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1
00:00:08,385 --> 00:00:10,242
There it is.
2
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Valencia.
3
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How do you think this should go down?
4
00:00:13,318 --> 00:00:16,354
Do you think I should save the kingdom
and then rescue Madalena?
5
00:00:16,356 --> 00:00:17,941
Or do you think
I should rescue, then save?
6
00:00:17,942 --> 00:00:21,082
'Cause I just want it to have
a dramatic build, you know?
7
00:00:21,083 --> 00:00:22,736
I mean, either way,
8
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we're all gonna live happily ever after.
9
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Yep.
10
00:00:25,878 --> 00:00:27,228
I'm sure that's exactly how
it's going to be.
11
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Especially the living part.
12
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For you.
13
00:00:30,099 --> 00:00:32,090
No reason why you wouldn't keep on living.
14
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Your life.
15
00:00:34,185 --> 00:00:35,703
You know you're talking, right?
16
00:00:42,525 --> 00:00:50,611
♪ I can't believe
we're al-l-mo-o-st the-e-e-re ♪
17
00:00:57,653 --> 00:01:03,459
♪ I can't believe he's al-l-mo-o-st here ♪
18
00:01:03,460 --> 00:01:05,148
You're little Valencian princess
19
00:01:05,149 --> 00:01:07,006
is leading Galavant right into my trap.
20
00:01:07,007 --> 00:01:09,572
He'll be here tonight as the sun has cast
21
00:01:09,573 --> 00:01:11,665
its last shadow upon the earth
22
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and the crescent moon is risen
above the Eastern Ridge.
23
00:01:15,043 --> 00:01:16,730
So, like 9:00?
24
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Yes, Gareth, he'll be here at 9:00.
25
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And I cannot wait!
26
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I will kill Galavant
in front of the queen,
27
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surprise her with the jewel,
and then finally bed
28
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the most delicate flower
in the seven realms.
29
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Attention, donkey turds!
30
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Where is that pox-ridden
sack of deformities
31
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known as my hand maiden?
32
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My hair is a disaster.
33
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Gwynne?
34
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My hair!
35
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Forgive me, My Queen.
36
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Was that too much to ask?
37
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Just think about it, hmm?
38
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We could, uh, we could do
a picnic, you know?
39
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Something super cazh.
40
00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:57,720
For the hundredth time, no.
41
00:01:57,722 --> 00:02:01,573
Your mouth is saying no, but I can see
your rotten teeth through that smile.
42
00:02:01,574 --> 00:02:02,828
Go on, you!
43
00:02:03,701 --> 00:02:05,625
She's going to be so surprised!
44
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:07,888
No, she's not because you keep doing
45
00:02:07,889 --> 00:02:10,116
that stupid "evil king whisper" thing
46
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that everyone can hear.
47
00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:13,527
- How about this?
- Lower.
48
00:02:13,528 --> 00:02:15,147
- How about this?
- Oh, please.
49
00:02:15,148 --> 00:02:16,599
Oh, come on. That was good.
50
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For God's sakes, Gareth.
You're allowed to laugh.
51
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What are you two yabbering about?
52
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Nothing, darling. Nothing going on.
53
00:02:22,814 --> 00:02:25,615
That's right. There is nothing going on.
54
00:02:25,616 --> 00:02:28,013
I've been waiting for you
to find that jewel
55
00:02:28,014 --> 00:02:30,680
since we invaded this
wretched kingdom a year ago!
56
00:02:30,681 --> 00:02:34,057
Maddie, baby... chill.
57
00:02:34,058 --> 00:02:37,974
These things have a way
of... working themselves out.
58
00:02:37,975 --> 00:02:39,628
Why are you so calm?
59
00:02:39,629 --> 00:02:41,722
Normally when I yell at you,
you get tummy cramps
60
00:02:41,723 --> 00:02:43,883
and have to go poopy... your words.
61
00:02:43,884 --> 00:02:45,707
What can I say?
62
00:02:45,708 --> 00:02:49,117
I'm sleeping well, exercising,
laying off the wheat.
63
00:02:49,118 --> 00:02:51,176
Just in a really good place right now.
64
00:02:51,178 --> 00:02:53,338
You're inept.
65
00:02:53,339 --> 00:02:56,006
You're all inept!
66
00:02:56,007 --> 00:02:58,572
I can't even look at any of you anymore.
