All language subtitles for Afterlife s01e04 Misdirection.eng

(ORGAN VERSION OF
JERUSALEM PLAYING ON RADIO)

Ellen.

Ellen!

Um, yes, it's Alison Mundy. Thanks
very much for calling back so soon.

No problem. Have you
worked for the NHS before?

Yes, I was an NHS nurse.

Yes, I was...

(HANGS UP)

Hello? Hello?

Damn.

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello, um, Mrs Caverhill, I'm sorry
I don't know what happened there.

Who is Mrs Caverhill?

- Is that Robert?
- How are you?

Erm... I'm fine, I'm
actually in the middle of...

I'm just calling about our meeting
on Tuesday, about the book?

Oh. Are we going to call
each other tossers again?

You called me a tosser.
I didn't call you anything.

Well, actually, do you know
what, I don't know if it is all right,

because I might have a
job interview coming up.

All right, well, Wednesday,
then. I'll come to you.

I said, I don't know. Do you
mind if we leave it at that?

Now, look, do you
mind clearing the line

'cause I'm expecting a call
any minute and it's important?

Yeah, but, put it in the diary.

Robert, you just don't get it do you? I've
had enough of this life, this shit life.

These voices in my
head are choking me. I

need to do something.
I need some normality.

Yeah, but what about my book? I mean,
are you committed to that still, because...

Yes, of course I am.
But, you know I'm not

just the subject of your
book, Robert. I'm me.

Well, I'll hang up,
then. Good luck.

Thank you, bye.

ALISON: I was in intensive
care for three years,

and then I spent five
years working in A&E.

- And what brought you to Bristol, Alison?
- A new place, new start.

New life.

- In what way?
- Every way.

I see there's a gap in your
work record here, six months.

Yes, I had an
accident, a serious one.

So I was in and out of
hospital myself for six months,

recuperating.

- But you're fully recovered now?
- Absolutely.

Good.

Hmm... Well, I can
safely say, looking at this,

we'd be delighted to have you.

Erm, it's a three-week holiday
relief placement to begin with,

but between you and me,
our staff situation is fluid,

so if all goes well, we may be able
to look at something more long-term.

So, welcome aboard.

ROBERT: (VOICEOVER)
Possibly Alison, subconsciously,

like other self-proclaimed
psychics before her,

may be continuing to act out to
reward her investigator's interest.

So, the question arises,

is it right to continue
knowing that studying her

might be exacerbating
and prolonging her delusion?

- Worked in one of these places before?
- No, just hospitals.

- A little change of pace for you then?
- Do you like it here?

Pays the bills. Er, TV room.

This is the dining room.

They're cramming some
more rooms into the attic.

It's a lot of noise and dust
and a headache for us.

We have some
wanderers who like to go up

there when we're not
looking. For example...

Cicely, this is
Alison, our new carer.

Hello.

Wanderer. Come on, I'll
show you who else is who.

This is Mrs Havers' room, Nora.

Well, it seems a lot nicer here
than any hospital I've worked in.

Don't let the soft furnishings fool
you. It's just a hospital with carpet.

Only difference here is
that no one goes back home.

This is Jenny's room.

There's no one here.

Another wanderer, I know where
she'll be. I won't be a minute.

Oh, no. Oh, Josh.

Oh, God.

You've got to put your coat on when you
go outside, Jenny, you'll catch a chill.

- This is my room?
- Of course, Jenny. This is Alison.

She's in my room
and that's my picture.

Don't worry, Jenny,
Alison's our new nurse.

- I was looking at your grandson.
- I haven't got a grandson.

- I'm sorry...
- This is my son.

This is Robert.

Lovely soldiers you do.

- Oh? I do them for my grandsons.
- All right, let's get your socks on.

I can do that. I can't bend, but I've got
a thingy on a stick. Or, I had a thingy.

- Someone's taken it.
- Cicely. Hang on.

Oh, not again. Woman's
a bloody magpie.

- They never come you know.
- Sorry?

- His grandsons.
- That's sad.

No, that's normal.

This place is a garage
where nice people park

their parents and tell
themselves they're happy.

Will you check the day room,
see if you can see Cicely?

- Yeah.
- I'm just gonna check up here.

- She's a bit of a klepto, then?
- Only if it isn't nailed down.

(LOUD THUMPING)

Cicely.

Cicely?

(WIND HOWLING)

(FAST ROCK MUSIC
PLAYING ON HEADPHONES)

(ALARM RINGING)

Oh, shit.

ROBERT: You're
looking well, Mum.

Have you seen my dog?

No.

He's an Airedale, he runs off.

- Spike's dead, Mum.
- What?

