Original subtitles

[♪♪♪]

Drink up, darling,

and old Roge'll open up another bottle of champagne.

It's almost 3:00 in the morning.

In China, it's noon.

We're not in China.

However, my uncle just may send you there

if you don't get me home.

He's going to be furious.

Don't panic, darling.

Doesn't he know you're out with me?

That's why he's going to be furious.

Did you like the scampi?

It was divine.

[SIGHS] It was nothing.

I didn't know you liked to fool around in the kitchen.

Mmm.

With a little encouragement,

I can be a lot of fun in the living room too.

It is exactly 3:04.

I'll tell you what, darling.

One more sip and then, uh--

then I'll take you home, okay?

Hmm? One more sip? Okay.

One more. One more sip.

[CHUCKLES]

Don't go away.

Hey, Jeannie.

Hey, Jeannie, everything's working out great.

Oh.

Jeannie, you can come out now.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Tony, T-Tony.

What were you doing in the bottle?

I sent Jeannie home. Shh. Not so loud.

You can't do that. I'm not through with her.

Oh, yes, you are.

When I said you could borrow Jeannie,

I didn't know what I was letting that poor girl in for.

Now look, you haven't given her a moment's rest.

Maybe I did get a little carried away,

but I've never had a 24-course meal before.

Tomorrow night I'll have her do a cheese sandwich.

Forget it, Roge. Forget it. I mean, the party's over.

You see, I'm not loaning Jeannie to you anymore.

[LOUDLY] If there's one thing--

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a selfish astronaut.

What if I found her inside that bottle on the beach?

Good night, Roge.

I'll let myself out the back way.

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

Someone's got to set Dr. Bellows'

clock back three hours.

You said Jeannie was going to set it back for me.

You know what? What?

You got big problems, buddy. Jeannie's asleep.

Good night.

[♪♪♪]

You're doing fine, Captain Healey, just fine.

Now, shall we try it again?

If the big hand is pointing straight up

and the little hand is pointing out that way, what time is it?

Three o'clock, sir.

Right you are, captain. And would you believe it,

my watch looked just like this

when you brought my niece home last night.

Yes, but I can explain that, sir. Uh--

I issued a directive last week

in regard to a voluntary curfew for all astronauts.

To facilitate certain tests, and to safeguard your health,

I asked you gentlemen to be in by 11 p.m.

Why did you ignore the directive?

Uh, well, you see, uh, your niece--

Your niece and I were involved in a heated discussion.

Only three guesses per astronaut.

Yes, sir.

Blatant disobedience. No excuse, sir.

Ah.

Concise, to the point, and right on target.

Captain, I've decided that you need a vacation.

Vacation, sir? Well, you're very kind, sir,

but I've got a lot of work piled up and I really--

Take it along with you.

It'll give you something to do for the next 30 days.

Have I-- Have I decided where I'm going on my vacation, sir?

Indeed you have.

You are headed for Andromeda Inlet.

Andromeda Inlet?

[SIGHS]

Anyway, that's-- That's what Dr. Bellows says.

Uh, I can't even find it.

It's a remote island somewhere in the Celebes.

I'm serving 30 days as a lone Army observer

in the Navy's Neptune Project.

Ah, unless--

Forget it! Forget it!

Jeannie is not gonna help you.

Aw, be reasonable. One blink from her

and Dr. Bellows would change his mind.

You've gotta ask her to help me out.

Roger, she's worn out. I don't even let her help me.

I forgot my briefcase this morning

and I'm going to go back myself and pick it up.

You forgot your briefcase, master.

Oh, Jeannie, you didn't have to do that.

You better rest.

But while you're here, I have a little problem.

Dr. Bellows is going to send me away.

Oh, that is terrible.

You see? She understands.

May I help your unfortunate friend?

My unfortunate friend

is just going to have to learn to help himself.

And that's final, Roge.

No, if he wants any more magic,

he'll have to find his own genie.

Oh, that is an excellent idea, master.

May I summon my cousin Marilla?

Who? What?

My cousin, Marilla.

She was a genie when I left Baghdad 2000 years ago.

Oh, I'm sure she would love to serve Captain Healey.

Marilla?

My own genie? No! No, Roge--

How long would it take her to get here

if she hopped on a rug this afternoon?

Oh, it would take her no time at all.

N-- Roger, I said no and I mean no.

All we need is another one of her running around.

One genie in Cocoa Beach is quite enough.

Master, if I may not help him,

may I please ask you to help him?