67
00:03:03,841 --> 00:03:05,663
♪ My husband's a wimp ♪
68
00:03:05,664 --> 00:03:08,466
♪ His henchmen are simply useless ♪
69
00:03:08,467 --> 00:03:10,896
♪ The servants and staff ♪
70
00:03:10,897 --> 00:03:14,139
♪ Are inbreeds and half-wits, too ♪
71
00:03:14,140 --> 00:03:17,785
♪ Oh, God, how I need someone here ♪
72
00:03:17,786 --> 00:03:20,385
♪ Willing to get things done here ♪
73
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♪ Someone who shares my point of view ♪
74
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♪ But who?! ♪
75
00:03:27,005 --> 00:03:28,996
♪ It's you ♪
76
00:03:28,997 --> 00:03:32,407
♪ No one but you ♪
77
00:03:32,408 --> 00:03:35,040
♪ No one's as smart and hard of heart ♪
78
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♪ And looks the part ♪
79
00:03:36,831 --> 00:03:38,113
♪ Like you ♪
80
00:03:38,115 --> 00:03:40,580
♪ Who'd pull off a coup d'etat like you ♪
81
00:03:40,580 --> 00:03:42,875
♪ While rockin' a push-up bra like you? ♪
82
00:03:42,876 --> 00:03:46,015
♪ Well, here's a clue, no one but you ♪
83
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♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ No one but me ♪
84
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♪ Nobody wheels and double-deals ♪
85
00:03:51,824 --> 00:03:54,659
♪ In killer heels like me ♪
86
00:03:54,660 --> 00:03:57,158
♪ There's nobody who could rule like you ♪
87
00:03:57,159 --> 00:04:00,163
♪ While making her subjects
drool like you ♪
88
00:04:00,164 --> 00:04:01,784
♪ While tough to the core like you ♪
89
00:04:01,785 --> 00:04:05,802
♪ Let's face it,
who's more like you than you? ♪
90
00:04:05,803 --> 00:04:08,199
♪ No one but you ♪
91
00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:10,563
♪ Who has the brains to break her chains ♪
92
00:04:10,564 --> 00:04:12,218
♪ And seize the reins? ♪
93
00:04:12,219 --> 00:04:13,839
♪ Yeah, you ♪
94
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:15,730
♪ It's been quite
the social climb for you ♪
95
00:04:15,731 --> 00:04:18,330
♪ And, honey, at last it's time for you ♪
96
00:04:18,331 --> 00:04:20,491
♪ So, answer the call for you ♪
97
00:04:20,492 --> 00:04:22,854
♪ And go take it all for you ♪
98
00:04:22,855 --> 00:04:25,049
♪ Who else is going to? ♪
99
00:04:25,050 --> 00:04:28,629
♪ Yes, who? ♪
♪ No one ♪
100
00:04:28,630 --> 00:04:30,655
♪ But yo-o-o-u ♪
101
00:04:30,656 --> 00:04:34,268
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ You ♪
102
00:04:34,269 --> 00:04:36,294
Get it, girl! You the queen!
103
00:04:36,172 --> 00:04:37,556
Go get 'em, girl!
104
00:04:46,915 --> 00:04:50,040
Oh, sorry. I really had to pee.
105
00:04:50,042 --> 00:04:53,339
It takes so long to undo all
the laces on my riding pants.
106
00:04:53,341 --> 00:04:55,803
You know, someone should come up
with something
107
00:04:55,804 --> 00:04:58,029
around the crotch
that would just go "zip."
108
00:04:58,030 --> 00:05:00,255
You could do your business
and be done with it.
109
00:05:00,256 --> 00:05:03,054
That is the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.
110
00:05:03,055 --> 00:05:04,168
Tell him, Izzy.
111
00:05:04,169 --> 00:05:05,618
It's not a great idea, Sid.
112
00:05:05,619 --> 00:05:06,968
Are you sure?
113
00:05:06,969 --> 00:05:08,283
I really feel like I'm on to something.
114
00:05:08,284 --> 00:05:10,037
Can we just focus?
115
00:05:10,038 --> 00:05:11,623
We've got a castle to storm.
116
00:05:11,624 --> 00:05:14,557
The sun's almost perfect
for hero lighting.
117
00:05:14,558 --> 00:05:16,177
I should do some push-ups.
118
00:05:16,178 --> 00:05:19,719
But wouldn't it be better
to storm the castle later?
119
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:21,540
Ooh, how about on a Wednesday?
120
00:05:21,541 --> 00:05:23,800
You never hear of anyone storming
a castle on a Wednesday.
121
00:05:23,802 --> 00:05:26,533
The thing is, is Wednesdays
are quite hard to rhyme with.
122
00:05:26,534 --> 00:05:28,119
And I'm pretty much 100% sure
123
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:29,805
they're gonna write songs
about this one, so...
