Original subtitles

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♪

♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ La la la la, la la la la ♪

♪

♪ La la la la ♪

♪

♪ Oh, you plant your seeds down in the dirt ♪

♪ You bury 'em deep so they don't get hurt ♪

♪ You wait a few months ♪

♪ They turn into plants ♪

♪ And that's when you do the little plants dance! ♪

Ha! Hey, that wasn't that bad!

- Hey! -Aah!

You're never gonna believe this!

There's this place across town that sells

this super-fancy ice cream called "frozen yogurt."

They got a sauce that's just birthday cake they put in a blender!

Can we go, Dad?

- Please? Please? Pretty please? -Please? Please?

Come on, please, please, please!

Aw, sorry, kids.

I've got a lot of planting to do before sundown.

But, you know, if we all pitched in and worked together, we could--

Nah, I'll just ask Gramma to drive us.

Ooh, I don't know about that.

I haven't seen her drive in a while, so it might not be the best idea--

- Hey! I heard that. -Ooh!

Come on, kids.

Let Gramma take you for a spin.

- Yay! -Hey, wait!

Fine! Enjoy your yogurt.

I'm gonna stay here and fill up on hard work!

And... here we are!

Uh, Gramma, what are we doing in the old garage?

Dad's truck is in the front yard.

We're not taking that hunk of junk!

We're riding...

in style.

Wow, Gramma, I didn't know you had a car.

There's a lot you don't know about me, boy!

I was the queen of the track.

Hot Rod Alice, they called me.

I was unstoppable!

So that's where I inherited my need for speed.

Darn right!

Now, let's go get that 'gurt!

Yeah!

Yogurt! Yogurt! Yogurt!

Aah! You okay, Gramma?

That dang fool came out of nowhere!

You all saw it.

I sure saw it, and felt it, too!

Looks like we've gotten ourselves into a delicious little T-bone here.

Ma'am, I'm gonna need to see your license, please.

Hmm! There. Read it and weep.

Oh, my! Your license expired before I was even born.

Looks like you'll have to get a new one!

Oh, well, what a shame, Officer.

There must be something you can do to help out a girl in need.

--Ugh.

Huh, I'm afraid not, Ms. Green.

You see, a license like this has no purpose any more.

It's old. It's useless.

Oh, look! It's actually turning to dust right before our eyes.

Anywhoo, ticket time!

Ms. Green, if you ever want to get behind the wheel again,

you'll have to retake the driver's test.

Okay, now I'm gonna go call

a tow truck for and an ambulance for me!

Ha-ha ow!

--Easy, now!

You be careful with her!

You scratch my paint, I'll have your hide!

Listen, Ma, you don't need your license.

Now that we all live together,

I can drive you wherever you need to go,

so you can just sit here and do nothin'.

I'm gonna go with the tow truck guy.

I'll be back later.

Ah, don't listen to Dad.

I bet you'll ace that driver's test.

You'll be back on the road in no time.

I ain't takin' that test!

That Officer Keys is a tyrant!

I got nothin' to prove to him or anyone else!

Wow. Gramma's really mad.

She's even grinding her teeth.

Why's she so upset?

Maybe she just needs a confidence boost.

Hmm. Tilly, you're right, and I know just how to do it!

Hey, Gramma.

There's something outside I need to show you.

Oh, Tilly, did you turn the backyard into a rat circus again?

Nope. This is even better.

What the--?

Hello, Gramma!

And welcome to Cricket's Crash Course

for Learning How to Not Crash Cars!

We're gonna help you pass that driver's test,

and you'll be learning on this baby "rightch" here.

Boy, where'd you get all those traffic cones?

Oh, you know, around.

--Look out!

Well, put 'em back!

I already know how to drive,

and I sure as heck don't need to take lessons

from a couple of imps!

- Tilly, can you handle this, please? -Of course.

Hmm?

Oh, man, just look at this, Gramma!

You're tearing your granddaughter apart!

Mm... all right, fine!

I'll do the dang course.

Just knock it off, Tilly!

Okay.

All right, Ms. Green, let's take this nice and slow.

