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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,661 --> 00:00:08,297 ♪ Hey, good morning, baby ♪ 2 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:11,175 ♪ You need some java, baby? ♪ 3 00:00:11,828 --> 00:00:14,142 ♪ We got to wake up, baby ♪ 4 00:00:14,175 --> 00:00:16,681 ♪ Last night was really crazy ♪ 5 00:00:16,706 --> 00:00:18,826 ♪ I think I liked it, baby ♪ 6 00:00:18,851 --> 00:00:20,789 ♪ Damn, you smooth, baby ♪ 7 00:00:20,822 --> 00:00:24,462 ♪ Looking like you moisturize, baby ♪ 8 00:00:24,495 --> 00:00:27,068 ♪ Tell me where to buy it, baby ♪ 9 00:00:27,101 --> 00:00:28,638 ♪ I'm dry, I need the product, baby ♪ 10 00:00:29,699 --> 00:00:31,402 ♪ Got my hand on navel ♪ 11 00:00:31,427 --> 00:00:34,267 ♪ Then she slid her panties to the ankle ♪ 12 00:00:34,292 --> 00:00:36,531 ♪ Made me back up and look at the bussy ♪ 13 00:00:36,654 --> 00:00:38,423 ♪ Bussy glistening like a heavyweight ♪ 14 00:00:39,739 --> 00:00:41,931 ♪ You want to fuck me, baby? ♪ 15 00:00:41,956 --> 00:00:44,143 ♪ Haven't showered in a minute, girl ♪ 16 00:00:44,168 --> 00:00:46,406 ♪ But if you with it, then I'm with it, baby ♪ 17 00:00:46,439 --> 00:00:49,312 ♪ I will shower you with every curl ♪ 18 00:00:49,345 --> 00:00:51,584 ♪ Are you freaky, baby? ♪ 19 00:00:51,617 --> 00:00:53,655 ♪ Spooning me like I was soup ♪ 20 00:00:53,688 --> 00:00:56,526 ♪ Want me to be dirty like a goose? ♪ 21 00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:59,600 ♪ Ooh, but what do you like, baby? ♪ 22 00:00:59,633 --> 00:01:02,305 ♪ Do you want me to choke you, baby? ♪ 23 00:01:02,338 --> 00:01:04,342 ♪ She said, "That's okay, baby" ♪ 24 00:01:04,375 --> 00:01:06,513 ♪ "That's okay" as in you want that? ♪ 25 00:01:06,547 --> 00:01:10,120 ♪ Or "That's okay" as in "No, thanks, baby"? ♪ 26 00:01:10,154 --> 00:01:12,224 ♪ She look at me crazy ♪ 27 00:01:12,258 --> 00:01:14,295 ♪ I said, I don't mean to complicate it, no, no ♪ 28 00:01:14,329 --> 00:01:16,366 ♪ Let me grab a condom, baby ♪ 29 00:01:16,399 --> 00:01:18,905 ♪ I put it on, then she, then she ♪ 30 00:01:18,938 --> 00:01:21,577 ♪ Throws it back, give me the ass, pop it ♪ 31 00:01:21,610 --> 00:01:24,282 ♪ Tickle the breast, nibble the crack, stop it ♪ 32 00:01:24,315 --> 00:01:26,252 ♪ General Custer, with the tactics, I'm a demon ♪ 33 00:01:26,286 --> 00:01:29,760 ♪ I could feel the semen creeping 'round the penis ♪ 34 00:01:29,793 --> 00:01:31,731 ♪ Being a man in there ♪ 35 00:01:31,764 --> 00:01:34,803 ♪ We need a ambulance, pussy getting killed ♪ 36 00:01:34,837 --> 00:01:37,776 ♪ She orgasming, body spasming ♪ 37 00:01:37,809 --> 00:01:41,884 ♪ Then I finally finish, can you feel it, baby? ♪ 38 00:01:41,917 --> 00:01:43,755 ♪ Sliding off, where's the condom? ♪ 39 00:01:43,788 --> 00:01:46,694 ♪ Whoa! Well, it's not on my penis, baby ♪ 40 00:01:46,727 --> 00:01:49,332 ♪ It's so confusing, baby ♪ 41 00:01:49,365 --> 00:01:51,737 ♪ Uh, did I-did I just fuck you raw, baby? ♪ 42 00:01:51,771 --> 00:01:53,775 ♪ Uh, I'm looking round and I don't see it, baby ♪ 43 00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:55,344 ♪ I move the blanket, move the covers ♪ 44 00:01:55,377 --> 00:01:56,813 ♪ Where's the rubber, baby? ♪ 45 00:01:56,838 --> 00:01:59,334 ♪ Now she's digging like a caveman in her bussy for it ♪ 46 00:01:59,359 --> 00:02:01,642 ♪ Even if you find it in there, what's the difference, baby? ♪ 47 00:02:01,666 --> 00:02:04,137 ♪ Semen probably already leaking in there, swimming in you ♪ 48 00:02:04,162 --> 00:02:05,574 ♪ She says she still don't want no condoms ♪ 49 00:02:05,598 --> 00:02:06,801 ♪ Sitting in her insides ♪ 50 00:02:06,834 --> 00:02:07,812 ♪ I said I understand ♪ 51 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:09,360 ♪ But there are bigger fish to fry ♪ 52 00:02:09,385 --> 00:02:10,695 ♪ She said, "You blaming me" ♪ 53 00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:11,998 ♪ "But you're the one who put it on" ♪ 54 00:02:12,022 --> 00:02:14,459 ♪ I am not blaming you, and I don't think I put it on wrong ♪ 55 00:02:14,484 --> 00:02:16,931 ♪ I put it on my pinky first to see which way it go ♪ 56 00:02:16,956 --> 00:02:19,308 ♪ Because I'm well aware that condoms aren't reversible ♪ 57 00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:20,653 ♪ She screamed, "I found it, baby!" ♪ 58 00:02:20,677 --> 00:02:22,005 ♪ She pulled it out her bussy ♪ 59 00:02:22,030 --> 00:02:23,267 ♪ But I can't celebrate it ♪ 60 00:02:23,292 --> 00:02:24,371 ♪ 'Cause we got bigger fishy ♪ 61 00:02:24,395 --> 00:02:25,832 ♪ Girl, I ejaculated ♪ 62 00:02:25,857 --> 00:02:27,126 ♪ And I don't see it in there ♪ 63 00:02:27,151 --> 00:02:27,974 ♪ She said it's fine ♪ 64 00:02:28,025 --> 00:02:30,122 ♪ She'll just take the morning-after pill ♪ 65 00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:32,686 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 66 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,522 ♪ Thank God for the tech now ♪ 67 00:02:34,556 --> 00:02:37,294 ♪ We should probably go and get it now ♪ 68 00:02:37,328 --> 00:02:40,668 ♪ This is life when you're young and wild. ♪ 69 00:02:40,702 --> 00:02:42,873 Don't worry, it'll be fine. 70 00:02:42,906 --> 00:02:46,547 Okay. Let's lie down after all that. 71 00:02:46,580 --> 00:02:48,718 Ah. Take the load off. 72 00:02:48,751 --> 00:02:51,322 Get in here. 73 00:02:51,356 --> 00:02:53,393 Oh. 74 00:02:54,339 --> 00:02:55,965 - Wow. - Okay. 75 00:02:55,999 --> 00:02:58,236 I fucked Lil Dicky. 76 00:03:19,546 --> 00:03:21,650 I promise you, bro. You cannot get a STD 77 00:03:21,684 --> 00:03:24,111 going in the pussy raw for only ten seconds. 78 00:03:24,136 --> 00:03:25,244 Who says it was ten seconds? 79 00:03:25,268 --> 00:03:26,782 It could've been ten, it could've been 48. 