124
00:05:29,806 --> 00:05:31,761
Interlocking little teeth
125
00:05:31,763 --> 00:05:33,921
right in the front of your pants
that zip together.
126
00:05:33,922 --> 00:05:35,743
- Sid!
- You're embarrassing yourself.
127
00:05:35,744 --> 00:05:39,723
I mean, it just feels like
you're rushing it.
128
00:05:39,724 --> 00:05:43,029
If you took the time to think about it...
129
00:05:43,030 --> 00:05:46,198
You smell. Really bad.
130
00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:49,169
Princess, I'm a knight of the seven realms
131
00:05:49,170 --> 00:05:50,787
about to ride into a battle so epic...
132
00:05:50,788 --> 00:05:52,576
Oh, God, yeah.
Yeah, we should find a place.
133
00:05:52,577 --> 00:05:54,262
I need to wash up.
134
00:05:54,263 --> 00:05:55,645
Oh. Good.
135
00:05:55,646 --> 00:05:58,141
I thought I was having a bath.
This is a church.
136
00:05:58,142 --> 00:06:00,435
This isn't just a church.
137
00:06:00,436 --> 00:06:04,584
It's the most famed and revered
monastery in Valencia.
138
00:06:06,407 --> 00:06:08,733
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
139
00:06:08,734 --> 00:06:11,769
♪ Welcome to our Abbey,
the best in the domain ♪
140
00:06:11,770 --> 00:06:14,367
♪ The order of our father
of perpetual refrain ♪
141
00:06:14,368 --> 00:06:15,851
♪ And we're the Monks ♪
142
00:06:15,852 --> 00:06:17,875
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
143
00:06:17,876 --> 00:06:19,528
- Back story, please.
- ♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
144
00:06:19,529 --> 00:06:21,552
Valencian Monks all take a vow of singing.
145
00:06:21,553 --> 00:06:23,542
- Oh, bravo! Kill me.
- ♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
146
00:06:23,543 --> 00:06:24,959
♪ Come in if you are weary ♪
147
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:26,207
♪ There's food if you would dine ♪
148
00:06:26,208 --> 00:06:29,277
♪ Plus 31 varieties of sacramental wine ♪
149
00:06:29,278 --> 00:06:30,390
♪ And we're the Monks ♪
150
00:06:30,928 --> 00:06:32,751
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
151
00:06:32,752 --> 00:06:35,416
♪ Hmmm ♪
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
152
00:06:35,417 --> 00:06:36,564
♪ I'm the smart one ♪
153
00:06:36,565 --> 00:06:38,318
♪ Ahh, Hallelu ♪
154
00:06:38,319 --> 00:06:39,869
♪ I'm the cute one ♪
155
00:06:39,870 --> 00:06:41,354
♪ Boopsy-doo ♪
156
00:06:41,355 --> 00:06:42,669
♪ I'm the shy one ♪
157
00:06:42,670 --> 00:06:43,715
♪ Peekaboo ♪
158
00:06:43,716 --> 00:06:45,705
♪ And I'm the bad boy ♪
159
00:06:45,706 --> 00:06:48,404
♪ But not so bad 'cause I'm a monk ♪
160
00:06:48,405 --> 00:06:50,293
♪ Bless you, children ♪
♪ ooh ooh ooh-ooh ♪
161
00:06:50,294 --> 00:06:52,823
We seek shelter...
162
00:06:52,824 --> 00:06:55,926
Water for our horses,
and a bath for my friend.
163
00:06:55,927 --> 00:06:58,557
♪ We'll fetch the holy water
and holy soap, as well ♪
164
00:06:58,558 --> 00:07:01,425
♪ 'Cause, holy Guacamole,
that one reeks to holy hell ♪
165
00:07:01,426 --> 00:07:03,617
♪ And we're the Monks ♪
166
00:07:03,618 --> 00:07:05,304
♪ Hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
167
00:07:05,305 --> 00:07:06,957
♪ Ooh wee-ahh ♪
168
00:07:06,958 --> 00:07:09,521
♪ Jazz hands ♪
169
00:07:09,522 --> 00:07:10,803
♪ Yeah! ♪
170
00:07:10,804 --> 00:07:13,097
Can't we just have a normal adventure?
171
00:07:15,189 --> 00:07:18,561
Is there anyone available
to counsel a person
172
00:07:18,562 --> 00:07:20,383
who might, through no fault of her own,
173
00:07:20,384 --> 00:07:22,980
be feeling guilty about a
fatal plot she's put into motion
174
00:07:22,981 --> 00:07:26,354
which could lead to the demise of someone
she's grown a little fond of?
175
00:07:27,559 --> 00:07:29,245
Just nod yes or no.
