Original subtitles

Timing and Subtitles by iFlixAsia

It hasn't rained for seven months.

I can't remember when I last drank a drop of water.

But I don't want to die.

I'm going to find that stone monkey that Grandpa told me about.

He's our last hope.

Help me.

Please help me.

I've heard your wish.

Who are you?

I'm the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom you seek.

Here, have some water.

Thank you, Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom.

It's so pretty.

You have a beautiful heart.

You can have it.

Can you bring rain to my village? The crops are dying.

I, the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom,

will never refuse a request.

[Six-Eared Macaque Monkey]

[Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom]

[Long-Armed Gibbon]

[The Monkey Is Back]

Help!

Be more horrifying!

Otherwise, they won't be scared.

I'll gobble you guys up once I'm done with her!

Get out of the way.

The Holy Madam is here!

An evil spirit.

Holy Madam, save me!

I can keep it away!

I will cast a spell!

Heaven seeks enlightenment, while the earth seeks fortunes.

People seek hearts, and a sincere heart makes wishes come true.

More.

The more the merrier! More means greater power!

Good! I shall summon the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom to exorcise evil!

The essence of the Heavens and Earth!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom never refuses a request!

The essence of the Heavens and Earth!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom never refuses a request!

The essence of the Heavens and Earth!

- The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom. - We'll grab the money once the smoke gets dense!

never refuses a request!

A real demon!

Everyone, run!

We can't abandon this baby!

There isn't...

These clothes...

You can have it.

Thank you!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom! How dare you kill the Celestial Emperor's spiritual beast?

You deserve death!

So, are spiritual beasts allowed to devour humans?

Preposterous! It deserves to die!

A human life isn't comparable to a noble spiritual beast! You shall die!

Bring it on!

Heavenly barrier!

I'll make you learn your lesson!

Once you're dead, I'll be the greatest war god in the Heavens.

Got it.

The spiritual beast devouring humans was your trap for me!

Yes, I'll kill you for a justified reason!

Surviving a catastrophe brings great fortune.

I always holler about catching demons, but I really met one.

I'm your elder. Offer this to me to help me calm down.

- Does it taste good? - Delicious.

The sky has collapsed!

It's so heavy.

That damned three-eyed freak!

Golden cudgel!

This is his treasure.

Golden cudgel!

It's you.

Thank you for saving my life.

You're welcome.

Golden cudgel!

Golden cudgel!

Golden cudgel! Come out!

Golden cudgel!

It hurts so much!

Foul monkey!

What monkey? Who are you?

He's the one I want.

Him?

He's my new pet pig.

I've shattered his invincible body.

He'll be a useless loser even if he goes on living.

Yes, he's just a loser.

He wanted to kill me, but why did he leave?

I saved you.

You saved me?

You have to remember this.

Do you have your eyes on Pangu's tree?

Who are you? Show yourself!

I'm a long-forgotten god.

You don't know me, but it does.

Pangu's tree is the first tree in the universe.

I was the first god who watched it grow.

You're the spirit of Pangu's tree.

No!

I'm Goumang, the Wood God of the East.

You've always yearned to be the greatest war god.

You want to command the celestial army.

Even though you just got rid of your biggest obstacle, the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom,

but you're neither relieved nor satisfied.

You want to open Pangu's tree.

You want to obtain the power of creation within to forge an immortal body.

Isn't that right?

What a pity.

Only the blood of the Celestial Emperor

and one other god can open Pangu's tree.

Who is it?

The one you hate the most.

Why is it that wretched monkey?

That's the nature of the universe. No one knows why.

But, I can help you.

Why would you help me?

That's because it's fun.

I'll even share a secret with you.

I hate that horrible monkey, too!

- How did this happen? - Who the hell is this pig? A new recruit?

Ba Haixing, I've acted as the pig for you ever since I was a kid!

Now, you're going to abandon me.

I-I...

I'll strangle myself to death!

I don't want to vie with you to be the pig!

Fine, you turned me into a pig to get rid of that three-eyed freak!

I won't be petty with you.

Turn me back right now!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom, don't you know who I am?

Why the hell would I know you?

You're just a fraudster!

Stay back!

How could you call us fraudsters!

I know all about your shitty scams! Are you going to deny them?

You have one last chance to apologize.