80 00:03:26,806 --> 00:03:28,940 I have no idea. I fucked the condom off my dick 81 00:03:28,965 --> 00:03:30,575 trying to give her this, like, rock star style sex 82 00:03:30,599 --> 00:03:32,267 that I assume she wants out of me. 83 00:03:32,292 --> 00:03:33,948 You are a rock star. This your first tour. 84 00:03:33,973 --> 00:03:35,019 You're supposed to go hard. 85 00:03:35,043 --> 00:03:36,681 That's the whole issue, in my opinion. 86 00:03:36,706 --> 00:03:39,144 I feel like all of these girls just want to fuck Lil Dicky. 87 00:03:39,169 --> 00:03:41,541 Is it really a crime to want someone who wants 88 00:03:41,566 --> 00:03:43,688 to fall in love with... 89 00:03:43,761 --> 00:03:45,473 - the real Dave? - Bro, you got to think about her needs. 90 00:03:45,497 --> 00:03:47,282 She got her nails done, she got her outfit. 91 00:03:47,307 --> 00:03:48,506 She told all her friends. 92 00:03:48,531 --> 00:03:49,883 It's gonna be the highlight of her year. 93 00:03:49,907 --> 00:03:51,777 You got to beat the pussy up, bro. 94 00:03:51,811 --> 00:03:53,815 But I don't even... I don't fuck like this. 95 00:03:53,848 --> 00:03:55,350 That's not how I fuck, Gata, okay? 96 00:03:55,384 --> 00:03:57,933 I-I do this. It's more... It's rhythmic. 97 00:03:57,958 --> 00:03:59,735 Man, that shit look complicated, man. 98 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:02,364 Complicated? It's so simple. It's missionary. 99 00:04:08,109 --> 00:04:09,989 Hi. 100 00:04:12,619 --> 00:04:14,890 You're just gonna bust those open, bruh? 101 00:04:14,923 --> 00:04:16,570 - You ain't gonna pay for them first? - I'm gonna pay for 'em. 102 00:04:16,594 --> 00:04:18,931 Just chill out. 103 00:04:27,414 --> 00:04:30,755 Y'all find everything okay? 104 00:04:31,757 --> 00:04:34,997 Yeah. Oh. 105 00:04:35,030 --> 00:04:36,767 I'm sorry. 106 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:40,742 You guys have condoms here? 107 00:04:41,455 --> 00:04:42,790 It's the same condoms everywhere. 108 00:04:42,815 --> 00:04:43,824 Why don't they make, like, 109 00:04:43,848 --> 00:04:45,552 smaller condoms for the smaller dicks? 110 00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:48,227 Like, they make Magnums for, like, big-dicked men. 111 00:04:48,252 --> 00:04:49,836 I feel like the condom would stay on the dick easier 112 00:04:49,860 --> 00:04:51,462 if it was smaller sometimes. 113 00:04:51,496 --> 00:04:52,875 If you're that concerned about STDs, 114 00:04:52,899 --> 00:04:54,174 why don't you just use the Scroguard, bro, 115 00:04:54,198 --> 00:04:55,928 that Mike got you... That plastic diaper shit? 116 00:04:55,952 --> 00:04:58,391 Uh, that's private business. Don't talk about it. 117 00:04:58,758 --> 00:05:01,295 I don't know what he's talking about, but he's not dangerous. 118 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:04,488 - You crazy, man. - They know I'm joking. 119 00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:06,560 Man, they got the Confederate flag in there, bro. 120 00:05:06,584 --> 00:05:08,216 It's the Texas flag. 121 00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:11,510 Looked pretty Confederate to me, man. Hey, Cliff. 122 00:05:11,897 --> 00:05:13,019 I got the goods. 123 00:05:13,044 --> 00:05:14,357 - Ooh. - Pistachios, but I can't... 124 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,845 - For you. - Merci. 125 00:05:15,879 --> 00:05:17,916 - They break my teeth, man. - For you. - Thank you. 126 00:05:17,949 --> 00:05:19,996 - You want to smoke this? - All right, man. It's hot. 127 00:05:20,020 --> 00:05:22,524 Uh, I'll take a hit, I guess. 128 00:05:23,326 --> 00:05:26,466 You just wet m y fucking blunt. You're fucking nasty. 129 00:05:26,499 --> 00:05:27,836 I'm gonna get some color. 130 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:29,269 Racist. 131 00:05:29,294 --> 00:05:31,331 No disrespect. 132 00:05:50,748 --> 00:05:52,418 Trying to burn off the bacteria? 133 00:05:52,451 --> 00:05:54,723 I'm just not built for this. 134 00:05:54,756 --> 00:05:57,394 I can't be, like, the rapper who goes around 135 00:05:57,436 --> 00:05:59,841 and fucks every night. That's not my thing. 136 00:05:59,866 --> 00:06:01,870 But I'm trying to rewire my brain 137 00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:03,432 so I can actually have fun for once. 138 00:06:03,457 --> 00:06:04,986 You've been stressed. You've been working so hard. 139 00:06:05,010 --> 00:06:06,880 I know. And tour is just the one time in life 140 00:06:06,914 --> 00:06:09,192 - where there's no album to hand in. - Yup. 141 00:06:09,217 --> 00:06:11,657 There's no songs to make. I can just be free 142 00:06:11,690 --> 00:06:13,526 - and live life to the F. - Yup. 143 00:06:13,561 --> 00:06:15,674 It's exactly like the time I was up in the air. It was one 144 00:06:15,698 --> 00:06:17,661 - of those moments... - This has nothing to do with skydiving. 145 00:06:17,685 --> 00:06:19,230 This has everything to do with skydiving, David. 146 00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:20,450 - Nothing to do... - No, when you're 147 00:06:20,474 --> 00:06:21,442 hurtling toward the earth 148 00:06:21,476 --> 00:06:22,246 at 120 miles an hour, 149 00:06:22,271 --> 00:06:23,791 you're reaching max veloce, it's incredible. 150 00:06:23,815 --> 00:06:25,257 And the chute doesn't open, you start to freak out, 151 00:06:25,281 --> 00:06:27,457 but that's when you learn. You learn, David. 152 00:06:27,482 --> 00:06:28,908 -When the instructor kisses you -Mm. 153 00:06:28,933 --> 00:06:31,997 On the small of your neck, and he says, "I'm sorry!," 154 00:06:32,031 --> 00:06:35,003 that's when you learn to let go. 155 00:06:35,037 --> 00:06:38,744 I desperately crave a genuine romantic connection. 156 00:06:38,778 --> 00:06:41,449 Like, I need to fall in love. That's just who I am. 157 00:06:41,482 --> 00:06:44,723 - Well, maybe you shouldn't hook up with your fans anymore. - Okay. 158 00:06:44,756 --> 00:06:46,235 Maybe you shouldn't... We don't need this 159 00:06:46,259 --> 00:06:47,805 - for the documentary, okay? - Yeah, we do. 160 00:06:47,829 --> 00:06:50,768 Don't tell me what to do with my documentary. 