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1
00:00:17,595 --> 00:00:20,462
Some poor mastodon
is caught in the tar pit.
2
00:00:20,999 --> 00:00:23,934
They ought to put a fence
around the tar pit.
3
00:00:24,669 --> 00:00:27,866
That's not a mastodon. It's Fred singing.
4
00:00:28,873 --> 00:00:31,171
They ought to put a fence around him.
5
00:01:29,934 --> 00:01:33,961
Let's see now, the tralafast
is connected to the doohickey...
6
00:01:34,405 --> 00:01:37,465
the doohickey
is connected to the franaspan...
7
00:01:37,642 --> 00:01:40,167
the franaspan's connected
to the thingamajig.
8
00:01:40,478 --> 00:01:44,278
The thingamajig's connected
to the whozit, and the whozit...
9
00:01:44,415 --> 00:01:47,282
That's it. The whozit isn't connected.
10
00:01:47,952 --> 00:01:50,819
Betty! Come to the window a minute.
11
00:01:52,924 --> 00:01:56,291
- What is it, Barney?
- I'm going over to see if Fred's home.
12
00:01:56,394 --> 00:01:59,522
- I got to borrow a whozit wrench.
- Okay, Barney.
13
00:01:59,664 --> 00:02:01,689
Say hello to Wilma for me.
14
00:02:09,307 --> 00:02:13,641
I don't know what we housewives
would do without a good waste disposal.
15
00:02:22,554 --> 00:02:26,456
- Anybody home?
- Just a minute, Barney. I'll be right there.
16
00:02:29,494 --> 00:02:32,622
Hiya, Wilma. Betty says to say hello.
17
00:02:32,764 --> 00:02:34,732
So I'm saying hello.
18
00:02:35,333 --> 00:02:37,267
You say hello to her for me.
19
00:02:37,335 --> 00:02:39,895
- Is Fred home yet?
- Not yet, Barney.
20
00:02:39,971 --> 00:02:43,771
He must be caught in a traffic jam.
What do you want him for?
21
00:02:43,942 --> 00:02:46,433
I wanted to borrow a whozit wrench
from him.
22
00:02:46,511 --> 00:02:48,411
But it can wait, Wilma.
23
00:02:50,014 --> 00:02:52,676
A tall, frosty Cactus Coola.
24
00:02:53,017 --> 00:02:54,609
I'll come back later.
25
00:02:54,686 --> 00:02:57,587
Okay, Barney.
I'll tell him to call you when he gets home.
26
00:02:57,655 --> 00:02:58,815
Right.
27
00:02:58,890 --> 00:03:02,087
And by the way,
thanks for the hospitality, Wilma.
28
00:03:02,193 --> 00:03:04,093
You're welcome, Barney.
29
00:03:04,629 --> 00:03:06,790
That Barney is so polite.
30
00:03:07,398 --> 00:03:09,059
Such good manners.
31
00:03:10,068 --> 00:03:12,969
I wish Fred
would learn to be more like him.
32
00:03:13,771 --> 00:03:16,103
Fred's a diamond in the rough...
33
00:03:16,207 --> 00:03:18,971
but even diamonds can stand polishing.
34
00:03:20,011 --> 00:03:23,572
I'd love it if he'd
come through that door every night...
35
00:03:23,781 --> 00:03:27,808
calm, urbane, with a smile on his lips.
36
00:03:35,159 --> 00:03:38,287
Hello, Fred. I see you finally got home.
37
00:03:41,099 --> 00:03:43,727
- Did you have a tough day, dear?
- Yeah.
38
00:03:45,269 --> 00:03:47,134
And it was so hot.
39
00:03:47,405 --> 00:03:49,805
I bet it was terrible on the job.
40
00:03:52,577 --> 00:03:55,068
And the traffic must've been awful.
41
00:03:57,982 --> 00:04:01,509
A diamond in the rough,
and they don't come any rougher.
42
00:04:01,686 --> 00:04:03,210
What a day.
43
00:04:05,823 --> 00:04:08,724
But in all that heavy traffic coming home...
44
00:04:08,793 --> 00:04:11,091
one thing kept me going.
45
00:04:11,362 --> 00:04:14,627
As the car reached the lawn, I could see it.