- Has there been an accident?
- He died when I was six.

Nonsense, he was just here.

He must be in the garden.

He's probably outside
playing with my son.

(LOUD THUMPING)

(LOUD ROCK MUSIC
PLAYING ON HEADPHONES)

(THUMPING CONTINUES)

Can't hear you.

Jesus.

(INAUDIBLE)

- What do you want?
- I'm not taking your job, am I?

'Cause people aren't
usually this hostile

toward me till they get
to know me a lot better.

Sorry, you just gave
me a jolt, that's all.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

- You'll help me finish up here?
- Yeah, sure.

She's hurting.

Her back's crumbling. She
takes Vicodin for the pain.

It's not that sort of
pain. She wants to go.

Start thinking like that,
this job'll do your head in.

I just meant...

I've been looking after
Ellen for five years now.

Ellen? Who's Ellen?

Nora. Mrs Havers.

Look, would you finish up here,
I've got a cracking headache.

I want to go get some aspirin.

- Coffee?
- Yes, please.

Those aspirins that
you went outside to take.

Yeah?

- What were they? Valium, Librium, Xanax?
- Ativan.

- I get stressed.
- They weren't yours though, were they?

Weren't they?

So what is it? A patient dies and you
pocket what's left of their prescription?

What, so you've been
here two days, and

you're gonna tell
teacher on me, is that it?

- Do you do it much?
- Much? No, just enough.

- Who's Ellen?
- Jenny needs her insulin.

Do you wanna do it after
you've finished your coffee?

Sure. Do you want to pretend
that I didn't just ask you about Ellen?

Ellen was a patient.

She was this...

valiant, tough person.

Hobbled around on a
stick. Loved everything,

apart from her
dentures, she hated them.

She was very rude about them.

She especially loved
Poppy, her daughter.

The sun rose and set with
her. She was about your age.

She was hit by a police
car on a pedestrian crossing.

Killed her?

All the stuffing
went out of Ellen.

Three years wanting to die.

- You can't mend a broken heart.
- No, but you can survive it.

Which is worse.

- Settling in all right?
- Yeah.

It's like riding a bike.

JENNY: (VOICEOVER) My son came
to see me yesterday. I'm so proud of him.

What he's become. With
his work, with his books.

So clever, such a clever man.

I know.

- What do you know?
- Nothing.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

You forgot our appointment.

Erm, would like a cup of coffee? I'm
useless until I've had a cup of coffee.

I'd like to get started,
I'm running a bit late.

Okey-doke. I've
got things to do, too.

We've discussed the
trauma of the train crash.

I'd like to hear a little bit about
your earlier experiences of the spirits.

So aren't you going to ask me
how my job hunting is going?

- Sorry. How did it go?
- I've got a job.

Good.

At Lychgate.

And now you're going to tell
me you've seen my mother.

Right. Alison...

let me tell you something...

I know our relationship is psychologist
and subject, not doctor-patient.

But there are similarities and there's this
thing called transference which means...

Like when the patient falls in love
with the psychiatrist, that kind of thing.

- Yeah, exactly.
- Don't flatter yourself.

I know what transference
is and this isn't it.

I didn't get a job there
deliberately. It wasn't...

There are other
nursing homes in Bristol.

- Would you like me to give up my job?
- Yes, actually.

Well, no, actually. I won't.

Why should I? I can't.

She... She said that
she was proud of you.

Of your writing, of
what you've achieved.

Alison, my mother hasn't even
recognised me for two years.

She still thinks I'm five years old.
She looks at me like I'm a stranger.

Well, she said...

No, she didn't. Listen to
me, Alison, it's Alzheimer's.

The body stays healthy and
the brain decays. It's not death.

It's worse than death.
It's a living death.

Then maybe that's the
part of her that I'm hearing.

- Robert, Josh wanted me to work there...
- Stop right there.

Not only do you claim to be in
contact with my dead son but...

now you're contacting my dead mother,
who, just in case you hadn't noticed,

isn't even dead.

See, this is what
deluded people do, Alison.

They have feelings in their head and they
fit it into their pre-existing mindset.

Which is what you do
for a living all the time.

I thought that you wanted to
understand what happens to me

or is that only when it
doesn't affect your own life?

So, same time next week, then?

(DOOR BANGING SHUT)

(THUMPING)

That bloody woman. She's
just ran off with my shoes.

I saw her, chased her.

- Where did she go?
- Up into the bloody attic.

She knows I can't do stairs.

Cicely!

Cicely, this is out of bounds
here. You might hurt yourself.

Come on.

(CREAKING)

Cicely?

Cicely, open the door.

Cicely?

Hello! I'm in the attic!