Apologize!

So, you're not just fraudsters!

You're a bunch of lunatics!

Shi Chanzi.

There's a demon here!

There's a demon here!

There's a demon here!

Kill the pig demon!

Kill the pig demon!

Stop! Stop! Don't run!

Save me! God of the Land!

Are you...

- Zhu Bajie? - No, he's so hideous.

- Well, you must be a demon. - Don't spout nonsense.

That's right!

Excuse me.

He killed 13 people in my family!

Don't blabber lies!

Even the dog at the door.

I didn't!

Don't listen to his rubbish!

That's not true!

It's so tragic!

God of the Land, I'm the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom.

Listen to me. They tricked me and turned my head into this pig.

You're so smart. I'm sure you can tell.

No way, I can't tell.

- This guy is so vicious. - He's so brutal.

- My life is so tragic! - So? What do you think?

He can't fool me! I can't sense any celestial powers!

What?

I'll sell this demon for money to bury my family.

Have pity on me!

Don't trust him.

God of the Land!

Please help me!

Stand up.

- You can have this. - Blame yourself for refusing to apologize.

Go to hell.

What do you want?

Buddy, my condolences.

Just a little bit more.

Oh my God!

You deserve death as punishment.

- God of the Land! - Beat him to death!

Why is he a human?

The fraudsters have fled!

He's a fraudster, too!

Give us our money back!

Let go of me!

You're going to pay for this.

Trying to settle scores with me?

Don't you want the golden cudgel back?

Where's the golden cudgel?

If you know, tell me!

I can't remember.

Y-You...

You're making a fool of me!

I, Ba Haixing, have always been a vicious fraudster.

I won't let you leave until I've wrung you dry.

What do you want?

An apology.

Miss, you need to tell me the reason for the apology.

At the very least, tell me how I've offended you!

Are you sure you don't recognize me?

Who the hell are you?

Have you taken a good look and racked your brains?

I've never seen you before, and neither can I recall.

I, the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom, will will never refuse a request.

Does the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom respond to all requests?

That has always been the case.

Fine, do me a favor, and I'll return the golden cudgel to you.

Where the heck are we?

Pear Tree, a paradise for gambling.

What's the favor you need from me?

Are you going to cheat?

Anyway, do a good job helping me.

When we're done, you can have your golden cudgel back.

For the record,

I have no celestial powers now.

Don't blame me for screwing up.

Don't worry. We don't need celestial powers.

Well, what do you need?

Charisma!

Me?

I offer a thousand-year-old pearl for a gamble with Lady Begonia.

I'm sorry, you don't make the mark.

You can only gamble with me.

Please come with me to the Sky Room.

This way, please.

Lady Begonia never selects people for their wealth.

What does she value?

Looks!

How good-looking a person is!

Good looks!

You have that. All the best.

I also have good looks to charm.

He's handsome enough.

The door opened!

Sir, you can come in.

- Me? - What do you mean by that?

Wasn't the door opened for me?

Yes, the comparison made him appear more handsome.

What a bully!

So, you're Lady Begonia.

I'm the landlady of Pear Tree.

Cut the crap and start the gamble.

We can only start after you've placed your bet.

What are the stakes?

Your...

whole life.

Lunatic.

It was so hard to get through those doors! You can't just quit!

I won't sell my body.

I'm not telling you to do that! You just need to deceive her!

I won't cheat others!

You...

Trick me.

What's there to trick?

Steal my heart.

- Show me. - Don't do this.

Let me see how you charm women.

When have I ever stolen the hearts of women?

Why are you crying so badly?

Do you really think I want to be a fraudster?

I want to live like a pampered lady too!

But, I can't.

My mother is seriously ill.

So, I can only make a living like this.

All right, I promise.

Must I demonstrate first?

What's the point of continuing the farce?

Despicable jerk.

Have you made up your mind?

Didn't you ask for my whole life? I'm just worried that you won't outlive me.

Let's start the gamble.

There are three forms of gambling.

The first is a test of skill.

Each party comes up with tricks and schemes to win.

But we don't do that here.

What about the second one?

The second is a gamble of luck.

Boss, what are they talking about?

People have luck and destiny.

Life and death are also decided by fate.

But, we don't dabble in that either.

Cut to the chase.