Go ahead and shift into "turtle" for me.

Ooh, come on, Alice.

Pull yourself together.

Very good. Now, head towards those cones.

Easy, easy.

We're turning, still turning.

And boom! There we go.

Hmm, all right. This ain't too bad.

Uh-huh. Very good. Very-- Tilly, now!

Oh, no! I lost control of my baby!

- Mama! -Unh!

Nice work! You never know

what you're gonna encounter on the road.

Oh, no, my baby's now a teenager

and is going through a rebellious phase!

Unh!

Nice work, Gramma!

And now it's just slow and steady to the finish line.

Eh, I got a better idea.

A race to the finish!

Gramma, no! Aah!

Oh! Tuck and roll, Cricket, aah!

Oh, Alice.

Tilly, what were you thinking?

This wasn't part of the plan.

The road holds many unexpected surprises.

Some things are meant to be run over.

Happy Halloween!

Hmm. Well, I have to applaud your enthusiasm, Tilly.

Okay, Gramma, ready to try again? Gramma?

Hey, where you goin'? We're not finished.

Well, I am. I'm finished.

Poor Gramma.

Huh. Givin' up isn't like her at all.

I think it's time we took this plan from turtle to rabbit.

Hey, Gramma, I got something I need to--

No, Cricket, I'm done with drivin'!

No more crazy schemes.

All right. If that's how you truly feel...

Gah! Got your glasses!

Huh? I can't see nothin'!

Where'd you go, you little gremlin?

Over here, Gramma! This way!

Come on! Hurry up, Gramma!

Wait till I get my hands on you!

What's going on? Where am I?

Class is back in session.

What is it-- Bill's truck?

You tricked me!

I'm real sorry about that, Gramma.

I guess you'll just have to take the wheel and drive.

- No! -What do you mean, no?

Nobody tricks me and tells me what to do!

Uh-oh.

- Hmph! -Whee!

Gramma, come on! You gotta take the wheel!

Nuh-uh.

--Hey, watch it, pal!

- Randall? -Phyllis!

Look, Gramma, I'm sorry I tricked you, okay?

We just wanted to help you get your confidence back

so you could pass that dang test.

♪ I love selling hot dogs ♪

♪ No! ♪

Aw, poor hot-dog man.

Come on, Gramma, just drive already!

What's wrong with you? You're Hot Rod Alice, for goodness sake.

Why won't you drive?

'Cause I'm scared, Cricket!

Okay? I'm scared!

What? You're scared?

I'm scared of getting old,

I'm scared of becoming useless,

and I'm scared that if I fail that driver's test,

it'll prove just that.

I-- I didn't know you felt that way.

It's okay, Gramma.

Lots of things scare me, too,

like that gate we're about to smash through.

The what? Aah!

No, no, no-- Aww!

Well, at least we stopped movin'.

I think we're finally safe.

-- Ouchy-wa-wa!

Looks like cars five and two just munched bumpers

and narrowly avoided hitting that unmarked pickup truck,

which doesn't seem to be on my list,

but, hey, we didn't get

into the demolition derby business

to worry about tiny details.

Now, let's see if they've got what it takes

to survive the menacing clutches of...

Crunch-a-saurus Rex!

Whoo!

Marry me, Crunch-a-saurus!

- Oh, no. -Would you look at that!

One dinosaur about to eat another.

How fitting.

Listen, I know you're scared of gettin' old,

but you can't just give up!

That's not who you are.

You might not be Hot Rod Alice anymore,

but that's okay, because you're something even better:

- Our gramma. -Our Hot Rod Gramma!

Oh, kids, come here.

This one's going down!

Holy crunch-a-munga!

Looks like the diesel dino has found its next victim.

Eat their souls, Crunch-a-saurus!

That's it!

No more mopin' around!

Time to show everyone what Hot Rod Gramma can do!

Crunch-a-saurus, no!

Crunchy, no!

My beautiful metal boy!

Go, Gramma!

Told you I know how to drive.

Step on it, Gramma!

I've got a better idea.

That's a little something I call the Turtle Maneuver.

Learned it from the best.

Now, let's go home!

