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They say every coin has two sides.
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I totally agree.
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On one side you get a job in the best and delicious restaurant in town,
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but on the other side it doesnt improve the quality of your own food
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On one side you are respected guests of an elite restaurant,
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but on the other side
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you will never find out what they really think about you
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On one side,
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you think that you are in the most beautiful and peaceful place on earth
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On the other hand...
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Veal Palantine with capers!
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Yes chef!
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Tarragon trout, two orders !
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Senya, where's my bechamel?
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Right away, Chef. 20 seconds!
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Why are you standing here?
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And finally,
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on one side you’re two hours late
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and you think they’re going to crucify you
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but on the other hand…
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Chicken-butt, I love you!
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He was late. I win.
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Everyone who bet, fork it over.
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Hurry, hurry!
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Because you improved my mood in this hideous day,
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I’m rewarding you with a very important, and socially useful task:
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you will...
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unload the groceries.
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Chef, but...
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And don’t thank me, it’s from my heart.
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Chef, I thought I was going to cook.
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Look, you credited yourself two non-existent abilities
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thinking and cooking.
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Fast!
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Nastya, one day i will get a heart attack because of you.
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Chef, what’s the right word for a female head chef?
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Chefina?
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A freak of nature.
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Well then, the freak of nature from the neighboring restaurant
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is sitting in the dining hall.
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What’s she sniffing around here for?
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Do you me to ask her?
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No need.
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What did she order?
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Coffee.
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and that’s it?
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What are we, a coffee house?
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Chef, are you afraid of her?
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Yeah right. Why?
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My shoelaces were simply untied
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What, they didn’t fire you yesterday?
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Well, first of all, good afternoon.
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Second, smoking is bad for your health.
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Third, who would fire such a specialist?
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Wait!
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Were you really upset that I might leave?
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Are you going to miss me?
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In memory of our wonderful night!
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Hi, Aunur.
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Listen, you.
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If anyone finds out here that something happened between us,
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I’ll…
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Viktoria Sergeevna!
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Yes Kostya.
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Viktoria Sergeevna,
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the C-Keeper in the bar got broken again.
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I told you yesterday that you need to call the repairman.
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Now you’ll have to fix the problem yourself.
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So, the C-keeper got broken?
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Yes.
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Do you know how they work?
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What’s to know...
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In my last job,
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my C-keeper got broken every day
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I left, and don’t know who fixes it now.
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Listen, can you fix mine?
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In return, I’ll unload everything.
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Well, ok.
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So, the unloading problem is solved.
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The only thing left is to find out what a C-Keeper is.
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Good afternoon.
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Hello!
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What brings you here?
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Work.
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They brought luxurious tableware to our restaurant.
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While they’re unloading it,
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I decided to kill a half an hour at your place.
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Yes, good tableware often helps out.
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And why are you not ordering anything?
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Well, I just said I wanted to kill time, and not myself.
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Bad joke, huh?
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Yeah, but never mind.
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Everybody knows there are two things women can’t do
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joke and cook.
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I think that a cup of disgusting coffee
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won’t delay you too long in our horrible restaurant.
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Good bye.
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Perhaps I will order.
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Oh, fricassee partridge.
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Chef’s specialty. How intriguing!
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Sasha, take this ladie's order.
102
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Silly woman...
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Can you imagine?
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Chef?
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She worked in India!
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They can roll there any trash in curry and call it food.
107
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And where’s my knife?
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And what are you doing here?
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You were chosen to unload groceries.
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Everything’s fine there.
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I just need to get to the bar.
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Who took my knife?
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I repeat,
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WHO took MY knife?
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I see...
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Senya,
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come to me.
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Senya, my dear, was it you who took my knife?
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No.
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Then WHO?!!
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Well then, retards,
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until you find my knife, none of you can go home
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Understood?
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Chef, I got an order for partridge fricassee.
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And I won’t cook anything until they find my knife!
126
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So, everybody is looking for the knife!
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F-Fast!
128
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Listen, what’s the problem?
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Lets buy him the same knife quickly...
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Buy it?
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Do you have any idea about this knife?
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Japan.
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Did you understand now?
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There is no way we can buy same knife quickly.
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Why did you freeze?
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Come on! Start looking for the knife!
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And what does this blasted C-Keeper look like?
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Oh, wow, that’s a C-Keeper?
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I thought it was a cash register.
140
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Kostya, two espressos, please.
141
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Eeyore, what are you doing there?