The third type

gambles with the heart.

I twitch a finger and she dies.

Boss!

Is is a gamble of the heart or life?

My bet is that she has a place in your heart.

Well, you're going to lose.

Listen up, she doesn't.

What are you doing?

I don't believe you. Go up to her.

Look into her eyes and tell her that you don't care.

Fine.

Give up and lose! Boss is about to die!

Tell her that you don't care about her.

Do you want to win or to live?

Make sure you win.

Leave it to me.

Are you okay?

Am I okay?! We lost!

All right.

I lost.

You won.

Don't stab me.

I haven't seen such an exquisite man is a long while.

Don't touch me.

I won you so that I could touch you.

I can't stand any more of your touches!

You're at your limit so soon?

If I break, you'll regret it.

I'll regret if I let you slip through my fingers.

I told you, you'll regret it.

Despicable jerk!

I won't ask you to sell your body.

Neither will I make you commit evil.

Well, what do you want?

A key.

I knew it. You're a money-grubbing fraudster.

Got it!

Let's go.

Why are you ditching all that gold for a shoddy box?

- Stop! - Don't run!

Stop!

Kill the man and capture the woman!

Don't be afraid!

Let's go!

Stop! Don't run!

Where are you going? Stop!

You won't escape!

Kill them!

Stop! Don't run!

Stop! Don't move!

Thunderclap!

Where are they?

I want to win again.

If you want to gamble,

let's bet on your treasure.

Only then will losing break your heart.

The box seems to contain something precious to you.

If you can't bear to part with it, admit defeat.

As the dealer, you've lost since your number is smaller than mine.

You've lost.

I have one more point than you.

I never dreamed that I'd see this rainbow feather robe again.

That's because I never expected him to return.

Master, they're already together.

We're halfway through our plan.

Thank you for your graciousness, Master.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom,

this is the start of your downfall.

What's with all the secrecy in inviting me here?

Where the heck is she?

Why are bananas growing on rocks?

Enough with you!

There can never be enough bananas.

It's tiring to dance for so long.

If you're tired, have one.

Can't you recognize me even in this attire?

What? Aren't you Ba Haixing?

Eat up!

Screw you and your food!

Why are you so mad?

I got you what you wanted.

You should tell me where the golden cudgel is.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom, stop playing dumb.

You gave me this rainbow feather robe. Have you forgotten about it?

I give rainbow feather robes to those with kind hearts.

I've given away at least hundreds or thousands of them.

I give away feather robes to make people happy.

Why do you act like I owe you a lifetime?

I tossed the golden cudgel into the river.

Go to hell!

Liar!

There's nothing in the river!

Where the hell is the golden cudgel?

What are you doing?

I'll take you to see the truth.

Why did you bring me here?

Do you remember this fishing village?

This doesn't look like a fishing village.

That's because you immortals were fighting.

- Us? - That's right.

We had nowhere to hide when you blew up the stars in the sky.

Impossible. We were fighting all the way above the nine heavens.

Do all immortals love making excuses?

You claim to respond to any request, but have you really helped Haixing?

Yes, you got rid of the demon for the villagers,

but their homes were destroyed.

Do you think you've done right or wrong?

How has Haixing been hurt?

What did I do wrong?

What do I owe her?

What a surprise! The government gave us so much money to relocate.

When we move into town, I'll go to the market every day!

What are you talking about?

Buddy, where were you?

If you arrived a little later, all the relocation fees would've been snatched away.

Come on, the clothes...

Didn't you say...

I was just using this place to raise an example!

It's more convincing like this!

All of you are liars!

Wait! Let me explain!

Actually, I...

Even if I'm a liar, I never lied about one thing.

Ba Haixing is in love with you.

Come on, I'll comb your hair.

Stop combing away my hair.

I've already lost enough.

When you were a kid, I always combed your hair.

I know about all your troubles.

The angrier you are, the more you care.

If you cry, that means you can't bear to let go.

That's not true.

Not true?

What about this?

When I was sick and on the verge of dying,

you gambled with this and won money to save my life.

As a result, you lost the one thing you held dear.

You thought you'd never see him again, but he appeared.

Not true? You almost lost your life to get it back.

Throw it away! Throw it!

You have to remember that we're fraudsters.