176
00:07:37,737 --> 00:07:39,826
Where are the kitchen trolls?
177
00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:42,995
Ah.
178
00:07:44,479 --> 00:07:46,400
Hey, m'lady.
179
00:07:46,401 --> 00:07:49,129
Who do I have to disembowel
around here to get a cup of tea?
180
00:07:49,130 --> 00:07:51,253
Oh, a thousand apologies.
181
00:07:51,254 --> 00:07:54,253
I was busy preparing
for tonight's celebration.
182
00:07:54,254 --> 00:07:55,567
Celebration for what?
183
00:07:55,568 --> 00:07:57,050
Oh, I... I wouldn't know.
184
00:07:57,051 --> 00:07:59,040
I-I'm just trying to stay alive,
185
00:07:59,041 --> 00:08:01,871
and I find it helps
not to ask too many questions.
186
00:08:07,164 --> 00:08:09,321
You're close with the king, aren't you?
187
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:13,298
Eh, I wouldn't call us close,
but we hang, yeah.
188
00:08:14,242 --> 00:08:17,849
And, um, you fancy Gwynne, my hand maiden.
189
00:08:17,850 --> 00:08:19,668
Sha'!
190
00:08:19,669 --> 00:08:24,455
Listen, I know Richard's
keeping something from me.
191
00:08:24,456 --> 00:08:26,950
You find out what he has up his sleeve,
192
00:08:26,951 --> 00:08:31,197
and I will help you
get Gwynne into your bed.
193
00:08:31,198 --> 00:08:32,680
Ooh.
194
00:08:32,681 --> 00:08:34,635
A generous offer, My Queen,
195
00:08:34,636 --> 00:08:36,589
but I'm not even sure
we could both fit into my bed.
196
00:08:38,613 --> 00:08:39,961
You sleep in the kitchen?
197
00:08:39,962 --> 00:08:43,130
Or... Do I cook in my room?
198
00:08:43,131 --> 00:08:45,960
Why do I even talk to poor people?
199
00:08:45,961 --> 00:08:48,287
Do we have a deal?
200
00:08:48,288 --> 00:08:49,432
What the hell?
201
00:08:49,433 --> 00:08:51,758
I need all the help I can get.
202
00:08:51,759 --> 00:08:53,410
I sleep in a freaking kitchen.
203
00:08:53,411 --> 00:08:54,691
Okay.
204
00:08:54,692 --> 00:08:57,421
The king is having a secret meeting
205
00:08:57,422 --> 00:08:59,578
where I'm to serve snacks
and a light refreshment
206
00:08:59,579 --> 00:09:01,971
as soon as the croaks of the frogs
207
00:09:01,972 --> 00:09:03,893
usher in the raven's last call.
208
00:09:03,894 --> 00:09:05,645
So, like 9:00?
209
00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:07,196
Yeah, 9:00.
210
00:09:07,197 --> 00:09:08,510
Excellent.
211
00:09:08,511 --> 00:09:10,264
Take me there.
212
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:12,737
Yes, m'lady.
213
00:09:13,570 --> 00:09:16,832
And King Richard said
if I didn't bring the jewel
214
00:09:16,833 --> 00:09:18,884
and Galavant back, he'd kill my parents.
215
00:09:18,885 --> 00:09:20,264
So, I lied to Galavant
216
00:09:20,265 --> 00:09:22,149
and told him
that the queen still loved him.
217
00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:24,268
He's walking into a trap of my own making!
218
00:09:24,269 --> 00:09:25,985
What can I do?
219
00:09:27,294 --> 00:09:29,279
Break your vow, or I break your pipe.
220
00:09:32,143 --> 00:09:35,171
- ♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum bum ♪
- So, uh...
221
00:09:35,172 --> 00:09:36,684
♪ Bum ba-dum bum bum ♪
222
00:09:36,685 --> 00:09:39,982
So, basically, you made a deal
with the evil king,
223
00:09:39,983 --> 00:09:42,337
but that was before you fell
for the handsome knight...
224
00:09:42,339 --> 00:09:44,457
Fell... fell for what? Fell for him?
225
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:46,544
My child, if you argue,
I'm never gonna be able
226
00:09:46,545 --> 00:09:48,125
to make it back in time
for their big finish.
227
00:09:48,126 --> 00:09:49,774
But I need your advice.
228
00:09:49,775 --> 00:09:51,557
I'm supposed to bring Galavant to the king
229
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:54,416
when the barking of the hounds
wakens the fairies in the evening
230
00:09:54,417 --> 00:09:56,335
so that they may begin
their nocturnal dance.
