All language subtitles for True.Adolescents.2009.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-ETHiCS

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:22,350 --> 00:01:23,117 (CHUCKLES) 2 00:01:27,688 --> 00:01:28,289 Candace. 3 00:01:29,523 --> 00:01:30,124 Dude, it's me. 4 00:01:31,192 --> 00:01:32,626 I know, Sam, but them's the rules. 5 00:01:34,228 --> 00:01:36,464 Dude, it's like a tiny, teeny poster. 6 00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:38,232 No one is even gonna notice. 7 00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:41,669 Dave will be here tomorrow. Why don't you come back then? 8 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:47,508 Tomorrow's the show. It's too late. 9 00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:48,176 Dude. 10 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:50,844 That's fucking lame, man. 11 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,382 Come on. When did you become like a corporate shill? 12 00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:54,782 What is this? 13 00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:56,184 Yes, that's me. 14 00:01:57,385 --> 00:01:58,686 Selling my soul here at Bop Street Records. 15 00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:03,224 Well, that's how it starts, man. That's all I'm saying. 16 00:02:04,525 --> 00:02:14,568 Check yourself. 17 00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:24,578 Check yourself. 18 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:02,950 (BAND PLAYING ROCK SONG) 19 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,188 * Circuits in my head 20 00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:09,623 * Uh huh 21 00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,193 * Circuits 22 00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:14,962 * Circuits in my head 23 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:17,698 * Uh huh 24 00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:22,803 * Circuits in my head 25 00:03:28,041 --> 00:03:29,410 * Circuits 26 00:03:31,612 --> 00:03:32,646 * Circuits 27 00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:36,950 * Circuits 28 00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:40,888 (PEOPLE CHEERING) 29 00:03:43,757 --> 00:03:44,658 All right. 30 00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:47,961 Thank you, guys. 31 00:03:47,995 --> 00:03:50,464 Thanks for coming out on a Tuesday night. We're The Effort. 32 00:03:50,498 --> 00:03:51,799 On your way out, please stop by 33 00:03:51,832 --> 00:03:53,367 and see Amy at the merch table. 34 00:03:54,702 --> 00:03:55,803 Amy, you wanna wave to the crowd? 35 00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:56,404 Which one? 36 00:03:57,671 --> 00:03:58,372 (SAM LAUGHS) 37 00:03:58,906 --> 00:03:59,807 Which one, yeah. 38 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:01,842 She's a comedian. That's a joke about, uh... 39 00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:04,778 Yeah. That's really funny. Thank you. Um... 40 00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:09,383 Anyway, thanks for coming, guys. I'll see you next time. 41 00:04:09,417 --> 00:04:10,284 Why do you have to act that way? 42 00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:13,554 What way? 43 00:04:15,022 --> 00:04:16,457 Why do you have to shit on me in front of the whole band? 44 00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:17,891 The whole fucking audience? 45 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,527 Oh, you mean all six of them? 46 00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:20,894 You see? That's what I'm talking about. 47 00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:22,696 Little fucking, conniving, undermining, like, 48 00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:24,998 stabbing-me-with- a-toothpick bullshit. 49 00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:26,534 Why do you do that? 50 00:04:26,567 --> 00:04:27,000 I was making a joke. 51 00:04:28,969 --> 00:04:30,971 I don't think it's funny. All right? 52 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:31,972 You take yourself too seriously. 53 00:04:33,374 --> 00:04:34,742 You know, it's not about that. 54 00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:35,943 It's about basic respect, Amy. All right? 55 00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:39,313 You just, like, wake up, and just like, 56 00:04:39,347 --> 00:04:44,585 "Hey, let's just fuck with Sam today!" 57 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:45,319 Where's my cheese? 58 00:04:46,487 --> 00:04:47,655 That shit is not cheese. 59 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,991 Well, thank you, cheese guru, 60 00:04:51,725 --> 00:04:52,560 but where is it? 61 00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:53,861 I threw it away. 62 00:04:55,429 --> 00:04:55,929 You threw it away? 63 00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:58,666 Well, thank you very much. 64 00:04:58,699 --> 00:04:59,767 Why did you do that? 65 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:00,568 It's my fridge. 66 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:03,604 It's my cheese. I bought it with my own money. 67 00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:04,037 I want you to move out. 68 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:11,679 Huh? 69 00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:15,683 Uh... 70 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:18,786 What? 71 00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:20,788 Like now? 72 00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:25,726 Whenever you wanna go. 73 00:05:28,862 --> 00:05:29,497 Uh... 74 00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:31,999 Okay. Um... 75 00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:35,836 All right. I'm going to go now, then. 76 00:05:37,104 --> 00:05:37,871 Be my guest. 77 00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:42,876 Okay. 78 00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:51,485 I will pick up my records later. 79 00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:00,694 If... Is this like a money thing? 80 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:02,996 'Cause, like, I deposited a check, and, I mean... 81 00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:04,998 Sam, is this really a surprise? 82 00:06:20,914 --> 00:06:22,149 WOMAN: You guys sound familiar. 83 00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:23,451 Do you guys play a lot of shows around? 84 00:06:23,484 --> 00:06:23,917 Mmm-hmm. 85 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:27,855 Yeah, we played at The Funhouse, fucking rocked that shit out. 86 00:06:28,989 --> 00:06:30,558 Sold it out. It was awesome. Nice. 87 00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:32,860 And, uh, Calamity Records has our demo, so... 88 00:06:33,561 --> 00:06:33,894 Oh, really? 89 00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:35,696 You know them? 90 00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:38,499 That's awesome. Sure. Yeah. Yeah, so, 91 00:06:38,532 --> 00:06:39,567 keeping our fingers crossed. Yeah. 92 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:40,801 Good luck. 93 00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:41,835 Thanks. 94 00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:45,005 You see, you're, like, 95 00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:48,075 cute, sweet, nice. 96 00:06:49,209 --> 00:06:50,978 Why do women start that way 97 00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:52,946 and then just turn into 98 00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,183 passive-aggressive, conniving 99 00:06:58,051 --> 00:06:58,719 assholes? 100 00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:02,923 I mean, you know what I'm talking about. 101 00:07:02,956 --> 00:07:03,924 Just tell me straight. 102 00:07:04,792 --> 00:07:05,192 'Cause I know you know. 103 00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:05,993 Excuse me. 104 00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:08,028 What? 105 00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:10,664 Dude, I was just kidding around... 106 00:07:10,698 --> 00:07:11,164 (BEER BOTTLE BREAKS) Fuck! 107 00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:11,832 Shit. 108 00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:15,469 Fuck off. 109 00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:16,937 Oh, yeah, you're badass. 110 00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:19,473 Is that the size of your penis or your fucking IQ, 111 00:07:19,507 --> 00:07:20,073 you asshole. 112 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:23,911 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 113 00:07:26,547 --> 00:07:32,486 MAN: Hang on, man! 114 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:32,920 Oh, Jesus, dude. 115 00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:34,822 What the fuck happened to you? 116 00:07:35,523 --> 00:07:36,990 I got a, um... 117 00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:37,858 Couch? Yeah. 118 00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:38,959 Don't worry about it. 119 00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:41,995 Whoa. 120 00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:43,697 Sorry. 121 00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:50,003 (SNORING) 122 00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:50,904 (GROANS) 123 00:07:51,739 --> 00:07:52,506 MAN: Down, down. Ow! 124 00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:54,074 Down. Jesus. 125 00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:55,175 Sorry, man. 126 00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:56,677 Who are you? 127 00:07:58,311 --> 00:07:59,580 I don't even know anymore, man, I'm so fucking tired. 