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I’m the new bartender.
143
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They fired Kostya because he doesn’t know shit.
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Dont mess with me.
145
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I saw you in the kitchen. You’re a cook.
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I have many talents, but in my heart I’m a bartender.
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The bottle was empty, there was no balance.
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What do you want, coffee?
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Yeah, make two espressos please.
150
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Seriously? Bartender...
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Get out. I’ll do it myself.
152
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Maybe you'd like a cup of tea?
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You just asked me that 10 minutes ago.
154
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Well, maybe you already want one.
155
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Would you mind to find out whats going on with my order?
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Sure.
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Well...
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will you do it or not?
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Ah, you want to know right now!
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Ok!
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Amazing. Dont cook.
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Dmitri Vladimirovich will be very pleased to know
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that his favorite chef refuses to cook.
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Enjoy!
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Soon you’ll have a new chef.
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Of course if the old one doesn’t cook this freaking fricassee.
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Let’s cook it ourselves.
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If we cook his specialty, he’ll…we…
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He’ll devour us...
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yes, you’re right. Better not risk it.
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And if we don’t make it, he’ll get fired!
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Exactly, your right, we have to cook it.
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or you are right...
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Damn it! I’m confused.
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It’s...its...its a bad idea....its...
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As our captain used to say,
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“better to shit your pants because of storm,
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than because of a weather forecast”.
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(something in Kyrgyz)
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Is that good...
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or bad?
182
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Is she eating it?
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Of course she’s eating it,
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what else she might be doing?
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Excuse me,
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can you come here for a second?
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Yes...
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Please call your chef...
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(something in Kyrgyz), she said something to Sasha.
190
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Maybe she asked for seconds!
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The guest…
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the guest is asking for the chef!
193
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I w-w-warned you.
194
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You jinxed it!
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Go to Chef’s office.
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I dont have anything to do with it!
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Go! Go!
198
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No, I was against it from the beginning.
199
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Fedya made the whole thing up, let him go
200
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Why me???
201
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Go! Go!
202
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Leva, you go! You're his right hand.
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He won’t sacrifice his right hand.
204
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Go! Go!
205
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N-n-nooo...I-I’m n-not g-going!
206
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Let Luis go.
207
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He has nothing to lose, he’s anyway...
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a Frenchman.
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Listen – let’s write Chef an SMS.
210
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Yeah, we’ll write to him our r-r-resignation letter very soon.
211
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Please, dont jinx it again!
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Don’t panic!
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Chef!
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Chef!
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Whats now?
216
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That attractive woman....
217
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from the future neighboring restaurant is calling you.
218
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You know…the one that you like.
219
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:23,440
Aunura, stop talking nonsense. I don’t like anybody.
220
00:11:25,140 --> 00:11:26,300
Hasn’t she left yet?
221
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:30,860
How may I help you?
222
00:11:31,220 --> 00:11:33,160
I tried your fricassee.
223
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Well, how did you like it?
224
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Do you want me to tell you the truth?
225
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You know, I liked it.
226
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Yeah, it’s a good recipe.
227
00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:48,260
Yeah, it’s not really a recipe.
228
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There was a partridge left over and we didn’t want to throw it away.
229
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Oh.... I see.
230
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Well, it is nice....
231
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to leave your place still in good health.
232
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What? you’re leaving already?
233
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How unfortunate! Can you imagine? I have absolutely no time left.
234
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Your chef’s specialty took too long to prepare.
235
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Good bye!
236
00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:25,820
It was not enough just to steal my knife....
237
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you also ruined my specialty.
238
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Everyone, come out!
239
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Chef,
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we...h-ha-had...
241
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We had only good intentions, Chef!
242
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I don’t give a damn what your intentions were.
243
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Do you know what she said about your fricassee?
244
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That its disgusting!
245
00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:52,840
Chef – that’s exactly what I told them!
246
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The chef’s speciality – disgusting!
247
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Ah, you...
248
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Retards!
249
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Kostya, did you fix the C-Keeper?
250
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:13,660
No, but I'm working on it.
251
00:13:14,620 --> 00:13:15,780
What are you doing here?
252
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Fixing the C-Keeper.
253
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:19,140
What? Get out from the bar!
254
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Get out, I said!
255
00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:23,120
Artyom, call Kostya quickly.
256
00:13:23,380 --> 00:13:25,260
Why are you standing there? Get out!
257
00:13:25,260 --> 00:13:25,840
Out!
