Original subtitles

? Who's the improbable duo that you've heard about?

? Faster than a scooter Stronger than metal

? Who's the little girl And her domesticated rodent?

? Who's still standing When you see the dust settle?

? It's Hamster Hamster, Hamster

? Hamster and Gretel

? If they can't do it Then nobody can

? Hamster, Hamster, Hamster

? Hamster and Gretel

?There's also Kevin In the minivan ?

Do you need monster flavors like mustard...

Ranch... ...and Ketchup, but all at once?

Then stomp on down to the grocery store and get Mustanchup!

ALL: ? It's three great tastes

? That you'd think would go together

? Try Mustanchup, you'll say "How could this be better?"

? It's a serious question How could this be better? ?

BOTH: Mustanchup! Mustanchup! It's greasy!

Warning! Keep Mustanchup away from fire or it will harden like concrete!

You get that, Kevin?

Got it. Nice work, everybody!

You have another take in you, Anthony?

That disclaimer didn't quite feel natural.

Dude, these ingredients aren't natural.

What kind of sauce has artificial glorbotate?

What's natural glorbotate? I don't know.

But the only ingredients we need are teamwork,

friendship, and a positive attitude.

That's the recipe for winning the Mustanchup Make Your Own Commercial Contest!

Ah, the corporate content contest.

Free labor wrapped in an exploitive, opportunistic shell.

(GASPS) Smell that capitalism. (SNIFFS) I think that's the Mustanchup.

Or maybe your costume. (SIGHS) It's both.

Look, Mustanchup is a local company with a dream,

to sell a blend of three condiments

which nobody asked for.

And they need all the help they can get.

And if we win, they'll air our commercial on local TV!

Thanks for volunteering all weekend to help out!

Yeah. We definitely volunteered.

Where's this big surprise you promised us?

Why are we carrying all this lighting

and sound equipment? (CHUCKLES)

After we shoot the ending tomorrow,

we'll just hand it in before the deadline, and we're golden!

Totally worth spending my Saturday and Sunday dressed as mustard.

Go team!

Okay, quiet on set.

And action!

Do you need... Help! Help!

Somebody call the police!

What's going on?

A news crew is out there.

Fred, turn on the TV.

Breaking news. This is Veronica Hill

at the Kiosk Korridor, the crown jewel

of our city's open air mall, which has been burglarized

by an invisible perpetrator!

And it's not a ghost! We checked.

Are you a ghost?

Ooh, it says no.

The first hit was the electronics kiosk.

SALESPERSON: I turned my back for a second,

and next thing I know, someone had swiped a TV!

It happened around 2:00 p.m. yesterday.

And the day before.

There was this big gust of wind at 2:00,

and just like that, my designer shades were all gone!

The only robbery I saw

is the two for one sale, here at the sausage tent!

Thanks for the free publicity.

We should have edited that out. (CLEARS THROAT)

Will anyone be able to stop this villain who isn't there?

Let's break for lunch.

A thief no one can see.

Maybe it's a villain that can turn invisible?

Or an alien with a suit that can bend light!

Ooh, ooh, or teeny, tiny fairies that look cute

but are kind of jerks. Jerk fairies.

Or whatever that is. Look!

GRETEL: What is that? Scooch over, I'm driving.

Oh, wow, whatever it is, they are moving really fast.

FRED: Almost imperceptibly fast. Almost.

Just gotta get this, uh, there!

(GASPS) Is that Crimson Haste?

Yeah, she's that new speedster villain that got away from you last month.

She didn't really get away.

I mean, technically she did, but we were close,

and plus, I was super tired, and the sun was in my eyes,

and I didn't have the right kind of shoes.

And I'd just eaten that big burrito.

Haste is moving so fast we couldn't even see her right in front of us.

I bet you Hamster and I can catch her this time.

You haven't eaten a burrito today, have you? I have not.

The only problem is we don't have any evidence.

Nobody actually saw her take anything.

She's hit the same section of mall every day this week at 2:00.

If we set the camera on slow-motion,

we can catch her red-handed on video and finish Hiromi's commercial.

It's a Haste-Mustanchup two-fer!

That's not a thing.

Mustanchup! It's greasy! Mustanchup! It's greasy! Ah!

Cut! Can we get a reset on Mustard?

So close, I almost believed you were Mustard.

You know, surprisingly, that's not the first time I've heard that.

Great suggestion on setting up out here in the Kiosk Korridor.

The natural lighting really adds to our production value!

(WHISPERS) And keeps us in the path of Crimson Haste.

Ketchup, let's talk character motivation.

What's your traumatic backstory?

Um, seeing my friends and family squashed and put into a bottle?

(CHUCKLES) Whoa! Hamster, it's her!

Let's go, Hamster!

Huh?

Huh? Oh.

She must like candy more than me!

Hey, this is Hasty Delivery.

They're actually out of the Chewy Chew Chews,

would you accept Baklava Peanut Brittle?

Okay, good, 'cause that's what I'm stealing.

Your candy is already on its way

at a ridiculously high velocity.