128 00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:02,750 We picked up this shit 129 00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:04,718 from Devon's brother at the Circle Jerks show 130 00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:06,019 and we've been flying crazy 131 00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:07,020 for, like, 36 fucking hours, man. 132 00:08:08,856 --> 00:08:09,923 If I even see the inside of that van again, 133 00:08:10,758 --> 00:08:12,192 I'm gonna freak out! 134 00:08:12,225 --> 00:08:15,729 No fucking joke. 135 00:08:15,763 --> 00:08:17,164 I really, really, really, really 136 00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:18,932 need some Q-tips. 137 00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:21,602 (GRUNTING) 138 00:08:28,576 --> 00:08:30,544 SAM: Just to be clear, like, I'd just be sleeping there. 139 00:08:30,578 --> 00:08:31,679 Like, I'm super busy days and stuff, like... 140 00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,019 Okay. 141 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:46,560 See you at practice. 142 00:08:46,594 --> 00:08:47,060 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 143 00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:01,809 (DIALING) 144 00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:09,917 Hey, it's your favorite nephew! 145 00:09:13,821 --> 00:09:15,789 SHARON: So, let me guess. 146 00:09:15,823 --> 00:09:16,556 You need a place to crash. 147 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:19,559 All right. 148 00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:21,228 Technically, I do, I just... 149 00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:23,196 Like, so small amount of time... 150 00:09:23,731 --> 00:09:24,264 Sam. 151 00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:26,333 Sharon, I know. 152 00:09:27,267 --> 00:09:27,968 You're 34, man. I just... 153 00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:30,871 I got my shit together this time. I swear to you. 154 00:09:31,639 --> 00:09:32,372 Totally different. 155 00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:33,006 You working? 156 00:09:35,743 --> 00:09:36,176 Yeah. 157 00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:39,647 I mean, it's not like a jobby-job thing or whatever, 158 00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:42,082 but it's like... 159 00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:43,250 Some potentially really cool shit brewing with the band. 160 00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:43,817 Does it pay? 161 00:09:45,052 --> 00:09:45,986 Yeah. It pays, sometimes. 162 00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:49,389 I mean, you know, it's not, like, 163 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,925 set in stone or whatever, but, like, 164 00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:53,927 there's this cool record label called Calamity Records, 165 00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,296 and they have our demo, and 166 00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:58,799 we're just, like, waiting to hear back and stuff, so... 167 00:09:58,832 --> 00:09:59,232 (SCOFFS) 168 00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:01,334 Dude... 169 00:10:03,036 --> 00:10:04,037 Why are you looking at me like that? 170 00:10:04,071 --> 00:10:04,638 Like what? 171 00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:06,273 Like I'm full of shit. 172 00:10:06,306 --> 00:10:07,307 Are you? No. 173 00:10:09,176 --> 00:10:10,043 Not this time, I'm serious. I... 174 00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:12,245 Legit, straight up. 175 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,818 Of course you can stay with us. 176 00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:18,251 But Sam, 177 00:10:19,887 --> 00:10:20,387 get a fucking day job. 178 00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:22,956 I'm on it. 179 00:10:29,396 --> 00:10:30,230 (INDIE ROCK SONG PLAYING) 180 00:10:57,457 --> 00:10:57,991 (INAUDIBLE) 181 00:11:27,921 --> 00:11:28,388 SHARON: Hey, honey. 182 00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:29,389 Hey. 183 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:31,091 Oh, here. 184 00:11:32,492 --> 00:11:33,193 Sign. 185 00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:35,295 (GROANS) What'd you do now? 186 00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:44,171 I threw a squid. 187 00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:45,739 We need to talk. 188 00:11:45,773 --> 00:11:46,940 (SIGHS) God. What? 189 00:11:49,777 --> 00:11:53,446 Your father can't go camping this weekend. 190 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,783 A work thing came up in Denver suddenly and he can't get out of it. 191 00:11:55,816 --> 00:11:56,283 He feels absolutely terrible. 192 00:11:58,418 --> 00:11:59,853 But listen... 193 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:00,420 Listen! 194 00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:03,423 I talked to my boss, he gave me the weekend off, 195 00:12:04,992 --> 00:12:05,759 and so I can take you guys. Hey, Oliver! 196 00:12:07,094 --> 00:12:08,061 Ollie! Why would I wanna go with you? 197 00:12:09,096 --> 00:12:09,496 Oliver. 198 00:12:12,265 --> 00:12:13,000 (SCOFFS) 199 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:19,539 (DOORBELL RINGING) 200 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,409 SHARON: He promised, Sam. 201 00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,978 Told him how much he was looking forward to it. Blah blah blah. 202 00:12:25,012 --> 00:12:25,979 Yeah, well, surprise surprise. 203 00:12:28,015 --> 00:12:30,283 How often does he see the kid? Twice a year, for Christ's sake? 204 00:12:30,317 --> 00:12:31,819 Sharon, guy's an asshole. 205 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,321 Big shocker. Oh, big shocker. 206 00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:38,391 So is Oliver upset? 207 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:40,160 He's heartbroken. 208 00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:43,063 Of course, it's all my fault. 209 00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:45,098 Everything's my fault these days. 210 00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:47,300 He's 14, all right? He's... 211 00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:53,006 He's in his crazy little bastard phase. 212 00:12:53,040 --> 00:13:00,347 I remember when you were in that phase. 213 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,049 (INDIE ROCK SONG PLAYING) 214 00:13:36,616 --> 00:13:37,284 SAM: Yo! 215 00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:39,386 Hey! How's the job search going? 216 00:13:40,220 --> 00:13:40,954 Really good, actually. 217 00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:44,057 You got something? 218 00:13:44,091 --> 00:13:45,392 Uh, nothing solid, but, like, 219 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:47,460 I mean, ton of leads. 220 00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:50,864 What's up, dude? What's up? 221 00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:54,234 Hi, I'm Jake. 222 00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:55,135 Sam. 223 00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:57,137 JAKE: So, I hear you're a musician. 224 00:13:58,371 --> 00:14:01,008 You hear correctly. 225 00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:03,543 Going through a bit of a jazz phase. 226 00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:06,980 I prefer Ella to Billie. 227 00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:07,347 In general. 228 00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:15,488 Hey. SHARON: Hey. 229 00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:22,362 Hey, Sam. 230 00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:25,198 What would you say to, uh, 231 00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:28,068 taking the boys camping this weekend? 232 00:14:29,302 --> 00:14:29,903 Really? 233 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:33,873 Uh, yeah. I mean... 234 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:40,180 I don't know. I guess I... 235 00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:41,414 You know what? Actually... 236 00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:42,916 Fuck. I can't. 237 00:14:42,950 --> 00:14:43,383 Well, why not? 238 00:14:45,152 --> 00:14:46,286 They would love to go with you. I'll throw some cash your way. 239 00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:49,990 Yeah, I know. I just feel like it's more of a father-son bonding thing. 240 00:14:50,958 --> 00:14:53,060 Well, it doesn't have to be. 241 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:54,461 Well, I don't know. I'm not, like, a camper guy, 242 00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:58,031 you know, and I have a show this weekend. It's just... 243 00:14:58,065 --> 00:14:59,266 Well, couldn't you just reschedule that? 244 00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:02,269 Sharon, it doesn't really work that way. 245 00:15:02,302 --> 00:15:02,970 How does it work? 246 00:15:03,370 --> 00:15:04,104 Sharon. 247 00:15:05,172 --> 00:15:06,539 Fine. Forget I mentioned it. 248 00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:07,307 Dude, I would if I could. 249 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:10,077 I'm sure you would, Sam, you're such a selfless person. 250 00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:11,544 Oh, what's that supposed to mean? 251 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:13,180 Just forget it. 252 00:15:13,213 --> 00:15:15,482 Now you're all pissed at me. 253 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,417 Well, Jesus Christ, Sam, I bail your ass out on a regular basis... 