258
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:27,080
Ok, ok. What’s wrong with you?
259
00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:48,460
Yes, Vicktoria Sergeevna?
260
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:49,460
Kostya,
261
00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:51,540
is this normal?
262
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:54,540
Why is there a mess and outsiders in the bar?
263
00:13:54,540 --> 00:13:58,040
Well ...uhh...it’s just that…he was fixing the C-Keeper.
264
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Mmm...Yeah?
265
00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,620
Well... then where’s the cognac?
266
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I don’t know.
267
00:14:13,220 --> 00:14:14,660
Well than who knows?
268
00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:16,660
Kostya, should I fire you?
269
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It was here, I saw it.
270
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What a bastard!
271
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Excuse me, I’ll be right back.
272
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Listen – where’s the cognac?
273
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What cognac?
274
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:47,540
The 20,000 ruble cognac.
275
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,360
20,000? Oh wow!
276
00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,560
You are in trouble, dude!
277
00:14:51,660 --> 00:14:53,520
You are the one who is in trouble, dude!
278
00:14:54,820 --> 00:14:56,740
Listen you, bull, you’re looking for problems
279
00:14:56,740 --> 00:14:58,720
Have you heard that the bigger wardrobe falls harder ?
280
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:00,780
Baby boy, Im gonna kick your ass so badly!
281
00:15:00,780 --> 00:15:02,700
Do you know how many years I’ve been boxing?
282
00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:12,060
Oh, God, I’m so fed up with all this!
283
00:15:12,060 --> 00:15:14,980
Why does everything always have to go up the ass?
284
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:18,220
Why cannot at least one day go smoothly?
285
00:15:18,220 --> 00:15:19,920
One day, my God!
286
00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:28,480
Spartak is on the opponent's penalty box.
287
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:30,080
CSK keeps defense
288
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,920
Aries gets the ball... he shoots...
289
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:33,900
And goal!!!
290
00:15:46,180 --> 00:15:48,040
Its a little bit awkward...
291
00:15:50,020 --> 00:15:51,940
Are you deaf? I haven’t seen your cognac!
292
00:15:51,940 --> 00:15:54,500
Here...the bottle was right here, on this place.
293
00:15:56,980 --> 00:15:58,260
Surprise!
294
00:15:58,620 --> 00:16:00,680
Your luck that i didnt expect the blow,
295
00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:02,260
otherwise I would have kicked your ass for sure.
296
00:16:02,260 --> 00:16:03,540
I don’t understand anything.
297
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,800
Listen, Kostya, I fixed your C-Keeper by the way.
298
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:15,200
Listen, man...Im sorry, ah?
299
00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:17,340
And what should I do with your "Sorry"?
300
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,520
You owe me one, a big one.
301
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:22,060
What are you looking at?
302
00:16:22,060 --> 00:16:24,440
Make me something fresh. I feel dizzy.
303
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:25,680
Right away.
304
00:16:28,020 --> 00:16:30,020
So what should I do now, Arkady?
305
00:16:30,620 --> 00:16:33,860
I can’t go out like this as if nothing had happened.
306
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:36,300
Or can I?
307
00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:40,160
Hide it somewhere?
308
00:16:45,060 --> 00:16:47,320
What are you waiting for, lazy bums?
309
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,360
Have you found the knife?
310
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:07,960
Lyova, come to my office.
311
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,080
Yes chef.
312
00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:18,720
What?
313
00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:22,460
What? What the hell?
314
00:17:22,859 --> 00:17:24,159
Did you loose your mind?
315
00:17:24,165 --> 00:17:25,619
Why did you take it?! He’ll....
316
00:17:25,619 --> 00:17:26,599
slaughter you!
317
00:17:26,599 --> 00:17:28,479
I didn’t take it. It was inside the fish.
318
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,400
Listen, let sleeping dog lie,
319
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,360
hide it somewhere and let the chef find it.
320
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:49,700
Hey, idiot, why did you leave this dirty basket here?
321
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,300
Take it away, quickly!
322
00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:52,540
Idiot!
323
00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:54,740
Lyova, have you found the knife?
324
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:56,040
Not yet Chef.
325
00:17:56,040 --> 00:17:57,460
Did you look everywhere?
326
00:17:58,040 --> 00:17:59,140
Everywhere.
327
00:17:59,140 --> 00:18:00,480
Look better then!
328
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:04,900
Well, maybe someone cut something and left the knife there, well...