We have to lie to others, not ourselves.

Stop!

Ba Haixing, open up.

Ba Haixing.

Let me do it.

Boss, we're back.

Open the door.

Shi Chanzi, tell him to get lost! I don't want to see him again!

Boss, he's repenting. Open up.

If you don't get rid of him, you can leave with him!

This is none of my business!

Good luck.

You can't leave.

Ba Haixing, I need to talk to you.

I won't listen! I won't listen!

You have to listen.

These words come from my heart.

From his heart?

Go on.

Talk.

There used to be a girl who was in love with me.

But, I'm an immortal.

To protect this world,

I gave up on this love.

I used to believe defending this world meant defending her.

But I came to a realization.

All my achievements couldn't ease the pain in her heart.

So, from that moment on,

I decided not to let anyone fall in love with me.

That's because I won't be heartbroken over anyone.

So, keep this in mind.

Don't be in love with me.

Foul monkey! I can't believe you turned into a pig to avoid me.

I turned into a pig so we could be a good match.

You should know this.

Dog!

You're dead to me!

You've lost your celestial powers!

Your useless monkey skills can't beat me!

Pig demon!

It's you again, pig demon!

Don't think you can fool me just because you transformed to look like the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

I recognize your clothes! You're still an ass in a different skin!

God of the Land?

Don't worry. I'll deal with him.

Buddy.

It's me, buddy. Save me.

Impressive.

Puny god, you've got guts playing tricks on me!

Bring it on!

I'm out of power.

Damn it.

Immortals live by the faith of mortals.

A god who isn't worshipped will lose their powers and dissipate.

What does that have to do with me?

You sure are hardworking!

Dealing with 38,000 wishes every day!

Everyone calls you the patron saint of the world!

Who's going to worship me?

As long as I kill you and use your blood to open Pangu's tree,

I can obtain the power of creation within it.

I'll gain the invincible body of immortality and be the strongest in the three realms!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Begone!

What are you doing here?

Why did you do this?

I came here to tell you...

You can rest assured. I won't fall in love with you.

Ba Haixing.

Run!

My escape plan pulled us through.

God of the Land, how is she?

Why did you make her shield you from a blade?

Why did you make her shield you?

Are you stupid? Who do you think you are?

You're a fraudster! You can't delude yourself!

A ghost!

Coward.

God of the Land, what are you up to?

My master only taught me how to help souls pass on.

I never learned how to summon souls.

What? I asked you to save her! Why are you helping her soul to pass on?

Don't blame me.

Her injuries are too severe, causing her primordial spirit to leave her body.

Buddy, what has that got to do with me?

Ba Haixing! Ba Haixing!

Haixing!

Haixing.

You saved my life.

You saved my life.

Please, I saved your lives.

- I'm glad you're all right. - Yes, she's fine.

That's the problem!

Enough with you!

You've only caused more trouble!

I know that her primordial spirit has returned to her body temporarily.

If we don't find a cure,

her primordial spirit will dissipate, and even the gods can't save her.

I'll look for medicine right away.

Don't go.

Don't worry.

I won't leave your side until you're cured.

Be honest with me. Am I a fool?

Of course, you're a fool.

No woman would take a stab for someone she doesn't love.

You're the only one.

You're right.

You have to be truthful.

Are my actions worthwhile?

Of course not.

Why do you think I'm cool?

Do you still think I'm the almighty Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom?

I'm no different from a mortal now.

All I can do is carry you around to search for medicine.

It's good to be a mortal. Your life was so exhausting.

I want to be like mortals, playing zithers and serenading.

Do you think that's even possible?

Who's this lover you want to seranade to?

The Fire Ganoderma.

We found the cure to rejuvenate your primordial spirit.

As long as I believe...

There will be hope.

It's time to say goodbye, fraudster.

Don't wake me up.

Here.

You'll die if you don't drink this.

I knew it. You lied to me.

What lie?

You told me such a huge lie that day.

Have you forgotten it so soon?

There used to be a girl who was in love with me.

You even said that you wouldn't be heartbroken over anyone.

I admit that I care for you.

But, that's it.

The stars in the sky are beautiful.

Those aren't stars.

What are they?

The Milky Way.

The Milky Way?

What is the Milky Way?

It's a captivating scenery made of countless stars.