46
00:04:14,699 --> 00:04:18,863
There it was, right in front of me,
big as life.
47
00:04:19,070 --> 00:04:20,435
What was it, Fred?
48
00:04:20,505 --> 00:04:24,134
That frosty, cold bottle of Cactus Coola...
49
00:04:24,308 --> 00:04:26,640
I put in the icebox last night.
50
00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:32,944
Fred, you're so overheated,
you shouldn't drink anything cold.
51
00:04:33,584 --> 00:04:36,178
Suck a lemon. That'll quench your thirst.
52
00:04:36,254 --> 00:04:39,655
Suck a lemon? Are you out of your mind?
53
00:04:39,957 --> 00:04:43,791
All the way home
I kept thinking of that tall...
54
00:04:43,861 --> 00:04:46,853
cold, frosty cactus juice...
55
00:04:46,931 --> 00:04:50,662
trickling down my hot throat.
56
00:04:51,436 --> 00:04:52,960
Suck a lemon.
57
00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:58,470
I got to hand it to you, Wilma.
58
00:04:59,043 --> 00:05:01,341
You got a great sense of humor.
59
00:05:05,383 --> 00:05:08,147
I'm sorry I came home so grouchy.
60
00:05:08,586 --> 00:05:13,114
But it won't happen again.
I am turning over a new leaf.
61
00:05:13,825 --> 00:05:15,486
No more yelling.
62
00:05:17,028 --> 00:05:19,053
No more acting mean.
63
00:05:22,233 --> 00:05:25,430
Wilma! Where is it?
64
00:05:25,770 --> 00:05:27,362
Where is what, Fred?
65
00:05:27,638 --> 00:05:31,734
My last bottle of cold Cactus Coola.
66
00:05:32,243 --> 00:05:36,304
- Did you drink it, Wilma? Did you?
- No, Fred, I didn't.
67
00:05:39,117 --> 00:05:40,641
Barney took it.
68
00:05:42,553 --> 00:05:44,077
Barney took it?
69
00:05:44,188 --> 00:05:47,316
- Yes. He's your friend, isn't he?
- Friend?
70
00:05:47,458 --> 00:05:51,394
No friend would take
a man's last cold bottle...
71
00:05:51,462 --> 00:05:52,929
on a hot day.
72
00:05:53,498 --> 00:05:55,693
That does it. This is it!
73
00:05:55,767 --> 00:05:59,464
It's been coming on a long time,
but this did it!
74
00:05:59,971 --> 00:06:04,340
I am through with that Barney Rubble.
I disown him as a neighbor.
75
00:06:04,408 --> 00:06:07,536
- Aw, Fred.
- Don't "Aw, Fred" me.
76
00:06:07,612 --> 00:06:10,342
I'm never gonna speak to that guy again.
77
00:06:10,414 --> 00:06:13,941
And I'm going over to his house right now
and tell him.
78
00:06:14,152 --> 00:06:16,950
I'll give him a piece of my mind.
79
00:06:17,088 --> 00:06:20,683
Not too big a piece, Fred.
You haven't any to spare.
80
00:06:20,825 --> 00:06:24,124
Haven't any to spare. How droll.
81
00:06:24,362 --> 00:06:26,956
How very droll.
82
00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:32,700
The doohickey's connected
to the franaspan.
83
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:39,476
Hello, Fred. What happened?
Did you get caught in traffic?
84
00:06:41,479 --> 00:06:46,246
- What's the matter, Fred?
- Barney, you and I are through.
85
00:06:46,617 --> 00:06:49,814
Don't ever speak to me again.
We are finished.
86
00:06:50,421 --> 00:06:55,154
I'm returning your lawnmower, your rake,
your hedge shears, and your hose!
87
00:06:55,593 --> 00:06:59,188
- My power tools, too?
- Yes, your power tools, too.
88
00:06:59,263 --> 00:07:01,231
Gee, this is serious.
89
00:07:01,432 --> 00:07:04,162
You never returned
my power tools before.
90
00:07:06,370 --> 00:07:07,769
There it is.
91
00:07:08,039 --> 00:07:11,702
My Cactus Coola. You didn't get to it yet?
92
00:07:12,109 --> 00:07:15,408
And you won't either,
'cause I'm gonna drink it myself.
