Yes, aren't they?

Well, I'm sorry to have bothered you.

Oh, not at all, it's perfectly all right.

Still, as long as I'm here and your shop is so attractive,

could I get a facial and a massage?

Why, of course. This way, please.

- Katrina! - Ja?

Will you take care of Miss...

- Jordan, Frances Jordan. - Thank you.

- I'll take your things, Miss Jordan. - Thank you.

Right this way, please, Miss Jordan.

Christina Hill?

Yes?

Tell Katrina that the girl who is with her is a spy.

- She will take care of her. - Yes, ma'am.

- You live in Washington, Miss Jordan? - No, I'm just visiting for a few days.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Oh, excuse me. I will be right back.

Get undressed.

Mildred Smith, please.

Hello, Mildred. Get this, honey.

I'm at the La Roche Beauty Salon, and I'm afraid that...

Yes, Mildred, this is the most marvelous place.

I want you and the girls to come right over.

It's just wonderful.

Oh, they are?

Fine. Bring them, too.

(SCREAMING)

Go to my office and stay out of sight until we call you.

- Certainly. - Faber.

Come with us.

Kittredge!

(EX CLAIMS)

Search there!

No, come with me.

- Did you find him? - I looked everywhere, Herr Fauscheim.

- Did you look in every room? - He is not on this floor.

- Are you sure? - I'm positive.

(WHISTLING)

That's him!

FAUSCHEIM: In there!

A bunch of fellows in there are trying to kill me.

Down the hall, they're 89 cents apiece.

- He got away. - Impossible.

Now, listen, let's get everybody together in the showroom at once.

- We must get into action immediately. - Yes, Herr Fauscheim.

Faber!

What's happened? Where is Kittredge?

He's hiding somewhere. Search every room.

Oh, pardon me, madam.

Pardon me.

Sally!

FAUSCHEIM: Holtz. Holtz, look in that room.

HOLTZ: Later, I'll look around here first.

I'll be back, don't go away.

Oh, pardon me, I...

(ALL CHATTERING)

- MAN: Well, it won't take long. - Yes.

Take your places, please.

FAUSCHEIM: Your attention!

We are about to execute our plan.

I want no slip-ups, no bungling, even if it costs your lives.

On you, here in this room, may depend the future of the Fatherland.

Our friends all over this country are waiting to spring into action

the moment we have succeeded.

Washington first, then every important city in America.

Gentlemen, we must act quickly.

Holtz!

I will now distribute the dynamite.

(RINGING)

Hello?

Hello?

(RINGING)

Hello?

Hello?

It must be out of order. Leave it alone.

Straeger, what are your orders?

I am to wait at the fire department headquarters until my signal.

FAUSCHEIM: Yes?

When the water main is blown up,

I dynamite the signal board in the fire department.

FAUSCHEIM: Very good, Straeger. You must not fail.

Faber, you will tell Katrina to assign her girls to their various posts.

See that everything is in order.

Not a stone must be left unturned.

FABER: Yes, Herr Fauscheim.

BALDANACCO: My men are prepared to poison the water in the reservoir.

And men in my employ are ready to drop incendiary bombs on the airport.

FAUSCHEIM: It is understood they are to wait for the signal.

BALDANACCO: My men are dependable. Everything is in order.

FAUSCHEIM: Each of you has a particular task to perform

and this must be done with clockwork precision.

HOLTZ: Ja, Herr Fauscheim.

FAUSCHEIM: To fail now would be suicidal.

Our efforts will be amply rewarded by the F�hrer.

FAUSCHEIM: Margot, have your orders been carried out?

MARGOT: Yes. Transportation has been arranged.

After our work is finished here, we will leave for our hideout in New York.

FAUSCHEIM: Good.

Schmidt!

What are your instructions?

I am to wait until Straeger's explosion has gone off in the fire department.

Then I am to dynamite the police broadcasting station.

FAUSCHEIM: Correct. Thank you.

Each man must wait until the signal is given for his particular task.

This way, the alarms follow each other and cause great panic and confusion.

Gerhardt, you are assigned to the power plant at the Union Station.

Ja, Holtz is to accompany me.

But if Holtz does not take care of the guard,

I cannot do my part.

Don't worry. I will take care of the sentry.

My hand is steady.

Look, Herr Fauscheim, right through the heart!

FAUSCHEIM: Excellent! SCHMIDT: Kolossal!

BALDANACCO: Very good, Holtz.

- You see, Herr Fauscheim? - You missed.

He could still call for help. Death must be instant.

All right, watch this.

Right between the eyes!

BALDANACCO: Very good, Holtz. SCHMIDT: Kolossal!

- Excellent! - I think so.

A lucky throw.

Lucky?

All right, I'll show you.

Enough of this bickering. Stop it, both of you.

We have work to do. Holtz will do his share.

Herr Fauscheim, my ability has been criticized.

I ask this opportunity to prove myself.

It isn't necessary. I'm satisfied.

HOLTZ: I insist on another throw to demonstrate my accuracy.

No.

- Yes. - No!

FAUSCHEIM: Very well then.

The dummy there on the bicycle.

Pierce the head squarely in the center.

Ja, Herr Fauscheim.

- It's Kittredge! - Get him!

This time you won't escape.

(ALL CLAMORING)

FAUSCHEIM: Holtz, go after him! Get him!

- Holtz! - Schultz! Schultz!

MAN: Let's get him!

Go downstairs.

Lock the doors. Hurry.

Quick, lock the doors, keep everyone out.

The shop is closed. Lock the doors. Go on.

- May we have an appointment? - I'd like to have my hair done.

Oh, just a minute, please. The shop is closed.

- But I have to have my nails done. - And I have a date tonight!

- What do you want? - Me? Oh, I want a facial.

What?

- Look! There's Chris! - Help!

LUCILLE: Well, come on.

The place is full of spies. Upstairs, quick!

Come on, let's find Sally.

MAN: Get him, boys.

This is the place, boys. They're all right in here.

(PHONE RINGING)

Here's a couple more.

Sorry, we're busy.

Do you give up? Do you give up?

Kit!

Pull a knife on me, will you? Come on, tell me!

- Kit! Kit, honey! Are you all right? - All right!

Look, I think I killed one of the big ones. I think...

Nice going, Kit. Looks like another Pulitzer Prize.

- Yes, sir, I rounded them up single-handed. - You sure did.

We had these babies staked out for months.

- You just speeded things up a bit. - Hold it, please. Thank you.

All right, boys. Let's get 'em out of here.

- MAN: Let's go. - See you later, honey.

I sure wish I could have got my hands on that one.

- What? - I would have killed her.

Come on!

That's to save your face.

And this is for you.