254 00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:18,618 No, you don't. ...and the one time... 255 00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:20,153 Yes, I do. And the one time, 256 00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:22,489 the one time I ask you for anything, 257 00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:24,657 you act like I'm sawing your arm off. 258 00:15:24,691 --> 00:15:26,626 Oh, well, I'm sure sorry that I'm such a fucking burden. 259 00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:27,194 You're not a burden, Sam. 260 00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:29,296 You know what? Forget it. I will leave. Fine. 261 00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:30,130 Sam. 262 00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:32,499 (DOOR SHUTS) (SIGHS) 263 00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:39,239 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 264 00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:48,982 You asshole. 265 00:16:22,549 --> 00:16:23,250 OLIVER: Hey. Hey. 266 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:28,355 Sucks about camping. 267 00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:29,022 Yeah. 268 00:16:55,615 --> 00:16:56,483 Hey, dude. Come check this out. 269 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,223 (WOMEN MOANING) 270 00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,492 Turn it down. 271 00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:06,659 (VOLUME LOWERS) 272 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:09,829 Don't stand so close. 273 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:10,563 I'm not. 274 00:17:12,632 --> 00:17:14,301 WOMAN: Oh, yeah. 275 00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:14,767 Yeah. 276 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:20,273 (BANGING ON DOOR) OLIVER: Uh... 277 00:17:20,307 --> 00:17:25,245 Just a second. 278 00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:26,146 Hi. 279 00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,315 What do you want? 280 00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:29,616 Just came up to hang. 281 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,384 What's going on? 282 00:17:31,418 --> 00:17:31,818 Nothing. 283 00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:36,089 Are you sure? 284 00:17:36,123 --> 00:17:36,489 Yeah. Why? 285 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:38,425 Yeah. 286 00:17:39,659 --> 00:17:40,260 You guys 287 00:17:42,229 --> 00:17:43,463 weren't looking at porn or anything, were you? 288 00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:44,697 No. No. That's repulsive. 289 00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:46,299 Yeah. That's repulsive. 290 00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,236 You little horndogs! 291 00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:51,304 BOTH: We weren't. 292 00:17:51,338 --> 00:17:52,071 Swear on your mother's grave. 293 00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:55,508 Come on, dude. (LAUGHS) 294 00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:57,210 Pervert! Shouldn't you be looking for a job? 295 00:17:57,244 --> 00:17:59,612 (MOCKING) Shouldn't you be looking for a job? 296 00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:00,280 You know, 297 00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:05,885 it's perfectly normal for you little whippersnappers to be interested in sex. 298 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,187 If I had the Internet when I was your age, 299 00:18:07,220 --> 00:18:09,722 I woulda never left the frigging house. 300 00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:12,125 But you gotta stay away from sick shit like donkey fucking and diaper fetishes. 301 00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:15,128 Oh, and do not start chatting online 302 00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:17,497 with anyone who says they're a "14-year-old girl," 303 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:20,700 'cause it's probably some fat 50-year-old dude 304 00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:22,869 who's gonna ass-rape you and leave you for dead. 305 00:18:22,902 --> 00:18:23,603 I'm serious, dude, I saw it on Dateline. 306 00:18:23,636 --> 00:18:24,337 (BURPS) 307 00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:25,638 Oh. By the way, 308 00:18:27,374 --> 00:18:28,575 guess who's taking you camping this weekend? 309 00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:29,709 You gotta be kidding. 310 00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:31,411 Do I look like the kidding type? 311 00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,313 We leave the day after tomorrow. 312 00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:34,514 What if we don't want to go camping with you? 313 00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:35,715 Hmm. Then I'd say, "Tough shit, 314 00:18:37,650 --> 00:18:39,819 "'cause we're going, and it's gonna be fucking fun." 315 00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:41,154 Is my mom making you do this? 316 00:18:41,188 --> 00:18:41,654 No. 317 00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:45,192 I heard your previous chaperone fell through, 318 00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:46,259 and I volunteered, 'cause I'm a nice guy. 319 00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:50,230 Come on, dudes. 320 00:18:50,263 --> 00:18:51,231 Camping action? Men vs. nature? 321 00:18:54,434 --> 00:18:56,503 Just don't be a dick the whole time, all right? 322 00:18:56,536 --> 00:18:57,204 Moi? 323 00:18:57,904 --> 00:18:58,738 A "D"? 324 00:19:00,207 --> 00:19:01,841 So, you've got a cell phone and warm clothes. 325 00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,476 It gets really cold out there. 326 00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:04,777 Ollie, did you pack your warm stuff? 327 00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:05,478 Yes. All right, just checking. 328 00:19:07,380 --> 00:19:08,915 And, Sam, you've got all the maps, all my telephone numbers, 329 00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:10,517 water bottles... 330 00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:12,219 What? 331 00:19:13,453 --> 00:19:14,354 You're like a frazzled soccer mom, Sharon. 332 00:19:16,323 --> 00:19:17,857 Stop, I'm just checking so you guys don't have to worry, huh? 333 00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:20,460 Oh, thank you so much for doing it. 334 00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:23,162 It's fine. My show got canceled, so whatever. 335 00:19:24,631 --> 00:19:25,365 Yeah. I knew you'd see the light. 336 00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:27,400 All right, dudes. Let's hit it! 337 00:19:27,434 --> 00:19:27,834 Oliver. 338 00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:29,869 Be nice, huh? I will. 339 00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:32,472 Gentlemen. 340 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:33,840 Happy trails. 341 00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:35,742 Bye. 342 00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:40,913 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 343 00:19:57,397 --> 00:19:58,665 You guys keeping up with the Mariners? 344 00:19:58,698 --> 00:19:59,266 BOTH: No. 345 00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:01,934 Right on. 346 00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:27,760 (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON CAR STEREO) 347 00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:30,763 Can we listen to something else? 348 00:20:30,797 --> 00:20:32,999 It lives! Thank God you're alive. Wow! 349 00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:36,503 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! 350 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,238 "Slacknut"? What the fuck, is this shit? 351 00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:41,874 It's hard-core rock and roll. Just put it in. You'll like it. 352 00:20:41,908 --> 00:20:42,809 Jesus. 353 00:20:44,043 --> 00:20:45,512 All right, Slacknut. 354 00:20:45,545 --> 00:20:46,012 (HARD ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 355 00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:51,751 Aw, fuck! Ew! 356 00:20:52,385 --> 00:20:52,919 (GAGGING) 357 00:20:54,654 --> 00:20:55,788 Shut up! Gladly. 358 00:20:56,623 --> 00:20:58,358 (MUSIC STOPS) Jesus. 359 00:20:58,391 --> 00:20:59,426 What are you... Dude, that's my CD! Listen! 360 00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:00,493 That's my CD! 361 00:21:05,498 --> 00:21:05,898 That shit was not music. 362 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,602 That's your opinion, you can't just... Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! 363 00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:11,270 Listen to me. I'm gonna play you some real music. 364 00:21:12,439 --> 00:21:13,473 And if you like it, I will buy you the CD. 365 00:21:15,342 --> 00:21:17,577 And if you don't like it. I'm gonna have your fucking head examined. 366 00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:18,578 And if you still don't like it after that, 367 00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:23,883 then I will buy you every piece of shit fucking Slacknut CD. 368 00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:26,953 I will buy you the monster box set. 369 00:21:28,421 --> 00:21:29,722 Of course, I will have to write you off as a human being. 370 00:21:30,890 --> 00:21:32,859 But I will replace your CD. Deal? Fine. 371 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:35,695 All right. 372 00:21:38,431 --> 00:21:41,000 Now, first lesson, The Sonics. Buckle your seat belt, dudes. 