231
00:09:56,336 --> 00:09:58,522
So, like 9:00?
232
00:09:57,978 --> 00:10:00,402
Yeah. 9:00.
233
00:10:02,814 --> 00:10:07,122
It's 9:03. Why am I the only one
who's ever on time?
234
00:10:08,638 --> 00:10:11,061
There should be a standardized system
235
00:10:11,062 --> 00:10:13,619
based on the rotation of the earth
236
00:10:13,620 --> 00:10:16,784
in relation to its position
to the sun and the moon.
237
00:10:16,785 --> 00:10:19,039
You sound like a witch.
238
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:22,305
Regardless, it is very rude of Galavant
239
00:10:22,306 --> 00:10:24,325
to be late to his own killing.
240
00:10:24,326 --> 00:10:26,312
Galavant's coming?
241
00:10:26,313 --> 00:10:28,297
The king didn't give me a head count.
242
00:10:28,298 --> 00:10:30,486
Oh, I came up with the most perfect line
243
00:10:30,487 --> 00:10:32,102
for when I first see him.
244
00:10:32,103 --> 00:10:34,593
In my most intimidating voice,
I'm going to say,
245
00:10:34,594 --> 00:10:38,027
"Well, well, well"...
246
00:10:38,028 --> 00:10:39,609
Nope. I'm gonna save it.
247
00:10:40,654 --> 00:10:41,830
Oh. Here we go.
248
00:10:44,357 --> 00:10:46,645
Well, well...
249
00:10:47,825 --> 00:10:50,315
- Where the hell's Galavant?
- There's been a change in plans.
250
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:53,479
You'll get the jewel
and set my parents free,
251
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,960
but Galavant stays alive.
252
00:10:54,961 --> 00:10:56,879
I see.
253
00:10:56,880 --> 00:10:58,933
How utterly predictable.
254
00:10:58,934 --> 00:11:02,131
The princess has fallen
for the noble knight.
255
00:11:02,132 --> 00:11:04,050
Of course she has.
256
00:11:04,051 --> 00:11:06,036
I can't let a guy like that live.
257
00:11:06,037 --> 00:11:07,417
Well, then the deal is off.
258
00:11:07,418 --> 00:11:09,033
You'll never see the jewel again.
259
00:11:09,034 --> 00:11:11,995
You're adorable.
260
00:11:11,996 --> 00:11:13,443
No, my darling.
261
00:11:13,444 --> 00:11:16,237
You see, you will bring me Galavant
262
00:11:16,238 --> 00:11:21,022
and the jewel or else
you'll suffer the same fate...
263
00:11:21,024 --> 00:11:23,105
As your parents!
264
00:11:24,352 --> 00:11:27,415
- It's all right, honey.
- We're alive.
265
00:11:27,415 --> 00:11:28,346
What?!
266
00:11:28,348 --> 00:11:30,747
The king convinced us it would be funny.
267
00:11:30,748 --> 00:11:33,036
We've been prisoners a long time.
268
00:11:33,037 --> 00:11:34,551
We lost perspective.
269
00:11:34,552 --> 00:11:37,716
You should have seen your face!
270
00:11:37,717 --> 00:11:39,096
You were like, "aah!"
271
00:11:40,309 --> 00:11:41,452
"Ooh!"
272
00:11:41,453 --> 00:11:43,102
Oh, but make no mistake.
273
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:44,987
If you don't bring me Galavant,
I will kill them.
274
00:11:46,301 --> 00:11:47,849
For realsies.
275
00:11:50,691 --> 00:11:54,794
♪ And we're the Monks,
hey, hey, we're the Monks ♪
276
00:11:54,796 --> 00:11:57,554
♪ Yeah ♪
277
00:11:57,556 --> 00:11:58,834
What's happening?
278
00:11:58,835 --> 00:12:00,181
I'll tell you what's happening.
279
00:12:00,182 --> 00:12:01,639
Our Sid sings like a freaking angel.
280
00:12:01,630 --> 00:12:03,783
No, this plan, this whole thing.
281
00:12:03,784 --> 00:12:06,679
- How did it come to this?
- Princess, relax.
282
00:12:06,680 --> 00:12:08,228
It's gonna go great.
283
00:12:08,229 --> 00:12:11,258
They already expect these guys
to perform at the castle.
284
00:12:11,259 --> 00:12:12,835
We're just gonna sneak in with them
285
00:12:12,837 --> 00:12:14,856
and infiltrate from the inside.
286
00:12:17,150 --> 00:12:19,169
Turns out you were right.
287
00:12:19,170 --> 00:12:21,323
As usual, I needed a better plan.
288
00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:22,670
Galavant...