Aren't they still stars?

You don't understand.

When I'm fully recovered,

can you take me to the Milky Way?

Mortals can't go there.

I don't give a damn about the Milky Way.

I bet you were fooled by me again.

I can't go to the Milky Way,

but you can stay here in the mortal world.

Even for one more day.

I got it!

I figured it out!

What are you doing?

I really figured it out.

If this isn't a way to save her, I'll send you straight back to the Heavens.

- The Heavens are the answer! - What did you say?

Do you remember the last thing that three-eyed war god said?

...use your blood to open Pangu's tree, I can obtain the power of creation within it.

I'll gain the invincible body of immortality!

- Pangu's tree! - Pangu's tree!

I'm going to kill that stupid monkey! I can't take it anymore!

Endurance is the highest form of wisdom.

Killing doesn't mean death.

What do you mean? Don't talk in riddles!

As long as someone respects, loves, and believes in him,

he'll live on forever in the hearts of man.

You're an immortal too. Have you forgotten about this?

Even if the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom lives,

my goal is to make his life a living hell!

He can't go looking for Pangu's tree.

Miss Ba, we're trying to save your life.

He has no celestial powers. He'll die if he goes there.

Don't worry.

Pangu's tree is a sacred land. I'll be fine.

You've finally learned how to lie.

Actually, I already told her...

the three-eyed war god will be guarding Pangu's tree.

- You're ruining things again! - I was just being honest.

You're lying so you can be a hero.

I haven't even berated you!

Don't take the risk. I don't want you to die.

Let go of that liar.

Ba Haixing, you're getting more preposterous.

I can't believe you're clinging to a liar.

I spent so many years fawning and coddling you.

How could you fall in love with a liar?

Who are you calling a liar? Who are you calling a liar?!

You! Foul, horrible, wretched liar!

I'm the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Without celestial powers, I'm nothing.

I don't deserve to be an immortal.

Even if you aren't an immortal, why can't you fight?

You said you wanted to defend the world.

I don't care if you have celestial powers or not.

I don't care how much danger you're in.

I don't care how you do it, even if you have to resort to lies.

Make sure you cure Ba Haixing.

You can teach me!

I only told you not to give up. What can I teach you?

A fraudster's first trick is deception.

Reality is fictitious, and the fictitious is real.

I didn't think an immortal would fall for a mortal's trick.

Is this a scam or a bomb?

A fraudster's second trick is bluffing.

Make sure your opponent is intimidated by your presence.

Who told you to dress so horrendously?

Weren't you talking about tigers?

A fraudster's final trick is truth.

To trick others, you must first deceive yourself.

As long as you believe in the lie,

even the most obvious lie would be true.

What's that like?

A firm gaze.

I love you.

That was a lie.

Got it now?

The moment you believe me, you've lost.

I see.

Thank you.

I forgot something.

Pangu's tree is in the sky. I can't get up there.

There's nothing to fear. You have me.

I fear you the most.

I love you to bits too.

My words were true.

Have you really regained your celestial powers?

The Heavens want me to triumph over you forever.

Believe it or not, that's destiny.

I shattered his invincible body with my Heavenly Eye.

Why is celestial power still coursing through his body?

That's strange. Why is his celestial power concentrated in his stomach?

I don't believe I'll always be defeated by you!

Believe whatever you want.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom! So, you're here for Pangu's tree!

That's right.

The power of creation!

Buddy, absorb it quickly! I can't hold out for much longer!

This world is ridiculous! I refuse to accept this!

It all belongs to me!

Three-eyed war god, you have to stop absorbing it.

You can't handle it!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Why must I lose to you every time?

Why won't you let me win? Why?!

Three-eyed war god!

- How did this happen? - We destroyed Pangu's tree.

Boss, there's fire raining down! Run!

You're back.

- Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom! - Oh, you're awake.

Where did the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom go?

What Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom?

- He's never even been here - Yeah.

That's impossible.

He saved my life last night.

Don't you have a heart?

I saved you last night!

Yeah, he did.

- Preposterous. - Nice acting.

I'm not a good actor. She's just lying to herself.

That monkey doesn't even have feelings for her.

Haixing, Haixing! Why are you feeling dizzy again?

Didn't you recover with the medication?

Did you skip your medication?