93
00:07:15,479 --> 00:07:18,073
No, Fred. No, wait, Fred.
94
00:07:21,118 --> 00:07:24,849
There, icebox raider. It's empty.
95
00:07:25,056 --> 00:07:26,819
How do you like that?
96
00:07:26,891 --> 00:07:29,086
Fred, may I ask one question?
97
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:31,628
Okay, but you better make it a good one...
98
00:07:31,696 --> 00:07:35,928
'cause it's the last time I'm talking to you.
Go ahead, ask.
99
00:07:36,267 --> 00:07:39,998
Okay, Fred.
Why did you drink my car polish?
100
00:07:40,071 --> 00:07:41,436
Car polish?
101
00:07:47,111 --> 00:07:49,545
Car polish! I'm poisoned.
102
00:07:49,714 --> 00:07:53,047
- Do something, Barney!
- I'll get a chamois.
103
00:07:53,384 --> 00:07:57,081
- Don't just stand there, do something!
- Like what, Fred?
104
00:07:57,154 --> 00:07:59,884
Like get a pump. Call a doctor.
Get a mechanic.
105
00:07:59,957 --> 00:08:02,790
How should I know? But do something.
106
00:08:11,502 --> 00:08:13,265
Fred, you all right?
107
00:08:15,706 --> 00:08:17,833
Betty. Come out here, quick.
108
00:08:17,909 --> 00:08:22,346
- I can't, I'm in the shower.
- Turn it off. It's an emergency.
109
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:25,381
All right. Hold it, Trixie.
110
00:08:28,653 --> 00:08:32,885
It never fails. Soon as I get in the shower
that man wants something.
111
00:08:35,860 --> 00:08:37,487
What happened to Fred?
112
00:08:37,595 --> 00:08:39,358
I know it sounds stupid...
113
00:08:39,430 --> 00:08:43,127
but Fred hit himself on the head
with a bottle. He knocked himself cold.
114
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:46,658
Oh, dear.
I'd hate to tell that story to Wilma.
115
00:08:46,804 --> 00:08:48,533
What do you mean, Betty?
116
00:08:48,606 --> 00:08:52,303
I mean, think how embarrassed
Fred would feel if Wilma found out.
117
00:08:53,477 --> 00:08:57,140
Maybe we can sneak him into his house
and put him on his sofa...
118
00:08:57,214 --> 00:09:00,775
- and she'll think he's asleep.
- Sneak him into the house?
119
00:09:01,218 --> 00:09:05,018
Well, that's like sneaking an elephant
into a telephone booth.
120
00:09:05,222 --> 00:09:07,053
Anyway, let's give it a try.
121
00:09:09,894 --> 00:09:12,419
Easy, Barney, easy.
122
00:09:13,664 --> 00:09:16,531
Let's stop a minute
while I catch my breath.
123
00:09:16,934 --> 00:09:19,767
- Let's lean him up against the door.
- Okay.
124
00:09:20,538 --> 00:09:24,531
Oh, boy! He's a load to lug around.
125
00:09:32,917 --> 00:09:36,785
Hiya, Wilma. So, what else is new?
126
00:09:36,921 --> 00:09:39,947
We brought Fred home.
127
00:09:40,024 --> 00:09:43,460
- What happened?
- It could happen to anyone.
128
00:09:43,527 --> 00:09:46,587
Yeah, Fred hit himself on the head
with a bottle.
129
00:09:46,664 --> 00:09:49,292
Hit himself on the head with a bottle?
130
00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:52,865
Get him into bed, Barney. I'll call a doctor.
131
00:09:55,039 --> 00:09:59,738
Gee, Fred's been out a long time.
I wish the doctor would get here.
132
00:09:59,810 --> 00:10:02,643
When I called, he said he'd be right over.
133
00:10:04,515 --> 00:10:07,313
That's him now. Come in, Doctor.
134
00:10:09,053 --> 00:10:11,681
Have no fear, medical science is here.
135
00:10:13,691 --> 00:10:15,318
I'm just in time.
136
00:10:15,593 --> 00:10:18,619
My, you don't look good at all, not at all.
137
00:10:20,965 --> 00:10:25,527
See, now what did I tell you?