373 00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:44,604 These guys paved the fucking rock highway. 374 00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:45,372 You're a psychopath. 375 00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:48,074 Love you! (LAUGHING) Shut up! 376 00:21:48,708 --> 00:21:50,009 Love you! 377 00:21:50,877 --> 00:21:51,911 SAM: Whoo-hoo! (BOSS HOSS PLAYING) 378 00:22:06,559 --> 00:22:09,095 SAM: All right. I'm gonna have the ham and cheese omelet. 379 00:22:10,597 --> 00:22:12,365 I will do rye toast and a coffee, please, ma'am. 380 00:22:13,466 --> 00:22:15,835 Okay, darling. 381 00:22:15,868 --> 00:22:16,703 Thank you. WAITRESS: You got it. 382 00:22:17,504 --> 00:22:19,506 (DRUMMING ON TABLE) 383 00:22:20,039 --> 00:22:21,974 Can I help you? 384 00:22:22,008 --> 00:22:23,042 Why'd you order breakfast? It's dinner. 385 00:22:25,845 --> 00:22:27,447 Well, because I like breakfast for dinner and that's my thing. What's your thing? 386 00:22:28,147 --> 00:22:28,881 My thing? 387 00:22:30,182 --> 00:22:31,551 Yeah, what's your thing? Like, what's your story? 388 00:22:32,652 --> 00:22:33,753 What's your deal? What are you into? 389 00:22:34,821 --> 00:22:35,955 Is this some sort of interrogation? 390 00:22:35,988 --> 00:22:37,857 Uh, yeah. You have a girlfriend? 391 00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:38,991 No. 392 00:22:40,827 --> 00:22:42,795 Yeah, you do. Kaley McDowd. Shut up. 393 00:22:43,463 --> 00:22:43,796 Is she cute? 394 00:22:45,532 --> 00:22:48,000 She's not my girlfriend. She's in the Special Ed class. 395 00:22:48,034 --> 00:22:50,069 You love Kaley McDowd. No, I don't, Oliver. And you know it. 396 00:22:52,439 --> 00:22:53,840 Jake, dude, don't be ashamed, man. I mean, we're all into different things, you know. 397 00:22:54,974 --> 00:22:56,643 Blondes, brunettes, alterna-chicks... 398 00:22:57,877 --> 00:22:58,778 I don't... ...bondage, fatties, grannies... 399 00:23:00,647 --> 00:23:01,914 I do not... ...midgets, barely legal. Don't be ashamed of your love. 400 00:23:03,450 --> 00:23:04,684 I don't love Kaley McDowd! Everyone just says that 401 00:23:06,018 --> 00:23:08,087 because I'm a class helper in the Special Ed room. 402 00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:09,088 Yeah, you like to help Kaley McDowd with anal sex. 403 00:23:10,690 --> 00:23:12,024 No, I don't! I hate Kaley McDowd! She's handicapped! 404 00:23:13,192 --> 00:23:15,895 Jake, don't be racist. 405 00:23:15,928 --> 00:23:18,197 And, Oliver, we do not talk about anal sex at the dinner table, okay? 406 00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:20,099 Hi. WAITRESS: Okay. Here are your drinks. 407 00:23:21,901 --> 00:23:22,935 SAM: Thank you much. Enjoy. 408 00:23:24,236 --> 00:23:25,438 Do you have a girlfriend? 409 00:23:25,472 --> 00:23:25,872 No. 410 00:23:26,606 --> 00:23:29,041 She dumped him. 411 00:23:29,075 --> 00:23:30,910 Uh, excuse me. No, she did not dump me. 412 00:23:32,712 --> 00:23:34,614 The relationship came to its natural conclusion. 413 00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:37,517 Dumped him. Kicked him out of her apartment. 414 00:23:37,550 --> 00:23:39,619 If it weren't for us, he'd be a homeless crack addict. 415 00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:40,152 (SCOFFS) You know what? 416 00:23:43,022 --> 00:23:45,592 Either shut up, or stick to a conversation topic you actually know something about, 417 00:23:46,225 --> 00:23:47,960 like, uh, jerking off, 418 00:23:49,729 --> 00:23:51,831 after-school detention, whacking off, masturbating your penis, 419 00:23:53,099 --> 00:23:54,634 chocking the chicken, slapping the clown... 420 00:23:56,035 --> 00:23:57,937 You're so funny. Oh, I'm so funny! Yes, I'm so funny. 421 00:23:59,205 --> 00:24:01,073 Oh, my God, stop! You guy are driving me nuts! 422 00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:02,542 I know, he's driving me nuts! God! Guy's crazy! 423 00:24:04,110 --> 00:24:05,144 All right, dudes, itinerary time. Here we go. 424 00:24:07,647 --> 00:24:09,649 Tonight, poker night at the Ocean Spray Inn. 425 00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:14,153 Hope you little dipshits are excited, it's going to fucking rule. 426 00:24:14,186 --> 00:24:17,056 Tomorrow morning, we're up at the ass-crack of dawn. We drive up to the trailhead, 427 00:24:17,089 --> 00:24:18,858 we unpack the car. We hike down to the beach. Set up camp. 428 00:24:20,593 --> 00:24:21,794 Wake up the next morning. Full day of hiking, beachcombing, 429 00:24:23,630 --> 00:24:25,898 all that other horseshit. And then one more night under the stars. 430 00:24:25,932 --> 00:24:28,100 Assuming it's not, like, pissing down raining. 431 00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:29,736 And then we hike back to the car. And drive back to civilization. 432 00:24:29,769 --> 00:24:30,169 Boo-ya! 433 00:24:32,238 --> 00:24:34,807 Sounds boring. 434 00:24:34,841 --> 00:24:35,808 Excuse me? Yeah, I mean, 435 00:24:36,876 --> 00:24:37,877 what are gonna actually, like, do? 436 00:24:39,946 --> 00:24:40,980 Did you not hear a word of what I just said? Are you deaf? 437 00:24:43,049 --> 00:24:44,984 Walking around on the beach and sleeping. Sounds like fun. 438 00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:49,088 You ungrateful little bitches. 439 00:24:50,557 --> 00:24:50,923 That's us. 440 00:24:55,194 --> 00:24:56,228 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 441 00:25:35,635 --> 00:25:37,870 All right. So, the first thing about poker is the hands. 442 00:25:39,872 --> 00:25:41,941 (WATER SPLASHING) You gotta know what beats what in order to play, obviously. 443 00:25:41,974 --> 00:25:42,942 But then once you get the hands down, 444 00:25:44,944 --> 00:25:47,980 it's all about mind-fucking the other players. Oliver? 445 00:25:49,348 --> 00:25:50,082 Oliver. Huh? 446 00:25:51,984 --> 00:25:54,754 Dude, you gotta listen if this is gonna work. 447 00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:55,988 I wanna go in the hot tub. 448 00:25:56,022 --> 00:25:57,924 Yeah, me too. 449 00:25:57,957 --> 00:26:00,593 Dudes, what the hell? 450 00:26:00,627 --> 00:26:05,598 Just for a little while, then we'll come and play poker. 451 00:26:05,632 --> 00:26:15,675 (WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY) 452 00:26:15,675 --> 00:26:21,147 (WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY) 453 00:26:21,180 --> 00:26:23,115 Ow, stop! God, you're so, like, violent. Shut up! 454 00:26:23,950 --> 00:26:25,985 She's totally violent. 455 00:26:26,018 --> 00:26:26,953 My friend's a serial killer. Shut up. 456 00:26:30,957 --> 00:26:35,962 He murdered two little girls in a hot tub last night. And now he's on the run. 457 00:26:35,995 --> 00:26:37,229 Oh, my God. Freaks. 458 00:26:44,837 --> 00:26:45,171 God damn it. 459 00:26:48,207 --> 00:26:49,041 (CHATTERING OUTSIDE) 460 00:27:00,820 --> 00:27:01,788 Little players! 461 00:27:03,355 --> 00:27:04,256 So, I threw it, and it nailed her in the face. 462 00:27:05,925 --> 00:27:07,126 Gross! And she had squid juice all over her. 463 00:27:09,862 --> 00:27:10,863 Oh, my God. That's so mean. 464 00:27:12,865 --> 00:27:14,166 Oh, did I hurt you guys? I can't believe you just did that. 465 00:27:16,102 --> 00:27:17,670 Ow! Don't pinch me. What are you doing? 466 00:27:19,405 --> 00:27:21,007 Pinching me like this. 467 00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:22,174 I'm getting away from them. They're crazy. 468 00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:25,945 I can totally relate. He's so impulsive. 469 00:27:26,278 --> 00:27:26,913 What? 470 00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:28,881 Nothing. 471 00:27:32,952 --> 00:27:35,722 Hold out your hands. But you can't look. 472 00:27:37,289 --> 00:27:38,390 You can't look. Put your head down. 473 00:27:38,424 --> 00:27:38,991 You ready? 474 00:27:41,327 --> 00:27:46,132 You can't look. Put your head down. 475 00:27:46,165 --> 00:27:47,199 SAM: What's up, studs? 476 00:27:49,101 --> 00:27:50,269 Oh, hot shitballs! 477 00:27:53,239 --> 00:27:54,106 SAM: So, how's it hanging? 478 00:27:59,946 --> 00:28:01,080 Heard this party's off the chain. 479 00:28:03,515 --> 00:28:05,184 This is my cousin. 480 00:28:05,217 --> 00:28:05,985 Hi. How's it going? 481 00:28:08,187 --> 00:28:11,057 So, what's going on? Are we doing truth or dare? 482 00:28:11,090 --> 00:28:17,129 Seven minutes in heaven or something? 483 00:28:17,163 --> 00:28:18,264 I'm gonna go in the pool. Yeah, me too. 484 00:28:18,297 --> 00:28:19,031 Yeah. 485 00:28:19,331 --> 00:28:22,168 I was kidding! 486 00:28:22,201 --> 00:28:24,203 It was a joke! Hello? 487 00:28:27,373 --> 00:28:28,107 You can't take a joke? 488 00:28:40,052 --> 00:28:41,120 All right, guys. Chop, chop. 489 00:28:42,121 --> 00:28:42,955 Poker time. 490 00:28:44,256 --> 00:28:45,057 C'mon, let's hit it. 491 00:28:46,793 --> 00:28:47,226 Guys. 492 00:28:50,462 --> 00:28:51,764 Oliver Mitchell and Jake whatever the fuck your name is. 493 00:28:52,398 --> 00:28:53,032 Guys! 494 00:28:54,901 --> 00:28:57,870 Dude, you're gonna wake the whole place up. 495 00:28:57,904 --> 00:28:59,872 Well, you know, we got an early morning tomorrow. And if you want to play poker... 496 00:28:59,906 --> 00:29:00,840 Okay, we'll be in in a little bit. 497 00:29:01,974 --> 00:29:03,075 I'm serious, 10 minutes. Okay, Mother! 498 00:29:13,052 --> 00:29:22,561 (SOFT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 499 00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:23,863 (CHATTERING) 500 00:30:27,526 --> 00:30:28,094 (DIALING) 501 00:30:40,439 --> 00:30:42,074 Hey, it's Amy. Leave me a message after the beep. Thanks. 502 00:31:41,467 --> 00:31:42,001 OLIVER: Sam. 503 00:31:43,235 --> 00:31:44,003 Come on, wake up. We have to go. 504 00:31:44,036 --> 00:31:44,636 (GROANING) 505 00:31:45,437 --> 00:31:46,438 Come on, let's go! 506 00:31:46,472 --> 00:31:47,139 (GROANING) 507 00:31:47,906 --> 00:31:48,975 We slept late. It's 9:00. Come on. 508 00:31:49,408 --> 00:31:49,976 (GROANING) 509 00:31:53,512 --> 00:31:54,080 Fuck off! 510 00:31:55,314 --> 00:31:56,048 Let's go, dude. Ow! 511 00:32:06,225 --> 00:32:07,126 So, how far is the trailhead from here? 512 00:32:08,394 --> 00:32:08,995 An hour? 513 00:32:11,430 --> 00:32:11,998 Two hours? 