289
00:12:22,671 --> 00:12:24,656
I'm only magnanimous once every 10 years,
290
00:12:24,657 --> 00:12:26,305
so just let this happen.
291
00:12:26,306 --> 00:12:29,302
You saw the best in me and...
292
00:12:29,303 --> 00:12:33,431
Ultimately reminded me what
it means to be a real knight.
293
00:12:33,612 --> 00:12:34,689
And here we are.
294
00:12:34,690 --> 00:12:37,180
So, thank you...
295
00:12:37,181 --> 00:12:41,489
For bringing me back to me.
296
00:12:41,490 --> 00:12:45,663
Against all the odds, it's, um...
297
00:12:45,664 --> 00:12:48,592
Well, it's been a pleasure.
298
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:52,733
You really don't
have to thank me for anything.
299
00:12:52,734 --> 00:12:56,941
You actually have
a lot of nice qualities...
300
00:12:56,942 --> 00:12:58,187
All on your own.
301
00:12:58,995 --> 00:13:00,678
Careful, princess.
302
00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:02,698
You're getting dangerously close
to paying me a compliment.
303
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:05,223
I can do compliments.
304
00:13:05,224 --> 00:13:08,219
I mean, you know your way around a horse,
305
00:13:08,220 --> 00:13:11,316
you're not so bad with a sword,
306
00:13:11,317 --> 00:13:14,413
and your beard magically stays
the same length all the time.
307
00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:21,080
And... you have an ability to see
the best in people
308
00:13:21,081 --> 00:13:23,537
even after they've wronged you.
309
00:13:25,625 --> 00:13:28,485
Like with Madalena.
310
00:13:28,486 --> 00:13:30,203
Right.
311
00:13:30,204 --> 00:13:31,886
Madalena.
312
00:13:31,887 --> 00:13:36,229
Oh, man, this robe
is really itching my junk.
313
00:13:36,230 --> 00:13:38,821
Oh, you left your clothes on underneath.
314
00:13:39,763 --> 00:13:40,938
Right.
315
00:13:52,783 --> 00:13:55,435
I hope you're pleased
with what I've shown you.
316
00:13:55,436 --> 00:13:56,947
Judging by the pressure
317
00:13:56,948 --> 00:13:59,500
and what seems like the amount
of exclamation points,
318
00:13:59,501 --> 00:14:01,347
it's a little hard to tell.
319
00:14:01,348 --> 00:14:03,126
This is the writing of a happy queen
320
00:14:03,127 --> 00:14:06,552
who's decided to take control
and set a secret, evil plan in motion.
321
00:14:06,553 --> 00:14:08,231
Ooh!
322
00:14:08,232 --> 00:14:11,925
Let's keep that last part
just between the two of us.
323
00:14:11,926 --> 00:14:13,706
For your fastest pigeon.
324
00:14:13,707 --> 00:14:17,534
This absolutely, positively
has to be there overnight.
325
00:14:17,535 --> 00:14:21,362
You upheld your end of the
bargain, so I'll uphold mine.
326
00:14:21,365 --> 00:14:24,386
You have my permission to make
the most romantic of meals tonight
327
00:14:24,386 --> 00:14:25,963
for you and my hand maiden.
328
00:14:25,964 --> 00:14:27,945
Spare no expense...
Fresh oysters, braised rabbit,
329
00:14:27,946 --> 00:14:29,860
and a nice Bordeaux
from my private cellar.
330
00:14:29,861 --> 00:14:31,975
Oh, I don't even know if she'll say yes.
331
00:14:31,976 --> 00:14:35,401
I mean, we flirt and stuff,
but when I ask her on a date, bubkes.
332
00:14:35,402 --> 00:14:37,651
God, do I have to do everything
around here?
333
00:14:37,652 --> 00:14:39,498
Gwynne!
334
00:14:39,499 --> 00:14:41,950
You're having dinner tonight
with smallpox over here.
335
00:14:41,951 --> 00:14:43,865
Yes, m'lady.
336
00:14:43,866 --> 00:14:46,081
You two aren't cousins
or anything, are you?
337
00:14:46,082 --> 00:14:49,204
Ah, who cares? You guys couldn't
get any weirder looking.
338
00:14:54,276 --> 00:14:56,156
I know a hook-up from your boss
339
00:14:56,157 --> 00:14:58,608
isn't the smoothest thing, but...
340
00:14:58,609 --> 00:15:00,657
I don't care.
341
00:15:00,658 --> 00:15:04,015
Because, truthfully, I think
we could be great together.
342
00:15:04,016 --> 00:15:07,474
But love isn't meant for people like us.