You didn't take your medication!

If I didn't do this,

how could I trick the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom to stay by my side?

You're risking your life!

Weren't you the one who taught me how to lie?

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom has already risked his life for me.

I just have to wait for him to return and pull a little trick.

Come on, let's go.

After that, he'll never leave me.

What kind of trick will that be?

The beauty trap.

This is for you.

I've delivered my promise.

We no longer need to see each other.

Don't go.

Ever since that day, I never saw the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom again.

Some people say that he was punished for burning down Pangu's tree.

Others say that he dissipated into nothing.

But, I still believe that I'd be able to find him.

- I want to change my name. - Sure, what do you want to change it to?

Read my fortunes.

I just don't want to be Ba Haixing.

It sounds like faux happiness that ends in tragedy.

All right.

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom committed evil.

He sent heavenly fire raining down to blaze the mortal world.

Serve justice! Give us back our homeland!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom sparked fire to plague the mortal world.

He's unworthy of being an immortal.

Harbinger of calamity!

Ungrateful folks.

You make wishes to me when you're in a fix,

but you say I'm a harbinger of calamity when there's trouble.

- Smash the statue! Never pray to him again! - I wasted my efforts protecting you.

Smash it!

Wait!

Stop it! Don't smash it!

No! Stop!

You can't touch him!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom isn't a harbinger of calamity.

He has to attend to 38,000 wishes every day.

He devoted himself to protecting this world.

You can't do this to him.

He's a liar, just like you!

That's not true. I may be a liar, but he isn't.

- He's just a liar! Smash it! - Don't do it! Stop!

Smash it!

- Destroy the harbinger of calamity! - Come on!

One, two, three.

No!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom has turned to ashes!

Serve justice! Give us back our homeland!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom has turned to ashes!

- Serve justice! Give us back our homeland! - Go to hell!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

- Your hand is bleeding. - Don't touch me. Leave me alone.

When you used my trust in you and lied to me,

you should've expected this consequence.

Rest assured. You don't have to feel guilty.

This is the last time that I'll save you.

If you still want to court death, that's your retribution.

It's none of my business.

Harbinger of calamity.

Harbinger of calamity!

So...

this is my retribution for believing in you.

We're here today to repent sincerely.

We used to take our blessings for granted.

We only started to regret after we lost what we had.

Ancient immortal, please forgive our ignorance.

Forgive our foolishness.

Please allow us to call out your name again.

Goumang, Wood God of the East, please descend.

Goumang, Wood God of the East, please descend.

Do you hear it?

They're calling out my name!

Did all of you hear that?

Everyone is calling out my name.

I'll be reborn.

Goumang, Wood God of the East, please descend.

Our prayers to Goumang, Wood God of the East.

I have heard your wishes.

I also hear the ill intentions buried in someone's heart.

Y-You...

Why did you come to defeat the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom?

How dare you spy on us here.

I guess you really do love him dearly.

I won't let you hurt him.

Don't worry, I won't hurt him.

That's because he's already gone.

Haixing!

Where is she? Haixing!

My goodness.

What's wrong with you? Why did you walk into me?

You're a liar. Don't push the blame on me.

Bullshit! You're the one who's trying to molest me!

Did you see Haixing?

I was just looking for her too.

Did she abduct the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom?

I...

Don't spout nonsense!

Boss is pretty and has tons of suitors. Why would she abduct him?

She's frail and a bag of bones. I bet she abducted the monkey.

What did you say?

That monkey is missing too?

Yeah.

Where are you going?

- To nab those adulterers! - To nab those adulterers!

Nab adulterers? Who?

Haixing!

I'm tired and starving from searching.

Ba Haixing, where the heck are you?

Ba Haixing, Ba Haixing...

Let me find you as soon as possible.

Where's my banana? Why did part of it disappear?

Ba Haixing, did you turn into a ghost?

Haixing, did you become a ghost?

If you want bananas,

you can eat them.

Eat up. Eat...

Why are you in there?

Well, you're outside!

Why are you hiding inside?

Leave me alone.

I failed as a monkey, and I failed as a mortal.

I'm an even greater failure as an immortal.

I might as well be a banana. There's food and no stress.

Why are you saying this?

You're the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom.

In this world, the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom no longer exists.

Why not?