161 00:06:50,802 --> 00:06:52,471 Uh, I don't want this footage, Emma. 162 00:06:52,504 --> 00:06:53,617 You don't know what you're gonna use. 163 00:06:53,641 --> 00:06:54,543 Get different stuff. 164 00:07:08,532 --> 00:07:11,565 - I can't listen to this another time. - It's exhilarating. 165 00:07:11,590 --> 00:07:12,874 But what I'm saying is when you're plummeting towards 166 00:07:12,898 --> 00:07:14,387 -the earth at terminal velocity, -EMMA: God, I get it. 167 00:07:14,411 --> 00:07:16,448 The earth feels like it's gonna swallow you whole. 168 00:07:16,473 --> 00:07:18,532 It's so scary, dude, but you live. 169 00:07:18,557 --> 00:07:20,695 I love this story. He's still telling the story, huh? 170 00:07:20,728 --> 00:07:22,073 - Yeah. - Hey, LD, what's them islands 171 00:07:22,097 --> 00:07:23,668 we going to on this tour? 172 00:07:23,701 --> 00:07:25,538 Uh, I don't know the specifics, but... 173 00:07:25,571 --> 00:07:27,942 We going to the Specifics, y'all. 174 00:07:27,976 --> 00:07:29,610 - Specifics. - Huh. Um... 175 00:07:29,635 --> 00:07:31,550 - Are you performing tonight? - Oh, no. 176 00:07:31,583 --> 00:07:33,587 Tonight's all about my sweet baby G right here. 177 00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:35,734 - Gata's night, baby. - Big dog's night. - Hey, Lubbock, Texas 178 00:07:35,758 --> 00:07:37,605 - ain't ready for a nigga like me. - They're not. 179 00:07:37,629 --> 00:07:39,241 They never were. They never were a day. They never will be. 180 00:07:39,265 --> 00:07:40,944 - That's what I do. - Uh, that's what you've been doing. 181 00:07:40,968 --> 00:07:43,808 Big G! - Gata. 182 00:07:43,841 --> 00:07:45,611 Aw, LD, do one song with me, bro. 183 00:07:45,645 --> 00:07:47,615 No, thank you. 184 00:07:47,649 --> 00:07:49,853 It's my one night off. Come on. I-I'm trying 185 00:07:49,886 --> 00:07:51,566 - to blend into the background, be a normal guy. - Yeah. 186 00:07:51,590 --> 00:07:52,835 It's hard to meet your wife when you're onstage 187 00:07:52,859 --> 00:07:54,629 - being the star. - Well, some people say 188 00:07:54,663 --> 00:07:56,141 - that's the easiest way to meet your wife. - Aw. 189 00:07:56,165 --> 00:07:58,045 You're with him every day? How do you resist him? 190 00:07:58,069 --> 00:08:00,775 - Are you serious? - Look, 191 00:08:00,808 --> 00:08:02,253 I just want to know if everyone's all in 192 00:08:02,277 --> 00:08:03,857 to have the best night they can possibly have. 193 00:08:03,881 --> 00:08:05,159 'Cause I need that type of comradery... 194 00:08:08,791 --> 00:08:10,928 ♪ Too many women, I got too many women ♪ 195 00:08:10,962 --> 00:08:13,834 ♪ Man, my biggest problem, I got too many women ♪ 196 00:08:13,868 --> 00:08:16,740 ♪ Damn, my head's spinning, I got too many women ♪ 197 00:08:16,774 --> 00:08:18,778 ♪ Am I living in sin and I see too many women ♪ 198 00:08:18,811 --> 00:08:22,251 ♪ I'm married to the money, but I'm in love with my women ♪ 199 00:08:22,284 --> 00:08:25,057 ♪ Dark-skinned, light-skinned, Puerto Rican, Asian ♪ 200 00:08:25,090 --> 00:08:27,595 ♪ Sorry, Mama, but your son is crazy ♪ 201 00:08:27,629 --> 00:08:30,000 ♪ I'm-a get it together if they pay me. ♪ 202 00:08:30,033 --> 00:08:32,806 Yeah. 203 00:08:32,839 --> 00:08:34,609 Yeah! 204 00:08:34,643 --> 00:08:36,756 Dicky! Dicky! 205 00:08:36,780 --> 00:08:40,755 - Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! - Oh, no, no, no. Gata. 206 00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:43,894 - Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! - Gata. Gata. 207 00:08:43,928 --> 00:08:45,550 - Dicky. Dicky. - Thanks. 208 00:08:45,575 --> 00:08:47,346 Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. 209 00:08:47,371 --> 00:08:49,782 I appreciate the love y'all got for my boy Dicky, man. 210 00:08:49,806 --> 00:08:51,963 I've been trying to get him out here on this stage tonight, 211 00:08:51,987 --> 00:08:54,292 but he on some Carmen Sandiego type shit. 212 00:08:54,415 --> 00:08:56,653 Let's see if we can get him on stage right now! 213 00:08:58,707 --> 00:09:01,379 LD! LD! LD! 214 00:09:01,409 --> 00:09:03,809 LD! LD! 215 00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:07,909 LD! LD! LD! LD! 216 00:09:15,009 --> 00:09:17,681 ♪ I'm drunk, I'm drunk ♪ 217 00:09:17,706 --> 00:09:21,947 ♪ I'm really, really drunk ♪ 218 00:09:22,010 --> 00:09:24,281 ♪ I'm drunk ♪ 219 00:09:24,306 --> 00:09:27,312 ♪ I'm really, really wasted ♪ 220 00:09:27,337 --> 00:09:30,143 ♪ Man, I'm so fucked-up ♪ 221 00:09:30,168 --> 00:09:32,674 ♪ I might suck a man's dick, no, I'm playing, ha-ha. ♪ 222 00:09:41,977 --> 00:09:45,350 What's your deal right now? Why are you so lethargic? 223 00:09:48,687 --> 00:09:50,393 You just got sucked. 224 00:09:50,427 --> 00:09:52,999 Sloppy toppy, bro. 225 00:09:53,032 --> 00:09:54,636 Who sucked you? 226 00:09:54,669 --> 00:09:56,339 - I had to, man. You... - Where? 227 00:09:58,009 --> 00:10:00,418 What does this... Whatever, I don't care. 228 00:10:00,443 --> 00:10:02,660 Let's have fun tonight. Do you want a drink? 229 00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:05,958 Honestly, bro, I'm exhausted as fuck, bro. 230 00:10:05,992 --> 00:10:07,838 - I'm about to go lay down, dawg. - You're leaving? 231 00:10:07,862 --> 00:10:09,833 - Yeah, man. Yeah. - What about my night off? 232 00:10:09,866 --> 00:10:11,937 What about the plan that-that you committed to? 233 00:10:11,970 --> 00:10:13,874 - Man, I'm going, gone. - Gata. 234 00:10:13,908 --> 00:10:15,878 - You never honor the plan, man. - Hey, text me 235 00:10:15,912 --> 00:10:17,080 when you get to the hotel. 236 00:10:23,246 --> 00:10:25,685 - Hi. - Hi. 237 00:10:25,710 --> 00:10:27,669 - Is this a good time? - Yeah. 238 00:10:27,702 --> 00:10:30,040 Great, 'cause I made something for you. 239 00:10:30,073 --> 00:10:31,944 - Oh, okay. - Um... 240 00:10:32,786 --> 00:10:33,907 Oh, my God. 241 00:10:33,932 --> 00:10:35,234 It's you. 242 00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:36,854 - Oh, that's me? - Yeah. 243 00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:38,858 Oh, wow. It's so heavy. 