Jeannie, look, I don't want to have to--

Well, maybe I was a little...

too rough on him, huh?

Okay, I'll fix it.

Alrighty.

Hello. Dr. Bellows please.

Oh, hello, Dr. Bellows.

This is Captain Nelson here.

Yes, I wonder if you could do me a little favor, sir.

Ah. There we are.

I'll be gone for about a month, Mr. Billings.

I'd sure appreciate it if you'd kind of

keep things straightened up here.

No trouble at all, captain.

Uh, would you mind feeding my fish?

You know, changing the water.

Captain Healey, you're talking to an American citizen,

right? Right.

What kind of patriot says no to an astronaut?

Oh, thank you very much, Mr. Billings.

Well, uh, don't forget to take care of the fish.

I gotta go over to the base and check out.

[♪♪♪]

Well, this is the apartment.

Right.

This place is gonna work out great.

Oh, well, I'll say.

We'll rehearse all week, we'll get the act in shape

and then maybe we can get some bookings.

Oh, I meant to tell you.

Watch with the pigeons and the rabbits

when you open the front door. Why?

Well, the owner don't allow no pets in the building.

Quiet as mice.

Good. Good.

And, uh...

if you need anything, holler.

Oh, uh, Arnie,

do you still cut Myrt in half with the band saw?

Oh, yeah. That's our flash finish.

Well, if you try it out up here,

make sure that the shades are pulled down, will you?

Well, it's our joint for 30 days.

Let's say we open the trunk.

Here's one. Here's one. My favorite trick.

Ladies and gentlemen, "Magic Factory."

Hello? What's the matter with this?

Ow!

It's all right. It worked this morning.

Get the--

[MUTTERING]

Captain Healey, what are you doing here?

I came back to pick up some notes I forgot.

[♪♪♪]

Oh, that's smashing, that's smashing.

That's great, great.

Marilla.

Marilla.

Jeannie, you did it.

You sent me Marilla.

You sent me Marilla and a--

And a friend.

Oh!

Uh, you have my permission to speak.

Uh, your na--

What's your name?

I'm kno--

I'm known as Abdul the Great.

Oh, pretty pleased to meet you, I'm sure.

Nice meeting you.

Do you mind if I just call you Abdul?

No, no.

You can call me "master."

BOTH: Master.

Boy, oh, boy, am I glad to see you two.

Yeah?

You mean you aren't mad about us being here?

You'll let us stay here for the whole 30 days?

Thirty days? I'm never gonna let you go.

Look, you two sure got here in a hurry.

You must've had that magic carpet of yours

opened full throttle all the way from Baghdad, huh?

[ALL LAUGH]

Well, have you--? Have you talked to Jeannie yet?

Jeannie?

What do you call your cousin?

I call him Harry.

[MOUTHS] Harry.

I don't remember any Harry,

but she sure thinks a lot of you.

She thinks you're one of the greatest genies in the business.

She does?

Yeah, if you're half the genie Jeannie is

I'm gonna be a happy astronaut.

You, uh-- You folks work the same way?

You know:

Is that the way you do it?

Is that--?

Is that the way we do what?

I see I asked the wrong question, huh?

Huh? Okay. Professional secret?

Okay, you don't ask me how to fly a space capsule,

and I won't ask you how you do your work.

Is that fair enough?

Oh, uh...

anything you say, uh...

master.

"Master." "Master."

You don't know what the word does for me.

That makes me feel 12 feet tall.

It does?

And you just don't send

that big man to Andromeda Inlet.

No, sirree.

Not when the little man who issues the orders

is going to change his mind.

And that's exactly what you're going to do for Dr. Bellows.

You better get on it right away.

The plane I won't be on leaves in half an hour.

Look, just make yourself at home here,

and if you have any questions,

I'll be over at Captain Nelson's, okay?

You two can just, uh...

pop in.

Pop in.

I--

I suppose it figures, doesn't it?

What does?

A fellow walks all those miles out in space,

something's gotta happen, isn't it?

[SINGING IN FOREIGN DIALECT]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

I'll get it.

[SIGHS]

Yes?

Oh, hi, Roge.

Good morning. Good morning.

Ah, there's the little old miracle worker.

Oh, what is this?

A little token of my appreciation.

Boy, you really go all out.

I asked for one and she sends two.

Two what?

Abdul the Great, and I mean great.

Boy, you should see him.

I'd like to. What does he do?

Well, I don't know what his specialty is.

He's kind of an all-around man.

Handyman?

I suppose you could say that.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Oh, uh, Jeannie, do you mind?