Loosen your shirt, we may have to tap.
138
00:10:26,137 --> 00:10:28,935
- Is it serious, Doc?
- Don't worry about it, son.
139
00:10:29,006 --> 00:10:30,769
I never lost a patient yet.
140
00:10:30,841 --> 00:10:34,004
Some don't get better,
but I always know where they are.
141
00:10:35,980 --> 00:10:38,346
That's a joke we use down at the clinic.
142
00:10:38,416 --> 00:10:40,077
- Doctor.
- Yes?
143
00:10:40,151 --> 00:10:42,051
That's not the patient.
144
00:10:43,521 --> 00:10:46,979
Oh, my. That's too bad.
You could use some help.
145
00:10:47,058 --> 00:10:49,049
But let's get on with it.
146
00:10:49,393 --> 00:10:51,122
All right, madam...
147
00:10:51,796 --> 00:10:55,254
- stick out your tongue.
- Are you kidding? I'm not sick.
148
00:10:55,766 --> 00:10:59,702
We doctors are so busy.
Seems everybody is sick.
149
00:10:59,770 --> 00:11:01,670
There you are, my dear.
150
00:11:03,140 --> 00:11:06,473
- Where does it hurt?
- I'm not sick either.
151
00:11:06,977 --> 00:11:08,968
I must insist upon quiet.
152
00:11:10,514 --> 00:11:14,348
- This man is trying to get some rest.
- That's the patient!
153
00:11:14,418 --> 00:11:15,908
That's the...
154
00:11:17,621 --> 00:11:19,248
I'm not a mind reader, you know.
155
00:11:19,323 --> 00:11:22,451
I can't diagnose
when you don't tell the doctor everything.
156
00:11:22,526 --> 00:11:25,120
He got hit on the head with a bottle.
157
00:11:25,663 --> 00:11:26,925
A bottle?
158
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:34,062
You shouldn't hit him with a bottle.
A rolling pin, yes, maybe, but not a bottle.
159
00:11:35,172 --> 00:11:39,472
- Can you hear me, Doctor?
- Yes, very clearly.
160
00:11:39,543 --> 00:11:42,068
- Yes, indeed.
- Okay...
161
00:11:43,814 --> 00:11:46,942
Now hear this. Get lost!
162
00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:53,451
I always wanted
to have a human patient just once.
163
00:11:53,791 --> 00:11:56,885
But that's it.
So it's back to my horses for me.
164
00:11:58,195 --> 00:12:01,824
- Back to the pasture.
- Why, he's a veterinarian.
165
00:12:01,899 --> 00:12:04,299
I must've gotten the wrong list of doctors.
166
00:12:04,368 --> 00:12:06,962
I don't know. Fred eats like a horse.
167
00:12:11,108 --> 00:12:14,043
He's coming out of it. Fred, wake up.
168
00:12:16,347 --> 00:12:18,679
You feeling better? Speak to me.
169
00:12:19,583 --> 00:12:22,882
- Still out.
- I think I can snap him out of it.
170
00:12:22,953 --> 00:12:24,682
- How, Wilma?
- Watch.
171
00:12:25,656 --> 00:12:28,682
Fred, you want a hamburger?
172
00:12:30,628 --> 00:12:33,153
- That did it.
- Boy, did you see that?
173
00:12:33,230 --> 00:12:37,792
It's a good thing you didn't say pizza pie.
He would've gone through the ceiling.
174
00:12:37,868 --> 00:12:39,802
Are you feeling okay, Freddie-boy?
175
00:12:39,870 --> 00:12:42,998
Certainly, Bernard, my esteemed neighbor.
176
00:12:43,274 --> 00:12:46,334
Bernard? Are you all right, Freddie?
177
00:12:47,111 --> 00:12:49,909
Bernard, please, not Freddie.
178
00:12:50,181 --> 00:12:53,412
It's undignified. My name is Frederick.
179
00:12:53,584 --> 00:12:57,315
I'm sure you won't mind
addressing me properly.
180
00:12:57,855 --> 00:13:01,484
- What's wrong with him, Wilma?
- I don't know.
181
00:13:01,859 --> 00:13:04,089
But he'll snap out of it in a minute.
182
00:13:05,229 --> 00:13:08,096
There's my sweet, adorable wife...