244 00:10:38,891 --> 00:10:40,695 It's concrete, that's why. 245 00:10:40,728 --> 00:10:41,698 It's, like, sharp, too. 246 00:10:41,723 --> 00:10:43,709 - I'm kind of nervous. - Don't be nervous. 247 00:10:43,734 --> 00:10:45,046 This is great. You're doing great. 248 00:10:45,070 --> 00:10:47,174 - Hey. Oh. - Oh. 249 00:10:47,207 --> 00:10:50,013 I appreciate this so much, okay? 250 00:10:50,046 --> 00:10:51,750 I'm such a big fan of yours. 251 00:10:51,783 --> 00:10:53,486 - Thank you. - Um, I love Penith so much, 252 00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:55,299 and I'm really trying to break into the industry, so... 253 00:10:55,323 --> 00:10:57,094 - Yeah. - Ah, here I am. 254 00:10:57,127 --> 00:10:59,064 Well, let me tell you firsthand, 255 00:10:59,098 --> 00:11:02,037 things are surprisingly possible in life, okay? Go for it. 256 00:11:02,070 --> 00:11:03,707 Wow. 257 00:11:03,741 --> 00:11:05,043 - Yeah. - Thank you. 258 00:11:05,076 --> 00:11:06,801 - Sure. - Lil Dicky, I love you. 259 00:11:06,826 --> 00:11:08,563 I love you, too, okay? Be safe. 260 00:11:19,505 --> 00:11:22,010 - I never knew that. - Yeah. All right. 261 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,224 Fuck. Oh, shit. 262 00:11:32,304 --> 00:11:34,776 You doing all right? 263 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,172 What? 264 00:11:36,205 --> 00:11:39,345 Are you doing all right? 265 00:11:40,347 --> 00:11:43,186 Oh. Yeah. 266 00:11:43,219 --> 00:11:47,227 Just a little statutory, uh, issue I'm taking care of. 267 00:11:47,261 --> 00:11:49,933 Yeah, I'm just cleaning up somebody else's mess. 268 00:11:49,966 --> 00:11:51,302 - Hi. - Hi. 269 00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:53,039 - How you doing? - I'm good. I'm sor... 270 00:11:53,072 --> 00:11:54,909 I don't-I don't know you. 271 00:11:54,943 --> 00:11:56,780 Well, how could you? We're just now meeting. 272 00:11:56,813 --> 00:11:58,526 No, I know, but I know you're, like, a singer or something, 273 00:11:58,550 --> 00:12:00,263 - just here with my friends, but I just... - Oh. 274 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:01,890 I've never heard of you. 275 00:12:02,761 --> 00:12:04,562 Honestly, I prefer that. 276 00:12:04,596 --> 00:12:05,915 Like, great. It's good 277 00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:08,344 that you have a clean slate on my personality. 278 00:12:08,369 --> 00:12:10,808 - Oh. - Yeah, I'm a-I'm a rapper, actually, not a singer. 279 00:12:10,841 --> 00:12:13,246 I do sing, song-write, all that. 280 00:12:13,279 --> 00:12:15,918 Oh, you did that song about being drunk. 281 00:12:15,952 --> 00:12:17,354 What was... what was it called? 282 00:12:17,387 --> 00:12:18,906 - It was... - "I'm Drunk." 283 00:12:18,931 --> 00:12:21,337 Oh, yeah, well, I'm on my way. 284 00:12:21,362 --> 00:12:23,266 You... pig. 285 00:12:24,602 --> 00:12:27,542 I don't know. So, what's your deal... 286 00:12:27,575 --> 00:12:29,258 You just go to live music venues 287 00:12:29,283 --> 00:12:32,125 without even knowing who the person is and you have fun? 288 00:12:32,150 --> 00:12:35,256 Wednesdays are like my Fridays. I'm a nurse, so... 289 00:12:35,290 --> 00:12:37,260 - Ah. A nurse? - Yeah. Had to 290 00:12:37,294 --> 00:12:38,957 come blow off some steam, you know? 291 00:12:38,982 --> 00:12:41,002 I appreciate everything you do, uh, 292 00:12:41,035 --> 00:12:43,540 behind the scenes for all the sick. 293 00:12:43,574 --> 00:12:45,802 - Thank-thank you. - Yeah. But okay, 294 00:12:45,827 --> 00:12:47,964 I can't go any further without knowing your name, 295 00:12:48,116 --> 00:12:49,819 - so... - Oh, it's Campbell. 296 00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:50,873 Campbell? 297 00:12:50,898 --> 00:12:52,257 Yeah, like the soup. 298 00:12:52,290 --> 00:12:54,094 That's a perfect name. 299 00:12:54,119 --> 00:12:55,589 - Thanks? - Campbell, 300 00:12:55,614 --> 00:12:57,885 can I ask you a relatively hard-hitting question? 301 00:12:57,935 --> 00:12:59,171 Yeah. 302 00:12:59,204 --> 00:13:00,507 What's your availability 303 00:13:00,541 --> 00:13:02,411 as far as being hit on right now? 304 00:13:02,444 --> 00:13:04,736 Uh... 305 00:13:04,761 --> 00:13:07,130 Like, would you say you're open-minded, or not at all? 306 00:13:07,154 --> 00:13:09,124 Uh... 307 00:13:09,158 --> 00:13:12,397 Yeah, I think I, uh... I'm... 308 00:13:12,431 --> 00:13:14,569 I'm definitely open to it. 309 00:13:15,390 --> 00:13:17,694 This is fun. 310 00:13:17,742 --> 00:13:20,046 People are actually crazy. 311 00:13:20,071 --> 00:13:22,176 They were literally pouring tequila in their eyes. 312 00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:26,386 Like, why? I wish I had, like, 40 cameras. I keep missing shit. 313 00:13:26,593 --> 00:13:28,864 Just ask them to redo it. 314 00:13:28,897 --> 00:13:31,235 I can't do that for my doc. It's not real. 315 00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:34,976 Real? None of this is real, Emma. Are you crazy? 316 00:13:35,009 --> 00:13:36,989 - What... - We're on tour right now. Tour's not real. 317 00:13:37,013 --> 00:13:39,340 When we come to town, it's like their version of the Super Bowl. 318 00:13:39,364 --> 00:13:42,102 Okay, Mr. Big Shot Who's Been On Tour. 319 00:13:42,127 --> 00:13:44,063 Do you not understand that white people act out 320 00:13:44,088 --> 00:13:45,323 when they see a camera? 321 00:13:45,397 --> 00:13:48,136 - What? - Trust me. Come on. 322 00:13:49,303 --> 00:13:52,010 - Wait... - White boy summer! 323 00:13:52,044 --> 00:13:54,381 - White boy summer! - White boy summer! 