514 00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:15,134 Five hours? 515 00:32:17,403 --> 00:32:19,038 It's about five hours from what the fuck do you care? 516 00:32:20,106 --> 00:32:20,539 What? 517 00:32:24,443 --> 00:32:27,046 You don't give a shit about anyone but Oliver Mitchell. 518 00:32:27,079 --> 00:32:28,514 So, what the fuck do you care how far the trailhead is? 519 00:32:30,149 --> 00:32:32,418 What's his problem? 520 00:32:32,451 --> 00:32:33,485 Nothing, you guys just totally ditched me last night. 521 00:32:35,087 --> 00:32:37,156 We were getting some action. 522 00:32:37,189 --> 00:32:38,724 That and you were totally cockblocking us. 523 00:32:38,757 --> 00:32:39,391 Yeah. 524 00:32:40,692 --> 00:32:41,227 Cockblocker. 525 00:32:43,462 --> 00:32:45,364 Excuse me, but I kind of thought we had a whole poker night planned out. 526 00:32:45,397 --> 00:32:45,964 Plans changed. 527 00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:49,768 You're fucking weak, man, that's all I'm saying. 528 00:32:49,801 --> 00:32:50,436 I just think you're jealous. 529 00:32:51,137 --> 00:32:52,171 Hardly, okay? 530 00:32:53,672 --> 00:32:56,175 I'm glad you guys had a great time with the little fucking girls in the pool. 531 00:32:56,408 --> 00:32:59,311 (MOCKING) 532 00:33:00,046 --> 00:33:00,446 But you know what? 533 00:33:01,413 --> 00:33:01,980 From now on, 534 00:33:02,814 --> 00:33:04,250 we're a team. 535 00:33:04,283 --> 00:33:05,017 Please. 536 00:33:06,218 --> 00:33:07,286 No, I'm serious. I'm dead fucking serious. 537 00:33:08,154 --> 00:33:08,720 This is a safety issue. 538 00:33:09,755 --> 00:33:10,289 You got it? 539 00:33:11,690 --> 00:33:12,291 Oliver. Fine! 540 00:33:13,525 --> 00:33:14,160 Jake. 541 00:33:16,295 --> 00:33:17,363 We're a team. 542 00:33:17,396 --> 00:33:18,597 Yay! 543 00:33:20,532 --> 00:33:21,367 That's right. 544 00:33:25,137 --> 00:33:25,537 Be quiet. 545 00:33:36,448 --> 00:33:37,516 What are we doing here? 546 00:33:37,549 --> 00:33:38,016 Camping supplies. 547 00:33:39,551 --> 00:33:41,053 I don't like M-80s. 548 00:33:41,087 --> 00:33:43,155 Don't be gay, Jake. Yeah, don't be gay. 549 00:33:43,189 --> 00:33:44,423 I'm not, I just don't like them. 550 00:33:44,456 --> 00:33:45,357 Greetings, ma'am. 551 00:33:46,392 --> 00:33:47,659 We need Roman candles, 552 00:33:49,161 --> 00:33:52,798 we need bottle rockets, we need exploding shit. 553 00:33:52,831 --> 00:33:55,134 We also need some little granny sparklers for our little gay friend here. 554 00:33:55,167 --> 00:33:56,068 Shut up! (MOCKING) Shut up. 555 00:33:58,604 --> 00:33:59,405 (ROCK SONG PLAYING ON CAR STEREO) 556 00:34:06,812 --> 00:34:10,616 Hey, Jake, you got a CD you wanna play? 557 00:34:10,649 --> 00:34:12,818 I'm not gay 'cause I don't like M-80s. 558 00:34:12,851 --> 00:34:13,585 I know, dude, I was just kidding. 559 00:34:51,490 --> 00:34:54,126 SAM: I'm obviously safe because I'm already in my 30s, 560 00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:55,627 but it's fucking creepy. There's this plague that hits them all in their 20s. 561 00:34:57,396 --> 00:34:59,298 Like Jim Morrison, 27, in the frigging tub. 562 00:34:59,831 --> 00:35:01,267 Kurt Cobain, 27. 563 00:35:02,334 --> 00:35:03,135 Um, let me see. 564 00:35:04,603 --> 00:35:06,872 Jimi Hendrix, 26. 565 00:35:07,673 --> 00:35:09,875 Janis Joplin, 27. 566 00:35:11,410 --> 00:35:13,645 John Bonham. I think he was, like, 30. 567 00:35:16,182 --> 00:35:17,216 Um... OLIVER: John Bonham was from Led Zeppelin, right? 568 00:35:17,249 --> 00:35:18,417 Yes. A-plus for you. 569 00:35:24,356 --> 00:35:25,657 All right. Looking good, gentlemen. 570 00:35:26,825 --> 00:35:29,361 Aren't you gonna wear your hiking boots? 571 00:35:29,395 --> 00:35:30,196 These are my hiking boots. 572 00:35:33,965 --> 00:35:35,133 Follow me, gentlemen. I know the way. 573 00:35:44,576 --> 00:35:45,277 SAM: You guys aware of 574 00:35:46,445 --> 00:35:47,546 proper shitting-in-the-woods technique? 575 00:35:48,980 --> 00:35:49,848 BOYS: What? 576 00:35:51,583 --> 00:35:52,884 SAM: Are you aware of proper shitting-in-the-woods technique? 577 00:35:53,852 --> 00:35:55,754 OLIVER: You gotta be kidding. 578 00:35:55,787 --> 00:35:58,424 SAM: I'm not kidding, I looked it up online. 579 00:35:58,457 --> 00:35:58,890 Dude! 580 00:36:01,260 --> 00:36:02,861 Let me hear it. Do you know how to do it? 581 00:36:02,894 --> 00:36:04,896 OLIVER: Do you get any girls at all? 582 00:36:04,930 --> 00:36:06,432 SAM: What do you think? 'Cause you act like a pig. 583 00:36:06,465 --> 00:36:07,566 OLIVER: Seriously. 584 00:36:07,599 --> 00:36:08,200 I don't get girls. 585 00:36:09,034 --> 00:36:10,969 OLIVER: I know you don't. I get women. 586 00:36:11,002 --> 00:36:12,204 No, you don't. You get girls. I get women. 587 00:36:13,339 --> 00:36:14,373 JAKE: Oh, really? SAM: Big difference. 588 00:36:15,774 --> 00:36:16,875 So, is that why you had to move into Oliver's house? 589 00:36:32,991 --> 00:36:33,825 JAKE: So, what base did you get to? 590 00:36:33,859 --> 00:36:34,393 With Ashley. 591 00:36:36,362 --> 00:36:37,563 I touched her boob when we were frenching. 592 00:36:37,596 --> 00:36:38,297 What base is that? 593 00:36:39,498 --> 00:36:39,965 Second, I think. 594 00:36:42,268 --> 00:36:43,201 I touched Cara's boob too. 595 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:45,504 Mostly by accident. 596 00:36:45,537 --> 00:36:46,338 Ashley was hotter. 597 00:36:46,872 --> 00:36:47,339 No, she wasn't. 598 00:36:48,374 --> 00:36:49,408 Her boobs were bigger. 599 00:36:49,441 --> 00:36:49,841 So what? 600 00:36:51,510 --> 00:36:53,679 There's more to a woman than her boobs. 601 00:36:53,712 --> 00:36:55,447 How would you know? You've never even had a girlfriend. 602 00:36:55,481 --> 00:36:56,214 Girls prefer gentlemen. 603 00:36:56,782 --> 00:36:57,583 My sister told me. 604 00:36:58,850 --> 00:36:59,951 So, why don't you go have sex with your sister? 605 00:36:59,985 --> 00:37:00,686 Don't be sick. 606 00:37:02,754 --> 00:37:03,989 You're gonna have sex with your sister and then your penis is gonna fall off. 607 00:37:05,924 --> 00:37:07,293 And then she's gonna put your penis in a pickle jar for a midnight snack. 608 00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:08,794 Excuse me. 609 00:37:10,562 --> 00:37:13,899 For your mom, dude. 610 00:37:13,932 --> 00:37:15,534 All right, all right. I got it. 611 00:37:16,535 --> 00:37:17,936 Whoa! Whoa! (OLIVER LAUGHING) 612 00:37:18,770 --> 00:37:20,439 Uh, Jake... Shut up! 613 00:37:20,472 --> 00:37:21,673 Trail's over here if you wanna get some... 614 00:37:22,808 --> 00:37:24,610 Just shut up and help me up. Dude... 615 00:37:24,643 --> 00:37:27,946 Roll over on your stomach and push yourself up. 616 00:37:27,979 --> 00:37:29,481 I can't! Dude, yes you can. Come on. 617 00:37:30,716 --> 00:37:33,485 No, I can't. Now, will you just help me up? 618 00:37:33,519 --> 00:37:35,287 Oh, Jesus, you need to work on your ruggedness, my man. 619 00:37:36,722 --> 00:37:37,323 Don't touch me. 620 00:37:38,023 --> 00:37:38,990 Dude, that was hilarious. 621 00:37:39,024 --> 00:37:39,658 F you! 622 00:37:40,626 --> 00:37:41,560 Whoa, Jake! Language! 623 00:37:43,362 --> 00:37:44,363 You guys always gang up on me and pick on me. 624 00:37:44,396 --> 00:37:44,863 We do not! 625 00:37:45,897 --> 00:37:46,565 Yes, you do. And I'm sick of it! 626 00:37:47,466 --> 00:37:47,999 Jake, where are you going? 627 00:37:48,534 --> 00:37:50,636 Back to the car. 628 00:37:50,669 --> 00:37:52,604 Will you stop being such a drama queen? 629 00:37:52,638 --> 00:37:53,271 I'm not being a drama queen. 630 00:37:54,506 --> 00:37:57,743 I've just had it with you two Neanderthals. 631 00:37:57,776 --> 00:38:00,612 Jake, we're sorry, all right. 632 00:38:00,646 --> 00:38:01,613 Just tell him you're sorry. Dude, I didn't even do anything. 633 00:38:01,647 --> 00:38:03,915 Just tell him you're... 634 00:38:03,949 --> 00:38:06,051 All right, Jake, I'm sorry, dude. 635 00:38:06,084 --> 00:38:08,086 Come back, man, we'll party, it'll rule. 636 00:38:08,119 --> 00:38:08,787 Seriously. 637 00:38:10,522 --> 00:38:11,323 Don't leave me alone with this little dick breath, all right? 638 00:38:11,357 --> 00:38:11,990 Dude. 639 00:38:16,695 --> 00:38:17,863 Yeah, don't leave me with this bastard shithead asshole. 640 00:38:18,830 --> 00:38:20,532 Dickhead prick. 641 00:38:20,566 --> 00:38:20,899 Fart licker. 642 00:38:22,133 --> 00:38:22,934 He licks farts, Jake. 643 00:38:23,602 --> 00:38:23,935 Yeah, I do. 644 00:38:32,844 --> 00:38:34,880 SAM: (CLAPPING) Yeah! Jakey! 645 00:38:37,048 --> 00:38:38,049 That's right, my boy. Come on back. 646 00:38:39,651 --> 00:38:40,652 SAM: I knew you had it in you, soldier. 647 00:38:40,686 --> 00:38:41,387 Come on. 648 00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:42,554 Put 'em up, dog. 649 00:38:43,021 --> 00:38:43,555 Right here. 650 00:38:44,890 --> 00:38:46,592 Right there? Right here. 651 00:38:46,625 --> 00:38:47,393 Gimme a little something. 652 00:38:47,426 --> 00:38:48,026 Come on. 653 00:38:48,727 --> 00:38:49,327 You want to. 654 00:38:50,496 --> 00:38:52,531 OLIVER: Don't be mad. Well, that's cool. 655 00:38:52,564 --> 00:38:53,999 You don't have to do that 'cause, you can... Oh, love it, Jakey. 656 00:38:54,032 --> 00:38:56,768 (MAKING KISSING NOISES) 657 00:38:56,802 --> 00:38:57,669 I love it! Kiss me! 658 00:39:00,772 --> 00:39:02,441 How you guys doing? 659 00:39:02,474 --> 00:39:03,341 You guys getting any blisters or anything? 660 00:39:04,109 --> 00:39:05,511 No, I'm good. I'm good too. 661 00:39:05,544 --> 00:39:06,512 You sure? BOTH: Yeah. 662 00:39:06,545 --> 00:39:06,912 All right. 663 00:39:09,114 --> 00:39:12,751 You start to get tired, let me know, and I'll tell you to grow some balls. 664 00:39:12,784 --> 00:39:14,553 OLIVER: Come on, Sam, are we almost there? 