Yay!

There. Good as new.

Next I just gotta fix the tractor, my truck,

and everything else that Ma broke.

I heard that!

Gramma! You're back!

How'd the driver's test go, Hot Rod?

Well, naturally your old grandma aced it with flying colors.

Of course, I can't drive on freeways

or after dark, but I still got it!

Now, who wants frozen yogurt?

- I'll drive. -Yeah!

Well, with all the work to do still,

it sure would go a lot faster if we all--

Nah. Bye, Dad!

Well, at least I got you to help me out.

Happy Halloween!

Uh... sure. Happy Halloween.

HB

- Hey! - Whoo!

Look, I don't know how you pay for things

back in Hickville or wherever,

but a little dance ain't gonna buy yourself a burrito.

I bet you'd trade for an ear of golden corn

from my dad's garden.

Kid, do I look stupid?

Uh, a little bit. What the heck?!

Stop right there.

Oh, hey, kids.

Meet my new friends from Animal Control!

My, my, what large weapons you have.

Howdy, officers.

Animal Control? What do you do?

We control animals.

Hey, that trash is city property!

Sorry about that, citizen.

Looks like we've mistook you

for the wild bear that's on the loose.

- A bear?! - That's right.

A terrifying grizzly bear has been sighted in Big City,

and it has to be caught!

You're talking to the right guy. I hate bears.

They're monsters and nothing would make me happier

than bringing one to justice.

If you see any trace of the beast...

call me!

I knew the day would come

where I would have to hunt down a giant grizzly.

I just never thought it would be so soon.

Now who wants to capture bear?

Yeah! Wait, why? Why would we do that?

Cricket has never found bears agreeable.

You're dang right! Bears are a menace.

They'll terrorize the innocent, rifle through our garbage,

and, if left unchecked,

will eventually destroy this good city!

Really? You must have dealt with a lot of bears

back in the country, huh?

Remy, I've never been met a bear in my life,

and for that, I consider myself lucky.

You don't need to meet a bear to know they're awful.

Well, sounds good to me.

Now let's go catch ourselves a bear!

Hello, I'd like guacamole on my burrito!

What? Hmm.

- Whoa! - Gotcha, bear.

Oh, whoops, just another jogger.

Sorry about that, sir.

I think this ought to make us square.

Your silence is appreciated.

You know what they say. 12th times the charm.

That's the spirit, Remy.

Now let's get back into position.

Hmm, this is a fuzzy tree.

Huh?

Oh, my gosh. You found the bear.

Oh, my gosh! I found the bear!

Agh! Oh, it's gonna eat me! I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead!

Look away! I don't want you to see this!

- Cricket!

What's going on? Playing with your food, huh?

Well, I'm taking myself off the menu!

How do you like that?!

Whoa!

Put 'em up, put 'em up!

I got you right where I want you.

How you like that?!

I'm crushing the wind out of your chest!

I did it!

Yay! According to the law,

you are now my prisoner, bear.

I'll hold her. Call it in, brother.

There, there.

Hello, animal control? I'm about to make your day.

You know that renegade bear?

I happen to have it in my custody.

Oh, shoot, she's getting away, Cricket!

- Hey, bear, no escaping! - Kid! What's happening?!

Hey, where do you think you're going?

Oh, Cricket. She just wants a burrito.

Every prisoner deserves a last meal.

Cricket, that's crazy! This is a wild animal!

I think she's just misunderstood.

She's probably just new around these parts like us.

Hmm, I am a firm warden but a fair one.

I will grant the prisoner one last meal.

Ah! And let's make it quick.

Huh?

One of your finest burritos, please.

Take them all!

Wow. Thanks.

Thank you very much for the burritos, Daisy.

Jeez, Tilly. Don't give it a name.

It's a bear, not our friend.

Okay, I can't watch this. Let me do it.

Stupid bear. Oh.

You like fish burritos, too. I thought I was the only one.

Okay, you got your meal.

Now it's time you got to Animal Control.

- But, Cricket, she's parched.

Yeah, I guess she is looking a little thirsty.

All right, fine, you softies.

