Original subtitles

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(SCREAMING)

MAN: Get out of here.

(GROWLING)

Look out.

No mercy for the human slime, my simian warriors.

We take this world today.

Fight! Fight for Gorilla City and simian kind everywhere.

STARGIRL: That's a lot of gorillas.

Specifics, Stargirl. You are evaluating an active threat to the UN.

Oh, great. (CHUCKLES)

Okay, there are like 30 to 40 gorillas attacking

the United Nations building with ray guns.

Probably minions of that bad gorilla in the jail files I had to read.

- Gorilla Gropp or something. - Grodd.

Relax, Stargirl. You are doing great.

Remember, every leaguer had a first day.

Everything will be just fine.

Tell that to the UN delegates about to be abducted

by a super intelligent megalomaniacal gorilla.

Remember your training.

Be efficient. Ruthless.

Neutralize your foe.

And have fun.

It's important to enjoy your work.

The puny humans are inferior in both mind and body.

We will crush them beneath our feet.

Hands.

Crush beneath your hands, because you have hands on your feet.

That's what you get for fighting with these peacekeepers.

- (GRUNTS) - Ah...

Sorry, Batman.

Apologize later.

Situational awareness now.

This is mostly just a ride along, Stargirl.

To see firsthand how a couple of vets handle a routine situation.

Routine?

The end of human domination of Earth.

You call this routine?

I call it a light morning workout.

With no cardio.

Execute caged heat.

Yah.

(SCREAMS)

That was more fun than a barrel of monkeys Grodd. But now you're done.

Done?

Are you kidding me?

Mr. Mxyzptlk.

He's so cute!

What's a mxy...

How could you not know me? You are breaking my heart.

I thought you had memorized all the Justice League dossiers I gave you.

I have been cramming like crazy.

I learned all about the atomic guy with two personalities,

and backward talking lady magician.

But when I read this guy's name on the file,

I thought it was just a typo.

Hey, watch it, girl.

I'm the funny one here.

Don't underestimate him.

Mxyzptlk is an alien imp from the fifth dimension

with powers beyond our understanding,

and a pathological desire to create chaos.

That's mischief.

Mr. Bats in the belfry.

Mischief.

Let me give you an example.

The only way to stop his nonsense is to get him to say his name backwards.

Watch this, kid.

(GROWLING)

Hey mister, looks like you are a little mxyed up.

Mixed up!

Say, that's not a bad idea.

In fact, it sounds like fun.

STARGIRL: Uh, hey, what's up with my man hands.

SUPERMAN: Great Scot! I am in Batman's suit.

(BATMAN'S VOICE) Not just my suit, Superman.

Mxyzptlk played musical chairs with our minds.

But we've still got to stop those gorillas no matter what condition we are in.

(STARGIRL'S VOICE) You don't have to tell me twice.

(SCREAMS)

Stargirl.

Oh, shoot. I forgot.

No flying for me.

(GROANS) Oh.

Everything smarts.

Even Batman's boots are too tight.

All right, let's see how this thing works.

Ah! Whoa!

(GROANS)

Not so fast, you.

Ow.

That hurt.

Superman, are you okay?

Ow, my hand.

Sorry. Sorry.

My bad. (GIGGLES)

My heat vision. Shut it off.

I don't know how.

Think cold thoughts.

Icicles, Minnesota.

Batman's disapproving stare.

If I knew it was going to be this entertaining,

I would have sprung for the good seats.

(GRUNTS)

We can't let this body switch throw us off our game.

You seem to be doing fine in my body.

I have never relied on superpowers, Stargirl.

Only skill.

I still know how to throw a punch.

Oh, argh.

(LAUGHS)

It appears the Justice League is having an identity crisis.

We will never have a better opportunity to crush them.

Crush this, Grodd.

How's this come off?

Got it.

Watch out for those bat bombs.

They have a hair trigger.

(GROANS)

Good safety tip, Batman.

This body switch doesn't seem to have diminished your effectiveness.

I know.

Isn't that great?

I am so excited about it.

Er... Are you like, okay, Batman?

Batman is used to fighting multiple foes,

but not with the volatile emotions of a teenage girl.

What's that supposed to mean?

Why is everyone staring at me?

I've waited a long time for this victory, Batman, Superman, whatever.

You will have to wait a bit longer, Grodd.

Thanks to Batman's batarang.

Missed.

Well, there's an entire bat arsenal on this belt to take care of... Ah!

Whoa...

I think I have super allergies.

Gesundheit. (LAUGHING)

This is too much!

I can't even... I can't even...

This isn't working.

We got to deal with Mxyzptlk before we deal with Grodd's army.

I think we should call in the cavalry.

We need backup.

Firestorm especially.

But won't Mxyzptlk just...

Excellent, Stargirl.

Batman to Justice League. Send Bravo Squad to my location.

Bring Firestorm.

Repeat. Bring Firestorm...

(GRUNTS)

You have lost.

The world is ours.

Ready.

Aim.

Hey, Grodd.

Where does an 800 pound gorilla sit?

Answer, anywhere the Justice League tells him to, yo.

I don't mean to toot my horn, but I'm gonna toot it.

That was a pretty gangster hero arrival line, huh?

- Dr. Stein. - Ronald.

I believe we have discussed how your grandstanding

exacerbates your acute narcissism.

I won't let you heroes spoil the fun.

Say hello to The Big Wheel of Body Switching.

Get ready. And remember, this is only an exhibition, not a competition.

Please, no wagering.

(LAUGHING)

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

That's pretty.

Whoa.

Whoa...

Hey, look, Professor. I am Shazam.

(THUNDER CRASHES)

Ugh, I am not Shazam.

No, I am Shazam.

(SCREAMING)

This is a disaster.

Yes. For Mr. Mxyzptlk.

Observe.

Oh, this is rich.

I can play this game for millennia.

If my tokus didn't get tired.

(LAUGHING)

Hmm, interesting.

Inappropriate laughter can be a symptom of hypomania...

What? Who said that?

I did. Dr. Martin Stein.

One half of the hero Firestorm.

How did you get in my head?

Get out of here!

Oh, you are an anthropophomaniac. That's fear of other people.

I begin to understand you.

What are you? The ghost of my shrinks?

Stop psychoanalyzing me.

You sound like a hallunologophogomaniac.

That's one who fears complex scientific terminology.

Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

Or perhaps you are akiltensystem.

- (HORN BLOWING) - Get this through your head.

I am not a hypomaniac,

an anthropophomaniac,

or a kiltedsystem.

Oh, snap.

I said it, didn't I?

(SCREAMS)

ALL: Whoa!

Ah.

Now, my legions.

We'll destroy the befuddled Justice League,

once and for all.

RONALD: Er... I'm not feeling very befuddled.

At least, not anymore than usual, Ronald?

Oh...

Stargirl, I just wanted to commend you on your quick thinking.

Knowing that Firestorm was a dual personality,

you surmised that the additional consciousness

would make its way into Mxyzptlk's head.

Good job, rookie.

That wasn't actually your plan.

Was it?

Frankly, I kind of wanted to meet him.

(CHUCKLING)

It will be our secret.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)