Original subtitles

um

okay

[Music]

at least you got your stuff out of this

place right mm-hmm we shared a sonicare

and

it's one charging station and two brush

heads so you got to keep it oh both

brush heads even your used one i'm sh

yeah i'm sure he'll place it with a

younger one i'm really so sorry ollie

i've had sex with nine guys on your life

no in the past two weeks

i have had sex with nine guys

nine don't judge no no i was not going

to judge you this is where i'm at right

now hey holly and i was just surprised

and

impressed hi ross how are you

it's nice to see you good to see you too

what's new with you uh you heard patrick

and i broke up yes

i'm so sorry anna told me that's fine

don't be do you want me to kill him for

you oh can i think about it and get back

to you sure sure cause i'll find him

i'll kill him hard no problem okay well

the harder the better in this case right

is are we still talking about killing

patrick or uh yeah

generally sure rob

dinner's almost ready

and why don't you go change

yes i will go change right now i have

company of course company be right back

do you want more wine

yes i would love more wine you want more

hey what do you think

i think we should have a threesome with

holly

what

seriously let's do this a threesome you

i know i think we should just do this

just say bucket get a little drunk do

this you've never had a threesome no

have you ever had a threesome no exactly

oh you can't wear that wait wait holly

you yeah

oh first of all i totally saw you

flirting i was not i saw that she went

through a breakup i was being nice you

got chemistry

do you

do you think this is a good idea

you tell me i thought we were trying to

place things up yeah should we talk

about something like this first yeah

okay let's talk about it okay do you you

you want to put your mouth on her vagina

i want to put my mouth on her vagina

yeah

but i want you to put your mouth on her

vagina too

yeah okay but don't don't couples

usually break up with each other after

they have threesomes yes

that's because people get jealous but

nobody's gonna get jealous here i mean

because we all know each other we all

love each other and it's just gonna be

this like thing that we did this one

time this nice night when we were young

and fun yeah but is holly gonna be into

it i mean she into threesomes is that

her thing yeah i think she will be and

maybe we might have to sell her on it

but she likes you and yeah

sexy you should tell your summer camp

story about the makeup yeah you love the

mega cat story don't you

this is gonna be hot all right it's

gonna be hot

[Music]

i know your earrings are so pretty i

didn't notice them earlier okay you

don't want to sit at the head of the

table no come on you're the guest of

honor no please i insist i'll wipe it

down okay

oh here

oh yeah switch your room

[Music]

thank you honey

welcome

all right cheers

cheers ginger yes

[Music]

so

holly yes do you ever edit any books

about the kamasutra

no we're pretty just like coffee table

books only but we did a good one about

body piercing ooh the body yeah body

purses are hot do you like body piercing

wrong oh yeah yeah sure okay so um there

was a guy who

pierced the shaft of his penis and then

one side of his scrotum and there was a

chain connecting the two piercings so

when he had an erection the chain got

taught

they were before and after this

cool i love that

uh rob you should tell your summer camp

story that's so funny oh yeah sure sure

um so when i was a teenager i went to

this leadership camp for like high

school kids and stuff and you know the

hormones were just raging

right so one day in the afternoon which

is sort of like our off time

a couple of us got together in a cabin

four

and decided to just start making out

with each other

you know boys kissing girls and there's

a lot of heavy petting and uh

just sort of making out

with each other

[Music]

[Laughter]

anyway we were also uh switching

partners which was kind of fun so you

know one minute i'm i'm kissing lena

leonard and then the next minute i'm

like full on dry humping careth altner

it was awesome

like two years ago she sent me a

facebook a friend request

and apparently she has some

horrible

debilitating neurological disease now

and uh it said and i remember she had a

status message it was like

it's a good day today brushed my teeth

without any help

really horrible

i made out with her that day

anyway we all um

ended up getting into trouble but

from that day forth

cabin 4 was known as the makeout cabin

that is

very sad

please

are trying to have a threesome with you

oh um

yeah sure why not

okay

would you ladies excuse me for just one

minute i need to use the bathroom uh but

i will be right back

[Music]

dinner is great terence alter are you

kidding me it's all right shut

it off

man i wish i could like a spray tan or

something or shave my back i feel like i

don't look my best i've been drinking a

lot

forget it don't worry about it just get

fired up

just get out there be a man and do not

this up do you understand do not

this up this is threesome you've

been thinking about this since you

were 12 years old

you know i don't normally like salad but

this is just dressed so beautifully

mm-hmm

you have to tell me what's inside yeah

that's right

you know what i'm gonna

oh okay sure i'll be right back

hey what's going on

oh i was just getting psyched up for the

threesome

what are you doing get back out to the

dinner table what do i do i just go out

there and i pull my pants down now we're

gonna open a bottle of wine we're gonna

move to the living room and then i pull

my pants down the living room you can

pull your pants down whenever you want

we're having a threesome with holly

okay this is what we talked about

something to spice things up right right

we're having a reason with holly it's

gonna be awesome it's gonna be hot here

with your mouth and our vagina that's

right you really don't want to have a

threesome with holly i don't want to

either

what do we do

i don't want to go back out there i

definitely don't want to go back out

there she's your friend

she might just go home

you