343
00:15:07,475 --> 00:15:10,329
I beg to differ.
344
00:15:13,218 --> 00:15:18,087
♪ If I could share my life with you ♪
345
00:15:18,088 --> 00:15:22,117
♪ Just think how happy we'd be ♪
346
00:15:22,118 --> 00:15:26,214
♪ We'd share our hovel built for two ♪
347
00:15:26,215 --> 00:15:28,431
♪ Complete with vermin for three ♪
348
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:34,006
♪ We could while away each hopeless day ♪
349
00:15:34,007 --> 00:15:37,398
♪ Comparing open sores ♪
350
00:15:37,399 --> 00:15:41,496
♪ Yes, life would blow,
but much less, though ♪
351
00:15:41,497 --> 00:15:44,787
♪ If I could share mine with yours ♪
352
00:15:44,788 --> 00:15:47,876
No, I can't. It's impossible!
353
00:15:47,877 --> 00:15:51,738
♪ If I could share my life with you ♪
354
00:15:51,739 --> 00:15:54,761
♪ Admit it, it would be nice ♪
355
00:15:54,762 --> 00:15:59,429
♪ We'd share one cot, one chamber pot ♪
356
00:15:59,430 --> 00:16:03,661
♪ Plus trench mouth, tapeworms, and lice ♪
357
00:16:03,662 --> 00:16:07,120
♪ We would have a dozen kids ♪
358
00:16:07,121 --> 00:16:11,620
♪ And maybe one won't die ♪
359
00:16:11,621 --> 00:16:12,796
♪ And the plague ♪
360
00:16:12,797 --> 00:16:13,904
♪ The runs ♪
361
00:16:13,905 --> 00:16:15,886
♪ Invading huns ♪
362
00:16:15,887 --> 00:16:19,513
♪ Just think how time would fly ♪
363
00:16:19,514 --> 00:16:23,375
♪ If you could share your life with me ♪
364
00:16:23,376 --> 00:16:27,371
♪ I'll Cherish every foul breath ♪
365
00:16:27,372 --> 00:16:29,353
- ♪ The filth ♪
- ♪ The rot ♪
366
00:16:29,354 --> 00:16:31,637
♪ The leprosy ♪
367
00:16:31,638 --> 00:16:35,432
♪ The painful, lingering death ♪
368
00:16:35,433 --> 00:16:39,630
♪ Thank the Lord our life expectancy ♪
369
00:16:39,631 --> 00:16:42,417
♪ Is merely 32 ♪
370
00:16:44,635 --> 00:16:49,672
♪ Yeah, it might be sweet misery ♪
371
00:16:49,673 --> 00:17:00,888
♪ To share what's left with yo-o-o-u ♪
372
00:17:00,890 --> 00:17:05,322
So, me, you, dinner tonight, my place.
373
00:17:05,323 --> 00:17:06,934
You bring that pretty
little smile of yours,
374
00:17:06,935 --> 00:17:08,714
and I'll supply the rest.
375
00:17:08,930 --> 00:17:11,211
Yes!
376
00:17:22,066 --> 00:17:25,844
Right, princess. You ready
to get your kingdom back?
377
00:17:25,845 --> 00:17:27,483
I've been thinking.
378
00:17:27,484 --> 00:17:29,724
I can get another kingdom.
It's a buyer's market right now.
379
00:17:29,725 --> 00:17:31,196
Let's just free my parents,
380
00:17:31,197 --> 00:17:32,400
get Madalena, and get us out of here.
381
00:17:32,401 --> 00:17:33,571
Absolutely not.
382
00:17:33,572 --> 00:17:36,179
When I make a promise, I keep it.
383
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:37,718
We're gonna get your kingdom back.
384
00:17:37,719 --> 00:17:39,089
- But...
- Once the concert starts,
385
00:17:39,090 --> 00:17:41,431
we're gonna have about an hour
to move about the castle.
386
00:17:41,432 --> 00:17:42,835
Where do you think
they're keeping your parents?
387
00:17:42,836 --> 00:17:46,782
Perhaps they're up your butt.
388
00:17:46,783 --> 00:17:49,893
Y-you see, because
that's the most unlikely place.
389
00:17:49,894 --> 00:17:53,136
I mean, obviously, her parents
couldn't be up your...
390
00:17:53,138 --> 00:17:54,976
Well, well, well.
391
00:17:54,977 --> 00:17:57,451
Ah, it's too late.
I had to go for the stupid butt joke.
392
00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,358
Forget it. Guards, just seize them.
393
00:18:07,219 --> 00:18:08,657
Your move...
394
00:18:08,658 --> 00:18:10,731
'Cause I haven't killed anybody all day.