Thank you.

Boy, I can't wait to see Abdul do that.

What are you talking about?

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Oh, Dr. Bellows. Oh, excuse me.

I saw Captain Healey's car outside and I--

Oh.

Captain Healey.

I, um-- I wanted to give you the good news myself.

You're not sending me away, right?

That's right.

I've decided that you're needed here.

And this decision came as quite a surprise to you, didn't it?

Roge, you're feeling all right, right?

I never felt better in my life.

Look, don't worry about a thing.

You're not going to have any more trouble with me

because I'm not going to have any more trouble with you.

Right? Okay?

'Cause all you need is the right friends, right?

Right. Look, I'll say hello to your niece for you

and say goodbye to you-know-who.

Goodbye.

[♪♪♪]

You know, I'm really worried about Roger.

He's acting like a wild man.

Did you hear him tell Dr. Bellows off this morning?

Hm.

He sounds as if he's got you behind him.

He sounds--

Jeannie, you're not helping Roger, are you?

Of course not, master. I promised that I would not.

All right.

Mm-mm.

I better give him a call.

Oh, thanks.

I could've done that, you know.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello.

Ehhh, who's this?

This is Ma--

Marilla.

Is this you, master?

"Is this me, master"?

Jeannie. Jeannie, you lied to me.

Oh, but I do not lie.

Hey, are you there?

Who is it, Myrt?

I don't know. They won't answer.

[STUTTERING] I have your cousin on the phone.

Do you want to talk to her? My cousin?

Yeah, you know, Marilla. Remember?

But I did not--

Hello. Marilla?

Yeah, this is Marilla. Who is this?

Well, this is your cousin, Jeannie.

I got another one of them.

Hello, Jeannie.

It's been a long time.

How's the family?

Uh, how did you get here?

I came with Abdul.

Oh, Marilla has brought a friend with her.

MYRT: By flying carpet.

Oh, she came by flying carpet.

Jeannie, we're getting out of here.

But I-- I-- Come on.

[♪♪♪]

They hung up.

Boy, we've really landed in a den of kooks.

Come on, we better get dinner ready.

Are you sure this is all right with my uncle?

Listen, you just leave your little old uncle to me.

I've planned a meal tonight that just won't stop.

Pottage oriental, pheasant, truffles, baba rum.

[SNIFFS] Smell that?

It smells like something's burning.

But that's impossible.

I've hired two of the greatest chefs in the world.

Abdul and Marilla.

They wouldn't know how to burn anything if they tried.

Excuse me a minute.

[COUGHING]

Hey, wait a minute. What's going on out here?

Oh, hiya, master.

We're cooking.

What is it, old shoe? It smells terrible.

Sorry, I thought you'd like it.

I hate to offend you, Marilla. It's just when Jeannie cooks,

everything seems to come out so great.

Oh, you mean my cousin Jeannie?

Look, maybe this isn't what you do best.

Do you have some specialty? Oh, yes.

Now we're getting somewhere. What is it?

Sawing people in half.

We'll eat, uh, in 10 minutes.

It won't be ready for two hours, master.

Dinner won't be ready for a couple of hours.

I guess they're on Baghdad time out there.

I promised my uncle I'd be home early tonight.

Look, I told you not to worry about your uncle.

Well, he's been a bit edgy lately.

How can you tell?

He's up for a promotion.

You-- You mean they're--?

They're going to send him away?

No, he was supposed to be made head of the Medical Department,

but he doesn't think he's going to get it.

Some machine in Washington decides who's right for the job.

He's jumpy because he thinks he won't get the job?

That's right.

And if he gets the job,

he'll be in a mellow mood and get off my back?

He's already heard that he's not gonna get it.

Sheila?

Mm-hm?

There are not too many people I can tell this to,

but I'm probably as influential as anyone here on Cocoa Beach.

Twice as influential.

Your uncle wants that job,

I'm going to give it to him.

You're going to give it to him?

I mean I'm going to see that he gets it.

You know someone that could help?

You, uh-- You might say that.

You're marvelous.

[SIGHS] I won't argue with that.

Look, little one,

if you could have anything in the world you wanted

what would you choose?

Oh, I don't know.

I've always wanted a mink coat.

You got it.

What do you mean I've got it?

Just what I say. It's yours.

Just like that?

Don't get me wrong.

No strings attached.

It's just that I have this thing

about wanting to see pretty girls happy.

You're a pretty girl, you got a mink coat, it's yours,

and now you're a happy, pretty girl.

Roger!