324 00:13:56,620 --> 00:13:58,465 Then I'm gonna continue to smoke this joint, then. 325 00:13:58,489 --> 00:14:00,260 - All right. - Oh, hi, man. 326 00:14:00,293 --> 00:14:02,197 LD! 327 00:14:02,230 --> 00:14:03,967 Thank you. 328 00:14:04,001 --> 00:14:05,437 Does that get annoying? 329 00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:07,675 It's just praise. It's... All it is is praise. 330 00:14:07,708 --> 00:14:10,513 - Okay. - But it's the life I chose. 331 00:14:10,548 --> 00:14:12,484 - Yeah. - I always wanted to be ubiquitous. 332 00:14:12,517 --> 00:14:17,263 Well, uh... good luck, and you have a new fan, 333 00:14:17,288 --> 00:14:19,306 and I really hope that you make it. 334 00:14:19,331 --> 00:14:21,368 Get this out of here. 335 00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:22,672 You're saying goodbye? 336 00:14:22,705 --> 00:14:24,274 - Well... - You're not about to leave. 337 00:14:24,308 --> 00:14:26,312 - Uh... - You can't be. You're not gonna 338 00:14:26,345 --> 00:14:27,925 let something like this totally evaporate. 339 00:14:27,949 --> 00:14:29,652 No. No, no, no. I'm engaged. 340 00:14:29,686 --> 00:14:31,422 - Oh, of course you are. - No, no, no. 341 00:14:31,455 --> 00:14:33,192 No, no, no! No, no, like... 342 00:14:33,226 --> 00:14:36,365 Like, I'm engaged in the conversation. 343 00:14:36,398 --> 00:14:37,660 - Oh. - Yeah. 344 00:14:37,685 --> 00:14:39,548 So, a bunch of us are gonna go to my friend Connor's. 345 00:14:39,572 --> 00:14:41,142 He's having a little get-together. 346 00:14:41,175 --> 00:14:42,645 - Oh. - You want to come? 347 00:14:42,678 --> 00:14:45,016 'Cause I like hanging out with you. 348 00:14:45,049 --> 00:14:47,354 I like hanging out with you so much. 349 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,160 - All right. - I do have a tour bus 350 00:14:50,193 --> 00:14:52,565 - parked half a block away. It's so charming. - Oh, no. 351 00:14:52,598 --> 00:14:55,938 I'm-I'm not, like, a groupie. I'm just a regular girl. 352 00:14:55,971 --> 00:14:59,044 Of course you are. I respect that. 353 00:14:59,077 --> 00:15:00,868 - We'll go to... Connor's? - Yeah, Connor. 354 00:15:00,893 --> 00:15:02,360 Okay. I have to grab something off that bus. 355 00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:03,850 - Will you stay here? - Yeah. 356 00:15:03,875 --> 00:15:05,754 Okay, because, in my opinion, I feel as though 357 00:15:05,779 --> 00:15:08,520 this is what life is all about... Moments like this. 358 00:15:09,614 --> 00:15:12,025 We'll figure something out later, but yeah. 359 00:15:12,050 --> 00:15:13,963 - We'll figure it out. We'll work on it. - Okay. All right. 360 00:15:13,987 --> 00:15:16,713 You're getting ready to have a blast, 361 00:15:16,746 --> 00:15:20,427 but you're not sure about someone's sexual past. 362 00:15:20,452 --> 00:15:24,361 Part of the skin of your genital area has a cover, 363 00:15:24,394 --> 00:15:27,334 but most is still exposed to your lover. 364 00:15:27,367 --> 00:15:29,271 Not anymore. 365 00:15:30,708 --> 00:15:33,012 Now there's Scroguard. 366 00:15:33,045 --> 00:15:37,471 The powerful new product that you can wear with any condom. 367 00:15:37,496 --> 00:15:40,293 The secret is the high-quality premium latex 368 00:15:40,326 --> 00:15:43,000 that is thick enough to cover your genital area 369 00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:46,048 but thin enough to feel like a second skin. 370 00:15:46,073 --> 00:15:47,725 Just fasten any two buttons 371 00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:49,612 securely into place, and when you're ready... 372 00:15:49,646 --> 00:15:52,117 Hey, Dave... Oh, shit! 373 00:15:52,150 --> 00:15:55,190 - Oh! - Geez. Uh... No shitting on the bus! 374 00:15:55,223 --> 00:15:56,612 No, I'm not-I'm not shitting! 375 00:15:56,637 --> 00:15:58,441 I'm just fixing my pants. 376 00:15:58,597 --> 00:16:01,468 I changed my underwear 'cause I met a girl 377 00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:03,261 and I was talking to her, and I-I, like, 378 00:16:03,286 --> 00:16:05,290 soaked my first underwear with pre-cum. 379 00:16:05,443 --> 00:16:08,049 - Okay. - I-I met a girl. 380 00:16:08,082 --> 00:16:10,420 Uh, congratulations, man. I'm happy for you. 381 00:16:10,453 --> 00:16:12,621 - Wish me luck. - You deserve love, Dave. 382 00:16:15,947 --> 00:16:19,239 - ♪ Worry about tomorrow... ♪ - ♪ Don't drink and drive ♪ 383 00:16:19,264 --> 00:16:21,874 ♪ Give me that pizza, dawg, give me that pizza ♪ 384 00:16:21,899 --> 00:16:23,246 ♪ You know, I gotta eat ya ♪ 385 00:16:23,279 --> 00:16:25,557 ♪ Uber says my driver's name is Gangi ♪ 386 00:16:25,582 --> 00:16:27,656 ♪ And he said he's hard of hearing ♪ 387 00:16:27,681 --> 00:16:29,267 - ♪ Cool, I don't care... ♪ - CAMPBELL: Sorry. 388 00:16:29,291 --> 00:16:31,438 - No, this is honestly my fault, uh... - Anyway, anyway, okay. 389 00:16:31,462 --> 00:16:33,634 -It was like 3:00 a. m., and we're all, like -Yeah. 390 00:16:33,667 --> 00:16:35,614 - Sure. - Drunk as piss, and all of a sudden, we hear, 391 00:16:35,638 --> 00:16:37,618 like a "bang, bang, bang." Like, Jurassic Park or something. 392 00:16:37,642 --> 00:16:39,474 - It was like... - Oh, my God. What was it... like, a rapist? 393 00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:40,746 No, no. It was actually my goat. 394 00:16:40,771 --> 00:16:42,748 My goat got out of its pen. It was, like, ramming its horns 395 00:16:42,772 --> 00:16:45,365 - against the glass. Ramming... - Wait, hold it. You have a goat? 396 00:16:45,390 --> 00:16:46,769 - Like, you're a goat owner? - Mm-hmm. 397 00:16:46,793 --> 00:16:48,362 Yeah, I got a bunch of goats. 398 00:16:48,396 --> 00:16:50,499 You're, like, out of a fable. 399 00:16:50,524 --> 00:16:52,705 Hey, you're the fucking GOAT, LD. Come on. 400 00:16:52,738 --> 00:16:55,510 - Hey, y'all, shut the fuck up! - Thank you, bro. 401 00:16:55,544 --> 00:16:57,380 Sorry. Don't even look at that. 402 00:16:57,414 --> 00:16:59,384 - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - He's fine. Oh. 403 00:16:59,418 --> 00:17:01,155 Get in here. 404 00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:02,792 Wow, you just broke the touch barrier. 