Now hurry it up. Ain't got all day.

What a dummy. Hmm?

Okay, it's time to turn you in.

Oh, so soon?

Yeah, you know, she's kind of cute.

Well, maybe after a few more last requests.

♪ And you ♪

That's us, everyone! Thank you and good night!

Please, please, you're too kind.

Ooh! What should we sing next?

Ooh, how about something with a little country twang?

I see, a music snob.

Well, we'll see about that. Cootchie-cootchie-coo.

- Bear pile!

Freeze! Put your paws in the air.

Oh, my word, were too late!

It's eating those kids!

- All right! - Shotgun!

We can't thank you enough, kid.

It was actually thanks to your tip earlier

that we were able to catch this brute.

Ha! Funny how things work out.

Oh, sure. No problem.

This is exactly what I wanted.

Be gentle with her!

She can't get to sleep unless you sing to her!

She loves being scratched behind the ears!

And I'm pretty sure her favorite food is fish burritos!

Cricket, was this the right thing to do?

I think so, Tilly. But then why does my heart hurt?

After all, she was just a bear.

Oh, who am I kidding?

Daisy was more than a bear. She was our friend.

And friends don't leave of friends in cold,

animal-sized prison cells.

Coo-ka-coo!

That's our signal.

A fried egg is not poached. They're so different!

Huh?

Why?

Oh, my gosh, we hit a kid!

Rupert! You told me you were gonna dance on the big stage!

You can't give up now!

Wait, Tilly, this isn't what we practiced at all.

I'm a free spirit. Try to keep up.

- Your father the Duke never approved of us! - Still dying! Oh!

What is this?

I don't know, but I can't look away.

Daisy! You're okay!

Good to see you, too.

Ow, okay, that hurts more than it tackles.

The wedding is cancelled!

They were so young.

Hey, do you guys smell pumpkin?

Actually, it's spaghetti squash.

That small man is right!

Hey, get back here!

Uh-oh. Time to go.

Don't let that bear get away!

- That went well. - I have some notes.

Daisy, look out for those joggers!

I'm back to selling burritos.

Ain't nothing gonna stop me now.

No!!

They're gaining on us!

We're going around!

Aw, Daisy, I didn't mean for it all to go down like this.

I used to think bears were uncivilized,

savage hair monsters, but you're pretty great.

You know, you and I aren't so different.

A lot of people say I don't belong in the city.

So if you want to stay here, then I got your back.

But what's the best hiding spot for a city bear?

Hey, what are you doing?

Daisy, where do you think you're going?

You can't live in the sewer.

Wait a second, there's food here.

It's damp like a cave, and there's even running water.

Well, if this is where you want to stay, Daisy, it's fine by me.

I mean, I wish I could stay with you,

but with you living in a sewer and all,

it's just kind of gross.

So I guess this is goodbye.

Okay, well I guess you'd better get out of here

before one of us starts crying.

Heh, Cricket Green helping a bear.

What a crazy world.

End of the line, young man. Let's nab ourselves a bear!

Oh, you want a bear, do you? Well, you're in luck!

Y'all got yourselves a sewer bear now!

Oh, my.

Hoo boy!

Well, I hope you're happy, kid.

Not only did we lose the bear's trail,

but my new boots are completely ruined!

Pack it up, boys, we're getting out of here.

You hear that, girl? We did it.

And with little to no consequences, too.

Huh. That can't be good.

Yep, that's a fever, all right.

Well, that's what you get for playing in the sewer.

Ah, nothing some of my famous chili can't fix.

We're proud of you, Cricket. You did a good thing.

Thanks, guys.

- Are you contagious? - Oh, very much so.

"My dearest, Daisy,

I hope this letter finds you well

and that happiness and security are within your grasp.

Until we meet again, here's a little gift from me.

Your friend, Cricket Green.

What the-- Cricket!

CHHB

♪ Lost a bet and got bit by 100 flies ♪

♪ I fell out a big old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch and scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by dogs ♪

♪ Bit by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my leg ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters since 7 to 10:00 ♪

♪ And tomorrow, I'll do it all again ♪