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

TONY: Roger! Roger, open up!

I know you're in there.

It's my other influential friend.

Excuse me.

Tony. Jeannie?

Jeannie!

Captain Nelson, uh, this is Dr. Bellows' niece.

Hello.

And this is his...

friend, Jeannie.

Where is she? Where's who?

Marilla. Marilla.

Oh, what a treasure.

I can't thank you enough.

So you didn't bring her here, huh?

Well, I told you I did not.

She came by flying carpet.

This is some kind of wartime code, isn't it?

It's wartime, all right.

Marilla?

They're calling us again.

Boy, they sure expect a lot of service for a free month's rent.

For two cents I'd tell him to take his apartment--

Ah!

Let's humor him a little bit, huh?

I'm sick and tired of sleeping on the beach.

Honestly, I don't know. [MUTTERING]

You called, master?

How about that?

She can't cook as well as you, but you should--

But she is not my cousin.

I don't care if she's related to you, she's marvelous.

Jeannie, I want you to get rid of them right away.

Hold it.

Sheila, I've decided we're going out for dinner tonight.

Wait in the car.

Uh, good night, all.

Now, just a minute.

Those are my two genies you're trying to get rid of.

Now, if they stay around here, we'll all get in trouble.

Wait, how come you can have a genie and I can't have one?

What are you, some kind of Indian genie giver?

You gave me two genies. I like 'em and I'm keeping 'em.

But I did not send them. You keep out of this.

Wait a minute, you're forgetting one thing.

I have two genies and you only got one.

If you don't behave, I'm going to take your genie away.

Yeah? Try it. Go ahead, blink her out.

Blink her out.

"Blink her out"?

Give her the old "one, two, three."

[MOUTHS] "One, two, three"?

[PHONE RINGS]

Yeah, well... saved by the phone.

Hello.

Oh, Dr. Bellows. How are you?

Yeah, Sheila's here.

ROGER: What time will I have her home?

Oh, I don't know. Three in the morning,

4 in the morning. It depends on my mood.

Are you sure this is Captain Healey?

ROGER: Yes, and Captain Healey has some news for you.

I decided to make you head of the Medical Department.

You've decided to make me

head of the Medical Department?

That's right, doc.

Roge, what do you think you're doing?

Look, you'll have confirmation tomorrow at, uh...

Would, uh, 10:00 in the morning be all right?

Yes, fine with me.

Ten o'clock tomorrow morning, doc.

[PHONE CLICKS]

I just made Dr. Bellows a very happy man

and I decided to let you keep your genie.

That's the least I can do for my best friend.

Abdul, Marilla, give them my dinner.

See you tomorrow morning.

[♪♪♪]

Come on, girl, we're getting out of here

before they bring on Ali Baba and the forty thieves.

"Blink her out"?

That is not Marilla.

I don't care what her name is, Jeannie,

you're the only one that could've brought her here.

If you think I'm going to stand by and allow this to happen--

"Abdul, the Great and Company."

That's right, mate.

I thought show business was wacky.

You've got us topped. Come on, Myrt.

You're not genies, then?

Are you kidding, sweetie?

I don't even know what you're talkin' about.

Will you tell your friend...

thanks for the use of the hall?

Bye.

Bye.

[♪♪♪]

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Well, master?

I'm very sorry, Jeannie. I--

[CHUCKLES] I thought they were real genies.

Heh-heh-heh-heh.

That's what Roger thought.

And that is why he acted so strangely.

Oh, what will happen when he learns the truth?

I think he might spend about five years in a place called...

Andromeda Inlet.

[♪♪♪]

A long rest is indicated, captain,

and that's just what you're going to get.

I-I feel fine, sir. I just made a little mistake.

Captain,

do you know what megalomania is?

Not exactly, sir.

It's when you tell me that you're making me

head of the Medical Department at 10:00.

You see, I happen to know that I've already been rejected.

[KNOCK ON DOOR] Come in.

Excuse me, sir. These orders just came through for you.

I thought you might like to see them.

Thank you.

And congratulations, sir.

Congratulations?

On being appointed the head of the Medical Department here.

[MOUTHS] Jeannie.

I don't know what to say.

They told me I'd find you here.

Sheila, where--?

Isn't it beautiful?

It's beautiful.

Captain Healey bought it for me.

Captain, are you prepared to pay for that coat?

Uh, how much did it cost?

Five thousand dollars.

[MUTTERING] Five thousand...

Five thousand dollars, at exactly $10 a week

would make $100...

[♪♪♪]