329
00:18:04,900 --> 00:18:06,520
for example, in a fish.
330
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:08,720
In a fish?
331
00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:10,753
Well, in some meat.
332
00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:13,920
How do I know where? Look everywhere!!!
333
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:14,860
Yes chef.
334
00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:27,540
(something in Kyrgyz)
335
00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:28,980
Hide this knife!
336
00:18:28,980 --> 00:18:31,900
If the Chef sees it, he’ll circumcise you.
337
00:18:31,900 --> 00:18:34,840
It’s better if he finds it himself. Hide it! Hide it!
338
00:19:09,700 --> 00:19:11,180
So, have you found it?
339
00:19:11,180 --> 00:19:13,900
Chef, we looked eeevvverywhere, and we coudnt find it.
340
00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:16,340
There was a fish here. Where is it?
341
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:18,340
They took it to the dining hall.
342
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:21,620
Chef, they are calling you there ...
343
00:19:21,620 --> 00:19:23,760
there... they found a knife inside a fish.
344
00:19:25,700 --> 00:19:27,400
So what? It happens.
345
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,160
Once we found a monkey inside a shark.
346
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:31,160
Alive.
347
00:19:34,460 --> 00:19:37,000
Ahh, I have to do something....
348
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,300
in two days i screwed up twice...
349
00:19:39,300 --> 00:19:40,540
They’ll fire me for sure.
350
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:45,540
Good evening.
351
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:46,380
Good evening.
352
00:19:46,380 --> 00:19:47,740
I’m the head chef of this restaurant.
353
00:19:47,740 --> 00:19:49,320
They told me you wanted to see me.
354
00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:52,200
Yes I did. Can you explain to me what is this?
355
00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:54,320
Please, allow me, Chef.
356
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:54,960
What?
357
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:57,700
I will tell the guests what you once told me.
358
00:19:58,060 --> 00:19:58,560
Good evening.
359
00:19:58,680 --> 00:19:59,180
Good evening.
360
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:03,000
In front of you is a unique dish with more than a thousand years of history.
361
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,900
So lets go back to the time of the Crusades.
362
00:20:05,900 --> 00:20:08,480
War. Hunger. The year 1107.
363
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:13,260
Godfrey of Bouillon crosses the Bosporus and invents a unique way of cooking fish
364
00:20:13,260 --> 00:20:16,400
by placing it on the blade of the sword.
365
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:21,400
The evenly heated blade gives the fish a refined taste and aroma.
366
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:21,980
Try it.
367
00:20:26,780 --> 00:20:27,960
Yes, really.
368
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:29,260
Thats exactly what I was telling you.
369
00:20:29,260 --> 00:20:31,360
It’s real poetry of cooking.
370
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:33,360
Chef, did I miss anything?
371
00:20:33,360 --> 00:20:35,620
No, everything is right.
372
00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:38,860
Excuse me, may i have the same fish?
373
00:20:38,860 --> 00:20:40,852
Certainly. Max, lets go.
374
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:42,180
Enjoy your meal.
375
00:20:42,180 --> 00:20:42,840
Thank you.
376
00:20:45,340 --> 00:20:47,780
Chef, you called me by name.
377
00:20:47,820 --> 00:20:49,340
Oh yeah, sorry...
378
00:20:49,340 --> 00:20:53,520
Chicken-butt, if you go out to the dining hall without my permission again,
379
00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:54,480
I’ll fire you.
380
00:20:55,220 --> 00:20:55,980
Got it.
381
00:20:55,980 --> 00:20:58,380
Make sure that this knife will not disappear.
382
00:21:11,940 --> 00:21:13,140
I warned you.
383
00:21:13,780 --> 00:21:15,920
That’s it, i cant talk now. I cant, I told you.
384
00:21:16,220 --> 00:21:17,540
Dima, what happened?
385
00:21:17,540 --> 00:21:18,940
Vika, are you leaving?
386
00:21:18,940 --> 00:21:21,140
Yes, Vika, whats going on?
387
00:21:21,140 --> 00:21:22,406
Dmitri Vladimirovich,
388
00:21:22,406 --> 00:21:25,420
God only knows what’s going on in this restaurant.
389
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:29,820
As a woman, I can’t oppose Victor Petrovich
390
00:21:29,820 --> 00:21:31,980
and he indulges all violations.
391
00:21:31,980 --> 00:21:35,220
Yes. I told you I can’t now. Ok.