665 00:39:14,586 --> 00:39:17,055 SAM: Dude, I'm, like, twice your age. You're already tired? 666 00:39:17,088 --> 00:39:18,023 OLIVER: I feel like we've been walking forever. 667 00:39:18,056 --> 00:39:20,025 SAM: We've been walking for, like, 20 minutes. 668 00:39:20,058 --> 00:39:21,126 Wuss! Wuss! OLIVER: Shut up! 669 00:39:37,943 --> 00:39:47,986 (INSECT BUZZING) 670 00:39:47,986 --> 00:39:57,996 (INSECT BUZZING) 671 00:41:12,771 --> 00:41:13,238 Come here. Let's check the water. 672 00:41:15,874 --> 00:41:16,842 Come on! 673 00:42:01,319 --> 00:42:03,955 Yeah, I don't wanna say anything like, "I told you so." 674 00:42:22,273 --> 00:42:22,908 Shit! 675 00:42:23,709 --> 00:42:24,142 What? 676 00:42:26,344 --> 00:42:27,045 Little chilly. Not a problem. 677 00:42:27,946 --> 00:42:28,747 JAKE: What are you doing? 678 00:42:28,780 --> 00:42:29,247 Going in. 679 00:42:30,015 --> 00:42:30,949 In your underwear? 680 00:42:30,982 --> 00:42:31,650 No. 681 00:42:33,752 --> 00:42:34,085 No way. (GROANS) 682 00:42:34,653 --> 00:42:35,253 What? 683 00:42:36,321 --> 00:42:37,589 You can't skinny dip here. Why not? 684 00:42:39,390 --> 00:42:42,761 I mean, it's the middle of the day and it's a public beach. 685 00:42:42,794 --> 00:42:44,730 There's no one here. Hello! 686 00:42:47,833 --> 00:42:48,600 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 687 00:42:50,168 --> 00:42:53,071 What, you guys aren't going in? Dude, it's freezing! 688 00:42:53,104 --> 00:42:53,739 Jake. 689 00:42:54,806 --> 00:42:55,741 Thank you. I'd rather not. 690 00:42:57,743 --> 00:42:58,343 Fucking chicken shits, man. 691 00:43:01,647 --> 00:43:02,113 Yes! 692 00:43:04,315 --> 00:43:05,350 Love the smell of the ocean, boys! 693 00:43:07,986 --> 00:43:09,020 (CELL PHONE RINGING) Whoa! 694 00:43:09,054 --> 00:43:12,257 How's that for reception? 695 00:43:12,290 --> 00:43:12,924 Hello? 696 00:43:14,025 --> 00:43:14,525 Hey, Sam, it's JR. 697 00:43:15,794 --> 00:43:17,128 Dude, what do you want? 698 00:43:17,162 --> 00:43:19,364 Well, the short story is that Richard Kline 699 00:43:21,399 --> 00:43:23,268 from Calamity Records is interested in meeting... (LINE BREAKING) 700 00:43:23,301 --> 00:43:24,035 Wait! Wait! What? What? 701 00:43:25,336 --> 00:43:27,338 Richard Kline... Wait! What? JR! Hold on. 702 00:43:28,239 --> 00:43:31,109 Hello? I can't hear you. 703 00:43:31,142 --> 00:43:32,944 Can you hear me? Dude, I'm on a fucking beach, I can't... Hello? 704 00:43:32,978 --> 00:43:33,912 Hello? I'm losing you. Hold on! 705 00:43:33,945 --> 00:43:34,612 Sam? 706 00:43:35,313 --> 00:43:36,715 Hello? JR! 707 00:43:39,985 --> 00:43:41,152 Dudes! I just got a record deal! 708 00:43:41,853 --> 00:43:42,220 That's great. 709 00:43:43,354 --> 00:43:45,090 Congratulations. No, I'm serious, dude. 710 00:43:45,123 --> 00:43:47,292 JR just called, and Calamity called and, like... 711 00:43:47,325 --> 00:43:48,827 I didn't hear the whole thing but, like, I think I got it. 712 00:43:48,860 --> 00:43:49,394 I'm serious. Sweet. 713 00:43:50,762 --> 00:43:52,063 Fuck. We gotta go back! 714 00:43:52,097 --> 00:43:54,132 We just got here. 715 00:43:54,165 --> 00:43:56,067 Ok, hold on. I'm just, like, processing. 716 00:43:56,101 --> 00:43:57,335 Fuck, I'm having a heart attack. 717 00:43:57,368 --> 00:43:58,003 Okay. 718 00:43:59,370 --> 00:44:00,806 Dudes. This is it. 719 00:44:03,842 --> 00:44:04,710 This is it, dude. It's the moment. 720 00:44:05,476 --> 00:44:06,277 The moment is here! 721 00:44:06,812 --> 00:44:07,345 Yes! 722 00:44:07,946 --> 00:44:08,413 See ya! 723 00:44:09,247 --> 00:44:10,048 Wouldn't wanna be ya! 724 00:44:10,081 --> 00:44:10,882 Boo-ya! 725 00:44:40,111 --> 00:44:42,313 OLIVER: So, are you gonna be on MTV? 726 00:44:42,347 --> 00:44:43,448 Maybe, if they ever start playing frigging music again. 727 00:44:45,784 --> 00:44:47,853 Be pretty fucking cool, though, right? 728 00:44:47,886 --> 00:44:49,821 I admit that would be really cool. 729 00:44:51,356 --> 00:44:51,689 (OWL HOOTS) 730 00:44:53,859 --> 00:44:54,726 What was that? 731 00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:56,494 SAM: A serial killer. 732 00:44:56,527 --> 00:44:57,262 Shut up. 733 00:44:58,129 --> 00:44:58,964 It's just an owl, dude. 734 00:45:00,932 --> 00:45:03,168 But, you know, actually, Washington State is famous for its serial killers. 735 00:45:03,201 --> 00:45:04,702 Ted Bundy, we've got the Green River Killer, 736 00:45:06,337 --> 00:45:08,106 we've got the Hillside Strangler, who was caught up in Bellingham. 737 00:45:08,139 --> 00:45:08,807 So? 738 00:45:10,241 --> 00:45:11,810 So, I'm just a little concerned, that's all. 739 00:45:11,843 --> 00:45:14,212 Concerned about what? 740 00:45:14,245 --> 00:45:15,914 Uh, just all that shit that happened here last March. 741 00:45:16,982 --> 00:45:20,418 What happened here in March? 742 00:45:20,451 --> 00:45:22,087 Oh, whatever. Come on, you guys know, right? 743 00:45:23,421 --> 00:45:23,955 No, I don't. 744 00:45:26,424 --> 00:45:28,026 You're joking. Oliver, you know, right? Shut the hell up. 745 00:45:29,394 --> 00:45:30,929 I'm serious, whatever. 746 00:45:30,962 --> 00:45:33,064 We're sitting around a campfire, 747 00:45:33,098 --> 00:45:34,299 he's telling us a scary story to get us freaked out. 748 00:45:34,332 --> 00:45:36,334 We're not complete idiots. 749 00:45:36,367 --> 00:45:38,136 Dude, if you don't want to believe it, that's totally fine with me. 750 00:45:39,270 --> 00:45:40,205 Makes no difference. OLIVER: Whatever. 751 00:45:41,272 --> 00:45:45,443 Probably better if you don't know. 752 00:45:45,476 --> 00:45:46,077 Tell us. 753 00:45:48,479 --> 00:45:50,816 Dude, it's no big deal, all right, there was a family, 754 00:45:50,849 --> 00:45:51,950 and they came up here to go camping last March. 755 00:45:53,518 --> 00:45:55,420 And they didn't come back. Blah, blah, blah. That whole thing. 756 00:45:55,453 --> 00:45:56,487 What happened? What? The murder weapon or what? 757 00:45:57,588 --> 00:45:58,890 They were murdered? Yeah, brutally. 758 00:46:00,391 --> 00:46:02,027 Yeah, it was a whole family. It was a mom and dad, and, uh, 759 00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:07,933 two boys and a girl. And they were murdered and mutilated. 760 00:46:07,966 --> 00:46:09,300 It's weird, actually, when the police found their bodies, the killer, had, like, 761 00:46:11,402 --> 00:46:15,106 sliced open their cheeks from mouth to ear and kind of, like, pulled their faces up 762 00:46:15,573 --> 00:46:16,474 in like a frozen scream. 763 00:46:17,408 --> 00:46:18,476 Sick! Yeah, totally sick. 764 00:46:20,445 --> 00:46:21,813 Did they catch the killer? 765 00:46:21,847 --> 00:46:23,982 (SIGHS) No, I don't think so. 766 00:46:25,550 --> 00:46:27,152 But it's not like the murders were right here. 767 00:46:27,185 --> 00:46:30,221 It was two or three miles up the beach, so... 768 00:46:30,255 --> 00:46:31,022 That's still pretty close. 769 00:46:32,858 --> 00:46:33,524 Yeah. Guess it's all relative. 770 00:46:35,961 --> 00:46:36,561 That's bullshit, dude. 771 00:46:38,263 --> 00:46:40,999 Dude, I'm just reporting the facts as they are. 772 00:46:41,032 --> 00:46:43,869 Come on, if it was true, we would have heard about it in the news 773 00:46:43,902 --> 00:46:45,904 or something, or read it in the papers. I read tons of stuff about it. 774 00:46:45,937 --> 00:46:55,113 How else would I know so many details? 775 00:46:55,146 --> 00:46:57,115 Mmm. Yummy. 776 00:46:59,484 --> 00:47:00,185 (OWL HOOTS) 777 00:47:21,472 --> 00:47:34,285 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 778 00:47:34,319 --> 00:47:35,020 (SAM SCREAMS) 779 00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:35,987 (BOYS SCREAM) 780 00:47:37,555 --> 00:47:39,925 Oh, no, guys. It's me. It's just Sam. I was just fucking around. 781 00:47:41,026 --> 00:47:43,895 I didn't see... I'm sorry, okay. 782 00:47:43,929 --> 00:47:47,232 SAM: I didn't see anything! 783 00:47:47,265 --> 00:47:48,133 Get off me, fag! 784 00:47:59,177 --> 00:48:02,613 Where are you going? 785 00:48:02,647 --> 00:48:04,082 Fuck you. 786 00:49:00,271 --> 00:49:01,072 Jake! 787 00:49:20,158 --> 00:49:20,825 (GROANS) 788 00:49:24,695 --> 00:49:25,430 (GRUNTS) 789 00:49:44,415 --> 00:49:45,050 Jake! 790 00:49:50,321 --> 00:49:51,122 Oliver! 791 00:50:00,065 --> 00:50:00,498 Guys! 792 00:50:03,701 --> 00:50:05,236 If you can hear me, meet me at the tent! 793 00:50:22,687 --> 00:50:24,322 Oh, what the fuck, man? Where have you been? Where's Jake? 794 00:50:24,822 --> 00:50:25,556 I don't know. 795 00:50:26,557 --> 00:50:28,126 You don't know? That's great! 796 00:50:29,727 --> 00:50:31,762 You know, for once I would appreciate it if you guys could be, like, mature adults 797 00:50:33,198 --> 00:50:34,165 instead of these itty-bitty fucking babies. 798 00:50:35,466 --> 00:50:36,067 I gotta change your diapers every five minutes. 799 00:50:36,101 --> 00:50:38,169 What are you talking about? 800 00:50:38,203 --> 00:50:39,537 I'm talking about you and your little boyfriend. 801 00:50:39,570 --> 00:50:41,472 He's not my boyfriend. 802 00:50:41,506 --> 00:50:43,541 Well, whatever, all right. But you know, he's a fucking baby. 803 00:50:43,574 --> 00:50:44,742 You played a stupid joke on him! 804 00:50:44,775 --> 00:50:46,043 Me? This is my fault? Yes! 805 00:50:47,645 --> 00:50:49,614 Oh! Oh! I'm sure sorry I forced you guys to have 806 00:50:51,516 --> 00:50:52,817 a little gay make-out party last night. What the fuck was I thinking? 807 00:50:59,724 --> 00:51:01,826 (SIGHS) Look, I'm sorry. Oliver... You're a prick. 808 00:51:03,728 --> 00:51:06,364 I'm sorry, all right. I'm stressed out. Just leave me alone. 809 00:51:06,397 --> 00:51:08,866 Dude, I can't leave you alone. I'm in charge of you, okay? 810 00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:10,635 You're not in charge of anything. You're a fucking loser. 811 00:51:10,668 --> 00:51:12,237 What? You are a loser! 812 00:51:15,706 --> 00:51:17,242 You know what? Why don't you go rendezvous with your little lover boy? 813 00:51:18,676 --> 00:51:20,311 Fuck you! Well, fuck you more, you spoiled little shit! 814 00:52:03,721 --> 00:52:06,324 All right. (SIGHS) I'm worried. 