395
00:18:10,732 --> 00:18:13,138
Gareth, we agreed
I would say the cool things.
396
00:18:13,139 --> 00:18:16,211
- So, what's it gonna be?
- Damn it, Gareth!
397
00:18:17,393 --> 00:18:18,557
Fine.
398
00:18:18,558 --> 00:18:19,828
Galavant, no!
399
00:18:19,829 --> 00:18:21,501
Now let her go.
400
00:18:21,502 --> 00:18:23,307
She had nothing to do with this.
401
00:18:23,308 --> 00:18:26,250
You are so noble.
402
00:18:26,251 --> 00:18:27,922
And yet the women in your life
403
00:18:27,923 --> 00:18:29,695
never seem to honor that nobility.
404
00:18:29,696 --> 00:18:32,906
In fact, this one tricked you
into coming all the way here
405
00:18:32,907 --> 00:18:34,345
so I could kill you.
406
00:18:37,389 --> 00:18:38,424
What?
407
00:18:39,797 --> 00:18:42,572
Well, well, well...
408
00:18:42,573 --> 00:18:45,315
Looks like it's time for dinner.
409
00:18:45,316 --> 00:18:48,124
- Nailed it.
- Boom.
410
00:18:51,121 --> 00:18:54,963
But... what the... all that time...
411
00:18:54,965 --> 00:18:57,038
He may not be able to talk, but I can.
412
00:18:57,039 --> 00:18:58,677
This is messed up, princess!
413
00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:00,853
I didn't have a choice.
He was going to kill my parents.
414
00:19:00,853 --> 00:19:02,056
Shut up!
415
00:19:03,395 --> 00:19:06,705
Well, seems like you kids
have lots to talk about.
416
00:19:06,706 --> 00:19:08,611
I'll let you get to it.
417
00:19:08,612 --> 00:19:10,050
Oh, but do hurry.
418
00:19:10,051 --> 00:19:12,525
I'm executing Galavant in 10 minutes. Hmm.
419
00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:15,267
It's nice to finally
have people down here.
420
00:19:15,268 --> 00:19:16,739
Feels lived in.
421
00:19:16,740 --> 00:19:20,117
I'm so sorry.
I wanted to tell you, but I...
422
00:19:20,118 --> 00:19:22,257
But what?
423
00:19:22,258 --> 00:19:24,086
You didn't have time?
424
00:19:24,132 --> 00:19:25,837
Not in the hundreds of miles we traveled
425
00:19:25,838 --> 00:19:27,542
or the meals we shared?
426
00:19:27,543 --> 00:19:31,823
In retrospect, the trip
through the forest of honesty
427
00:19:31,824 --> 00:19:33,329
would have seemed like
an appropriate time.
428
00:19:33,330 --> 00:19:34,901
But my family.
429
00:19:34,902 --> 00:19:38,681
Well, perhaps if you'd told me,
we could have made a plan.
430
00:19:38,682 --> 00:19:40,821
And you would have helped me?
431
00:19:40,822 --> 00:19:42,961
Even if you had nothing to gain from it?
432
00:19:42,962 --> 00:19:46,909
I guess we'll never find out.
433
00:19:49,385 --> 00:19:51,792
If even a single ounce of you was real,
434
00:19:51,793 --> 00:19:53,363
just tell me one thing...
435
00:19:53,364 --> 00:19:55,304
Did Madalena want me to come for her?
436
00:19:55,305 --> 00:19:57,612
I don't know.
437
00:20:01,426 --> 00:20:02,562
No!
438
00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:27,915
Not so tough, are you now,
439
00:20:27,916 --> 00:20:28,951
Galavan...
440
00:20:30,305 --> 00:20:31,193
Aah!!
441
00:20:31,194 --> 00:20:33,300
Aah!!
442
00:20:39,924 --> 00:20:42,732
Hello, darling.
443
00:20:42,733 --> 00:20:44,237
Madalena?
444
00:20:45,844 --> 00:20:50,258
There's braised rabbit
and Bordeaux, your favorites.
445
00:20:50,259 --> 00:20:52,900
You saved me?
446
00:20:52,901 --> 00:20:54,873
Oh, I've done a lot more than that.
447
00:21:00,527 --> 00:21:02,667
We have a lot of catching up to do.
448
00:21:04,623 --> 00:21:07,349
I've written someone,
449
00:21:07,350 --> 00:21:10,059
and he's coming to execute my plan.
450
00:21:10,060 --> 00:21:11,965
He doesn't play nice.
451
00:21:15,578 --> 00:21:17,736
Everything's about to change.
33051
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