183
00:13:08,165 --> 00:13:10,190
Iooking charming as usual.
184
00:13:10,267 --> 00:13:14,636
- How are you, my dear?
- See? He's all right. He knows me.
185
00:13:14,772 --> 00:13:16,137
Are you kidding?
186
00:13:16,207 --> 00:13:19,506
And there's Elizabeth, Bernard's wife...
187
00:13:19,577 --> 00:13:21,772
a vision of loveliness...
188
00:13:21,845 --> 00:13:23,403
a delight to the eye.
189
00:13:23,581 --> 00:13:26,345
Yeah, he's all right. He knows me, too.
190
00:13:30,054 --> 00:13:32,318
If you ask me, Fred's flipped his lid.
191
00:13:32,389 --> 00:13:35,722
Let's go home, Betty. A good night's sleep
will straighten him out.
192
00:13:35,793 --> 00:13:37,761
Okay. Good night, Wilma.
193
00:13:39,096 --> 00:13:42,065
Toodle-oo, Frederick, you old dear.
194
00:13:45,202 --> 00:13:49,764
I'm telling you, that sock on the noggin
knocked a screw loose in Fred's head.
195
00:13:50,374 --> 00:13:54,310
Why, Barney? Because he called me
a vision of loveliness?
196
00:13:54,712 --> 00:13:56,839
What's your opinion, Barney?
197
00:13:57,181 --> 00:14:00,548
That's sissy talk.
Regular guys don't talk like that.
198
00:14:00,618 --> 00:14:04,384
Never mind regular guys,
what's your opinion?
199
00:14:05,389 --> 00:14:07,983
Tell me what you think of me, Barney.
200
00:14:08,192 --> 00:14:10,956
- Betty, please.
- Say it, Barney.
201
00:14:12,296 --> 00:14:15,959
All right. You are a vision of loveliness.
202
00:14:21,672 --> 00:14:23,799
Allow me, Wilma.
203
00:14:26,910 --> 00:14:28,901
You're going to spoil me.
204
00:14:29,246 --> 00:14:31,771
You've been so attentive
the last few weeks.
205
00:14:31,849 --> 00:14:34,909
Nothing will ever spoil
my little turtledove.
206
00:14:35,352 --> 00:14:37,252
You just rest, my dear.
207
00:14:37,388 --> 00:14:40,949
Why don't you make a list of things
to augment your scanty wardrobe...
208
00:14:41,025 --> 00:14:43,391
whilst I finish doing the dishes?
209
00:14:43,460 --> 00:14:47,260
Thanks, Frederick. You're a dear.
210
00:14:49,033 --> 00:14:53,402
I could use some new dresses
and a fur coat.
211
00:15:02,446 --> 00:15:04,641
Good evening, friends.
212
00:15:04,915 --> 00:15:07,315
This is your Mystery Hour...
213
00:15:07,584 --> 00:15:09,245
brought to you by...
214
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,514
Barney!
215
00:15:12,056 --> 00:15:14,149
What's the matter with you?
216
00:15:14,925 --> 00:15:17,325
Is this any way to leave the towel?
217
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:20,693
You just wet your hands
and wiped the dirt off on it.
218
00:15:21,098 --> 00:15:24,261
Why can't you be neat and clean
like Frederick...
219
00:15:24,335 --> 00:15:27,998
and hang up your things?
All I do is pick up after you.
220
00:15:28,072 --> 00:15:31,701
Why, I even found one of your ties
with soup spots on it...
221
00:15:31,775 --> 00:15:33,766
stuffed in the flower vase.
222
00:15:33,844 --> 00:15:36,574
Frederick wouldn't do a thing like that.
223
00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:38,807
Why can't you be more like him?
224
00:15:38,882 --> 00:15:41,680
Frederick, I hate Frederick!
225
00:15:45,055 --> 00:15:47,922
Now, don't say so unless you mean it.
226
00:15:48,592 --> 00:15:50,719
Do you really like it, Frederick?
227
00:15:50,794 --> 00:15:55,094
I think it's superb, my dear. Very chic.
228
00:15:55,733 --> 00:15:59,362
But, Frederick, it's so expensive.
229
00:15:59,703 --> 00:16:01,933
We'll be paying on it for years.
