Original subtitles

Presents

A Film by Jan Jakub Kolski

to my mother

Silence.

S-I-I-e-n-0-e.

Silence in this place always pissed me off.

It just drove me... crazy.

Nothing, but the singing of birds,

the murmuring of the brooklet, and the soughing of the wind.

And, finally,

the barking of dogs,

though even they would bark fucking softly,

as if they were afraid of something.

After all they were afraid of something.

Just like me.

Now I'm returning to this fucking silence,

luckily just for a while.

For a couple of days.

Starring

Drive on, fuck you!

Makeup

Costume designer

Art Directors

Edited by

Sound

Production Manager

Music

Oh, fuck it...

Director of Photography

Producer

Written and Directed by

TO KILL A BEAVER

I'll kill you.

I'll kill you all.

I'm here waiting.

PS. Thanks for the beaver trap.

I could use it.

Eryk speaking.

I'm calling.

I hearyou.

I've sent two pictures. You figure it out...

Aha.

How are you?

I'm keeping fine.

And the war against beavers? Who's winning?

Got any other questions?

European beaver - castor fiber.

An endangered species.

And you?

An endangered species too,

or want your ass belted?

Will you beat me?

I'll catch you.

But I'm not going to run away.

Do you know

you're on my turf,

like that castor something?

I do.

And what?

Well, I count on your being a hospitable individual.

Not very.

Got that? Beat it!

I get it.

Why don't you move your little ass

- and drift toward your junior high? - I'm in senior high already.

You must have straight As in the beaver class.

I have straight As only.

I know, for instance, that you'll go to jail for what you're doing.

Even faster for murdering a high school student.

Do you have a name?

I do.

Ido!

And you?

I don't.

Don't tell me you're calling.

I don't.

What is it'?

Have you collected pebbles?

What's the hurry'?

I thought you were in a hurry.

Not yet.

I'm sending a clue.

I don't need any fucking clue!

Don't be scared to look into a woman's eyes.

So I gotcha.

You moron. You blockhead.

Eryk.

You've flipped out, friend?

What? Has anybody fired?

An idiot, but certainly not you.

The beavers pissed me off.

Eryk, we are no more.

Nobody will acknowledge us just in case.

I'm no more.

You vanish off the face of the earth and... dead silence.

I said I'm no more.

What're you fucking doing?

You enter my life, as if it were a john.

As if to take a dump,

wash your hands and leave.

But I'm a complex... man.

I have my various secrets and want them to remain my own.

This is my only real property.

Do you understand what I'm saying to you?

Uh-huh. You got a gun.

I do.

- You kill people? - I don't kill anybody.

- I have various secrets too. - Yeah, right.

Barbie doll room upstairs,

books, panties, socks.

Uh-huh. I have my little room here,

- penetrate the wall, living in it. - No.

It's me who has this little house here.

I lock the door and want to be alone.

Understand?

- So I can drop by once in a while. - No.

Don't come here. OK?

And the beavers? Who'll help you take a shine to them?

I won't.

Why, they're nice, furry and touching. Just like cuddly toys.

I won't ever like them.

- Won't you get away? - No.

Aren't you scared?

I am.

So what's the point? You got me confused.

I've fallen in love.

- With me? - With you.

A fucking awful investment of your feelings.

- You couldn't have done worse. - One can.

You don't even know how many morons walk the face of the earth.

All right.

You've convinced me.

Pick up snails.

What for?

For dinner.

What am I to do with it'?

Smash up the dam.

What're you waiting for?

Destroy it.

No.

- Smash it to fucking pieces. - No.

Love...

must be able to make sacrifices.

- Smash it up! - No.

At once!

Let those cuddly critters see how much you're in love.

- Smash it! - No!

- Do it! - No.

To fucking pieces.

No!

You love me so much, huh?

No!

Thai Shrimp... hot.

Roast Chicken... mild.

Crabmeat... hot.

Chicken Curry.

Roast chicken is OK.

- For sure? - For sure.

Clothes.

Still in love?

Still.

You know how I love you is in Russian?

I do.

Five hundred in the kisser, a grand into the twat.

Ya lyublyoo tebya.

Repeat.

What for?

Repeat... Please.

Ya lyublyoo tebya.

You see?

You must really love me.

- I falter less around you. - You don't falter at all.

SHY,

"Milenkiy moy, shchastye mayo,

dusha grustit za toboy.

Milenkiy moy, shchastye moye...

Mayo.

Milenkiy moy, shchastye mayo, dusha grustit za toboy.

Very beautiful.

Beautiful.

Something broke in the car?

No. I'm looking for my daughter. A short one, dyed hair.

- Hasn't she roamed here? - No.

You... the owner?

Aha. The owner.

- Anything else? - That's all.

If she'd wander here, smack her on the ass. May I oblige you?

Sure.

So that's all.

Still in love?

Remember:

Ya lyublyoo tebya?

Repeat:

Ya lyublyoo tebya.

Ya lyublyoo tebya.

Milenkiy moy, shchastye mayo,

dusha grustit za toboy.

Milenkiy moy, shchastye mayo,

dusha grustit za toboy.

Milenkiy moy.

All in order.

I took money from the drawer, as you'd disappeared somewhere.

And I've bought some things.

Don't worry nobody knows a thing. Zero information outside.

I've caught on that the less and quieter with you the more I get.

Oh, how I've concluded it beautifully.

Obyed.

Nastoyashchiy obyed...

Dinner.

Hmmm. Haven't you grown fond of Russian?

A beautiful language.

Does lyubov suit you?

Can we call it love?

No.

We cannot.

Kuriniy bulion.

Adbivnaya kotleta...

z kartoshkoy.

Salat iz ogurtsev.

Ma rkovka

Chicken noodle

- delicious.

Noodles.

Flour, eggs.

Carrot. A good Polish carrot.

Parsley... dill leaves.

This is a pork chop

of a swine.

Thank