405 00:17:02,825 --> 00:17:04,215 So nonchalantly, 406 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:06,389 you're just gonna break it like that, and not even... Wow. 407 00:17:06,413 --> 00:17:09,058 - I mean, someone had to. - I'm totally on board with it, FYI. 408 00:17:09,083 --> 00:17:11,508 - Um... - Oh, my God. 409 00:17:14,314 --> 00:17:15,851 I have to pee. 410 00:17:16,029 --> 00:17:18,267 Yeah. I understand that. 411 00:17:18,292 --> 00:17:20,402 I've had to pee in the past, and you never know when it's coming. 412 00:17:20,426 --> 00:17:22,574 - Thank you. All right. - Yeah. I'm right there with you. 413 00:17:22,598 --> 00:17:23,660 - Get all the piss out. - All right. 414 00:17:23,684 --> 00:17:25,198 - I'll be right here. I'm great. - Okay. 415 00:17:25,222 --> 00:17:26,425 I'm in heaven. 416 00:17:33,654 --> 00:17:36,492 What's up, man? 417 00:17:36,525 --> 00:17:39,261 Hey. You guys hanging? 418 00:17:39,286 --> 00:17:40,738 - How you doing? - Good. 419 00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:43,540 Hey, man, so... 420 00:17:45,878 --> 00:17:47,682 What? 421 00:17:49,451 --> 00:17:51,422 You like Ram? 422 00:17:51,455 --> 00:17:54,294 R-Ram? Uh, do I like what? 423 00:17:54,328 --> 00:17:56,231 - Uh... - What do you mean? Like the... 424 00:17:56,265 --> 00:17:58,502 - Like the processing power? - It's... 425 00:17:58,537 --> 00:17:59,848 the L. A. Rams. Like, Los Angeles Rams. 426 00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:02,344 - Like, uh, football team. - Oh, shit. 427 00:18:02,377 --> 00:18:04,481 Is he okay, or is he on, like, Oxys or something? 428 00:18:04,514 --> 00:18:07,153 - No, no. I mean... - Is this Appalachia that we're in? 429 00:18:07,178 --> 00:18:09,414 'Cause I know all about the opioid crisis that you probably 430 00:18:09,438 --> 00:18:10,440 have to deal with at every moment. 431 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,573 I've got molly, if you want some. 432 00:18:12,598 --> 00:18:15,704 Oh. No, thanks. 433 00:18:15,738 --> 00:18:18,644 It's, like, dark purple. 434 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:20,488 I'm okay. 435 00:18:20,513 --> 00:18:22,728 I don't even understand the color spectrum of molly, but... 436 00:18:22,752 --> 00:18:25,858 - What's your name? We haven't met. - Grace. 437 00:18:25,891 --> 00:18:30,181 - You... Race? - Hey, are you hiring, by the way, LD? 438 00:18:30,206 --> 00:18:33,506 - No. - Um, I majored in-in golf course management. 439 00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:35,160 - Uh-huh. - Um, but there's a lot 440 00:18:35,185 --> 00:18:37,698 - of crossover between the two. - Yeah, I think 441 00:18:37,723 --> 00:18:39,894 you're better off on the greens there, 'cause, like, 442 00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:43,292 - we're just so fully staffed. - No, yeah, yeah, yeah. 443 00:18:43,325 --> 00:18:44,662 Yeah. 444 00:18:45,486 --> 00:18:46,619 Um, normally, 445 00:18:46,672 --> 00:18:48,746 like, shit's like way more popping, you know? Like... 446 00:18:48,770 --> 00:18:50,249 - No. - It's pretty low-key, 'cause it's Wednesday night 447 00:18:50,273 --> 00:18:52,377 - and shit, and, like... - All good. All G. 448 00:18:52,410 --> 00:18:53,923 But, yo, like, normally, we're playing, like, 449 00:18:53,947 --> 00:18:56,653 Mancala or, like, Cards Against Humanity, 450 00:18:56,686 --> 00:18:58,557 - or, like, fucking... - Sure. 451 00:18:58,590 --> 00:19:00,627 - If you came back, like, on a... - Yeah. 452 00:19:00,661 --> 00:19:03,232 No, don't... No presh, man. I'm, like, just happy to be... 453 00:19:03,265 --> 00:19:05,838 I'm honestly here 'cause of Campbell. 454 00:19:05,871 --> 00:19:07,641 - Bro. - Yeah. 455 00:19:07,675 --> 00:19:10,714 I heard her pussy's a straight-up V. 456 00:19:10,748 --> 00:19:14,789 I... Yeah, I believe you. Um... 457 00:19:14,822 --> 00:19:17,427 Hey, you know what? Fuck it. Hey, Hey, Travis! 458 00:19:17,460 --> 00:19:19,799 Hey, fire that shit up! We're playing Hot Seat, bitch. 459 00:19:19,832 --> 00:19:21,536 What are we doing? 460 00:19:27,748 --> 00:19:29,295 It's a prank phone call-based game? 461 00:19:29,319 --> 00:19:30,563 - Mm-hmm. Shh. - How often do you play it? 462 00:19:30,587 --> 00:19:31,823 All right. All right. 463 00:19:36,566 --> 00:19:37,980 - Hello? - Hey. 464 00:19:38,005 --> 00:19:40,607 I'm... I'm with your brother. 465 00:19:40,641 --> 00:19:43,613 Wait, Tim's with you? He okay? 466 00:19:43,647 --> 00:19:45,984 - He's OD'ing. - Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! 467 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,822 Did you call 911? 468 00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:50,460 Yeah, but they can't... 469 00:19:50,493 --> 00:19:53,567 - Come on. - Revive... Aah! 470 00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:55,446 It's the hot seat! Fuck! 471 00:19:55,470 --> 00:19:56,749 Okay, I'm gonna get another drink. 472 00:19:56,773 --> 00:19:58,477 Where you going? 473 00:19:58,502 --> 00:20:00,757 - I'm getting another drink. - Hurry back. - Hey, LD. 474 00:20:00,781 --> 00:20:02,885 Wait. You probably got all sorts 475 00:20:02,918 --> 00:20:04,354 of celebs and shit in your phone. 476 00:20:04,387 --> 00:20:06,024 Wait. I... 477 00:20:06,058 --> 00:20:07,026 Come on. 478 00:20:07,060 --> 00:20:09,699 Alfonso Ribeiro? 479 00:20:09,732 --> 00:20:11,502 That a pasta? 480 00:20:11,536 --> 00:20:13,716 Carlton? That doesn't mean anything when I say it? Carlton? 481 00:20:13,740 --> 00:20:15,720 All right, all right, all right. LD, come on. It's your turn. 482 00:20:15,744 --> 00:20:17,715 - Oh, no. I'm... - Come on. Get on that hot seat, 483 00:20:17,748 --> 00:20:18,717 - for old times' sake. - You... 484 00:20:18,750 --> 00:20:20,019 Let me watch how you... 485 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,397 - Fuck you. - What are you doing? 