230
00:16:02,005 --> 00:16:04,974
Details, my dear, mere details.
231
00:16:05,376 --> 00:16:09,073
I shall walk to work, skip lunches...
232
00:16:09,546 --> 00:16:12,447
make my old clothes do
for another five years...
233
00:16:12,516 --> 00:16:15,508
and before you know it, it shall be yours.
234
00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:17,485
I wonder...
235
00:16:18,288 --> 00:16:21,689
Is it possible for a man to be too nice?
236
00:16:24,294 --> 00:16:27,286
Fellows, it's early.
Aren't you gonna shoot another game?
237
00:16:27,364 --> 00:16:31,130
Gosh, Barney, I can't. I got to go home
and straighten up my closet.
238
00:16:31,201 --> 00:16:34,329
Yeah, and this is my night
to polish the silverware.
239
00:16:34,405 --> 00:16:38,273
But, fellows, we always play
on Tuesday nights. What's the idea?
240
00:16:38,409 --> 00:16:40,434
It's our wives' idea.
241
00:16:40,511 --> 00:16:44,572
There's some joker around
the neighborhood making it tough for us.
242
00:16:44,848 --> 00:16:47,510
Some guy named Frederick.
243
00:16:49,353 --> 00:16:53,289
That reminds me.
This is the night I vacuum the house.
244
00:16:55,426 --> 00:16:58,589
And what would your pleasure be tonight,
my dear?
245
00:16:59,129 --> 00:17:01,689
Getting dressed up, going out to dance...
246
00:17:01,765 --> 00:17:06,168
and hoop it up a bit with other people,
and come home on the milk truck.
247
00:17:07,571 --> 00:17:09,368
You're joking, my dear.
248
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,307
- That wouldn't be elevating.
- No?
249
00:17:12,776 --> 00:17:14,744
Lt'd give me a lift, buster.
250
00:17:14,812 --> 00:17:16,939
I know you can't be serious.
251
00:17:17,181 --> 00:17:19,172
How about a spelling bee?
252
00:17:19,616 --> 00:17:21,743
How about soaking your head?
253
00:17:21,852 --> 00:17:25,288
Then how about reading Shelley's sonnets
to you again?
254
00:17:25,989 --> 00:17:30,892
I've heard Ode to a Lark so many times
I could build a nest and lay eggs.
255
00:17:31,028 --> 00:17:34,361
Then we'll have a little opera music.
256
00:17:34,665 --> 00:17:35,689
Oh, no.
257
00:17:35,766 --> 00:17:38,735
Wait till you hear this one, my dear.
It's different.
258
00:17:38,802 --> 00:17:42,829
- And what's different about it?
- This one has just the music...
259
00:17:43,073 --> 00:17:46,600
which allows me to sing the aria.
How about that?
260
00:17:47,511 --> 00:17:51,174
Oh, no, I hate this one.
The pizzicatos are too andante.
261
00:17:51,248 --> 00:17:55,309
True. But the tonal counterpoint
is so pianissimo.
262
00:17:55,986 --> 00:17:57,385
Oh, brother.
263
00:18:04,495 --> 00:18:06,053
I hate opera.
264
00:18:25,249 --> 00:18:27,979
The orchestra is definitely out of tune.
265
00:18:28,051 --> 00:18:30,246
Shall we try it again?
266
00:18:30,487 --> 00:18:32,785
Once more and I'll blow my top.
267
00:19:04,855 --> 00:19:07,756
Some poor mastodon
is caught in the tar pit.
268
00:19:08,125 --> 00:19:12,186
Yeah, they get caught in the tar,
and they gradually sink.
269
00:19:12,529 --> 00:19:15,464
They ought to put a fence
around the tar pit.
270
00:19:16,199 --> 00:19:19,396
That's not a mastodon. It's Fred singing.
271
00:19:20,170 --> 00:19:22,764
They ought to put a fence around him.
272
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:24,605
Poor Wilma.
273
00:19:25,108 --> 00:19:28,373
Looks like we're in for
a siege of opera this week.
274
00:19:29,279 --> 00:19:33,943
I bet she'd settle for the spelling bees.
At least they don't hurt your ears.