And that's the Hasty guarantee!

And scene. With a full confession. Hamster, we got the evidence!

(LAUGHS) I can take whatever I want,

and nobody can stop me!

Not even those slowpokes Hamster and Gretel.

We're not slowpokes! We're fastpokes.

And we just got you on camera!

Oh, nice, now you'll have something to look at while you eat my dust, again.

Oh, no, last time was a fluke!

Tell her about the burrito! I was getting to that!

Excuses are boring. I have to get back to what I do best,

stealing and speeding! Catch me if you can!

Spoiler alert, you totally can't. Yoink!

Oh, now it's personal.

We'll show her who's faster! Let's go!

(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)

MAN: ? You can't slow me down

? You know you're never gonna break my stride

? I'm in a hurry

? I'm in a hurry!

? I only go full throttle

? So, you better hold on for the ride

? I'm in a hurry I'm in a hurry!

? You wanna try and match my speed?

? Your disappointment's guaranteed

? 'Cause you know I'm in a hurry

Could I get a drink of your water?

Uh, sure. (GULPS) Much obliged.

? You know I'm in a hurry

? You think that this will never last

? But when it's over then it's over fast

? Because you know I'm in a hurry

? You know I'm in a hurry! ?

Well, this has been fun,

but I'm switching to turbo mode!

(COW MOOING) (CAR HONKS)

(PANTING) I don't get it!

We should totally be able to catch her!

(PANTING) I might need a minute.

"Mustanchup? Mustanchup?"

(GRETEL GROANING)

(GASPS) Gretel!

Okay, so the good news is

we got the footage of Crimson Haste. Amazing.

Bad news is she got away.

That's not so bad, we got the footage.

Great, now hold on to that attitude

when I tell you that she also stole the camera.

What? That's terrible news!

You said it wasn't so bad!

What happened?

She grabbed the camera and bolted!

She was too fast! We were staring at the back

of her Hasty Delivery jacket the whole time.

To be fair, the jacket is quite fetching.

Hasty Delivery? That sounds like... Wait, there!

Look. It's a delivery app.

CRIMSON: Tired of waiting around for packages like a jerk?

Then you need Hasty Delivery! Our delivery is extreme!

I acquire things at a discount and pass the savings on to me!

Now that's extreme. Enjoy your bassinet!

After 35 failed start-ups and three bankruptcies, I've found my calling!

And you should be calling me! I'm on fire!

So, she just steals stuff from the mall

and delivers it to people How is that a business?

I'm gonna order our camera back. What?

Well, since she's delivering stolen goods, odds are,

if I just request the same make and model,

she'll bring that stolen camera

and our footage right back to us.

Yeah, but how are we gonna catch her?

We're just not fast enough!

Warning, keep Mustanchup away from fire

or it will harden like concrete.

Try not stressing the word "like."

I don't think we have to be faster than her. I have an idea.

Hey, Kevin, where's the camera?

Oh, I gave it to Gretel to get some B-roll.

B-roll? We need the camera for the finale!

Right, about the finale, I came up with an idea.

I think we should go big! You know, go big or go home!

I'm down with going home!

Yeah, sign me up for that second part.

Something big? Great. What did you have in mind?

I need everyone to grab all the Mustanchup they can carry.

We're not gonna have to eat it, are we?

No, no, no. No. We're gonna go and be artsy

and avant-garde-y! It's gonna be great! Trust me.

She's here. Okay.

Places everyone. Hiromi!

And action! With no camera...

Hmm, the app says I'm supposed to drop this off

in the middle of the big fountain?

Ugh, the things I do for this business.

Where are they?

Up here! Ugh, you snailtrails.

We'll be taking that camera back and taking you to jail.

And rolling... Yes!

You didn't catch me then, you think you're fast enough now?

We only had to be fast enough up here! Brain speed.

(GRUNTING) Is this a fountain full of condiments?

Yes, it's actually three...

(LAUGHS) You thought this slimy stuff was gonna slow me down?

Keep pushing her, Gretel.

You're not getting away this time.

Eat my fire trails, slow pokes!

Turbo mode!

Ow! What just happened?

Keep Mustanchup away from fire or it will harden like concrete!

(SINGING) ? It's three great tastes

? That you'd think would go together...

Why are you lip synching?

? How could this be better? It's a serious question

? How could this be better? ?

Mustanchup, it's greasy!

And cut! Whoa!

I'm so confused. What is happening?

You're going to jail.

And Daddy's gettin' himself a big burrito.

So, is this is like a normal weekend for you guys?

Just trust the process, new guy.

Wow! Hamster and Gretel saving the day

in my commercial! That contest is in the bag!

Thanks, Kevin. You're very welcome.

? How could this be better? ?

Mustanchup, it's greasy!

Okay, so the commercial contest

was a tremendous failure.

I don't even get that commercial.

Why were Hamster and Gretel there?

Let's just make Mustanchup an engine coolant

like we originally intended. But...

Agreeing with me will end this meeting early.

Meeting adjourned!

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0