Hello!

No, please no.

I'm sorry.

Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Please.

What the hell is going on?

- I saw somebody go in there.
- But there's no one there now.

- It was Cicely.
- What?

She just ran past me. She must have
doubled back and locked Connor in.

Yeah.

Bag of nerves. Never used to be.

You need to calm down.

- Did you tell her where your mother was?
- I didn't even tell her I had a mother.

Come on, I know about keeping a
sanitary cordon between author and subject.

Well, let's apply the rational
eye, she lives in the area.

There aren't that many
nursing jobs around

there. It's not a wild
statistical coincidence.

She's not saying it's a
coincidence. She's saying it's Josh.

- What?
- She says she sees Josh.

- Where do you live?
- Southville.

You'll freeze to death waiting for
the bus. Come on, I'll give you a lift.

Oh, thanks.

Thanks for not grassing
me up to suit boy.

- Right.
- I'm not a druggie.

Jude's moved on, and that's
great and probably healthy and...

I know the stats on how
often couples with an

only child don't survive
an early, you know...

Yup.

And of course,

Jude moving on doesn't mean I
feel left behind or anything but...

I do.

Here I am, just here.

The House of Pain.

- The House of Pain.
- Not a good place.

- No. And she...
- She, Jude?

She, Alison, keeps talking
about Josh and that...

Stops you moving on.

I still have his Lego.

Bags of the stuff, his
skateboard, the Disney

videos. I mean, I've
even got his parka.

I don't know why I've
still got his bloody parka.

See, I...

I had this beautiful
perfect thing, this...

little person, it was
my job to take care of.

And I took my eye off the ball
for one minute and now I have...

What do I have?

You're a good friend,
Barb, but I'm buggered.

We're all buggered.

- That's why talking helps.
- Does it?

You remember what Freud
said about the talking cure?

He said its purpose was
to change hysterical misery

into ordinary human unhappiness.

Ordinary human unhappiness?

Sounds good to me.

- Was that Ellen in the attic?
- Ellen's dead.

I know, was that
her in the attic?

- Are you on drugs?
- We both know what we saw, Connor.

It's not a gift exactly, because gifts are
meant to be nice, but sometimes I see...

She's gone, okay?

She's in spirit, Connor,
but she's not gone.

Look, I don't want to
be rude, but I've gotta go.

No, you don't.

She wanted to die. She
asked me to help, I said no.

And you think that you
should have helped her?

She said it would be a kindness to help
her onto the next stage of her journey.

She said that a
lot, just like that.

She wore this Saint
Christopher round her neck.

She wanted me to have
it, I mean, not like a bribe,

but because he was the
patron saint of travellers...

and her journey
would be over if...

Euthanasia.

Ellen meant the Saint
Christopher thing kindly.

But it felt like 30
pieces of silver.

She wanted me to...

help her go to sleep, in
her own bed, in peace...

surrounded by her
own things, and just...

drift off happily. With
no pain, with dignity.

- And did you help her, in the end?
- No.

I bottled it.

She did it herself.

Five months ago.

Went out the window of her flat.

It wasn't peaceful,
wasn't dignified.

Wasn't a high enough window.

When I got there, she
was like some broken doll.

Dress all rucked up, bone sticking
out of her leg, underwear showing,

blood and piss everywhere,
screaming, just screaming in pain.

It didn't stop until the
paramedics got a line in.

It took her six
more weeks to die

in some strange hospital
bed where no one knew her.

I failed her.

Is that why she's hurting you?

I didn't sign up to
be a nurse of death, I

signed up to help people
and to care for them.

- You do care. Maybe you care too much.
- Can you care too much?

Well, I don't know. You're
the one hoarding barbiturates.

You think I'm going to change my mind
about the "nurse of death" thing? Relax.

I'm not talking about euthanasia,
Connor. I'm talking about self-destruction.

Christ, what are you, the psychic
Samaritan? I'm not suicidal!

I got rid of the drugs, I flushed them
away after you caught me, all right?

Are you sure? Because I've
got a friend, he's a psychologist,

he can set you up with
someone to talk to if...

It was making me imagine things.

- There was someone there, Connor.
- No.

I've gotta go.

Okay, see you tomorrow.

Just get this straight, Jenny,

and then would you like a
bath or we could go for a walk?

JENNY: (VOICEOVER)
That was Josh's fifth birthday.

That was a lovely day.

Robert made us laugh so much.

Every year he'd
learn a magic trick.

Every year a new one.
He'd practise it and practise it.

Just to see Josh's face.

Josh misses those magic tricks.

(FAST ROCK MUSIC
PLAYING ON HEADPHONES)

(PAGER BEEPING)

Quick.