275
00:19:34,851 --> 00:19:38,685
Opera or spelling bees,
either way, we get stung.
276
00:19:41,458 --> 00:19:45,394
I say, you are in a pensive mood tonight,
my dear.
277
00:19:45,796 --> 00:19:47,525
What are you doing?
278
00:19:48,165 --> 00:19:51,362
Just looking at some old photos
of you, Frederick.
279
00:19:53,203 --> 00:19:54,534
How quaint.
280
00:19:54,671 --> 00:19:57,196
That's the old, crude me.
281
00:19:57,641 --> 00:19:59,541
Yes, it is.
282
00:20:00,978 --> 00:20:03,503
That's you at the Rubbles'
New Year's party.
283
00:20:03,647 --> 00:20:05,979
You put on Mrs. Stonehead's hat.
284
00:20:07,484 --> 00:20:09,475
You were a riot. Remember?
285
00:20:10,487 --> 00:20:12,114
I'd rather forget.
286
00:20:13,023 --> 00:20:16,322
And here's you
when you won that pie eating contest.
287
00:20:16,393 --> 00:20:20,295
Disgusting. That was my uncouth period.
288
00:20:20,631 --> 00:20:23,566
How did you ever stand me, Wilma?
289
00:20:23,834 --> 00:20:27,326
It wasn't too hard. It was kind of fun.
290
00:20:31,141 --> 00:20:34,941
You can't go bowling and not ask Fred.
I mean Frederick.
291
00:20:35,245 --> 00:20:37,543
I can give it a good, hard try.
292
00:20:37,614 --> 00:20:40,082
All right, you've tried.
Now go over and ask him.
293
00:20:40,150 --> 00:20:41,378
Okay.
294
00:20:45,989 --> 00:20:49,789
Bowling? I say, that sounds
simply monotonous.
295
00:20:50,060 --> 00:20:53,860
I just thought I'd ask.
After all, you are the team captain.
296
00:20:54,698 --> 00:20:59,067
Yes. Well, a captain
should never let his followers down.
297
00:20:59,803 --> 00:21:03,170
Lead on, old boy.
I shall respond to your plea.
298
00:21:03,707 --> 00:21:04,969
Big deal.
299
00:21:06,710 --> 00:21:10,771
Fellows, look who's here.
It's good old Fred. Where you been, pal?
300
00:21:11,014 --> 00:21:13,642
- Hiya, Fred.
- Yeah, long time no see.
301
00:21:13,717 --> 00:21:16,584
Come on, Captain, it's your turn to bowl.
302
00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:20,520
Please, you are wrinkling my fur.
303
00:21:22,726 --> 00:21:24,626
Guys. Did you get that?
304
00:21:25,095 --> 00:21:27,996
"You are wrinkling my fur."
305
00:21:30,033 --> 00:21:32,729
Good old Fred. There's no one like him.
306
00:21:32,803 --> 00:21:35,931
- They can say that again.
- Gentlemen, please.
307
00:21:36,373 --> 00:21:38,898
I only came because I'm the captain.
308
00:21:39,342 --> 00:21:43,938
And I want it strictly understood
that I shall stand for no insubordination.
309
00:21:45,315 --> 00:21:48,478
No insubordination. What a guy!
310
00:21:48,652 --> 00:21:50,142
Okay, Captain.
311
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:53,148
Get up there and make a strike.
312
00:21:54,291 --> 00:21:57,624
This is a real pro in action.
313
00:22:12,709 --> 00:22:16,201
It went into the gutter.
What happened, Fred?
314
00:22:16,613 --> 00:22:20,549
Never mind that Fred stuff.
My name is Frederick.
315
00:22:23,453 --> 00:22:27,116
They've been looking for Frederick.
I'd better get him out of here.
316
00:22:28,792 --> 00:22:31,818
But I'm their captain! This is mutiny.
317
00:22:31,895 --> 00:22:34,693
And if they catch us,
it'll be worse than that.
318
00:22:34,765 --> 00:22:37,359
Come on, maybe we can beat them home.
319
00:22:39,803 --> 00:22:43,762
Now stay there and don't move
till I tell you to come out.
320
00:22:44,274 --> 00:22:45,866
Barney, what's going on?