486 00:20:21,421 --> 00:20:22,892 - Wow. What? - Okay. 487 00:20:22,925 --> 00:20:25,731 So you're really not gonna kiss me right now? 488 00:20:25,764 --> 00:20:29,839 Why-why would you think that? It's crazy of you. 489 00:20:29,872 --> 00:20:31,317 Campbell, would you come out here? 490 00:20:31,341 --> 00:20:33,713 Your friends are getting a little dicey. 491 00:20:33,747 --> 00:20:35,516 - Oh. - Need you back here. 492 00:20:35,551 --> 00:20:37,520 Fuck. She blew it. 493 00:20:37,555 --> 00:20:40,727 - What do you mean? - I mean, fucking passed out. 494 00:20:40,761 --> 00:20:42,832 - No, she's not. - Yeah. 495 00:20:45,712 --> 00:20:47,808 I'm drunk. 496 00:20:47,842 --> 00:20:50,547 - She's drunk. - Guns up! 497 00:20:50,581 --> 00:20:54,365 - Guns up! - Guns up, motherfuckers! 498 00:20:54,390 --> 00:20:57,295 Aw, that sucks. Her mission was to fuck you tonight. 499 00:20:58,262 --> 00:21:00,601 Wait, what do you mean, you said it was her mission? 500 00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:03,506 - Like, going into the night? - Yeah. 501 00:21:03,540 --> 00:21:05,644 Then why did she tell me when I met her 502 00:21:05,677 --> 00:21:07,480 that she had never heard of Lil Dicky? 503 00:21:07,514 --> 00:21:09,652 Oh, is that what she told you? 504 00:21:10,044 --> 00:21:11,380 She probably just said that 505 00:21:11,405 --> 00:21:12,834 'cause she's watched all your interviews. 506 00:21:12,858 --> 00:21:14,529 She knows that's what you want to hear. 507 00:21:14,562 --> 00:21:18,435 She's a die-hard. I mean, she knew what to tell you. 508 00:21:18,469 --> 00:21:21,441 Okay. I'm-I'm gonna leave. 509 00:21:21,475 --> 00:21:23,947 No, no, no, no, no. No, come on, man. No, no, no. 510 00:21:23,980 --> 00:21:25,459 - Yeah. - LD, no. There's a bunch of people still coming. 511 00:21:25,483 --> 00:21:27,555 This shit's just getting started. 512 00:21:27,588 --> 00:21:29,424 - Come on. - It's so late. We leave tomorrow. 513 00:21:29,457 --> 00:21:32,096 This is literally the best night of my entire life, man. 514 00:21:32,130 --> 00:21:35,336 That's... Really? 515 00:21:36,138 --> 00:21:37,608 Yes. 516 00:21:38,944 --> 00:21:41,515 Uh, I'm sorry. 517 00:21:41,549 --> 00:21:43,587 Or congrat... 518 00:21:43,620 --> 00:21:44,922 I don't know what to say to that. 519 00:21:44,956 --> 00:21:46,926 Tell us what it's like. 520 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,397 Just tell us what it's really, really like. 521 00:21:49,431 --> 00:21:52,070 - It's not like anything, man. - Yeah, man, 522 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:54,976 do the girls just fap for you, nonstop? 523 00:21:55,842 --> 00:21:57,187 Fap? 524 00:22:01,045 --> 00:22:04,493 - All right, sit down. - Okay. All right. 525 00:22:04,518 --> 00:22:05,864 - You guys want to know what it's like. - Oh, fuck, yeah. 526 00:22:05,888 --> 00:22:07,528 I'll tell you what it's really like. Yeah. 527 00:22:07,601 --> 00:22:09,705 Here's what it's like. I go around America 528 00:22:09,739 --> 00:22:11,943 and I meet people like you, and every single time, 529 00:22:11,976 --> 00:22:13,203 they look at me exactly the way 530 00:22:13,227 --> 00:22:14,901 you guys are staring at me right now. 531 00:22:14,926 --> 00:22:17,020 It's weird. And people have preconceived notions 532 00:22:17,053 --> 00:22:19,592 about the way that I behave, about the way that I fuck. 533 00:22:19,625 --> 00:22:21,596 I feel that. 534 00:22:21,629 --> 00:22:23,633 Fucking ain't easy, broham. 535 00:22:23,667 --> 00:22:27,006 Not easy at all. I've had so many insane sexual encounters. 536 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,825 And truthfully, the thing that I want the most 537 00:22:29,850 --> 00:22:33,691 is incredibly simple, but I could never really ask for it. 538 00:22:33,820 --> 00:22:35,857 What? 539 00:22:36,438 --> 00:22:40,245 So, my dick is shaped like a manatee. 540 00:22:40,270 --> 00:22:41,845 In the sense that, like, you know how, like, 541 00:22:41,869 --> 00:22:43,773 the manatee is... have, like, a bend 542 00:22:43,807 --> 00:22:46,144 and, like, a... So my dick is bent. 543 00:22:46,178 --> 00:22:48,717 The thing that satisfies me most in life 544 00:22:48,750 --> 00:22:53,192 is when that bend simply gets straightened. 545 00:22:53,225 --> 00:22:55,664 There's no STD threat whatsoever. 546 00:22:55,697 --> 00:22:58,135 It's truly my heaven on Earth, but I could never ask for that 547 00:22:58,168 --> 00:22:59,739 because it's so weird, 548 00:22:59,772 --> 00:23:01,676 and the women would tell all their friends. 549 00:23:01,709 --> 00:23:04,548 But that wouldn't happen with my soulmate. 550 00:23:04,582 --> 00:23:06,151 I'm looking for love. 551 00:23:06,184 --> 00:23:08,188 I'm looking for my wife, okay? 552 00:23:08,222 --> 00:23:10,560 Hey, let us see your dick. 553 00:23:12,665 --> 00:23:16,639 No. But you asked me what it's like. 554 00:23:16,673 --> 00:23:17,784 It's not even that interesting. 555 00:23:17,808 --> 00:23:18,743 - It's actually... - Come on, Dicky. 556 00:23:20,112 --> 00:23:22,083 - Come on. - Uh... I love it. 557 00:23:22,116 --> 00:23:23,553 Hey, come on, Lil Dicky. 558 00:23:23,586 --> 00:23:24,631 Come on, Lil Dicky, come on. 559 00:23:24,655 --> 00:23:25,691 Let me see it. 560 00:23:25,724 --> 00:23:26,659 You always talk all this shit 561 00:23:26,693 --> 00:23:27,928 about your dick, 562 00:23:27,962 --> 00:23:29,765 but you never show it to anybody. 563 00:23:29,799 --> 00:23:31,512 Come on, Lil Dicky. - Come on! 564 00:23:31,536 --> 00:23:34,174 - Show us your fucking dick! - Come on! - Come on! 565 00:23:34,207 --> 00:23:36,044 Show us your fucking dick! 566 00:23:38,717 --> 00:23:40,821 What the fuck is that? 567 00:23:40,854 --> 00:23:43,225 A diaper? 