Immortals are born from the faith of humans.

What do you think will happen if people lose faith in an immortal?

They'll dissipate forever.

Why are you screaming? There's nothing to fear!

My life and death are my business. You don't have to worry.

In my final days,

I'll live my life however I want to.

Anyway, you guys won't be bothered once I'm out of your sights and minds.

What about Haixing?

There's nothing between Haixing and me.

Not in the past, not now,

and not in the future...

I have no future.

What are you doing?

You stole a banana.

You ate a banana.

These are facts that won't vanish.

Everything you do in this world will have indelible cause and effect.

- What do you mean? - Ten years ago, you saved a girl.

You promised the girl that you'll bring rain to her village.

In the end, you failed to show up.

Your lie made her a liar.

I've heard your wish.

Ba Haixing?

- That girl was Haixing? - Yes.

I know the truth.

She's innocent, but the villagers called her a liar.

You are such a liar.

She's horrible.

All that nonsense about the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom responding to all requests.

Little liar!

Exactly!

After that, we only had each other as we tried to survive.

In no time, she became a real liar.

But she was never happy.

That's because she can fool everyone but herself.

You're to blame for this.

So, she didn't lie to you.

You lied to her!

That's how she became who she is now!

The material has to be left behind, but our deeds follow us into the afterlife.

Where are you going?

To pay my debts!

The Wood God descends to save humanity.

An immortal has descended.

Heavenly fire burns the cities, proving that the world is ruthless.

The world's mayhem was orchestrated by the stone monkey.

What's the point of placing your faith in him?

Old blockhead!

Are they supposed to put their faith in a liar like you?

- Insolence! - God of the Land.

Stop playing tricks here!

Did you just call me a liar?

Do you see any other liars around?

Bring her here!

She's the one who colluded with the Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom.

The liar who sparked the heavenly fire.

She's the liar.

I don't want to be associated with that wicked immortal.

So, I've descended to the mortal world to aid you.

I will help you overcome this catastrophe.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom's lackey!

We'll use her as a sacrifice to the Heavens!

Old blockhead!

I'll deal with you on behalf of all immortals!

God of the Land!

You know who wrecked your homes

and lose everything you had.

Kill them.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Didn't you say that if I courted death again,

that'll be my retribution.

I'm sorry for taking so long to remember you.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom.

Be careful.

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Thank you for helping me regain my celestial powers!

You still have to die!

Magnificent dragon! Holy wood of thousands hands!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

I used the three-eyed war god to trick you into burning down Pangu's tree.

There isn't anyone left in this world who believes in you.

You don't have the strength to fight me.

Grandpa once said that a stone monkey lived in the skies.

He's our last hope.

Shatter!

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

You said that as long as we believe, there'll be hope.

Invincible body restored!

Trying to kill me?

You'll have to kill those innocent civilians first!

Let's see who's the greatest in the world!

You can't shatter me!

Everyone has desires.

As long as I know what they covet,

I can control them.

I got it! Conjure!

- Smells amazing. - I'm starving.

It's a huge roast chicken!

I want to have a bite!

Get out of my way!

That drumstick is mine!

Come out!

How did you find me?

You said it yourself.

Everyone has desires.

Once their desires are uncovered, their true natures will be revealed.

No one here has ever seen such a large roast chicken.

Only one person won't fall for it.

That's you.

What's so good about chicken?

Are you leaving?

Yeah, I'm leaving.

What other wishes do you have?

Tell me and I'll turn them into reality.

I want you...

to protect this world.

Boss, two bowls of noodles.

Okay!

The Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom is so handsome. I love him so much.

You gave every maiden in this world an idol.

What about you?

I have one!

Someone...

who can't be replaced.

Are you crying?

Nah, the wind is just too strong.

Liar.

I don't lie.

I was lying to you. Got anything for me?

Nope, I don't.

He does.

The Celestial Emperor's decree? Where did you steal it from?

Stone Monkey of Numinous Wisdom!

Do you admit to your sin of burning down Pangu's tree and causing heavenly fire?

I've accepted my destiny.

I'm ready to bear any consequence.

- What is it? - Your punishment is to save a monkey.

A monkey?

A waterfall cave.

I'm...

the little stone monkey.

Timing and Subtitles by iFlixAsia