321
00:22:45,942 --> 00:22:48,069
Why have you got Frederick
under the bed?
322
00:22:48,145 --> 00:22:50,875
Because I'm saving his life, that's why.
323
00:22:51,715 --> 00:22:55,344
Now remember,
don't come out from under there.
324
00:22:58,555 --> 00:23:01,991
I'm telling you, Wilma,
every guy in town is out to get him.
325
00:23:02,058 --> 00:23:05,516
They even formed
a Get-rid-of-Frederick-or-else club.
326
00:23:05,595 --> 00:23:09,292
- Poor Fred. We got to do something.
- But what?
327
00:23:09,666 --> 00:23:12,829
Maybe we can sell the house
and move out of town.
328
00:23:12,936 --> 00:23:15,666
A rap on the head changed him...
329
00:23:15,739 --> 00:23:19,072
maybe another crack on the noggin
will change him back.
330
00:23:19,142 --> 00:23:21,542
At this point, I'll try anything.
331
00:23:21,678 --> 00:23:25,910
- Go ahead, Barney, conk him.
- Who me? No, not me.
332
00:23:26,016 --> 00:23:28,746
- I couldn't hit him.
- You hit him, Betty.
333
00:23:29,019 --> 00:23:31,112
I can't even spank our dog.
334
00:23:31,555 --> 00:23:33,546
I can't do it either.
335
00:23:34,090 --> 00:23:37,389
- What'll we do?
- Say, I got an idea.
336
00:23:37,761 --> 00:23:40,286
We can arrange it so he conks himself.
337
00:23:40,363 --> 00:23:42,923
- How, Barney?
- Come on, I'll show you.
338
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:45,761
Now, you see that rock up there?
339
00:23:45,836 --> 00:23:48,532
Yes, but why is it on top of the door?
340
00:23:48,872 --> 00:23:50,032
Watch.
341
00:23:52,542 --> 00:23:55,067
Get it? When Fred opens the door...
342
00:23:56,379 --> 00:23:58,870
The rock lands right on his noggin.
343
00:23:59,015 --> 00:24:00,880
I suppose it has to be done...
344
00:24:00,951 --> 00:24:04,045
but is it necessary
to use such a hard rock?
345
00:24:04,221 --> 00:24:07,213
Frederick has a hard head, you know.
346
00:24:07,724 --> 00:24:11,160
Okay, go ahead. But I can't watch.
347
00:24:12,229 --> 00:24:14,697
- Frederick.
- Yes, Bernard?
348
00:24:14,865 --> 00:24:18,494
Will you come out here
and play some opera records for us?
349
00:24:18,668 --> 00:24:22,035
Play some opera records?
Why, certainly, Bernard.
350
00:24:23,273 --> 00:24:26,504
I'm glad your plebeian tastes
are getting elevated.
351
00:24:26,943 --> 00:24:30,344
I think I shall start with a sextet
from Lucia.
352
00:24:35,252 --> 00:24:37,948
Okay, okay!
353
00:24:38,521 --> 00:24:40,386
Who's the wise guy?
354
00:24:41,024 --> 00:24:44,016
I thought I told you
we were through, Rubble.
355
00:24:44,527 --> 00:24:46,427
And what's this stuff, Wilma?
356
00:24:46,496 --> 00:24:49,056
Back, send it back!
357
00:24:49,132 --> 00:24:51,259
You think I'm made of money?
358
00:24:51,668 --> 00:24:54,831
Barney, aren't we supposed
to go bowling tonight?
359
00:24:54,905 --> 00:24:56,395
What are we waiting for?
360
00:24:56,473 --> 00:24:59,806
The fellows need me.
I'm the captain of the team, you know.
361
00:24:59,876 --> 00:25:01,741
Right, Fred. Let's go.
362
00:25:04,981 --> 00:25:08,473
There he goes with all his faults.
363
00:25:09,085 --> 00:25:12,953
- He's still my Fred.
- And that's my Barney.
364
00:25:13,223 --> 00:25:15,657
And we're stuck with both of them.
365
00:25:15,759 --> 00:25:18,250
But we like it. We like it.
366
00:26:01,538 --> 00:26:02,698
Wilma!
367
00:26:08,278 --> 00:26:10,712
Come on, Wilma, open this door!
28957
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