392
00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:38,600
I beg you, I have to go, so Vika, keep it short please.
393
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:39,140
Yes, ok.
394
00:21:39,780 --> 00:21:43,380
Yesterday Maxim Lavrov started to work as a cook in the kitchen.
395
00:21:44,120 --> 00:21:45,500
I want him fired.
396
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:47,520
Here we go... and why? Is he a complete idiot?
397
00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:48,020
Yes.
398
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,000
Today he messed up the bar.
399
00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:51,770
Smashed a bottle of liquor,
400
00:21:51,770 --> 00:21:53,400
broke glasses and the coffee machine.
401
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:54,080
Kostya,
402
00:21:54,580 --> 00:21:55,480
is that true?
403
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:57,900
Sorry, sorry, actually it's my fault.
404
00:21:57,900 --> 00:22:00,500
I asked Max to fix the C-Keeper.
405
00:22:01,180 --> 00:22:02,620
and by the way he did it.
406
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:05,700
And the coffee machine is working,
407
00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:08,140
and the bottle was ... almost empty.
408
00:22:08,140 --> 00:22:09,420
Well, thanks God, guys,
409
00:22:09,420 --> 00:22:10,720
the C-Keeper is working. I love...
410
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,180
just love happy endings like this.
411
00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:14,680
So, everything’s fine and I can leave…
412
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:15,792
No, not everything.
413
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:18,600
He also approached some guests in the dining hall... I think...
414
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:21,063
I asked him to do that. We presented a new dish.
415
00:22:21,063 --> 00:22:22,500
In general, he’s a good guy.
416
00:22:22,500 --> 00:22:23,200
Smart.
417
00:22:23,980 --> 00:22:25,120
A normal guy.
418
00:22:25,120 --> 00:22:27,940
And when he’s not smiling his face isn’t too goofy.
419
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:30,580
Is there anything else, Vika?
420
00:22:30,580 --> 00:22:31,080
Yes.
421
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:33,100
Today he also started a fight.
422
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:34,680
Really?!
423
00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:37,440
I don’t like fights in our restaurant.
424
00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:38,180
Is it true?
425
00:22:38,420 --> 00:22:40,040
Yeah, we were just fooling around…
426
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:41,080
Fooling around?
427
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:44,400
Fooling around…Just a second, I filmed the whole thing.
428
00:22:44,980 --> 00:22:49,620
-Here.
-Thanks to Vika, who films everything in her life.
429
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:53,040
Max, are you filming? Stop it.
430
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:58,280
Sh-h-h…We haven’t finished watching it yet.
431
00:22:58,280 --> 00:23:01,520
Yeah. We find it interesting.
So let us finish it.
432
00:23:03,100 --> 00:23:05,420
I like it... I love these kinds of movies.
433
00:23:05,420 --> 00:23:07,040
Arms, legs, screams...
434
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,220
Well, what kind of fight is this?
435
00:23:09,220 --> 00:23:11,980
It’s not a fight – you aren’t even resisting.
436
00:23:12,140 --> 00:23:13,940
So for now there’s no reason to fire him.
437
00:23:13,940 --> 00:23:14,971
Thank you very much.
438
00:23:14,980 --> 00:23:18,540
I hope that you won’t bother me with this kind of things anymore.
439
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:19,140
Yes,
440
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:20,948
I say goodbye to you.
441
00:23:20,948 --> 00:23:22,000
Not to you, idiot.
442
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:24,080
Why are you whining? Yes, I hear you.
443
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:26,520
Yes, yes.Tell me.
444
00:23:30,420 --> 00:23:32,620
Now listen, idiots...
445
00:23:32,620 --> 00:23:34,560
no one else should know about this.
446
00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:36,080
Vika, of course, is a bitch,
447
00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:38,000
but she is not the worst restaurant manager.
448
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,600
She still has to work here. Did you understand?
449
00:23:42,660 --> 00:23:43,980
There you have it.
450
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:47,020
Every coin has two sides,
451
00:23:47,020 --> 00:23:49,260
and one day everything can turn around.
452
00:23:50,540 --> 00:23:53,660
The one you liked starts to hate you.
453
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:04,520
The one who hit you in the face becomes your friend.
454
00:24:05,860 --> 00:24:08,040
And the one who seemed like a wicked tyrant...
455
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:10,360
begins to look less like one.
456
00:24:10,360 --> 00:24:13,360
"Happy birthday, Vitija! Daddy"
29685
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