568 00:23:43,258 --> 00:23:46,031 No, uh... It's, uh, 569 00:23:46,064 --> 00:23:48,068 it's called the Scroguard. It's, uh... 570 00:23:48,102 --> 00:23:50,807 Look it up on YouTube. It's the funniest thing you'll ever see. 571 00:23:50,841 --> 00:23:53,580 It's, like, STD prevention, 572 00:23:53,613 --> 00:23:55,751 but, like, the comedy version. 573 00:23:57,724 --> 00:24:00,226 Show us your dick, Lil Dicky! 574 00:24:15,243 --> 00:24:17,093 Oh... 575 00:24:17,126 --> 00:24:18,963 Connor? 576 00:24:19,965 --> 00:24:21,234 Who's that? 577 00:24:23,172 --> 00:24:25,911 Yo, they're all in there. They're still chillin'. 578 00:24:26,879 --> 00:24:29,084 - ♪ Sober up ♪ - Was that Lil Dicky? 579 00:24:32,256 --> 00:24:34,227 ♪ You should be... ♪ 580 00:24:34,260 --> 00:24:35,764 Lil Dicky! 581 00:24:35,797 --> 00:24:38,970 ♪ Gone by now ♪ 582 00:24:39,003 --> 00:24:41,026 ♪ But you're not ♪ 583 00:24:41,051 --> 00:24:44,124 ♪ Don't know how I got ♪ 584 00:24:44,149 --> 00:24:46,713 ♪ So damn lucky. ♪ 585 00:24:54,668 --> 00:24:57,574 ♪ I'm drunk ♪ 586 00:24:57,608 --> 00:24:59,779 ♪ I'm really, really drunk... ♪ 587 00:25:01,314 --> 00:25:02,754 - ♪ I'm drunk ♪ - MAN: Hey, it's him! 588 00:25:02,785 --> 00:25:04,989 Turn around! 589 00:25:05,022 --> 00:25:06,982 - It's him, it's him! - It's him, it's him! 590 00:25:24,060 --> 00:25:26,866 Hey, motherfucker. What the fuck are you thinking, boy? 591 00:25:26,899 --> 00:25:29,772 Whoa! Hey! Stand your ground! Stand your ground! 592 00:25:29,805 --> 00:25:32,143 - What? - I'm standing my ground! 593 00:25:32,176 --> 00:25:35,751 You stand your ground, I'm standing mine, so no reason! 594 00:25:36,451 --> 00:25:38,823 - That ain't how it works. - Uh... 595 00:25:38,857 --> 00:25:40,159 Lil Dicky! I'm Lil Dicky! 596 00:25:40,192 --> 00:25:41,304 Please don't, please just... 597 00:25:41,328 --> 00:25:43,098 - Lil Dicky? - Yeah. 598 00:25:43,132 --> 00:25:44,802 - The rapper? - Yeah! Yes! 599 00:25:44,835 --> 00:25:48,041 The rapper. That's me. I'm, uh, I'm here. 600 00:25:48,075 --> 00:25:51,181 - So, I got to use your phone, it's... - No, you ain't. 601 00:25:51,214 --> 00:25:53,953 Yes, I am. What do you mean I'm not? Of co... Uh, uh... 602 00:25:53,987 --> 00:25:56,959 Obviously this is... Look at the situation, man. 603 00:25:56,993 --> 00:25:58,763 Can't you tell by my posture? 604 00:25:58,797 --> 00:26:00,901 Prove it. 605 00:26:00,934 --> 00:26:05,176 Prove it. Uh... 606 00:26:06,746 --> 00:26:07,981 What's that? 607 00:26:08,015 --> 00:26:09,919 Like... Or... 608 00:26:09,952 --> 00:26:13,392 It's... You-you know it's me. 609 00:26:13,425 --> 00:26:16,699 Please, I got to use your phone, man. 610 00:26:16,732 --> 00:26:19,003 Aren't you a "gayman?" 611 00:26:19,037 --> 00:26:20,941 You... 612 00:26:20,974 --> 00:26:22,678 I couldn't hear what you said. 613 00:26:22,711 --> 00:26:25,316 Aren't you a "gayman?" 614 00:26:27,153 --> 00:26:29,725 Like the dinosaur lizard? 615 00:26:29,758 --> 00:26:32,096 Nah, like aren't you a faggot? 616 00:26:32,130 --> 00:26:35,737 Oh. I don't know exactly how you're using that word, 617 00:26:35,770 --> 00:26:38,242 but I suspect that depending on how you define it, 618 00:26:38,275 --> 00:26:41,081 that, like... 619 00:26:41,114 --> 00:26:44,354 like, to an extent, yeah, yes. 620 00:26:44,387 --> 00:26:47,426 Tom, what's going on out there? 621 00:26:47,460 --> 00:26:49,965 I'll be there in a minute, Pat. 622 00:26:51,401 --> 00:26:52,971 Hey! 623 00:27:10,139 --> 00:27:11,408 Hello? 624 00:27:11,441 --> 00:27:13,836 Mike. Oh, thank God you picked up. 625 00:27:13,861 --> 00:27:15,631 I need you to come grab me right now. 626 00:27:15,750 --> 00:27:17,253 - You're in room 207. - No, no. 627 00:27:17,286 --> 00:27:19,452 - I'm not at the hotel. Uh... - Where are you? 628 00:27:19,490 --> 00:27:21,137 Thank you so much for everything. I appreciate it. 629 00:27:21,161 --> 00:27:22,345 Hello? I don't know 630 00:27:22,369 --> 00:27:23,750 how to explain it to you, but you just 631 00:27:23,774 --> 00:27:25,477 got to come get me right now, okay? 632 00:27:25,502 --> 00:27:27,051 Are you all right? Where are you, man? 633 00:27:27,076 --> 00:27:29,619 I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm at, uh, 634 00:27:29,644 --> 00:27:33,160 4218 Fannin Boulevard. Okay? 635 00:27:33,185 --> 00:27:35,065 Yeah, no problem, man. I'll be there soon. 636 00:27:35,089 --> 00:27:36,902 - Thank you, Mike. Thank you. - Just got to get up 637 00:27:36,926 --> 00:27:38,863 and get dressed. 638 00:27:38,897 --> 00:27:41,301 You know, I'm always losing one sock. 639 00:27:41,334 --> 00:27:43,272 - Wha... Mike? - Yeah? 640 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,415 Uh, bring a couple hundred bucks. 641 00:27:48,448 --> 00:27:51,154 You'll see, like, when the dick's fully blooded, 642 00:27:51,187 --> 00:27:52,559 there's, like, a little bit of a bend. 643 00:27:52,583 --> 00:27:54,831 My ideal way for this to happen is if you take that bend 644 00:27:54,856 --> 00:27:56,169 and you just simply straighten it. 645 00:27:58,990 --> 00:28:01,449 Uh, the bend, and if you just take the bend 646 00:28:01,474 --> 00:28:05,057 and you straighten and then just wait. 647 00:28:06,262 --> 00:28:07,632 No, no, no, no mueva. 648 00:28:08,522 --> 00:28:12,063 Yeah, uh, do you know what a manatee is? Manatee. 649 00:28:12,096 --> 00:28:13,432 Manatee, the sea. Sea. 650 00:28:14,535 --> 00:28:16,739 Manatee? 651 00:28:17,975 --> 00:28:20,379 I am an animal. I am. We're all a... 652 00:28:20,412 --> 00:28:22,183 I am an animal. You know what? 653 00:28:22,216 --> 00:28:23,529 - No... - We-we don't-we don't even have to... 654 00:28:23,553 --> 00:28:25,562 - We don't have to do it. - No. No, no, no, no, no. 655 00:28:25,587 --> 00:28:28,228 I'm okay. Okay. 656 00:28:28,262 --> 00:28:29,230 It's totally cool. 657 00:28:29,264 --> 00:28:32,270 Oh, so... Oh. 658 00:28:32,303 --> 00:28:35,242 Yeah. Just s-still. 659 00:28:35,276 --> 00:28:37,480 Uh-huh. 660 00:29:44,213 --> 00:29:47,988 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 50135

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