815 00:52:07,925 --> 00:52:09,194 I think we should go look for him. 816 00:52:11,529 --> 00:52:12,430 Maybe he got mad, and, like, 817 00:52:14,632 --> 00:52:15,900 tried to walk to the car or something. I don't know, but... 818 00:52:20,971 --> 00:52:29,814 All right, do what you want, but I'm going. 819 00:52:29,847 --> 00:52:30,748 Good call. 820 00:52:33,584 --> 00:52:34,219 Jake! 821 00:52:36,487 --> 00:52:36,921 Jake! 822 00:52:40,491 --> 00:52:41,592 Jake! 823 00:52:44,329 --> 00:52:44,929 (SIGHS) 824 00:52:46,331 --> 00:52:46,731 Hey, check it out. 825 00:52:50,535 --> 00:52:52,803 Oh, shit. What's wrong? 826 00:52:53,971 --> 00:52:55,373 Hippies. Stay close. 827 00:52:58,943 --> 00:52:59,544 SAM: Hi. 828 00:53:00,945 --> 00:53:01,912 Hey. 'Sup, man? 829 00:53:03,881 --> 00:53:05,883 Hey, um, we're looking for a friend of ours. 830 00:53:07,518 --> 00:53:09,920 He's, like, a curly-haired, 14-year-old skinny kid. Yeah. 831 00:53:11,289 --> 00:53:13,824 He's got, like, a blue shirt on, shorts. 832 00:53:14,459 --> 00:53:16,527 Um, I'm... 833 00:53:18,729 --> 00:53:20,331 I, um... I don't know... 834 00:53:21,566 --> 00:53:23,268 Have you seen anybody today? 835 00:53:23,301 --> 00:53:24,702 Yeah. You have? 836 00:53:27,738 --> 00:53:30,375 Think I saw somebody moving 837 00:53:31,542 --> 00:53:31,942 to the left. 838 00:53:32,743 --> 00:53:33,411 Yeah. Back there? 839 00:53:35,646 --> 00:53:36,981 Like, on a... Like, when you say to the left, like, he turned... 840 00:53:38,349 --> 00:53:39,717 On the trail, onto another little trail. 841 00:53:39,750 --> 00:53:40,418 That way? Where you came from? 842 00:53:41,619 --> 00:53:43,220 Yeah. Are you sure you didn't. I mean... 843 00:53:44,822 --> 00:53:48,459 I'm wearing a blue T-shirt. 844 00:53:48,493 --> 00:53:50,661 Are you sure it wasn't me? I'm not. I'm not sure. 845 00:53:52,763 --> 00:53:55,566 Okay, do you remember by any chance, what trail it was? It's kind of important 846 00:53:57,468 --> 00:54:00,237 'cause he's missing, and he may be lost. So, we're trying to find him. 847 00:54:01,406 --> 00:54:03,040 If you could help us... 848 00:54:03,073 --> 00:54:03,641 MAN: Um... 849 00:54:07,345 --> 00:54:08,946 We're trying to let things go while we're here on this trail. 850 00:54:10,881 --> 00:54:12,450 Or... You know what? 851 00:54:14,084 --> 00:54:18,356 If you see him, will you just not let him out of your sight for me? 852 00:54:18,389 --> 00:54:19,023 Maybe. 853 00:54:22,427 --> 00:54:24,028 MAN: It's hard not to... Let's go. 854 00:54:24,061 --> 00:54:24,829 Yeah. Okay, thank you. 855 00:54:25,963 --> 00:54:26,664 Yeah, brother. See you guys later. 856 00:54:26,697 --> 00:54:27,398 See you. 857 00:54:28,333 --> 00:54:31,302 Good luck. SAM: Thank you. 858 00:54:31,336 --> 00:54:33,604 OLIVER: Maybe they did see him. SAM: Maybe they did. 859 00:54:33,638 --> 00:54:35,540 That's the problem with hippies. Unreliable fucking witnesses. 860 00:54:36,707 --> 00:54:38,042 Well, I know Jake brought a blue shirt. 861 00:54:38,075 --> 00:54:39,877 Here we go. Side trail. Now what do we do? 862 00:54:41,946 --> 00:54:42,913 I don't know. Yeah, well, neither do I. 863 00:54:44,382 --> 00:54:45,350 Thank you, hippie assholes! Fuck! 864 00:55:00,064 --> 00:55:00,898 SAM: Well, this sucks. 865 00:55:03,033 --> 00:55:06,971 OLIVER: This super-sucks. 866 00:55:07,004 --> 00:55:10,007 Kinda sucks worse than being stung in the eyeball by a bee. 867 00:55:13,644 --> 00:55:14,945 This sucks worse than drinking a dog shit milkshake. 868 00:55:17,782 --> 00:55:21,719 (EXCLAIMS) This sucks worse than walrus sodomy. 869 00:55:25,490 --> 00:55:28,526 This sucks worse than making out with a razorblade. 870 00:55:32,697 --> 00:55:37,368 (SIGHS) This actually sucks worse than falling off the Empire State Building 871 00:55:39,504 --> 00:55:42,473 and getting your scrotum caught on a rusty nail. 872 00:55:45,910 --> 00:55:46,911 Yeah, no. That sucks more. 873 00:55:48,913 --> 00:55:50,047 I don't know, dude. This sucks pretty fucking bad. 874 00:55:54,018 --> 00:55:54,552 Are we lost? 875 00:55:56,554 --> 00:55:59,624 Uh, we are lost-ish. 876 00:56:27,918 --> 00:56:29,887 Oliver, wait up. What the fuck? 877 00:56:31,689 --> 00:56:33,524 We're in the... We're, like, fucking nowhere. What is this shit? 878 00:56:35,192 --> 00:56:37,962 Jake! Jake! Where the fuck are you? 879 00:57:14,131 --> 00:57:16,567 Oh, what the fuck? 880 00:57:25,042 --> 00:57:26,811 Oh, shit. 881 00:57:45,896 --> 00:57:47,965 Why'd you get so many sparklers? 882 00:57:47,998 --> 00:57:48,799 Got them for Little Lord Fauntleroy. 883 00:57:51,636 --> 00:57:53,070 Why do you hate Jake? I don't hate him. 884 00:57:55,773 --> 00:57:57,775 Then why are you always so mean to him? 885 00:57:57,808 --> 00:57:59,009 He's just one of those kids. Easy target. 886 00:58:01,045 --> 00:58:02,680 Do you think he's gay? I don't know. 887 00:58:06,016 --> 00:58:07,552 Are you homophobic? No. 888 00:58:09,687 --> 00:58:10,220 I think you are. 889 00:58:13,991 --> 00:58:17,562 Why did you just say that? 890 00:58:17,595 --> 00:58:19,664 'Cause I think you're homophobic. 891 00:58:19,697 --> 00:58:21,999 Well, that's funny because I think you're homophobic. Maybe I am. 892 00:58:22,032 --> 00:58:22,900 Well, maybe you're an asshole. Maybe I am. 893 00:58:24,301 --> 00:58:27,938 Well, then, maybe you should feel real proud. I do. 894 00:58:27,972 --> 00:58:28,973 You know, you used to be, like, this sweet kid. 895 00:58:30,274 --> 00:58:32,042 When did you become this, like, aggro frat boy? 896 00:58:32,076 --> 00:58:33,143 What are you gonna do? Kick my... Oliver! 897 00:58:34,645 --> 00:58:36,146 Oliver! Get back here! Oliver! Don't touch me! 898 00:58:36,180 --> 00:58:37,114 Get back here, Oliver! 899 00:58:37,748 --> 00:58:39,016 Ow! Fuck! 900 00:58:41,586 --> 00:58:48,158 You just hit me! 901 00:58:48,192 --> 00:58:48,826 Fuck! 902 00:59:33,638 --> 00:59:37,574 (SARCASTICALLY) Yay. The river. Fucking again. Whoo! 903 00:59:41,211 --> 00:59:42,713 Wanna just move here? We can go down this way. 904 00:59:45,082 --> 00:59:45,983 It's not that steep. I don't know about that. 905 00:59:46,016 --> 00:59:47,584 Oh, fuck! Oliver! 906 00:59:48,719 --> 00:59:49,954 Shit! You okay? Yeah. 907 00:59:50,420 --> 00:59:51,355 Shit. Okay. 908 00:59:52,790 --> 00:59:54,158 Let me help you up. Come here. Give me this. 909 00:59:54,725 --> 00:59:55,626 Here. 910 00:59:57,995 --> 00:59:59,163 Here. Put your knee up. So you can stand. Hold on. 911 01:00:01,932 --> 01:00:04,068 I can't use my ankle! Okay, okay. All right. 912 01:00:04,935 --> 01:00:05,302 All right. 913 01:00:08,138 --> 01:00:10,007 All right, dude, you're gonna be fine. It's fine. 914 01:00:12,009 --> 01:00:14,344 All right. Plan "B," dude. Here. (COUGHING) 915 01:00:25,856 --> 01:00:26,256 Oliver? 916 01:00:28,726 --> 01:00:29,259 Sam? 917 01:00:31,762 --> 01:00:32,963 Guys? Hello? 918 01:00:40,738 --> 01:00:42,006 Ow, ow, ow. Wait, hold on. 919 01:00:43,340 --> 01:00:44,775 What? Fuck this. Dude, I'm just gonna carry you. 920 01:00:46,176 --> 01:00:48,012 I'm way too heavy. Oliver, it's getting dark. It's cold. 921 01:00:48,979 --> 01:00:50,314 I'm too heavy, Sam! Oliver! Put this on. 922 01:00:52,349 --> 01:00:56,887 Give me your arm. 923 01:00:56,921 --> 01:00:57,888 Hop on and shut up. 924 01:01:02,827 --> 01:01:03,994 All right. Light as a feather. 925 01:01:18,342 --> 01:01:19,076 WOMAN: Come here, Oscar! 926 01:01:21,245 --> 01:01:21,912 Sorry, brother. 927 01:01:23,280 --> 01:01:24,248 Hey, brother, mind if we join you? 928 01:01:25,750 --> 01:01:26,183 Sure. 929 01:01:32,757 --> 01:01:34,691 Hey, have you guys seen a man and a kid around here? 930 01:01:36,360 --> 01:01:40,064 No, man. I mean, that's kinda hard to say. 931 01:01:42,867 --> 01:01:44,434 Did you say a man and a kid? 932 01:01:45,335 --> 01:01:45,970 Yeah. 933 01:01:47,972 --> 01:01:49,039 Like, a taller dude and a little dude. 934 01:01:51,108 --> 01:01:51,742 Yeah. 935 01:01:55,913 --> 01:01:57,347 Everything is coming together right now. 936 01:02:02,219 --> 01:02:03,287 How cold does it get out here? 937 01:02:04,221 --> 01:02:05,089 Cold. Don't worry about it. 938 01:02:06,023 --> 01:02:08,358 What if we freeze to death? 939 01:02:08,392 --> 01:02:09,860 Oliver, we're not going to freeze to death. Shut up with the freaky shit. 940 01:02:09,894 --> 01:02:10,260 All right? 941 01:03:00,878 --> 01:03:02,279 OLIVER: Should we build a fire here? SAM: No way. 942 01:03:03,881 --> 01:03:06,216 Don't they say if you're lost in the woods to stay put? 943 01:03:06,250 --> 01:03:08,018 I don't know. I've never been lost in the woods. 944 01:03:10,487 --> 01:03:11,121 We're screwed. 945 01:03:11,989 --> 01:03:13,290 Oliver, we're not screwed. Yes, we are. 946 01:03:14,358 --> 01:03:15,425 Look, I have a plan. 947 01:03:18,128 --> 01:03:19,529 We're gonna forge a bow and arrow out of that tree, 948 01:03:22,432 --> 01:03:25,102 and kill us up a good-sized Sasquatch. Suck on the meat. 949 01:03:28,038 --> 01:03:29,573 We'll wrap ourselves up in the bloody hide for warmth. All good. 950 01:03:32,176 --> 01:03:35,512 We're definitely screwed. 951 01:03:35,545 --> 01:03:37,147 Look, I'm gonna get us back to the campsite. That's all there is to it. 952 01:03:37,181 --> 01:03:39,383 So, just shut up. 953 01:03:39,416 --> 01:03:41,218 We're not gonna sit here twiddling out thumbs around a campfire 954 01:03:41,251 --> 01:03:42,419 while Jake's missing, either. 955 01:03:44,521 --> 01:03:46,891 What do you mean, Spaceship Earth? 956 01:03:46,924 --> 01:03:50,327 I mean, this is a vessel, man. That's all. 957 01:03:54,131 --> 01:03:55,132 And you and me, we're just passengers. 958 01:03:59,536 --> 01:04:00,871 Do you know about the seven states of consciousness? 959 01:04:45,950 --> 01:04:46,416 Ow! 960 01:04:49,453 --> 01:04:50,454 Wanna rest? 961 01:04:51,521 --> 01:04:53,157 Yeah, that's probably a good idea. 962 01:04:58,662 --> 01:04:59,263 (GRUNTS) 963 01:05:01,565 --> 01:05:02,566 (SIGHING) Oh, fuck. 964 01:05:03,333 --> 01:05:04,101 (INHALES SHARPLY) 965 01:05:06,236 --> 01:05:07,537 You cold? Yeah, it's fucking freezing. 