(PHONE RINGING)

- Robert, it's me.
- Jude?

Everything's okay, your
mother's fine, but she's had a fall.

I'm at Lychgate.

- I was running when you called. Is Mum...
- She just slipped.

We've checked her over,
and there's nothing broken.

- Excuse me.
- Thanks, Alison.

Bye-bye.

Jude, I'll be back in a minute.

Alison, what were you doing in
there? That's my wife, my ex-wife.

Because if you were even
thinking of telling her about Josh...

Oh my God, what
do you think I am?

Josh doesn't need to get to
Jude, he needs to get to you.

I'm not this person that goes up to
people with an emotional machine gun.

What gives you the right to make these
kind of judgements about me, Robert?

Just because you've
got, what? Qualifications.

This is unacceptable.
It's unacceptable.

I have to tell you these
things because of Josh.

Don't you think that I can see what it
does to you every time I mention his name?

And don't you think that
that makes me feel like shit?

But I'm stuck between
a rock and a hard place.

Between this little boy,
this lost boy and you.

And sometimes it makes me...

I'm sorry for getting
upset. I'm sorry, Robert.

I can't even touch her any more.

She stiffens, like I'm a
stranger, molesting her.

Sometimes, she lets me touch
her when I give her her insulin,

but it's only because she thinks I'm
some strange doctor or something.

It's some sort of contact, I suppose.
I should make the most of it while...

- Thank you.
- What's this?

Just because Josh died doesn't mean
I'm not grateful for the happiness we had.

Ellen.

(BUBBLING)

Stop it.

Please stop it.

What do you want with me?

- Where did you put them, Cicely?
- Put what?

The pills, out of the staff room.
The ones in the cutlery drawer.

I didn't.

You take everything,
Cicely. Where are they?

I didn't.

Where do you
hide things, Cicely?

Oh, brilliant.

Now, who's got a coin? Anybody?

Okay, hold them out like this.

We're going to find
the magic one, okay?

No, not this one.
Not these I'm afraid.

Let's have a look.
No, not these.

Okay, magic coin
definitely. May I?

And you know what
magic coins do?

They disappear.
You're not impressed?

It's a bit lame that one.
It's still in your other hand.

Of course, it is.

Okay, you know what happened?

You knew I'd palmed the coin
because it's the oldest trick in the book.

Plus, I told you what to know.

I told you I was gonna
make it disappear.

I made you misread
the situation.

- So, guess what I found?
- The coin?

No, again, you
answered too quickly.

You should've
taken the time, I did.

See, you were thinking coin
trick, but I was thinking con-trick.

You thought this was the point
at which the trick took place.

So you stopped thinking further back
than that. Which is natural because...

And this is the bit we
take down in our notes.

We are designed
to think forwards.

The human brain is
an anticipation machine.

Knowing that is the key to
understanding misdirection.

Don't take yourself
down the wrong path.

We have to unpick
our assumptions of the

facts to the point we've
really been deceived.

(PAGER BEEPING)

Alison, thank you
for coming in early.

- Connor's gone AWOL.
- AWOL?

He was here, now he isn't.
He left without telling anyone.

Mr Keyhoe had an accident.

(BANGING)

- And what's that?
- What?

Banging.

There's no banging. The
workmen aren't here today.

Connor?

(BANGING CONTINUES)

Connor!

Connor?

Connor?

Connor?

Connor!

- I'm sorry.
- Ellen stop.

Ellen, stop it.

Connor?

Connor...

Connor...

I don't think that Ellen
means to hurt you.

It's all right,
Connor, it's all right.

- She's gone.
- It's okay, Connor.

Look...

this is where Cicely
hides her stash.

That's why Ellen was banging.

She wanted you to
come up here and find it.

"Dearest Connor, don't be sad.

"As you will see, I've
gone under my own steam.

"I will be with Poppy
as you read this.

"I'm sorry I tried to make you
act against your convictions.

"You were my last and
possibly my best friend.

"Forgive me. Ellen."

She died in so much pain.

But she's at peace
now. She's gone.

You have her
blessing. It's done.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Hi, Mum.

Are you the new doctor?

Would you mind if I
sat with you for a while?

We were just about to
have our jab, weren't we?

Could I do it, please?

It's all right.

Thank you.

I'll hold your hand.

You used to do magic
tricks for Josh, didn't you?

She told me that you'd
learn a new one every year.

She says that Josh
is missing them.

Jenny, let's get
your cardigan on?

They, erm...

They offered me a permanent
job here, but I turned them down.

- Because of me?
- No.

There's too many voices
here, too many souls.

I'm sorry.