966 01:05:09,706 --> 01:05:10,507 Let's talk about something else. 967 01:05:12,042 --> 01:05:13,677 Uh, so, what instruments do you play? 968 01:05:15,445 --> 01:05:20,584 Uh, guitar, bass, little bit of drums, 969 01:05:22,019 --> 01:05:23,087 shitty piano, 970 01:05:24,721 --> 01:05:26,023 bad-ass tambourine, definitely. 971 01:05:28,258 --> 01:05:30,260 You know how to play anything? 972 01:05:30,294 --> 01:05:30,694 Nothing. 973 01:05:32,362 --> 01:05:33,330 No shit. 974 01:05:39,703 --> 01:05:40,937 Dude, you gotta play a little guitar or something. 975 01:05:41,438 --> 01:05:43,607 Nah, I don't. 976 01:05:43,640 --> 01:05:45,976 It will get you laid. Kind of important. 977 01:05:46,576 --> 01:05:47,511 Um, not a music guy. 978 01:05:49,746 --> 01:05:51,048 I could teach you. No, it's okay. 979 01:06:12,669 --> 01:06:14,538 Listen, I'm sorry about that shit I said about you and Jake today. 980 01:06:16,273 --> 01:06:17,974 It was really fucking stupid. 981 01:06:18,508 --> 01:06:19,343 It's okay. 982 01:06:22,412 --> 01:06:23,113 No, it's not. 983 01:06:25,782 --> 01:06:28,085 I'm an asshole. And it's not okay. 984 01:06:30,754 --> 01:06:31,688 Sometimes. 985 01:06:37,227 --> 01:06:38,128 You're a good friend to Jake. 986 01:06:40,264 --> 01:06:42,632 He's been my best friend since 987 01:06:42,666 --> 01:06:43,600 third grade. 988 01:06:58,315 --> 01:07:03,553 I don't know what's wrong with me. 989 01:07:03,587 --> 01:07:04,554 It's not your fault. 990 01:07:13,163 --> 01:07:16,233 Yeah, um, it is. 991 01:07:27,611 --> 01:07:29,379 All right. We should get a move on. 992 01:07:31,548 --> 01:07:32,149 You ready? Yeah. 993 01:07:33,117 --> 01:07:35,785 Fucking freezing. All right. 994 01:07:37,287 --> 01:07:38,188 (GRUNTING) 995 01:07:48,865 --> 01:07:49,566 (OLIVER COUGHING) 996 01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:55,505 (SAM GRUNTING) 997 01:08:05,182 --> 01:08:06,150 Uh, shit. That's our last one. 998 01:08:07,717 --> 01:08:08,285 All right. 999 01:08:10,687 --> 01:08:22,666 Go as far as I can. 1000 01:08:22,699 --> 01:08:23,867 We're on the edge of the Earth. 1001 01:08:25,669 --> 01:08:26,803 And us, 1002 01:08:28,405 --> 01:08:29,139 we're pioneers, man. 1003 01:08:33,943 --> 01:08:35,212 We're on a waterbed. 1004 01:08:40,284 --> 01:08:43,287 Well, that's exactly what we're on. 1005 01:08:46,323 --> 01:08:47,557 We're on a waterbed. 1006 01:08:53,263 --> 01:08:54,864 SAM: Ah, shit. All right. I should've worn fucking hiking boots. 1007 01:08:55,465 --> 01:08:55,865 Got it. 1008 01:08:57,434 --> 01:08:58,535 Get the whole thing. 1009 01:09:00,737 --> 01:09:08,945 All right. We're gonna take a little rest. 1010 01:09:08,978 --> 01:09:10,214 Dad. 1011 01:09:12,482 --> 01:09:14,651 No, it's Sam. 1012 01:09:17,487 --> 01:09:17,854 I was dreaming. 1013 01:09:22,892 --> 01:09:25,229 All right. Go to sleep. It's okay. 1014 01:09:27,797 --> 01:09:30,534 (SHIVERS) 1015 01:10:00,630 --> 01:10:01,765 Oh, fuck. Okay. All right. 1016 01:10:03,300 --> 01:10:04,301 Oliver. Yeah. 1017 01:10:08,372 --> 01:10:10,507 Okay, you ready? You ready? 1018 01:10:12,842 --> 01:10:13,410 (GRUNTING) 1019 01:10:18,582 --> 01:10:19,849 Okay, here we go. Here we go. 1020 01:10:21,050 --> 01:10:21,785 Here we go. 1021 01:10:25,555 --> 01:10:28,858 (HUMMING IRON MAN) 1022 01:10:35,665 --> 01:10:38,602 * Has he lost his mind? 1023 01:10:40,036 --> 01:10:43,407 * Can he see or is he blind? 1024 01:10:44,541 --> 01:10:46,743 (PANTING) 1025 01:10:48,044 --> 01:10:51,381 * Can he walk and talk? 1026 01:10:52,081 --> 01:10:52,549 Fuck it! 1027 01:10:53,583 --> 01:10:55,919 * Can he see or is... 1028 01:10:57,654 --> 01:10:58,322 * He blind? 1029 01:10:59,489 --> 01:11:02,892 * Can he walk and talk 1030 01:11:05,495 --> 01:11:07,297 All right. Come on. Come on, here we go. Come on up. 1031 01:11:08,532 --> 01:11:10,334 Come on. Here we go. Here we go. 1032 01:11:12,402 --> 01:11:13,303 Fuck! (GRUNTS) 1033 01:11:17,341 --> 01:11:17,741 (COUGHS) 1034 01:11:18,842 --> 01:11:19,443 I can't. 1035 01:11:22,846 --> 01:11:24,348 I can't do it. I can't do it. 1036 01:11:28,552 --> 01:11:29,553 (SIGHS) I'm sorry. 1037 01:11:37,894 --> 01:11:38,928 (SHIVERING) 1038 01:12:06,523 --> 01:12:07,457 (WAVES CRASHING) 1039 01:12:13,663 --> 01:12:14,898 (SEAGULLS CALLING) 1040 01:12:19,503 --> 01:12:20,036 You hear that? 1041 01:12:22,806 --> 01:12:24,441 Oliver, check it. Listen. 1042 01:13:08,818 --> 01:13:19,896 (PLAYING DIDGERIDOO) 1043 01:13:19,929 --> 01:13:20,564 Sorry. 1044 01:13:47,991 --> 01:13:48,858 Wasn't me. 1045 01:13:49,826 --> 01:13:50,426 (SCOFFS) 1046 01:13:54,130 --> 01:13:54,764 Gross. 1047 01:14:03,239 --> 01:14:04,207 Hey, I'm sorry I called you a fag. 1048 01:14:44,714 --> 01:14:47,050 Nice. Hey. 1049 01:14:47,651 --> 01:14:48,251 Yo. 1050 01:14:52,288 --> 01:14:55,925 Are you gonna tell my mom what happened? 1051 01:14:55,959 --> 01:14:56,993 Uh, let's see. 1052 01:14:58,628 --> 01:14:59,563 You went for a walk on the beach. 1053 01:15:01,765 --> 01:15:03,600 I went looking for you, I got everybody lost. 1054 01:15:05,301 --> 01:15:05,935 And... 1055 01:15:08,271 --> 01:15:09,773 I don't know. That's pretty much what happened, right? 1056 01:15:09,806 --> 01:15:11,174 I guess. 1057 01:15:18,114 --> 01:15:19,549 So, you know, the whole, like, 1058 01:15:21,818 --> 01:15:23,052 girls or boys thing, it's, like, 1059 01:15:24,988 --> 01:15:25,655 totally normal. 1060 01:15:27,323 --> 01:15:28,091 You're gonna iron it out. 1061 01:15:43,773 --> 01:15:45,041 (INDIE FOLK SONG PLAYING) 1062 01:17:33,316 --> 01:17:36,052 Look, I know, all right. I know. You don't have to say anything. 1063 01:17:38,387 --> 01:17:39,022 What is there to say? 1064 01:17:41,725 --> 01:17:42,658 I'm just grateful no one's dead. 1065 01:17:45,294 --> 01:17:47,030 Yeah, it's not for lack of trying. 1066 01:17:51,768 --> 01:17:54,070 You know, Sam. Actually, it sounds to me like you might have saved his life. 1067 01:17:59,275 --> 01:18:01,745 That's a very generous spin on things, but... 1068 01:18:07,350 --> 01:18:09,719 Yo! What's up, dudes? MAN: Hey, Sam. 1069 01:18:11,320 --> 01:18:12,321 How's it going? Hey, guys. How you doing? It's good. 1070 01:18:14,223 --> 01:18:15,058 So, uh, here's the deal. Okay. 1071 01:18:17,093 --> 01:18:18,962 Before we get all into that stuff. I just want to take a second. 1072 01:18:21,330 --> 01:18:24,300 Kinda just want to apologize to you guys for my behavior 1073 01:18:26,402 --> 01:18:28,037 as of late. I haven't really been, like, a team player. 1074 01:18:29,472 --> 01:18:32,876 And like, I know that, and I just want to say I'm sorry. 1075 01:18:35,178 --> 01:18:35,779 You know. 1076 01:18:37,781 --> 01:18:39,415 (CLEARS THROAT) Well, okay, um... 1077 01:18:41,918 --> 01:18:44,387 What we didn't tell you is that Marcel and Chad and I 1078 01:18:46,055 --> 01:18:47,256 have been working on a side project for about a year now. 1079 01:18:48,324 --> 01:18:50,026 Wait, what? Yeah, and we didn't... 1080 01:18:52,095 --> 01:18:54,063 We didn't tell you because we didn't want to freak you out needlessly, 1081 01:18:54,097 --> 01:18:55,331 but that's the demo that Kline's calling about. 1082 01:18:56,399 --> 01:18:57,100 It's a totally different direction. 1083 01:18:59,102 --> 01:19:02,171 Fleetwood Mac, kinda, you know, coke pop, Tusk. 1084 01:19:05,842 --> 01:19:07,911 And the vibe hasn't been great lately. 1085 01:19:11,414 --> 01:19:11,981 You know? 1086 01:19:19,222 --> 01:19:29,265 Just not feeling it, man. 1087 01:19:29,265 --> 01:19:42,111 Just not feeling it, man. 1088 01:19:42,145 --> 01:19:45,448 OLIVER: Where are you going? 1089 01:19:45,481 --> 01:19:46,883 Think I'm gonna stay with my friend Casey for a bit. 1090 01:19:47,616 --> 01:19:49,819 Did you get a record deal? 1091 01:19:49,853 --> 01:19:51,921 No. They kicked me out of the band. 1092 01:19:55,291 --> 01:19:56,125 Yeah. 1093 01:19:57,293 --> 01:19:58,962 But it's... It's cool, I... 1094 01:20:01,397 --> 01:20:02,031 Yeah. 1095 01:20:03,532 --> 01:20:05,268 You could start a new band. 1096 01:20:05,301 --> 01:20:05,835 Yeah, maybe. 1097 01:20:08,404 --> 01:20:09,338 I don't know. In the long run, though, 1098 01:20:11,440 --> 01:20:15,011 I might be more like a music fan than like a musician, you know. 1099 01:20:16,512 --> 01:20:18,181 You could work in a record shop. 1100 01:20:18,214 --> 01:20:21,584 (CHUCKLES) No, that's definitely not for me. 1101 01:20:24,453 --> 01:20:29,592 It was just a suggestion. 1102 01:20:29,625 --> 01:20:32,228 So, I don't know what kind of plans you have this summer or whatever, but, 1103 01:20:35,031 --> 01:20:37,066 you know, if you wanna, like, hang or something. 1104 01:20:38,935 --> 01:20:39,368 Yeah. 1105 01:20:41,470 --> 01:20:43,006 Uh, see you around? 1106 01:20:44,941 --> 01:20:45,274 Definitely. 1107 01:20:50,413 --> 01:20:51,047 Um... 1108 01:20:52,916 --> 01:20:54,483 I have something stupid for you. 1109 01:20:56,285 --> 01:20:57,020 Found this on the beach. 1110 01:20:59,923 --> 01:21:01,024 It's a sea urchin. 1111 01:21:02,591 --> 01:21:04,127 There was a bunch of shitty broken ones, um, 1112 01:21:05,962 --> 01:21:08,464 but this one was, like, 1113 01:21:08,497 --> 01:21:09,132 whole. 1114 01:21:16,372 --> 01:21:17,106 Well, all right, duder. 1115 01:21:18,674 --> 01:21:21,077 I'll see you 'round the bend. 1116 01:21:25,348 --> 01:21:25,949 Thanks. 1117 01:21:28,651 --> 01:21:31,387 You're welcome. 1118 01:21:31,420 --> 01:21:32,255 Bye. 1119 01:21:33,356 --> 01:21:34,023 Bye. 1120 01:22:44,160 --> 01:22:45,228 (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 1121 01:27:55,571 --> 01:27:55,904 MAN: Action! 1122 01:27:56,905 --> 01:27:58,307 These are my hiking boots. 1123 01:28:01,577 --> 01:28:02,778 Fuck hiking boots. 1124 01:28:06,615 --> 01:28:09,017 Where we're going, we don't need hiking boots. 1125 01:28:12,020 --> 01:28:13,522 Oh, these are my hiking boots. 1126 01:28:17,760 --> 01:28:18,861 These are my hiking boots. 1127 01:28:23,031 --> 01:28:24,967 Who the fuck needs hiking boots? 1128 01:28:26,502 --> 01:28:29,472 MAN: (LAUGHING) Cut! Cut! 79147

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